Latest / Vanity Farah with Chris Farah / 90 Day Fiancé Season 12 Episode 11 Meeting the Family My Part 1

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90 Day Fiancé Season 12 Episode 11 Meeting the Family My Part 1 · Vanity Farah with Chris Farah

0:07
Speaker 1: Hey babes, Welcome back to Vanity Farraware. Today. My name
0:10
Speaker 1: is Chris, and I will be talking about ninety Day Fiance,
0:12
Speaker 1: Season twelve, Episode eleven, Meeting the Family. I loved this episode. Wow,
0:19
Speaker 1: what a treat. So many pictures I have. This will
0:21
Speaker 1: be a long episode. I'm sure part two coming your
0:23
Speaker 1: way up because I have so much to talk about.
0:26
Speaker 1: I mean, my goodness, gracious woo honey. Now, it's hard
0:31
Speaker 1: to deal with what we know in real life because
0:34
Speaker 1: we exist in the universe and we've been hearing some
0:38
Speaker 1: things off the streets. So to watch it now certainly
0:44
Speaker 1: feels like, well, I think, I know, I can't get
0:46
Speaker 1: my hopes up about certain things, so I don't want
0:49
Speaker 1: to spoil it for you. But at the same time,
0:51
Speaker 1: we're all in the same universe, you know, So if
0:53
Speaker 1: it's like if we were best friends in real life
0:56
Speaker 1: or just like at least acquaintances and we had found
0:59
Speaker 1: that we will watched this episode and I learned what
1:02
Speaker 1: I did from, you know, my natural tendencies on the
1:05
Speaker 1: Internet and whatnot. I would say in conversation with you
1:10
Speaker 1: unless you were like, don't tell me anything, and then
1:13
Speaker 1: I'd be like, well and I would if you told
1:15
Speaker 1: me that, I'd be like, oh god, other, you're not fun.
1:18
Speaker 1: He want why you want to be like in some
1:21
Speaker 1: sort of weird ignorance that the producers have for you.
1:25
Speaker 1: I mean, come on, you know it's it's not real.
1:26
Speaker 1: It's not real life, and that's what the show should be.
1:29
Speaker 1: It's it's real. It's a dog you series. It's not
1:33
Speaker 1: like a love competition show. They're not on some island, unless,
1:36
Speaker 1: of course, it's a Hunt for Love, in which case
1:39
Speaker 1: they are on an island like that, or of course
1:42
Speaker 1: Love and Paradise if they ever bring that show back around.
1:45
Speaker 1: Ah so, babes, let's talk Marissa and Edward. Now he
1:54
Speaker 1: comes out and he looks supers cute in like a beige,
1:57
Speaker 1: monochromatic outfit, and she's like, no, no, go back, And
2:02
Speaker 1: I don't like this look. It's too one thing. I'm
2:06
Speaker 1: gonna be wearing one thing, and I want you to
2:08
Speaker 1: match me, even though we're both marrying, wearing primary colors
2:12
Speaker 1: that are neutral and still go together. But whatever gubblishes
2:15
Speaker 1: one spy versus spy. She's like, go put black pants
2:19
Speaker 1: on and also take off those bracelets, those ethnic bracelets.
2:24
Speaker 1: No we're gonna you're gonna be amongst wealth advisors whatever.
2:29
Speaker 1: I mean, She's just so sometimes I'm like, let the
2:31
Speaker 1: man just be him, Like, how about you don't control
2:34
Speaker 1: what he wears. You would hate if someone did that
2:38
Speaker 1: to you, and he looks fine, like you know, like
2:42
Speaker 1: obviously if you're with someone and you're trying to wear
2:44
Speaker 1: something absolutely crazy darcy or something where it's just like,
2:48
Speaker 1: you know, can can that titty go inside? Or can
2:49
Speaker 1: you not wear flip flops at my father's retirement party?
2:53
Speaker 1: Who knows, I'm not quite sure. I'm just saying, of
2:55
Speaker 1: course you'd be like no. But he looked totally normal,
2:58
Speaker 1: totally fine, and she just is imposing so much of
3:02
Speaker 1: her unnecessary will on him. Lipstick on my teeth, I
3:10
Speaker 1: saw it, Okay. So anyway, he tries to make some
3:16
Speaker 1: joke how like you know, like she's blonde and he's
3:19
Speaker 1: like black or whatever that joke I mean, you know
3:22
Speaker 1: whatever he however, he was saying it like a wordplay,
3:25
Speaker 1: and she wanted to know part of it. She's like,
3:27
Speaker 1: whatever you say. The cameras right there. So anyways, she's
3:33
Speaker 1: late to her cocktail party. That's being well, not her,
3:36
Speaker 1: it's her friend's cocktail party being thrown, and she's like,
3:39
Speaker 1: why am I always late? It's like, say, underestimate the
3:43
Speaker 1: steps and time getting ready. Here's the thing, Yeah, me too,
3:48
Speaker 1: almost inevitably, not just that I underestimate how long like
3:54
Speaker 1: parking will take or how long will take me to
3:56
Speaker 1: find the place or like where it is, and like,
3:59
Speaker 1: you know, like traffic, multiple outfits or steaming something. I like,
4:10
Speaker 1: you know, like the actually put an outfit together from
4:13
Speaker 1: scratch like takes a long time. And I mean that
4:17
Speaker 1: in the way you're supposed to considerately put like an
4:20
Speaker 1: outgoing outfit together, like and I'm saying, like, is there
4:23
Speaker 1: an outer layer? Is there? Accessories? Is are you changing
4:27
Speaker 1: your bag if you're you know, like if you have
4:29
Speaker 1: a bag on you like, are you putting different jewelry on?
4:33
Speaker 1: Like all of that, like to consider it and triumph
4:36
Speaker 1: it takes so much time, but you are me, me, mursa,
4:40
Speaker 1: both of us we're like not forty five minutes, but
4:45
Speaker 1: it's two hours if not, you know, God bless. And
4:51
Speaker 1: that's like freshly showered hair already like blown dry. Okay,
4:56
Speaker 1: So anyways, she then is like, don't get sloppy drunk,
5:04
Speaker 1: although I got admit, I've never seen you that way.
5:07
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, then don't tell him that. Don't get
5:10
Speaker 1: possessed by an evil demon. I mean, you know, like
5:13
Speaker 1: you haven't seen it. So, I mean he's a grown
5:16
Speaker 1: ass man. Why would you think he would he? Okay,
5:21
Speaker 1: So anyway, She's just then like I just feel like
5:23
Speaker 1: it's so everything is so rude. And she picks up
5:25
Speaker 1: in the fact that she's rude. But we'll get into
5:27
Speaker 1: why she makes it a him problem. Okay, good bless.
5:29
Speaker 1: So then she's like, this is a normal party. So
5:33
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like this is a normal party,
5:35
Speaker 1: Like it's not just for you, Like it's not like
5:37
Speaker 1: a welcome to the world party like Edward, you know,
5:39
Speaker 1: like it's for everyone here, including me, and you know,
5:43
Speaker 1: all of us including me. Don't want you to talk
5:46
Speaker 1: about baseball all the time and talk about them. Okay,
5:50
Speaker 1: A couple of interesting things. It makes me feel like
5:53
Speaker 1: she thinks that he doesn't know how to talk to
5:55
Speaker 1: people when he worked in a hospitality environment. Second thing is,
6:03
Speaker 1: even if you don't like baseball, odds are a couple
6:07
Speaker 1: of those dudes there love baseball? I mean, odds are
6:11
Speaker 1: you know I'm saying, like that's a sport like that
6:17
Speaker 1: is a huge arm in a conversation or tentacle to
6:20
Speaker 1: be used, you know, like I'm trying to think of,
6:23
Speaker 1: you know what, Okay, here's I was thinking about this
6:25
Speaker 1: the other day. Things to talk about in conversation that
6:30
Speaker 1: isn't you know, you know, awkward choices or can be
6:34
Speaker 1: awkward choices, And that's like, okay, so awkward choices or
6:37
Speaker 1: you know what could be historically is like religion, politics, money, Okay,
6:41
Speaker 1: so God bless to take those off the table. And
6:44
Speaker 1: then it's like, what are the things you can talk
6:47
Speaker 1: about that will bridge people together? Sports is like a
6:54
Speaker 1: huge one because if it's a whole for well, like
7:00
Speaker 1: people follow the sport, people like no keep I'm sure
7:03
Speaker 1: knows what's happening in American you know, like East Coast
7:09
Speaker 1: baseball teams like Yankees and Mets like those are big
7:12
Speaker 1: ass conversation people, I'm sorry, conversation starters for people like that.
7:17
Speaker 1: And by people like that, I mean men like if
7:20
Speaker 1: you're in LA and you can talk about Lakers or Dodgers, good,
7:23
Speaker 1: you know, if you want to, like, you know, just
7:24
Speaker 1: mingle amongst other people, especially if you're a dude, I'm
7:27
Speaker 1: just being honest. I mean, here's another one. I'm just
7:29
Speaker 1: gonna say, pop culture. You know, like if you're just
7:32
Speaker 1: like somewhat adversed and or you know, if someone if
7:35
Speaker 1: you're like up to date in pop culture, like you
7:37
Speaker 1: know what movies are big deals and you've gone to
7:40
Speaker 1: see them, like you know, like this is boring, but
7:43
Speaker 1: if you can bring up conversation about obsession or I
7:46
Speaker 1: don't know, some like the Disclosure Day, you know, or yeah,
7:53
Speaker 1: do you listen to the new Madonna album? What songs
7:57
Speaker 1: do you like right now? I were like Madison Beer's
7:59
Speaker 1: fifteen Minutes, I do Slater's Dance, I do you know?
8:05
Speaker 1: It's like oh, okay, Well, like I mean, I don't
8:07
Speaker 1: know about it. For every demographic of person, those are
8:09
Speaker 1: the answers. But you know, I mean insert your own
8:13
Speaker 1: like oh did you see those so and so's playing
8:15
Speaker 1: the so and so in town? You know, it's like
8:17
Speaker 1: all of that pop culture, music, entertainment, sports, those are
8:20
Speaker 1: huge things. So I'm like, why are you telling this
8:22
Speaker 1: man not to talk about baseball? Thing that he knows
8:24
Speaker 1: a lot about. That's a lot for me to talk about.
8:27
Speaker 1: But just like everything about her and all her notes
8:30
Speaker 1: to him are intense. It's like, I wish that you
8:32
Speaker 1: would put all these notes into you getting better people
8:35
Speaker 1: to help around the house in situations where you have
8:39
Speaker 1: to have a professional do it and then not, you know,
8:42
Speaker 1: it's like, put that energy into getting those people to
8:45
Speaker 1: do that and also get better serveware. Let's talk about
8:48
Speaker 1: the surveware. So she, by the way, is wearing a
8:50
Speaker 1: very sexy black dress, and I do get that she
8:52
Speaker 1: looks great. The house that we go to for her
8:55
Speaker 1: friend's cocktail party is massive, huge, huge, very traditional gorgeous.
9:00
Speaker 1: We walk in. Some of the very b shots we
9:02
Speaker 1: get are things either catered or she had the person
9:06
Speaker 1: that owns this house, which are sterling silver food warmers
9:11
Speaker 1: and buffet like, you know, just fancy ass service wear,
9:16
Speaker 1: which I'm like, Marisa, you need this. This is the
9:20
Speaker 1: exact thing you need so when your friends and family
9:23
Speaker 1: come over, you serve them hot baked city that you
9:28
Speaker 1: removed from that tinfoil situation. You're just pretending that you cooked,
9:33
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Anyway, but we do are
9:35
Speaker 1: going to get more about her cooking coming up. So
9:42
Speaker 1: they seem to separate very early on, which you know,
9:45
Speaker 1: is the course of this party. And he's being inundated
9:47
Speaker 1: by this blonde moment in this coral dress and like
9:50
Speaker 1: her husband and like various other people, and they're asking
9:52
Speaker 1: him questions like do you like Meerica? And he's like yeah,
9:57
Speaker 1: of course. Can you imagine him being like, no, bitch,
10:00
Speaker 1: you women, that's what you have here anyway? No, But
10:04
Speaker 1: he's like yeah. And then they're like do you cook?
10:08
Speaker 1: Does she cook? Who cooks in your household? You know? Anyway?
10:11
Speaker 1: And he's like, well, she does. And at first I
10:14
Speaker 1: was scared because I thought blondes don't cook. And when
10:17
Speaker 1: he says that, the men at the party love him
10:22
Speaker 1: because one of the other tentacles and conversations amongst men
10:26
Speaker 1: is misogyny. He sports misogyny cars. It's like kind of
10:38
Speaker 1: me watches, I don't know what do you think? Anyway? Okay,
10:45
Speaker 1: So the blonde woman that he's talking to is like, aha,
10:50
Speaker 1: you got me there, you know, ha ha. And then
10:53
Speaker 1: some other guy off camera is like, so, uh, what
10:59
Speaker 1: would you do here, Edwin? Talking about of course, what
11:04
Speaker 1: Edward would just do career wise, I guess in America
11:10
Speaker 1: and just a couple of things. Edwin is such a
11:12
Speaker 1: funny name. Not funny name. If you if your name Edwin.
11:16
Speaker 1: I'm not saying your name is funny in itself. It's
11:18
Speaker 1: just like that Edward was changed to Edwin. Oh what
11:22
Speaker 1: would you do with Dwin? Hey? Edwin? Would you do?
11:30
Speaker 1: I want to know what your plans are in America?
11:33
Speaker 1: Name freedom? Are you going to try and work on
11:36
Speaker 1: the mechanic? What are you gonna do? Edwin? Edwin? I
11:41
Speaker 1: mean Edwin just sounds so uk like these are my sons,
11:46
Speaker 1: Charles and Edwin, Charles Edwin Curtsey for the people I
11:52
Speaker 1: don't know, just made laugh. Okay, So God was like, okay,
11:57
Speaker 1: everything about this party? These people like please, I can't like,
12:03
Speaker 1: I don't know, like none of this is fun. Like
12:05
Speaker 1: she's overdressed for this party a hund do percent in
12:08
Speaker 1: like Pennsylvania. I realize she's stressed, like if she's gonna
12:12
Speaker 1: go out to New York, I guess, or like you know,
12:15
Speaker 1: like Vegas, Like this is like too sexy of a dress?
12:18
Speaker 1: What looks like this backyard? Nice cocktail party? For sure? Nice?
12:22
Speaker 1: It's just that you know, it's there's here's what I say.
12:26
Speaker 1: There's no need for you to be that sexy for
12:29
Speaker 1: this environment with all of these like couples, you can
12:34
Speaker 1: be like there's a little more chill, a little more comfortable,
12:36
Speaker 1: Like there's a part of her that really wants to
12:39
Speaker 1: project and very much cares what other people think. Also,
12:44
Speaker 1: she is so obsessed with like what the people I
12:48
Speaker 1: do and hang out with, what they talk about and
12:51
Speaker 1: what they're interested in. And it's like, all right, you're
12:55
Speaker 1: you know you're. But your stepdad worked in bridal stuff
12:58
Speaker 1: like started David's Bride. Then he worked there as a
13:01
Speaker 1: CEO NEPO like Bridal Baby, and then like okay, which
13:09
Speaker 1: was great. You know, God bless we all. You know,
13:11
Speaker 1: it's a nice inn. I'm just saying it's a nice
13:12
Speaker 1: in I'm happy for you. And then you know, you
13:14
Speaker 1: worked God bless I client fields for like what seems
13:16
Speaker 1: like two seconds. God bless. But then at the same time,
13:21
Speaker 1: I'm I'm confused, why, like you being like a bar
13:24
Speaker 1: method basic instructor is making you so far beyond and
13:31
Speaker 1: Edwin just getting Edward's life conversation topics ability to understand,
13:39
Speaker 1: I wonder, and this is what I mean, like how
13:43
Speaker 1: much did they talk on the phone? She doesn't she
13:47
Speaker 1: She in her like early episode, she was like I
13:50
Speaker 1: met him and then we talked a lot, like you know,
13:53
Speaker 1: I came back a bunch and then we just you know,
13:57
Speaker 1: stopped talking. We're out of touch. And then I rano
14:00
Speaker 1: went traveling again and randomly texted him, and then we
14:02
Speaker 1: started talking again. And I guess I want to know,
14:06
Speaker 1: were they the kind of couple that talked on the
14:10
Speaker 1: phone or facetimed multiple times a day and or at
14:12
Speaker 1: night for like an hour or something like that. And
14:14
Speaker 1: the reason why is what are you talking about in
14:19
Speaker 1: those phone conversations? Are you just like superficially talking back
14:29
Speaker 1: and forth or just talking about how hot you guys
14:32
Speaker 1: are you think you guys are to each other, or
14:34
Speaker 1: reminiscing about sex times in the past, or I guess
14:38
Speaker 1: planning your sex CapAids in the future. Like was there
14:42
Speaker 1: no intellectual stimulation or just like connection that happened over
14:47
Speaker 1: I don't know values that you guys have or I
14:50
Speaker 1: already mentioned conversation topics. We definitely know it wasn't baseball. Spiritually,
14:54
Speaker 1: like you know, I don't know spirituality, values, family, I
15:02
Speaker 1: don't know. Did you guys just not talk on the
15:05
Speaker 1: phone that much or was it just not deep? Because
15:08
Speaker 1: I want to say, like, this whole next part is
15:12
Speaker 1: about her saying that she intellectually needs something that he's
15:18
Speaker 1: not providing, and I want to know what that looks like,
15:31
Speaker 1: because I can't imagine that she needs to like I can't.
15:34
Speaker 1: It seems like through her ex husband. Also, she has
15:37
Speaker 1: like a certain type and they're not like rocket scientists anyway,
15:47
Speaker 1: God bless you know her. One of her friends is
15:49
Speaker 1: her wealth manager, and one of her friends is like
15:50
Speaker 1: an insurance guy, you know, And definitely Edward's like, oh,
15:54
Speaker 1: these are people that I would be serving in the
15:56
Speaker 1: dr And he's talking about hitting baseball. Something's in a cage,
16:03
Speaker 1: and then she walks up and he's talking about it.
16:04
Speaker 1: We think where she's gonna get really upset, but she's
16:06
Speaker 1: like whatever about it. She has her girl time where
16:11
Speaker 1: she really lets loose, and this is where she says
16:13
Speaker 1: a whole bunch of things like that he is just
16:18
Speaker 1: not culturally experienced, and she wonders if, and often has
16:24
Speaker 1: been thinking that she's made a mistake, if she'll ever
16:27
Speaker 1: be satisfied with his intellectual capability to like stimulate her
16:31
Speaker 1: and be with her, you know, She's like, I wonder
16:39
Speaker 1: if I'm just going to regret all this. I mean
16:45
Speaker 1: to him all the time, and her friends are like,
16:48
Speaker 1: oh my god, stop being mean to yourself, girl, No,
16:51
Speaker 1: and then she's just like, you, guys, right, I am
16:53
Speaker 1: being so mean to myself. I'm being mean to myself,
16:56
Speaker 1: but I'm being mean to him, And so why am
16:58
Speaker 1: I so mean to him? And me? Why am I mean? Me? Nas?
17:01
Speaker 1: And stopping me? Nas me? Okay? It's crazy, crazy, crazy crazy,
17:09
Speaker 1: Like there's a bunch of betties around her looking at her,
17:11
Speaker 1: and they're just like, yeah, that's you know, like you
17:13
Speaker 1: really are so different, Like I've never seen you like this,
17:16
Speaker 1: like literally like you're you're you look slutty, you know,
17:19
Speaker 1: like why do you what do you want? You know?
17:22
Speaker 1: Like she's I don't know. It's just so interesting. I'm like,
17:24
Speaker 1: what is this friend circle like in real life? Because
17:28
Speaker 1: this group of women travel all the time together. They
17:34
Speaker 1: spend whoever amount of money. I wonder if they all
17:36
Speaker 1: fly like first class, they all get like a PJ
17:40
Speaker 1: and then go on girls trips, And of course, one
17:42
Speaker 1: of the girl's trips resulted in Edward being here. But
17:48
Speaker 1: it's such a funny situation where it's like, is it
17:51
Speaker 1: that are all these people on the same block and
17:55
Speaker 1: the same could sac like how do they all know
17:57
Speaker 1: each other? Or some bar method ladies are people part
18:01
Speaker 1: of a friend group where those guys know each other,
18:03
Speaker 1: you know, like what is holding these people together? Is
18:06
Speaker 1: it just the neighborhood. So basically, Marissa is like, I'm
18:12
Speaker 1: changed and I don't like the person I am, and
18:16
Speaker 1: isn't your partner is supposed to bring out the best
18:19
Speaker 1: part of you, Well, this person is bringing out the
18:21
Speaker 1: worst part of me. So I have to get rid
18:23
Speaker 1: of him because I know I'm great usually, so it's
18:26
Speaker 1: his fault that I'm horrible to him, and then me
18:32
Speaker 1: talking about it and being so mean about it about myself,
18:37
Speaker 1: it's also being mean to me. Okay, god bless She's like,
18:45
Speaker 1: will he ever be that guy that I can take
18:48
Speaker 1: to a black tie event or a rodeo, not that
18:52
Speaker 1: I ever go to rodeos, And it's like, yeah, he
18:53
Speaker 1: absolutely can't take him to a rodeo first of all,
18:56
Speaker 1: and you can't take him to a black tie event.
18:58
Speaker 1: He's like a handsome, strapping man that he's dressed totally
19:00
Speaker 1: fine for this and also by the way a lot
19:03
Speaker 1: of dudes need to like rent a black tie suit
19:06
Speaker 1: for a black tie event, so you would just go
19:10
Speaker 1: and rent him a black tie suit. That's like his measurements.
19:15
Speaker 1: That's one of the unfortunate advantages that I have to
19:20
Speaker 1: succumb to for some reason. Like as a female or
19:23
Speaker 1: as someone who presents female, both you have. You have
19:29
Speaker 1: a lot of like looks, you have a lot of
19:32
Speaker 1: like dresses. You look a lot of like that kind
19:35
Speaker 1: of thing like, and if you go to a black
19:37
Speaker 1: tie gala, like you really can only wear a couple
19:40
Speaker 1: over and over again before people are like whm, and
19:44
Speaker 1: you usually own them, Like, you definitely can rent them,
19:46
Speaker 1: but you know, a lot more people, a lot of
19:48
Speaker 1: more ladies or friend presenting own stuff like that, where
19:52
Speaker 1: dudes or men presenting peeps can just rent them. They
19:57
Speaker 1: all look the exact same, just a black guy suit
20:04
Speaker 1: with whatever accoutrements in the neck part they want. That's
20:08
Speaker 1: just all all it has to do is just be
20:10
Speaker 1: black and tailored to them. Oh wow, you know, and
20:15
Speaker 1: you just wear the same thing over and over again.
20:17
Speaker 1: It's like it's the un It's funny. It's like we
20:19
Speaker 1: think about uniforms for schools all the time, Like at
20:22
Speaker 1: the school school girl uniform, I can't talk Catholic school
20:26
Speaker 1: girl uniform, and I wore that uniform a lot, And
20:31
Speaker 1: yet different schools had different colors. But men remote Again,
20:39
Speaker 1: all that said before, when they go to events, they
20:41
Speaker 1: had the exact same uniform usually isn't that crazy? Okay anyway,
20:47
Speaker 1: and they get rended, as I already said, so crazy,
20:49
Speaker 1: So great for them, great, good for you, Okay. She
20:56
Speaker 1: just really is leading into the fact that she feels
20:58
Speaker 1: like she made a mistake and and because of that,
21:03
Speaker 1: it was a whole conversation with people to even get
21:06
Speaker 1: people to be on board with him, with him being
21:09
Speaker 1: over here, with like her bringing him here. So now
21:11
Speaker 1: she's afraid of people judging her about that. Oh God,
21:16
Speaker 1: poor Marissa, Poor Marissa, Marisa, so sad for you. And
21:25
Speaker 1: she's like, even like, I don't even understand this guy's
21:27
Speaker 1: so nice to me. All he wants to do is
21:29
Speaker 1: fuck me. He loves me so much. He'll eat my
21:32
Speaker 1: like dry ass chicken and steak or whatever. And I
21:35
Speaker 1: mean that, you know, theoretically, and you know figuraily, you
21:38
Speaker 1: know what I mean all of it. And at the
21:40
Speaker 1: same time, it's like, I'm so cold. I was just
21:43
Speaker 1: this most disgusting hard boiled eggs and he takes it all,
21:46
Speaker 1: takes it, and then I just I don't want him now.
21:55
Speaker 1: Would it be horrible if she was like, you know who,
21:58
Speaker 1: I do want my ex husband now? He doesn't fit
22:03
Speaker 1: the bill. I do think it maybe her ex husband
22:05
Speaker 1: would be like somewhat around at a rodeo. I don't know
22:08
Speaker 1: why she's said the rodeo situation. I don't know if
22:10
Speaker 1: she's just like, here's the thing, remember how cowboys were
22:16
Speaker 1: the hottest thing in a certain part of like twenty
22:19
Speaker 1: twenty five. Is this that is she just like been
22:25
Speaker 1: scrolling on TikTok and like cowboys and cowboying has been
22:28
Speaker 1: like on a algorithm, and she's like, that's what I want.
22:31
Speaker 1: Yellowstone Bella hadide Bellahdide has a cowboy. I want a cowboy.
22:38
Speaker 1: I'm Marisa, So we both a supermodels deserve a skinny
22:46
Speaker 1: supermodels doing bar riding cowboys. So anyways, uh, okay, I'm
22:57
Speaker 1: so sorry, truly, am I you know whatever? A little bit. Okay,
23:02
Speaker 1: let's move on to Katie and Josh. This can be
23:05
Speaker 1: a long hard too. So her family is having Easter
23:10
Speaker 1: for all of them, and before they get there, he
23:15
Speaker 1: says he's going to cook for them a mint sauce
23:18
Speaker 1: and sausage roll, so her mom needs the grocery list.
23:24
Speaker 1: I found this interesting. I found this interesting. I sometimes
23:29
Speaker 1: I think it's interesting when guests cook for hosts in
23:37
Speaker 1: their home, not in the the following capacities makes sense
23:44
Speaker 1: for me. He seems to be cooking this for them,
23:48
Speaker 1: like this for a dinner. It doesn't feel like he's
23:50
Speaker 1: cooking it, or maybe I don't understand. It's just a
23:53
Speaker 1: side of one of the Easter things. And he's like, yeah,
23:56
Speaker 1: you guys get the Easter ham and the happen. I
24:00
Speaker 1: don't know what happens with an Easter potato potatoes. And
24:06
Speaker 1: I'll get the sausage roll with mint sauce. And they
24:09
Speaker 1: were like, yeah, you get that. Like sausage rolled mint
24:13
Speaker 1: sauce doesn't even sound something that we eat here now.
24:16
Speaker 1: Mint sauce is interesting in itself, Like the only time
24:19
Speaker 1: I hear of anyone eating mint sauce is my dad.
24:22
Speaker 1: He'll eat mint jelly with cork chops, So what you
24:27
Speaker 1: do I think so or it was something that he
24:30
Speaker 1: used to do like, at least what feels like fifteen
24:33
Speaker 1: years ago. If I was Katie's mom, M'd be like, Oh,
24:40
Speaker 1: it's okay, Moundy, we got it. Don't worry. You're our
24:43
Speaker 1: guest to we got it. Just sit back, relax, make
24:46
Speaker 1: our daughter happy. She already asks a bunch out of you,
24:49
Speaker 1: so just pay attention to her, give her attention, pay
24:52
Speaker 1: attention to her. Get her off our hands. That's what
24:56
Speaker 1: we're asking. That's all we need. That's all you need
24:58
Speaker 1: to continue to do. We'll get everything from here. So anyway,
25:03
Speaker 1: God bless. Before she gets there, though, Katie drops the
25:06
Speaker 1: fact that she's very Luthrin, very Luthrim and wants her
25:11
Speaker 1: kids to go Lutheran or go bust, but she definitely
25:16
Speaker 1: wants them all to go to church. She's like, huh really,
25:19
Speaker 1: She's like, yep, and it's a deal breaker if you
25:21
Speaker 1: say no. And at this point we're like, well you
25:23
Speaker 1: just try to say pick up things out of the
25:26
Speaker 1: ether and being like it's a deal breaker, you know
25:29
Speaker 1: what I need? I need someone who thought Clueless was
25:36
Speaker 1: the best movie of all time. Deal breaker. I mean,
25:39
Speaker 1: that is the best movie of all time. But like
25:40
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of like somebody would just be like, oh,
25:42
Speaker 1: that's arbitrary. I mean know, I know that religion is
25:45
Speaker 1: an arbitrary, but she doesn't seem to be anyone who's
25:47
Speaker 1: like paid a lot of attention to it thus far
25:53
Speaker 1: or uses it or talks about it ever. Hever, So
26:01
Speaker 1: she's like it's a deal breaker though, so you know what,
26:03
Speaker 1: get out now. But she is like, I did talk
26:05
Speaker 1: about this once. He's like, yeah, early on, I wonder
26:10
Speaker 1: how she did talk about it, Like if she was like, hey, Josh,
26:13
Speaker 1: just so you know, if it ever comes up, it's
26:15
Speaker 1: incredibly important that we always stay Lutheran, that you become
26:18
Speaker 1: Lutheran or at least we go to church sometimes, and
26:20
Speaker 1: if we ever have kids, they're gonna be Lutheran. Period.
26:24
Speaker 1: So remember this. If that conversation happened, then God bless her.
26:29
Speaker 1: She did it. She did what she would had to do.
26:31
Speaker 1: She communicated. But in this moment, he's like, you don't
26:37
Speaker 1: go to church regularly at all, he says, So we
26:47
Speaker 1: realize what we think is true, which is that she
26:49
Speaker 1: doesn't go to church regularly though at all. So like
26:55
Speaker 1: it's like this, I don't go to Catholic church regularly
26:59
Speaker 1: at all. If I was to get married, would I
27:03
Speaker 1: kind of like to get married a Catholic church? Yes?
27:05
Speaker 1: Why because the one I want to get married into,
27:08
Speaker 1: which is like Melchites Byzantine, like in the valley, is gorgeous.
27:13
Speaker 1: It's not beige nothing, It's not boring. I'm not you know,
27:19
Speaker 1: there's a lot of great looking Catholic churches, and there's
27:21
Speaker 1: a lot of like whatever looking Catholic churches. And there's
27:23
Speaker 1: a lot of like Gothic looking Catholic churches, truly beautiful ones.
27:27
Speaker 1: This one's like a Byzantine one. It's crazy, it's gorgeous.
27:30
Speaker 1: So I wouldn't want to get married there. Plus I
27:31
Speaker 1: have history. I'm not saying I have to, but I'm
27:33
Speaker 1: saying I would like to. Would I got want to.
27:34
Speaker 1: I wouldn't want to get married in any other church
27:36
Speaker 1: unless it was like some for some reason, super beautiful
27:39
Speaker 1: Catholic church. But other than that, like, no, I'm not
27:42
Speaker 1: going to ride it. I'm not gonna be Lutheran, and
27:44
Speaker 1: I'm definitely not gonna be what Asia is. Period. So
27:50
Speaker 1: all that to say, but you know, I wouldn't make
27:56
Speaker 1: someone go to church with me if that person didn't
27:59
Speaker 1: want to and I would kind of want to, baby,
28:04
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, baptize my kids just because this sounds horrible
28:07
Speaker 1: because I want them to have a godparent. Okay, well, whatever, Goupless,
28:13
Speaker 1: this is the Catholic you know. So I'm a culturally Catholic.
28:15
Speaker 1: That's fine. But Dna said that and I was like, oh, yeah,
28:17
Speaker 1: that's what I am. I'm definitely culturally Catholic. Okay, Goupless,
28:20
Speaker 1: but you know I'm not. Whatever. Okay, get out of this, Chris,
28:23
Speaker 1: stop talking about it. Okay. Good. The next morning, they
28:26
Speaker 1: are rushing to get to the airport and they have
28:29
Speaker 1: one of those like kind of tickets where you can
28:31
Speaker 1: just change your flight, like your number, real fast, like
28:33
Speaker 1: the like I guess there's like, you know, multiple flights
28:36
Speaker 1: leaving because they're in Portland and they had to just
28:39
Speaker 1: fly down to what looks like San France Airport, so
28:42
Speaker 1: you know, can you imagine there's probably like flights every
28:45
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes. And she's taking her time because this is
28:52
Speaker 1: highly triggering for her the transition, or at least it
28:55
Speaker 1: is for me, and I get it, but packing and
28:57
Speaker 1: triggering and having to get to there by certain time
29:00
Speaker 1: now also breaking down and having to leave your place,
29:04
Speaker 1: you know, like especially for a couple of days, means
29:09
Speaker 1: cleaning out refrigerator and taking out the trash and maybe
29:15
Speaker 1: putting away the things that you were packing from the
29:17
Speaker 1: night before or if you were packing. You have to like,
29:19
Speaker 1: you know, like try and make your place look livable
29:21
Speaker 1: and not like torn asunder. You know all that now
29:25
Speaker 1: we all know, and if you're listening to this, Katie,
29:30
Speaker 1: it is imperative that us folks that don't love that
29:34
Speaker 1: executive functioning do things the night before, or that we
29:41
Speaker 1: go to bed cleanly, happily, serenely knowing that almost all
29:48
Speaker 1: of our work is done and that work hopefully has
29:53
Speaker 1: been checked off from like a check off list, an
29:57
Speaker 1: anton check off list, No, like where you've had a
29:59
Speaker 1: to do list where you've really been astute about what
30:02
Speaker 1: you've packed, because you know, you're like, do I have
30:04
Speaker 1: my charges? Do I have my meds? Do I have meds? Katie?
30:09
Speaker 1: Do I have you know, like whatever, do I have
30:10
Speaker 1: my underwear? All the things? Do I have in place?
30:15
Speaker 1: Put that all together, break down whatever you can in
30:19
Speaker 1: your apartment, or get it settled so that you can
30:23
Speaker 1: run and do it in the morning after. I know,
30:25
Speaker 1: like you know, like sometimes like taking out your trash,
30:26
Speaker 1: you have to like wait until the moment you leave
30:28
Speaker 1: because you have trash. We're trash making people. So Josh
30:33
Speaker 1: is upset because she has expressed that she has these
30:36
Speaker 1: issues and he has never lived it day to day
30:39
Speaker 1: to know how it manifests. So it manifests in things
30:43
Speaker 1: like this where he is upset and he leaves to
30:45
Speaker 1: go get a donut because he's been ready and he
30:49
Speaker 1: told her to be ready on time and she was,
30:50
Speaker 1: what not ready on time? So she got mad at
30:53
Speaker 1: him in short with him and was like, you could
30:55
Speaker 1: just change it, asshole, Just fucking change the flight. And
30:58
Speaker 1: then he does, and then he's still being an asshole
31:01
Speaker 1: and she's like, I don't get it because now that
31:02
Speaker 1: he's changed the flight, we're gonna be there so early.
31:05
Speaker 1: So just live and let live live and let die,
31:11
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know. But they talk in the
31:14
Speaker 1: airport and he's like, you need to just calm the
31:18
Speaker 1: fuck down. She's like, Okay, I apologize. I get it.
31:27
Speaker 1: She seemingly doesn't take accountability for the ways in which
31:36
Speaker 1: her dysfunction manifests and affects other people. And we are
31:42
Speaker 1: a social beings so like, surely what we do and
31:48
Speaker 1: say and the way we say things and the tones
31:51
Speaker 1: and the words we use, like all of that like
31:55
Speaker 1: is all read behavior by someone else. And it's interesting
32:00
Speaker 1: to know that you have some you know, challenges or
32:07
Speaker 1: issues when it comes to obsessive thoughts and that sort
32:13
Speaker 1: of regimented thinking and not being able to sort of
32:19
Speaker 1: like let go and let be that is in your
32:24
Speaker 1: head sort of like you know, is how you see
32:28
Speaker 1: other people and their behavior. But they don't have to
32:34
Speaker 1: live by your standards and your inner thoughts. They get
32:38
Speaker 1: to live by themselves. And like you know, like especially
32:42
Speaker 1: in relationships, you have to sort of find that boundary
32:47
Speaker 1: and appreciate your inner thoughts where you say what you
32:51
Speaker 1: want to on your mind and you just like you're
32:54
Speaker 1: like okay, and then you go about your business and
32:59
Speaker 1: you allow whatever they want to do to be whatever.
33:02
Speaker 1: And at the same time, you have to also compromise,
33:05
Speaker 1: because if you tell someone that you're going to do
33:08
Speaker 1: something or be ready by a certain time, you have
33:10
Speaker 1: to do that. Now you have to also understand that
33:14
Speaker 1: you're going to have to be ready in your mind
33:16
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes before because things always come up always. That's
33:23
Speaker 1: the yeah always. I mean I wonder if there's some
33:29
Speaker 1: like executive Functioning manual where you'd like, first things first,
33:32
Speaker 1: get air tags on anything you possibly can that's important
33:35
Speaker 1: to you, your phone, your wallet, your sorry phone, your keys,
33:40
Speaker 1: your wallet, your god bless any gym bag, your computer,
33:45
Speaker 1: you know bag, but also your computer being there but
33:48
Speaker 1: if it's closed or whatever. And also, like I said,
33:53
Speaker 1: packing for everything that night before, picking out outfits the
33:56
Speaker 1: night before, pre steaming or doing anything like making sure
33:59
Speaker 1: whatever you have to do you know where is ready
34:01
Speaker 1: the night before, paying bills on auto pay as much
34:07
Speaker 1: as you possibly can, designating time throughout your week as
34:12
Speaker 1: like a time scheduled thing for you to do certain
34:14
Speaker 1: things and adhering to them like the Bible, so that
34:16
Speaker 1: they get done, and also inserting time to rest so
34:20
Speaker 1: you're not overstimulated and overworked. I don't know, you gotta
34:23
Speaker 1: really do all those things and then sleep enough. I'm
34:26
Speaker 1: going to water and some social time and some vitamin
34:29
Speaker 1: D from the sun, some movement. Okay, So they lay
34:34
Speaker 1: in San Jose Airport and we meet her mama where
34:37
Speaker 1: I've been. We've been so excited to meet her parents.
34:39
Speaker 1: Also to be like, what's happening here because who's co
34:43
Speaker 1: siting this and who's not saying what we've been screaming.
34:46
Speaker 1: And the truth of the matter is, now we know
34:49
Speaker 1: she has parents. They understand they've been saying the things
34:53
Speaker 1: that we've been saying. She either hears it or doesn't
34:56
Speaker 1: hear it, or doesn't subscribe like any sort of like
34:59
Speaker 1: important to it. Therein lies the rub okay. Her mom
35:07
Speaker 1: was like, as a kid, let me tell you. I
35:09
Speaker 1: get it. I mean I want to tell you, but
35:11
Speaker 1: I mean I will tell you right now. She was super,
35:13
Speaker 1: super bossy, and I like Josh for her because she's
35:19
Speaker 1: always asked obviously I had to tell people how things
35:22
Speaker 1: were and how things should be. But he seems to
35:25
Speaker 1: make her think less of herself and more towards others.
35:29
Speaker 1: She's just like a bossy ass kid. And that was
35:32
Speaker 1: a character flaw that she has had her entire life.
35:35
Speaker 1: And so her mom's like, if you don't watch out
35:41
Speaker 1: with this bad behavior, with what you've told me that
35:43
Speaker 1: you did for your birthday, which was tequila and kissing people,
35:45
Speaker 1: if you don't fucking stop that, you're gonna hurt someone.
35:49
Speaker 1: And that's when Katie says, like murder now we are
35:56
Speaker 1: rational people, so we have to assume that that is
35:59
Speaker 1: in fact dark humor. Is it dark humor meant to
36:04
Speaker 1: distract from the kind of real conversation we're happening right now.
36:09
Speaker 1: Maybe she plays it so dryly that you know, her
36:16
Speaker 1: mom is like, no, maybe not no, not murdered, like
36:19
Speaker 1: hurting someone's feelings spiritually, And she's like, oh, it's so
36:27
Speaker 1: on the nose for like a sort of naive person
36:29
Speaker 1: that you couldn't imagine it to be true, that she
36:32
Speaker 1: wouldn't think that like her behavior would affect anyone badly. Besides,
36:38
Speaker 1: in her only option was like if she had murdered
36:40
Speaker 1: someone being too drunk, would she also considered could be
36:44
Speaker 1: a possibility that was the first possibility is a little crazy.
36:54
Speaker 1: So her family are followers, like she said, which is
37:02
Speaker 1: like horrible but brillianto him. And their house is really
37:05
Speaker 1: really nice. I mean obviously they have like you know,
37:08
Speaker 1: some financial security there. You know, there's brick, there's Spanish Chile,
37:13
Speaker 1: and her parents have been knowing that she can be
37:19
Speaker 1: over the top too much. Her mom says that she's
37:23
Speaker 1: lost multiple friends, that she's just too much and people
37:26
Speaker 1: just get sick of it. Her dad is like, you know,
37:30
Speaker 1: it's great to have her for the first two or
37:32
Speaker 1: three days because she's energetic and Mike flyun fun lively.
37:35
Speaker 1: But then after that third day, how do You're just like,
37:38
Speaker 1: get them out of here. I want to watch TV
37:41
Speaker 1: and piece I don't want to hear it. I don't
37:42
Speaker 1: want to have to deal with you, which I thought
37:46
Speaker 1: was interesting. Yeah, they're all like we have probably been
37:51
Speaker 1: through her shenanigans and how to deal with her, and
37:53
Speaker 1: they're probably very happy she doesn't live amongst them. I'm
37:57
Speaker 1: surprised they've all allowed themselves to be on the show. Definitely.
38:02
Speaker 1: Obviously they're like, Josh, please stay please, you know, if
38:08
Speaker 1: this is a rodeo, honey, I mean, please ride this bull.
38:11
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, like, get her, you know,
38:13
Speaker 1: to just chill out, to think of other people, teach
38:17
Speaker 1: her the ways, you know, And he seemingly knows that
38:22
Speaker 1: he's with someone who is who needs that on like
38:25
Speaker 1: a visceral level, Like it's like teaching someone who hopefully
38:34
Speaker 1: cares and wants to be taught how to consider others others,
38:41
Speaker 1: But it's it's I don't know enough about like OCD
38:45
Speaker 1: or what not. To understand like or what other things
38:48
Speaker 1: like you know, neiral divergent things can be massaged, you know,
38:55
Speaker 1: like I've seen on like you know, like I love
39:02
Speaker 1: on the Spectrum show where people on the show are
39:09
Speaker 1: seemingly cognitive behaviorally guided towards decision making or changing their
39:17
Speaker 1: thought patterns to consider others and be a little more
39:22
Speaker 1: like socially upped in that way. And I wonder what
39:27
Speaker 1: her parents did, like therapy wise, for her seem they
39:32
Speaker 1: know they her mom is very much like when you drink,
39:36
Speaker 1: you make bad decisions. And she seemingly told her mom
39:43
Speaker 1: what her birthday was like in a way that made
39:46
Speaker 1: it seem like she thought her mom would be like, wow,
39:48
Speaker 1: you did what girl? No, no, Katie, girl, no, don't
39:54
Speaker 1: do that. Ough crazy though, Like every time she says that,
40:04
Speaker 1: you think she's considering that to be the reaction her
40:07
Speaker 1: mom's like that makes me sad. Makes me sad that
40:13
Speaker 1: you drank tequila with your fiance present and then try
40:16
Speaker 1: to make out with other people when this is something
40:18
Speaker 1: that you know that you have a problem with so
40:21
Speaker 1: and you haven't changed, makes me sad. And you're telling
40:24
Speaker 1: me this right now, almost proud of it. She's like, Oh,
40:30
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I didn't realize it would upset you. And
40:35
Speaker 1: that's what is weird about it. You're like, what is
40:37
Speaker 1: Katie's mindset? What's her point of view behind that you
40:42
Speaker 1: didn't think it'd be upsetting to your mom? That you
40:46
Speaker 1: make decisions that are like really cruel and human humiliating
40:51
Speaker 1: for someone to have to deal with And has anyone
40:58
Speaker 1: ever discussed rehab with you? Because that, I feel like
41:02
Speaker 1: is the next conversation she needs to be in. I
41:06
Speaker 1: mean like i'd be like, Katie, before we before you
41:10
Speaker 1: get married, do you think that you should go away
41:15
Speaker 1: and like see if we can nip this in the bud?
41:18
Speaker 1: Or do you think he can stop drinking? It occurred
41:23
Speaker 1: to me when he was unpacking at her parents' house.
41:30
Speaker 1: She was like, do you need anything from me? And
41:32
Speaker 1: he was like, just a kiss maybe, and then she
41:34
Speaker 1: gave him that kiss. We know that she's insecure, right,
41:37
Speaker 1: Like the whole thing about why she wants to make
41:39
Speaker 1: go with people is because she sometimes feels insecure and
41:41
Speaker 1: bar situations, specifically of course, with alcohol, where she then
41:44
Speaker 1: wants to feel better by putting her lips on other people.
41:50
Speaker 1: But he's also insecure, and I think that that common
41:56
Speaker 1: denominator is the common denominator of their entire relationship, is
42:02
Speaker 1: that they both feed a need for each other, is
42:04
Speaker 1: that they're both insecure people, and together they're less and
42:11
Speaker 1: secure because they, you know, make each other feel whole good.
42:16
Speaker 1: Right scene, fucked loved buity boops. Okay, so, oh my god,
42:28
Speaker 1: we have so many more people to talk about. Okay,
42:33
Speaker 1: all right, my loves. That means this is the end
42:36
Speaker 1: of part one. Thank you so much for listening. If
42:39
Speaker 1: you have a yet, please go ahead give me five
42:41
Speaker 1: stars wherever you listen to podcasts, as well as follow me.
42:44
Speaker 1: I'm at Chris Elfarah on TikTok, on Instagram, on YouTube.
42:49
Speaker 2: Of course, I have a Facebook. You can like my
42:51
Speaker 2: page Chris Farrah or join my group Vanity Farah there
42:55
Speaker 2: and at the same time give me five dollars on
42:57
Speaker 2: patreon dot com slash Farah. Thank you guys so much.
43:02
Speaker 2: All right, babes, I will talk to you later and
43:05
Speaker 2: go ahead listen to part too.
43:07
Speaker 1: Bye.