Latest / Frankie and Johnny: The Conversations We Never Had / 18 Years. Zero Excuses. This Is What Loyalty Actually Looks Like.

Transcript

18 Years. Zero Excuses. This Is What Loyalty Actually Looks Like. · Frankie and Johnny: The Conversations We Never Had

• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: Hi everybody.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: This is Frankie, and this is Johnny.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: And welcome to new edition of Conversations We Never Had.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: So it's uh it's been a crazy couple of weeks for me, and a lot of stuff we're gonna uh I'll be diving deep into over the next couple of weeks, and we have to start talking a lot about again uh what it means to be a man.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: There's a lot of things are going on that um we're not happy with, and we we need to raise our standards.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um in any event, uh this week is about this young man over here.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's a big big week.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: 18 years old, son.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: 18 years old.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: You're uh considered technically an adult.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: Or legally, you're an adult.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: Um what does it feel like?
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like what what what would you um yeah, what does it feel like?
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I mean, doesn't really feel any different from any birthday, I would say.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I guess yeah, I'm an adult.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: I could uh I could vote now.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_01: Um other than that, there's not really much else.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um a lot of people are watching.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: What what have you seen?
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: I know like from one day to the next you don't notice, but what would you say, like let's say from freshman year or eighth grade to now?
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like what what have you learned what's been the same?
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: And you you mentioned one question at a time.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm stacking questions, you don't do that.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Uh you said you can vote.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: Do you think everyone should be able to vote?
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like you think everybody has really understand situations enough to be able to make decisions that are so important for the people running our country.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, yeah, there's also there's people that um maybe don't know as much about politics as others do.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but at the same time, I feel like it's hard to, you know, pick and choose those people that can actually vote uh based off of what they know and don't know.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's probably gonna i I mean, it would be difficult to to manage that.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: So going back to that question uh from like freshman year to now, I would say uh for the kids out there that maybe a freshman or going into freshman year next year, um, you're gonna start off with a big group of friends.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh it's freshman year, you know, you meet a lot of people, um, depending on what school you go to.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_01: Uh my first my first year at school, my class was I think that was like 450 kids, so it was a lot of kids.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: And and I had a good amount of of people that I knew, um, that I still called friends and stuff.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um I still talk to them.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: Uh but at the same time I feel like each year it kind of like narrowed down those those uh big groups into smaller and smaller groups.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um which I'm fine with.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: I mean I I feel like the people that that have stuck with me are the people that you know I truly care for and and actually care for me.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: So uh just a heads up on on, you know, you're gonna start with big groups and then it comes smaller and smaller, and when you get to college it's gonna be even smaller, so um yeah, and I feel like also high school's taught me a lot of things uh about maturity, um, and how to become, you know, a young man into the real world and how to respect people.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_01: I mean it's been uh it's been a great journey to be honest, these last four years, so yeah.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's uh well I w we can get into a conversation about I think there's things can be difficult uh when you mentioned as far as the voting, but I think you know we we need to do better, like we need to do better.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: We need um better standards as as who's representing us and who's leading us in the future.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: Um as far as uh some of the friendships and relationships and and 18.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: I have to say, son, you're you're you're the youngest of the family, but uh I or and and and I think you're very well maybe the wisest.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um your ability to don't get carried away on this, okay?
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but as a father, it's uh I'm overwhelmed with emotion to see who the man that you're becoming, your ability to deal with challenging, difficult, almost impossible circumstances, uh dealing with adversity and and climbing back and stay loyal, staying caring, showing compassion, empathy, your love for people, your heart, man.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: I I'm I'm so grateful, blessed, gifted to have the title of being your dad.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um as I say that you know somebody asked me not too long ago, or no, it's been a bit with everything that that I've done in my life that I've gone through and and and that I've put our family through.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: Why have you stayed loyal to me?
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, first off, you're my dad, so I mean I love you.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um but at the same time I I've always seen like your your sense of facing adversity and always trying to be like the best version of yourself.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: Even when you went through those hard times, um you kept trying and trying for us and and you never stopped and you never quit on us, no matter what.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um I knew that it would probably take some time when I was little.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was harder.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: I know now like obviously we have a good relationship and and it's good now.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_01: But before it's it was like we had that good relationship, but at the same time there was a little bit of like that tension.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: And I knew that in order for for us, I guess, to break the tension, it was it was the drinking, and I knew that you could stop it.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: I mean I always believed in you, so why?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: Well first of all, thank you.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um watershed here of of of emotions, uh why?
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: So many people like like what was different about so many people quit on me or didn't believe in me or didn't have the faith in me.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: And this isn't I uh I want to be very clear, this is not me attacking.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: That's not that's not my style.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: That that that that that's not there's no need to name drop.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm grateful for everything for for the hardships, the pains, the lessons.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: Everything's a a a I wish technically it was different, but I uh not but and at the same time I I know that it's not things there's eight billion people on this earth, and life doesn't turn out the way we expect it to be.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: And because of that, we end up building these walls, resentments, anger.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: If we really were to look at everything, that it's a gift, and try and find out the reasoning behind it, not to excuse our behaviors, but to find out the reasons, what can we learn, then you're grateful for all of it.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: As I say that, everyone did, or a lot of people gave up on me.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people didn't see things the way that that you did.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: What was it?
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: Like what why?
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: Like, did you see things and feel free to share whatever comes to you?
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: Did you see what others saw?
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: And if you did, why did you choose no?
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm standing by your side no matter what.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like I believe in you no matter what.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: And did you make the right decision?
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yeah, I 100% I made the right decision because my dad is is the uh in my eyes, he's an amazing human being.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: He's always um gonna be there for me, as well as my mom.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: Um I know they'll always be there for me and I I'm always gonna love them.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um I feel like some people when when chat when you get when you face challenges in your life and you know the road's not always like the charts not always so high, and you're gonna have some values in it.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_01: Um people just quit there and they don't keep trying.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel like I mean to be honest, it was just believing in in you and Yeah, I feel like people just maybe gave up on on a relationship with you only because they didn't want to face those challenges anymore.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I understand, but at the same time it's like after that person has changed, why wouldn't you try to make up for it or or try to go back to them and and make a I guess have a relationship with them?
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's uh Yeah, I mean I don't know, I can't really answer for other people, but that's what I I think.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: Like it was just like I believed in you more than others.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_00: But what did you see?
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: And and and see, this isn't just I want to be clear, this isn't just about me.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Because right now there's people watching that are going through a similar experience, and they feel like maybe it's too late for me, or maybe they're in your shoes, or they're on a different level, but they're going through a similar experience.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: So I I I I I I know that maybe you know, dig dig a little deeper.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what what was it that that you believed?
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because I want I want everyone to know, like uh thank you for that, son, um, about when he said you're a hundred percent and that you believe I'm I'm a great person, but you're a great person.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: Whoever's watching, there's a part of you that maybe you've life has hit you and you've built walls and barriers, but beneath every single person, we're all a bunch of whether we're grown-ups, 18, 50, 80, whatever, we're a bunch of eight-year-olds with bodies that are older.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: We're acting whatever our eight to ten-year-old self, whatever pains, whatever hardships, whatever meaning we chose to give it, and we're calling that this is who I am.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: So I want you to mention, share with the audience when you say, like you saw something, something, there was a reason, or was it you?
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: What was that like belief that you just said, no, I'm I'm gonna stay here?
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: Because what happens many times is I hurt a lot of people.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_00: I hurt a lot of people in my life.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: I never want to hurt anyone.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: I I am obsessed with people.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like I I love without conditions, without um restraint, and yet I hurt a lot of people.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: My drinking, my explosiveness, especially with the drinking, it's uh a little tidbit um for you out there.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: There's uh a reason that you young people may not know, but um a bunch of liquor stores and alcohol stores and stores that sell alcohol used to be called almost all of them wine and spirits.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: You familiar with that?
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: Never heard of them before?
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: So the reason that it was called wine and spirits is gonna blow your mind, was because when people would drink too much, they would say that, oh my god, it was like you were possessed by an evil spirit inside of you because people acted completely out of sorts.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: And while many people will say, well, that's their true self, that's how they really talk, and I was one of them guilty of that.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's what they really feel.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_00: We have a lot of thoughts, a lot of thoughts, and a lot of our thoughts aren't very good, but we don't act upon them.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: Now, there's a reason that we don't act.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: If everybody acted upon all our thoughts uh uh that we have, then um we'd probably all be in prison right now for some crazy thing that we did.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: So um one thing's to have a thought, one thing is to act upon it, and I heard a lot of people along the way.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: Um so I I I going back, like wh why did you what did you see at somebody else did?
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_01: I mean I honestly don't know.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: Don't know uh what I answered already was honestly like what I saw that people didn't like the belief in you and you facing the adversity.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um how did you see me facing adversity?
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like what somebody was watching right now, whether it's a parent or like a teen who feels like they want to give up on on a parent, or whether it's maybe a f a family member, what would you tell them?
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: I mean if it was a kid with a parent, I I mean they're always gonna be your parents.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um maybe you you wanna like distance yourself, like I guess physically from them, and not spend as much time around with them.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: But they're always gonna be your parents, they're always gonna love you.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_01: And um I feel like you should always have those convers that like a conversation with your parents no matter what it is.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um and if it's it's another family member, I feel like like have a certain boundary, but don't ever don't ever hate somebody for it, for what they did or bring them into your world, like what what were you feeling during during some of the these um moments and that we're talking about and and that you didn't give up on me?
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: Like what what was that inner feeling that that you were having?
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: Were you grappling with?
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean I was I was scared because I was honestly it was just me and my dad and there was times where it was just me and my dad and he'd be drinking and and I was scared because of what I went through when I was little.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um What did you share what you went through?
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, the whole thing, like we we talked about a couple episodes about Captiva, um, and just like other situations of him drinking, like holidays, um, which kind of get like rowdy, I guess, with the family.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um but yeah, I mean it was just me and him, and I was obviously I was still not not like cute, like I wasn't How do I say this?
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_01: I mean I was still like a little boy.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_01: Uh uh not super little, but I was I wasn't like I am now.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_01: Um You're still my little boy.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, there was those times that I was I was scared, I was nervous, um what was your what was your question again?
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: Well no, like so for those people because you were you were giving advice to some people who were struggling to maybe have conversations with their family.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean just just like have a certain amount of boundaries, but like I talk to everybody in my family, and I'm the the only one I think that does, that talks to everybody, and I'm grateful that I I do.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um some people might not like each other within the family.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_01: Uh but honestly, I I don't care because that's not I mean you might not like each other, but like I'm not gonna that's not gonna ruin my relationship with that person, um, like whatsoever, because they're my family, I'm gonna love them.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: And well, this is good.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: This is really good because this goes to every single person, and now Thanksgiving is coming up and the holidays are coming up.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_00: This is really good.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you because this is like an ability.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: You've you've had an ability to be able to navigate difficult situations within within the family of being able to maybe there's people that don't like each other.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like right now, I would say 100% of everyone who's gonna hear this podcast or will listen to it at some point, I think everyone know.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_00: I know everyone has a family member that there's friction with.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: What is your advice to them and how you've navigated and been able to keep everything okay that they can take from what you your experience?
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean, don't don't ever give up and and love your family.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, they're your family, they're gonna be with you.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_01: They're always gonna be there for you no matter what.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, there's always there might be this tension and stuff, but there's always this love and and connection that that families have.
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um well, most families, I mean, I'm not saying 100% of the time.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, son, son, but I want you to stay on the okay, because I don't want you to lose lose it.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_00: You're doing fine.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: What what I want I want to come out clear is not because every every family, you know, that there's love.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because even if there's if you don't like somebody, you really, really don't like them, like, oh, I can't stand them.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: I you can't stand them because you love them.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: There that there's a lot because if you didn't care, you just wouldn't care what they felt.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like there wouldn't be any tension.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_00: But there's an op.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, you do, you do.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_00: Whoever's listening, no, it's not me.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_00: If that's you right now saying, no, that's not me, and you're getting all defensive, it is.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody disappointed you, somebody hurt you.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_00: The expectations that you had for whatever person weren't met.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: And you're still stuck in that feeling.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: But beneath that, beneath all of that, there's love, a certain level of love.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_00: What can you say to them?
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_00: Because you've been able to maintain, dig beneath all that, beneath maybe anger, disappointment, hurt, and still find that love.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: What can you share to them?
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_00: What were you able to do and maintain that relationship without there being like that that friction?
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I was just honestly the bigger person.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, kind of leave the well, you are the biggest one in the family, but that I don't think that's the big bigger you met.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_01: No, um, yeah, I mean, I was just the bigger the bigger person in the situation, and I I forgave people.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um forgive people for what they do and and I guess just keep going on with that relationship.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um don't forget about what they did.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_00: But people get stuck on that.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: You're giving a lot of opportunities for for and maybe inside you're like, damn it, I guess just not said so much.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um that's why we're here.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: That's why we're here.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: And none of this is scripted.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't think we were gonna go so deep here.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_00: Uh what was it?
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you have, your ability to forgive?
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: Because a lot of people say forgiveness.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but uh people don't.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_00: Don't.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you really forgive, like there's just no barriers.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, hey, it's over.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: There's no bringing it back up, there's no there's no tension.
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's just it's gone.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you do?
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: How how is it able to do then that you could maybe some advice can you give on to somebody out there who's like holding on like these burning hot coals?
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you know, there's a it's like holding a burning hot coal like you want to throw at this person you're angry at, but you're burning yourself.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: What can you tell them so they can let go of the coal?
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_01: Um exactly what you said, like holding those grudges against those people, it's really like I promise you guys, it's not gonna do any any good for you.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_01: Um so I've decided like honestly, one one piece of advice that I would say is like I never want to regret anything.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_01: And of course I I've had a couple regrets, but I'm still young, and I feel like living life with regrets is is horrible because you can't change what happened.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: And one regret that I don't want to have is is not having a relationship with any like of my family.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_01: Um so I mean it's hard to forgive people, but at the same time, like like you said, like you have that burning coal on in your hand just drop it and let go.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_01: Um let go of it.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: Move on.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um you can't change the past if none of you guys know that I uh um I mean I hope it sits in because everybody's stuck in the past thinking, oh, like what this person did to me, what this person did to me.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like just move on.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um you don't know how that person is now, you don't know what they've changed, you don't know what they they do now.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, like let go, let it go.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: And and again, remember when uh a little while ago, a few minutes ago, I I mentioned we're a bunch that you're 18 years old, you're the youngest, but you may be the wisest.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_00: Because oh, what they did, what they did, what they did.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: What does it sound like?
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: Sounds like an eight, ten-year-old who just didn't get his way, and oh, because I want candy, I want candy.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: Why can't I go out?
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: Why can't I go out?
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that's how we are.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_00: And and somehow, and I'm not making fun of anybody, I'm just saying that's how we generally are.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm talking to you, that talking because those things come into my head, and I'm sure there's moments you're like you get upset, oh they did, and then how does it feel?
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: What do you find in those people around us, or around around you, because we're talking about you, that won't let go of whatever it is, uh, whether it's a friend, whether it's a family member, or whomever it is that you you you've seen that stays in that place, would you call that word what anger?
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: There's uh a grudge, yeah.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_00: Grudge.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_00: What would you say about people like that, as opposed to maybe how how you feel about situations?
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like wha wha what difference do you see?
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_00: So it was somebody out there who's holding on to some of those grudges, anger, whatever it may be.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna lie, I'm I'm stubborn sometimes and I get defensive, but when it comes to those situations uh when it comes to those situations, you know, I step back, um, and realize the bigger picture.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_01: Um on the other hand, the people the other people might like they're defensive, uh, their egos ahead of themselves, and they can't really they only see what's what's happened and now like I said, the bigger picture and the future and and what could happen.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_01: They only realize uh what actually did happen.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, they're stuck in in that I guess in that like fantasy world of thinking that nothing's ever gonna change.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_00: No, but what happens to the people around them?
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like w what do you feel when things like that get mentioned overall that you've that you've been involved or you've seen or or witnessed on the outside, what do you feel like the energy around it?
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_00: Because it does it is it look like it stays with them or does it go I don't want to lead you to an answer, but what do you what do you see around?
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean it kind of rubs off on the people that that you that you hang out with for sure.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like if you're living with anger and grudge or regret based off of what you're talking about with other people, that energy where focus goes, energy flows.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: So there you go, Tony Robbins, the the the young gun here.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: Um which were we'll be there, UPW, November, walking on fire, Frankie and Johnny.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: We'll try, we'll do our best to film it and uh and throw clips on here.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um but it's true, look, it it's true.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: You could feel off the energy, and this is the thing whatever that energy comes, whether it's to a former partner, uh, a son, a daughter, uh a sister, a brother, you're in your relationship with your partner at home, it becomes toxic to every relationship around you.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you're you know, I I was with Michael uh, I think his last name is Singer.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um he wrote The Untethered Soul.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: Brilliant wise man.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh it's like when we're sick, right?
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: What people doctors give us medication to stop the runny nose or to stop the cough.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_00: But the truth is we have to, there's something inside of us that we have to let out.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: We have our nose has to clear, our cough has to come out.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: But it's just like when that anger and that uninability to forgive, we keep it inside, and we keep it inside.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: And what we're doing is that toxicity is inside, and it goes to everyone around us.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: And until you let all of that out, really, and forgive, that's where you're free to be yourself with everyone around you.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um so uh let's uh kind of we're kind of like wrapping this up, uh son.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_00: So some exciting news you want to share on on a little bit on about what what we're doing now, or what we're we're reaching for here?
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah, so expand on it a little bit.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure you guys have seen on so on social media.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_01: Um we joined a contest of it's called tophost.org.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_01: And um it's basically you know what what we're trying to do um is just help everybody, like help fam any families, any parents, any kids out there.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_01: Um I need to listen to somebody, maybe that are scared to have those conversations with each other.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_01: Um I'm sure you guys know what we're trying to do.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_01: And uh yeah, we joined this contest and we would love for you guys to drop a vote.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_01: We posted a video the other day.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_01: Uh the link has been on our story and yeah, the link's been on our story, and um we'll we'll we're gonna make a post soon, probably today or tomorrow, about the the step by step, because some people are asking questions and getting confused, and we just want to make it clear to everybody.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so look, it's look, this starts as a podcast, but there's other avenues that like the crisis that we're facing, and it's not being talked about nearly enough, and we don't we're not being guided.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: There's nobody out there, or that let me reframe that.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_00: There's very few people offering solutions, and I'm I'm sick and tired of hearing about the problem, and I I don't feel enough people are doing something about it.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_00: So there's several avenues that uh we're building things and we're gonna do something about it.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_00: And it's gonna start, you know.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just um not gonna share too much right now, but there's the stuff for for young people, and uh a lot of it's starting to build from young people and and get off of the phones and get into play.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like get into to and what I mean by play, it's not out in the playground, although uh that'd probably be fun.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I don't know about you know how many how many pull-ups I could do with the monkey bars.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but but what I'm getting at is really getting out into FaceTime one-on-one.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_00: Look, we spent so much time, and I know many of you are watching this, you're like, yeah, and this is for you young ones, yeah, yeah, yeah, man.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we need we need to do that.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_00: Scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna wake up one day, and you're gonna be 50, 60, 7 years old.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: And as of right now, I think the number's higher.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_00: New data's coming in the last weekend of October or of this month.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um 11.7 years of our lives.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_00: The average person is we're on pace to spend of our lives 11.7 years just scrolling.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_00: Not watching uh how-to video on YouTube or watching something just scrolling.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: 12 years and going up, and if we think that AI is gonna make things better, it's not.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to imagine one day, you're 60, 70, 80, 90 years old, because we're living longer, too, and you look back in your life at the memories that you have, and you're having a hard time sitting with them.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you look back in your life, you spent decade, a decade or more of your life looking at the parts of someone's life that they want you to see.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_00: So it's time to start putting our phones down, getting in person, because I guarantee you, when you replay the memories of your life, not one time will you ever think about, oh, I remember that day that I was scrolling and I saw that story on TikTok, or I saw that guy.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, what you're gonna remember those moments you were outside, you were laughing, you were connecting, you were in community, in person.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe one of your friends did something stupid and you were laughing, or you finally had the courage, sassed your girl out, or you kissed, or you held hands, or you hugged?
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: When are you gonna start bringing that together?
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_00: And that's that's what this is all about.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's bringing people back together, and that's why we're doing this.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_01: Um I don't know, forgive others and and don't hold don't hold the grudges.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_01: That's my takeaway.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_00: And um again, um a lot of lessons to learn from from you, son.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: I I I'm I'm speechless sometimes, and when I look at you in in awe and wonder, inspired, and and like can't wait to see all the things that you what life has in store for you.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_00: Um thank you for that.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: So remember, top vote.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna drop a link.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_00: Top host.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_00: Top host, top host.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's with Ryan Seacrist, by the way, from American Idol.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and uh we get a we get a catch prize, but it's all going re being reinvested.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's really about getting the opportunity to be with Ryan Seacrist, iHeartRadio, and get this message out there, bring, bring in some host, talk about the situations, the struggles that we're going through, and start start bringing solutions instead of talking about problems.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what we got today.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_00: So this is Frankie.
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_00: And this is Johnny.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_00: And thank you for joining us for the conversations we never had.
• 32:41
  unknown: Thank you.