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What It Really Takes to Reinvent Yourself: Brande Roderick Tells All · Harder Than Life

• 0:00
  My fourth grade teacher at one point called me a slut because she had heard about my dream of being a playmate. From Baywatch to boardrooms, this woman has done it all. Straight up badass. You can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. Best part. You made it to the end of Celebrity Apprentice. Pretty good. How real was the boardroom drama that was going on in there? I'll tell ya.
• 0:27
  I learned a lot from that show. One of the favorite things that he ever said, no one deserves anything. He said, you earn it. Anything and everything online is fake. Pam Anderson decided to no makeup and look what people did to her. They tore her apart.
• 0:46
  Being mean and tough and rude is just a mask for a wound. We have to keep up with the Joneses and do what everybody's doing, because if you're the one that doesn't, you'll look like shit. Kindness is underrated, I think, that. We need to bring it back, Kelly. Yes, let's bring it back. Let's do it. Let's talk about resilience with Brandi Roderick.
• 1:09
  All right, 100 Life Nation, buckle up, because today I'm joined by the one and only Brandi Roderick. From Baywatch to boardrooms, this woman has done it all. Model, actress, author, entrepreneur, and straight up badass. She's proved that you can evolve, adapt, and dominate every chapter of your life. Let's talk about resilience, reinvention, and how to bounce, not break, with Brandi Roderick.
• 1:35
  Hello, Kelly. Thank you so much for having me. So awesome. What was the moment where you knew you were more than just a model? Oh, gosh. I've never seen myself as a model, ever. So when people say, oh, you're a model, no, I'm an actress. And then I posed in Playboy. And then when I do model, I feel like it's to
• 2:01
  I don't know. I've just never considered myself a model. To me, models are, you know, on the runway and they're five feet nine and, you know, these long, gorgeous legs. But for my whole life, I've always, you know, had big dreams. I mean, I graduated from high school a year early so that I could go and get my real estate license and start selling houses so I could eventually buy my own house. So I've always had, you know, big dreams for myself and always, you know, new,
• 2:31
  How did you end up in Playboy then? How does a girl who's in real estate end up at the Playboy Mansion? Well, that has been a dream of mine since as far back as I can remember. I even told my fifth grade teacher when they asked, what do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be in Playboy. I want to be a playmate. Reason being is ever since I could remember, my mom always told me the story of how I was named. And she was...
• 2:56
  you know, overdue by two weeks. So she started walking. She decided to walk to her uncle's house, miles to his house, goes and grabs some water, plops down on the couch. And lo and behold, on the table, there are some Playboys. So she picked up the magazine, flipping through. She sees this beautiful, gorgeous blonde girl. Her name is Brandy, spelled with an E, just like mine. And she said, how about my daughter to look like that? And she named me Brandy. Her entire pregnancy, my name was going to be Tony.
• 3:23
  And then this magazine of this beautiful woman changed her mind. And then my grandfather in his bathroom had a centerfold made on this piece of wood in his bathroom. So it was kind of like always like, oh, wow, you think these women are beautiful? Like this is something I need to strive to be. So it's something I'd always wanted to do since a very, very young age.
• 3:46
  How did that conversation in fifth grade, did you get in trouble or how did that go? Like, what did they say? I didn't get in trouble, but my teacher, Miss Briney, she was dating John Denver. So she was just like in her own little world herself in this like Hollywood world. And so I don't know that she thought much of it. But my fourth grade teacher at one point, when I was on the playground, actually called me a slut.
• 4:14
  to one of the other teachers because she had heard about my dream of being a playmate yeah it's pretty crazy young girl would say that brandy was the dream to be in in playboy or be a playmate oh to be a playmate yes when you reach that dream how did it really change your life
• 4:33
  Well, it changed everything. Went over to shoot Baywatch. And then while I was shooting Baywatch, got the call, do you want to be Playmate of the Year? Yes, I want to be the Playmate of the Year. So everything just started rolling, but it all started with that door opening. Prior to that, I did, you know,
• 4:51
  TV shows like 90210. I did a couple episodes of Love Boat, you know, did stuff like that. But Baywatch and Playboy were the big push. Yeah, you really are an actress. I should ask you about David Hasselhoff, but I got to ask about Jason Momoa. What was it like stepping on with him? Because I just I think he's one of the coolest dudes on the planet. How was it like stepping on a set of Baywatch with him?
• 5:13
  As soon as I arrived in Hawaii, he and Stacey Kamano, who played Kakoa on the show, they show up in Jason's convertible Jeep, show up to pick me up from the airport. As soon as I get in, we just drive along the beach. We pull off and we just go right to the sand and the sun is setting and he's over there on these huge rocks, just crawling up, you know, on these rocks.
• 5:37
  But he just had that just down to earth welcoming. He's like a little brother to me. He just was such a joy to be around. Just a really sweet, sweet kid. There's tremendous depth to you. You made it to the end of Celebrity Apprentice. How real was the boardroom drama that was going on in there?
• 5:58
  The boardroom drama was real. I'll tell you. It was intimidating to go in and have to not know if you're going to get fired and have to plead your case, you know, in front of the judges. But I'll tell you, I learned a lot from that show. I learned even from him. One of the favorite things that he ever said that I got from someone said, you know, I deserve to be here. And he said, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute.
• 6:21
  No one deserves anything. He said, you earn it. And I love that. And I say that to my kids all the time. You know, it's just a saying that I love. You never deserve anything. You earn it. But I learned a lot from that show. I had a fantastic time and then went back to do the All-Stars, of course. And that was even crazier. But all good, good things. You're like a sponge. You just keep...
• 6:45
  taking in information. I call myself a learn-it-all. You sound like it too. I say that all the time to my daughter. There is no deserves. It is all earned. And you say sponge, and it's funny because you're a learn-it-all. I love that. I'm going to use that if I can. All yours. Because I'm constantly...
• 7:03
  I am just, oh, I fiend for it. I am a sponge. Like I'm currently taking AI courses because I don't want to fall behind. I read four books a month. I, you know, I do everything that I can to learn. And when I ask questions, if anyone's talking about their field of anything, whether it's my friend who just bought a forestry company and land, I went out there and learned everything about his, you know, about all the mulch and the wood stuff.
• 7:29
  About the wine business, I now have a vineyard, so I learn everything about winemaking. And for me, it's fun. I just, I want to learn everything and life is so short, but I definitely am a sponge.
• 7:40
  Brains and Beauty. I love it. What's the last book you read and what are you reading now? I'm a huge reader. I'm reading right now and I'm almost done, thank goodness, because it's been it's so crazy because everybody loves this book. And but the four hour work week is what, you know, Tim Ferriss. I'm reading that now. A lot of people have read it. So I said, I'll read it. But it's so outdated. I found it hard to enjoy it as much. I mean, I took some tidbits from it, but that is the latest one. And it's it's almost finished. So you read nonfiction?
• 8:10
  Only nonfiction. Only nonfiction. Yeah, I don't read fiction. You're like my sister from another mister. I love that. I just gave a speech to my AI cybersecurity company that, guys, what you do and what you take in is everything. So the audience here, they're big winners and they want to be successful and significant. And that's why I'm asking you, what do you do behind these? Because it's not just brains and beauty. It is actually action. I say this all the time. Action builds confidence.
• 8:38
  How would you define confidence today compared to back in your 20s?
• 8:42
  I don't know that it's changed. For me, I learned this from a realtor actually, is knowledge is everything. So like with real estate, knowledge will give you confidence and help you to build your business. Knowledge, knowledge, knowledge. Learn everything and anything you can about your field and everything around your field, not just your field specifically, but everything around it. Knowledge is key. And, you know, if you're driving the car, don't. I'm sorry.
• 9:11
  I'm such a fuddy-duddy. I'm like, don't listen to music. Listen to a book. There's so many times when we're driving in our car, right? You could be listening to a book when you're on the treadmill, when you're in your walk. Learn. Learn everything about your field. Become the expert in your field. You need to do all the things that other people are not doing. And I guarantee you other people are not reading four books a month. You know, read, read, read, learn, learn, learn, and become the expert in your field.
• 9:38
  Only thing I would add to that, you really are my twin. Very rarely do I turn on a TV and very rarely am I listening to music. I have a podcast, an audio book, but I still like to read physical books. I'm reading The Art of Significance right now. Very good book. I try to get one a week done, but sometimes they're a little bit harder. My favorite book in the world is The Four Agreements.
• 10:06
  Oh, yes. I have a right here on my bookshelf. I read it once a year. I love it. Yeah, it's a great one. I believe that confidence, as I'm approaching 50, is calm and peace where nothing rattles you. And I can just feel it in my heart that I'm...
• 10:25
  in equanimity and I'm everything is just going to be okay. I just trust myself a lot more than I did when I was younger. Absolutely. And one thing to help people to get there, like what helped me to get there. I don't know if anybody's read or seen the documentary, A Miracle Morning.
• 10:44
  Um, but that changed everything for me. So every morning, you know, I wake up, I meditate. I'm only meditating 10 minutes. It's not, you know, like it's a ton of, ton of times. Right. But meditate, I visualize, I do my affirmations. Gratitude is everything. If you even just do one thing, put together your gratitude list of all the things you're grateful for, it will change everything. Okay.
• 11:10
  It's impossible to be grateful and stressed at the same time. It's really impossible to have two emotions at the same time. So if you're going to do anything, just be grateful. 100%. Three things I'm grateful for every day and I rotate them. It's so easy. I'm grateful for my kids. I'm grateful for my bed. I'm grateful for being alive. I rotate them to keep it fresh. Well, can I challenge you? Yes, go ahead.
• 11:32
  Say 10 things you're grateful for every day. And it could be anything from the, I think, so thankful I have a car to drive. So many people out there don't have a car to drive. And then just say, and say why I'm thankful for this pen. Because if I didn't have this pen, I couldn't be writing my notes right now. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You say something you're grateful for and you say why you're grateful for it. And then you say thank you three times. And if you do that, you're,
• 11:58
  10 times in the morning every day, you are going to notice a shift and a difference in your life and do it for at least a week and see how you feel after that week. You guys heard it first from Brandy. Brandy.
• 12:08
  I'm going to ask you a question. I know the answer. I can already tell. What's your relationship with spirituality and faith? It's very complex. It's very complex. It's very confusing. I believe in God. I believe there's a higher power. I believe in the universe. I believe in even the spirituality of
• 12:31
  of what you can create yourself and put out there in the universe and what you put out there, you get back. So it's, um, it's very complex as I, I believe in a lot of things.
• 12:43
  I can't wait to meet you in person because we're very, very similar people. So one of the things that you did is you started a production company way back in 2000. What drove you to start that? And then I want to go in and talk about this new movie that you're producing and directing, I believe is what you said. So what started it? Because that's 20, geez, Brandy, 25 years ago. Wow. Yeah. And you were just a young little lady. What drove you to start that?
• 13:11
  Shortly after Baywatch, I really, you know, I, again, like just so motivated to do things. I wanted to create my own movie. I wanted to produce. And I really, I wanted to make, I wanted to bring back She-Ra, you know, He-Man's twin sister and make the movie She-Ra.
• 13:27
  However, you know, not realizing at the time, because I was so young, you know, that there are rights and people own things. And, you know, so it made it very difficult. But, hey, I own She-Ra Productions. So if they ever want to make that movie, they have to come talk to me. So that was the goal. It was started with a dream of wanting to bring back She-Ra in a film role. And then from that point, just started, you know, producing a lot of just reality television because that came into play, different films.
• 13:57
  But the movie, the new movie Wineville, which is under She-Ra Productions, that one is my baby. Started in that, produced it, directed it with my wonderful mentor director, Richard Shankman.
• 14:13
  And that's out now, ready for horror season. And it's a really spooky horror film about a serial killer family. My character ran away when she was 15 from this crazy family. But when she returns after her father dies, she finds that everything has darkened and invested since she's been gone. So now not only does she have to escape herself, she has to try and save her 11-year-old son, which is my real son in real life.
• 14:41
  What is this? Is this out in the movies? Where is it? Where can we? You could, it's streaming now, so you can watch it anywhere. Amazon, Apple, 2B, Plexi, DirecTV, wherever you normally stream things. I just want to make sure I have this right. Yeah. You said serial killer family.
• 14:58
  I'm obsessed with serial killers, like so much so that when I was in college, I took a serial killer course and learned like why they do what they do, how it starts. And it's just I know I'm sick. I come from a sick family. We're really into horror and all things horror. I love it. I love it. What role did being a mom play in shaping your drive and your perspective?
• 15:23
  Well, for me, I've always wanted to be a mom and a mom is number one and it's having children's everything. I mean, my goal now in life, you know, in the beginning of life, you know, his goal was I have to make a movie. I have to be in a movie. I have to. But now that I'm a mom, my goal is to.
• 15:43
  Teach these two young men to grow up, to be kind, gentlemen, hardworking, and to follow their dreams. I am here to help shape them and give them the tools that they need to be the best that they can be. Let me tell you from my perspective, my mother, terrible childhood. Just love them. Just love them. Teach them what it means to love themselves.
• 16:14
  And so they don't need to go seek it anywhere else. I tell everybody is, here's one is your, your, your best device, the best way to just get a mirror, look in the mirror and that'll, you'll lead to success every time. Just there's one finger pointing away. There's three pointing right back at you. All I've ever wanted in life is my mom to love me. Hmm. Hmm.
• 16:38
  Yeah, that's that's that's tough. Yeah. And that you didn't get that from her. That's for me is is the easiest thing. I mean, that's that's they they are all that I've ever wanted. You know, that's my my goal in life is is to do everything for them. And, you know, having them actually made me a better person.
• 16:57
  Because I am teaching them to be a certain way. So I have to act that certain way. Yes, you do. You know, whatever it might be. Even something as simple as my son the other day kept, you know, he's getting up and not pushing in his chair. And I'm like, you need to start pushing in your chair, you know, pushing your chair. And I'm getting on him. And then I got up and I noticed I didn't push in my chair. I'm like, oh, shit. Yeah.
• 17:19
  And I hurried up and I pushed the chair in, you know, so it makes you be a better person doing things because kids lead by example. You know, they're watching. Even if you don't know they're watching, they're watching and they're leading by your example. So it definitely makes me be a better person.
• 17:37
  How old are they? They're 14 and 15. Oh, I have a 16-year-old daughter. So they're going to model who they date after you. So set a high bar. And how you do anything is how you do everything. So if they can't push in their chair or clean their plates, what is that going to say about the rest of their life? Make sure, and I know that you do this, I guarantee it, that you make them make their bed every day?
• 18:02
  Oh, yeah, they make their. Well, actually, my younger one does because I made him read the book Make Your Bed. I don't know if you've read that, but it's like an oldie but goodie. But one thing I do want to say, it's so crazy because nowadays, I don't know if you find, but I'm sure you do. Kids are there's a lot of kids. They're very entitled. They.
• 18:22
  No, they're messy with everything. And they're they're they're lazy. Right. And so when they were on that, they both played football. And my youngest was playing football. And after the game, they lost and they were going across the field. And some of them.
• 18:38
  wouldn't shake the hands of the other players. You know how you go across and you slap the hands. They weren't slapping the hands. They were talking smack. So when they came back, their coach told right in front of that other team said, go and run four laps right now around the track. Good for it. They had to run four laps. When they got back, they said, now drop and give me 20.
• 18:57
  Some of the other parents sent all these nasty emails. How dare you do that in front of the other team and got mad at the coach and said something to the coach. And I'm like, are you freaking kidding me? If you want to teach my kid how to have respect for other people and, you know, do what you're supposed to do, go right ahead. Like, yes, he should do four freaking laps. I could not believe these other parents were mad.
• 19:24
  that he embarrassed these kids in front of the other kids. I mean, it's just a crock of shit. I just can't believe it. We need to grow...
• 19:34
  men, people that are going to respect other people and not be sore losers. I was just really amazed by that. But it's good to have men that are teaching men. People are people, man. You have to learn how to lose before you can win. And you also are gonna be humiliated and you're gonna be made look like a fool and you gotta freaking keep your head up and accept it because the tide turns.
• 20:01
  It's life. It's freaking life. These parents that are coddling their kids and keeping them away from feeling that humility are going to unleash them into the world. And they're not going to know what freaking hit them. And they're going to be so insecure. And they're going to be in this crazy bubble. It's like, I don't know what they think they're doing for their kids, but it ain't going to work for their kid. They're doing their kids a disservice. Yeah, I overcorrected. I had no love, no safety.
• 20:29
  And it was just a war zone growing up. And I, you know, made something of myself and provide for my daughter like there's no tomorrow. And she knows she's my why. It's everything. I am the one that broke the chains and it stops. And I find myself spoiling her every once in a while. I'm like, oh.
• 20:49
  I got to stop this. But she's so cute. Right. And, you know, well, hey, you know what? If they're good kids, then guess what? There's nothing wrong with spoiling someone and giving them something when, you know, rewarding them if they're a good kid. I don't see anything wrong with that. So keep gushing and say, what's your proudest moment off camera? Is it your children or is there something else?
• 21:13
  Oh, well, yeah, we're talking about kids. The thing that makes me very proud is when people say how kind and generous and helpful and sweet my kids are. For me, you know, the teachers can say, oh, you know, they got an A, but they're so kind and helpful. And that means more to me than the grade. Yeah. Is that being a good person. So hearing that makes me the most proud.
• 21:37
  I wake my daughter up every morning because she tends to hit snooze. And I tell her about that's a whole nother story. And I just say it's time to be awesome and kind every day. Oh, I like time to be awesome and kind. I'm stealing that one from you, too. You could have it. I just I mean, I knew that if Val connected us that this was going to be a deep conversation. Let's muck it up a little bit. Let's talk about how do you balance glam and grit?
• 22:01
  I mean, I am a tomboy at heart, so I definitely am gritty. I always say, you know, because I love camping, right? I can go camping and be dirty and gritty, but then I can also be drinking Cristal on a yacht. I'm a chameleon. I'm a Gemini. Is it camping or glamping? Come on.
• 22:20
  Um, I don't know. I grew up camping. If, if, if camping is putting a tent in a dirt, then it's camping. Um, I grew up in Northern California. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And I still camp, but now if I camp now I'll camp in a cabin or an RV, but growing up my whole life, you know, it was camping was in a tent, but now I don't have to camp in a tent if I don't need to.
• 22:43
  Do you see the funny humor that God has with giving you two boys and me a little girl? It's almost like they give you what you need to make you who you're supposed to be in this world. Yes, because you're raising a little girl to be a really good mom that you didn't have. Oh, wow.
• 23:07
  You just hit me. You're right. I never even thought of that. So remember that when you're teaching her, you're raising her and teaching her to be that mom to her children. We just had a conversation this week about how I make sure she's my priority. And because I'm flying back to Florida and then I'm coming right back for my parenting time. I never miss parenting time with her. And I said, you know, it'd be so much easier if I just bought you a car, but you didn't earn it.
• 23:34
  So I said, I understand that the lesson is way more important to me than how hard it is. And that's why it's called Harder Than Life because I lean into the hard things. Because if you live life hard way, it'll actually be easy. And if you try to live life an easy way, it'll be hard.
• 23:52
  And she just looks at me like, I wouldn't want to be my daughter, but she's just... I won't back down. I won't. I'll just tell you what I'm doing with the boys. They've been saving up. I've told them since they were young, which might be a little too late unless she already has money saved up, that I will...
• 24:09
  match whatever you raise for your car, I will match it. That way they are earning and they are trying to get that money. So if they end up from, you know, having five, $10,000, I match it and we go get a car. That's my thing with them for the car. So that way you're still helping, you know, cause you say you're spoiling, but they're also learning how to earn that.
• 24:30
  My carrot was very similar, as I've said. She has to get a certain grade point average. And she didn't do it, so she didn't get it. And boy, was it hard. It was hard for me to look at her and say that. And now she's working really hard and getting great grades. And I gave her accelerators. I said, the more closer you get the four point, the better the car is. Yeah. Incentivize, incentivize. So what's your best advice for you?
• 24:59
  We're a good mix of male and female. I have a 16-year-old daughter. It's absolutely insane, as you know. They live and die by their phones and Snapchat. What advice would you give young Brandy that's coming up in this world right now? As a woman, though, not from a male perspective. So what advice would you give my 16-year-old daughter?
• 25:18
  Oh my gosh. That's a tough one. No, it's not. You're brilliant. First and foremost, I want to make sure that they know that everything online is fake. It's all fake. Don't compare yourself to anything.
• 25:34
  Anything and everything online is fake. So anything that I post, it's filtered. Anything you see someone else posting, I guarantee you they tweaked it, they filtered it. So I hate the fact that young girls have to look at these things and compare themselves because I've been guilty of it. I'm like, oh, my God, they look so good. And I have to remind myself it's fake. It's filtered. It's this.
• 25:57
  Like, it's so important. And I'm so guilty of this, but I always say I'm going to cut that damn phone down to one hour a day with that social media because it's brainwashing them. It's killing confidence. It's no good. It is no good. That's not advice. But I would say that, you know, please don't believe in the stuff you're seeing. It's all fake. There's nothing real to it. Just...
• 26:25
  try to stay off it as much as you can, you know, and don't take naked pictures of yourself. Once you put that out there, it's out there forever. I can't even imagine if, you know, when I was younger, if we had social media, oh gosh, that would have been a probably a disaster. Oh, I'd be in prison and not even social media, just the camera everywhere you go. I'd be in trouble.
• 26:49
  That's great advice. Love yourself is really what that advice is. Love yourself. That's what I mean, yes. Nothing external needs to happen for you to be happy. No. I have everything. You have everything that you need inside of you. I love that advice. I love that you were courageous enough to say that. Why do women do that these days? Look, you can tell it's a filter. Walk me through the psychology of it. I will tell you.
• 27:19
  Because if you don't, everyone, because everybody does, if you're the one that doesn't, all of a sudden, oh, Brandy looks tired. She's looking old. You know, it's that. Look at what happened to Pam Anderson. Pam Anderson decided to no makeup and do this and that. And look what people did to her. They tore her apart.
• 27:44
  For being who she is and not wearing makeup. People tore her apart on social media and everywhere else. How bad she looks. How could she do? So look what she did. She started wearing makeup again and started to do a little filtering. And that's sad. That's what these people nowadays will do. And that's why we have to do it. We have to keep up with the Joneses, so to speak, and do what everybody's doing. Because if you're the one that doesn't, you look like shit.
• 28:09
  You know, not me. I had many positives that came from my rough childhood. And that's one of them. I am in competition with one person, me. And my standards are higher than anybody else's. And I'm going to tell you right now, when we were kids, what was that? I'm rubber and you're glue. Whatever you say to me, bounce off me and sticks to you. I couldn't care less.
• 28:26
  You know what? I'm going to be 50 years old. I am getting old. My hairline is receding. I'm tired. I work. I run several companies. It is exhausting. So I'm going to look tired. But do I need to filter? Do I need to keep up with somebody? Nope. And I've poured that into my daughter. And she doesn't. And as a matter of fact, I'll catch her every once in a while on social media. What were you doing? What was this?
• 28:51
  Sorry, dad. No, no, no. Don't sorry. Just talk to me. I want to have a dialogue about this. And she said the same thing. She said, well, the other girls will rip on me and whatnot. It's like, who cares? I know. It's so tough. You know, we know that. We say who cares. And I say that to my oldest son in particular because he's a little more, cares a little bit more about what people think. I could say that they're teenagers. Yeah.
• 29:18
  And it's everything right now, their peers, you know, what people are saying. And you try to instill that within them. But that's going to come in time. They're not going to just feel that way automatically. I think that comes with time and learning and hurt and all the other things.
• 29:34
  Kindness is so gangster. It literally is. And if you can do anything as well, just be kind. It might kill him with kindness. And it never comes back to hurt you. And the one other thing, too, is what is it? I just put this up. Like being mean and tough and rude is just a mask.
• 29:53
  For a wound. Anybody can be mean. It takes someone big to be kind and treat people. Remember what they used to say when we were kids? Treat people how you want to be treated.
• 30:05
  100% I say that all the time. That should be so true today. And being kind is underrated. And I always tell people, you know, just don't mistake my kindness for weakness, right? Just because you're kind, people like think, Oh, if I'm too kind or too nice, then people are gonna walk all over me.
• 30:27
  Hell no. Again, don't mistake kindness for weakness. You can be a kind, loving, wonderful person and still be tough and hard as nails. And, you know, again, yeah, kindness is underrated. I think that we need to bring it back. Yes, let's do it. I'll do you one more.
• 30:45
  So I'm talking to your sons right now. First of all, have them tune into my Thursday podcasts. I do. I do coaching sessions every Thursday and I just lean into these guys. I have a massive following of 15 to 25 year olds. They, I work out like crazy. I lead by example. You'll never see me lying, cheating, stealing, or doing things out of alignment. But I want to keep going down that path and, and, and,
• 31:12
  Have you ever had to unlearn a belief about beauty or success that Playboy or Hollywood taught you early on? When did you learn your boundaries? You're intelligent, highly intelligent. And if someone got out of line, you'd correct them like that. When did you learn that? Oh, gosh. Sorry. I just, I'm perceptive. This is why I read people. It's how I survived as a child. I, I.
• 31:39
  I don't know. I mean, I honestly, I wish that there was some magic antidote to this. But I mean, I just feel like it's I'm an old soul. And for me, this is my personality. And ever since I was very young, people would be like, gosh, you seem so much older, you know, I just...
• 32:00
  I feel like I've just always had that. And as we age and go through things, it gets fine tuned with every life experience. But I feel like I've always had that real strongness about me. And again, I had a very strong mother and I think she instilled that in me.
• 32:19
  It's high morals and integrity and you exude it and it comes with a lot of no's. So saying no a lot, saying no, and which is a boundary, which is a great standard. What's one no that turned out to be a gift in disguise? Something you said no to. Well, anytime anyone, you know, it's more like, you know, tells you you can't do something.
• 32:44
  You know, that motivates me. Oh, really? Oh, you know, that that gives me motivation. But I would say that there's those situations. I'll give you one. So it impossible only describes the degree of difficulty. And it literally says I'm possible.
• 33:02
  We get a lot of no's, right? Not me saying no to somebody. Don't take no for an answer. When a door closes, find a window to climb through, you know, do all those things others aren't doing. For example, I went in for an audition and the casting director, I looked around, she had this candle burning.
• 33:23
  And I did the audition, whatever. I left and I went and sent a thank you to the cast. Thank you for having me come in. And I sent her that same candle that she had. Right. Just thanking her. I didn't get that part. But lo and behold, guess what? She called me back in to read a week later for another role. And I got that role because I went and did something different that no one else is doing. Same thing happened when I read for Starsky and Hutch.
• 33:53
  I was in the room with Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, and Todd Phillips, the director, Academy Award winning director. As soon as I go in, they're like, oh, we loved you on Surreal Life. And Todd Phillips said, I love Emmanuel Lewis. I was on the Surreal Life with Emmanuel Lewis. And he said, I love him. He's so great. I do the audition. What do I do? As soon as I leave, I call up Manny and say, Manny? Manny.
• 34:19
  You got to give me an autographed photo that says to Todd, you got to hire my girl Brandy. So I put it all together. I sent it to Todd. And guess what? I got the role. Was it my acting chops? Probably. Did that push it over the edge? Maybe if I was competing against someone else, possibly. So, you know, I always do things just a little, go the extra mile to do that so that I don't get those no's.
• 34:44
  Stand out. The audience is getting gems here. I want to bring this back too. Handwritten notes, handwritten thank yous, and phone calls. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, because people are always... Oh, let me shoot a text. Great. Let me shoot a text. Yeah. If your younger self could see your life now, what would surprise her the most? Well, this is getting a little...
• 35:10
  I don't want to be Debbie Downer, but I would think that my younger self would still see me doing all the things I'm doing because I always knew I'd be successful. But having a husband, you know, and not being a single mom, I think that would be probably the one thing that I did not envision. I appreciate you.
• 35:31
  saying the couple of negative things because you people say that to me all the time like you're always positive and i am and then i started sharing some of my down moments so people can see because it's not all rainbows and you it isn't i like i woke up at 2 a.m this morning i'm exhausted but there was no way i was not going to come correct for you and um you know behind the scenes things happen life happens and it's hard and we maneuver through it and it's fun and that's what living is all about because i want to tell you one thing and you can have this one too and
• 36:01
  Everybody says you only live once. No, no, no, no. We only die once. We live every day. So live in daytight compartments. And for yesterday is history. Let that go. Tomorrow is a mystery. Let's just be present in today. And it's a gift. That's why it's called being present.
• 36:18
  100% and I reinvent myself all the time. I can tell. Just like, you know, yes, it was my dream to be married and have my intact family. Yes, but guess what? When that didn't go the way it was supposed to, I have a new dream and I have a new dream
• 36:35
  And now my new dream is to be with my boys and give them 100% of my attention. Whereas before, when I was married, I was not able to give them 100%. And guess what? Now I can because I was giving some of the percentage to him, right? So there's a way to turn things around all the time. Yeah, you just have to create a new dream for yourself.
• 36:56
  I'm going to pop back to Playboy for one more second because I don't feel like I hit that hard enough. So what's the most misunderstood thing about your time in Playboy? It's not my misunderstanding in Playboy. But what I will say is there have been a handful of people that came forward to say some very negative things about Mr. Hefner. And so from that, maybe those people might have a misunderstanding about everybody else's experience, which my experience and.
• 37:22
  I would say 99.9% of the playmates that I know have had a fantastic, life-changing, wonderful, you know, experience and memories from that. All right. I have one more question. And then we have this fun rapid fire we're going to do, because I think it'll be fun with us. Have you ever felt pressure to tone down your femininity, to be taken serious in business or anything?
• 37:48
  Or your beauty. Is there any part of that? No. No. With business, I tone it up. I will tone it up. Say that again. I do not tone it down. But I will tell you where I do have to tone it down. And this could be just me in my head when I'm around other women.
• 38:06
  I do not try to go all out. I don't have the girls out. I don't, because I don't want to make other women feel insecure. They already know here's coming a playmate. You know what I mean? I, so I tone it down in that. Yeah.
• 38:24
  I want to unpack that a little bit because I do that. And why do you think we do that? I have a big persona, big energy. I am short but wide. And when I walk into a room, you feel it. But then you'll see me shrink a little bit.
• 38:42
  And it's one of my biggest pet peeves about myself. I do not want to do that. So what do you. I wish I knew because other people don't. Other people go in and they're like, oh, hello, you know, and. So why do we do that? You know what? It also relates to, you know.
• 39:03
  money. I dumb down certain things with money because when we're growing up, it's like, oh, if you have money, you're an asshole. The only evil people have money, right? Like in all the movies, the evil people had money. So you kind of dumb that down a little bit too. So I do that with my appearance around other women. Think about that. I'm sure a psychologist would know what that's all about. When we get together, let's not play small. Let's not
• 39:30
  Let's not bring it down. Let's go. We'll play big with each other. We'll be playing big. All right. Let's have some fun. I got a bunch of little lightning around. They're just quick, whatever off the top of your head. Just whatever you think of. So your favorite Baywatch memory.
• 39:45
  I have so many. My whole experience on Baywatch was awesome because we were freaking in Hawaii and swimming in the ocean with Jason Momoa and my best friend and just having great times. But it wasn't really maybe on set as much as it was today.
• 40:02
  going out at night with the cast because we became a little family, right? They were just on this little island. So it was just us all the time. So just our little family outings and what we did together, those were my best memories. That's the camaraderie. That's great. Yeah. Hardest lesson learned in Hollywood.
• 40:19
  Oh, I'll tell you. When I got Baywatch as a series regular, I thought, woohoo, I have made it. So when I got the role, when we went to Hawaii, I had this newfound money and I went shopping at all the stores like the Dolce & Gabbana's and Christian Dior and Valentino and bought all the stuff.
• 40:42
  And ended up with basically nothing after the series was done because I thought it was going to be forever. I didn't realize that, oh, you could do a season or two of a show and it gets canceled, you know. So I learned never to just think something's going to be there forever. And don't waste your money on frivolous things. Save, save, save, invest, invest, invest.
• 41:07
  Okay. That's what my next one was best advice ever received. Is that your best advice or is there something better that you've received? No, I mean, I've already talked about my best advice. I always tell people do things other people won't do. If the door closes, find that window to crawl through. But what I would tell...
• 41:27
  my 16 or 18 year old self is to start investing. And I would teach her how to invest, even if it's only putting $250 or $250 a month away, you know, start now, invest in things and put it away and don't think about it. And that's what I would tell my younger self because I wish I had the extra years to have done that. That is really good advice. I want to say one more, invest in yourself.
• 41:53
  Two, that's what I wish I would have done. Self-help books, personal development, you invest in yourself, it pays back. Yes.
• 42:02
  10x all the time. That's what I invest in. I invest in myself. I don't invest in Louis Vuitton or Christian Dior. You know, I invest in myself. So I'll take myself and self-help retreats, whatever it might be, because it's expensive, as you know, to invest in yourself. It ain't cheap. No. So that's my weakness is investing in myself. We talked a lot about your son, but what's one thing you want your sons to know about you when they're older?
• 42:30
  I mean, it's too cliche to say, oh, that everything I do is for you, that everything I did was for you. And, you know, that's too. That's like a cop out because that's true. But something that I would want them to know about me. I don't know. Just I don't know. That's oh, my God. Why am I getting about this one? Let me tell you what I see about you. You are hardworking, kind, loving. Learn it all. Yeah. Yeah.
• 43:00
  All right. Here's an easier one. Heels or sneakers? Flip flops. Best answer ever. You go, girl. Malibu sunset or New York City skyline? Malibu sunset. Oh, I love sunsets. I don't know what it is. Sunrises and sunsets. It just means that I've lived another day. I love sun. I go out and watch sunsets all the time. I love it. Favorite guilty pleasure snack?
• 43:28
  Chocolate peanut butter ice cream and pizza. Those are my two cheat days. I love my pizza and I love my chocolate peanut butter ice cream. Last show you binge watched? Wayward. Most used app on your phone besides Instagram? Airbnb. Really? I'm an Airbnb host. One actor or actress you'd love to work with?
• 43:55
  I've always had a crush on this one. So I'm going to say this, not that she's the best actress and that she does like these crazy, amazing movies. I just am obsessed with her. And that's Angelina Jolie. So you said you had a crush on her. My next one was first celebrity crush.
• 44:13
  Oh, you know how you said, thank God there was a no. This wasn't a no because I get everything I go after, but thank God I didn't pursue it. I was going to marry Russell Crowe. I was like, oh, I'm going to marry Russell Crowe. And have you seen him lately? I'm like, thank God I didn't pursue that. Because when I was saying that, like I even we were at a restaurant together and I was like, oh, there he is. And.
• 44:35
  I then went off to Hawaii and got Baywatch. So I did not pursue it, but I thought, I was like, oh, I'm going to marry him. Wait a minute. That was like my first crush, I guess. If you love Angelina Jolie, how was it not Brad Pitt? Oh, I was, yeah. Brad Pitt was in there too. But I didn't say to myself, I'm going to marry Brad Pitt. I wanted to do something else with Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt.
• 44:59
  But but Angelina Jolie has my I'm just like, that's just I don't know what it is about her. I just I just want to be I want to be around her and meet her and just she's just so eccentric. I don't know. There's something about her. What's the best piece of advice you received from Hugh Hefner?
• 45:18
  Yes, I have it, but I don't want to butcher it. It's going to be good. Okay. It's something that everybody says, but it's luck is what happens when preparation and hard work come together.
• 45:33
  That's a good one. So I love when he would say that because that is how I feel, right? And there is no one – he'd say you're not lucky. No one's lucky. You create that by being prepared and working hard, and then the luck will follow. This one's a good one. What's one thing people would be surprised to know you're afraid of? I mean, I don't know if this isn't surprising. I mean, the one thing I'm afraid of is heights.
• 45:58
  As I've gotten older, I get afraid. We just rented a penthouse in Florida and I can't go out in the balcony. I'm the same way. I cannot. I hate it. I go like this and look over. But no, I hate heights. I don't know what it is. It's something about being older. Most underrated moment of your career?
• 46:16
  I mean, I wouldn't call this underrated, but I did a Bollywood film. I was the very first American actress to do a Bollywood film. I had to do the film. I had to speak Hindi in a lot of it. I had to sing and dance in Hindi. And I worked 18-hour days and was in freezing cold in the snow in the Swiss Alps, wearing basically close to nothing, doing dance dance.
• 46:44
  moves doing a music video for it. People might not know the hard work that went into making this Bollywood film. Dogs or cats? Dogs 100%. Coffee order, basic or bougie?
• 46:58
  I would call it white trash. It's regular coffee. It doesn't matter what it is. As long as I have my crappy vanilla creamer, no bougie soy or oat or whatever. No, I want the freaking whatever sugar in there. The real freaking sugar. He said white trash.
• 47:21
  That's how I grew up. You cracking me up. Hey, you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. Best part. Best part. You're saving all the best for last. What's a word your kids use that you still don't fully understand?
• 47:37
  There's probably a lot of them and I don't remember them, so I can't relate it to you. But one word that I now learned is the huss. And you can't say husses. You say huss. Even if plural, it's huss. Mom, we got to go to the mall because we got to check out the huss.
• 47:55
  It's not husses. It's huss. What is it? The hotties. Now it's the huss. I learned the riz for charisma. So I didn't know huss was hotties. That's interesting. What's something you're unapologetically obsessed with right now? I'm unapologetic with...
• 48:15
  Self-improvement and taking the time for myself, my hour in the morning that is just for me to do my routine that needs to get me to where I need to be to be 100% throughout the day. I'm unapologetic for taking that time.
• 48:31
  Well, this has been a gem. There is so many pieces that you just sprinkled in to help people be successful and win. And you're 50. Life is half over, but I think it's just beginning. And we're able to, we're going to live well into our hundreds. So I'm excited to see what's next for you. You brought the fire today. Reminded us what?
• 48:53
  confidence, hustle, and authenticity that never go out of style. Whether you're in the middle of a comeback or just getting started, take a page from what she said, bet on yourself. And until next time, stay bold, stay real, and keep living hard in life.
• 49:10
  Please rate and share this podcast. I'm active on all social platforms and love to hear from my Segal supporters. Each and every episode is sponsored by my company, National Technology Management, the easiest and best IT company to do business with. Delivering peace of mind with technology every day, even simplifying cybersecurity. Visit TrustNTM.com for more info. Until next week, be harder than life.