Latest / The Breakfast Club / Pretty Private: Bernie Mac's Daugher Je'Niece McCullough Is Keeping Her Father's Legacy Alive Part 1

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Pretty Private: Bernie Mac's Daugher Je'Niece McCullough Is Keeping Her Father's Legacy Alive Part 1 · The Breakfast Club

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebine, a space where no
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: question is off limits and storylines become lifelines. The views
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: shared by our guests are meant to inform, entertain and empower.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: From the laughs to the lessons, Just remember tough times
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: don't last, but professional homegirls do enjoy the show.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: What's up, y'all?
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Ischagara Ebine here and I hope all is cute? Now,
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: Welcome back to another episode a Pretty Private with Ebine,
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  Speaker 3: where storylines become lifelines. In today's episode, I am truly
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  Speaker 3: honored and excited to be sitting down with Janice McCullough,
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  Speaker 3: the doorda of the late great Bernie meg Now. In
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  Speaker 3: part one of our conversation, Janice gives us a real
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: update on them kids that was asking for some milk
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  Speaker 3: and cookies, and she opens up about what it was
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  Speaker 3: like watching her father, the legendary Bernie Mac achieved success
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: later in life. We talk about their humble beginnings, the
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  Speaker 3: grind before the fame, and the moments that shape who
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  Speaker 3: he was long before we all knew his name, and
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  Speaker 3: she also shares when she first noticed that something wasn't
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  Speaker 3: right with her father's health and how those moments changed
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  Speaker 3: everything So y'all, this conversation was so good because not
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  Speaker 3: only does it give us a glimpse into the iconic
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  Speaker 3: Bernie Max's life as an icon, but also as a father,
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  Speaker 3: a husband, and a friend. So get ready because my
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: amazing conversation with Janie starts now. Oh my god, y'all.
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  Speaker 3: So I am super excited to have my guests on
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  Speaker 3: the show. Thank you so much for coming on the show. Deanise,
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: how you doing, how you feeling? Thank you for having me.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: I'm feeling good, good, good, and Happy New Year.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: How'd you know you're treating.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: You New Year's treating me all right? You know, lots
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  Speaker 3: of started off with a bang, big change. Dropped my
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  Speaker 3: daughter off at college, so it's her first semester away,
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: so that was came in with a bank like here
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  Speaker 3: you go, she's an empty nester. Now, y'all, where are
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: you looking forward to? Like, are you gonna try anything new?
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  Speaker 3: Mainly right now, the main thing is I'm looking forward
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  Speaker 3: to just being able to rest, like we just all
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: the ripping and running we were doing trying to get
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  Speaker 3: her situated. Oh my god, and it and I you know,
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  Speaker 3: and I was one of those organized moms that had
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: my list of like, okay, we need to take care
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  Speaker 3: of all of these things. Then we got there and
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  Speaker 3: it was like, oh, we still need some of this stuff,
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: and we were ripping and run and trying to get stuff.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: So for me right now, just to be able to
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: come back and not have to do anything, it's been like, oh,
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  Speaker 3: is this what this feels like?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like you're gonna have a good time.
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  Speaker 2: Though I do too.
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  Speaker 3: I do this is I told her, I said, you know,
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  Speaker 3: I know this is a big change, but I feel
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  Speaker 3: like this is gonna be good for both of us. Yeah,
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  Speaker 3: because she's your only child, right, my only Yes? Oh
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  Speaker 3: so y'all have done in common because you was the
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  Speaker 3: only child too, exactly. Yeah, Okay, well listen, Jenise, I
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: feel like you're gonna have a good time. She's not
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  Speaker 3: open today in y'all's don't be in her DMS. But
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: please don't because I will leave you on Red I
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  Speaker 3: promise you I.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: Will, right right.
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  Speaker 3: Well, I am super grateful to have you on this show.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: I watched a lot of your interviews. I love your podcast,
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: Bernie's Daughter, I watch your dad's interviews, and obviously old
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: movies and stuff. But two of the main reasons why
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: I'm really excited to have this conversation with you is
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: because one, when I was watching your interviews, I felt
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: like I was hearing myself because, like your father, I
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: thought my grandmother was gonna live forever because she was
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  Speaker 3: my superhero. And then two, today is my last day
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: of my fast, so I been trying. Yeah, so I've
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: been trying to, like, you know, reprogram my thoughts around
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: what success looks like. And when I was looking at
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: your dad's old interviews and stuff, one of the things
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: that he always said was just like, you know, study
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: your craft and be confident. And I feel like just
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: hearing those messages kind of played a part in like
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: my reprogramming. So I really appreciate you spend some time
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: with little Meat. Oh, I love it. How long have
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: you been fasting? Okay, so this is my first time
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: fast and so I wanted to take it easy. So
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: I did this fast for three days. So I think
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: next month I'm going to probably do a little bit longer.
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  Speaker 3: But I did receive a lot of clarity, Yes, yeah,
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  Speaker 3: that it'll do that.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, have you fast before?
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  Speaker 3: I sure have? YEA. Actually, the week that my dad died,
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: I was in the middle of a fast. I was
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: in the middle of I think I started out like
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: I said, I was going to do four days, and
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  Speaker 3: then he got hospitalized, so I said, well, I'll just
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: keep it going for the full week, you know, just man,
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  Speaker 3: I did a full seven days.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: See, I wanted to do seven days. I'm like, I
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: gotta pace myself because I know you were smart.
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: You were smart started off with three and then see
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: how you handle that and then go from there. No,
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  Speaker 3: that was smart. Yeah. Now, before we get into it,
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  Speaker 3: I got to ask the number one question, Okay, how
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  Speaker 3: are those kids doing? And I always feel so bad
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  Speaker 3: when I have to tell people there are no little kids,
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  Speaker 3: I know. And you can see the heartbreak on people's
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: faces when they asked me, and I had to tell them, oh,
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  Speaker 3: I'm sorry, that was just a joke.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: And you can see you're a great joke exactly.
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  Speaker 3: And people are like, wait, there's no niece and nephew this,
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: no no, And I'm like, no, baby, it was just
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  Speaker 3: a joke. It's loosely based on real life. My senior
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: year in high school, he took in my mom's niece,
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: my maternal cousin. She was eight and she had a
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: two year old daughter, so he brought them in to
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: live with us, and while that was happening, a good
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  Speaker 3: friend of his took in, i think her niece and
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: nephew because her sister was on drugs. So, you know,
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: as it does when you're dealing with you know, blended families.
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  Speaker 3: And at the time that he did it with us,
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: we were only living in a two bedroom apartment. So
• 6:21
  Speaker 3: he brought like all of us in this two bedroom
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: apartment downtown Chicago like a you know, So between all
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: the shenanigans with us and you know, his friend, he
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  Speaker 3: just more fat into a joke. And that's how that
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  Speaker 3: came about. Listen, well a lot of fact because baby,
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  Speaker 3: I got a TV show off of this. I remember
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  Speaker 3: going to see Kings of Comedy when I was a kid.
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  Speaker 3: I don't know who I was with, with somebody adult,
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  Speaker 3: and I just remember the whole milking cookies joke and
• 6:53
  Speaker 3: like the language he was using to describe the nephew
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  Speaker 3: and stuff. And I'm just like, yo, the fact that
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  Speaker 3: this was not real, it is crazy. He painted a
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: great picture, Like I see why people believed it, but yeah,
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  Speaker 3: he It just to me shows what a great storyteller
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  Speaker 3: he was, and you just brought up something that I
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: always find hilarious. I used to always marvel, like now
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: that kids are like, I love Uncle Bernie, it makes
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: sense he had the TV show. Prior to the TV show,
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: you had no business, you know. I was like wow,
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: because when I was I had like a I have
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: remember some things and I'm like, why was I at
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  Speaker 3: this movie? And who was I with? Because it was
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: so inappropriate. I'm like, yo, black people take kids anywhere else,
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: and there they did it to me. They took me
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  Speaker 3: to see Scarface. I was like four, like why Face?
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  Speaker 3: And I'm sitting there watching al Pacino, you know, shoot up,
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  Speaker 3: snort cocaine and do all kind of skis right.
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  Speaker 2: Right, girl?
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  Speaker 3: So what do you think to sit out the most
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  Speaker 3: about your dad's comedy that people miss the most? Because
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  Speaker 3: I feel like, for me when I watching it, I'm like, damn,
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  Speaker 3: I kind of missed the rawness, like you could just
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: say whatever you want to say and there's no repercussions. Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: I think it's that, And I think I don't know
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  Speaker 3: if my dad had this gift where he made people
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  Speaker 3: feel like they knew him. Yeah, So you know there
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: aren't lots of celebrities that you know, people gravitate towards
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  Speaker 3: for a number of different reasons, but I don't think
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  Speaker 3: there are that many that you feel like that's family. Yeah,
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  Speaker 3: and there's something about my dad that people feel like
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  Speaker 3: they are literally watching their uncle or their dad or
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  Speaker 3: you know, their cousin. And I really think that's a
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  Speaker 3: big part of it, as well as, like what you said,
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  Speaker 3: his his no nonsense filter. There's not too many comedians
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  Speaker 3: that could talk about busting the kid's head to the
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  Speaker 3: white wee and people crack up laughing at it like
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  Speaker 3: that is they were calling the people exactly.
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  Speaker 2: So do you feel like his jokes would land now
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  Speaker 2: in today's climate?
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  Speaker 3: Yes, saying no, I feel like and he got a
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: little taste of it right before he died. When Barack
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: Obama was running for president. They had a fundraiser in Chicago,
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  Speaker 3: and my dad performed at the fundraiser and this was
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: like really one of his tamer sex.
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  Speaker 2: Because he imagine.
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  Speaker 3: Contrary to what people like to think, he had since
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: he wasn't just gonna go anywhere and say something anything,
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: but he did a bit because my mom was going
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: through menopause at that time, and he did a bit
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: about her going through menopause, and it really was only
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: like one or two people at the event that just
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: didn't like the joke and yelled out, you're sexist. That's
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: such a misogynistic Texas joke. And he was like, dude,
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: it's a joke. If he don't like it, just don't laugh.
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: And the next day it got blown up into epic proportions.
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: It was on the front page of the paper like
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: Bernnie Maxis bunch of goes on the sexist tirade and
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: Barack Obama's you know, fundraising event, and it was on
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: the news and entertainment tonight and everywhere. So he'd gotten
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: a little taste of it before he died of the
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: backlash that could happen. And I feel like that's what
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: it would be today. I feel like the vast majority
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: of people would still be laughing at him, but it'd
• 10:19
  Speaker 3: be that small subset of people that are like, you can't,
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: how dare you say that? No? Right? You know, and
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: especially now with social media being what it is, because
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: that in two thousand and eight it wasn't quite what
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: it is now. So yeah, I think it'd be that.
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: Wait, Janis the people who yelled out, were they white?
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: You already know, you.
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: Know because you know it wasn't us.
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: I know.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love asking to raised question when I'm talking
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: to certain people, because you are you know the answer,
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  Speaker 3: because you know that man ain't sexist? Shut up his
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: white sitting right there, she probably cracking up with Michelle
• 11:02
  Speaker 3: and I do, yes, I do, right, Okay, So what.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: Was young Jeni's like growing up in Chicago?
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: So I tell people this all the time because people
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: think Vanessa from the TV show is after me. I
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: was Jordan's. Yeah, young Jennie's was. I wasn't shy And
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: there are some family members who think I was shy,
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: And it wasn't that I was shy. I was scared
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: of my dad. He made everything a big deal. Like
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: the way he talked to Jordan's that's how he used
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: to talk to me. It's all you gotta string up.
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: We're gonna spend each other and spit and be looking
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: at him like wait what Like that episode where he's
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: trying to toughen Jordan up and he's trying to teach
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: him how to play the dozens, and he's like, you
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: gotta talk about his mama tell him right, telling your
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: mama so fat, I put up tablespo on water and
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: she got it and it overflow. And Jordan is like, now,
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: Uncle Bernie, that's so mean. What if I like his mama?
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: That's me. That was young Jennie's. Young Janie's was just like,
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: I just love everybody, and everybody should love each other,
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: and if we just love each other, all the world's
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: problems will be solved.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: And he eyes looking at you.
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: He was like, man, if you don't tough enough. And
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: I've told this story before on the pocket and got
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: a whole lot of backlash about it. I don't know why,
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: but I remember I was nine and I used to
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: have to ride the bus because I got bullied. I
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: got bullied from kindergarten all the way up all the
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: way through sixth grade. Oh wow, yeah, and then we
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: would uh after first grade, we moved out of my
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: school district. But because we moved so much, my dad
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: didn't want me to have to change schools, so they
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: hired a private bus company to take me to him
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: from school. So I would get bullied on the bus
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: on the way to and from school and get bullied
• 12:44
  Speaker 3: at school. Wow. One particular day, one of the boys
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: on the bus punched me in my eye.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: He punched you in your eye.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: Like we did in mine. By the time I got
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: to school, I had a black eye and I remember, wait.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: Wait, did you punch back?
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: Now, Denise was and it wasn't because I didn't know
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: how to fight. I didn't like fighting, like the energy
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: behind fighting. Even with my cousins. When we would get
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: into fight, you I was the tight. You had to
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: really really push you to that point and then I
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: would explode and then everybody's like, whoa, I didn't know she.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: This whole murder scene.
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that was me. And to your point about it,
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: I was punch him back. By the time I get home,
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: you know, my bus driver, Refen Cherry, has to go
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: let my dad know. Hey, we had an incident this
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: morning on the bus. So my dad is pissed, and
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: I remember he cussed that little boy out. So he
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: was like, you little fat fuck, don't you ever touch
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: my door? And I'm behind my dad like yeah, yeah.
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: So we get back in the house and he's like, now,
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: what'd you do when that little fat motherfucker punched you.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: I'm thinking it's a trick question. I'm like I cried,
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: it hurt like the man. When I say he was,
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: he was like ooh. He started punching the wall.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: He was like, what the is roller?
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: And he looked at me. He said, tomorrow, you better
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: get on that bus. He said, you better whoop that
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: little stap motherfucker's ass because if you don't, I'm gonna
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: whoop your ass. So now I'm like, oh shoot, because,
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: like I said again, it wasn't that I couldn't fight.
• 14:24
  Speaker 3: I just didn't like it. I didn't and I'm like,
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: but why can't you You already did it. He was like, man,
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: you better do it. So I remember I got on
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: the bus and it was one of the older kids.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: We used to call her yummy. I don't I don't
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: know why. I mean, I don't know why we were
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: calling this little girl.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: The end of the day.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: We used to get away, right because a kid.
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: It's crazy for.
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: A grammar school kid. Yeah, And I remember I was like,
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: could you beat him up for me? And I just
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: go home and tell my dad I beat him up.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: And I remember clear as day, she said, normally I
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: would I love to be able to beat him up,
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: but he ain't did nothing to me. Today, so I
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: can't beat him up today. You're gonna have to do it,
• 15:05
  Speaker 3: she said, But I'll keep watch for you so you
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: don't get in trouble. Now you go back there, he
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: will sleep on the back in the very back of
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: the van. He was sleep. She was like, just go
• 15:16
  Speaker 3: punch him in his back and just start beating him up.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: You can do it, And I'm looking out to yummy, Yeah, yummy.
• 15:23
  Speaker 3: She had my back, she really did, and I'm like no,
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: and we're getting closer and closer to her stop, and
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: she was like, look, you better hurry up and do
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: it because I'm gonna be able to help you once.
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: I waited until we like rounded the corner of her block.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: And then finally, cause I'm it's like I'm taking the
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: green mile, like I'm doing the green mile of the
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: long walk to the back, like right, I'm looking at
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: her like yummy, like go go get right. She got this,
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: and I'm like she like right. I'm just like oh no.
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: So finally I get the nerve or two and I
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: punched him dead in his back and he wakes up
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: out of his sleep crying, and I just started letting
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: him have it. And she's like ass he's crying. Reverend
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: Cherry had to stop the bus like, oh.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: Lord, what is going on these deal kids?
• 16:20
  Speaker 3: And honestly, that unleashed something. From that moment on, I
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: started acting rowdy on the bus because that was the
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: only time I didn't get bothered. Yeah, And I remember
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: Reverend Cherry. I remember it was one one day. We
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: must have clowned so bad. He stopped in the middle
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: of the street and was like, dawg gorny you kids,
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: And I'll never forget. He looked at me and said,
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: in Genie, you used to be the good one. And
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: I felt bad because, like I said, that really wasn't me.
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: And I remember I was the last stop on the
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: bus going home, and right when he got to my
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: house that day, I said, Reverend Cherry, I'm sorry for
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: being bad to but I'm gonna let you know I'm
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: gonna do it again tomorrow because that's the only time
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: that they don't mess with me. So as long as
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: the other kids are on the bus, I'm gonna be bad.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: I gotta say enough for myself.
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: Right when when they're gone and it's just us, I'll
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: be myself. But that's how it was. It went at
• 17:17
  Speaker 3: your dad say so I girl. I was so proud
• 17:20
  Speaker 3: to go home and tell him I would beat him up.
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: I was so proud. I was like, damn it, I
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: did it. I did it, and he was proud. He
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: was like, yeah, what you do me? And I was like, oh,
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: and I did it like this, and I punched him
• 17:31
  Speaker 3: and he was crying and I kept punching them. I
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: really did. Like he was so proud, like and I
• 17:36
  Speaker 3: just felt so proud, like, yes, I made my dad proud. Gay.
• 17:40
  Speaker 3: Oh that's such an important lesson though, because I think
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: about when I was growing up and my mom used
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: to always be like, you better not come home with
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: those scratches on your face, like you better fight back.
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: But it also taught me how to be tough and
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: also just stand up for myself. Yes, yeah, that's the thing.
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: Like I completely understand the energy behind what my dad
• 17:58
  Speaker 3: was trying to teach me. I just wish he'd gone
• 18:00
  Speaker 3: about it a different way where he didn't have me
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: terrified of him, because I'm like, you could have taught
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: me self defense skills without like scaring putting the feeling
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: in me right right you, I'm terrified now because I'm like,
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: what this? Yeah, so, but I completely get it. I
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: really do. Yeah. One thing I love about your family
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: story is the bond between your mom and dad, Like
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: I think it is such a beautiful love story. Like
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: what do you think about them made them like made
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: it so special? Honestly, I just feel like I feel
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: like they were two sides of the same coin. Honestly, Yeah,
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: I really do. When I look at my parents, because
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: they were so young when they had young got together,
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: I really and they had some of the same issues,
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: Like my dad didn't know his biological father. My mom
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: really didn't know hers, my biological maternal grandfather. My grandmother
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: divorced him when my mom was five, and she was
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: one of those men, you know, as long as he
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: was married to my grandmother, he was an involved dad.
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: And you know, my mom was a daddy's girl. As
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: soon as my grandmother divorced, and he was like, well,
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: f you and f them kids and that. So they
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: had that thing in common that I think that they
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: could relate to each other with. And I just think
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: they they weathered the storm together like they because I'm
• 19:32
  Speaker 3: not gonna sit here and try to pretend like it was.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: I don't know if you can see behind a veil.
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: Y'all might have looked at my parents like right, but
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: I think that they both had a commitment to seeing
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: their relationship and their marriage through what's up y'all. It's
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: your girl ebn A here and be sure to follow
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: me on Instagram and too, talk at pretty private podcasts,
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: and don't forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel at
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: the Professional Homegirl. Now let's get back to the show.
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: I mean, I can only imagine from nineteen to up
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: to his passing, Like I can.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Only imagine the storms that they endure.
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, absolutely.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: Especially with him being on the road and stuff.
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And it's and one of the things that I
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: don't think people realize is his dream of becoming a
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: comedian wasn't a joint dream. That wasn't something that's an
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: impart share together. That was his dream. Like that's one
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: of the things My mom even told me that that
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: he like the first I don't know if we can
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: call it as a date because they had a half
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: day at school and her friend was going with his friends,
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: so that's kind of how they wound up getting together.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: But she said on the bus ride to Whoever's house,
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: they were going to He told her, girl, you better
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: get on this train or get left.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: To me.
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: He said, I'm gonna be fair, I'm gonna be rich,
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: i'm gonna be famous, I'm gonna be a comedian. You
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: better get on this train and get left. It's always
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: been his dream, So it wasn't like that. It was
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: you know, Oh, this was something they brainstorm together. It
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: was his. So my mom held it down for him
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: to go live his dream, you know, at the expense
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: of some of her own.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: You think she regrets that.
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: I don't know if it's so much regret as it is.
• 21:34
  Speaker 3: I think she's acutely aware of what she gave up. Yeah,
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: I believe she's acutely aware of that. I don't know
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: if it's regret because I mean, it did all work
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: out in everybody's favor, So I don't know if it's
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: so much regret, but I do believe that she is
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: absolutely aware. Yeah, hey, I sacrifice all of this, you know,
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: for to help him, which I mean, it's true, there's
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: a lot, and I'm not I'm well aware that everything
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: my mom did she would have done regardless of if
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: he chose his profession or not. He could have you know,
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: been a regular Joe working at a bank or whatever,
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: and she still would have been doing the same thing
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: she did. But I also can't take away from the
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: fact that her doing what she did made it much
• 22:23
  Speaker 3: easier for him go on the road, you know, and.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Then I'm here with this baby for right.
• 22:29
  Speaker 3: You can be on the road and do what you
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: do on the road without worrying about how your kid
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: is being taken care of. Yeah, you can do that freely.
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: So yeah, so what do you remember most about those
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: grind years? Because you know your dad was building, but
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: he wasn't really yet, like Burnie Mack to all of us.
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: And I feel like when I watched those years, because
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: he actually he didn't really get that much commercial success
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: into it as he got older. It was much later
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: by the time. That's one of the that I tell
• 23:00
  Speaker 3: people all the time, especially like when I get lumped
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: into the oh, you're a NEPO baby, I'm like, am
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: I though? Right, I'm wrong? I was. But yeah, like
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: by the time the fame came, I was in college.
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: You know, there was some there was some stuff happening
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: while I was in high school, but the bulk of it,
• 23:20
  Speaker 3: like the height of his fame I was wrong when
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: that happened. I just I remember the struggle, like, I
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: absolutely remember the struggle because when my parents first got married,
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: you know, for some kids in nineteen seventy seven, they
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: were doing all right because my great grandfather got my job,
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: my dad a job at General Motors, and then he
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: still had some of the insurance money from my paternal
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: grandmother's death. So nineteen seventy seven to nineteen year old kids,
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: you know, get there, right, yeah, they're like, oh right,
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: we got at a park, we got a car, we
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: were doing it fancy exactly, and then right before I
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: entered kindergarten, he got laid off. And that's when it
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: was like, what happened? What is this? Like I remember
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: the car got repossessed, but you know, I'm I'm five,
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I just know we come out and
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: the car is gone, and I'm like, somebody stole our car, right,
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: stole our car. And they're just like, yeah, right, dog
• 24:30
  Speaker 3: one shame and we were carless for you know years
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: after that. I'm like, can you believe we had a
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: car and somebody stole it? We had a car since like,
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: and we just we struggled. We lost the apartment. That's
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: when we had to, you know, live with my maternal grandparents, no,
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: I mean my paternal great grandparents for a while, and
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: that's when we started we moved a lot. Like I
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: remember being that kid that I used to feel so
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: bad because all my friends had one house, you know.
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: And that's when we had a little phone book. She
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: wrote everybody's name and the number down in your little
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: phone book, and I would always have to come to
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: my friends like, that's not my address and phone number anymore, y'all.
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: This is my new address and phone number. And it
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: went that way for pretty much the rest of them
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: my childhood, and I just remember.
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: One.
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: There are two pivotal moments that I remember that made
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: me feel like money is I knew the gravity of
• 25:29
  Speaker 3: what not having money held. One is my mom. We
• 25:33
  Speaker 3: were at my maternal grandmother's house and my mom was
• 25:36
  Speaker 3: with her mom and sisters, and she was really upset
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: because we didn't have any money, and I remember she
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: broke down crying, like I mean, just full on. She's like, God,
• 25:47
  Speaker 3: I don't know what did I do, Like why are
• 25:50
  Speaker 3: we going through this? Why is this our life? And
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: I remember just seeing my mom crying and one of
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: my aunts was like, oh, baby, don't worry. Your mom
• 25:56
  Speaker 3: just having a nervous break now real quick. She'd be
• 25:58
  Speaker 3: all right, we.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: Just broke right now, baby, Like.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: That's that's it.
• 26:03
  Speaker 4: And I and quiet has kept like my mom's you know,
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: family wasn't really necessarily more supportive of my dad trying
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: to be like I tell people.
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: You can tell people today you want to be a comedian, Yes, exactly.
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: Back then you tell somebody you want to be a
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: comedian and folks are looking at you like if you
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: don't get you.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: And that's why his story hits different.
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, you know it's completely different. Back then. Sure
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: there were comedians, but that was some far off stuff
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: like that was if you don't get your black ass
• 26:38
  Speaker 3: up and go get a job, right, So yeah, it
• 26:42
  Speaker 3: was that. And then the second moment, I remember, we
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: had gotten an apartment on eighty second in Peoria, which
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: is on the south side of Chicago, and they, I
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: guess they did some like Renaiscenter type stuff to get
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: the furniture and a throwback. Yeah, and my dad at
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: that time he was working at Docs, which was a
• 27:04
  Speaker 3: fast food restaurant sold fish and stuff, and he was
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: the manager of the restaurant and my mom was a nurse.
• 27:14
  Speaker 3: They were so far behind that there was a garnishment
• 27:18
  Speaker 3: order put in. It went to my dad first because
• 27:21
  Speaker 3: he was the main, you know, loan and my mom
• 27:26
  Speaker 3: was just the co signer. But because he was the manager,
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: he threw it away. So okay, right, so they can't
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: get his paycheck. They get my mama's paycheck. So she
• 27:36
  Speaker 3: comes home, do you my check get And I hear
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: them going back and forth arguing, so I'm like, I
• 27:45
  Speaker 3: don't know, I'm like nine, I'm like eight or nine.
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: I'm like this garnish man. So I go, you know,
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: and this is before the age of Google kids. We
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: could not Google. I had to tag, you know, Encyclopedia
• 27:55
  Speaker 3: Britannica set with the dictionary. I was like, let me
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: look up a garnishment and I'm like, oh, well, that's
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: what that means. So that's like I knew. Those were
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: the two moments that I remember, like understanding that money
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: is a big we got a problem with money. We
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: ain't got mine, Yeah, a big problem. And these are
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: these are issues. And my dad was the type he
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: didn't and I've inherited this from him, so I understand
• 28:25
  Speaker 3: it now on this level so much more than I
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: did as a kid. He carried a lot of stuff
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: internally and didn't let you see it. So if you
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: looked at him, you operated under the guys of oh
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: he's fine, okay, yeah, or he doesn't he's not taking
• 28:42
  Speaker 3: this that serious.
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: Like.
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: And I remember they were arguing and my mom was like,
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: what are we gonna do? Like bnar, we gotta pay this,
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: And I remember him just calmly saying, Ronda, we ain't
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: got it. So what you want us to do ain't
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: nothing we can do, right, And that's really what And
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: that's what he said. He said, there's nothing we can't do,
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: and that's pretty much where he was. And he never
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: he never wavered from I know, this is what it
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: looks like right now, but it's going to be this,
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: you know. And my mom I always tell people my
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: dad was the dreamer. My mom is the realist. My
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: mom was like, Negro, I ain't got time to hear
• 29:18
  Speaker 3: about what well we're gonna be and here and now
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: we are not.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: I know she was stressed with him.
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: Man, oh absolute, you know, and again it's and this
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: is this is the only reason why I keep saying
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: to people like, keep in mind, this is not a
• 29:33
  Speaker 3: shared dream, This is not a yes, this is you, Like,
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: I'm sacrificing all of this while you go out there playing,
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: telling jokes and crack right, bruh, what are you doing? Like,
• 29:47
  Speaker 3: I get it, you know, I understand, like I said,
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: now that I'm grown, I fully get it. Yeah, And
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: so because she was at home raising me to her,
• 29:59
  Speaker 3: it looks like you out there having fun. Right. No
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: matter how much he's explained you hear all the time
• 30:06
  Speaker 3: from comedians, being on the road is not glamorous, even
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: being in the comedy clubs, you know, honing your crab,
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: it's not glamorous. But to the people who are there,
• 30:15
  Speaker 3: you know, on the sidelines, they can't see. All she
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: know is you came home from work, you ate, you showered,
• 30:22
  Speaker 3: you left about nine o'clock, you ain't come back till two, three,
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: four in the morning. You look like you've been having
• 30:28
  Speaker 3: a grand old time, right, But like and he's like, no,
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: that's not what it is. So there was a lot
• 30:35
  Speaker 3: of friction there because you know they're not on the
• 30:38
  Speaker 3: same page. And if you've watched interviews with my mom,
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: you have heard her say well, I just finally said no,
• 30:45
  Speaker 3: you go ahead and do it, because if he didn't
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: make it, I didn't want him looking at me and saying, yeah,
• 30:51
  Speaker 3: she has said that. So it was those early years
• 30:57
  Speaker 3: were yeah. And now it makes sense because I did
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: see a clip where I think he won like three
• 31:03
  Speaker 3: thousand dollars.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: And your mom was going in baby Jesus, the way she.
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: Was shouting it was number one. He won first place
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: yea of the contents. And that was, like I said,
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: when when I tell you, my dad to me is
• 31:19
  Speaker 3: like the king of speaking life over himself. There's never
• 31:23
  Speaker 3: been a time that I can remember that he wasn't
• 31:26
  Speaker 3: like I'm gonna this is what's gonna happen, Like it's
• 31:29
  Speaker 3: there was never a a it's not gonna happen. If
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: he had a thought that it might not happen, he
• 31:34
  Speaker 3: kept that to himself.
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he never it always sure.
• 31:38
  Speaker 3: He was always like this is what I'm gonna do.
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna be so. And I remember, like they're you know,
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: going through who you know, they they say third place
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: and I remember they ain't that's the third place. And
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: then they go run her up and it's like, we
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: ain't got no choice but to be him, and they
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: said first place burning Mack and we but and my
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: mom is just she was screaming, see my damnstage, like
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: calm down, girl, okay, and be like that's my wife
• 32:15
  Speaker 3: and she is still Yeah, but I feel like she
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: needed that though, like that was a win for her
• 32:20
  Speaker 3: as well. Yeah. Yeah, And I remember like when we
• 32:24
  Speaker 3: were backstage taking pictures with the check, I remember thinking, wow,
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: three thousand, we're rich now years girl, but you listen,
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: three thousand dollars was a lot of money. Yes, like
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: back then, you know, we still went back to our
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: We went in a two bedroom apartment by then. But yeah,
• 32:45
  Speaker 3: it's come on. Yeah. But the funny thing is, and
• 32:49
  Speaker 3: this is what I tell people all the time, in
• 32:51
  Speaker 3: his career, there were always these I call him Stairstep
• 32:54
  Speaker 3: moments because something would happen and it was like, this
• 32:57
  Speaker 3: is the biggest, greatest thing that's ever happened. And it
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: wasn't like it was an overnight change. So that was
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: nineteen ninety. Nothing really changed just yet, like we still,
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: you know, we're in our apartment and we actually got
• 33:12
  Speaker 3: evicted out of that apartment and found out in a
• 33:16
  Speaker 3: one bedroom on one hundred first, Keen like, yeah, it
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: didn't change right away. So then you know that leads
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: to now Russell Simmons and Bob Sumner are showcasing for
• 33:27
  Speaker 3: this new show called Deaf Comedy Jam that's going to
• 33:29
  Speaker 3: be coming on and they you know, he passes through
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: the auditions for that, he gets on death Jam. He
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: does the first season, does pretty good, does well enough
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: that they bring him back for the second season, and
• 33:42
  Speaker 3: that's the let me scatter you mother, that's that right,
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: and that's like, but what people didn't understand back then,
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: Death Jam didn't pay, so that was that we're still
• 33:54
  Speaker 3: in our our one bedroom apartment yeah of Chicago, Like
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: we're still there at that So that's that. But then
• 34:04
  Speaker 3: def Jam makes Martin's career blow up. So Martin and
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: dev Jam gets so big. Not only are they now
• 34:12
  Speaker 3: doing the TV show, they're doing a tour. So with
• 34:15
  Speaker 3: Martin leaving the show and going somewhere else, they're like, well,
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: we need a host for the tour. So they asked
• 34:21
  Speaker 3: my dad, Hey, why don't you host the tour? So
• 34:23
  Speaker 3: he starts hosting the dev Jam Yes, okay, So that's
• 34:30
  Speaker 3: when it started, like the momentum started to build and
• 34:34
  Speaker 3: That's when it was. You know, up until that point
• 34:37
  Speaker 3: when he was gone, he was gone locally in the city,
• 34:41
  Speaker 3: you know, just at nightclubs and you know, maybe a
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: show out of town here or there. The dev Jam
• 34:48
  Speaker 3: tour was when it was like, no, he's gone, and
• 34:51
  Speaker 3: that was get a new normal that I don't think
• 34:54
  Speaker 3: any of us were prepared for because what wound up
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: happening is well, now me and my mom are in
• 34:59
  Speaker 3: a groove because you're gone, like four four days, four
• 35:03
  Speaker 3: or five days. Mem I, right, did you come? You
• 35:07
  Speaker 3: come back? And right in order? Sory like like you're
• 35:12
  Speaker 3: on nowhere right, and he's upset like this, my I'm
• 35:16
  Speaker 3: on the road working for.
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: And this is how I get you miss me.
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: And it's not that we didn't miss him, but it's like,
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: this is your own routine exactly. And I don't think
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: people realize, like you can have a dream, but it's
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: gonna cost you something. Yeah, And I get a lot
• 35:36
  Speaker 3: people are like, thank you so much for sharing your dead,
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: thank you so much for sacrificing. And I'm like, you
• 35:40
  Speaker 3: can't tell me that I'm the kid. You can tell
• 35:42
  Speaker 3: Ronda that because there are things Ronda willingly sacrificed as
• 35:46
  Speaker 3: his spouse. But I'm like, but I was the kid.
• 35:48
  Speaker 3: I was the sacrifice. Yeah, sacrifice time, you know, and
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: I understand why. I completely understand why and get the
• 35:55
  Speaker 3: reason behind it. But yeah, there's a sacrifice on that
• 35:59
  Speaker 3: to where by the time he does get it, where
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: he's you know, oh, we ain't got to worry about
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: money no more. I can sit down and I can
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: do this. I'm grown and getting married. And he looking
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: at me like, what the hell you mean? You get right?
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: You just ate yesterday.
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: So much time has passed, yes.
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: And so you bumped heads a lot during that time because,
• 36:25
  Speaker 3: like I said, I understand it today from his perspective,
• 36:28
  Speaker 3: but back then I was like, dude, what are you
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: going through? But that's that was him. He I'm missing
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: so much, and by the time I get home, I'm like, hey,
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: what's happening? And life is passing me by on this front.
• 36:39
  Speaker 3: And then for him, it feels like like I said,
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: for him, it felt like it was thankless because a
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: lot of times he would say, y'all don't understand what
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: I go through. Y'all don't understand, and we're looking at
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: him like, well, sir, nobody told you the one that
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: told us you was gonna famous. Right, we did tell
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: you go out there and do this, you know, and
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: everything I'm doing i'm doing for you all.
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: White, but it's a little bit for you as well, right, like.
• 37:06
  Speaker 3: Don't try to act like this same you, you know.
• 37:09
  Speaker 3: So yeah, it was a lot of It was a
• 37:12
  Speaker 3: lot of that. I'm just curious, like, while you're watching
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: him build his career and you see what it took
• 37:23
  Speaker 3: for him to get to a certain point at a
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: later age, how did that shape how you define success
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: for your own career Because I know you worked in nonprofit.
• 37:30
  Speaker 3: I know you was his assistant, and if I'm not mistaken,
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: he was also a therapist, right, are you still our therapist? Well?
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: I never got licensed, okay, so yeah. But for me,
• 37:41
  Speaker 3: I never had grand visions like my dad. Success to
• 37:47
  Speaker 3: me wasn't being seen and known and doing that. To me,
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: success was always just about finding something that I loved
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: doing and doing that and hopefully making a decent living
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: at it. Like it it. Really. I never was that person.
• 38:02
  Speaker 3: I was great a school. I was the student that
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: everybody was like, oh, yeah, she's gonna be somebody. But
• 38:06
  Speaker 3: I never was like, yes, all right. That was never
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: my thing, Like for me it was. I was always
• 38:13
  Speaker 3: more like I just want to be loved, Like, let's
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: let's live a Barnie life.
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: I love you, you know, I interview him.
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna see you the link because Barnie was black,
• 38:24
  Speaker 3: I know. Yeah, shout out today. Yeah, yes, Like that
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: was always my vision of success. Can we have harmony
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: in our relationships and stuff? So for me watching my dad.
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: That was good.
• 38:38
  Speaker 3: Can we have harmony? Yeah? Yeah, because I didn't see
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: I didn't see a lot of that. What I saw
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: growing up were a lot of adults who I'm sure
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: loved each other, but the harmony was always off. Like
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: even within my parents' marriage, the harmony was always off.
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: You got two people who have two different visions of
• 38:58
  Speaker 3: what life is, and somebody's sacrificing, then somebody's like man
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: and this person, and it just can we all can
• 39:06
  Speaker 3: we come together? Like we all want the same thing, right,
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: I want to love you, you want to love me. Let's
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: do So that was always my thing. But for me
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: watching my dad it did give me the sense that
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: nothing's impossible, like watching having a front row seat to
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: watching my dad go from people going look at this
• 39:27
  Speaker 3: black dude he talking about he funny, okay to where
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: people are like, oh my god, he's the Oh you're
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: to seeing that happen to watching him even just I
• 39:40
  Speaker 3: used to watch with baited breath when he would get
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: on stage because that was a thing I didn't have.
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: My dad had the confidence in his career. He wished
• 39:49
  Speaker 3: you would tell him he wasn't funny. I don't say
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: it there. I dare you to tay once we get
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: on this stage and make your butt laugh off for
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: forty minutes, forty five minutes, and I watch me do it,
• 39:59
  Speaker 3: and so oh when I remember, like whenever they would call,
• 40:02
  Speaker 3: you know, ladies and gentlemen come to the stage, right
• 40:03
  Speaker 3: you mad and he get on stage, I'd be watching
• 40:05
  Speaker 3: the audience like, oh okay, because I'm scared and because
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: I can only think I don't have the guts to
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: try to get on laugh. You know, even now when
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: people are like, oh, you should do comedy new No,
• 40:19
  Speaker 3: I should not.
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: You are mad funny though, because I was watching your
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: videos and stuff.
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: But okay, I'm gonna say this, And this is the
• 40:26
  Speaker 3: thing my dad used to tell people all the time
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: when they would go man I'm funny. How do I
• 40:30
  Speaker 3: become a comedian? There's a huge difference between me sitting
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: around and saying something that makes you laugh. You know,
• 40:37
  Speaker 3: we're in a conversation, we're having to say or do something,
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: versus me getting on a stage. Yeah, and now the
• 40:44
  Speaker 3: only goal, My only objective is to make you laugh.
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: There's an art form to comedy. I don't have that.
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: And then I'm too cerebral and analytical. If a joke
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: doesn't land, I don't know how to move on and
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: I'm anna stop mid routine. Okay, So I see that
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: didn't work for y'all. Could you tell me why? Right?
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: Like so right in my head, I thought it was
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: gonna be little? So what didn't land for you? Right now?
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: Hold on?
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: Let me give my notes?
• 41:11
  Speaker 4: Oul?
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: What didn't? And y'all would be like, man, what are
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: you doing faking us? Laugh? I ain't here for your surveys?
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: Like the girl boot me so hard? Like yeah, and
• 41:23
  Speaker 3: I still I'd be like, okay, I see y'all boring?
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: Now what made y'all want to boo me? Right? Next? Right?
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: I don't have the gift to get on stage and
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: do that. I can, you know, talk and do speaking
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: and hosting and just happen to say something funny enough
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: to carry it through. But mm hmmm, five ten, fifteen
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: minutes of I'm none, I'm supposed to tell the story
• 41:44
  Speaker 3: and make you laugh.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, m m facts fag.
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: So at what point did you begin to sense that
• 41:51
  Speaker 3: something was going on with your father's health? Oh? I
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: always knew. So he got diagnosed with sarchadosis when I
• 41:58
  Speaker 3: was like six. I think it was about six years
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: old when he was diagnosed with sorry coodosis. And unfortunately
• 42:08
  Speaker 3: it back then, I mean kind of same as now.
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: If you talk to people who have been diagnosed, they
• 42:13
  Speaker 3: don't know a whole lot about it. So his doctor
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: basically was like, well, this is pretty much your only symptom,
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: which was he was like shorter breath, more short of
• 42:21
  Speaker 3: breath when he was you know, playing basketball or boxing
• 42:23
  Speaker 3: or whatever. They were like, just go ahead and live
• 42:26
  Speaker 3: your life then, and so that was that. So that
• 42:29
  Speaker 3: was eighty six, and then I want to say, like
• 42:31
  Speaker 3: eighty nine, eighty nine or ninety I think it was
• 42:33
  Speaker 3: eighty nine he got diagnosed with hypertension, and then ninety
• 42:39
  Speaker 3: nine got diagnosed with diabetes. So I've always actually when
• 42:44
  Speaker 3: he got diagnosed with diabetes. That was the like whoa,
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: because I was in college by then, and I remember
• 42:52
  Speaker 3: my dad was a chainsmoker up until like ninety six breath.
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: Oh girl, yeah, first it was cooling, my cool miles.
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: Then he went to the brands, Then he went to Salem's,
• 43:06
  Speaker 3: then went to Newport Newports. Baby, yeah, that was he
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: was a chainsmoker. And what happened while he stopped? And
• 43:15
  Speaker 3: we used to get on him for years about quitting,
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: and he would lie and say he quit, and we'd
• 43:20
  Speaker 3: find the cigarettes, you know. And my freshman year in college,
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: my mom lost like eighty six eighty seven pounds and
• 43:29
  Speaker 3: he came home one day and looked and he quit
• 43:33
  Speaker 3: cold turkey. He said, hell no, he said, all right,
• 43:37
  Speaker 3: I ain't about to kill over and die. You move
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: another man in my house, spend all my money on
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: the head, and he quit smoking like just like that.
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: And for me, like my mom kind of I got
• 43:50
  Speaker 3: a credit my mom with this. She like made us
• 43:52
  Speaker 3: pay attention to sorry health. More so, when she lost
• 43:55
  Speaker 3: all that weight, she joined like a kickboxing class. She
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: had started exercising.
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: Oh she was active.
• 43:59
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, So my sophomore year, I brought my roommate
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: home for Thanksgiving and my mom was like, once your girls,
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: come with me to my Steper Ruby's class. And we're like,
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: I mean, all right, I guess we got nothing to do.
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: So we put on our little bike and shorts broad top, like,
• 44:17
  Speaker 3: all right, let's go ahead. Five minutes into the class,
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: we're in the back in the corner, and I remember
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: clear as day, the instructor goes for all advanced moves,
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: watch Ronda, and my mom is gone, man, talk about
• 44:42
  Speaker 3: stay hold on. My mom about to be forty, and
• 44:45
  Speaker 3: she just ran circles around me. I said, absolutely not
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: not gonna be me. So I went back to school
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: and I was like, I need to join the gym,
• 44:55
  Speaker 3: but you know, they had me as broke college students,
• 44:57
  Speaker 3: so I couldn't afford the gym. So then I was like, well,
• 44:59
  Speaker 3: what's the why? Looking like I couldn't afford the why?
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: So I was like, what's Walmart? Looking like? I went
• 45:04
  Speaker 3: about a bunch of videotapes, a bunch of exercise tapes,
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: and I would work out. I would go to class
• 45:10
  Speaker 3: and come back to my room and work out in class.
• 45:12
  Speaker 3: And I did that from ninety six up until like
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: and since then I've always stayed active. So during that time,
• 45:22
  Speaker 3: I remember like I started seeing results and I got
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: vain and was like, ooh, I want arms like Angela Bassets.
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: So I'm really about to stop.
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: Definitely some arms.
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah. I was like, yeah, I was on a
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: mission to get my arms like Angela Bassett. So that's
• 45:35
  Speaker 3: ninety nine. My dad got diagnosed with diabetes, and after
• 45:38
  Speaker 3: that that's when I was like, Okay, yeah, I really
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: want arms like Angela Bassett. But my dad got sary
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: kradsis hypertension diabetes and hypertension and diabetes runs in our family,
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: and for some reason, the paternal genes seemed real strong
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: in me. So I'm gonna have to do this less
• 45:59
  Speaker 3: for vanity and more to keep my health up because
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: I'd be John Brown if I wind up like them.
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: So it's I've always been very acutely aware of my
• 46:12
  Speaker 3: dad's health. Again, if my dad was worried, he never
• 46:18
  Speaker 3: vocalized it. He always had that don't nothing bother me,
• 46:22
  Speaker 3: I bother it, And that's he said all the time.
• 46:26
  Speaker 3: Because when he got diagnosed with diabetes, I remember came
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: home for the summer in ninety nine, my aunt had
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: a party in her house, so most of us were
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: already at the party. My dad came later and he
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: got out of the limousine and he was about twenty
• 46:40
  Speaker 3: twenty five pounds lighter, like it was visible, like my
• 46:43
  Speaker 3: dad see was never He's never a big guy, like
• 46:46
  Speaker 3: I mean, tall and everything, but never like right, wait
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: why And I'm looking at him like and I knew
• 46:55
  Speaker 3: better than to say it to him. I went to
• 46:57
  Speaker 3: my mom. I still was a man box. Yeah, I
• 47:00
  Speaker 3: tell people no one thing about him. He was vain.
• 47:03
  Speaker 3: You could not tell him he didn't look good. You
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: want to fight, tell him some you know, you really
• 47:10
  Speaker 3: don't look that great, baby, You get ready to fight, right,
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: get ready to fight right. So I knew better than
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: to say something to him. So I went to my
• 47:18
  Speaker 3: mom and I was like, what's wrong with my dad?
• 47:20
  Speaker 3: Something's not like I could just see it. And she
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: was like, don't say anything to him, and I'm like,
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: I know better, That's why I'm asking you what's wrong
• 47:27
  Speaker 3: with him? And she said, he has an appointment on Monday.
• 47:30
  Speaker 3: We're gonna go. And that's when he got diagnosed with
• 47:32
  Speaker 3: diabetes HM. So it was always there. So by the
• 47:37
  Speaker 3: end when he started getting hospitalized and you know, the
• 47:41
  Speaker 3: public started becoming aware. It wasn't that it was a
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: sudden onset. This was just years of it. And what
• 47:47
  Speaker 3: happened is he did the very first time he was hospitalized.
• 47:53
  Speaker 3: You all didn't know about it. The public didn't know
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: he had pneumonia, and he got taken to the hospital.
• 47:59
  Speaker 3: That was we were able to keep that quiet. It
• 48:02
  Speaker 3: was the second time he got pneumonia again, like I
• 48:06
  Speaker 3: can't remember. It wasn't there much later after the first time.
• 48:10
  Speaker 3: And so for him, he hated being on pregnanzone cause
• 48:13
  Speaker 3: he I think for him getting diagnosed with diabetes, I
• 48:17
  Speaker 3: think that hit too close to home because my great
• 48:20
  Speaker 3: grandmother was a diabetic and she wound up having her
• 48:23
  Speaker 3: leg amputated and she died shortly after her leg was amputated.
• 48:28
  Speaker 3: So I think for him that that dia coom. Yeah,
• 48:33
  Speaker 3: that diagnosis was triggering, and he was kind of he
• 48:37
  Speaker 3: was in denial about that diagnosis for a long time,
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: Like he would swear up and down, I didn't even
• 48:44
  Speaker 3: have no symptoms, and my mother was like, that's a lie.
• 48:46
  Speaker 3: He had whors, he had excessive urination, he had like
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: she was listening to all the symptoms and he no,
• 48:52
  Speaker 3: I mean I had that, but I have all of it.
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: And I was like, you know, you don't have to
• 48:56
  Speaker 3: have all of.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: The symptoms, So you still had some symptoms.
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: You have it, sir. Yeah. So he went into this
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: this thing where he was like, it's the pregno zone.
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: Pregnano zone is why I got diat diabetes because prolonged
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: use of pregnant zone can lead to diabetes. But I'm like,
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: you you have a family history of it, so it
• 49:19
  Speaker 3: you know. So in his mind he was like, oh,
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna get off pregnant zone because pregnanzone is the
• 49:26
  Speaker 3: reason for this, and if I get off pregnan zone,
• 49:28
  Speaker 3: I'll be fine. And so that's when things started taking
• 49:32
  Speaker 3: a nose died because for whatever reason, cortico steroids seem
• 49:38
  Speaker 3: to be the best treatment to keep sarcodosa symptoms, you know,
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: in check. So the next thing that his doctors gave
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: they were all immune suppressors. And I've said this, I'll
• 49:52
  Speaker 3: keep saying it. I don't think for someone who has
• 49:54
  Speaker 3: an autoimmune disease, I don't think an immune suppression is
• 49:57
  Speaker 3: the best course of action to give them. So the
• 50:00
  Speaker 3: first one he tried was metho trek say. He had
• 50:03
  Speaker 3: a very bad reaction to that. So that was the
• 50:06
  Speaker 3: hospitalization that everybody heard about. That was like, oh my gosh,
• 50:09
  Speaker 3: Brinny Max in the hospital, what's wrong?
• 50:11
  Speaker 2: What's going on?
• 50:12
  Speaker 3: Right? Yeah, that was that one. So they said, okay,
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: well metho trek say doesn't work. Let's go with plaque
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: on neil. Plaqu onil is another immune suppressant, did the
• 50:25
  Speaker 3: same thing, had a toxic reaction to that. So that's
• 50:28
  Speaker 3: when he got hospitalized again. So that's when like the
• 50:30
  Speaker 3: public is looking like.
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: What he's alive?
• 50:33
  Speaker 3: Is he knocking on death doorway? And you know, And
• 50:35
  Speaker 3: so behind the scenes, me and my mom are arguing
• 50:38
  Speaker 3: with him like would you please just go back on
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: pregnant zone please? And he know, I don't want to
• 50:42
  Speaker 3: be on pregna zone. It's gonna have me, you know,
• 50:46
  Speaker 3: but it's what he needed. So he's still hard headed
• 50:49
  Speaker 3: as he is. He says no. So they say, okay,
• 50:52
  Speaker 3: well plack on neil didn't work. Let's go with imiran
• 50:54
  Speaker 3: imron is another immune suppressant. He has, the same thing.
• 50:58
  Speaker 3: Happened this time he gets high hospitalized because by that
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: point the show. They shut everything down because he's not
• 51:04
  Speaker 3: well enough to come back. And I think that did
• 51:07
  Speaker 3: something for him too, because it originally started off where
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: you know, the studio heads and everybody's concerned like is
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: he okay? And then it goes to well when is
• 51:17
  Speaker 3: he getting back? This is like this is costing his money?
• 51:21
  Speaker 3: When are we doing this? And he was filming the show. Yeah,
• 51:25
  Speaker 3: he was filming the show in Ocean's twelve at the
• 51:28
  Speaker 3: same time. And I'll never forget Jerry Wintrob, who was
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: the producer of all the Oceans movies, call him in
• 51:35
  Speaker 3: the hospital and say, hey, yeah, listen, I know, we
• 51:38
  Speaker 3: know you're in the hospital and whatnot, but we really
• 51:40
  Speaker 3: need to do this scene. So why don't I just
• 51:43
  Speaker 3: send a car to you and you just come do
• 51:46
  Speaker 3: your scene? Do you see we have a car take
• 51:48
  Speaker 3: you right back to the hospital. Yo. That is so crazy,
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: like crazy, because what happens if he was a diet
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: at the set, so that's you know, and his right
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: and his manager at the time is like, well, listen,
• 52:02
  Speaker 3: you know they keep calling me, and I was like, yeah,
• 52:04
  Speaker 3: I said, so if he pull a red Fox and
• 52:07
  Speaker 3: die on set, facts, what y'all gonna do, because then
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: there's no show, Like, really, these people really don't care
• 52:15
  Speaker 3: about us, man, And that was to me, that's when
• 52:19
  Speaker 3: I saw a shift because up until that point, you know,
• 52:23
  Speaker 3: especially by that point, he's got the show. Everything centers
• 52:25
  Speaker 3: around you. You are the star of the show. Because
• 52:27
  Speaker 3: we used to have to tell him when he came home,
• 52:29
  Speaker 3: this ain't the set, ain't nobody. But like, because he
• 52:34
  Speaker 3: had gotten to a point.
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: Where he would whistle like he used to live in
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: a certain lifestyle.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: Something.
• 52:41
  Speaker 3: You hear him. And my mother was like, I noticed,
• 52:45
  Speaker 3: man is not whistling for me? What isa? She said, Man, okay,
• 52:53
  Speaker 3: Ronda doesn't really say hers was due like if he
• 52:56
  Speaker 3: got on her nerves, dude, please like that that was hers?
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: But yeah, like I know, he not whistling for me.
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: So you could see like he had reached a point
• 53:05
  Speaker 3: where he's like, yeah he was himself. Yeah, and that happened,
• 53:10
  Speaker 3: and you can see the light kind of go out,
• 53:12
  Speaker 3: like these mofols really do not care about Okay, back,
• 53:18
  Speaker 3: so he said, I tell you what. Yeah, So he said,
• 53:21
  Speaker 3: I tell you what I'm gonna do. It's shut down
• 53:23
  Speaker 3: and definitely and I'm going home. So he came home
• 53:26
  Speaker 3: and like I said, that's when he did the imron,
• 53:29
  Speaker 3: but he got hospitalized because he had a toxic reaction
• 53:31
  Speaker 3: to that. This time he's at home in Northwestern and
• 53:35
  Speaker 3: his pomonologists in the doctor Mike's who that was my girl.
• 53:40
  Speaker 3: She was like, listen, I'm not playing with you. This
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: is not Hollywood. I'm not about to do what you want.
• 53:45
  Speaker 3: You don't like pretnan Zone, but pregnant Zone is what works.
• 53:48
  Speaker 3: You're getting on pregnant Zone and he was trying to
• 53:50
  Speaker 3: fight it, and she was like no, because right now
• 53:52
  Speaker 3: we have to do what work. So he got back
• 53:54
  Speaker 3: on pregnan Zone. So I think that was like what
• 53:57
  Speaker 3: season three? I think you can see yeah, like the
• 54:01
  Speaker 3: how because he hadn't been seasons one and two he
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: was on pregno Zone, but he had been on it
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: so long you couldn't see it because he stopped and
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: had to get you can see like the moon face
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: and like it sounded like his words were slurred because
• 54:15
  Speaker 3: his mouth was so you know, puppy yeah, and he
• 54:18
  Speaker 3: that's what he didn't like. And I'm like, but if
• 54:20
  Speaker 3: you had stayed on pregno.
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: Zone all this time, nothing would have happened.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: And he never quite let go of not being on
• 54:29
  Speaker 3: pregnan zone. And even during that time, like his lung
• 54:34
  Speaker 3: skins had shown the sarcoidosis was in remission in his lungs,
• 54:40
  Speaker 3: but it had caused so much scarring that his lung capacity.
• 54:45
  Speaker 3: They told him it really he was really operating with
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: the capacity of one lung, and they had let him know,
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: not right now, but at some point we're gonna have
• 54:55
  Speaker 3: to have a discussion about a lung transplant because your
• 54:57
  Speaker 3: lungs aren't gonna make it longer than that. Yeah, And
• 55:01
  Speaker 3: so that was that. And once we get to two
• 55:06
  Speaker 3: thousand and eight, like he remained on oxygen for the
• 55:09
  Speaker 3: rest of his for the remainder years because, like I said,
• 55:12
  Speaker 3: he just didn't have it, you know, at that point,
• 55:15
  Speaker 3: he still never let go of not wanting to be
• 55:18
  Speaker 3: on pregnant zone. So the summer of two thousand and
• 55:22
  Speaker 3: he was stubborn, And that stubborn is part of why
• 55:29
  Speaker 3: I was in denial that final hospitalization. I was like
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: that old man that bear ain't going nowhere, like yeah here.
• 55:37
  Speaker 3: So that's kind of what led to his demise. The
• 55:40
  Speaker 3: summer of two thousand and eight, we had worked on
• 55:43
  Speaker 3: soul men we had shot his pilot for his new show,
• 55:47
  Speaker 3: tensively titles starting under and everything was on lock. He goes, well,
• 55:52
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna give me a new doctor and not have
• 55:56
  Speaker 3: this doctor take me off pregnant zone. Wow. This doctor
• 55:59
  Speaker 3: said as well, we're gonna put you on Humera. Now,
• 56:02
  Speaker 3: Humera was supposed to be a once a month injection,
• 56:04
  Speaker 3: but this doctor goes, well, to really get into your system,
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: will be aggressive with it and give you once a
• 56:09
  Speaker 3: week injections. Wow, Humera is an immune suppressant, so you're
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: having the same thing. So we're looking at him. He's sluggish,
• 56:20
  Speaker 3: he's looking and we're like, are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine,
• 56:24
  Speaker 3: And we're like, you think you need to go to
• 56:25
  Speaker 3: the doctor. No, I got an appointment with doctor Mike's
• 56:28
  Speaker 3: next week. Next week, I'll just go then. Well, by
• 56:31
  Speaker 3: the time he gets to his appointment with doctor Mike's,
• 56:33
  Speaker 3: he has pneumonia again, and doctor Mike's south sad. Yeah,
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: like what I never I don't tell a lot of
• 56:42
  Speaker 3: people this. I was pissed. Yeah, that's final when he
• 56:46
  Speaker 3: got you. Yeah, yeah, final time that he got pissed.
• 56:51
  Speaker 3: I mean he got hospitalized. I was pissed. I was like,
• 56:56
  Speaker 3: you did this, Yeah, you did this.
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: But how do you make with that?
• 57:00
  Speaker 3: Because I when I'm listening to your story and stuff,
• 57:02
  Speaker 3: I'm like, damn, like I wonder if he would have
• 57:04
  Speaker 3: still been here. And that's when I when people, because
• 57:09
  Speaker 3: I saw Mike Epps just did Club Shah and he
• 57:13
  Speaker 3: said something about he was on set with my dad
• 57:16
  Speaker 3: during soul Men and my dad was dying during so Men,
• 57:18
  Speaker 3: and I was like, no, he wasn't. He was fine,
• 57:21
  Speaker 3: like you know what I mean, not saying he had
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: those you know, he the same thing, but he was fine.
• 57:25
  Speaker 3: He was a good health, like as far as as
• 57:29
  Speaker 3: best as his health could be given off of his think.
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: He was fine during so Men, right, I mean if
• 57:33
  Speaker 2: he could do a movie, he was fine.
• 57:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because he had to have physicals after that point,
• 57:38
  Speaker 3: you know, to be able, because that's how he lost
• 57:40
  Speaker 3: the role. And what was that movie with John Travolta.
• 57:43
  Speaker 3: Was it Old Old Wild Wild Hogs? Yeah, the Martin
• 57:48
  Speaker 3: Lawrence role. He was My dad was in that and
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: he had passed the physical for it and everything, but
• 57:54
  Speaker 3: the studio was like, well can he take another physical?
• 57:58
  Speaker 3: And he got mad and was like man, listen, and
• 58:00
  Speaker 3: I did everything y'all wanted me to do. Yeah, so
• 58:05
  Speaker 3: he told them, and then they wanted him to pay
• 58:08
  Speaker 3: like a what a one or two million dollar policy
• 58:13
  Speaker 3: and he was like, I ain't doing all of that,
• 58:15
  Speaker 3: so he dropped.
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: They really don't care.
• 58:18
  Speaker 3: They don't get that money by any means necessary, right,
• 58:20
  Speaker 3: They want to make sure are you gonna cost us money?
• 58:23
  Speaker 3: So yeah, so yeah, so that's final. Hospital is say, oh,
• 58:27
  Speaker 3: I was when I tell you, I was heated. I
• 58:32
  Speaker 3: was pissed because to me, it was unnecessary. You had
• 58:35
  Speaker 3: just done what you needed to do, which will stay
• 58:38
  Speaker 3: on the pregnant The pregnant zone. The pregnant zone was
• 58:41
  Speaker 3: only bothering you mentally. Mentally, you just didn't like I
• 58:44
  Speaker 3: don't like that I have to take pregnant zone. That
• 58:46
  Speaker 3: was really it. It wasn't causing any adverse reactions like that.
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: So doctor Mikes tells him, hey, you've got pneumonia. We
• 58:56
  Speaker 3: need to hospitalize you. But they didn't have any beds.
• 58:58
  Speaker 3: She was like, sit tight, let me clear a room
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: for you. He goes, nah, I'm gonna go and run
• 59:05
  Speaker 3: some Errands'm gonna go to the gun range. I'm gonna
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: get my nails done and stuff. I'm gonna do all
• 59:08
  Speaker 3: this other stuff. So he leaves. So by the time
• 59:12
  Speaker 3: he gets back to the hospital, he's in scepsis. Now
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: that's how far his body is the teary rate.
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: So yeah, I can only imagine how much pain he
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: was in.
• 59:23
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, It's like, I don't know, It's like I
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: kind of felt like he knew something was coming, you know.
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: I say this all the time to people. My dad
• 59:32
  Speaker 3: always said to He told all of us he was
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: not gonna live to be an old man. He always
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: said it. He didn't believe he was gonna live to
• 59:40
  Speaker 3: see his fiftieth birthday. And now, in hindsight, I remember
• 59:44
  Speaker 3: on his fiftieth birthday, I went over to my parents'
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: house and I was like, hi, old man, you were wrong.
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: You made it. You're fifty, And he looked at me
• 59:52
  Speaker 3: and just went yeah, m And I think about that, like,
• 59:58
  Speaker 3: I wonder if he knew, because even I and two
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 3: thousand and eight, So in May of two thousand and eight,
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 3: we shot the pilot for his TV show that was
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 3: gonna be on Fox, and I had a moment. I
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 3: remember walking into his dressing room and he was sitting
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 3: on the couch and there was a bunch of people
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 3: talking to him, and I remember looking at him and
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 3: I just had this voice go, You're never gonna do
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 3: this again. And I remember looking at him and thinking,
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 3: this isn't happening again. Now. I didn't think that meant
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 3: he was gonna die. Right in my mind. I just thought,
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 3: like I thought, maybe the show wasn't gonna get picked up.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 3: He's lost, you know, he's not enamored with his career anymore.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: I had my daughter. He loved being a grandfather and
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: being home with her. I was like, he's gonna say,
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 3: I don't want to do this.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: No, miss slow down.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I was like, that's what's gonna happen. I didn't know.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: I didn't think it meant he was about to die.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 3: This concludes part one of this week's episode. Part two
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 3: is dropping next week. But if you have any comments, questions,
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: or concerns you just want to say, hey, go hey,
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 3: please make sure to email me at hello at thepsgpodcast
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: dot com. Y'all. I hope y'all enjoy part one. I
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 3: really really really can't wait for you all to hear
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 3: part two. It's very emotional but it was just such
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 3: a beautiful conversation.
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: So until next time, everyone later.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 3: Pretty Private is a production of the Black Effect podcast Network.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 3: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 3: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 3: to subscribe and rate the show, and you can connect
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 3: with me on social media at Pretty Private Podcasts.