Latest / Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha / Rabbi Moshe Haber- Perashat Va'ethanan The Gift of Life: Cultivating Gratitude 8.8.25
Transcript
- 0:00But from opera shot made hanan. So I have a question, please,
- 0:06says I begged Hashem. You've started to show us you're
- 0:30a great Mike and no one's like you in the whole world and
- 0:34you're showing your strength and therefore Hashem amazed me every
- 0:37now can I please the artist can at least see the land out of
- 0:41Asher baby again a heart out of azer have I live unknown Hashem
- 0:47Musher says I begged Hashem I plead with him to be able to go
- 0:52into the land to go to see the land, which means Musher ever
- 0:54really wanted to be able to live to go in there to sell and via
- 0:59Khanan. We know there's a gematria.
- 1:01He prayed was it 515 * 100 and 100 times he begged pleaded and
- 1:10really went to the fullest extent to pray to go into the
- 1:13land and we know as opposed to says he was not allowed.
- 1:17He was told the answer is no, he cannot go in even though he
- 1:20prayed so much. This is the opening of the
- 1:21parishah Mushi Italians, the Jewish people.
- 1:24So my question is why do Bunai is so need to know this?
- 1:29Why does it need to be told that I begged and I pleaded to go in.
- 1:35They're going in, they're going on without him.
- 1:38What is his purpose and his closing message and tell them
- 1:43how much he bet. And the way he says it is that
- 1:45it's Hannan or she says and hanun ELA bikoma komala.
- 1:49So matanatrinam. I asked for Matanatrinam, which
- 1:53as she explains means he might say, I don't believe I deserve
- 1:56it. I'm not calling because of any
- 1:57credit. I'm just asking Hashem, can you
- 1:59please grant me the gift of going in?
- 2:02I begged for that, I pleaded for it and I was not.
- 2:04I was not answered. I was not accepted.
- 2:07Why is he asking? Why is he telling them that he
- 2:09is? That's my question.
- 2:11See, it's a gift. I think it's time based, very
- 2:15important concept. That's what we want to build.
- 2:18I'm a shit. Everybody trying to tell them
- 2:19you're going in, I'm not going in.
- 2:21I want you to know and what you're doing and the life you're
- 2:24about to live is completely and totally a gift.
- 2:28It's not deserved in the slaves. If I'm what should have been
- 2:32who, if anyone deserves to go in, it's me.
- 2:35I did everything in my power to lead, to go in there, to stay.
- 2:39In fact, I'm the reason in a certain sense.
- 2:41I did see how much I am, which is on its way that it's so I'm a
- 2:44town Surah or just on its way. I led the people in the desert,
- 2:48which is all the cause of going in.
- 2:50So I am the reason if anyone deserves to go and it's me and
- 2:54even myself. I understood from my words, you
- 2:57could see I understood that I did not deserve and you know
- 3:01what, I was not even granted the right.
- 3:03So I recognize that it's all a gift and I want you to know that
- 3:07for you as well. It's Madnatri Nam.
- 3:09The vinayas are going in. Don't take it for granted.
- 3:12It's all a gift. And what should have been to
- 3:14answer, he says I asked Hashem to at least see.
- 3:18Hashem said you can't go in, but you can see the madash.
- 3:22It's well, no madash. The Musharraf said that I'll go
- 3:27in any form. You don't want me to go in as a
- 3:30leader. I won't go in as a leader.
- 3:32In fact, Musharraf and only really prayed fully after your
- 3:37Schwab menu was chosen while you wait for that moment, because
- 3:41you understood that. I understand you don't want me
- 3:43to be the leader anymore. I got that.
- 3:45But let me go in as a regular person.
- 3:47Let me go on just part of the crew.
- 3:49Madasha was further Mushiya been said let me go in any form any
- 3:52form meant let me even go in. Let me be a bird that flies and
- 3:57sees an animal that can see. I just want to see.
- 3:59I want to be there. I want to live there.
- 4:01Hashem said no, no, why he's telling this to the people he
- 4:04wants me to understand. Don't take what you're about to
- 4:08do for granted and then he said my prayer is can I see the land.
- 4:12Hashem says that yes again the same question Why is that
- 4:17important? Why do we have this thing?
- 4:19The Monticello saw the land, Avajavino also.
- 4:24His original trip was to travel the land and the sea.
- 4:28He didn't live there, He didn't stay there.
- 4:30Again, the same concept. Why I should never definitely
- 4:33did not settle the land as they need to sail.
- 4:36Same concept. What's the need to see?
- 4:39The need to see is a similar idea is to appreciate the beauty
- 4:44of the connection of the gift, to recognize how much is a gift.
- 4:49That's another example of that beauty.
- 4:52I'll give you a third example. Well, Shabeno later on the
- 4:57Prasad a middle of this speech, Pasuk says he establishes the
- 5:05three cities of Mcloth. He establishes the three cities
- 5:10of Mcloth. Then Benesa of course to Jordan
- 5:13and he establishes those cities. Why does he establish those
- 5:15cities? Says about she?
- 5:18Because he wants to do a mitzvah and one second.
- 5:20What's the law? The law is 6 main ear McCloud
- 5:23right 6 total 3 all across Jordan and three in the lane. 3
- 5:29in the lane is nothing to get to The three of course of Jordan
- 5:33are connected to three in the lane.
- 5:35All together there are 6. The way it works is you
- 5:38establish these three, then you have the three in the land.
- 5:44Once a three in the are established, these three go into
- 5:47effect. So Moshe Abano, in a sense was
- 5:51starting something. Starting him.
- 5:52His father would take years for it to be completed away after he
- 5:56passed away. So why is he doing this same
- 5:59idea? He wants to partake somewhat and
- 6:03then it's finally to sail. He can't get in there.
- 6:05He can't even establish Jeremy Cloth over there.
- 6:07So he's established the three over here, which will be
- 6:10connected and which will take effect when he established the
- 6:14three over there. They'll be connected.
- 6:17And again, it's an indication how much he wants to have some
- 6:20relationship, some connection to the land.
- 6:22And he's telling this all to Banana Cell.
- 6:24He's showing this all to Banana Cell so that they don't take it
- 6:26for granted. And why is this so important
- 6:30that Banana Cell learned this lesson, not taking it for
- 6:31granting? Here's the key.
- 6:34I think the key is like this. The nature and the tone of the
- 6:38Jewish people in the desert overall was the tone.
- 6:42If we go negative, always the tone, a tone up complaining.
- 6:48And Michelle Bennu wants to undo that tone.
- 6:52He wants to change that nature and he wanted to say you've been
- 6:55complaining. The essence of complaining is if
- 6:57you go to the core of complaining.
- 6:59I have what I have, but I feel better missing this.
- 7:02I'm upset that I'm missing that I don't really appreciate what I
- 7:05have itself. That's the essence of
- 7:06complaining. When I complain about having
- 7:09cheese but not having locks, what I'm saying is I have cheese
- 7:13that I don't, that I appreciate premise locks.
- 7:17I complain about having dairy, not having meat.
- 7:19I'm saying is I don't really recognize the dairy.
- 7:22I said I missed the meat. I complain about living in
- 7:26Brooklyn, not living in deal. I said I recognize the fact that
- 7:28I live in Brooklyn, but I'm missing deal and vice versa.
- 7:31Same idea. Any complaining in itself, the
- 7:34tone of complaining what it is, is taking for granted what you
- 7:38have and missing out and feeling bad what you don't have.
- 7:41That's the essence of complaining.
- 7:42The core of anyone that complaints, that is exactly what
- 7:45they're doing. Someone complaints about the
- 7:46train, someone complaints about that car ride.
- 7:48What they are doing is they're taking you for granted what
- 7:50exists and they are miss feeling bad for what doesn't exist in
- 7:55their hands right now. Well share.
- 7:57Beno understood. That was the mentality of being
- 7:59yourself. That's been that mentality and
- 8:02that's what got them into their problems.
- 8:04I have to change the mentality for good.
- 8:07And therefore, he gives his speech and it lays out to them
- 8:10how much, how many times he has prayed to go in.
- 8:12What's he telling them? Whatever you're about to do,
- 8:16don't take for granted anymore. Going forward, get this tone out
- 8:20of your system. If you're going into a land,
- 8:22it's all a gift. You're going to live there for
- 8:24years. Everything that you have there,
- 8:26cherish because it's all not really meant to stay.
- 8:30And it's all brand new. And I think for us today, we're
- 8:34back. Many of us are in the
- 8:36complaining mode. We have a nature to always look
- 8:39at what's missing. I always feel what's not here.
- 8:43That is our nature. We're inclined that way because
- 8:45of what we see. We're inclined that way because
- 8:47of what other people have and we don't have.
- 8:50And that mindset creates this constant sort of sadness.
- 8:55While things are great, which is the biggest shame.
- 8:58We have a great life. We give a blessed life, but a
- 9:01certain tone of you wake up in the morning, you're wondering
- 9:03like what's missing or what's going to happen and what's you
- 9:05know, the void and that that that wiring is based on this
- 9:10sort of complaining structure. Again, taking it for granted.
- 9:13We have and only seeing we don't have that is the wiring that
- 9:16people live with today and what should have been and wanted to
- 9:19get this out of Banaya solar system because that led to the
- 9:22challenge in the desert and he wants to lead to blessing and
- 9:27some ha in the land. It's time to change this wiring
- 9:31and the way to change that wiring is recognize and
- 9:34appreciate what you have and stop there.
- 9:37Stop only looking at what's missing and therefore having
- 9:41both flaws, not appreciating and being sad for what's missing.
- 9:45Do the opposite. Recognize what you have and you
- 9:47have neither challenge. You don't really notice what's
- 9:49missing and you do appreciate what you have.
- 9:52That is a different wiring entirely and it's a whole
- 9:55different outcome. Instead of sadness and this sort
- 9:57of feeling of I'm looking to that the other thing, and I
- 10:00don't really feel settled. Look at what you have.
- 10:03Look inward and there's a degree of Saha that comes from the same
- 10:07life. There's a different mindset.
- 10:09That's what you have been on. His goal.
- 10:11It's a basic concept. My Chevy understood it could
- 10:14change the shape of the Jewish people.
- 10:16I LED them in the desert. I did all that, but they closed
- 10:20with the mindset of wiring. I'm complaining.
- 10:22It's time to shift gears and it's time to come with different
- 10:26outcomes because he knew if they continue, that same mindset,
- 10:29same flaws will continue. That's how it works when a
- 10:33person's a complainer, they run into the same bumps.
- 10:36Mushevana says these words, He says these words.
- 10:40He says, you know, set it on the land.
- 11:00When you have children and grandchildren, we know Chantem
- 11:05bought it. No, Chantem means settle really
- 11:09deeply. Settle on the land, reach Khatem
- 11:12and then we're going to go astray.
- 11:14Vazi 10 peso to not call. You can start doing things you
- 11:18do bad when you know Chantem, when you settle.
- 11:23Haidoth Ibrahim, I'm testifying to you today that things will go
- 11:28bad, it will be punishment, et cetera.
- 11:30Once we settle lo terehunya MI Malaya, we will not be able to
- 11:33remain on the land. Christian will destroy us.
- 11:36And then he says these words. Please listen, all right?
- 11:41And he says musha Marta ET rukar VED mitzvotava sharnohim.
- 11:50Instead, listen to these laws that'll be good for your
- 11:55children and grandchildren. You want to remain on the land
- 12:05Hashem gives you all the days. What are these words?
- 12:08All the days Hashem gives you the land.
- 12:10What are the meaning of the words?
- 12:11All of this has to clean our car.
- 12:15All the days means every single day on that land as a gift
- 12:20Hashem is giving with you today and then tomorrow Hashem gave it
- 12:23to you. Ayom, each day is a new gift,
- 12:26each day is a new existence. And if you want to have a
- 12:29different outcome and the outcome of Venora Shantem, you
- 12:33want to have a different outcome, the outcome of settling
- 12:35and therefore complaining and therefore problems.
- 12:38See each as a gift, see each moment as a gift, and see each
- 12:42part of our life as a special, unique gift.
- 12:46And that's really the wiring that has to change in order to
- 12:49have some high life. It's nothing more than
- 12:52understanding. I look inward.
- 12:54I appreciate I don't take it for granted.
- 12:57Instead of only looking to over there.
- 12:59And now I recognize that it's here.
- 13:01I lived over here and I recognize I should have been
- 13:04understood. I have to change the wiring.
- 13:07Let me show up in yourself how much I'm dying to live there and
- 13:10like I'm being held back. And then they can appreciate the
- 13:13call. I mean, which means a regular
- 13:15Jew during that time was granted a greater gift than
- 13:18Mashhadapeno. And to him now is meant to show
- 13:21them your life is completely and totally a chemist.
- 13:25I think this is very important for all of us to appreciate.
- 13:28Now. Step one is for ourselves.
- 13:30Well, we wake up every morning and you sell more than any.
- 13:32It's exactly as the opening. It has to change.
- 13:35How to change our worry in our mindset.
- 13:37We have a nature, for whatever reason, to see what's missing.
- 13:42To want that and to feel like I wish I had that just the way we
- 13:45are. It can go to I want the next
- 13:47season or can go I want the next car, I want the next home, or I
- 13:52want my children to be better than they are.
- 13:54All these things are all the same unhealthy wire and the same
- 13:58thing. It's not coming from a good
- 13:59place. If someone wants to raise their
- 14:00children better like I would, but someone disappointed in
- 14:03their children, often times it comes in this thing, this sort
- 14:06of unhappy, unsettled with what we had, the most important thing
- 14:10we can have. It changed every element of our
- 14:12life. It gives you more patience for
- 14:14your children. It gives you a great
- 14:16appreciation for your job, for your family, for your home, for
- 14:22your situation, whatever you're dealing with.
- 14:25It gives you all of that, the much more settled mindset when
- 14:28you stop and you're looking where I'll give you an example.
- 14:31I'm close to this. So this past Wednesday, for
- 14:34whatever reason, I don't know why this happens once in a
- 14:37while, but I had I, I, when I went to bed, I reflected on my
- 14:40day. I can't believe how many
- 14:42accountants I had. I would drive at home this
- 14:45lesson, I'll give you like 6 of them.
- 14:48First of all, all the times in the morning, I learned with
- 14:52individual and we get more details than this.
- 14:54I learned with an individual who faced one of the greatest
- 14:57challenges this past year, OK with his family.
- 15:00That's the starters, that's the open.
- 15:03Then what was the second thing? The second thing was after that,
- 15:11I'm sitting there learning a Lakewood and a friend of mine
- 15:14shows up and ties me on the shoulder.
- 15:16Who is this guy? It's old trouble down mine, he
- 15:20says. You know, I'm really
- 15:21overwhelmed. I'm really tired now.
- 15:22I said why, what's going on? I had known the story, just
- 15:25didn't know how overwhelming it was.
- 15:27I had a baby about six weeks ago and the baby was born with a
- 15:32heart defect. Mentally, the baby's fine.
- 15:35Born with a heart defect, baby was born, had to be born in CHOP
- 15:39'cause they knew before I had to be born in Philadelphia.
- 15:41And what does that mean? That means the baby was born a
- 15:44week in a week or so after being born, remaining in CHOP.
- 15:48I had to do an open heart surgery on the baby and then had
- 15:52stay for recovery. It's six weeks.
- 15:55How's he the baby still there? Eventually the hope is to bring
- 15:58home and then I have to go back for another one and then go back
- 16:02for another surgery. And there's multiple surgery
- 16:04babies to go through for the first year in order to get to
- 16:06Norm. It's a regular guy, a wonderful
- 16:08guy. He's my friend for a long time.
- 16:11And he's now, he's lives in Lakewood.
- 16:12He has to travel now. He, his wife and his
- 16:15mother-in-law, they take a day and travel and spend a day and
- 16:18travel. This is his day.
- 16:19OK, I'm looking at this guy normally bears the money and we
- 16:22can relax, chill, take it easy, which we normally do every
- 16:25summer for him. He has no banners in money.
- 16:28But there's no life. This is life.
- 16:30OK, fine. That was actually medicine
- 16:31number one. Then another thing happened and
- 16:36I'm telling you I don't want to go depress us, but it was just a
- 16:40thingy of the thing of thing. The other thing was you told me
- 16:42about the story with the with the girl and what happened on
- 16:46the Shabba, right. We heard that story fine.
- 16:50The girl as he thought of aneurysm.
- 16:51She's going to be better community girl on the Shabba.
- 16:55And like I'm just hearing you think of the thing I'm saying to
- 16:57the show. I guess it's pretty safe.
- 16:58And then I, I come here and after the night learning and
- 17:02then whatever and had a conversation with few
- 17:04individuals, different people talking about jobs.
- 17:08And I had a counter with three people about their jobs.
- 17:12We're not sure exactly where their business is going to go.
- 17:15And I try they can make ends meet.
- 17:16Three people over the coast of the night.
- 17:19Then I go to visit my mother. OK, that's one point of night.
- 17:25And she does what you hear. I said where you hear what I
- 17:28heard So and so heard with the fire.
- 17:31So we're talking about Charles. We had a person in the community
- 17:34and we know very well where the fire in the home on Shabbat
- 17:38before the Shabbat. You're shocked.
- 17:41And to me, I right away I got you in low marriage and to me, I
- 17:47got into my car and this really changed my whole mindset.
- 17:51I called the person, I had a conversation with him and his
- 17:53wife in the car. And have you heard their tone?
- 17:57It was everything. The tone was everything you wish
- 18:01the person could think, which means I think with the Hashem
- 18:06that we're all good, we're alive, it's only our own.
- 18:10That doesn't matter. We're thankful for this, we're
- 18:12thankful for that. We're thankful for timing.
- 18:14We're thankful who someone was able to wake us up.
- 18:16We're thinking about everything and they're just going on and
- 18:19on. And I'm listening to that.
- 18:20I'm saying to myself that mindset is literally this
- 18:23mindset as we all wish to have the head, which is the most
- 18:26healthy, clear head, and we never want to have any
- 18:30challenge. Absolutely not.
- 18:31But the mindset is something that a person needs to adapt,
- 18:35appreciative, happy, besimah, thankful, gratitude and not
- 18:41taking this granted. And yes, it sounds so basic and
- 18:44yes, we try to drive it home, but should I have been
- 18:47understood? The only way I could show Benet
- 18:49So the truth is when they witness a man who's the leader
- 18:53of the people, who if anyone deserves to go and he deserves
- 18:56to go in, who begged, pleaded, came up with creative ideas to
- 19:00Hashem to try to figure ways to get in and still couldn't get in
- 19:03so that they see for them it's all Magna chinam.
- 19:06We have to go to look at our own lives and say everything that we
- 19:09have is a gift. It's all a gift.
- 19:12Our family, our children, our health, our home, our job, our
- 19:16community, our health. It's all a gift.
- 19:20It's not really deserved. It doesn't take away from who we
- 19:22are, but just takes away from our current or our natural
- 19:25mindset. For some odd reason, the natural
- 19:27brain looks outward, but the real brain, the successful,
- 19:32productive, happy brain could look inward.
- 19:35And sometimes you have to look at other people and see what
- 19:37they're going through. But your child, they're all
- 19:39going to get out of their problems.
- 19:40All of them can get out of it and they're always at the ship.
- 19:42When you look at them and you look at them the right way, you
- 19:45understand and recognize that all we have is a gift and it
- 19:49changes our mindset and it changes our approach to life.
- 19:51So I'm going to show them on it says shift beneath the mid barn.
- 19:55They had 40 years, but at a very rough tone.
- 19:57The next history, we want to change the tone.
- 20:00And I told it to be a ton of happiness.
- 20:02That's what stops.