Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #73 Tillie's Mum Katrina Gorry: From Solo IVF to Sharing Motherhood and Growing Their Family

Transcript

#73 Tillie's Mum Katrina Gorry: From Solo IVF to Sharing Motherhood and Growing Their Family · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Ash.
• 0:00
  Speaker 2: We are here to give the listeners cheeky little bonus episode. Today.
• 0:05
  Speaker 3: Oh I love that and Matt. Today we have none
• 0:08
  Speaker 3: other the Matilda superstar Katrina Gory. I'm super excited for
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: this one.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: How the hell did you get her details?
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Never you mind?
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: How'd you do? Honestly?
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: Tell me on the weasel schmooze my schmooth man. All
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: I did was I reached out to her. I played
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: our case. I played what we have.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Here on Instagram or Instagram is what's your opening line?
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Sup? One p or two three piece soup up.
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: I just went in with an honest approach to asking
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: someone if they would love to jump on and have
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: a yarn about parenting.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: And she so happens to have a very unique story.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: You've done well. Katrina or she's also known as Minni,
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: is joining us all the way from Sweden.
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: Katrina is the doting mother to three year old Harp
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: who you may remember Matt from the World Cup that
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: was in Australia in two thousand and three, which captivated
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: the nation. It was a pivotal moment in Australian sport
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: and they have changed the game forever. Got to be
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: a part of it, So I'm pumped for this one.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: I love it when you get passionate about sport.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Passionate.
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: I just love sport. We also talk about how she
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: became pregnant with Harper, which is a little bit left
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: of field.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: It is very left of field. It's an IVF journey,
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: but it's unique in that she was a single parent
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: and that process took place over in Norway. But now
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: her partner Clara, they are expecting their second baby any
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: second now. She may or may not give birth in
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: the podcast episode, I don't want to give it away.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: I got to tease it just in case it happened.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: You'll see what happens. She doesn't give birth in the
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: episode in case I don't want to just manage expectations. Here,
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: welcome back to two doting dads and one doting mum.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: I'm Maddie, j I'm Ash.
• 2:14
  Speaker 4: I'm known as Harper's mum, but also Katrina Gory very good.
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: This is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good,
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: the bad, and the relatable. And if you have come
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: wanting any advice, stop right now.
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: Actually, whenever we have a guess, we get some accidental advice.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: And I feel like Katrina, you've had a really insane
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: parenting journey. So I feel like you will give us
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: some advice today.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Let's hope.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: So, but no pressure.
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Look, I don't know about that. I don't know
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: about that. She's alive.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: That's the mazing, perfect, perfect Katrina. If we go back
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: to when you were a young kid, when you were
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: beginning your career as a ballet dancer, it was a
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: short lived career. Do you remember how many lessons you had?
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: This is before you started playing football.
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, look, probably about none. You wouldn't get me in
• 3:05
  Speaker 4: the dress or the shoes or anything else.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: I thought your mom forced you into lessons.
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, she probably did, but I probably didn't go, or
• 3:13
  Speaker 4: I went and hit in the toilet, or just wasn't
• 3:15
  Speaker 4: for you. Maybe I stood on the floor at one point.
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: But yeah, I've just raised up from my memory.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: And you've got quite a few siblings. Can you just
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: run us through how many siblings you've got?
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: I do so. I have a sister, three brothers, three
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: step brothers, and a half brother.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: Wow, must have been a lively household.
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: Yes, it was pretty crazy, but we had a good childhood.
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: But yeah, always someone to muck around with. Always someone
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: to beat up or have a bit of a chuckle with.
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: But no, it was yeah, we had a great childhood.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: It was your brothers that got you into playing football
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: or soccer. For those wonderings. Did they love that their
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: little sister was wanting to follow in their footsteps?
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: I think bits and pieces. I hated when I beat them,
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: they hated when I probably you know, progressed a bit
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: more than what they did. But they probably know that
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: they taught me everything I knew about football and it
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: made me the player that I was, So I think
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: they take a bit of responsibility for that. I think.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: And outside of you know, playing football soccer at a
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: young age, what sort of kid were you? Would you say?
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: Were you a troublemaker? Were you you follow all the rules?
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Were you the class clown? Where did you fee?
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: Was there was a big side something, something's happened.
• 4:35
  Speaker 4: I definitely wasn't a goodie two issues that was yeah,
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  Speaker 4: I was probably out of all the kids, probably one
• 4:42
  Speaker 4: of the bad ones, A bit of a class clown,
• 4:45
  Speaker 4: would like to push boundaries, a bit hated being told
• 4:48
  Speaker 4: what to do.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: How many times did you get separated from your friends
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: in the classroom?
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: We probably weren't even allowed to sit together to start this.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: Do you remember was there a was there a moment
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: where you realized that you were actually getting a lot
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: better than the rest of your brothers playing football?
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, probably. I mean when I was a teenager,
• 5:07
  Speaker 4: I got selected for quite a few teams. Obviously it's
• 5:11
  Speaker 4: a bit harder for the boys, but they kind of
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: fell out of love with the game. My older brothers
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: did anyway, and so I guess I still loved it
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: a bit more than they did and kept on progressing.
• 5:22
  Speaker 4: And I actually got kicked out of one of my
• 5:24
  Speaker 4: teams because I had a bad attitude. So I think
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: that kind of made me want to, you know, work
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: a bit harder and yeah, be a bit better.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: When you look back, do you think you did have
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: a bad attitude or were you hard done by?
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: No? I mean probably. But I was like thirteen, so
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: I made it into the QAS team and it's with like,
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: I mean, most of them were national team players. So
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: between twenty and thirty years old and obviously thirteen year old,
• 5:53
  Speaker 4: I didn't know how to act. Yeah, I didn't know
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: how to act. I didn't want football to be that serious.
• 5:58
  Speaker 4: I just wanted to have fun. That probably did have
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: a bad attitude, but I probably didn't know what it
• 6:03
  Speaker 4: meant to be a professional.
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: Football Every thirteen year old had a bad attitude.
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: Ye, let that one, I'm slide. Well, let that one's slide.
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: I think I think you probably weren't hard done by
• 6:14
  Speaker 3: your Probably they were probably trying to teach you a
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: bit of a lesson, like a life lesson, which is
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: but that's such a big age gap. I mean me,
• 6:21
  Speaker 3: growing up playing football or soccer, I would be a male.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: I would come up against teams and there would be
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: the odd female. I mean, you must look back now
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: and think that such a big shift. Were you playing
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: in teams as a kid, you know, as the lone
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: girl in the in the team?
• 6:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, my whole junior So I played up until I
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: was thirteen with the boys, and I loved it. I
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: thought it was most teams that I went to they
• 6:45
  Speaker 4: were really accepting when they saw that I could play.
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: They always had my back. If you know, one of
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: the opponents weren't very nice or was saying some pretty
• 6:53
  Speaker 4: harsh things. So that was really nice. And yeah, for
• 6:56
  Speaker 4: the most part, I was the only female. Pretty nice
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: to go back to my old club and see how
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: many you know, grassroots girls things there are now because
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: it's changed massively.
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: So who was your idol back then? Who did you
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: look up to?
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: Everyone asked me that. To be honest, I never really
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: watched football or anything like that. I'd say probably Kathy
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: Freeman out of anyone, just because of you know what
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: she did for Australia. But yeah, I didn't really what.
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: I still don't watch the English Premier League and I
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: live in London.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: Yea.
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: Literally, you know everyone's talking about the games and I
• 7:32
  Speaker 4: had no idea. I think they're talking about the women's games,
• 7:34
  Speaker 4: but no, I just never really watched it. It was
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: only when I got pregnant that I started watching more football.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: Do you do you think was it a coach, was
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: it you know, your mum? Or was it just maturity
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: that that shifted that bad attitude when you were thirteen?
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: It was probably, to be fair, getting kicked out of
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: the team. I think. You know, when something's taken away
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: from you really realize how much you actually wanted. And
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: I remember being in tears and just like feeling like
• 8:02
  Speaker 4: my world just being taken away. So I probably I
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: worked a bit harder and when I got another opportunity,
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: I tried to take it with both hands. So yeah,
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: it probably helped me in the long run, for.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Sure, there's that lesson learned.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: I was talking about it like, yeah, it obviously lit
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: a fire in your in your belly, and it's obviously
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: led to where you are now. But in those early
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: days where you were a professional football player, do you
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: remember what it was like getting that call that you're
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: getting accepted or getting getting asked to play for the
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: national team.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Do you remember that that moment.
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I was over in Canada, so it was my
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: first overseas team, semi pro team, and my coach at
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: the time had said that I'd been in the preliminary squad,
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: and then a couple of days later told me that
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: I'd made the squad, And yeah, I guess it was
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: just a pro a really proud moment. I remember calling
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: my mom. I was probably in tears. She was over
• 8:58
  Speaker 4: I think in France at the time, and quickly rebooked
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: their flights to come be with me in Japan to
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: watch me debut. I don't think I really touched the ball,
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: I just chase shadows, but it was still still a
• 9:11
  Speaker 4: special moment. For sure.
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: When your coach tells you, is it just like, oh,
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: and by the way, you've made the Australian squad, or
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: is it like did they make it a big deal?
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Do you think that it's about to come the news.
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, they made it a big deal because at
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: the time I was probably one of the only ones
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: in the team playing for their national team. So yeah,
• 9:33
  Speaker 4: the girls were super pumped for me, so he made
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: it pretty special with what he had. But yeah, it's
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: definitely a moment you'd never forget.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: And then how does it work with Like I always wondered,
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: when you get the news how you're going to play
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: for Australia, when do you start getting your kit.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: Do they ship it out to you? You've got to
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: go and get it.
• 9:54
  Speaker 4: As soon as you get into Kent. They've got like
• 9:57
  Speaker 4: a big kit room, so they give you stacks of
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: different shirts and shorts.
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: It must be like a childhood dream to go into
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: the kit room of the of like the national football
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: team and being like, you know, okay, we'll get to
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: pick whatever you want. It was all I suppose that
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: every kid who plays any sport would have that dream
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: of imagine that moment.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: I remember like going home when I was a kid
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: and I like put everything on before game day. Did
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: you have any sleep? Did you have anything like that
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: when you're like, they.
• 10:28
  Speaker 4: Don't let us even see our jerseys before we head
• 10:32
  Speaker 4: into the games, have a bunch of people sleeping in
• 10:36
  Speaker 4: them yet. No, but it was nice just even walking
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: around in you know, casual shirts that say have the
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: Australian and them on them and stuff like that. It's
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: definitely pretty special. But yeah, even more special to put
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: the jersey on for the first time for sure, females.
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: It's changed a lot now because like from what we
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: got back then to what we have now is just
• 10:58
  Speaker 4: completely different. Like I think I was still paying for
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: my own boots back then.
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: Oh wow, what?
• 11:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's only been in probably the last
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: couple of years that you'd find most national team players
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: are now fully sponsored. But yeah I was. I mean
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: I was finding it hard to find boots because my
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: shoes my feet are so small.
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: So what size shoe if you don't mind me asking?
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: Five relaxed?
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: Sorry? Wow.
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So it's only recently that they've actually started making
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: that women's boots so they go down to that size.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: So it is that because of yourself.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: Have you been pioneer?
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: I don't know if I can claim it, but I'm
• 11:41
  Speaker 4: sure a lot of girls are in my We don't
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: have the biggest feet, that's for sure. Yeah, yeah, I
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: take it. I called like myself and I said, look,
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: I need more some size.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: Do you remember back then, obviously female sport it's changed
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: so much. Football in Australia has changed so much since
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: the World Cup. Do you remember back then when you
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: were playing, Like, how many people would you get to
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: attend a game?
• 12:05
  Speaker 4: Oh? Probably like maybe four or five thousand. It wasn't
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: often that we even played in Australia to be fair,
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: let alone Yeah, in a big stadium or anything. I
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: think the first time we got twenty thousand, and it
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: was in Sydney and I think it might've been around
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: twenty fifteen.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: And what about when you were playing club level?
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: Oh, you'd get a few hundred in there maybe, Yeah,
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: for like.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: A Brisbane raw game. It seems crazy that.
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: I mean, now it's it's you know, it's very different,
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: but back then it's like what like that just a
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: few hundred people in such a big stadium like that
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: just seems crazy to me?
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: Is it a difficult adjustment then to playing in front
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: of not just hundreds, but then thousands of people.
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: No, it's incredible. Like singing the national anthem with so
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: many people, and like just hearing the atmosphere constantly throughout
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: the game is just Yeah, it just takes you to
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: a new level. Like it doesn't matter how hard you're hurting,
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: if you can hear people yelling you're still running.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's wild.
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: There was Its incredible. It's crazy.
• 13:11
  Speaker 3: There was a time that I read during your early
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: career started to lose a bit of love for the game.
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: Is pre becoming a mom? I mean, did you just
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: one day decide that this is not for me? Or
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: was it gradual?
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah? Probably gradual. Like I mean, I'm a massive family
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: person that my family's my life, and just living away
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: like athlete life, it seems so cool, but living away
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: and constantly missing you know, different events that are happening,
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: you know hard times that your family going through and
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: you can't really be there for them. I'm a bit
• 13:46
  Speaker 4: of the glue in the family. And like my brother
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: went through, you know, ten years of drug addiction and
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: I just felt like I couldn't help him and he
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: was going into rehab at the time, I was in Japan,
• 13:59
  Speaker 4: and I just felt so helpless and I kind of
• 14:03
  Speaker 4: just really spiled and it was almost into an eating
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: disorder because that was something that I can control back then.
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: So then had a real issue around food, around body image.
• 14:12
  Speaker 4: And you know, being an athlete, you think you're strong,
• 14:15
  Speaker 4: can get through anything. But you know, it took me
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: four years to get out of that cycle. Like I
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: was still you know, I was still playing in the
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: national team. I was still playing at Brisbane, but most
• 14:24
  Speaker 4: days I couldn't get out of bed and I couldn't see,
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: you know, the light at the end of the tunnel.
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: It just felt so heavy all the time. And it
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: wasn't until like I got pregnant that all changed. Really.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: I guess I'm very fortunate, like most men are, we
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: don't struggle with our body image anywhere near as much
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: as women do. And as a father to two girls,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: and I often wonder what it's going to be like
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: for them when they start growing up. Right now they're
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: five and three, but when they're teenagers, what kind of
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: struggles would they face. When you think back to when
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: you were struggling with your body image, was there anything
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: in particular that contributed to that.
• 15:00
  Speaker 4: I mean, it was probably right the rise in you know,
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: the people that were looking at football. You know, being
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: an athlete, you always need to you know, be strong,
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: be ready to play at any point in time. And
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: I think it was obviously when social media got bigger
• 15:16
  Speaker 4: and bigger that it was kind of like you started
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: comparing yourself to you know, different footballers. You know, if
• 15:23
  Speaker 4: I look like this, maybe I could be a better footballer.
• 15:25
  Speaker 4: So it kind of probably you know, started when football
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: kind of really took off, and also social media as well.
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: And so then who who helped you get through that?
• 15:36
  Speaker 4: I eventually, like I started confiding in some of my
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: you know, family and my close friends and just you know,
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: speaking about it. I started speaking to a psychologist quite often, which, yeah,
• 15:49
  Speaker 4: you know, you'd walk into a less session and you'd think,
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: you know, I'm not going to tell her anything. I'm
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: going to talk to her, and yeah, at the end
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: of it's just like word vomit and you walk out
• 15:57
  Speaker 4: and you're like, I didn't want to tell her.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: All about it all comes out have a way of
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: just you know, sometimes I don't say anything and you're like.
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Okay, this has happened. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, I
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: think I mean everyone could see that I was struggling.
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: But I feel like, you know, people are worried about
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: asking the question because I don't really know how to
• 16:20
  Speaker 4: actually be there for someone. But you know, I just
• 16:23
  Speaker 4: needed people to talk to and to know that I
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: was going through it. And after I started doing that,
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: you know, the weight who lifted and I felt like,
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: you know, I had people to support me. I had
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: people to get me through, and you know, it got
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: easier and easier, and then I got pregnant and found
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: a new you know, gratitude and respect for my body
• 16:40
  Speaker 4: and never looked back.
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: Really, sometimes you just need someone to sit and listen,
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: you know, not to ask too many questions, and it's
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: super super powerful. So I mean saying like I've got
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: I've got a young daughter as well, and you know,
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: you talk about social media and body image, and I
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: mean as professional athletes, you guys are you know, monitored
• 16:58
  Speaker 3: around the clock with your training, your eating. You're constantly
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: going way in all this sort of stuff because they
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: know where the optimal performance is. So you must go
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: home and try and go to bed and consistently think
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: about that like, I know I would, And it's like,
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: there must be so many young women out there that
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: are going through this journey of becoming a professional athlete and.
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: Not having the support.
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: So it's good to know that, you know, there was
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: team psychologists, you could reach out to someone and actually
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: just tell them how you're feeling. So it's super encouraging
• 17:30
  Speaker 3: knowing that the game is getting bigger too, and all
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: the female sports getting bigger, and they're going to have
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: people to be able to talk.
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: To, Yeah, for sure. And I think the more you
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: talk about the more you realize that there's so many
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: other athletes that are going through it. And I think,
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: you know, when I started talking about openly, the amount
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: of people that I heard back from that were going
• 17:48
  Speaker 4: through a similar thing. And then you know, you have
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: a little community that you're kind of helping along because yeah,
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: you get better, but of course there's the days that
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: you like, like, how was I in that space to
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: start off with? And you know, will I ever fall
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: back into that? And you know there's still a little,
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: you know, voice in your head all the time. It's
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: not something that you can just get rid of, especially
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: still living the athlete life. So it's definitely tough. It
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: worries me with arpificial growing up now.
• 18:15
  Speaker 5: Kid.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: You've spoken before about the fact that you always wanted
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: wanted to be a mum by the time you were thirty. Yeah,
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: because your journey to being a mother was a little
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: bit unique in that you went down the root of
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: IVF and you were a single parent. The decision to
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: start IVF. How long had that been marinating for and
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: when did you decide to pull the trigger?
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: Honestly, probably for ten years or more. Like it's hard
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: about I always you know, any of my friends that
• 18:46
  Speaker 4: asked me, which is it sounds so crazy. But when
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: I was like fifteen, my friend would be like, so, like,
• 18:51
  Speaker 4: do you reckon you'd have kids. I'm like, yeah, I'm
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: going to be a single month Like, wow, that's a
• 18:55
  Speaker 4: weird thing to say.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: It's also so confident.
• 18:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I mean I didn't know it, but I
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: just like, I mean, we went through divorce as kids,
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: and like my parents were great and they got along
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: and we were very lucky. But just going through that,
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: I never I thought, you know, I don't want to
• 19:09
  Speaker 4: put my kids through that kind of thing, and so
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: I just always thought, oh, I'll be a single mum.
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: And then when I was, you know, starting to get
• 19:17
  Speaker 4: late twenties, I just thought I was over in Norway
• 19:20
  Speaker 4: at the time I got injured, and I thought, I'm
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: just going to, you know, see if there's a clinic
• 19:24
  Speaker 4: close to me, and you know, three weeks later I
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: walked in and another two weeks later I walked out pregnant.
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: So it was really quite Yeah, it was crazy, like
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: because when I walked in, I wasn't due for my period,
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: but I walked in and I got it as soon
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: as I got in the door, which was wild. Yeah,
• 19:42
  Speaker 4: and like my period is due, like it's usually on
• 19:45
  Speaker 4: the day the same time every nth, so literally, so yeah,
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: it was crazy. And yeah, he said all week can
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: start today, and it was in COVID time, so really
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: difficult to get a flight back home. So then when
• 19:58
  Speaker 4: they did the egg retrieval, it was a day late
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: and I was flying out three days after that, so
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: they actually put the embryo in almost two days earlier
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: than what they usually would. So I sat cross legged
• 20:08
  Speaker 4: on the flight back, touched down into two weeks of quarantine.
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: Wow, I mean you didn't tell anyone, you you just
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: went along and did it on your own.
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I just I was worried that somebody was gonna,
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: you know, talk me out of it, tell me to
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: think about football law.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, did you tell anybody at all?
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: Obviously the guy at the clinic, Yeah, the.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: Guy clinic and the nurse is new. But no, I
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: hit everything. And I was living with four of the
• 20:37
  Speaker 4: players at the time and was hiding like my injections
• 20:41
  Speaker 4: and ice cream containers in the fridge, so it was
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: kind of like exciting. I felt like a little kid
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: again trying to hide things. Wow, yeah, it was crazy.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: Correct me if I'm wrong. But Norway is unique and
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: that you don't get to decide the sperm donor is
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: that right that you get You just get given. Like
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: do you have any type of checklist to say, like
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I want him to be good at sport.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: In finance?
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: No, I mean I probably could have, but I guess
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: because I didn't really have a partner of them to
• 21:17
  Speaker 4: match anyone with. So I kind of just said I
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: wanted him to be Scandinavian, which I don't even like.
• 21:23
  Speaker 4: I love the Scandis. I think they're cool. They're a
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: bit like you know, Australians. I wanted to be quite
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: far away from Australia and other than that, I just
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: I thought it was nice that I didn't get a
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: whole profile in them, because I think then it leaves
• 21:38
  Speaker 4: out the expectation. You know, if he's a great footballer
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: and I'm a great footballer, then half was going to
• 21:43
  Speaker 4: be a great footballer. So you know, I felt like
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: I didn't really pick my partners like that, so I
• 21:47
  Speaker 4: didn't want to pick tiny little details of somebody's profile,
• 21:52
  Speaker 4: and I thought it was kind of a nice way
• 21:53
  Speaker 4: to do it.
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: It can all be a fun surprising journey how they
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: turn out and how they look like. I watched the
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: She's a Strange Story with my wife and she was
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: just like she was a blubbering mess. She was crying
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: because you're so happy for this whole story. But she
• 22:07
  Speaker 3: was like such a cute kid, and I was like, yeah,
• 22:10
  Speaker 3: you know, she didn't get a choice in any of that,
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: and it was just like, so it's just such.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: A unique situation.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: Do they say, what raised do you go into that
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: much detail?
• 22:18
  Speaker 5: No?
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: I mean, I said scared Anavian, so I knew he
• 22:22
  Speaker 4: was somewhere, you know, Danish Swedish in that vicinity, but no,
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: Apart from that, I knew he was healthy. They obviously
• 22:29
  Speaker 4: all have health checks and in Norway they can only
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: have five families, so I thought that was quite good
• 22:35
  Speaker 4: as well, where right in the US they can they
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: can have ninety nine families.
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, is that where all these documentaries are
• 22:42
  Speaker 3: coming out.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: It's like someone's got like kids.
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Literally, I felt like I felt like the Norwegians
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: were quite trustworthy, so I probably hopefully no documentaries come
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: out of a clinic.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: On Netflix.
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: When you got back to Brisbane, you told your mum
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: you're about four weeks pregnant. At the time, What was
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: it like sharing the news with her?
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: Well, at the time, there was quite a few kids
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: coming in the family. To be honest, I think her
• 23:13
  Speaker 4: words were.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: Fuck me dead, that's beautiful.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: Well said.
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: She didn't know what a pregnancy test was, so she
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: didn't really understand, and she thought I was giving it
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: the box of you know, little socks and stuff on
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: my sister's behalf, which I don't know where she got it.
• 23:33
  Speaker 4: I think she just never in her mind thought that
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: I would stop playing football and get pregnant.
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: I suppose it would be a big shock for her.
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: I mean you've come back, You've come out of quarantine.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh, I'm back and I'm pregnant.
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, So obviously first law was always you know, football,
• 23:51
  Speaker 4: but you know, the day later she came to the
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: blood test, and she's been by my side through every
• 23:57
  Speaker 4: national team camp, so she came around pretty quickly. And
• 24:00
  Speaker 4: now halfa is just our favorite human in the world.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: So had you worked out the logistics of it all?
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: Not at all, not at all, Like Mom and I
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: had never spoken about it.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: Forgive us, we're two men, very naive.
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: How long is it pregnancy?
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: We just know, we just know. But like, how long
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: did you play?
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: How many weeks until it was like, okay, we can't
• 24:24
  Speaker 3: play anymore just because it's an impact sport.
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, So I played up until I was about
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: eleven weeks. I probably I probably could have played a
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: few more weeks longer, but I still had So I
• 24:36
  Speaker 4: had os pubis before I got it, which is like
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: almost like fractures in the bone on your pubic bone,
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: and I was trying to rehab that but it didn't
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: go away. So the bigger that she was getting, the
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: more weight that was going through my pelvis, and by
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: like eleven weeks, I could barely get out of bed.
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: I could barely walk in the morning. I just stopped
• 24:55
  Speaker 4: a few weeks earlier than I would have liked to.
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: But yeah, it was definitely a special eleven weeks. You know,
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: I scored a goal and was pregnant, and yeah, definitely
• 25:03
  Speaker 4: a special one to look back on for sure.
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: Again, our naivety here with professional athlete women that are
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: going through a pregnancy.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: What's the support like from there?
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: Essentially your employer, right, so from the team that you're
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: playing for at the time, what's there?
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: I mean, Brisbane were awesome. I was playing for Brisbane
• 25:21
  Speaker 4: right at the time. They were awesome. You know, I
• 25:23
  Speaker 4: still went to training, I still tried to take on
• 25:26
  Speaker 4: more of a leadership role when I wasn't playing, so
• 25:28
  Speaker 4: that was really nice, and could obviously get treatment when
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: I was there. I was trying to do a fair
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: bit of strength work. I couldn't really run after that.
• 25:35
  Speaker 4: And then the national team were awesome as well, you know,
• 25:38
  Speaker 4: helped me with like a women's health hysia. When I
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: was returning. Always were, you know, on the phone to
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: see what else I could do. To be honest, I
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: didn't even know if I wanted to return to football
• 25:47
  Speaker 4: after I had a back. I hadn't really thought about it.
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: I just know I was pretty happy just going to
• 25:52
  Speaker 4: be a mum. And then it kind of all changed
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: when she came earthslid and I thought, you know what,
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: let's try and get to the World Cup together.
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's great.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: Before we go into before that, before we go into that,
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: I do want to ask, childbirth is a pretty crazy experience.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: Was it smooth sailing for you, Katrina?
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: No?
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: And I say that and I kind of know the answer,
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: but obviously people won't know the answer.
• 26:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah. No, My my birth experience was quite crazy. So
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: on the Friday, it was my birthday, thirteenth of August,
• 26:26
  Speaker 4: two days after my water is somewhat broke. So I
• 26:30
  Speaker 4: had a slow leak for three days.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: Oh my goodness.
• 26:32
  Speaker 4: So yeah, didn't sleep. I thought it was happening. Nothing
• 26:36
  Speaker 4: was happening. And then by the Sunday they had to
• 26:39
  Speaker 4: induce me. And then of course when they induced me,
• 26:41
  Speaker 4: she turned spine spine.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: So is that posteria?
• 26:45
  Speaker 4: No op, so her spine so she was still head down,
• 26:49
  Speaker 4: but her spine was on my spine right, So just
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: incredibly painful. Have you ever heard of water shots.
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: Water shots?
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so they sit like six needles in your at
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: the same time. Six yeah. Yeah, because I didn't really
• 27:06
  Speaker 4: want to, like, I didn't want to take any painkillers,
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: so I was on the gas and I was just
• 27:10
  Speaker 4: in excruciating pain. So they're like, we can try the
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: water shots anyway. It's like six beast things at the
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: same time. Oh, and it's meant to, like, I guess,
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: send neural signals to your brain to say that you're
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: not in pain, which it worked, but only for.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: Two hours, so oh my goodness.
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: At the end of that, I thought, just give me
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: the EPI durol.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: Did you get the EPI I.
• 27:30
  Speaker 4: Had the ep droel. Yeah. Then I was just laying
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: there watching a foot a game.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's funny.
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: Probably should have this to start offwards, my.
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: Wife had an EPI durl like our firstborn similar thing
• 27:44
  Speaker 3: turned spine to spine, and she was like.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: Just give me that every gyroal and then after that
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: she was sweet. She was just like, I can't feel
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: any it's wild.
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Well I had mum in the room with me,
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: and she, I mean, she's had five kids and she
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: had no relief. Oh well, if you can do it,
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: then I can do it, like surely so but when
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: they put the ePIE drool in, they missed three times,
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: so I had like blood spurting out of my back
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: and my moment, I can't deal with this, what's happening?
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: Oh my god?
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it just got worse and worse after that, even
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: after the epi drool lost, the leader of blood started
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: vomiting blood. Yeah it was it was pretty wild. But
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: literally a minute later it was like, do that all again.
• 28:28
  Speaker 4: It was cool.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, wow, it's crazy vomiting blood and then cool.
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah when you hold them in your arms, you're like,
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: what a cool thing?
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: Like yeah, yeah, surreal moment changes you instantly. Were you
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: able to then enjoy your time with Harper or because
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: of the loss of blood? Did they have to say?
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: But you know, try and sort you out. Now you're
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: not in a place where you can just relax with baby.
• 28:56
  Speaker 4: I mean when I first told her, I thought I
• 28:58
  Speaker 4: was going to pass out and I was about to
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: give her up. But then I started spewing, and after
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: that I felt Okay. Then they jabbed me with a
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: million needles and anyway, we're fine after that, but she
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: was completely fine, So we got all of our nice
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: skin to skin and she started feeding straight away, and yeah,
• 29:15
  Speaker 4: it was pretty perfect.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: Like this is all worth it?
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, literally, but I'm going to be on your
• 29:21
  Speaker 4: side and in the next couple of weeks, so.
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: I'll let you know, has not as many needles.
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: I might sneak a bit of the gas to be honest,
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: to go for it.
• 29:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it was harper a good sleeper at first,
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: Like we're like, how did this? How did the sleep
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: come about? I always say you get a sleeper or
• 29:41
  Speaker 3: a non sleeper.
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: For me, it was kind of not like I didn't
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: have to share a bed with my partner. There was
• 29:46
  Speaker 4: no one in the room. It was just us. So
• 29:48
  Speaker 4: I think for that it was quite nice. I pretty
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: much had her in my bed. She started in the
• 29:52
  Speaker 4: coat sleeper for a couple of days we had a snoop,
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: but it was just easier because I was feeding to
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: just put her in the bed when she woke, it
• 30:00
  Speaker 4: could change her you know, feeder, and she would sleep
• 30:03
  Speaker 4: and continue to sleep. So I think that's why I
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: made my return affair a bit easier, because I mean
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: I still used to get you know, a decent amount
• 30:12
  Speaker 4: of sleep at night and then after training, I'd come
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: home and probably met with her for three four hours.
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: So that's the dream. Yeah, I don't do that now.
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: I don't want to alarm. You could train her, but
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: it normally happens that you get one good, one and one.
• 30:27
  Speaker 4: We're hoping that we've skipped it because it's technically Clara's curse.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's true.
• 30:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, we hope we skipped it. And it's actually half
• 30:39
  Speaker 4: a twin that we will not twin. But the embryo
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: was taken out at the same time as halfer, so
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: it's been in the freezer for a little bit, so
• 30:47
  Speaker 4: maybe there as well, same age, maybe hopefully the same
• 30:52
  Speaker 4: sort of you know, personalities sleep. Yeah, we're hoping that.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'll.
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: Let you know same yeah. Yeah, so everything insane?
• 31:03
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, definitely a boy? Yeah yeah, what if he
• 31:07
  Speaker 3: looks exactly the same.
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: Well, when we had the three D photos, he almost
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: looked the spitting image of.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm excited to see now.
• 31:15
  Speaker 4: I mean, she's got like really big lips, which I
• 31:17
  Speaker 4: have to thank the donor for. Yeah, he has really
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: big lips too.
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: So after you have Harper, do you remember when you thought, yeah,
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: I could definitely make a return here to professional sport.
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: To be honest, when I felt like I wanted to
• 31:42
  Speaker 4: run again, so I started running I think about nine
• 31:45
  Speaker 4: weeks after I had her, and I felt amazing, like
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: it just it felt like I was a little kid again.
• 31:52
  Speaker 4: I hadn't even kicked the ball, but just moving and
• 31:55
  Speaker 4: then you know, slowly introducing football stuff. Honestly felt like
• 32:00
  Speaker 4: I was ten years old again. And yeah, from them,
• 32:02
  Speaker 4: I just you know, every time I played, I just
• 32:05
  Speaker 4: enjoyed it more. But I think, you know, when I
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: didn't have Harper, I would go back and I'd think about,
• 32:11
  Speaker 4: you know, all the bad things I did in training,
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: what I did badly in the game, and I would
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: just be so stuck in just a football spiral almost,
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: And now I'm just I get off the field and
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: you know, I'm a mum and we move on and
• 32:24
  Speaker 4: she laughs at me. She doesn't care what I did
• 32:26
  Speaker 4: on the field, you know, if we won last if
• 32:28
  Speaker 4: I scored no goal, or what happened. And I think
• 32:31
  Speaker 4: that's why it's changed football for me. It's you know,
• 32:34
  Speaker 4: I do it because I love it, and then I
• 32:36
  Speaker 4: get off the field and you know, it's the best
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: thing in the world.
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: And how is it I'm trying to like, I think
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: having a kid can be such a handicap.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: You know, don't tell them that.
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: No, I love my kids to death, but you know,
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: we know ash that we do. There's many times where
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: we try and catch up for work and what of
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: our kids is are well, and it's it's really bloody hard.
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: I'm just trying to imagine for yourself as a single
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: parent trying to play professional sport, Like, how much harder
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: is it compared to when you didn't have a kid.
• 33:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it definitely is hard, especially I mean I was
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: feeding until she was one, so like even preparing that
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: before a game was really difficult. Obviously pregame routine would
• 33:22
  Speaker 4: consist of changing nappies and you know, making sure she's
• 33:25
  Speaker 4: happy instead of instead of you know, doing all the
• 33:28
  Speaker 4: normal things. But yeah, it's definitely got its challenges for sure.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: But you move back to.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: Swedish sign with the Sweden Club.
• 33:35
  Speaker 3: Can you pronounce that Swedish club for us?
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Please?
• 33:38
  Speaker 4: I'm probably gonna butcher it, but I say viswa.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah see that's that's bang on. I reckon, Yeah you were.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: I approve.
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: I'm going to put it into Google and I'll figure
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: it out.
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: You're you're in Sweden, away from your family, where even
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: speaking English, I guess Swedes are pretty good normally. Yeah,
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: but like you know, you can't just go down the
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: chemist and like pick out things yourself because everything's in Swedish.
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Look, you know, when I got over there, I
• 34:12
  Speaker 4: actually thought like what am I doing? How am I
• 34:14
  Speaker 4: even going to do this? But the club were incredible.
• 34:17
  Speaker 4: They found nannies for us, so I'd bring out a
• 34:21
  Speaker 4: training should get looked after there. She'd come on all
• 34:24
  Speaker 4: the bus trips or new way trips. She came everywhere
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: with me, so it was actually really nice. But just
• 34:29
  Speaker 4: you know, the simple things. Most of their apartments don't
• 34:33
  Speaker 4: have lifts, so I had to cut her pram groceries,
• 34:37
  Speaker 4: washing up three flights of stairs every day. Like, yeah,
• 34:40
  Speaker 4: I got pretty big arm muscles out of it.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: It's like a separate fitness.
• 34:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah literally, but yeah, just those small things that you
• 34:49
  Speaker 4: you know, you kind of take for granted when you've
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: got support around in Australia. But obviously Clara was quite helpful. Yeah,
• 34:56
  Speaker 4: the club work were awesome. They helped us wherever they
• 34:59
  Speaker 4: could a few of the girls around me that would help.
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: But yeah, we slowly figured it out.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: Let's talk about Clara a little bit.
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: Were you were you looking for love at all?
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: Was this absolutely not? To be honest? No, I was
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: so done with relationships. I just wanted to focus on
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: me and Harper and getting back and enjoying football.
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: But this is one of those cliche scenarios where it's like,
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: as soon as you stop looking, it'll find you exactly right.
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, because I was a relationship person. I loved them.
• 35:33
  Speaker 4: I was yeah, you know, I had quite some quite
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: long relationships before that, and yeah, I was known to
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: be in relationships. But then it was like this is no,
• 35:41
  Speaker 4: this is my time. It's just showing me and Harper
• 35:43
  Speaker 4: we're going to enjoy our time over here. But that
• 35:45
  Speaker 4: changed pretty quickly.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Did you so you played with Clara? Is that is
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: that where where you met?
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: Yeah? And she she kind of likes to help the
• 35:55
  Speaker 4: internationals when they go over I guess she knows how
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: hard is to, you know, do things. She was quite
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: helpful before we got there, found us an apartment and
• 36:03
  Speaker 4: things like that. Maybe she had a crush on me
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: before I even't gone out.
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: Did she just say that as like.
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, several times literally, but no. Even our coach said
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: to I think she's He said to her, you know,
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: I think you and Gorri would be a good match
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: or something like that. Oh wow, So he called it
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: before it all happened. My mum called it before it happened.
• 36:29
  Speaker 4: So yeah, I guess. I mean, she's just such a like, kind,
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: loving and helpful person. And like my mum's hated all
• 36:39
  Speaker 4: my partners, so she really loved Clara. So that was
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: kind of just a tick of approval that I needed.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: And yeah, do you remember when the feeling became mutual
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: where you went, hang on a minute, I think I
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: love this person. Do you remember that?
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: I mean, to be fair, it probably happened pretty quickly.
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: I guess. You know, i'd seen her with Harp before.
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: You know, I knew who she was around the team.
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: I knew that she just wasn't putting on a show
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: for me. Yeah, she was just Yeah, I pretty much
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: knew straight away that, Wow, she was my person. So yeah,
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: everything happened pretty quickly.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: It's pretty awesome.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: How are you feeling now you're on the brink of
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: becoming a parent for the second time. Are you feeling
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: a lot more prepared coming into it the second time round.
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, probably obviously know what happens. So I think that's
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: definitely helpful. I think I'll be a good birth partner,
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: and I'm like, I'm kind of excited for the challenge
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: on the other side, like how good of a birth
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: partner can I be? How long can I keep her
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: at home when she wants to go to the hospital.
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: Actually, for any dads who are listening, as someone who
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: has given birth, what's your advice? What can the other
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: partner do in the room the person who's not giving birth.
• 37:49
  Speaker 3: Question, Ah, don't faint one of them.
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: Probably don't faint. I don't know. I had my mom
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: and my sister, so it's really hard and they both
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: obviously give the bath.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: So do you have a plan going in? What's your
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: plan going in?
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: I'm just gonna like lead her into the hospital. She's
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: gonna have a blindfold on, so she doesn't really know
• 38:11
  Speaker 4: what's going on around her.
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: I can't tell if it's like a Swedish thing.
• 38:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. You know you need all the oxytocin. No,
• 38:27
  Speaker 4: but just like keep her in her zone as much
• 38:29
  Speaker 4: as I can. For some reason, she wants to meet
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: a mention that it's like doing the Yoyo test, which
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: I don't know if she You know, when you like
• 38:39
  Speaker 4: run and then it gets you get to another level
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: and it gets faster. Yeah, similar to the Big Test.
• 38:45
  Speaker 4: Is a little bit different, but yeah, similar. So she
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: kind of has referred to labor as like the Yoyo test, like,
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: you know, the contractions get stronger, but then they let
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: level out a little bit. So I don't know, I
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: don't think most people would want to be remind a
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: yoo test, But.
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: Anyway, that's good, Katrina.
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: Both Matt and I have kids that are currently in daycare,
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: Kindy preschool. However, youone say you are currently living in
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: the UK and now Harper is attending Kindy over there?
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: How does she? How did you fit in? How is
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: she fitting in?
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: We were lucky she she loves Kindy in the UK,
• 39:23
  Speaker 4: but when we were in Sweden we got her in.
• 39:25
  Speaker 4: They call it first School Sweden. To be fair, you
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: don't pay much. I think we're paying one hundred dollars
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: and she could go one day five days.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: Wow, it's flexible.
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, so it's it's based on your income, and
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: so we paid one hundred bucks a month. And she
• 39:40
  Speaker 4: could go however much she wanted.
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 39:46
  Speaker 4: I mean, the UK is crazy. But yeah, we were
• 39:49
  Speaker 4: really excited for her, just because obviously she had so
• 39:52
  Speaker 4: much adult interaction that we wanted her to interact with kids.
• 39:55
  Speaker 4: We wanted her to keep on learning Swedish. But she
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: just I'd never seen her, you know, she goes to
• 40:02
  Speaker 4: so many different people, but she never wanted. She would
• 40:05
  Speaker 4: see the top of the building out of her car
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: seat and start screaming in the car like wow. But
• 40:11
  Speaker 4: you know, she loves being outdoors. And they would send
• 40:14
  Speaker 4: us pictures of her laying in the prem just lifeless,
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: like there was nothing in her face like that, and
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: I would just I would go home, and because our
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: training was at you know, night, so she didn't really
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: need to be there. I was at home. I would
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: sit there and just like pretty much cry and be like,
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: what am I doing? Why am I putting her through this?
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: I'd make any excuse, you know, if she has a
• 40:38
  Speaker 4: bit of a running nose, you know, she's staying home
• 40:41
  Speaker 4: with me. So it was really really difficult, probably one
• 40:44
  Speaker 4: of the most difficult times I've had trying to figure
• 40:46
  Speaker 4: out what's actually right and what's not and eventually we
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: took her out and moved to the UK and the
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: place she loves it. Now, I can't you know, we
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: go to pick her up. It started at two o'clock
• 40:58
  Speaker 4: now it's been pushed to five o'clock and we walk
• 41:00
  Speaker 4: in and she doesn't want a bar of us.
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm still of going through that too. Like I've
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: had a few moments. It does break your heart when
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: you see them. Like for us, I walk up, walk out,
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: up against the fence, and some days are good, some
• 41:13
  Speaker 3: days are bad, but it does break your heart.
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: And you're like, am I doing the right thing here?
• 41:18
  Speaker 3: We've talked about it. I've turned back and gone in
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: and grabbed the kid and left because I just felt like, yeah,
• 41:23
  Speaker 3: it was just too heartbreaking.
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean they can't. How can they learn stuff
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: when they're that distressed? You know. I just yeah, you know,
• 41:31
  Speaker 4: when Harp was crying and cleaning onto them, no Mama,
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: don't go, no Mama please, I'm like, then I start
• 41:36
  Speaker 4: crying and I'm like, no, you don't go, come on,
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: let's go together. Yeah.
• 41:41
  Speaker 6: I mean, maybe she was just a bit older when
• 41:43
  Speaker 6: she got to the UK KINDI but I mean they're
• 41:46
  Speaker 6: they're incredible for with her, Like some days she doesn't
• 41:49
  Speaker 6: really want to go in with the kids, and so
• 41:50
  Speaker 6: she gets to work in the office with the girls.
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: So yeah, they're pretty chill there, which has been really nice,
• 41:56
  Speaker 4: and she loves it. So it just costs me my
• 41:59
  Speaker 4: arm and my leg. So yeah, right, Yeah.
• 42:05
  Speaker 3: I'm glad she's found somewhere where she's a bit more comfortable,
• 42:08
  Speaker 3: because there's nothing worse than that drop off is there.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: She's got expensive taste, yeah, literally got budget place before.
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't want to be there.
• 42:20
  Speaker 3: How old was Harper when the World Cup started? She
• 42:23
  Speaker 3: obviously became a cult figure on socials. I mean I
• 42:28
  Speaker 3: followed it. My wife thought we all followed along with sorry,
• 42:31
  Speaker 3: with Harper and yourself and the team and everything that
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: was happening.
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: So how old was she when that kicked off?
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: She turned to during the World Cup?
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I saw there's a lot of footage with
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: her and your mom and all the support that you
• 42:46
  Speaker 3: had around. What was it like going into a World
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: Cup and having essentially your number one support to get
• 42:51
  Speaker 3: to follow you around the whole time and follow the
• 42:54
  Speaker 3: team around, And what was the vibe like having a
• 42:56
  Speaker 3: kid there the whole time.
• 42:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean it was incredible. I think you know,
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: when a tournament is so tense, you know, she just
• 43:04
  Speaker 4: made it flung. She always brought light to the room.
• 43:07
  Speaker 4: You know, when Milana got Concuston wasn't able to play,
• 43:10
  Speaker 4: like half could see that she was you know, the kids,
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: they just know and she just went up to her, yeah,
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: and just cuddled her and like just wouldn't leave her
• 43:18
  Speaker 4: side because she just felt like she needed that. So
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: there was definitely really like really nice moments in the
• 43:26
  Speaker 4: World Cup that you know, she just brought light to
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: it or just made us focus on something else for
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: a little bit. So it was so nice having her there.
• 43:33
  Speaker 4: Obviously having Mum there was pretty special too, and all
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: my family. But yeah, I just I could never have
• 43:40
  Speaker 4: dreamt that the World Cup would have been like that that.
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: You know, Australia was so behind us, and that's you
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: know football and you know women's sport has changed forever
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: in Australia. It's just it. Yeah, it's honestly crazy.
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: You know what's going to happen, Katrina when the time
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: comes when you do retire, they'll still have her on
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: a contract.
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: And the mask and you'll get dragged into camp as well.
• 44:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I'm all fine for that.
• 44:06
  Speaker 3: It was such a pivotal moment in Australian sport. I mean,
• 44:10
  Speaker 3: I remember I got to go to one game, which
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: I've been to a lot of sporting events, and the
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: atmosphere against It was against Denmark and I was quite
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: close to the field, which was amazing, but the atmosphere
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: was like something I'd never I'd never been a part of.
• 44:24
  Speaker 3: It was unbelievable the amount of people riding that wave.
• 44:29
  Speaker 3: Do you feel incredibly proud for everything that you and
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: the Matilda's achieved over that time, Yeah.
• 44:36
  Speaker 4: For sure. I think you know, from where it's come
• 44:39
  Speaker 4: from to where it is now, it's just Yeah, like
• 44:42
  Speaker 4: I said, it's an absolute dream and for now the
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: next generation to kind of live through that and get to,
• 44:49
  Speaker 4: you know, pave the way for them. I think it's
• 44:52
  Speaker 4: so special for us to leave the game in a
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: better place. And there's actually a Trailblazer film that's coming out,
• 44:58
  Speaker 4: a documentary that's coming out. Stand. I think that really
• 45:01
  Speaker 4: goes through you know, where the Matildas were and where
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: they are now. And I think to look back on
• 45:07
  Speaker 4: the World Cup like that is Yeah, it will be
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: something that we hold closer our hearts forever.
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: I do want to ask, as a father to two
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: girls when they do turn into teenagers, as someone who
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: was a little bit tricky as a thirteen year old,
• 45:22
  Speaker 2: what advice would you give?
• 45:24
  Speaker 4: Gosh, maybe you can give me an advice when they
• 45:27
  Speaker 4: turned thirteen.
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: Help, we'll just go down the line.
• 45:32
  Speaker 4: I don't know, honestly, I'd probably have to ask my mum.
• 45:35
  Speaker 4: I was just such a menace. I don't think anyone
• 45:37
  Speaker 4: could help me or give me advice. I don't know.
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: Let me put it, let me put it slightly.
• 45:42
  Speaker 4: Differently, give them whatever they want. Yeah.
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, if you were going to give Harper some advice
• 45:48
  Speaker 3: about her future, what.
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: Would it be?
• 45:50
  Speaker 4: I mean, probably play any sport that you can take,
• 45:53
  Speaker 4: any opportunity that you possibly can, have good friends around you,
• 45:58
  Speaker 4: and make sure you continue to make your mum your
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: best friend.
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: That's good. That is good.
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: Katrina. You are an incredible athlete, an incredible mum who's
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: got such an awesome stories. Thank you so much for
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: sharing that with us today.
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Katrina.
• 46:14
  Speaker 4: I appreciate it, no worries. Loved being here, Matt.
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: What an amazing chat.
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: We got to talk about all sorts of things. We're
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: to talk mainly about what I love most, which is
• 46:25
  Speaker 3: sport and parenting.
• 46:27
  Speaker 2: Thanks so much to Katrina for giving us her time.
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: If you enjoyed this episode, Ash and I and Katrina
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: would also love it.
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: If you left a five star review, also suggest any
• 46:38
  Speaker 3: other Doting parents.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: You would love to have on the podcast. Until next time.
• 46:44
  Speaker 5: Goodbye bye two.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
• 47:02
  Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 47:05
  Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander
• 47:08
  Speaker 3: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land