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Transcript

A Bucs LEGEND humiliated Scotty at our tailgate! · Scotty and Abby UNFILTERED

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Tampa Bay's best music is Magic 94.9.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: And welcome to a new episode of Scotty and Abby Unfiltered.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Do not meet your heroes. And I was never someone
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: that would say that. Because I do believe if you
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: love someone, you should let them know. And not in
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: a weird way, but in a complimentary way. You appreciate
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: the art. You appreciate who they are. So if you
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: see them out in the wild, say something.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Was it tough for you when you met the Wiggles
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: this weekend?
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't appreciate meeting them. It's just kind of crazy
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: because I'm going to.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: I don't... What?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: I'm embarrassed to share this story because, like, I'm still
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: kind of, like, reliving it in my head.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Well, we both have embarrassing things to talk about today.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: Well, here's the... Throw ourselves under the bus podcast. Yeah.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: But yesterday, we were at a tailgate for the Bucs,
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: and this is... gets me so mad because in my
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: head you have.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Been edging the story all day long i'm like oh
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: my god just tell me what.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: You said okay so at the tailgate there was a
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: hall of fame football player okay warren sap warren ship
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: you probably have no idea who that is it sounds
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: familiar he's one of the biggest names in football like
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: if you go into the stadium his name is literally
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: on the ring around the stadium like he's that big
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: so growing up being a massive football fan you know that.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: Name when was he on the box gosh.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: I'd say probably early 2000s oh wow okay yeah yeah
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: so it's been a little bit of time 2000s and
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: 2002 i don't know exactly the years but i remember
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: growing up with his name like you'd see friends with
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: his jersey and that was like you wear that jersey
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: you're a badass yesterday he's at the tailgate but here's
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: what happened we're in line for food and i look
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: over under the little wild fork table and i'm like
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: that dude that dude looks like Warren Sapp. And you know,
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: when you see a football player, like they're a massive human.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: He's six, eight. He's got bling. He's got a Superbowl
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: ring on his finger. And so I'm like, and I,
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: I wish I just didn't do this, but I look
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: at Brianna and I'm like, I'm pretty sure that's Warren Sapp.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: And she's like, who? She's like, I could care less,
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: but I'm like, no, I'm like pretty sure. Like I
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: want to geek out with somebody cause I have nobody
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: to geek out with. Yeah. So she looks it up.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: She's like, I'm pretty sure it is too. And I'm like,
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: I'm going to, I have to say something because this
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: is a legend. I would love to be able to
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: say hello. I'd love to be able to get a
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: picture and I would love to be able to show
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: my dad because that would be something that we could
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: bond over. So we finally get to the part of
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: the line where we're right next to him. He finally
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: like stops talking to a security guard, like looks over
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: at me and I just simply asked, so I don't
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: look like an idiot, but I was like, are you
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Warren Sapp? Like in a, Excited more so like, yes,
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: I know you're Warren Sapp, but God forbid you're not.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: And I look like a complete dick.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Or no, just like dumb.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, just dumb. And I like, are you Warren Sapp?
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: And he like says something smart, but he's like, last
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: time I checked.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Uh-huh.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: And I was like.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: He probably just hears that a lot.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I get it.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: That wasn't bad.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: You're a celeb in Tampa. You know what I mean? Yeah.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: And I was like okay fine cuz truthfully. He's a
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: lot thinner than when he was on the Bucks Okay,
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: it doesn't have to be that heavy anymore.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: He's skinty.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: He's skinty, but I was like are you Warren Sam?
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: He's like last time I checked I was like okay
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: I just have to say it's such an honor to
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: be able to meet you Like I grew up watching
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: you and he like stops me as I am like
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: saying hello. He's like bro, bro, bro, bro, bro That's
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: you're a grown man, and that's how you're gonna talk
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: to somebody and And I'm like, I try to play
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: it cool because this is in front of my girlfriend
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: and literally a line of fans for the station. And
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, you know, and he's like, don't be laughing. Like,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: I'm serious. And I'm like, oh, dude, man, I just
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: I grew up like watching you. I'd love to be
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: able to get a picture. He's like, absolutely not.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's so messed up. Well, I'm trying to I'm
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: trying not to say the F word as much.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: Because I know I want to actually like disclaimer because
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: my actual emotions. Yeah. Like I was fucking pissed. And
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: I felt so humiliated.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Scotty said the F word.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: I know. I was humiliated, though. Because you know when
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: you get the courage to finally say hello to someone,
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: and you do it, and it's literally that voice in
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: your head that's like, don't do it.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: What's the worst thing that could happen? That was the worst!
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: That was the worst thing that could happen! That was
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: the worst thing.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: That could happen! He literally said not only, he questioned
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: my manhood, which as a man, you never want to
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: have that happen.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: Be honest, how did you, okay, pretend I'm Warren Sapp. Okay.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: How did you, how do, what was your tone of voice?
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: What was your, did you go into full Sally smiles
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: a lot mode?
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: I walked up. I was like, are you, are you
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: Warren Sapp? Uh huh.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Last time I checked.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: I just got it. It is such an honor to
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: meet you. And I grew up. Pussy.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Shut up. Okay. Is that how it felt?
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: That's exactly how it felt. In my head, I'm like,
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: this is humiliating. You're not going to throw this a
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: joke and actually get a picture with me? You're actually
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: going to say no? He's like, no, think about what
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: you just said. Get back in line.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: Get back in line?
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Go get your food. Go talk to your girlfriend.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: No. And I'm like... Are you kidding me? That's so
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: messed up. What was he doing?
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: He was just standing there. Here's where I, like, what
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: makes me so mad. You're literally at the tailgate to
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: meet fans, you dick. That's literally your purpose.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're swearing. I know. You guys realize
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: the last time Scotty swore, we had to go into
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: an HR meeting?
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: I'll do it again for this. Because it just made
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: me so mad, because I was like two sandwiches in,
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: into the line, and I look over and our buddy
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: John Senning's getting a picture with him, and I'm like.
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: Because he's on the bone? Because he's on another radio station?
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: I didn't say I was on the radio station. I
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: was just saying hi.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: But why are you going to be in a setting
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: with a bunch of Bucks fans and you're not even
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: going to say hello?
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: That is the crazy thing. Crazy. Because I understand it's
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: probably annoying for people to approach you all the time,
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: especially if you're a Tampa legend and you're in Tampa. Yes.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: But you're at a Bucks tailgate. Like, it's objectively not
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: crazy for you to get approached. And also, I would
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: think you would kind of flip into, like, work mode.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? Correct.
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: Like, you fake it for a second. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: Or you say, I'm joking. Let's get a picture.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not getting caught off guard. You're a former
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Bucks legend.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: You're standing by the line where literally everyone's right there
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: saying hello to you. And it's not like I was over-exuberant. Like,
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: I really was. I put my.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: You put your man voice on?
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: I do.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: You put your heterosexual voice on?
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like I put on my bro self where I'm like,
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: all right, dude, it is so nice to meet you.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: You're a legend. I would love to be able to
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: get a pic. And he's like, that's how you're going
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: to approach a grown man? You're a grown man. You're
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: going to talk to me like that? That's crazy. I
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah. Like, what do you want me to say?
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: Like.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Who the fuck are you? Oh, yeah. What's up? And
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: then leave?
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: Like, no.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: You're, meh.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: He should not have treated, I mean, no one should
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: be treated that way, period. Yes. But, like, just you
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: saying all those kind things and then him being like.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: Pussy, pussy, what are you doing? You're going to.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: Jack off to a photo of me, Nancy?
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: You know that gay shit? He's like, my son's right there.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: I would never let my son talk to a guy
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: like that.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: He said that? Yes. That's crazy. Wait, let me look
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: this man up. I want to know what he looks like.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: And that's, you know what I walked away remembering?
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Let me reverse this man.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: I was thinking back. I was like, I do remember
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: him actually being one of those players that was an asshole.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: Like that's what he was known for.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's the CTE.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna blame it on a brain injury.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: No, like deadass. Like maybe his center for empathy and kindness.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: Is gone.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: Dude, this is a big boy. That's a big boy.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: So now he's thin.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: How thin? He looks maybe 230. Okay, so like a
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: normal size.
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: Extremely tall, but had swagger, had his jewelry on, had
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: his Super Bowl ring on.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: That's so sad.
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: It was so, like, I was just, I felt so
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: small in that moment where I was like.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: Well, anyone would feel small next to this dude. He's
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: like 300 pounds in this photo.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's massive. A massive player. A legend player.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: I'm so sorry that happened to you.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: It sucked.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: Do you need to talk about it?
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: No, well, this is my talking about it. This will
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: be the last time I mention it. Because I was like,
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: that's embarrassing. Yeah.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: That Bucks tailgate was hot.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: It was hot.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: We were on the face of the sun yesterday. This
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: is why I'm not a big tailgater.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: Literally my point.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: We need more fans. We need more fans. We need
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: more porta potties.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: More power. Yeah. You know, I was thinking, I don't
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: know how they'd build this, but like people in their
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: backyards now have those big old poles and they just
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: put over a shade over the whole thing. They should
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: do that for that lot. Yeah. Just shade it. If
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: you shade it, I guarantee you double the size. And
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: it was big.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: I mean, there's a lot of people there, but 100%
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: and I'm sure it'll get cooler as we do like
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: later games. But we were... Sorry, what we're talking about
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: is we were hosting a Bucs game or a Bucs
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: tailgate on Sunday. And, I mean, it was popping. Like,
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: the people were out.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: It's with us.
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: It's with the Bone staff, that radio station that hates us.
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: That hates us, that now I'm embarrassed to put my
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: face in front of.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: Be associated with. And so that's where he saw Warren Sapp.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: And then we were... Hosting it, I guess you could say.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Co-hosting with it, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and so we'd
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: be there for four hours, and I was like, respectfully,
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: I gotta go inside.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, yeah. You know, there's no cool-off area
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: is the problem. It's like, even if you get overheated, like,
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: where are you gonna go? Stand under an umbrella?
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: There's nowhere to go. So I went inside, and I
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: was like, I'll bartend. I went inside the Bud Light
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: bartending RV, and I was like, I will give out
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: drinks if that means I can stand next to this van.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: That actually, I think, is gonna be the next thing.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: If we ever go back... I'm going to hang out
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: there the whole time. Because then you get more interactions
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: with people. It's not like you're just walking up to
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: a random group.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think that was a good bit that
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: we had, like interviewing people as they were getting their drinks. Oh, wait,
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: did I tell you about this thing? Did you witness
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: this happen when I tried to ask somebody a question?
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Because this is a perfect example of what's the worst
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: thing that can happen when you approach someone. Like you
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: approaching Warren Sapp, what's the worst thing that can happen?
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: Essentially what happened to you. So Scotty and I were
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: doing interviews for social media, just like asking people questions
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: as they were getting their drinks. And I decided to
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: put myself out there and ask a question. I was like, whatever.
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: Maybe I'll do a Bayes on Bayshore type thing and
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: maybe ask people some questions. Anyway, so this guy is
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: getting a drink, and so I grab the mic, and
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: I go, hey, can I ask you a question for
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: our social media? And this guy looks at me and goes,
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: you already asked my girlfriend questions. I'm leaving. And I
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: was like, okay, first of all, I wasn't asking you
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: to suck your dick. Like... You know what I mean? Like,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: don't bring your girlfriend into this. You can just be like, no, thanks.
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like, no, I'm okay. Thank you.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: He's like, no, thanks. I have a girlfriend. Sorry, what?
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: I was just going to ask you, like, what's your
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: favorite Bucs player?
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Do you like football?
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: How do you feel about the Browns?
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Not trying to sleep with you.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: Not trying to have sex with you. Do you want
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: to have sex?
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: Third question.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: I'm like, now that we're bringing it up.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: Are you interested? Is your girlfriend down?
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Is your girlfriend down?
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: That's so funny. It's like people, it's just interesting because
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: it's like nine out of 10 people are good, but
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: you always seem to hit that one. And I, what's
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: funny is as we're passing the mic around for like,
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: I would do some, Alexi would do some, you would
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: do some. I was like, The person that Abby's going
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: to ask, it's just your luck.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: Oh, 100%. And I always say the worst thing possible.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: Not on purpose. It just happens to be. So like,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: for example, one of the guys that I interviewed, I said, okay,
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: so let's say you're in a fight in Ybor City.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Ybor City is like kind of the grungy party area
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: of Tampa, if you're not familiar. I said, you're getting
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: in a fight in Ybor City. Who are you calling
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: on the bucks for your backup? And he goes, well,
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: I was a cop in Ybor City for 20 years
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: or whatever. And I was like, you're fucking kidding me.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: You're like, literally, it's just a question. Well, no, no, no.
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: But it was just like, Of course, of all the
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: people I could have asked that specific, because I didn't
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: ask that question multiple times. I asked that question once.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: Of all the people for me to ask that question,
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: of course, I asked the Ybor City cop. And then
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: the other thing is, what was so funny is I
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: was like, okay, so who's going to be on your backup?
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: He goes, well, it's going to be my squad or
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: it's going to be Mike Allstott. And I'm like, are
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: you fucking kidding me? I'm like, he married into my
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: family or his son married into my family. And so
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: I was talking to him about that and he goes,
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: you know, it's funny that you say that because I
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: really think the universe is trying to bring me and
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Michael Stott together. And he's like, can you get me
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: in contact? I was like, I'm not going to do that.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: No, sir.
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: He barely knows me. You know what I mean?
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. I'm not that close.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: I'm not that close.
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: Let's not push it.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: I have to give the whole family tree every time
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: I say I know him. I'm like, well, my cousin,
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: who I'm very close with, married his son, who is
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Michael's not son.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: So every now and then at a family function, I'll
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: see him across the room.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: So every now and then I'll see him.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's so funny. He's like, how's Griffin? It's so random.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: It's just so funny that it's like, of course you.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: Out of everybody, you're going to get the one that's
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: had the off-the-wall answer.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I'm telling you, I have a curse. Like,
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: I will say, not the worst possible thing, but it's
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: always like that niche thing that like, you're like the
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: Ybor City cop thing. Like, of course, you're the one
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: Ybor City cop that I'm asking this question. I didn't
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: mean to.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're the one guy that wants to say, oh, no,
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: I have a girlfriend. Yes, it's fine. I'm not hitting
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: on you, sir. But I think we'll still do it.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: I'm just still going to ask people questions. And you
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: know what? I did say don't meet your heroes. I'll
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: do it again because I have met some other people
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: that are so friendly and so welcoming and so warm.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: Who have you met recently that you're like, oh, I'm
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: glad I met them?
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: That I'm actually glad I met.
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: Because I don't think I could meet Taylor Swift now
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: that I think about it. Oh, really?
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Because you think it would be too much?
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think I want to meet her.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to think artist-wise who I'd meet artist-wise that's
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: really cool.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Um.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: I can't think of anybody off the top of my head. Like,
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: I think of, like, now Young Gravy's pretty big, but
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: he was, like, a bro. Kat Stickler's pretty big now.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: She was super nice. Like, all these general people. Like,
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: the first time I met, like, Bobby Bones. And I
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: got a radio conference. I did, like, I was even,
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: I geeked out even bigger. Like, this is when I
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: first got into radio.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: And I freaked out.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: And he was like, okay, you're a grown man. Why
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: are you talking to me this way?
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: He's like, get out of my face.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: Get back in line. My son would never talk to
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: a grown man like this.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: You know what the difference is, though? Like, he, like,
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: he gave me a hug. He's like, man, I appreciate you.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: Because you're crying into his t-shirt. I love you so much.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: I was just telling him, like, I appreciate it for
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: what he did. And he was like, dude, that means
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: so much.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: Thank you for dying for our city's Bobby Bones.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: First is Warren Sapp, who's like, don't even look at me.
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: I'm like... Okay, I'll just, you know what, I'm gonna
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: go ask myself. Thank you, thank you.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: All right, cool. Have a good one. I'm going to
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: this port-a-potty and just, you know.
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: And it's like you wait for him to be like, nah,
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: I'm just joking, man.
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: Come here. Was he hammered? Was he drunk?
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: Probably I. Probably. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I saw them, like,
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: smoking behind the tent.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: Somebody was, because I smelled something.
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, that was them. Yeah, yeah. Oh, 100%. I literally
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: looked over, because here's what my brain does. You know what?
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: I could talk about this on the podcast. I'm a
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: nice guy. Yeah. But I still have, like, there's a
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: snake in me. There's a snake in my boot. There's
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: a snake in my boot. When I was young and
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: I would get picked on, I knew I had to
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: have the quickest, like, strike back. I was like, you're
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: not going to make me feel less than. You're not
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: going to make me feel small. Yeah. And so as
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: soon as that happened, my head, like, starts doing crazy thoughts.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: He's like, how could I ruin his career? How could
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: I put something on the internet? What could I put?
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: What rumor could I stir?
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: He's already a legend. There's nothing we can do.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: Literally, I can't even say some of the things I
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: thought of. But I was like, Scott, chill out. Respectfully,
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: chill out. Chill out. Sit down. It's fine. You know what?
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: I don't even want a picture. I'm good. Yeah. You
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: want to be like that? I'm fine. But my head
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: in all that moment was like, revenge.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: Revenge.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: It was looking for any sort of revenge that I
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: could do. Yeah.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: That doesn't surprise me. I feel like you do have like,
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: three switches in your head and nine times out of
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: ten sally smiles a lot is on but the other
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: switches are your freak freaking the sheets oh my god
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: i know that's i knew that switch existed i'm like
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: yeah this this guy's a little freaky.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: And then i do what about me says i'm a
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: freaky kind of.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: Guy i do think you have like a big red
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: button in your head too that like it's under several
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: layers of barbed wire so you can't really get to
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: it but i do feel like there's a big red
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: button in there.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: A hundred percent.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: And it hasn't been pushed in a long time. I've
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: gotten really good about like tying that sucker up, putting
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: it away.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Warren Sapp pressed it pretty hard though. He got close.
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: He got real close. I was like, Scott, walk away.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: Take some breathers. You're good. All fine here.
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: Just picture like, you know, the inside out movie. I
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: can just picture it being like a fire drill in
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: your head being like, alert, alert. Someone protect the button!
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: Don't let him press the button!
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: I'm proud of how I stood up at that moment.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: Because I did afterwards, you think of like the clapbacks
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: you want to say.
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: And it was like five minutes after, I'm like, oh,
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: I could have said this.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: You're fighting this man in your shower. Oh, yeah.
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: I'm like, how dare you? It's fine.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: You know what?
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: It's fine. Take pictures with everyone else. I don't want
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: a picture with you. You suck. All right, I'm good.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: You want to go talk to John Senning about this?
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: Who got the photo? Who?
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: It's just when I saw John Senning walk up to him,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: I heard John, and this isn't against John, but he
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: did it right, I guess, which it shouldn't have mattered,
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: but he was like, yeah.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: He just grunted.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm on 102.5 The Bone, I do the show,
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: and so that kind of, I don't know why it
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: would even matter, but I guess that gave him credibility
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: for saying hello.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: No, I think that's valid.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: I could have said, I'm Scott from Magic Magic.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: No, don't tell, you're a grown man on a station
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: called Magic.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: That's what I literally thought too.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you can't say that. You'd have to lie and
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: say that you're on The Bone.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: I'm on 102.5 The Bone.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: Just say you're Mike Kelta. yeah no that's what you
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: should oh my god that's so funny next time we're
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: at the bud light tailgate you just need to start
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: introducing yourself to bone listeners and be like hey i'm
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: mike calta i'm mike calta from one or two five
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: the bone and just be like the most smiley big
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: mouth sally vibe.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: Possible that's the word he gets they take pictures they
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: tag mike and it's me deep breath deep breath i
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: feel healed I needed to get that off my chest.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: I've been literally thinking about that for 24 hours. I know.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: You know what I've been thinking about for 12 hours? What?
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: The drunk text that I sent last night.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: I'm so ready for this. I am.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: Okay. I need a deep breath before I talk about this.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. We're both so embarrassed.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: This is going to get back to him, by the way,
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: because we have mutual friends that'll talk to him about this. Oh, good.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: I'm so humiliated. See, I talk about this all the time,
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: and you guys think I'm exaggerating. I do not allow
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: myself to drink vodka because... I become the most fun,
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: chaotic version of myself. But the problem is the most fun,
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: chaotic version of myself leaves a wake of destruction that
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: then normal Abby has to deal with. I'm very like
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: when I have tequila, when I have wine, any like cock,
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: like I'm fine. Any cocktail, any cocktail, I'm like fine.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: I'm like a normal tipsy human being. When I have vodka,
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: I become somebody I don't recognize. She's fun. She's giggly.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: She dances. Vodka Abby's a great time. However....
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: She's daring.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: She needs to be stopped. I put myself on a
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: vodka cleanse in college because the last time I had
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: like an obscene amount of vodka, I blacked out for
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: the one and only time in my life. I've only
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: blacked out once.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: Only once.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: And it was on vodka at senior formal. And then also, I...
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: drunk texted one of my brother's friends that I had
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: a crush on something so egregious that I had to
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: lie and say I went to the hospital. I had
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: to lie and be like, oh, I was so drunk
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: I went to the hospital.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. That was the last time.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: That's the kind of person I become on vodka. Have
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: I had vodka since then?
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: Sure.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: But, like, in small doses.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: But I don't consume vodka. I'll sip on vodka. I'll
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: have a neutral.
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: I was going to say, like, because over the tailgate, neutrals,
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: that won't do it.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: No.
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: That's not enough.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: One neutral, it's fine.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: Four neutrals. That's a different story.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: So I was consuming vodka yesterday because the other rule
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: I have for myself is you don't mix liquors because
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: that's the other thing. That'll get me sick. So yesterday
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: at the Bud Light tailgate that we just talked about,
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: I got bamboozled into having... Do you need to change something?
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: No, I'm just looking at the time.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: I got boozled, literally, I got boozled by John Senning
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: into drinking vodka.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: Gotcha.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: So John Senning is one of the hosts on 1025
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: The Bone. John Senning... Brought a massive cooler of his
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: own drinks. And so I guess the sponsor for the tailgate,
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: Great Bay Distributors.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: Yes, we're pepping.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: They have this new drink. I don't know if it's
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: unreleased or if it's like low key, but it's like
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: a Gatorade drink. He's like, it's an electrolyte drink. And
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: I go, he goes, do you want one? And I
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: was like, sure. I'm freaking sweating my balls off.
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: I love some electrolytes.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: And he probably did mention that there was vodka in it.
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: But all I heard was electrolyte drink. And I was
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: so dehydrated. I was like, give it to me. So
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: I start drinking it and I start to feel vodka
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: Abby come out and I go, Oh, there's, there's vodka
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: in this.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: I got bamboozled into this. And so now that I've
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: started drinking vodka as somebody who was planning to go
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: to several sporting events that day from the Bucks game
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: to the Bucks tailgate to the lightning game, I now
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: have to stick with vodka for the rest of the day.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: A hundred percent committed.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: So I'm committed to vodka. The problem is, is I
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: was in the mood to be drunk yesterday.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: So when we went to the lightning game where there
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: was an open bar, cause we had club seats. Um,
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: I started schmacking down vodka diet cokes like it was nothing.
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: Especially when the vibe is just flowing, like everything's hitting,
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: oh my god.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: Tori and I were having so much fun yesterday we
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: were nobody was having more fun at.
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: The lightning game not even the players we.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: Were dancing we were giggling we were taking photos all
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: this to say is I don't know if it was
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: some of the conversations that we were having or just
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: the vodka gremlin that was coming out but I was like.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: Need to text somebody oh it's that drunk courage.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: Um and so a guy that i met and we
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: never hooked up we like we had kind of hooked
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: up we didn't really hook up we had a drunken
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: make out.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: All right there it is um what a place.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: And i was like i think i'm gonna text him
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: But the problem is, the thing is about vodka me
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: is I know this about myself. I know that vodka
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: is the only thing that will get me to drunk
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: text somebody because normally I'm sentient enough to go, don't
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then my friend Tori
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: was egging me on. She's like, you should text him.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: And I was like, fuck, I should text him.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: Honestly, I probably would have done the same thing as Tori. Like,
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: why not? You know, like, go ahead.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: No, but I'm like, you need to stop me. Like,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: it's a Sunday night and I'm clearly had several drinks.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: I can't consent to anything. Okay.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: That was a little fun.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: It's nobody's fault by my own.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: I knew what I was doing.
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: So I go to chat to you and I go,
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: What do I say to this man? Gosh, damn it.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: And ChachiBT said that I should text him.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: Did you tell Chat that you were tipsy before it?
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: I feel like Chat would be like, all right, you're
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: a little bit drunk, so I think this would be
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: the perfect text.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: God, I just got another text. So the whole point
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: of this is I've been avoiding my text messages all
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: morning because I don't want to know what I said.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: Or I don't want to know if he texted me back.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm more scared of, him texting
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: me back or him not texting me back.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, I can't wait to see what you said.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: So I'll tell you what I texted. So let me
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: go to my chat.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: Chat's like, hey, girl, you're feeling really good. You had
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: vodka today.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: And honestly, understandable.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: You should so text him. He would love a text
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: from you a little tipsy.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: Let me see. You know how it'll organize it into titles? Yes.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Here's what my current ChatGPT lineup says, because I use
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: this also for my scripts for the show. It says,
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: Bucks Game Detailed Edition, Lightning Game Schedule, and then under
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: that it goes, Hookup Advice for Old Flame! Under that,
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: NHL Game Duration.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Oh my lord.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: So, oh my god, I'm so embarrassed. It was the
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: first thing I thought about when I woke up. I
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: was like, fuck, what did I do?
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: What's so good about this, too, is like, it's not
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: even like it was a one-off, like, I'm gonna just
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: text him really quick. You're literally taking the steps of like,
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna go to chat. We're gonna pick the perfect prompt.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: Then I'm gonna still text him. You had so many
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: opportunities to stop yourself.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: There were several lines of defense. Oh my god, I'm
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: so embarrassed. I hate that we're reliving this right now
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: while I'm sober.
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: You know what? I'm right there with you. I feel
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: so much better that I got it off my chest,
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: so you might too.
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: And the worst part is it's 9.30 at night.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: It's not even like 2am.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Literally 9.30.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: Shows you're getting older.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: Yesterday, 9.31 p.m. God, I hate this! I'm going to
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: read for you verbatim what Chet said. If you genuinely
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: want to reopen that door, M-Dash, not just collect validation,
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: reply to the story with something lightly provocative. Not a
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: full confession. So then, this is what Chet told me
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: to say. You're looking annoyingly good.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Annoyingly good?
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: What the f- Chet! Then let him do some work.
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: Before you meet up, decide whether you're actually okay with
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: only being a hookup. Old flames can make casual sex
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: feel emotionally uncomplicated right up until it isn't. And then
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: I said, what's something more moderate I can say? And
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: then it said reply with, okay, I see you. It's
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: flirty enough to open the door, but moderate enough that
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: you can pretend you were simply acknowledging a good post
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: if he doesn't match his energy. Do you want to
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: know what the message is right under this?
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: How do I unsend an iMessage? Wait, that's really fucking funny.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: I need to send him the screenshot. Wait, that's really funny.
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, Jesus.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: Press and hold the message bubble, then tap undo send.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: You only have two minutes after sending it. If that
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: option is gone, you can still tap edit within 15 minutes,
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: but you can't fully unsend it. This is objectively the
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: funniest thing I've ever messaged chat. Okay, so it's been
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: longer than 15 minutes. What do I do? Oh, no!
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: What do I do? Chad said, leave it alone. OK,
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: I see you as genuinely mild, flirty, but not embarrassing
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: or overly forward. Sending a cleanup text would make it
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: feel like a bigger deal than it is. Put your
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: phone down and let him decide whether to pick up
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: the invitation. Do not double text tonight.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: At least Chad's looking out.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: So then I sent a screenshot of what I sent.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: And then I said, here's what I said. I want
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: to amend it. Oh, he said. And then Chad said, OK,
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: seen it in context. In bold letters, do not amend it. Yes,
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: it's bolder than, okay, I see you, especially after a
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: month of no contact, but it's confident and complimentary and
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: clearly opens the door. That's what you wanted. A follow-up like, lol, sorry,
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: would only make you look nervous.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: Let it sit.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: If you absolutely cannot resist, the only acceptable add-on is, respectfully,
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: of course. But my actual vote is, in bold letters,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: send nothing else.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: Stand on your ground, girl.
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: And that's it.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: I'm so embarrassed. I'm so embarrassed, Scotty.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: I want to know. He's had to respond. Well, actually,
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: I don't know, because it actually hasn't even been 12
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: hours since you've sent this message.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: He didn't respond before I went to bed. So he
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: must have either been pretending to be asleep or. He's
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: probably asleep.
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: I would hope.
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: God, Scotty, I'm so embarrassed.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: So you said. OK, so I think it's time for
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: you to actually open your phone. What did you send
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: and what did you say back?
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: Scotty, I can't do that.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: You have to. You literally have to. You gotta stand
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: on ground.
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: Will you- Okay, here's the thing. I want to give
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: you my phone so you can see if he responded.
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: But I also am terrified of, like, what other text
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: messages lie in there.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: I am too, because as much as you call me
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: a freak, I don't need to know.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: No, there's nothing freaky in there, but, like, I don't know. Like,
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: I'm currently in, like, a beef with my family right now.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: You know, I just, like, don't know- I'm not gonna
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: open another chat.
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: Well, I don't know. You just- I don't know. I
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: mean- Okay, so what if I tell you his name,
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: and then I'm going to hold it from far away,
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: and you tell me if he responded. But I also, like,
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: my stomach is gurgling. I'm also worried I might, like,
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: crap my pants.
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. There's a lot happening. Vodka yesterday. Okay,
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: open up your messages.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: Scotty, I'm so nervous.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: Okay, let's see where this goes. Okay.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: Scotty, I'm nervous.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: I'm so ready for this scene.
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: Okay, wait. I need to tell you. Hang on. Take
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: your microphone. Okay, okay. I'm doing this for the pod.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: I'm doing this for our listeners. This is our job.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: Hey, otherwise, I literally, honestly, I thought about deleting iMessages
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: off my phone.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: You can't delete your iMessages.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: Yes, I can.
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: Literally how you communicate with the world.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna open it. God, fuck, I'm so nervous.
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, here we go.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: Did he respond? Did he respond? Fuck, did he respond?
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: He responded. He responded! He responded! Oh, my God. No! God, please, no! Well, here's,
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: it's all, I mean, gosh, okay, so it was like,
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: we're less than 12 hours. Did you see what he said?
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: I did.
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: Do you want, no, was it bad, is it bad?
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: No, no, it's not bad. No, it's good. It's good,
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: you should look at it.
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: I don't want to see it.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: I think you want to see it. I think actually
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: you're really going to enjoy seeing it.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: Did he call me out for being drunk?
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: No, not at least that I saw. I don't know
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: how many he said. Did he ask me to come over? Oh,
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: my God. What if he didn't? No, I did not
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: see that. No, he said it felt like he said
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: something very flirty back. I will say. I will say, like,
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: what his response was felt flirty.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: Who else do I have text messages from other than Okta?
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: Oh, honestly, I was trying not to get in your business.
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: I was not looking. Well, I appreciate that.
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm looking for one name. You're better
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: than me.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: I would have been looking.
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: He's like, why am I still looking? I think you
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: should look right now.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: No, I can't do that.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: I think you're going to feel really good about it.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: Because it's kind of cute what he responded with. I
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: say open your phone, look at it. I think you'll
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: like the response.
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: How about you read it for me?
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Okay. Yeah, yeah. I'm literally going to crawl out of
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: my skin. It'd be one thing if I was like, okay,
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go over now.
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: I think he's into it, based off of what I said.
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: Of course he's into it. I know he's into it.
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: That's the problem. I'm just so embarrassed. You know what
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: I'm going to do?
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: No.
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to delete it, and I'm going to
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: pretend like it never happened.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: Absolutely not.
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: I'm going to delete his number.
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: You just struck a match. We got heat here.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I'm not into it.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know, sometimes you just every now and
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: then need a... You know, another make out, you know,
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: in a bed.
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: I know. I think I'm just like really lonely.
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: This is, you know, I've heard so many friends say
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: every now and then you just need to bring somebody
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: back in, somebody you know, slightly comfortable with, just to
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: get things flowing again. You know, it's healthy.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: No, I need to join a convent.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: Open your phone and read the message. You're going to
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: like it. It's cute.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: You guys, the shit that I do for you. Oh, wait.
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: We have a group chat. Morning, guys. I won't be
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: in the cluster meeting. Oh, no. Jenna's cat has an emergency.
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: That's so sad.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: That is sad. Sorry, you guys.
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: I'm stalling. Yeah. Okay.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: Open your message.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: Okay. Oh, my God. Scotty, I can't do it.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's longer than I thought it was.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: Okay. Fuck!
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: Wait a second. Can you?
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: Okay. Okay.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: I love how long it's been between your last messages.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Alright.
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: You ready? Did you admit what text you went with?
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: Did you admit what text you went with from chat? The,
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: you look annoyingly good. Okay, do you want to start
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: with what time you responded with? Yeah.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: What time did you respond?
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: He responded. It's like 2 a.m. 1220 a.m.
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: That's so funny.
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: So I'm just going to tell you what he said.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: No, Scott. I'm so embarrassed.
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: So at 934 p.m.
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: I'm so embarrassed.
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: I can't. You look annoyingly good.
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: How long is it?
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: One, two, three, four, five. Five words back.
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: Five words you said it was long you said it
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: was long.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: I thought i saw something but that was the message
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: about okay um but it's super cute beck okay just
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: okay it's not that cute.
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: No fuck you hyped it up and then you.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: Know i know because i don't want to leave you
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: too on all.
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: Right no no no okay here's what i want you
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: to do because this is what i normally do with
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: chat gbt so you're gonna be my chat gbt right
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: now okay do you see me i'm like shaking oh
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: yeah I don't know if it's the caffeine or just
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: the fact that I really have to shit my pants.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: Right now Yeah, probably a little bit of all of
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: it The vodka has now worked its way through your
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: system I'm having a heart attack That would be so
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: bad I don't know CPR, so please.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Do not pass out So what I normally do when
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: I'm nervous about like a text message or an email
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: is I'll screenshot it to chat and I'll be like,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: can you just like summarize it to me in like
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: a really, really nice way and like a way that
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: just like softens it for me.
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: It's soft, like it's flirty right back.
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: No, I'm so embarrassed.
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: Not when you've got good flirtatious energy going like this.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: Whatever, just fucking tell me what he said.
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: .
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: No, no, no,
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: don't do it, don't do it. Okay, no, give me
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: the TLDR.
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: It's not that bad.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: Give me the TLDR. Okay. No, no, no, just summarize it.
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: What's the vibe? What's happening?
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: He's flirting right back. He's shooting it right back. He's
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: kind of being like, it's cheeky.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: Fuck.
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: Okay, just go.
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: I'm so embarrassed.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: All right, so Abby says, You look annoyingly good.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: Don't do it. I can't. I'm not listening.
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: At 1220.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: Okay. Wait, so what did you say? No, don't do it.
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: Okay. He says. Okay, what do you say? What do
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: you say? Almost feels like a compliment.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: That is good.
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: That is good. At 1220 AM.
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: I'm just not going to respond to it.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: No, you have to respond.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: I can't.
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, now it's actually too late because now it's
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: in the morning. Now it's weird. Now it's like there's.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: It's too weird.
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: Also, I was asleep.
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't know where you go from that because
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: now it's a whole new day.
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: I think the best thing for me to do is
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: just not say anything. No, give me my phone.
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: Okay. Do not delete the text. Keep the thread with them.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's so funny. You know what my other messages were?
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I have to check my messages because
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: so many people are hitting me up. I got a
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: Bank of America alert for my period tracking app.
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: Oh, fantastic.
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: And then my CMG passport verification code.
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: Other very important things.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: So I can log into my fucking email. And then
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: Jenna saying she has a problem with her cat.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: I did see that. But where do you go now
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: with that message? Nowhere.
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: I didn't want to hook up with him. I think
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: I was just lonely last night.
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: I mean, sometimes you just need a subpar hookup. Just,
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: you know.
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: A subpar hookup.
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: You do! Like, sometimes you're just like, alright. I feel bad.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: He's gonna hear this. I'm gonna have to edit so
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: much of this because I feel bad now. Yeah, you
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: know what?
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: You do what you need to do in the private.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: I don't need to know your, uh... I feel like
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: I'm not the only freak up in here.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: Radio people are freaky. Why was that a hand gesture?
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: That was not a hand gesture.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: What was that?
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: No, no, no. That was me just reaching over to
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: my phone. That was not a hand gesture.
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: You were like, you were like.
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no.
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: You're pointing to me in my fucking potato sack Amazon outfit.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: It looks good. You're fine. You're fine. You should send
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: him a pic back. Be like, compliments for me.
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to send back and be like, I
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: need to not drink vodka. I'm just not going to
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: say anything, I think. Damn.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: I wonder how many of those, like, I'm straightening my hair.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: Flirty moments people have with people. It's just flirty online.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: It's just flirty in text every now and then. You
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: get just drunk enough, but then it never leads.
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I don't. I'm not a booty call girl.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: But there's nothing wrong with being a booty call.
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: No, no, no. I'm not like booty call shaman. I'm
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: not booty shaman. But it's funny. The last time I
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: drunk texted a guy was literally in college. And I
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: made a pact with myself. I was so embarrassed that
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: I literally said I went to the hospital. Like that's
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: how humiliated I was. I was drinking vodka. I was
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: at Social 28. Or not Social 28. Where was I?
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: I was at Social, the bar in Gainesville. And I
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: got so drunk on vodka sodas that I went back
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: to my dorm and I vomited everywhere. And I texted
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: my brother's friend and I think I confessed how much
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: in love I was with him. And then I had
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: to walk down the aisle with him at my brother's wedding!
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: I can't remember if that was him or the other guy.
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: But he was there.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: But they were both at my brother's wedding.
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: They were definitely there. They were both at my brother's wedding.
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: Definitely there. You guys, the lore for my brother's wedding.
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: You guys are going to love my memoir in 50 years.
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, there you go. Start writing it now. What you
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: said there is very tame. So I think that's actually fun.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: Unfortunately, like I need a mental connection.
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah. To be naked with someone. And I was also
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: having this long convoluted conversation with Tori, my friend who
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: was at the game with me last night. I'm going
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: to sit down. No, I'm going to stand up. The
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: video of this is so funny. I'm going to have
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: to send him the podcast clip and be like.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, just get right to it. Don't even wait for
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: it to be sent to him.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to leave this here.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: This explains everything.
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: This explains everything. No, he can never hear us, but
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: he will. What was I talking about? What was I
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: talking about? I don't know what I was talking about.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: I was talking about my friend, um, Tori.
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: Oh, you guys are having a deep conversation about something.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: We went on like a three hour walk on Saturday
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: and we were talking about some of our shared history
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: with religion. And I confessed something that I didn't really
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: know was living deep down within me. So I didn't
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: make a lot of mistakes really until I went to college.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: And then I'm such a controlled person. Like I'm just
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: very disciplined. Um, usually that like when, for example, I
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: drunk texted my brother's friend and threw up, I was like, okay,
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: no more vodka, no more drunk texting.
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: Like that's my rule. Control it.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: And I just, I didn't spend a lot of my
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: youth making mistakes. I think cause a, I'm just very
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: like hypervigilant about life in general. But B, I think
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: a lot of my upbringing was just constantly trying to
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: be like good in the eyes of God. And I
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: just didn't really do anything to fuck up. Yeah. And
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: I think I was a little drunk and like, kind
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: of having like a vodka moment, because the vodka gremlin
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: comes out. And I was like, I just kind of
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: want to do something stupid. Yes. I just want to
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: kind of do something weird and stupid that I don't
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: feel like I'm going to feel guilty about. And I
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: think if I'm going to ever do it, it's going
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: to be right now.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: But I think it is like, that's such an interesting thought,
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: because it is okay to fuck up. Like, it's actually...
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: some of us do it way early. Like, I did
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: a lot of F it up when I was way
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: too young.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: Way too young.
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: And luckily, it helped me later. Like, I don't regret it,
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: but I do think, like, F up every now and then. Like,
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: there's no part of the perfect process. Like, it gives
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: you perspective, lessons, crazy stories. But, The good thing is,
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: this sounds so weird, but you have plenty of time
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: to still fuck up.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: I know, but now I'm 29.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's still okay, though.
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: It's not cute to fuck up when you're 29. It's
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: cute when you're 19. Like, I can look back and go, ha-ha,
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: isn't it crazy that I confessed my love for my
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: brother's friend when I was 19? If I did that now,
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: you'd be like, okay, girl, like, we got to send
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: you to rehab.
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: Ah, no, I don't think so. I think that's you're
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: being hard on yourself for where you need to be
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: at 29. Well, yeah.
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: I mean, easy for you to say, Mr. I'm about
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: to get married and have kids and buy a house. Like,
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: it's totally fine to fuck up.
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: But I did a lot of fucking up, though. Like,
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: a lot of fucking up.
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: I know. And so I think I just keep myself
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: on a very tight leash. And I think the farther
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: and farther I get from religion, not that I want
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: to be far from my religion. That was the whole
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: point of my conversation. conversation with Tori is that I
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: miss all the bullshit that people usually hate about religion.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: Like I miss going to church and like being around
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: other people and like having things to talk about. Whereas
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: she doesn't miss that. She like just loves having a
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: relationship with God. And I'm like, I, that's great too.
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: But I also like, don't know if God's real. I
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: have just really, really drifted super, super far from being Christian.
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: And I think the farther I get from that, just
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: like the less pressure I put on myself. I think
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: I've only... just started to resent religion's effect on my life.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: Like I've never felt any type of way, but I
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: don't have any weird trauma over, like I love being
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: a part of the church, all the things. And I
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: think I'm getting to the age where I'm like, you know,
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: did I really base my entire life off of something
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: that I don't even really believe in anymore? You know
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: what I mean? And like, this is the, I'm like,
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: I am who I am today because of that. But like,
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: would my life have been better without it? Is it
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: better because of it? Now I don't need it anymore.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure you could look back and be like,
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: I literally held myself back from doing this, this, this
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: because of how involved I was with religion in general.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: What would you say or in your mind or where
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: you go? what would you say would happen for fuck ups?
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Like if you did fuck up, like what does your
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: mind go for that?
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: Well, like I don't like feeling like this right now,
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: like super embarrassed and like, Oh my God, I knew
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: it was fun in the moment. You know what I mean?
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: But like now I have to, I'm like very much
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: in the camp of living in reality. Like we're living
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: in sober reality right now where like I'm now dealing
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: with the consequences of my actions last night. And I
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: don't like, Kind of like me and you with our fitness.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: I like to work out really, really hard so I
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: can enjoy a healthy body and feeling good in my life.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: And so I don't like to fuck up in that
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: area because I like to enjoy my life in that way.
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: And so I feel like I fucked up last night
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: and now I feel like... I'm just like the slutty
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: girl that texted this random man. I don't know. Yeah, yeah.
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: But I think what's valid is, one, the feelings are,
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: but also, too, to remind yourself, like, when you look
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: at it in perspective of, wait a second, it's not
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: even that big of a deal. That's not a message.
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: It's not.
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: That's not a big deal. It's actually, it's fun. Like,
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: those are the things of life that bring joy of, like,
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: it's a funny moment. Nobody got hurt. Nobody's offended. Everyone's cool. Like,
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: it's just fun being flirty. Like, when we look at
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: it in actual, like, reality. Because our mind like, that's
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: literally how I felt, like, going up to Warren Sapp
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: and being like, I'm going to tell him. I'm going
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: to tell him. I'm going to tell him. I look
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: like a wiener. Okay. I feel like shit. But then
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: I'm like, why I was able to calm down is like,
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: you didn't look like a wiener. I didn't look like
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: a wiener. You looked like a weenie.
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: Weenie.
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, you know what?
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: Who cares?
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: The only person that cares is me. And if I
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: could let that go, then... I guess I'm fine.
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And like, I think we're so hard on ourselves
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: because we don't want to be the person that's doing
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: these little mistakes or I have all my ducks in
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: a row and everything's crossed, but it's okay not to.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: And it's like, you see, like this is a good
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: example of something that's nothing bad is going to happen
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: from this. No, I know.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: And so I think I also was mentally thinking, and
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: this is just kind of like the sad part of
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: this too, is I think I've always just kind of
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: had like this exciting hope that like at some point
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: in my twenties, I'm going to meet somebody and like,
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: then I'll get to be in a relationship and have like,
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm not going to want like a bunch
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: of like just random hookups or whatever. And I've gotten
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: to this point where I'm now in my late 20s.
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: I'm like, well, no one's coming. Literally.
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: So I might as well just be if I'm not
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: going to be in a relationship, maybe I should just
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: be a whore.
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: That's one extreme to the other. Do you know what
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: I mean? I do.
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I'm trying to say? If I'm
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: going to be single for the next... 50, 60 years.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean? I might as well just say,
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: fuck it. Like, I should be taking what I can get.
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: And maybe what I can get, which is so sad,
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: is literally some random dude. You know what I mean?
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: You do what you want. It's your life. Take that
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: as you want it. But also travel, new adventures, new experiences.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you're like, I don't want to do that because
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: I want to wait for the person to go do
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: it with. Yeah. But your other person that you're waiting for, hypothetically,
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: they're doing that thing too. And if you keep waiting
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: for that person, you're going to miss the youth that
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: we have now. You're going to miss the opportunities to
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: have a crazy drunken night out with the girls, to
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: send a couple random silly text messages, to have a
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: couple silly makeouts that are just like, it's innocent. Nobody
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: got hurt. You didn't do anything stupid. And it's fun.
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: And we're able to take that judgment off of ourselves.
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: We realize, wait a second, that's just the fun part
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: of life. I'm allowed to have those fun experiences. And
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: I think what it really comes down to is you're
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: just saying yes to life in that way. Yeah. I'm
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: not going to put off everything. I'm just going to
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: live life. And if I feel like doing it, if
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: I want to have this experience, I'm going to have it.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: The person I'm going to be with won't be upset
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: that I had a trip to, who knows, Australia when
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: I was in my 20s because I didn't wait for
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: him to go on our honeymoon in Australia. No, because
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: they're doing it too right now. That's the best part.
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: Then you come back together, you talk about your shared experiences,
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: and then it's even cooler to find things that you
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: still haven't done that you now get to do together.
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: But you don't want to put off things, because you
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: don't know. Who the hell knows what's going to happen tomorrow?
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: Do you know? I don't.
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't hit it by a car.
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: Literally, though. Literally. So why are we going to put
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: off things that could bring a little bit of joy,
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: a little bit of silliness?
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: No, I know. And also, I'm just not really into
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: random hookups, so this isn't some puritanical, like, oh. I'm
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: trying not to hook up with people. It's more of
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: just like, I don't really even think I would enjoy
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: like being casual with somebody.
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: No. Yeah. I was never good at that.
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: But I, but last night I was like, fuck it.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: Maybe I would, maybe 30 year old me would like
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: to just fuck a bunch of randos. Let's find out.
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: Well, you know, you do what you want. But maybe
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: it's been, like, so... Weird word, but I'm going to
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: use it just because I'm talking flow. Pent up. Pent
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: up of, like, just wanting to... Not sexual energy. That's
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: not exactly.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: But that's fair.
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: Like, yeah, you just want to have all these experiences. Like,
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: fuck it. Like, I want to do this. I have
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: a desire to do this. I'm going to do this. Obviously,
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: wherever that takes you.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: I know, but usually men open their mouth, and then
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: I'm like... I don't want to have sex with you.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the problem. And I can see how it's
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: harder for women to want to do it because men
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: are just interesting creatures. And you don't want to just...
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: You got to be careful, of course.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: They got diseases.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: They got diseases. They got trust. They got... They're weird.
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: They have crazy ex-girlfriends who will find you on Facebook
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: Messenger and start chatting you up and yelling at you
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: for going on a date with them. Mm-hmm.
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: Did that happen to you?
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it did. Freshman year of college.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: Some girl saw me in my dorm with this dude
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: I was going on a date function with. And she goes,
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: and he has a really small penis.
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: Damn.
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: It was like, she messaged me at like 3 p.m.
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: And then she did exactly what I would do later
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: in college. I'm so sorry. I was so drunk. I
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: was like, no, you weren't, girl. This was, like, at noon.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not drunk at noon. You just wanted to
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: get back at him and now confront me.
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she was pissed. Yeah. And I was like, I
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: don't even like this guy that much. Like, this was
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: a random setup.
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: But maybe, you know, I'm trying to think how you
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: can just do this in your life. Like, this sounds
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: so weird. Like, podcast veg, don't judge here. But, like,
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: maybe it is more like vodka nights out of just, like.
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: I need to be drinking more vodka.
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: No, no, but, like, just, like, letting loose, having fun,
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: doing a random ass, like, I don't know. Did you
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: do that walk on Saturday after the shuffleboard event? Before it.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: Before shuffleboard. Oh, wow. Oh, wait, no, no, wait. Was
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: shuffleboard Friday or Saturday? Saturday. We did it Saturday morning.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: Oh, very nice. Yeah, yeah.
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: So, I mean, my therapist said that. She was like,
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: you're very controlled. She's like, have you thought about just
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: like having more fun or like prioritizing fun? And so
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: that's what I've been trying to say yes to. Where
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: I've just kind of been like, work isn't the most
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: important thing in my life anymore. So I'm just kind
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: of like, I've just never been like, I always have
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: something on my plate that I'm doing. I'm always doing
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: a podcast. I'm always building something. And I think I
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: just kind of like, don't my career kind of falling
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: apart in the last year. I just kind of just like,
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: I don't give a fuck anymore. I just want to
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: have fun. I want to sleep with randos and I
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: want to get day drunk on a Sunday. Just all the,
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: all things I never do. Like, I feel like I'm
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: having my eat, pray, love moment, except instead of talking
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: to Buddha in China, it's like me sending a drunk text. Yeah.
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: Well, like just unwinding a little bit, like, you know,
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: cause I could relate to that. I remember when I
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: was first getting into this business, I remember like I
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: wanted to work on holidays and I wanted to work
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: through spring breaks and I didn't want to even go
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: to graduation. And literally the host that I was working with,
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: they're like, Absolutely not.
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: That's no way to live.
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: You need to go and literally have the crazy ass
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: drunk night and then come into the next morning and
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: then you need to have the F ups. And they
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: had a whole thing when I was single in my,
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: like before they were literally like coaching me to be like,
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: you need to be single and go and just talk
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: to random people and flirt and have random hookups. And
• 45:19
  Speaker 2: I was like, what? Like, yes, you need to get
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: that out of your system. So all of these things
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: that you like want to have experiences with, you're not
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: like penting it up. And then just all of a
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: sudden you get let's say with somebody you're in this
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: relationship for 10 years and you're like, I should have
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: done all these things. And now it's not happening. Go
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: live your life. Go unwind a little bit. Cause also
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: as much as we want to control, we have no control. Yeah.
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: That's the crazy, like the career is a great example.
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: You work so hard to only have things that are
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: not in your control happen. I know. You're like, I
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: can't do anything about that. Job change.
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: I know. It makes you just, it makes you not
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: want to work. Cause I'm like, well, What am I
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: working hard for? Like, really, what's the end goal? You know,
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: if everything can just go away in an instant.
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: It's like, what do you want to have happen with that?
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: So I tell people with money, I'm like, yes, I
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: want to make money, but for what? Like, that's the point. Like, yeah,
• 46:11
  Speaker 2: I want to build a great career, but for what?
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: It's not just to have a title, because the title
• 46:15
  Speaker 2: could be taken. In a second. Yeah.
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: And to be fair, so can the money.
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: So what is actually happening? What do you actually want
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: to have happen with it? Or what is the life
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: that you want to have that you could actually start
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: doing right now? I don't know.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: Just dry humping a bunch of dudes.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: Dry humping some dudes.
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, and the other thing is, oh, do you want
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: to hear us? Because I kind of soft launched on
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: beefing with my family. I finally got to cover up
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: the ring cameras. I was like, if I'm ever going
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: to do it, it's right now.
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: They'll never know who's coming over.
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: Rebellious Abby's coming out.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: I know. I think I'm just going to be a whore.
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: Well, I don't know about that.
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: My idea of being a whore is just having a
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: random make out in Soho.
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: But you should, though. Like as long, I don't know.
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: You can't really, I don't know. You should though.
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: But I like, I want to want to do it.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? Like don't just do it
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: to do it to say that you did it.
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It's not really in my, or maybe it is
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: maybe 30 year old Abby. She's a big old slut. Slut, slut, slut, slut, slut.
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: Hey, sleut it up. There's nothing so bad about being
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: a sleut. What are the other girls in your life
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: say about this?
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: Um, well of course Tori was egging me on and
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: I was like, bitch, what are you doing?
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: Hell yeah. That's girlhood right there.
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: I mean, I have a lot of like wild and
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: crazy friends who, you know, they're, They've just always been
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: more chill about the romance department. I'm just not someone
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: that can, like, randomly just, like, hook up with someone. Yeah.
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: Except last night. That's easy. I'm not that person.
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: Except when there's enough vodka. You're like, wait a second.
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: F all rules. That's the crazy thing with alcohol, though,
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: because that literally drops that part of your brain that's like, rules? Nah.
• 47:41
  Speaker 2: Doesn't apply to me. As long as it's done safely. And,
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: of course, like, that's where it's hard. Because you do, like,
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: every now and then, let's say, hypothetically, like, you know what?
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: I am going to go have a random hookup. Well,
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Guys are so untrustworthy.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Like, it's, ah.
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: No, I know. How do you pick?
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: No, literally.
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: Like, I don't trust men.
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: Like, you've got to be so, so careful. But at
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: the same time, when the opportunity strikes and it's something
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: you want and you can't trust, take it.
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: Live it.
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: Unwind it. Today's the only day that matters. F around
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: and find out.
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: I'm so embarrassed. Well. Okay, we have to go to
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: the sales meeting. All right.
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: Let's go F around and find out in the sales meeting. Ah,
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: a week full. Of new adventures. And I think our
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: new rebellious Abby is on the rise.
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: Slut!
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: She's not a slut. Leave her alone. She's fun.