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Transcript

Money, Marriage & the Holidays: Choosing Peace Over Pressure · HAVE FAITH LET IT BEGIN®

• 0:43
  Hello everyone and welcome to Have Faith, Let It Begin. My name is Angel.
• 0:47
  Today's episode is one that every couple at some point can relate to.
• 0:52
  We're calling this money, marriage, and the holidays.
• 0:56
  Keeping peace when finances can be tight.
• 0:59
  Because when the holiday comes around, something else comes around too.
• 1:03
  Stress. Money. Money stress.
• 1:06
  Finances have a funny way of turning peaceful home into a pressure cooker.
• 1:11
  And during the holidays, that pressure gets multiplied by gifts,
• 1:16
  gatherings, expectations, travel, decorations, and that inner voice saying, are we doing enough?
• 1:24
  Are we spending too much? Are we going to regret this later?
• 1:29
  And before you know it, two people who love each other suddenly find themselves
• 1:34
  arguing over wrapping paper or a toy or which sale to scratch.
• 1:40
  Did I say scratch? I think I did. Or which sale to catch. That's what I meant to say.
• 1:46
  Hey, we keep everything in here, right? Sometimes you end up arguing over whether
• 1:51
  you should or shouldn't buy this or have to or buy that or did you or did you not do that?
• 1:57
  If you've ever seen this or you've ever been there, then you definitely know you're not alone.
• 2:03
  Newsflash, you're in a marriage. I remember one year, I watched a couple at
• 2:08
  a store have one of those holiday whisper arguments.
• 2:12
  You know the ones, the smiling on the outside but burning on the inside kind.
• 2:17
  One of them said, you're for that. The other said, but it's for the kids, we have to.
• 2:23
  And suddenly the tension was louder than the Christmas music playing overhead.
• 2:27
  And I thought, how many families are going through this right now? More than we realize.
• 2:33
  So the truth is, money doesn't cause problems. Pressure does.
• 2:38
  The pressure to live up to the expectations. The pressure to not disappoint
• 2:43
  loved ones. The pressure to keep up with others.
• 2:46
  The pressure to make Christmas magical, even when the budget is tight.
• 2:52
  And here's the thing. Most holiday arguments between couples aren't actually about money.
• 2:58
  They're about fear, insecurity, wanting to feel appreciated,
• 3:03
  wanting to provide, wanting the kids to be happy, and wanting the moment to be special.
• 3:10
  But here's the good news. You don't need perfect finances to have a beautiful holiday.
• 3:15
  Money comes and goes. Sales come and go. But the love between two people, that is what lasts.
• 3:23
  You can have a tight budget, a strong marriage. You can have financial stress
• 3:28
  and still have holiday peace.
• 3:31
  You can disagree. You can disagree without disconnecting.
• 3:36
  Because at the end of the day, it's not about the price of the presents.
• 3:40
  It's not about the presence of the people.
• 3:43
  So let me bring up a scripture that I just read.
• 3:48
  And I'm going to do my best to say it right. It's Iscalisius.
• 3:52
  I can never say it right.
• 3:54
  Why is the pastor, Jim, going to love me for this?
• 3:57
  But it's in chapter 4, verse 9. And it's through 10. It says, two are better than one.
• 4:02
  For if either of them falls, one can help the other up.
• 4:08
  Holiday money issues are not a you problem.
• 4:12
  They're a we problem. And God didn't design you to face them alone.
• 4:16
  So here's some practical tips
• 4:18
  for your couples here. Here are a few things that you can try this week.
• 4:22
  I find it easy, simple, and sometimes powerful.
• 4:26
  Set a budget. Set a budget together. Not one person deciding.
• 4:31
  Both hearts and both voices matter.
• 4:34
  Pick a spending limit per kid, per person. This turns arguments into teamwork.
• 4:41
  Remember, kids value time more than gifts.
• 4:45
  Games, laughter, hot chocolate, baking, those become the lifelong memories.
• 4:50
  Give present gifts, a note, a memory, a walk together, a prayer together. Time is the best gift.
• 4:59
  Say this out loud to each other. We are on the same team because you really are.
• 5:06
  Honey, can you get that phone for me? So you see, even answering the phone for
• 5:10
  me while I'm recording, that helps.
• 5:13
  Oh, say that you're on the same team because you really are.
• 5:17
  If you're listening today and your marriage has been tense lately,
• 5:21
  I want you to hear this. You're not failing.
• 5:24
  You're not alone. You're not broken. You're human. And your marriage can get through this.
• 5:30
  The holidays don't have to break you. They can strengthen you.
• 5:33
  All it takes is grace, patience, listening, and love, and the willingness to
• 5:40
  choose peace over pressure.
• 5:42
  Let's pray. Heavenly Father, we lift up every couple listening today.
• 5:47
  Lord, you know the pressure that face, that we all face and they face as a marriage,
• 5:52
  a couple, financially, emotionally, and spiritually.
• 5:55
  Bring unity where there is stress. Bring understanding where there is a tension.
• 6:00
  Bring peace where there is worry.
• 6:03
  Remind each couple, each marriage, each relationship that love is stronger than
• 6:08
  finances and that you are at the center and they can overcome anything together.
• 6:15
  Bless their home, bless their conversations, and bless their hearts.
• 6:19
  In Jesus' name we pray, amen.
• 6:21
  Thank you for joining me today. Remember, the best holiday gift you can give
• 6:25
  is love, grace, and understanding.
• 6:29
  Have faith, let it begin. Let me go get that phone now.
• 6:33
  Hey, Have Faith family. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share the podcast with your friends.
• 6:39
  Visit our website, havefaithletitbegin.com. We would love to hear your feedback.