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Friendship Ends · Let's Ask the Mamas!

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We got a question for our American mama's. Dear mamas,
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: how do you deal when a friendship ends? Well, let's
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: ask our American mama's mama, mama, she said, and joining
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: us now we're American mama's tern Edville and Kimberly Burlison. Boy,
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: this question kind of strikes a nerve. Do you how
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: do y'all deal when when friendships end?
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: You know, I always knew that there were seasons of friendships.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: My mom always shared that with me. You know, when
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: friendships would happen and they end. She say, it's a season.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: But there is one friendship in particular that hurt me
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: because I loved her so much. Lived in Salt Lake
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: City with her. We were both flight attendants for Delta.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: We did everything, we traveled, we you know, just my
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: best friend at the time. Years past, I go, I
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: come back to Texas. She moves away, she gets married,
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: she has three children. I have three children. I keep
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: trying to connect with her and she's just not gonnecting
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: with me, And I'm like, what what happened? I don't
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: understand it because I loved this girl. Finally, we have
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: a conversation and she said to me, she said kimberly,
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: during that time of living in Utah was a dark
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: time in my life with choices that I made other people,
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: She says, you were the bright spot. You were the
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: bright person in my life and my saving grace, but
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  Speaker 2: everything else. So when I talk to you, i'm back there.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: You remind me of a time that I want to
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: forget because my life has moved on. And she said,
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: and I hate that because I love you and I
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: wish that we could have a friendship now, But it
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: just takes me to a dark place because I remember,
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: and it crushed me. But I understood that makes sense.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: It made you so much sense. But I never thought
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: about the ending of friendships. And you don't know what's
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: really doing what you know, you think it's all about
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: you and it had nothing to do with me. Wow,
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: you know, but it made me.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: How many years did you go thinking that you think
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: I did something?
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: Yes, but I thought, you know, that's such a great
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: way to explain if there is a season ending in
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: a friendship, to just say go in peace. You are
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: the best part of this time in my life. But
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: you know, but it maybe feel better, but it still
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: hurt me. I still see her today and I comment
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: and like stuff, but oh I'm miss her, miss her
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: so much.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this one, this one because over the last several years,
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: I've lost a lot of friends, like people that I
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: was closest to that reasons or I don't fully know.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: I don't fully know. Some of it was you know, divorced,
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: some of it was you know, other things going on.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: Maybe some of it's political. I don't know, but there
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: were just you know, people that you gave a lot
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: to and then they're just gone and they won't return
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: a phone call, they won't return to text, and I
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: don't have I don't know, I don't understand, but okay,
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: and I feel like at this point my job is
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: just simply just to keep a door open, yeah, in
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: case they ever want to come back. But if they don't, okay,
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: I just I kind of feel like that's that's where
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: I am. But I have I've lost a lot of
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: friends over the last five ten years.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: Wow, so interesting, And it could be something like what
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Kimberly just said, maybe they were going through something themselves.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Other things. Yeah, absolutely absolutely.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: If I've lost friends.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I don't know's because everybody loves Terry.
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: Well, I mean, I will say. The last time that
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: I had like a real break in friendship, it was
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: middle school girls stuff where the mom's got in Bob,
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: we shouldn't have oh yeah, yeah yeah. And but since
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: then we've all kind of reconnected, like, look, that was
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: water in the ridge. If my advice to anybody. Even
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: told our little sister Lindsay, when her daughter was entering
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: that pace, girls are going to have girls stuff, and
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: it's hard. Girls in middle school, in high school are
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: going to go through stuff with their friends and sometimes
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: people who are not friends. But it's just sometimes for
• 4:05
  Speaker 3: whatever reason, it's just really hard for little girls. And
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  Speaker 3: my greatest advice is as moms, stay out of it,
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: like give your child advice, but continue the friendship with
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: the mom so the girls can see this is what
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: you do. You rise above that. So we're all fine.
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: And it's so funny because I remember summer my daughter
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: said one time, she said, Mom, did you ever like,
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: did you ever get bullied? Or did girls ever not
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: like you? I said, somewhere if they didn't like me,
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  Speaker 3: I did not know if they were rude to me.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: I thought, oh, they must be having a bad day.
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: Give be me. Yeah, I haven't done anything to them.
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  Speaker 3: So I really was so clueless. And also, though we
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: didn't have social media, I didn't know when I was
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  Speaker 3: left out or not invited to sleep over, or not
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  Speaker 3: included in this party. I didn't know, so it didn't
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: bother me. And our parents had us in such a
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: bubble that my siblings there some of us. We were
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: like each other's besties. And so I guess if I've
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: lost friends, it's okay because I still love them. I
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: will tell you this. I don't want people to tell
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: me when someone else is something negative about me. I
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: don't want to know it. And I've told people when
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: someone said so and so said this. I don't want
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: to know because I'll treat them differently. And I don't
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: want to because they'll eventually come back around. They were
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: venting about me. They didn't like something I said or
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: something I did, and they didn't feel like they could
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: come to me about it. But they're telling you, you
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: don't tell me because I want to be able to
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: continue to be myself to them. I don't have to
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: be completely clueless about who doesn't like me, because I
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: want to continue to love everybody and be nice to everybody.
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: But it does hurt, you know, back in those days
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: when we had that break, it hurt me because I
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: loved these moms so much, and then I reached out
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: to them a couple of years later. It's like, Okay,
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: water under the bridge. I love y'all. I'm sorry if
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: I helped perpetuate something negative, you know, with regard to
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: our friendship. But it's over with me. I mean, I'm fine.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: If you like sucure American mam was a question, go
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: to our website American Grount Radio dot com slash mamas
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: and click on the ask the Mama's button. Terry Needville
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: can't really brother listen. Thank you so much.
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: Thank you,