Latest / The World of Phil Hendrie / Episode #3851 The New Phil Hendrie Show Radio Archive Hour

Transcript

Episode #3851 The New Phil Hendrie Show Radio Archive Hour · The World of Phil Hendrie

0:00
Speaker 1: Do we go. Hi, everybody, it's Ted Bell. You know
0:02
Speaker 1: me from Tedjia, Beverly Hills. There's been a while since
0:04
Speaker 1: I've been on here, you know, endorsing the world famous
0:07
Speaker 1: Phil Henry Show webcast in the podcast you know, his website,
0:11
Speaker 1: and I've been doing that for filled for a lot
0:13
Speaker 1: of years. On today's show, against my best wishes, against
0:17
Speaker 1: my I guess by very very dear exhortations, I said,
0:20
Speaker 1: please don't do it. He's going to be featuring a
0:22
Speaker 1: show about my nephew cutting, you know, a fart into
0:26
Speaker 1: the leather of my let of cough. I know, I
0:29
Speaker 1: got it, Brent, into the leather of my car. Anyway,
0:32
Speaker 1: get a backstage pass to the world famous Phil Henry
0:35
Speaker 1: Show because as he destroys my automobile with the story
0:37
Speaker 1: of my nephew blast in one and my nephew's now
0:40
Speaker 1: in his thirties.
0:42
Speaker 2: Anyway, Okay, thanks and things.
0:44
Speaker 1: Let Ted, you are right right, Okay, thanks, looked at it.
0:48
Speaker 2: Anyway, get a backstage pass to the world famous Phil
0:50
Speaker 2: Henry Show. A Phil Hendryshow dot com. It's the greatest
0:52
Speaker 2: value online other than porn.
0:54
Speaker 1: And what about the never mind?
0:56
Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, it's Phil Henry here, this is a really
0:58
Speaker 2: great radio ARCHI show we have for you from January
1:01
Speaker 2: of two thousand and two. This is our character Ted
1:04
Speaker 2: Bell from Ted's Beverly Hill Steakhouse. Ted started life as
1:08
Speaker 2: a dentist in Atlanta, but we morphed him into a
1:11
Speaker 2: guy who owns a restaurant. Anyway, Ted was complaining about
1:14
Speaker 2: his nephew farting into his car and this got a
1:18
Speaker 2: lot of people calling and complaining. Ted Bell is played
1:21
Speaker 2: by me. The people that call are real people who
1:24
Speaker 2: thought Ted was a real jackass and needed to be
1:27
Speaker 2: cut down to size, which frankly I agree with.
1:31
Speaker 3: This is the Phil Henry Shell.
1:37
Speaker 2: Ted's of Steakhouse.
1:41
Speaker 1: Come on, Dad, that's right, everybody, come on down to
1:44
Speaker 1: tedge Beverly Hill Steakhouse. You've got some of the thickest,
1:47
Speaker 1: most delicious, thickest, biggest pieces of meat. Stick it in
1:52
Speaker 1: your mouth. That Ted be Beverly Hills.
1:56
Speaker 3: Do you want to boot.
1:57
Speaker 2: On me in your mouth?
2:00
Speaker 1: Hills, Beverly Hill.
2:01
Speaker 2: All right, and Ted, you're with us, and thank you
2:03
Speaker 2: for joining us. And a happy New Year to your pal.
2:05
Speaker 1: Happy new Year to you, Phil, and to everybody. I
2:08
Speaker 1: just want to invite everybody, of course to go down
2:10
Speaker 1: to Teds whenever they can and have a great steak dinner.
2:12
Speaker 2: Ted Although you also are with the Beverly Hills Automobile Association,
2:16
Speaker 2: an association of men who own what you call HPVs.
2:21
Speaker 1: High performance vehicles. That's correct.
2:23
Speaker 3: What is a high performance vehicle?
2:25
Speaker 1: Well, I can tell you, for instance, a high performance
2:27
Speaker 1: vehicle is an example of that would be a car
2:30
Speaker 1: that I purchased two weeks ago, as a matter of fact,
2:33
Speaker 1: a Vandad Blah, which is a Jaguar. It is vandan Blah.
2:38
Speaker 1: It is German and it is the Jaguar, of course
2:41
Speaker 1: has a British traditional but vandan Blaw is a German phrase.
2:45
Speaker 1: Three hundred and seventy horse, absolutely gorgeous, chrome wheels, GPS
2:50
Speaker 1: navigational system, a very quick and very lovely automobile. And
2:54
Speaker 1: we did purchase this two weeks ago over the holidays.
2:59
Speaker 1: We had some problem And this is one of the
3:01
Speaker 1: things I wanted to talk to your audience about the
3:03
Speaker 1: resale value on a car. I don't lease, I buy,
3:06
Speaker 1: and the resale value on a car can be affected
3:10
Speaker 1: by the new car smell.
3:11
Speaker 2: And I'm sure you know what it's oh new car
3:13
Speaker 2: smell is. My wife just bought a car. New car
3:16
Speaker 2: smell is is everything people love that.
3:18
Speaker 1: I'll tell you how much people love it feels. It
3:20
Speaker 1: is said to be worth three thousand dollars on the
3:24
Speaker 1: resale if it still has that new car smell. I
3:27
Speaker 1: purchased a Van Dan Blood Jaguar eighty five thousand dollars
3:32
Speaker 1: worth of car.
3:32
Speaker 2: Now ted when you talk about hold on, I just
3:35
Speaker 2: want I want to tell you about the car.
3:36
Speaker 1: Eighty five thousand dollar car. My wife's sister and her son,
3:44
Speaker 1: my nephew, come over for New Year's Day and we
3:50
Speaker 1: have dinner, and my wife suggested Beth and her son
3:54
Speaker 1: come out and take a look at the new car.
3:57
Speaker 1: And already I'm beginning to feel something is quite right
4:02
Speaker 1: because my wife's sister is not exactly a big fan
4:04
Speaker 1: of mine. Now I'm talking about anybody in your listing audience, Bill,
4:09
Speaker 1: who knows anything about cars. The new cars smell. Now,
4:13
Speaker 1: this is worth about three thousand dollars. As I said,
4:15
Speaker 1: I don't expect anybody in your audience to know what
4:17
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. When I talk about the Jaguar Van.
4:19
Speaker 1: They have lot three hundred and seventy horse this is well, there.
4:22
Speaker 2: May be some people out there that own one. I
4:23
Speaker 2: understand it's an expensive car, right.
4:25
Speaker 1: It's eighty five thousand dollars. Now, I want you to
4:30
Speaker 1: sit back and think about that, and everybody listening to me,
4:33
Speaker 1: you think about it and ask yourself, just how many
4:36
Speaker 1: more years do you have to work before you can
4:38
Speaker 1: afford a car like that. The nephew gets in my car,
4:43
Speaker 1: I take him for a drive. I should have known better.
4:48
Speaker 1: He's a six year old boy and he's just had dinner.
4:52
Speaker 1: The kid had gas, he.
4:55
Speaker 3: Had get what he he kind of fart or something.
4:58
Speaker 1: The kid had gas, Yeah, released gash in the car.
5:01
Speaker 1: That's three thousand dollars that went flying out the window.
5:04
Speaker 1: Now before that, Yeah, but this is a ted.
5:06
Speaker 3: This is a six year old boy.
5:07
Speaker 1: Before you start talking to me about how old he is,
5:09
Speaker 1: I want you to know something. I realized it for
5:13
Speaker 1: It sounds silly, but the sister never liked me. The
5:18
Speaker 1: fact is she was talking to the boy before he
5:20
Speaker 1: got ted. Come on, she was talking to the boy
5:23
Speaker 1: before he got into the car. When I'm talking about
5:25
Speaker 1: Phil is purposeful damage to a brand new car that
5:29
Speaker 1: I believe someone should be held responsible for.
5:32
Speaker 2: Ted, the kid is six years old. What do you
5:35
Speaker 2: mean she was telling you? You're telling me that the ant,
5:38
Speaker 2: that the ant. This is your sister in law, right,
5:40
Speaker 2: my sister in law.
5:40
Speaker 1: My nephew.
5:41
Speaker 3: What is his name?
5:43
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. It's Harold or Aldan, I don't know.
5:49
Speaker 1: I forget his name.
5:50
Speaker 3: This is your nephew, yes, and you don't know his name.
5:54
Speaker 1: We are not close to this part of the family
5:56
Speaker 1: field for a lot of reasons. She never wanted me
5:58
Speaker 1: to marry your sister, etcetera. I don't want to bore
5:59
Speaker 1: you or the audience with the tails. The fact of
6:01
Speaker 1: the matter is, I believe this was purposeful damage to
6:03
Speaker 1: a brand spanking new automobile. And what I very respectfully
6:07
Speaker 1: requested from her that when she got back to her
6:10
Speaker 1: home she reviewed her finances, that we can work something
6:12
Speaker 1: got financially. She is not married. This is a single
6:16
Speaker 1: parent household. I did issue corporal punishment on this boy,
6:22
Speaker 1: I did.
6:22
Speaker 3: Did you what? Did you hit the kid?
6:25
Speaker 1: Yes? I spanked him. Yeah.
6:27
Speaker 3: And if this is not your kid, and you spanked.
6:29
Speaker 1: Him, whoa whoa whoa? Fill of it? Now hold on for.
6:31
Speaker 2: Minute, Ted, you you spanked somebody else's kid, You're getting
6:35
Speaker 2: into some trouble here, all right.
6:37
Speaker 1: This is my nephew number one, mister Henry, and number two.
6:40
Speaker 1: The kid willfully released gas fart or whatever you want
6:45
Speaker 1: to call it, into a brand spanking new car. The
6:48
Speaker 1: new car smell is worth three thousand dollars. Now, the
6:51
Speaker 1: fact of the matter is this is a single parent home.
6:53
Speaker 1: The boy has no man in his life. He doesn't
6:56
Speaker 1: have proper discipline, and I issued the corporal punishment that
6:59
Speaker 1: I'm sure his would have had his mother gotten married
7:03
Speaker 1: to a man before she had the boy.
7:05
Speaker 2: Obviously, there is some bad blood between you and this woman.
7:09
Speaker 1: You're better believe it. And the fact of the matter
7:12
Speaker 1: is three thousand dollars goes flying out the window as
7:16
Speaker 1: that kid's fart fills the inside of it. And I
7:19
Speaker 1: can tell you, Phil, because I've owned expensive cars before.
7:23
Speaker 1: When you get rid of that new car smell, especially
7:26
Speaker 1: when a six year old boy releases noxious egg smelling.
7:30
Speaker 2: Farts, Look at man, you don't need to explain or describe, Okay.
7:34
Speaker 3: You can.
7:35
Speaker 1: Well, I've owned expensive cars by entire life. Now I've
7:38
Speaker 1: told her to review her finances and we're gonna have
7:41
Speaker 1: to work something out.
7:42
Speaker 2: Well, to get a woman who this is a single
7:45
Speaker 2: parent family, to get this woman to cough up three
7:47
Speaker 2: thousand dollars because a six year old boy had an accident.
7:51
Speaker 1: I'm not buying the accident.
7:54
Speaker 3: Well, Ted, I'm gonna tell you it verges on paranoid.
7:56
Speaker 1: No, it's not paranoid. She doesn't like me. She whispered
7:59
Speaker 1: something to the kid and she was rubbing his stomach.
8:02
Speaker 1: I know exactly what this is.
8:03
Speaker 3: So she said, get.
8:03
Speaker 2: Into the car, and when you get into Uncle Ted's car,
8:07
Speaker 2: fart and that'll destroy the new car smell.
8:10
Speaker 1: I don't know what she said exactly, that was the intent.
8:14
Speaker 1: I believe she told the boy to do it.
8:15
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then you spanked him.
8:17
Speaker 1: Yes, I did. Let me tell you something, Phil, this
8:22
Speaker 1: is a single mother family, a single parent family. Okay,
8:25
Speaker 1: part are we going to talk about high performance vehicles?
8:27
Speaker 2: How do we get into this discussion with him about
8:29
Speaker 2: some kid farting in his car?
8:32
Speaker 3: Now?
8:32
Speaker 2: I know what he means by new car smell. Anybody
8:36
Speaker 2: that's ever owned a new car you know what that is.
8:39
Speaker 2: I seriously doubt if it's worth three thousand dollars under resale.
8:43
Speaker 2: And why would a guy like you, Ted, if I
8:44
Speaker 2: could just ask you, why don't you lease.
8:46
Speaker 1: I don't like to lease. I like to own. I
8:48
Speaker 1: like to own a car for as long as I
8:50
Speaker 1: like to own it. I like to put whatever kind
8:52
Speaker 1: of interest in terms of mechanical repair or enhancement that
8:55
Speaker 1: I want into the automobile, and then I want to
8:57
Speaker 1: sell it. I'm not looking to make a lot of money,
8:59
Speaker 1: but I am looking to make fair market value. And
9:01
Speaker 1: when you destroy the new car smelled.
9:03
Speaker 2: This was a six year old boy who had a
9:05
Speaker 2: gas problem, who cut a fart or whatever you want
9:08
Speaker 2: to call it in the car.
9:09
Speaker 1: If that was all it was, Phil, I wouldn't have
9:11
Speaker 1: a problem that sister in law of mine, who never
9:15
Speaker 1: liked me, didn't want me to marry her sister and
9:18
Speaker 1: tells her kid to get into my car and make
9:21
Speaker 1: a dirty and Uncle Ted's car. Because I know that's
9:25
Speaker 1: what she said.
9:27
Speaker 3: You know that for a fact.
9:28
Speaker 1: I can well imagine she tells the kid, I don't
9:31
Speaker 1: know the boy's day.
9:32
Speaker 3: This is your nephew. Why don't you know his name?
9:34
Speaker 1: I told you, Phil, I'm not close to the family.
9:38
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. But when she says, damn you get an
9:41
Speaker 1: Uncle Ted's car, it make a noddy.
9:45
Speaker 3: And that'll make the resale value go down the toilet.
9:47
Speaker 1: I don't know if she said that or not.
9:49
Speaker 3: I'm sure she didn't.
9:51
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get my money out of a car that
9:53
Speaker 1: smells like a slaughterhouse. I'm gonna get my money out
9:56
Speaker 1: of a car that smells like an outhouse. I don't
9:58
Speaker 1: think so.
10:00
Speaker 3: Well.
10:00
Speaker 2: Asking a single mother to come up with three thousand
10:02
Speaker 2: dollars on your automobile, okay, because.
10:05
Speaker 1: Yeah, my automobile, the car that her nephew purposefully destroyed
10:09
Speaker 1: by releasing fart okay and ruining the new car smell.
10:17
Speaker 3: Well, I don't know what a new car. You say
10:18
Speaker 3: it's worth three thousand.
10:19
Speaker 1: Three thousand dollars new car smell absolutely So the upshot
10:23
Speaker 1: is I'm going to turn the car back and I
10:25
Speaker 1: hope they'll give me another one. It's only got about
10:27
Speaker 1: a thousand miles on it. There is a Lemon law
10:28
Speaker 1: in the state of California which says, if you're unhappy
10:30
Speaker 1: with the car, you can get your money back, you
10:32
Speaker 1: can get a new one.
10:34
Speaker 2: Well, that's not exactly what the Lemon law says. You
10:36
Speaker 2: have to be and you have to bring it back.
10:38
Speaker 2: A number of times.
10:39
Speaker 1: Okay, well, I lost three grand in the car. If
10:41
Speaker 1: they don't want to take the car back, then she's
10:42
Speaker 1: got to work off the three thousand dollars in the restaurant.
10:44
Speaker 1: I've asked her if she'll go to work. I've asked
10:46
Speaker 1: her if she will do something either taking the kitchen
10:49
Speaker 1: slats out, scrubbing them down, put the boy to work, whatever.
10:52
Speaker 1: But three thousand dollars, just because I happen to be
10:56
Speaker 1: a wealthy man, it's still a lot of money. And
10:59
Speaker 1: the fact of the matter of that, just because you're rich,
11:02
Speaker 1: it doesn't mean people get to take advantage of you.
11:04
Speaker 2: Boy, do you sound angry over the fact that a
11:05
Speaker 2: little kid farted in your car? Philp Just hold on
11:09
Speaker 2: for a minute. Okay, look it, I got kids, man,
11:12
Speaker 2: They're farting in my car all the time. I kissed
11:14
Speaker 2: my new car smell goodbye, months years ago. Now I
11:19
Speaker 2: understand he's got an eighty five thousand dollars car, but
11:21
Speaker 2: a little boy is going to be a little boy.
11:24
Speaker 2: He wants the mother of that kid to work off
11:26
Speaker 2: the three grand that he lost on resale value because
11:29
Speaker 2: the boy farted in his car and destroyed the new car.
11:33
Speaker 2: Smell now this is a what is it, Craig, It's
11:36
Speaker 2: a Jaguar Van dan blo. It's a three hundred and
11:38
Speaker 2: seventy horse performance package. YadA, YadA, YadA, Phil Henry Show,
11:49
Speaker 2: The Phil Henry.
11:50
Speaker 3: Show is bad.
11:52
Speaker 4: The car.
11:52
Speaker 1: She could cover the restaurant and work it off this Hello,
11:56
Speaker 1: oh what happened to you?
11:58
Speaker 2: I don't know my microphone was. The thing of it
12:00
Speaker 2: is said, is that you are asking a mother, a
12:03
Speaker 2: single mother too. Is she a professional person right now?
12:06
Speaker 1: She's not right now, she's quote between jobs. So these
12:09
Speaker 1: are the things that I think are unusual.
12:12
Speaker 3: What does she do for a living?
12:13
Speaker 1: She's an actress, so well, actresses and actors.
12:16
Speaker 3: Often don't work continuously. They're between jobs.
12:19
Speaker 1: Point being that that's three thousand bucks that that kid
12:22
Speaker 1: farted right out of my car. And you can make
12:25
Speaker 1: all the jokes you want, and you can think it's
12:27
Speaker 1: as funny as hell, but that is an automobile that
12:30
Speaker 1: sustained damage is the result of some kid sitting down
12:33
Speaker 1: in the bucket seats of my brand new Van dan
12:35
Speaker 1: Blah three hundred and seventy horse power eighty five thousand
12:39
Speaker 1: dollars car, lifting up one cheek, letting it fire and
12:44
Speaker 1: looking at me with a little look on his cute
12:46
Speaker 1: like hi, you know, like, isn't he a cute little nephew.
12:49
Speaker 3: You don't even know the name of the kid.
12:51
Speaker 1: Man.
12:51
Speaker 3: I doubt very seriously whether you care at all about
12:54
Speaker 3: that boy.
12:55
Speaker 1: Here is Betty, Well, maybe I do and maybe I don't.
12:57
Speaker 3: Here is Betty on the Phil Henry Show. Betty, go ahead.
13:00
Speaker 4: You know what I think that guy's put on.
13:02
Speaker 5: He's a jackass.
13:05
Speaker 1: I'm a jackass. Yes, you are, all right, Betty, You're
13:08
Speaker 1: a jackass. Nice talking, do you?
13:11
Speaker 4: Well? You are you real proud of yourself? Or you
13:13
Speaker 4: just calling in to let everybody know what you say.
13:15
Speaker 1: I'm going because they wanted me to talk about high
13:18
Speaker 1: performance vehicles, and Betty, I don't know whether you know
13:21
Speaker 1: what a eighty five thousand dollars car is. Yes, I
13:24
Speaker 1: it's a very expensive car.
13:26
Speaker 4: I'm sick of hair.
13:26
Speaker 1: And you say that it happens to be an eighty
13:29
Speaker 1: five thousand.
13:30
Speaker 3: You told us already.
13:31
Speaker 1: Man, Okay, that's right, And I'm saying it to press
13:35
Speaker 1: home the point that when that child got into my
13:37
Speaker 1: car and decided that he was going to do a
13:40
Speaker 1: dirty or whatever he wants to call it. Oh, come on,
13:43
Speaker 1: you don't know anything about cars?
13:45
Speaker 4: I certainly do you know.
13:47
Speaker 1: What a new car spell is?
13:48
Speaker 5: Yes? I do.
13:49
Speaker 4: I've had a lot of new car.
13:50
Speaker 1: It doesn't smell like petuli oil, which is probably what
13:53
Speaker 1: you put on every morning. This is it?
13:54
Speaker 3: All right? You know you don't need to go there. Okay,
13:56
Speaker 3: you don't need to start instelling people personally.
13:58
Speaker 1: Well, she doesn't know what a new car is?
14:00
Speaker 5: Oh, come on, how do you know?
14:02
Speaker 1: Because I doubt very seriously whether you know what it is.
14:04
Speaker 1: If you don't know what it's.
14:05
Speaker 4: Worth, you gotta be kidding.
14:08
Speaker 1: No.
14:08
Speaker 4: Do you think you are the only person who can
14:11
Speaker 4: afford a new car and pay a lot of money
14:14
Speaker 4: of the two of us?
14:14
Speaker 1: Yes? Okay, Well, like.
14:17
Speaker 4: I said, I think you're a big jacket Kenny.
14:19
Speaker 1: You're so used to depend you wouldn't know what a
14:21
Speaker 1: part Okay for crying out loud? Why why? Why am
14:25
Speaker 1: I supposed to sit here and talk?
14:26
Speaker 2: You're supposed to answer the questions and talk to the
14:29
Speaker 2: people about the stuff that they want to talk about.
14:31
Speaker 2: I don't know what anybody's particular agenda may or may
14:34
Speaker 2: not be. Claudia, you're on the phil Henry show go.
14:36
Speaker 4: Ahead, Hi, and the fact that you hit the kid
14:40
Speaker 4: and Eddy there all right here, I just wanted to say,
14:43
Speaker 4: you know, I have two kids. I drive a forty
14:46
Speaker 4: thousand dollars vehicle, and my kids keep my car clean
14:49
Speaker 4: because I asked them to keep it clean.
14:51
Speaker 1: Well, that's different from a eighty five thousand dollars high
14:53
Speaker 1: performance Jaguar.
14:54
Speaker 4: It's not that big of a difference, okay, I thrive
14:57
Speaker 4: expense is nice to myself.
14:59
Speaker 1: Yes, it is is a big difference. Listen, Yeah, if
15:02
Speaker 1: you have a six forty thousand dollars car, you got
15:05
Speaker 1: an explorer, Explorer something. No, it's not a Ford, okay,
15:08
Speaker 1: Cherokee or something.
15:09
Speaker 3: No, can you just let her finish? Okay?
15:12
Speaker 4: Listen, you got a six year old little boy in
15:14
Speaker 4: the car. I do not believe that he passed gas
15:16
Speaker 4: in your car intentionally.
15:17
Speaker 1: His his mother's. She was whispering to the boy before
15:21
Speaker 1: he got in the car. And the woman doesn't like me,
15:24
Speaker 1: all right.
15:24
Speaker 4: He probably told him to be good.
15:26
Speaker 1: And whether he did it on purpose, and whether he
15:28
Speaker 1: did it on purpose or not, it it three thousand
15:31
Speaker 1: dollars of new car smell is now farted right out
15:34
Speaker 1: of a brand new eighty five thousands.
15:35
Speaker 4: What else I have to say about your three thousand dollars?
15:38
Speaker 1: You are the new car smell is worth.
15:40
Speaker 3: Listen, look at everybody knows what new car smell is.
15:43
Speaker 1: I'm the problem with today's society that I value.
15:45
Speaker 4: We're gonna sue a workless.
15:48
Speaker 1: I was suing, did I start? I was suing?
15:50
Speaker 4: Well, you said you're gonna make her work it off.
15:52
Speaker 1: Yes, I am here for you in my restaurant.
15:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, in your restaurant.
15:56
Speaker 1: Hey the braaklass. Hey, Claudia, here's the first thing, because
16:00
Speaker 1: you drive a car with a cloth interior seat.
16:02
Speaker 4: No, you don't know what all leather a sunroof. It
16:05
Speaker 4: is a very expensive car, and it's.
16:07
Speaker 1: None of yours is a sunroof something, but your brother
16:10
Speaker 1: in law cut through the top of it with a tree.
16:12
Speaker 4: Thousand dollars for a car. You want to rub it
16:14
Speaker 4: in everybody's face because some car, some kid puut it
16:17
Speaker 4: in your car. I want to know when you have
16:19
Speaker 4: to pass gas, you pull over and get out and
16:21
Speaker 4: start there and then get back in the car.
16:23
Speaker 1: I happen to use what's called a bathroom, Claudia, And
16:26
Speaker 1: I don't know whether you happen.
16:27
Speaker 4: If you pass gas. The only person in the world
16:31
Speaker 4: who doesn't pass gas.
16:32
Speaker 3: This woman asked a very good question.
16:33
Speaker 2: If you've got a fart and you're sitting in your
16:35
Speaker 2: eighty five thousand dollars car, what do you do?
16:38
Speaker 1: I use a bathroom, but you have to burp?
16:40
Speaker 5: Is it the same thing?
16:42
Speaker 6: And how long?
16:44
Speaker 1: First of all, there is a product.
16:45
Speaker 4: There is a diarrhea in his pant nobody's.
16:49
Speaker 1: There is a product called bino, and what it does
16:52
Speaker 1: is it inhibits a gas pino to a six.
16:54
Speaker 4: Year old child. Man here, you must be single and
16:57
Speaker 4: have no children.
16:58
Speaker 1: I happen to have a white of course, that's one
17:01
Speaker 1: of many stupid things you've said. I happen to have
17:03
Speaker 1: a wife and two sons, and.
17:05
Speaker 4: You give Obviously you're not a very understanding father.
17:09
Speaker 1: I would tell you this one. I would put a
17:11
Speaker 1: funnel in a kid's mouth and pour six bodels of
17:14
Speaker 1: bino down his throat if he'd rather kill.
17:16
Speaker 4: Your child without what you're trying to say, because you
17:18
Speaker 4: don't want him to wrap yours. I ask you a question, materialistic.
17:22
Speaker 1: Can I ask you a question? Does it make my
17:24
Speaker 1: wife bad that she willingly and and and voluntarily takes
17:27
Speaker 1: a bino before she gets in the car.
17:29
Speaker 4: That's your wife, that's not me.
17:31
Speaker 2: Wait a minute, Wait a minute, I gotta ask you
17:32
Speaker 2: this question. What your wife takes a bino.
17:35
Speaker 1: As I do.
17:36
Speaker 4: Yes, Well, that's fine and reasonino. But you're talking about
17:40
Speaker 4: a six year old little boy who could have had
17:42
Speaker 4: a hot dog for lunch and it upset his stomach.
17:45
Speaker 4: It's not like he did diarrhya in your car, and
17:47
Speaker 4: the smell is in there for months. And if you
17:49
Speaker 4: think you're gonna take your car back to the dealership
17:51
Speaker 4: and get a new one, you're out of your mind
17:52
Speaker 4: because you're gonna last.
17:54
Speaker 1: Well, Claudia, you're a real exper You're an expert on
17:57
Speaker 1: a lot of things. You know, you're an expert on
17:58
Speaker 1: new cars. You're an expert kids farting, Well, you're probably
18:01
Speaker 1: an expert on that because you don't care about the
18:03
Speaker 1: clothed interior Jeep Cherokee that you drive.
18:05
Speaker 4: I do not drive a Jeep Cherokee. It is the
18:08
Speaker 4: forty thousand dollars leather all limited vehicle, and it is
18:12
Speaker 4: not a Ford, and it is not a key.
18:13
Speaker 1: What kind of car is it?
18:14
Speaker 4: Just out of curiosity, what kind of car is it's
18:16
Speaker 4: a miss Montero sport.
18:18
Speaker 1: Look at if you want to talk real car or
18:20
Speaker 1: rice rocket, we can talk real.
18:22
Speaker 4: Car, right, not sorry that I'm not mister rich who
18:25
Speaker 4: wants to three thousand dollars on a car, put a
18:29
Speaker 4: little fine tuning it and sell it for what ninety thousand?
18:32
Speaker 4: Rip somebody else?
18:33
Speaker 1: Off, Rip someone else.
18:35
Speaker 2: By the way, Jaguar ain't exactly what I call an
18:37
Speaker 2: all American car.
18:39
Speaker 4: The British maid don't hand me that crap.
18:42
Speaker 1: Well, wait a minute. There is a sticker on my
18:47
Speaker 1: window that says PHENO required before entry. You want to
18:50
Speaker 1: know why. Yes, And people think it's a joke. No,
18:52
Speaker 1: people think it's a joke. But it's because you put
18:56
Speaker 1: a little.
18:57
Speaker 4: Two dollars sticker on your vehicle. How fresh.
19:02
Speaker 2: You got an eighty five thousand dollars car, you're putting
19:03
Speaker 2: bumper stickers on it.
19:04
Speaker 1: It's about a bumper sticker. It is a sticker asking
19:08
Speaker 1: individuals that get into my car to take any gas
19:11
Speaker 1: prohibiting medications. They've got a whole.
19:13
Speaker 4: Bunch of crap. That's what this story sounds like.
19:17
Speaker 1: All right, Well, let's fine. I did not come on
19:19
Speaker 1: this program to talk about this mister Henry asked me
19:21
Speaker 1: to talk about about.
19:22
Speaker 4: The high performance vehicle. I want to know how fast
19:25
Speaker 4: that can car.
19:26
Speaker 1: Goes seventy horsepower? I can top two hour, I can
19:29
Speaker 1: top two hundred hour.
19:31
Speaker 4: Talking about you're talking about a child a little time.
19:35
Speaker 1: Why should I talk about a car that I won't
19:38
Speaker 1: own for much longer because I gotta jump it for
19:40
Speaker 1: about ten grand less than I bought it for.
19:42
Speaker 4: Because you take it to court. If I was your
19:49
Speaker 4: sister in law or whatever she is, I would say,
19:51
Speaker 4: you know what, you can just take me to court
19:53
Speaker 4: over that three thousand dollars little I.
19:55
Speaker 1: Don't believe she wants to do that because I can
19:57
Speaker 1: afford a lot more lawyers than she can.
19:59
Speaker 4: And I have to look at you, and you'll go
20:01
Speaker 4: to the judge, and the judge will look at you
20:03
Speaker 4: and say, you know what, you are a fool?
20:04
Speaker 1: Oh So, in other words, nobody cares about a man's
20:07
Speaker 1: love of a high performance vehicle.
20:09
Speaker 3: Look, and no judge is gonna want to listen to yourself.
20:11
Speaker 3: Nobody your story.
20:12
Speaker 1: Okay, do you own a Jaguar? No? Do you want
20:16
Speaker 1: a Jaguar, mister Henry, No, I own a Jaguar three
20:18
Speaker 1: hundred and seventy horse power Jaguar. This thick is a
20:21
Speaker 1: high performance vehicle.
20:23
Speaker 3: Bill Henry Show.
20:24
Speaker 1: And another thing.
20:29
Speaker 3: The Phil Henry Show is.
20:30
Speaker 2: That back here with Ted Bell from Ted's Beverly Hill Steakhouse.
20:33
Speaker 2: I'm not even going to get into the whole story
20:34
Speaker 2: about the the nephew farting.
20:37
Speaker 1: Well, Phil, I don't want to be minimized, alright. I
20:38
Speaker 1: think I have a right to express my disappointment in
20:42
Speaker 1: the fact that I launched three thousand dollars.
20:44
Speaker 2: Three thousand dollars on the new car smell because your
20:47
Speaker 2: your your nephew farted in the car.
20:49
Speaker 3: What I want to comment on, though, is that you struck.
20:52
Speaker 1: This boy, Phil, I really resent you using the word strike.
20:56
Speaker 3: Well, did you spank him?
20:57
Speaker 1: I spanked the boy, Yes, I did. I am the
21:00
Speaker 1: boy's uncle. I am the only male figure in that
21:02
Speaker 1: boy's life. He doesn't have a father because his mother
21:05
Speaker 1: decided she wanted to do the single parent thing, which
21:08
Speaker 1: I don't know when they're not, whether you're aware of
21:09
Speaker 1: it or not. This is when a lot of these women,
21:12
Speaker 1: many of them feminists, they think that men are dispensable.
21:16
Speaker 1: They have their single boy, they have the one kid,
21:18
Speaker 1: they go to a clinic and they have someone pump
21:23
Speaker 1: the seed into him and the next thing you know,
21:25
Speaker 1: they're knocked up by a test tube instead of a man,
21:29
Speaker 1: and they've got a kid.
21:31
Speaker 3: But that doesn't give you the right to hit the kid.
21:33
Speaker 1: He fighted in my car.
21:35
Speaker 3: I don't care. He's not your kid.
21:37
Speaker 1: I'm his uncle.
21:39
Speaker 3: You're his uncle.
21:40
Speaker 1: That is exactly right. That gives me the single mothers
21:43
Speaker 1: allow their boys to rule a household because they're afraid
21:45
Speaker 1: of them. I'm the only male figure. I'll tell you
21:47
Speaker 1: so right now. I looked at that kid, and you
21:49
Speaker 1: don't even know his name, do you? You know, Phil?
21:53
Speaker 3: You don't even know his name? Do you? I forgot
21:55
Speaker 3: you forgot your nephew's name.
21:58
Speaker 1: I looked at that kid, and I said, eighty five
22:01
Speaker 1: thousand dollars, car, You think you're gonna take three thousand
22:04
Speaker 1: dollars out of my pocket, shove it up the crack
22:06
Speaker 1: of your rear end and let gas on it. It's
22:09
Speaker 1: not gonna happen. And that's what I paddled him on
22:11
Speaker 1: the rear end. He's six years old. I gave him
22:13
Speaker 1: three healthy squats on the butt. He didn't bruise and
22:16
Speaker 1: he's not going to the hospital. Jesus age.
22:20
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, here is Katie on the Phil Henry Show. Katie,
22:24
Speaker 3: go ahead.
22:26
Speaker 6: You know, I am very concerned about the mentality of you, sir.
22:30
Speaker 6: I have been listening to your program now, I haven't
22:33
Speaker 6: listened to it before.
22:34
Speaker 1: Are you talking about, mister Henry, I'm talking to you.
22:37
Speaker 6: You sit here and tell people that you're driving a
22:40
Speaker 6: high performance car plus Okay, that's.
22:43
Speaker 1: Marvelous, eighty five thousand dollars.
22:45
Speaker 6: Paul, you can't even tell us the name of this
22:48
Speaker 6: child right. Second of all, you cannot even stay his
22:52
Speaker 6: wife us no start, hold on. We have listened to
22:55
Speaker 6: you complaining now for a.
22:56
Speaker 1: Good long time, Harold, I think why did you?
23:00
Speaker 6: Now you have a sister in law that you are
23:02
Speaker 6: wanting to punish, ridicule, and publicly humiliate because she's a
23:07
Speaker 6: single mother trying to raise the sun. You do not
23:10
Speaker 6: know what that woman said to her son.
23:12
Speaker 1: Yeah.
23:13
Speaker 6: Second of all, I am in auto finance, and you
23:15
Speaker 6: telling the entire public that is listening to this that
23:18
Speaker 6: your new car, smell is worth three thousand dollars.
23:21
Speaker 4: Is a bunch of Jaguar.
23:25
Speaker 6: Service from a woman.
23:27
Speaker 5: You do not like, do not care for that's why,
23:34
Speaker 5: that's why mother. Quite frankly, there are a great deal
23:38
Speaker 5: of us who do one hell of a job.
23:40
Speaker 1: Where are you calling from them? Where are you calling
23:42
Speaker 1: from from Utah? Well, there's no single mothers there, that's
23:45
Speaker 1: for sure, But there I am one. You are a
23:48
Speaker 1: single When you say your single mothers, that means you
23:51
Speaker 1: and six other women have the same husband.
23:55
Speaker 5: They're not cheap. I don't have clothing.
23:57
Speaker 1: The Cadillac Escalade is an expensive car, but not anywhere
24:01
Speaker 1: near the price of the Vanda Blood, which is.
24:04
Speaker 6: A listening audience.
24:07
Speaker 5: Is that you are a jerk. You care more for
24:10
Speaker 5: money than.
24:10
Speaker 6: You do people.
24:11
Speaker 5: You do not know a child's name that you would
24:14
Speaker 5: their striken I ask your question, why during dinner did
24:17
Speaker 5: she ask you? Father?
24:18
Speaker 1: Could I ask you about it?
24:19
Speaker 6: Cannot be a father.
24:22
Speaker 1: Ask this boy to have another helpers you know his name,
24:26
Speaker 1: You don't know his name.
24:27
Speaker 4: You don't even know what you want to his mother,
24:30
Speaker 4: who is.
24:31
Speaker 6: Probably working to afport them and doing all that she can.
24:35
Speaker 1: But she can.
24:37
Speaker 6: Her working feet to your restaurants and get free service
24:43
Speaker 6: because you claim new car sails costs three thousand dollars,
24:47
Speaker 6: pay for it. They have a thing called air freshener.
24:52
Speaker 1: You gonna work.
24:54
Speaker 6: You can get it for nine at the local.
24:59
Speaker 1: In East Lost. I have a crown on the.
25:03
Speaker 3: Well. I got to tell you this ched.
25:06
Speaker 2: The lady's made a lot of sense, although I haven't
25:07
Speaker 2: been able to hear her because you've been running.
25:09
Speaker 1: Your big fat mouth, because she's saying things she doesn't
25:12
Speaker 1: know anything about. She's talking about new car air freshener.
25:15
Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? That's a crown on the dash man.
25:18
Speaker 1: If perhaps I was from Guadalajara, If perhaps I was
25:21
Speaker 1: on my way down to the Orange drive in for
25:23
Speaker 1: the flea market on Sunday, maybe I'd consider that I
25:25
Speaker 1: got an eighty five thousand dollar.
25:28
Speaker 4: You are telling.
25:31
Speaker 6: And from the way that you approach people, you first
25:34
Speaker 6: of all, do not care about humankind at all. If
25:37
Speaker 6: you care more about a car, then you do people.
25:40
Speaker 1: And that you will if you're willing to have a
25:42
Speaker 1: green tree from the rear view mirror of your carser,
25:45
Speaker 1: you are.
25:46
Speaker 6: A flea on society. You're the kind of person that
25:49
Speaker 6: thinks somebody owes them something.
25:51
Speaker 5: I don't care how you cut them until you know somebody. Look,
25:55
Speaker 5: you are that sensitive with your car.
25:57
Speaker 6: You shouldn't let anyone in.
25:58
Speaker 3: Thanks for your call, Kenny. She was on hold a
26:01
Speaker 3: long time.
26:01
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I bet yeah. You couldn't wait to get
26:03
Speaker 1: to her, could you.
26:04
Speaker 2: Well, she had a lot of good things to say.
26:05
Speaker 2: She obviously knows the value of automobiles.
26:07
Speaker 1: She doesn't know anything about the three thousand dollars new
26:10
Speaker 1: cais Now. Now, that kid farted in my car, took
26:15
Speaker 1: three gram out of my pocket. You don't even know that, Phil.
26:19
Speaker 1: Do you let people smoke in your car?
26:21
Speaker 3: No? I don't smoke in my own car?
26:23
Speaker 1: All right? Then why am I supposed to let kids
26:25
Speaker 1: fart in? Mind? In other words, people out there don't
26:28
Speaker 1: let people smoke in their car. But when a kid
26:31
Speaker 1: willingly with malice to forethought, and I saw the mother
26:35
Speaker 1: encouraging him for another helping of Brussels scratch fights into
26:40
Speaker 1: my car.
26:41
Speaker 2: You're eighty five thousand dollars Van dan Block, that's right,
26:44
Speaker 2: which now three thousand dollars is off the resale?
26:47
Speaker 1: Wait what am I talking to myself?
26:48
Speaker 2: You were supposed to come on this program and talk
26:51
Speaker 2: about the relative value and the relative excellence of high
26:54
Speaker 2: performance cars. Instead you've been spending forty minutes talking about
26:57
Speaker 2: a little kid farting in it.
27:00
Speaker 1: All right, I tell you what, Phil, I'll call up
27:01
Speaker 1: my sister in law. I'll have her bring her son
27:03
Speaker 1: over to your house. He can sit in your kitchen
27:05
Speaker 1: and let him go all morning, lawn. You go ahead.
27:08
Speaker 1: It wasn't that, it was just any kind of a fart.
27:09
Speaker 1: I don't know what she's feeding this kid. But I
27:11
Speaker 1: almost threw up. This is a segment called I almost
27:18
Speaker 1: threw up.
27:18
Speaker 3: This is a segment.
27:19
Speaker 1: The kid's eyeballs were about to pop out as he
27:22
Speaker 1: squeezed that thing out.
27:23
Speaker 2: This is a segment about cars, and you have been
27:26
Speaker 2: talking NonStop about a kid's farts.
27:30
Speaker 3: Eleanor, you're on the Phil Henry Show. Hi, yes, ma'am.
27:35
Speaker 5: I'd like to address mister Bell in terms of his problem.
27:39
Speaker 6: He's obviously got a psychological problem.
27:41
Speaker 1: Oh, I see, And you're a psychiatrist, are you. Let's see,
27:44
Speaker 1: we just heard from the auto industry.
27:46
Speaker 7: Have never heard such such ridiculous.
27:49
Speaker 4: You're the reason that women choose to.
27:52
Speaker 5: Be single parents.
27:53
Speaker 1: You hate men. Now to Eleanor, finish what I.
27:58
Speaker 5: Would call a man you I have mental dysfunction going on.
28:02
Speaker 1: I'm worth thirty million dollars.
28:04
Speaker 5: That doesn't make you well just because you were, just.
28:07
Speaker 1: Because you went and saw Russell Clue in a beautiful moment.
28:12
Speaker 3: Well, what did you call her?
28:14
Speaker 1: I forget it.
28:15
Speaker 3: I just heard you call her something. What was it?
28:17
Speaker 1: Forget it. I'm not going to repeat it.
28:20
Speaker 4: I didn't hear it.
28:21
Speaker 3: I want to hit the dump button on it. Craig,
28:23
Speaker 3: I wouldn't repeat it, ma'am.
28:25
Speaker 1: Go ahead till her.
28:26
Speaker 3: I'm not going to repeat it.
28:29
Speaker 4: Don't repeat it.
28:30
Speaker 6: It's not worth it.
28:32
Speaker 1: I said, you're mister Bell, you know.
28:36
Speaker 4: Why women choose to be single parents.
28:38
Speaker 1: Yeah, you already said.
28:39
Speaker 5: I think your sister in law should bring charges of
28:43
Speaker 5: assault and battery against you.
28:45
Speaker 1: I spake the boy who has no male figure in
28:48
Speaker 1: his life. He needed it.
28:50
Speaker 5: No, being a male figure doesn't mean you beat.
28:53
Speaker 1: Children, but most women.
28:56
Speaker 5: Sorry for your children. And I'm surprised that you're allowed on.
29:00
Speaker 1: The spankings that called a beating. But you wouldn't know
29:02
Speaker 1: that thanks allowed to Thank you for reed breed.
29:06
Speaker 4: You shouldn't be breeding.
29:10
Speaker 1: Read look at her, the only one between us that's
29:11
Speaker 1: been spitting kids out of you. All right, and that's
29:14
Speaker 1: all right, thank you. You know, uh, mister Henry, you
29:20
Speaker 1: have allowed me to be on your program, to be
29:22
Speaker 1: directly directly victivized by these callers, and that you have
29:27
Speaker 1: you've I heard what you called.
29:28
Speaker 3: That lady by the way, okay, and uh, I understand
29:31
Speaker 3: that we did dump it.
29:32
Speaker 1: Oh you did. Well, let me say it again.
29:33
Speaker 3: I think she's a we dumped it again. I shouldn't
29:39
Speaker 3: we dumped it again.
29:40
Speaker 2: Just forget it, man, you'll never be able to get
29:41
Speaker 2: it out. Linda, you're on the Phil Henry Show. Hello Linda, Hello, Yes,
29:47
Speaker 2: ma'am go ahead.
29:48
Speaker 1: Yes, ma'am.
29:50
Speaker 5: So one.
29:51
Speaker 7: I wanted to ask this man who told him that
29:54
Speaker 7: it was going to be three thousand dollars to resent
29:56
Speaker 7: his car.
29:57
Speaker 1: It's not resenting. When you lose the natural new leather
30:00
Speaker 1: smell of an automobile, it devalues the car, on average
30:04
Speaker 1: by about three thousand dollars. Now, I could certainly go
30:06
Speaker 1: out and get new car smell, air freshener, or hang
30:10
Speaker 1: a little Christmas tree from my rear view mirror. I
30:13
Speaker 1: don't choose to do that. I don't choose to go
30:15
Speaker 1: to drive in movies. I don't choose to go to
30:16
Speaker 1: flea markets. There's things I don't choose to do.
30:19
Speaker 6: So it's not necessary market.
30:21
Speaker 3: That's the second market made.
30:24
Speaker 7: It's not necessarily the new car cent you're trying to replace.
30:27
Speaker 7: It's the sense of the leather that you're trying to replace.
30:30
Speaker 1: Yes, man, that is exactly Gray. Well.
30:32
Speaker 7: That does make a huge difference, because when you're saying
30:34
Speaker 7: new car sent you do understand that that is a
30:37
Speaker 7: sprayed in scent. And it doesn't matter if you have
30:40
Speaker 7: a five thousand dollars car.
30:41
Speaker 1: You're getting your information.
30:43
Speaker 7: I work with car dealerships on a daily basis.
30:46
Speaker 1: The other thing is, wait a minute, are you trying
30:48
Speaker 1: to tell me that they spray that in. I don't
30:49
Speaker 1: think you're doing your industry much good by saying they're
30:52
Speaker 1: spraying that in. Yes, I do.
30:54
Speaker 5: Pop'll know that.
30:55
Speaker 7: And the other thing is than a Jaguar customer, I.
30:59
Speaker 1: Spray their own scent in. That's fine, But having that
31:01
Speaker 1: kid spray his sent in I don't accept. I pay
31:03
Speaker 1: eighty five thousand bucks for them to spray their sent
31:06
Speaker 1: I didn't pay that kid nickel one to spray his
31:08
Speaker 1: sulfur egg part.
31:09
Speaker 5: Okay, well, I understand that that.
31:12
Speaker 7: Have you ever been a Jaguar customer before?
31:15
Speaker 1: Just because you wash cars in the used car lot
31:17
Speaker 1: man doesn't mean you okay. Hey.
31:21
Speaker 2: World famous Phil Henry Show is executive produced by me
31:28
Speaker 3: He let hey, you know you still haven't replaced that
31:32
Speaker 3: new car. Spell have you? Oh God, you'll