Latest / The One Small Change Podcast / Enhancing Networking Through Tactical Questions with Rob Ruder

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Enhancing Networking Through Tactical Questions with Rob Ruder · The One Small Change Podcast

0:00
Welcome to the One Small Change, and I am thrilled that you're taking time out
0:04
of your life to come on this journey of exploration and transformation.
0:08
I'm your host, Yvonne McCoy, and I bring almost 30 years of entrepreneurial
0:12
experience and passion for discovering growth through the power of
0:16
seemingly small change. And I want to thank you
0:19
for joining me and doing this, and I'm hoping that you're gonna find
0:23
some inspiration that's gonna help you through the week. And this week,
0:27
we are talking with an amazing person that I came to
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know, Rob Ruder. Rob,
0:35
thank you for being here and taking time out of your very, very busy
0:39
schedule. And what I want is I want you to tell
0:43
us a little bit about what you do, and share with you how
0:46
the small change that you're gonna share had an impact on you either
0:50
personally or professionally. Okay. Well, thank you,
0:54
Yvonne. I appreciate you sharing your platform with me and
0:58
give me an opportunity to talk today. I am,
1:01
as you mentioned, Rob Ruder with Idic Designs. Infinite
1:05
Diversity and Infinite Combinations. And I've been
1:09
a business owner for, 23
1:12
years. I started my business in 2001.
1:18
And it has been a
1:22
business discovery of what I do. And so there's a lot of
1:26
things that I have accomplished.
1:30
Technology is my main focus. But one
1:33
things that I've been in lately has been cybersecurity.
1:38
And the challenge of the cybersecurity
1:42
world is not so much the
1:45
technology issues of it. There are a lot of resources and things. But
1:49
it's communicating with people, especially in networking settings.
1:53
I'm sure you do networking and
1:56
working to grow your business. And the
2:00
one small thing I've discovered is that when I walk
2:03
into a network situation and announce I'm in
2:07
cybersecurity, nobody wants to talk with
2:10
me. But I
2:14
have discovered through through some recent education over the
2:18
last year that I can grow my business when I
2:21
turn around and actually approach somebody
2:25
and say, what what makes your business
2:29
so special? And what are you trying to accomplish?
2:33
So when I take the focus off of what I can do for
2:37
them and or I'm sorry. What if I take the focus
2:41
off of what I am looking to do for
2:45
them and instead let them share with me
2:48
what they're looking for, and I use my
2:52
resources in their, to their benefit.
2:56
They're more receptive to what I do. And and isn't that
3:00
that old saying nobody cares what you know until they know that you
3:04
care? Exactly. And and other
3:07
people like to talk about themselves. So
3:11
if they're listening to you talk,
3:16
it's nod your head. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
3:21
But not only are you nodding your head, let's let that you're actually
3:24
actively listening. I think that, you know, one of one
3:28
of the big changes for me about networking is
3:32
I well, first of all, I came to networking very late.
3:36
And so when I first started networking, it it was I'm
3:40
going to get a client. When I
3:43
made that shift of I'm not going to be a client, I'm
3:47
coming to help the community and to help people
3:51
and took the the eye off myself, not only did it
3:54
open me up to potential clients, but it
3:58
opened me up to collaborations and a whole lot of other things. I mean, if
4:01
you go in with that narrow view of I'm only looking for a client,
4:05
you've lost opportunities. Exactly.
4:09
And that and that was the lesson I learned, in my
4:13
local area. So as a as a cybersecurity specialist,
4:17
I needed to grow my network. I had built a business on on the
4:21
back of just like 4 or 5 clients. I didn't have
4:25
a wealth of of individuals that I was talking to.
4:28
And so my mentor in marketing told me I
4:32
needed to go out and do in person marketing because my
4:35
best audience was local. But one
4:39
of the things I found was it didn't work. Because
4:43
nobody I get I get have this statement of
4:47
what I did and nobody would approach me. So then I did
4:50
discover somebody who said it's about communication,
4:56
connection, connecting with people with what they want
5:00
to be talking about, and then collaboration with them
5:04
to help them achieve what they're after.
5:08
So, you know, one of the things that I think is interesting about you
5:12
I mean, there are lots of things that are interesting about you. You know, one
5:15
of the things that we share is kind of, you know, how do people learn
5:19
and how they educate, and we we'll put a plug in for that later.
5:22
But, one of the things that I found really
5:26
interesting with working with you is most people
5:29
are networking online. You do the majority of your networking
5:33
in person. Mhmm. Right. You know, in some
5:37
ways, that seems to me to be like, I'm a I'm a
5:41
cyber person, but I'm networking person. I don't
5:45
And it it is. And the the issue
5:49
is sometimes there is a different
5:52
relationship you have when you see somebody 1 on 1. And
5:56
I think anyone who is digital
6:00
should also be looking at their local area. Now,
6:05
I, the to be fair, there are some really small
6:08
communities out there with very few people. But if you're
6:12
in any city of any size, I think you should be both
6:15
online and offline. Because you develop skills
6:19
in both places that are really valuable,
6:23
especially having these conversations like we're having
6:27
today. Well, you know, you are you
6:31
are a cyber you are a tech person, but one of the things we talked
6:34
about was developing relationships. And so
6:38
you've got an interesting, take on that.
6:42
And it comes both from, a clarity exercise
6:45
that that we've been doing in a group that we're in, but it also comes
6:49
from a couple of people that you're following now. Right.
6:52
So can you share a couple of things from that that that could help
6:56
us? So the
7:00
the primary the the simple rule that I
7:04
have whenever I go into a networking situation
7:08
is ask more questions than
7:11
give answers. Because the
7:15
point of connecting with somebody
7:19
is to not be satisfied with
7:24
the obvious answer. So I'll I'll
7:28
give a give a quick example. I had a call with
7:31
somebody, and they were approaching me about
7:35
cybersecurity. And simply
7:39
saying, tell me about your cybersecurity program.
7:43
And I said, well, could I ask you a
7:47
question first? And she said, sure. And I said,
7:51
well, let me let me ask this. What
7:54
changed? You've been in business for
7:59
4 year you know, for 5 or 6 months now.
8:03
And you're you've told me your story about how you have
8:06
such big clients that you work with.
8:10
And now you're suddenly concerned about cybersecurity.
8:15
What I wanna know is what changed?
8:19
And she suddenly opened up and
8:22
said, well, my client wants to send me
8:26
computers and do all this stuff so that they're protected.
8:31
And that started a whole long conversation
8:35
that it wasn't me selling what I did. It was
8:39
just us exploring her business and the
8:43
challenges and issues she needed to be aware of. Well,
8:46
you know, I think one of the things first of all, I I love that
8:49
question, what changed? I mean, what what I say is why now?
8:53
You know, what made it different? You know, this now becomes an urgent
8:57
issue for you. And a lot of times, like like you
9:00
said, what they're coming to you for is not really
9:04
what the issue is, or it's not the the thing that they
9:07
need to do. And I think the other thing that is,
9:13
to me important in part of the connection is when you're asking
9:17
why now and you're asking questions about their business,
9:21
then they see that you're not just giving them an out of the box
9:25
solution. It the the the solution that you
9:29
have is for them. You know,
9:33
you're considering all the parts in the movie. I you know, one of the things
9:36
I often say is people kind of have a have a same pattern that they
9:40
have to move through, but they stay in different places for different amount of
9:44
times based on So you may have to use all 4 of your,
9:47
you know, skills or tools or whatever that you have, but you use
9:51
them differently, which is what makes what you have to offer
9:55
so customized and so personalized, it makes you stand above
9:59
the crowd. So can you
10:02
give us some examples of some of the other questions that you asked? I mean,
10:06
what changed is a great question. So so some of some
10:10
of the other ones I take I take this perspective
10:13
from a a speaker, by the name of
10:17
Beck Holland. And the thing I've I've learned
10:20
here is as an expert, I
10:24
have as you and I talk a lot, we have systems. We
10:28
have our our our knowledge in how we do things
10:32
and so on. But our customer or potential
10:35
customer is trying to achieve
10:39
something. And they have one of 2 primary problems.
10:43
One of those problems is that they have a
10:47
misdiagnosis. They have gone and looked out
10:51
there at the world of the internet and said,
10:54
Oh. I need this.
10:58
And they don't understand what we understand.
11:02
And so they have misdiagnosed the problem that they
11:05
have. So we should be asking them, Why do you think
11:09
that? How what's your, you know, what's your proof
11:13
that this is what needs to to change?
11:17
And the other one she talks about is very close.
11:21
So listen carefully to the difference. But the other is
11:24
missed diagnosis.
11:28
They're busy looking at the the
11:34
vehicles stopped with red lights in front of them.
11:38
And they're not paying attention to the sports car going,
11:42
you know, a 150 miles an hour coming up behind them.
11:46
And which one is the problem they need to solve.
11:50
And so that's where where we have to help them
11:53
understand what it is you're looking for,
11:57
and do you really need the solution,
12:02
or is there something else you should be concerned about?
12:06
Well, you know, one of the things I think
12:09
that that I love
12:13
with working with you is that you are always asking
12:17
questions. I mean, it's like, you know, part of part of my
12:21
plus and my minus, you know, it's like your greatest strength is also your biggest
12:24
weakness. Right? So I'm the person that always like, this is the problem, here's
12:28
the solution, let's go. Right? And so I have to slow
12:32
myself down because, you know, to
12:35
go through the steps. But the
12:39
more that you can connect, the more that you can ask and
12:43
dig in, even though you think you know the
12:46
answer or the answer is obvious to you, the more the
12:50
connection I mean, one one I learned this lesson,
12:54
in a totally unrelated thing where I was doing a a person's tax
12:57
return or what, you know, and it was it was a little old
13:01
lady who had a retirement. So, I mean, it
13:05
was like it wasn't even before computers, and it was zip, zip,
13:09
zip, zip, and we were done. And I got a client complaint
13:12
because she said, she didn't ask me these questions.
13:16
She didn't ask me if I was over 65. She didn't ask me
13:20
if I got the x you know? And I was like, well, she was over
13:23
65 the year before in her tax return. I figured it
13:27
was. Right? Yeah. But she did not feel at all as
13:31
I mean, I did not connect with her at all. And the flip
13:34
side of that coin was I got somebody whose tax
13:38
return was really complicated that I didn't understand
13:42
at all, and I asked that man every question
13:45
that I could think of, you know, aside from what color is your
13:49
underwear. Mhmm. And he said to me, I never had
13:53
anybody take this much interest in my tax return before.
13:56
And I was like, that's because I don't know what I'm doing.
14:00
But but but but but but sometimes we know so
14:04
well Mhmm. And the situation
14:08
that they have is normal or
14:12
small in our world. Mhmm. But we all wanna think our problem
14:15
is important. We all wanna think that our situation is unique
14:19
and be able to help people see.
14:23
Yes. I understand. That is you know, I can see how that could be
14:27
unique to you. So I think part of the other question that you have to
14:30
ask is, you know, what problems is
14:34
this causing you? Yep. Because,
14:39
What's the impact? Yeah. What is the impact? So, you know,
14:43
for some people, the impact could be, you know, I can't handle, you know,
14:46
payments. For somebody else, it might be, I just can't
14:50
track what's going on or whatever. And and what I do know
14:53
about you is that you're very good at the
14:57
data stuff. So talk about
15:01
this may be not what you intended to talk about, but if you could just
15:04
take a minute. For me, one of the big issues with networking
15:08
is is the follow-up. And, of course, you can get all the networking things, make
15:12
all the connections you want. But if you don't follow-up,
15:16
you know, you wasted you wasted your time. So do you have any
15:20
any Sure. So it well, I think
15:24
I think the hint the hint is is right there in the question you
15:27
asked about the data. And I
15:31
so so full disclosure time. You're
15:35
right. Follow-up is the biggest, you know, is the biggest
15:38
issue. In fact, even my marketing coach
15:42
identified, you know, at not too long ago. She
15:46
said, Rob, your problem is you need to get
15:49
better at the follow-up. You're great at meeting people. You're
15:53
great at having warm, generous
15:57
first conversations, she says, but you have to follow-up
16:01
because the deal isn't gonna happen in the first
16:05
conversation. It's gonna be the second or the third. And
16:08
so I finally after years of resisting
16:12
it, I finally had to break down and get
16:16
a simple very simple. I don't want complicated things. I
16:20
want a simple customer relationship management
16:23
database that helps me track where I'm
16:27
at in the conversation with somebody. So if I set a
16:31
goal that I want to schedule an
16:34
appointment with them, the first thing is I need to reach out and see if
16:38
there's something we can talk about. The next thing is to
16:41
respond to them and then schedule an appointment.
16:45
And I have to be that methodical. And that's where
16:49
systems and systems thinking comes in. So so
16:52
just let me ask you, you don't have to say what you're using, but
16:56
does that does that, CRM that you have help
17:00
you put in, like, part of the conversation that you have with
17:03
them? Yeah. So It covers it covers and
17:07
my criteria for choosing this CRM was
17:10
it had to have a pipeline. It had to be
17:14
strategic in helping me know where am I at in
17:18
this in this relationship. The second part of it
17:21
had to be that it allowed me to track notes
17:25
and, of course, the important how to reach them, contact them.
17:28
But the third part was it had to be zero cost,
17:32
because there's no point in buying
17:36
something that I pay for over and over and over again if I'm not
17:39
using it. So, you know, someday, maybe I'll need a
17:43
complex one and complicate it with all kinds of bells and whistles.
17:47
But right now, I'm a solopreneur. I need one that
17:51
small, easy to use, and
17:54
consistent with my goal of being follow
17:57
through. So here I wanna jump into into
18:01
your your specific,
18:06
what you do. I mean, and and Yeah. So when you go network, nobody
18:10
wants to talk to you about cybersecurity. And so one of
18:13
the things that I'm finding is the
18:17
more I network, the more
18:21
I become aware of a lot of things that are happening. So for instance, I
18:25
just I just had did something. Somebody tried to use my booking
18:28
link. And when I went in to check it, it came up suspicious
18:32
link because it's I made it into a Bitly link. And
18:35
so, you know, there's so much weird stuff that's going on in the
18:39
Internet. Right. When we're networking or
18:42
or I don't even know what the you know, sometimes you have the the right
18:45
question. I'm not sure I have the right question. Is it
18:49
do we need to be more concerned about cybersecurity the more we
18:53
network, or do we need to be concerned about cybersecurity
18:57
in general and networking is just one of the areas that
19:00
it'll impact? Can I say both?
19:04
Sure. Go for it. So so
19:08
my my position my position is this.
19:12
Every business owner needs to be concerned about cybersecurity
19:18
in the sense that they need to be building a
19:21
plan for their business.
19:25
And it's now when they're small businesses is the
19:28
best time. Because I've been I I have
19:32
clients that are big businesses, and they spent tens of 1,000 of
19:36
dollars to get their cybersecurity
19:40
done. Whereas a small business with a little
19:43
bit of guidance can build their plan of
19:47
what they're going to do. And then if something were to happen
19:51
to them and say a state attorney general
19:55
knocked at their door and said, what did you do to protect
19:58
our citizens, you know, from this breach?
20:03
If they don't have a plan, they're liable
20:06
for failing to protect the data that
20:10
they're responsible for. On the other hand,
20:15
there is always a need. The more you spread
20:18
yourself out there, we have to be more protected because
20:22
we don't know who we're coming in contact with. So
20:26
monitoring your systems and monitoring
20:30
your identity is really important. And that's
20:33
where you'll hear lots more people talk about dark
20:37
web and dark web searches and things like that. Because
20:41
that's what we do to find out if, in
20:44
fact, we've been compromised already, and there's
20:48
work to be done. So
20:52
that brings us to your gift.
20:57
Exactly. Yes. So so tell us about what you know, and
21:00
then I want you to give us a couple of steps that we need to
21:03
take. Okay. So
21:07
so the gift is that one of the things I do in my
21:11
cyber security business is I help my clients
21:15
track whether or not their email
21:19
address, their passwords, their
21:22
contact information. Things have been compromised and released
21:27
to the dark web. So dark web is
21:31
this hidden but very vibrant
21:35
environment where people buy and sell, but mostly what they buy and sell
21:39
is illegal, including people's identities.
21:42
So I have a tool that lets me put in your email
21:46
address and give you a report that shows
21:50
you whether or not your domain or whether your
21:53
email address has been compromised. So I
21:57
can do that for free, and then follow-up with
22:00
you, to share that document with you
22:04
and answer questions, that you may have about
22:08
your business tech. That is
22:11
amazing, and that is really generous. Any gift of time. Information
22:15
is a wonderful gift, but information plus time
22:19
is even more valuable. So give us a couple of quick steps
22:22
before we end. We're gonna run out of time. Okay. You suggest
22:27
So couple of quick steps. 1, focus on
22:30
physical security. So
22:34
number one thing is be aware around it. If you do
22:38
business, you know, if you do business in a coffee shop, don't get up
22:42
and walk away from your your laptop or or things like
22:46
that. You always need to be aware of who has access
22:50
to your resources, to that. Biggest breaches have
22:53
often been people threw a laptop on their passenger,
22:58
seat. And then their car got broken into and the data
23:02
stolen. The other the other thing
23:06
is write your policies down
23:10
and your procedures for maintaining your system.
23:14
Because you have all this knowledge in your
23:17
head or you're maybe you have a VA who has
23:21
that knowledge in their head. If that knowledge was suddenly
23:24
lost, what would happen?
23:28
So if you want to if you want your business to
23:31
thrive and to be resilient,
23:35
you need to write it down in a document and
23:39
have multiple copies of it. So you can't
23:43
lose it in a fire or anything. And how how
23:46
often should how often should we back up on a, like,
23:50
an external driver or something like that? As often
23:54
as you want, you would not want to have to go back and
23:58
recreate what you lost. Okay. So
24:01
so it's always a as I always measure it in that, you know,
24:05
what's your time worth? And then the idea is how
24:08
much of your time do you wanna repeat because you lost
24:13
Yeah. That data. Alright. Here's your
24:16
question. When was the last time you did something new for the first
24:20
time? Oh my.
24:24
1st first for the or yeah.
24:31
Boy, that is a good question.
24:37
I unfortunately, I have been spending so much time at
24:41
home that I'm trying to think of what it what it would
24:45
have been that I've done first. It could have been in the summertime.
24:50
Yeah. But that's that's how habitual my life is. It's like
24:54
going you know? I do I do so much the same thing. I
24:57
I was thinking I was thinking it was sometime when when I was
25:01
with, my cousin. I did have I did have,
25:06
well, okay. Here's here's one. So I went,
25:10
a first for me was to go to the
25:14
same play, live play, with the
25:18
same actors, 40 years after the
25:21
first time I saw it. That's amazing.
25:26
Yeah. Yeah. It was it was it was one of those
25:29
things. In the 1980s, they had they had put together this
25:33
play when they were college students. And
25:37
this summer, they got back together
25:41
and did the play again. They had never done it
25:44
since. But for for various reasons, they
25:48
all got back together, and I had a chance to go watch them. So it
25:51
was kinda like a time warp. Yep. Time warp. Yeah. It was a cute time
25:55
warp. They were they were, one line of
25:59
the play was modified a little bit. And it says it it
26:02
was, when did when did you turn when did you
26:06
go from 12 to 60? Because
26:10
40 years ago. Yeah.
26:14
Alright. We are running out of time, and and I think and Rob and I
26:18
have talked for a long period of time. One of the things
26:22
I'm gonna, there gonna be some additional information
26:26
that's that you're gonna wanna get, but you definitely wanna grab that gift. And
26:29
so, you know, I have to I have to be sure to say
26:33
to you as a podcaster, be sure you subscribe and share and engage
26:37
in social media so that you can supercharge your
26:40
business through connection, which we talked about. And the podcast
26:45
is my way of giving back to the community and helping you fuel your quest
26:49
for growth and impact in a way that can be fun and
26:53
just enjoyable. So I hope you will continue to join me in the
26:56
one small change and and, you know, look
27:00
for the tiniest shifts that's gonna give you some kind
27:04
of monumental transformation. And you can go and listen to the first
27:07
the first episode and some of the other ones if you've missed them.
27:11
And, Rob, before I let you go, you
27:15
got some last words of wisdom?
27:20
I would so so this is when it came up recently.
27:25
To this comes from John Paul Sartre.
27:29
And that is, to believe
27:33
is to know you believe. And to know
27:37
you believe is not to believe.
27:40
So the answer is be sure.
27:44
Have experience with it and know you've done it.
27:48
Not believe that you did it.
27:52
It's pretty heavy.
27:55
Welcome to my world. Welcome to your world. I have to tell you
27:59
that Rob is is a very thoughtful person and
28:03
poses these interesting questions in the group that we're in,
28:06
and, we're gonna invite you to something so that you can
28:10
you can experience that, once a month. But I
28:14
want you to remember that change is simple, but it's not always
28:17
easy. And it takes a certain amount of
28:21
courage, and it takes a certain amount of resilience, and it takes
28:25
a definitely takes curiosity to step out of your your
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comfort zone. So if you'll join me on the one small change every
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week as we embark on this journey for you to come up with innovative
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possibilities, that would be fantastic because I love
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connecting with you. And until the next time, stay
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curious. Rob, thank you for all your time and your thoughts.