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Just Jennie: HOW to Stop Chasing that "25th Hour" · I Choose Me with Jennie Garth

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Hello,
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: as promised, I am back and I'm so happy to
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: be here with you today. We are going to talk
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: about choosing to find me time. On the last episode,
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: I ranted a little about life, about running on fumes
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: and carrying all that heavyweight. There's the forever epic responsibility
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: of being a good mom or dad through every stage
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: and every age. Or maybe you're a parent to an
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: adult kid who still needs a lot of let's just
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: call it guidance, and we're trying to figure out how
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: to do this. You know, we're trying to stay connected
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: with our adult kids as they're leaving the nest, but
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: also knowing, you know, we gotta let them fly. So yeah, yeah,
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: figuring out that whole new rhythm, that whole vibe take
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: some work. Perhaps you're all the sudden facing having to
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: be a completely different kind of parent, like me to
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: an eighty three year old who used to be my parent,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: kind of thing which requires a great amount of love, yes,
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: but also patience, so much patience, like all the patients sometimes,
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: but you know in your bones that's what you need
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: to be doing. Oh and then there's the relationships. They
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: are work. A commitment to grow alongside with your person,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: whether you are together or apart, is a lot of work.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: You have to give that time or it will just
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: fizzle and you will grow apart, and we don't want
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: that to happen. Or maybe it's just all the hoops,
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: all the hoops that you've been jumping through trying to
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: hustle your schedule so that you can do all the things.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: But it got me to the root of the point.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: There isn't and never will be a twenty fifth hour.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: That's the deal. So how do we actually make time
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  Speaker 1: for ourselves within our currently existing twenty four hours? First
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: things first, it starts with choosing to get just as
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: serious about caring for yourself as you are about any
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: other thing in your life. That's it. But here are
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: some of the ways I protect my me time. Okay,
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: Number one, schedule yourself in I've said this so many times. Literally,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: you have to block out time on your calendar the
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: way you would for a major meeting, doctor's appointment, an
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: important you know, thing with your kid. Write it down.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: I write down JG time or ME time. Do not
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: disturb in big bold capital letters. It feels so silly
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: when I started it, but I felt like it forced
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: me to treat my self care as a non negotiable commitment.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: If you see a blank hour in your day, what's
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: the first thing you're going to think about? Putting there
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: a chore? Right, Let's just stop that. Let's don't do that. Okay,
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Let's write in to that blank space, walk with no destination,
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: or thirty minutes to read a book before anything else
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: can nab it. It's a boundary with yourself and it works.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Number two is to protect your mornings. You don't have
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: to carve out an hour. Claim ten minutes that's so easy.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Ten minutes when you first wake up, before you look
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: at your phone. That's very important, very hard to do,
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: but very important, before you check your emails, before you
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: address the human standing in the kitchen asking for a snack,
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: just say no, nope. These ten minutes are mine. No noise,
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: no scrolling, just me sitting peacefully in that quiet, protected
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  Speaker 1: space that is within me, and that is where everything changes.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: My entire perspective for the day. Just that ten minutes
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: for me. At the end of the day, it's my gardening.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: I love ending my workdays in nature. I usually try
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: to stretch the time, and I will hide out in
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: my little rose garden until past dark and then people
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: will come looking for me. But it's really my escape.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: So find your rose garden. I don't know, maybe you're
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: starting to feel a shift just by listening to this.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: You're starting to get a little motivated. But these things,
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: they are going to change your game. Okay, So next
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: I want to get into the powerful act of saying
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  Speaker 1: no and redefining productivity. Okay, so say no like it's
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: a form of self care, because guess what it is.
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  Speaker 1: Every no you say is a non essential request, creating
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  Speaker 1: space for a yes that actually serves you and your
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: well being. Say no is not selfish. It is preventative
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  Speaker 1: medicine for burnout. You don't need a huge explanation when
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: you're saying no to somebody. Just keep it simple. Try this.
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  Speaker 1: That sounds really great, but I'm protecting my time right now.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: I hope you can understand fair simple right or you
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  Speaker 1: can say ah, I can't take that on right now.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: But thank you so much for thinking of me. Very short,
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: very sweet, and you know what, final, So people really
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  Speaker 1: get your message.
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: If you've been ghosted, divorced, or left for someone else.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: Snap out of it. It's time for you to give
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: some help by listening to us that I Do Part two.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: Listen to I Do Part two on the iHeartRadio app,
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: At the core of this is something simple but so powerful,
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: the ability to choose yourself. That means tuning into your
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: own needs and building the kind of inner strength that
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: doesn't require validation from an outside source. It's about finding
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: stability within yourself so that no matter what life throws
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: at you, whether it's chaos or change or conflict, you
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: know you have your own back. I do just want
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: to clarify one thing for anyone out there who might
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  Speaker 1: be having trouble with choose yourself. The concept when I
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: say I choose me, I am not talking about being selfish.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: It's not about being self absorbed or ignoring other people's needs.
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  Speaker 1: That's not the message at all. What I mean is
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  Speaker 1: that we really need to fill our own cup first
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  Speaker 1: so we have something to offer the people we love.
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  Speaker 1: When you are grounded in who you are, when you're
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: taking care of your physical, emotional, mental needs, you can
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  Speaker 1: actually show up better for everybody else in your life,
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: and that leads to number four. Redefine productivity. This is
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: a tough one for me. We think productivity means doing
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: folding the laundry, cleaning the floor, sending the emails, the scheduling,
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: the doctor's appointments, the pickups, the drop offs. But here's
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: the game changing truth. Rest is not lazy. It's your
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  Speaker 1: maintenance for your soul. You cannot pour from an empty cup.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: You've hurt that a million times, but it's so true.
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  Speaker 1: If your self care time is on your calendar and
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  Speaker 1: you follow through, that is one of the most important
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: and productive things you will do all week. Number five,
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  Speaker 1: check your why before you're yes. So before agreeing to anything, pause,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: ask yourself, why am I saying yes to this? Is
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: it out of joy or obligation? Always take a beat
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  Speaker 1: before saying yes and determine if it's really right for you.
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  Speaker 1: And finally, this is the simple one. Do what you
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  Speaker 1: say you're gonna do in life and then just do
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  Speaker 1: your best. That's it. Give yourself permission to let good
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  Speaker 1: enough be enough. So let's bring it back. You don't
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  Speaker 1: need a mythical twenty fifth hour. You don't need a
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  Speaker 1: genie in a bottle. You just need to decide that
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  Speaker 1: you are worth one of the twenty four hours you
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: already have. The real I Choose me moment here is
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: not finding the time, but claiming the worthiness to use
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: the time. It's accepting that your rest, your peace, and
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  Speaker 1: your joy are just as important as the hardest deadline
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: or the most urgent RSVP. They are the foundation of
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: everything else you do. My challenge to you this week
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: don't get scared. I just want you to be open. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: So let's do this. Let's open up our calendars, maybe
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  Speaker 1: your phone. Maybe you have one of those og spiral
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: date book, daily planner things. God bless you, open it
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: up right now, and I want you to block out
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: two thirty minute time slots, not for a chore, not
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: for an errand for me time. Maybe maybe it's just
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: sitting under a tree and doing nothing and that's good enough.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's putting on your favorite music and having an
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: impromptu dance party in the kitchen. I love doing that.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Here's the thing. Don't let that wave of responsibility that
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: might pop up in the middle of this me time,
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  Speaker 1: don't let it wash it away. Don't allow your own
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  Speaker 1: mind to suck up your precious thirty minutes and the
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  Speaker 1: last part of this challenge, tell me what are you
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: putting in your thirty minute me time space this week?
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: I want to know, so just take a second to
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: follow us on I Choose Me with Jenny Garth on
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: Instagram and let me know. I want to know. Thank
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: you for choosing me. Bye for now, Love you guys.