Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #181 Adopted Life and Fake Finger Labour Support with Proud Dad Ryan Jon

Transcript

#181 Adopted Life and Fake Finger Labour Support with Proud Dad Ryan Jon · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Matt Ashton.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I love?
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: I know, I know you love football, you love beer,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: you love lingerie. I think what else have I missed?
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: I love sleep, you love cross podcasts, integrations, usions, fusions, fusions.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: If you will.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: And this week we have a very special guest from
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: a very popular podcast.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: I call him a megastar. He's a megastar, a podcast megastar.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's paving the way I would say.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, pioneer.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: I love this.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: He has crawled through the world of podcasting, so mere
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: mortals like us can run.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: And walk and and all sorts of different methods of transportation.
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: I'm talking about Ryan John. Ryan John, right, does sound
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: like Ryan John?
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Ryan John, not Ryan and John. There's not two guys,
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: there's only the one.
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: It's Ryan John, who happens to be one half of
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: Tony and Ryan.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: That's just they are dominating. They pump out five like
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: a big old like they're wearing leather with whips, just
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: dominating the podcast world.
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: Are you trying to turn me out? You're trying to
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: make me come dude? What've lit up?
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Well?
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: What do we talk about?
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Man?
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: We talk about the fact that he has a fake finger. Okay,
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: because something happened when he was younger, a sporting incident,
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: and that it was redamaged during the birth of his child.
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: We also talk about Ryan's biological mother giving him up
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: for adoption when he was born. It was several days
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: later that the hospital requested his biological mum returned to
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: the hospital to give him cuddle's post surgery.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: I think this is the first time we've had anyone
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: on the podcast who speaks about their experience of being adopted.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: So this is our first with two doing dads, and
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: it's the first time that I've been able to have
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: a deep dive into what it's like growing up knowing
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: that your parents aren't your biological parents.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: And his mum actually gave him up as an ultimate
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: sacrifice so that he could live a life to his
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: full potential. And look at him now, I know it's crazy.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: She actually left him a letter for him to read
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: when he was old enough, which is really really sweet.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: It's an amazing story. He also talks about meeting his
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: biological father and will and connecting with his biological family.
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: He continues to have a relationship with them.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Ash shall we get into it?
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Oh? Absolutely?
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: And you like that big boy, Welcome back to three
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: doting dads.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: I am Maddie, Ja, I'm.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: Ash, and I'm Ryan. Thanks for having me and I
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: come with a scandal.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Hold, he'll be quick as podcast all my parenting. It's good.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: It's the bad and the relabel and we don't give advice.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Scandal hit me.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: Before the scandal though. I just want to apologize. I
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: smell a bit garlicy because I'm trying to kill a
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: parasite and Matt has been giving a shit about it.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: So how do you kill a parasite? Gallic really don't
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: pass this information onto anything. Well, I'm back to day
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: one because it came back so or it never went No,
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Is this like a medicine alternative?
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: Are we conspiracy adjacent show here? Or are we?
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: We have on occasions been known to slag off the
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: medical world, particularly vets and rural doctors, but we we.
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: I got it from TikTok at the remedy that works.
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: I just went with that and chat GBT backed it up.
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: So I thought that's two scientific.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: Facts, two reliable sources.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: Sam.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: I think Matt' has been a hat. Oh yeah, do
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: you want him to get better or not.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: I was like, when he's weak, like medicine, he comes
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: in and he's.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: Apparently the antibiotics makes you feel way worse.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: I don't want anyway, scandal scandal, So I said, is
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: Laura here today? And what did you say?
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: She's at work.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: I've come from Life Uncut where I did a show
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: with Keisha and Brittany and that was it.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: She's having an affair, but I'm here.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: I mean, but if she's work and I was at
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: her work and she wasn't there, then what's the real
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: fucking story.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: Well, the thing is my wife has about twelve jobs.
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: It really works out. Yeah.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like, we would really like a new car.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: So if you want to get back and do it.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: She was working at Tony May her story. She was
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: there making making rings.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: She still do that regularly.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: Her, she designs. Yeah, I called her. She's an answer.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she's still a ward bottle today. So we called her.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: She's rejected our calls. This is getting juicy.
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: Thank you for bringing this to smell right, that's just
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: my gallic breath.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: Also, thank you. We were alerted our listeners.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: Ye, who I think I should have crossover?
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: This crossover cross over now, yeah, Donna as Donna's she
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: may be a Tapa first and Dota second.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: That's not it's not about it's just where all. It's
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: all fine.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: She was a quick Listen to today's episode yep from the
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: twenty sweper the market.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: Now you guys got half an episode today. Wow?
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you, thank you. You can't buy that kind of advertising.
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: So the rule is that you can't turn if people
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: have just had a baby, You can't turn up empty handed.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: Do you appreciate that? Or is that annoying after a
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: while where you're at after three kids?
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: And no, you know what, I always accept food, and
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: I think if you are going to bring anything, I
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: think you're always going to have a winner when you
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: bring food with you because it's just there's no better feeling.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: They're not having to cook from scratching meal. So thank you,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: you're welcome.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: So we brought a lasagna from Melbourne, flew it up
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: to Sydney and it has been an ordeal. But Tony
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: did her famous bechamel sauce that she makes from like scratch.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: What's bechamel? Um?
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: That's a great question. Does anyone can anyone help with that? Yeah,
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: it doesn't work, but Tony made it from scratch on
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: the weekend because she was going to knit something. But
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: then apparently for babies you can't have like big chunky
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: knitted stuff because their fingers get stuck in it. Yeah,
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: we'll do a lasagna. And she makes a great lasanna
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: and she felt bad that she couldn't come up as well,
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: so she's like, all, I can send my love through lasagna.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: The comments about yourself, Like Tony.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: Is a huge ash fan.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: I love that.
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: I think she said a few things on the show,
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: but it's what she says after the show and regularly
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: it was like like this will be her scrolling, like
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: she's like, you know, having lunch tween episodes whatever, and
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: she goes, oh, jam Pike, she's a huge And I
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: don't like, you gotta take the winds week So I'm
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: sorry Matt that I don't have any words from Tony
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: to pass on.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: I've got everything I need.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Tony, I can confirm. And I think I
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: mentioned before the flight attendant like would not let me
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: hold the le onion on the flight, so made me
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: put it in the overhead compartment. I was like, you
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: have to put it up there, and I was like,
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to do that. I wouldn't, no, lad no, because.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: He said, but under the seatond front, they're the rules.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: Well he said it's a projectile and he goes, it
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: could go flying when we take off. You got to
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: put above. And I was like, and I don't know
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: if you noticed this, Like Tony wasn't generous with the foil,
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: like it's a.
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: Very travel for travel safe for later. Yeah.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so like yeah, like you kind of see it
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: coming out of the sides and whatever, and I was like, she.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Left about at most two centimeters side.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: And I was like, I'm not not going to put
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: it up there for me. I'm not going to put
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: it up there for all of the other people in
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: the plane because they're like we came at like business o'clock,
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: so everyone's got their briefcase and laptop bag. I'm like,
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: there's going to be whatever the fuck that is the
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: besha male source is going to be everywhere. And then
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: I was like I'd said I and it's actually I
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: think we got on camera, so when I'll go back
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: and look at the footage, because Lil was filming me
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: walk down the aisle when he came up, was like,
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: but then he said put it under the seat in front.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: And then so when you take off, obviously the front
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: goes up and then the lasagna slides back down, and
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: so we're like, I've got my foot like trying to
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: hold it down little at one stage, like I probably
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: looked harrowing from a few rows up because she's got
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: her head down like trying to hold the thing, but
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: it ends up her head's in my lap trying to
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: and it was fucking chaos. So I hope you enjoy it.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Do anyone say anything?
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: Lots You will never be more popular than carrying alasagna
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: onto a plane because everyone was just all right. If
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: I had a doll off every time someone went is
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: there enough for all of us? I would have flown first.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Class to it.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: So they loved it. I'm pretty sure the flight attendant
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: at the first was like, oh, you're allowed to take
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: it to Sydney and I was like, oh really, and
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: she goes, yeah, you'll have to leave it with me.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: And then like a lot of people were real chatty,
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: and I said, someone goes, what's that for? And I said,
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Australia's Golden couple have had a fir child and then
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: and everyone kind of went, that's so lovely. Like I
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: was expecting a bit of like change, but if I
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: saw someone with a lasagna, I'd be like, are you
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: fucking sick?
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: That's alarm bells?
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just like seriously, so I was kind of
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: expecting to be that, but genuinely everyone was like, that's
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: so nah and they thought I made it such good.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yes, my friends have had a baby, like, oh,
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: they love that.
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: Like, I'm not coming up for any other reason other
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: than the.
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: Mom is going to be so proud.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've heard that this is your mum's.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: This is my mum's behavior, passing it on to the
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: next gen, just like if it was a Carbondar, we're
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: gonna get of it. Who hates lasagna anyone?
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: The time there, I wasn't a big lasagnian, did you?
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: Was the only thing I was concerned about is when
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: my daughter Mabel was born, Like, you know, someone brought lasagna,
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: thank you so much. The next day someone drops in
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: a lasagna thanks and after about the eighth lasagnia, just
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: go fuck. I'm pretty over Lazani. And that's what I
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: was concerned is.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: A lasagna shortage. I've been waiting since the birth of
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: People are coming and they have little hampers, and in
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: those hampers they have some wife and some you know,
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: like a little teddy. And I was kind of like
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: looking for the lasagna and I was like, amongst the teddies,
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: none here, Like under the napp is not one lasagna
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: at all. People, I don't know what's happened. They've gotten spooked.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: It's the price of the sheets.
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: There it is. That's the real scanner, for the love
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: of God.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: So thank you for being the only lasagna that I've
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: received since both the birth of Poppy.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: Yea and how are you guys? Because I have one
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: and it is tough. And then I think do we
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: speak on the phone like a year and a half
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: ago and you were like, I think we're gonna have
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: another one?
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that sounds about right.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: It's a real random because we don't like but it
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: was like a one random call you and you're like, oh,
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: something about work, and you go, I think we're gonna
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: have another one, And I was like, you're fucking joking.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but you know what, like, obviously this is about
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: you today, Ryan, but obviously, but I'll answer this one question.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: You better.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: Someone once told me that the jump from one to two,
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: jump to one is the biggest jump of all. Then
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: one to two is also a big ish but a
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: lesser jump than the first. From two to three, there's
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: a lot of jumping going on. Jump with me, with me,
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: try to keep it okay, sorry, but the jump from
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: two to three, it's not really just like an extra
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: It's like it's barely like it's half a step?
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: Is it just because you're so frazzled anyway, Like what's different?
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're so locked in. Your life is already over.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: You've let go of all type of enjoyment outside of
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: being a parent.
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I just sent you on Instagram. It was a video
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: of a three person child, so that you just you just
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: put in like it's one seat kids going that, hey, the.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: Three of us go for a cruise, and that the
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: sign is.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: But yeah, we're doing okay, we're doing okay.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: It is.
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: This has been something that we've been trying to make
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: it work since like early days of two doting dads.
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, lockdown.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: Well last time, well the first time you were sick,
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: oh yeah, because I was coming out here and you
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: were like quick and it was just like that was
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: your fault. And then I know we stopped coming to
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: Sydney because then because you didn't want to get sick,
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: get sick. Every time I come to Sydney, it's like
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: for boring meetings and stuff.
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, city's pretty like like one big boring meeting compared
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: to Melbourne. Like especially like you go anywhere in Melbourne
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: at like any night of the week and it's something happening.
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: To Sydney, it's like lock it down.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm glad I'm finally here because it feels right.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: And I'm also glad to finally meet someone else who's
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: passed out in the birth suite because as someone who
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: also lost consciousness, I've always felt alone and then knowing
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: you're also a pansy make me feel better. Yeah, I
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: thank you for being here.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: I didn't do in the epidural.
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: So early on I think I was the same. It
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: was way early and I'm just like I've never been
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: good with blood.
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, touch and go, Like sometimes I'm like sweet, But
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: in that particular moment, I just remember waking up on
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: the ground with my legs in the air and I
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: had a juice legs in the air and a flannel
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: over my head, and I was just like, look at
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: this guy.
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: I thought that'd be nice.
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: What do you mean?
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: But the staff that April.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: She was being cut open. She just wanted to hold
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: her husband's hand for support. I spent the whole time,
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: and you're there were three nurses and midwife and' psatrician.
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, took photos of me to shame you.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: The doctor made fun of me, I assumed when she
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: lean over, she was it happens all the time, worry.
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: But she was just like, that's so embarrassing for you.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: I just like kept doing what she was doing fair enough.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: What was the moment in particular where it made you
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: pass out?
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: I do think it was like epidural town or they
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: were doing something and Bridge was in a lot of pain.
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: And then I've actually got a fake finger. This finger
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: isn't real, so see that like little scar down in
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: the middle of it. So when I played volleyball, I
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: broke it like ten or twelve times to the point
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: where it's just like callous and cyst and there wasn't
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: actually much bones.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: They like replaced it because of the spiking is at
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: the spik.
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: Blocking so with the other people spiking because I'm not
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: that tall. I've just like for years just you know,
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: and oh and then after ten years they just go,
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: there's not much left. We're going to have to replace it.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: So I've got a bit of my wrist is in
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: there and a bit of coral yout wrist finger. You've
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: got wrist finger, Well, they're going toral, yeah, because it
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: calcifies and kind of like you know regenerates.
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: Did they tell you where the coral.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: Is from a place that is not struggling with the
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: environmental issues. Yeah, but they're going to use a bit
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: of my hip. But then I have a fake hip,
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, if you want to get some bone
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: out of there, you're not going to find what's the
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: fake hip front. Also, volleyball, I landed weird and I've
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: got like like the ball and socket a bit broke off,
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: so it kept like falling. So they just put a
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: bit of like plastic on. And I was like, if
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: you go hunting for bone bone in my hunting for
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: bone down there, you're not going to find my space
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: will take it from the So anyway, Bridget was squeezing
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: my hand and so and so the other hands were
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: hurting and I was just very aware that like twisting
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: that finger could just like set off whatever's going on.
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: So I was like really nervous, really, and she just
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: squeezed so hard because Bridget's strong as fuck. She's like
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: a trade and so she's just got manhand. She was
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: a winemaker, so she's actually works hands on and she
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: like she's climbing up ladders, carrying barrels like she's and
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: she and so when she decides to squeeze my hand
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: as hard as she can, like it's almost like she
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: squeezed the soul out of my person. And that's why
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm getting a bit lightheaded. And then yeah,
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: I think it was the epitrool or they were trying
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: to do something and it wasn't working, and there was
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: a bit of blood and the squeeze, and I just
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: was like the roomor's going wider, the rooms going wider.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: And then I just like leant back and I was like,
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: good night, did you hit the deck?
• 16:06
  Speaker 5: No?
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: I landed in a chair, luckily, but I think one
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: of the nurses could see me going, so she made
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: sure a chair was behind me, so she was like, oh,
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: this guy's a fucking gone. And then so she'd like
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: put the chin, and then I kind of fell back
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: and kind of sat in it, and it made it
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: worse because I feel like, if you fall on the ground,
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: it's like, oh, well, he's obviously like he's in trouble.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: He's in trouble. Yeah, But when you just like, oh,
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: it's getting to be much for me, might just sit
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: chair and put it up, and it just yeah. And
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: so I'm just sitting there like sort of like this.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: I don't think I was fully out, but I was
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: just like like I had seventeen years, all of a sudden,
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: I hit the deck.
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: I was like on I was sort of on my
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: knees anyway in front of April like that, and I just.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Went gone, yeah, it's it, daint Like, obviously there's someone
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: in there. Your welfare is who we need to care
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: for at this moment, Like if you hit.
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: Your head, like I mean, the hospital so I need
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: and where I need to be.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's concussion, yeah, hed trauma.
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: But I'm right, I think.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: You've had too and you're you've you're done now I've.
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: Had the snipect me.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, all right, because I wear one and I think, yeah,
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: like that's it. I think so we're going to come back.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: Okay, we're gonna We're just going to jump far forward
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: when you were a youngster. Yes, and we want to
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: know one thing about you when you're little.
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what's the most trouble that you ever got in
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: as a child?
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: Do you want like cheeky or like what an asshole?
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: Whatever comes to mind?
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you can answer this way in a way that
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: you feel fit.
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: This doesn't paint me in a positive light that I respect.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: We've had people who have murdered animals. We've had people
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: who have been arrested for stealing.
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: Oh, I've been arrested, but that isn't it. I didn't
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: even consider that. That's a funny one. I've got arrested
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: for jaywalking and did a night in the tank, but
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: that's not that's not this one. The most in trouble,
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: like at school in trouble. Yeah, so I'm like no
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: good at science, Like not my area. Sorry, And so
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: what do kids do when it's not there? That's when
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: you start getting silly, because if you're into the subject,
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: you're into the subject especially and they put a buns
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: and burnery.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: Open flame on the desk.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Decisions, Yeah, and so if I'm interested or you're good
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: at it, you'll do it. But it's when I just
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: don't get it, and so I'm just gonna amuse myself.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: So anytime I was in science, I was always like, oh, Ryan,
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: it's a bit of a troublemaker. And so I got
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: moved like to the front of you know, like come
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: sit up the.
• 18:24
  Speaker 3: Front, keep an eye on you and that open flame
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: on your yeah.
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: And so I'm sitting in the front row and someone
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: from the back row has lobbed a rubber and it's
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: hit the blackboard next to the teacher and she's turned
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: around and looked at me and just gone Ryan. And
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: first of all, I never like the fact that I
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: would have utensils or anything of use is my first defense,
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: because I just pen if. I was lucky, never had
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: a pencil case, no way. And so I was like,
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: and I was like, you know, I'm a piece of shit.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: You know, I don't have stuff to throw, and she
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: just kind of gave me this look. And then I said,
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: I'm so embarrassed about this. I said, if I had
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: have thrown it, I wouldn't have missed. Ah. I made
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: it as if because I'm a really good throw, and
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: she's taken that as like, oh what you think of me?
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, and like saying it now and hearing it,
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: but like I went to the coordinators and got suspended
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: and stuff.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: You little can't yeah exactly.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: And when the head guy, mister Pringle's his name, he goes,
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: you know you said this, and I was like, now
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: that you say it, I can hear it. But what
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: I meant was what I meant was, mister Pringle, I'm
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: a good throw. And I was a meter from her. Yeah,
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: but who's me? And I said, mister Pringle, you've had me,
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: you know what? You know I don't have.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I played volleyball like I'm an athlete, you.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: Know, I don't have rubbers and pencil shower. And I
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: also did give my friend a horseshoe tattoo in the
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: metal room by heating up a yeah yeah, and he yeah.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: Kelsy mc goes, oh, don't you think would be cool
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: if I like put my arm like he had his
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: arm on it, and I went, I'm like put it on,
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: and he like screamed for thirty seconds and then he
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: looked at it and he goes, fuck, yeah, my heel
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: is it still permanent? Well, his name's kelsy mc so
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: he's got scars all over him and I don't know
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: which was men. It was there for a few years
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: full of horses.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: What a childhood?
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: Wow. Yeah, we didn't have a uniform at our school.
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: I don't know if that makes a lot more sense
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: after what you've just heard, but no school uniform. I
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: didn't really wear shoes that much.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: So how do you decide what to wear? Each day?
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: Well, that's the thing. Like other people ask that all
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: the time that don't but after the third day you
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: stop kind of giving a fun because it's just normal.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: So you just like end up wearing jeans and a
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: T shirt and whatever. And it was like a pretty
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: artsy hippie school and so like everyone was just doing
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: their own thing and like it was fine.
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: I've never been to school with that uniform.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we had one high. Yeah, we're always like they
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: are away from them.
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: I'm from Alpham and there's two schools. There's Alpham High,
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: which is where i'ment with no uniform, and then there's
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: Alpham College where if you like have a kid that
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: like is smart, like they would go there and if not,
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: they would go to Alpham. Alpham college is like legit
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: and often like go from Eltham, they go, oh really,
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: and I got not that much. I didn't let start
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: the train track.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: You've spoken about the fact that you are adopted.
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: Yep, quite a lot.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: Do you remember when it was that you were first
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: informed that your first memory of being told you were adopted.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's like almost a Hollywood thing where like,
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: you know, like the kid finds out and it's like
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: this big moment. But the reality is for ninety nine
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: percent of adoptees is that you just grow up knowing.
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: And so adoptive parents have asked me like, oh, when
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: should I tell them? And I might tell them before
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: they're old enough to understand. It's like when you, oh,
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: when did you take your first breath? I don't know,
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: I just started a break, Like it's just so natural.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: So for me it was I just always knew. So
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: that was never like a big reveal or a big
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: moment because they were telling me before any wondering why yeah, yeah,
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: and then and we always used to joke about it
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: all the time. So my mum's like a rat bag
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: idiot in the nicest way possible, But when she is
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: an idiot, that well, clearly I'm adopted because I'm not
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: related to her. It's just a very like natural dialogue
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: in the house and stuff, and so yeah, it's just
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: really normal. And like since I've like talked about it
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: and post online, I've got a lot of dams from
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: people being like, oh, I thought I was the only one,
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: but like same, Like it was just really normal. But again,
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: you watch movies and it's.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: Just it's like, you're not my real mom, Like did
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: you have those moments?
• 22:37
  Speaker 5: No?
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: Never, like really never said that once because she is
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: my mum in my mind. I don't know any different,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: and we're like, pretty soon.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: Did clean your room or put you up?
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: Well? I don't think So it's good to know she
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: might have thought it, but I think she They had
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: twelve years of trying to get pregnant. Yeah, so I
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: think anytime I was a brat, they'd probably go happy
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: to have you. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, But like my
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: mum and dad got married when they were twenty one,
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: twenty two, and then they're thirty three thirty four when
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: I was dropped off. Yeah, and then so how were
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: you sorry? I was ten weeks old? Wow, So what
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: happens is every year, couples who aren't able to conceive
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: for whatever reason would like apply and like, I don't know,
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: the health department would like sign you off or go yep,
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: comfortable house, well good. And so in nineteen eighty seven,
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: that was a thousand Victorian couples that were willing to adopt,
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: and there was fifteen babies. And I often think of
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: what's that movie with Gwyneth Paltrow Starting Doors or whatever.
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: So that's like a thousand alternative lives that I had
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: just given. So I actually met someone who was in
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: my batch, like this other person that's three days older
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: than me, and he did my will when Mabel was born,
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: and they asked me about my family history and I
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: was like, oh, I don't really know medical stuff because
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: I was adopted. And he's oh, me too. It's like
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: oh what year, Oh what month? Oh what day? Saint
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: John Anglican blah blah blah, no broad Meadows, yeah, holy shit. Yeah,
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: So he was three days older. The family that adopted
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: him were like like Italian, and so he's like lived
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: in this Italian household. He's like really smart. He's a
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: lawyer now. And I'm like, oh, you could have lived
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: with my hippie parents in Alphem if it was like
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: a toss of the coin that day. Yeah, so it's
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: kind of like if you smoke. We can think about
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: that too hard.
• 24:38
  Speaker 3: Really is it still the same like process, you know,
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: like is there more to it?
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: I assume there's more to it. And I think now,
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: and I say this delicately, that if you don't want
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: the child, it's probably easier to not have it in
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: the first place. Yeah.
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: I thought you were going to say if you if
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: you get if you adopt the child, and then like
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: there's a certain like grace period.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: Actually I don't what is it really You can win
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: the oxygen on Saturday and change your mind till Tuesday.
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: One of those kids do that in the cooling off periods.
• 25:06
  Speaker 6: Cooling off with atopic a child, though, actually is a
• 25:10
  Speaker 6: really good The foster system is now you can like
• 25:14
  Speaker 6: be a foster parent to take kids on for like
• 25:17
  Speaker 6: two week periods.
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: Well I was a foster for that first ten weeks.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: So maybe that's why I ended up with Mum and dad,
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: because the foster parents were like, God, this is okay,
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: just to try about his personality. I was with from
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: four days old to ten weeks. I was with his
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: family and apparently that family had forty kids through over
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: ten years. Like they were just like, that's it. Yeah,
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: the parents don't start till ten weeks because there's the
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: paperwork and the blah blah blah. So these people just
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: took and you know what a newborn's like that they're
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: up all special breeder. I don't know who they are,
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: but like that's great. That's crazy.
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: It's like the.
• 25:51
  Speaker 5: Patience on those people and yeah, like and for what
• 25:55
  Speaker 5: do you imagine how hard it would be after because you
• 25:57
  Speaker 5: grow an attachment and you get to know them, you
• 25:58
  Speaker 5: want to people are like, oh, really gratitude they actually understand,
• 26:02
  Speaker 5: Like they think all the gratitude we say instagram much,
• 26:05
  Speaker 5: but they get it.
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we're just like I'm so grateful.
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah really not. Mum and dad get approved, like they go, yep,
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: we've signed off your approved for a child, so hopefully
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: you get one. Two years go past, they don't hear anything,
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: and they get a call on the Thursday, yeah he's
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: good to pick up tomorrow, and their mum goes, I.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: Can't do tuesdays.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: I recall the bottom who is there and goes, okay,
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: I guess we let's go shopping and buy some stuff.
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: And then mum was a school teacher, and so she goes, Okay,
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: mister principal, I'm going to need maternity leave and oh congratulations.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: When she's like, I'm leaving right now.
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: So the principal goes in apparently like mum wasn't there,
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: but goes into the staff meeting the next day and
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: goes off Mandy duns having maternity and everyone goes, she
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: was he to down she was not pregnant. Yeah, and
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: so just like and I actually met a teacher that
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: was like at that school when at the time, Yeah,
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: because when I first talked about adoption, the luck popped
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: off online and so there's a lot of people going,
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: oh and she was like I didn't actually get it
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: until watching this video thirty years later because she just
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: disappeared on everyone when pregnant. We all went okay, so, yeah,
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: what are they covering up here?
• 27:27
  Speaker 7: Yeah?
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: Kind of yeah, And so they get this call and
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: have you got a cop nut? Have you got stuff nut?
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: What do they eat?
• 27:33
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: He's ten am tomorrow, Doug.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: So then I like that style.
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's crazy to did they give you, like, now
• 27:41
  Speaker 3: that you're older, have they given you any sort of
• 27:44
  Speaker 3: like what it was like for them you transitioning into
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: the house and what that moment was like.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: Well, I think it was just the because, as you
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: guys know, it like the pregnancy is what nine months,
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: but I can feel like five years, like the anticipation
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: you just by the end. I mean, we didn't have
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: to carry the child's so I can only imagine how
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: hard it is for the mums. But it gets to
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: that point, not thirty five weeks plus, we just like
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: can this kid just turn? I'm so looking forward to
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: meeting them. My wife's really uncomfortable. Yeah, and he's here tomorrow.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: Like it's just I think it was just the shock
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: of like, oh, we've wanted this for so long and
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: we didn't have much of a build up. It just
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: happened nice that.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: Way though as well.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: I guess, yeah, you're just like adapt.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: What's it like growing up for yourself? Like what's your
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: perception of being put up for adoption? Did that weigh
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: on you in a heavy way or was it just
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: the norm?
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: And it didn't really nah, Because my birth mum wrote
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: a letter that was like, dear ryan when you're old
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: enough to understand sort of thing. And she was from
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: like a really rough area. It was one of eight kids,
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: and the eight kids shared like three single beds, like
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: it was a rough and rough area, drugs crime, and
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: she was like adamant that she wasn't going to like
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: pass that on to the next generation. So she was
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: actually twenty eight when she gave birth to me, and
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: I grew up just assuming probably like it's probably terrible
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: to say, but I just like to assume she was
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: like seventeen or you know, yeah, yeah. But now she
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: was twenty eight and she was going to night school,
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: and she was like, I'm going to better myself. And
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: if I have a family, they're not going to be
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: born into this community. They're not going to have the
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: childhood I had. And she was just so adamant that, like, no,
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: my child, I don't want the life that I had
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: for my child. So she gets accidentally pregnant and she's
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: just like, this is the kind of stuff people from
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: here do. They get accidentally pregnant and they were going
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: to change the world, and well now we just struggle
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: on and that just happens again and again, and she
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: was just so determined that that was not going to
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: be the case. And so she was also living in
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: a sharehouse, and she was just more than others, just
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: like a child needs two parents. And she didn't know
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: my birth father, and like they sort of that one time,
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: and she was like, well, this is not for me.
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: And I think also by the time she if you realize,
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: like when you're trying, you're kind of checking, she didn't
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: know she was pregnant until way into it, and I
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: think it was like past the point of no return. Yeah,
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: and so she was like, well, this kid's gonna have
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: to be born. I don't want them growing up in there.
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: And so I always go, oh, you've done me this
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: huge favor. So it wasn't like how could you do
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: this to me? I was always like thank you for
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: doing that for me, And so I was never like,
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: never once was I like what the fuck? And it
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: was like, actually the opposite, Like she felt a bit
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: guilty afterwards, and a lot of birth mums feel guilt,
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: And the only reason I wanted to meet her really
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: was just go like, you don't need to feel guilty,
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: Like all good, I've like hit the jackpot over here
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: with my family, Like I hope you're go and marry someone,
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: have a family of your own and kind of forget
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: about me and the nicest way possible.
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: Do you remember when you got that letter?
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well again I was in the drawer always, but
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: I wasn't old enough to read it, and I'm not
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: actually very good at reading still, so it actually a
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: few more years the name of but I've still got it.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: It's like a yellow booklet and it's got a little
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: ribbon and it's like dear Ryan. It's called Ryan's Story,
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: and they kind of said, yeah, you know, my brothers
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: are this tall and were back for Collingwood and all
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: this stuff and kind of yeah, and it was it
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: was pretty nice. And then she kind of explained like
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: the circumstances, and I think when you kind of hear
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: that side of the story, you kind of go, oh,
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: like it's actually quite selfless. It's not like, yeah, she
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: couldn't be bothered or she did the calling off period
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: and decided not to but the final like not that
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: we need any evidence, but like, in terms of being selfless,
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: I actually had surgery when I was three days old
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: on my hip. Hip's no good man, Yeah, hip's no good.
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: I wonder the same or something. Is that a hip
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: hernia or not. I don't know, but I came out
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: of the surgery and they're like, oh, like the baby's
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: going to be fine, but like he's going to be sore,
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: and so he just like needs lots of hugs and
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: cuddles from his family and the nurses like, well, he
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: doesn't have family yet. So she actually, my birth mother
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: really came back to the hospital like after doing the
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: traumatic like believing she like came back and just like
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: sat in the chair for two days just to like
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: kind of hold me while I was a bit and tender.
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: And so you're going to go, oh, like she cared
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: and she was doing the right thing, and there's no
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: like and I'm like, yeah, you can't be angry at something.
• 32:23
  Speaker 3: It's amazing. Yeah, like the selflessness to come back and yeah,
• 32:27
  Speaker 3: especially after that, I can't imagine, like I can't imagine
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: giving up one of my children.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: Well yeah, like I always thought that would be really tough,
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: but I just remember the first hour with Mabel, so
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: Bridge had a few complications and was off in the theater.
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: So it's just like the two of us and the
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: thought of like going, oh I love you and like
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: like I wouldn't be selfless or brave enough, like there'd
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: be no circumstance, like I just couldn't. Yeah, And I
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: think when Mabel was born, I was just like, well,
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: it's sort of like the respect I had for my
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: birth mother Julie, like ten x almost. Yeah, it's crazy.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: As an adult, you then went on the quest to
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: then find your parents. You then got in contact with
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: your dad, who was in the UK. You then flew
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: over to meet him. How much were you hoping for
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: a long term relationship and how much were you happy
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: for it just to be like a like hey, putting
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: a face to a name.
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: Kind Yeah. So I did the ancestry DNA test trying
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: to find because I never really considered my birth father
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: because I just knew he was like backpacking and it
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: was what he didn't even know I existed, so there
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: wasn't any he didn't make decisions on my behalf. So
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: I do this ancestry DNA test hoping to find my
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: birth mother, Julie, who lives in Melbourne and as it
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: turns out, live three streets from my best mate and
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: just up the road and worked at a place that
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: I've been to like like crazy.
• 33:49
  Speaker 3: So there's a chance you might have encountered.
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: I actually would be like, it's hard to believe I
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: wouldn't have. So when she she I was gonna say,
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: shouldn't have dor like she's she's now ass away so
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: we won't matter. But she worked at Vinnie's in Sydney
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: Road in Brunswick. Wow. And so I've been to that
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: vinnie so many times because we love getting a bargain
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: and got all the dress up paid, so we would
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: actually go there all the time. And so she volunteered
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: there and stuff for ages and I'm like, there's no
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: way I didn't run into it. But so trying to
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: find her down the street, no chance at all. But
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: we found some random guy in London, which turned out
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: to be easier to find, which is just insane. Yeah,
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: so we did the ancestry gena test and then I
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: write this letter to Joel and said, like I didn't
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: say like I think you're my father. I kind of
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: went I was adopted. They don't know the father my birthda.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: His name is Julie. This was my birthday. I think
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: you worked in Melbourne nine months before that for a
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: little bit, you know, I'm in London next, like, you know,
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: if you want to grab a coffee by kind, because
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: I didn't want to put the pressure on and make
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: it feel weird. But I also was like, I'm not
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: after an explanation. You don't know me anything, And I
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: think I was more of a like a curiosity and
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: just like because at the time of life, I've never
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: met anyone in my biological family. So if we ever beer,
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: that'd be like the craziest thing that they ever do.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: So I send this letter. He's like away for the weekend,
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: and the neighbor the post. He goes, oh, they away,
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: give the letter to the neighbor, and the neighbor goes, yeah,
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: cool mate, and just chucks it in the draw And
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: so a month later he's looking for an old water
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: bill opens the drawer and goes, oh, fuck, I got
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: that letter for Joe. Oh my god. Yeah, And then
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: so like it was almost that close to not meeting him.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: Also because you know, neighbor and this is like such
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: a tight art thing that I paid for, Like what's
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: that extra thing you can pay where it like tracks it.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: They're like, oh, it's like eight dollars a pen. It's
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: a peel Off thing. Yeah, but if it's for twelve dollars,
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: we'll track it. And I was like great, and I
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: was like I paid an extra four fucking dollars. And
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: so then like he sends me an email and goes, yeah,
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: like I think that's me. I hear what you're saying, Like,
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: let's do a proper test and see. So I did
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: a few swabs and he did the same, and I
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: sent it this place in London and then he emailed
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: me saying, yeah, it's a match. And then that email
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: went to my jump folder for like a week, and
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: then I got it and then I was like yeah.
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I'm in London, shoul we catch
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: up and went over there and had a coffee and
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: we had a coffee and we met at ten am
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: and we're still at the cafe four like six hours later.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: Just like if you were also in the cafe, you
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: would be like, oh, these are like two old mates
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: catching up like you wouldn't.
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: It was that sort of natural.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: And you're still stay in contact now.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, so I've been So I've been to London
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: and hung out with them three times. Tony we met,
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: we're in London, last year, and so they oh, you know,
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: we'll go out for dinner here, and then at the
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: end of dinner, Joel my birth other goes, I'll pay
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: for us, and Tony goes, well you missed the first
• 37:04
  Speaker 2: thirty years, and Joel's wife just goes, oh my god.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: And Joel did find that funny after the feat, like
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: he was like, she's joking. Oh, yeah, it's a joker.
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: But yes, I've been to London three times there originally
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: from the US. So I've done a Thanksgiving in New Orleans,
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: Thanksgiving in Austin, and then in a month I'm going
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: to Thanksgiving in I think we're going to Carbo and
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: I'll go back to Austin for a bit.
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: So.
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: So he's got two sons who are like my half brothers.
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: One of them looks like exactly like I did before
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: I got You guys have the same.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: You said, and I didn't look the same eyes.
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: We do have the same eyes. Yeah, I was like, oh,
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: you've got blue eyes and like yeah, yeah, we like
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: you both got harry chest and like, yeah, you guys
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: both got small dicks, And was like, yeah, that was
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: very crazy. But we like in compared in my family,
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: like my mum teacher, dad tradey all aunties, teachers, nurses, trades,
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: and I studied finance, which was a bit like like
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: no one was really into that. Birth father finance, two
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: brothers finance account and his brother stockbroker. Like I think
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: you might have got it from there, but like that
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: was all these crazy people got bad hips. See this scar, Yeah,
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: I have had a shoulder reconstruction. My birth father just
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: taking his shirt off.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, anyone's wondering.
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: Your pants on? Birth father, same scar, same surgery from
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: when he played like fort back in the day. So
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: there's all these like little quirky things and we just
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: find out how interesting.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: So when you were trying to have a kid talk
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: about six years, Yeah, were you and Bridge ever considering adopting.
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but because I there's a lot of kids born
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: into like unfortunate circums answers, and even still you know
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: that mums passed away, dad's in jail, like there's people
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: that are really stuck. And so I think I've always
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: felt like it was a way of like passing it
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: on or it was a genuine option, and Bridge was
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: like open to it, but it was like, oh, but
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: I'd still like to have our her own child, because
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: she's a real like Bridge had a great career, but
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: even in the heights of what she was doing in
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: white making, she was like, I want to be a mum.
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: I want to have a garden with veggies and make food.
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: And she's just like a real like Soult of the earth,
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: like she's not Italian, but like she's an old Italian
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: Honnor and so that's what she really wanted and that
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: was really important, and so I think but we did
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: talk about it and stuff. But when I was in
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: Western Australia, I kind of was thinking about adoption and
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: I kind of really understood the concept of it was
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: only starting to click that some couples just couldn't conceive
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: because you know, in high school you go to health
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: class and they're like, if you look at a girl
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: at a partyt pregnant and then it's so crazy that
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: you get to thirty and you go, it's actually really
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: fucking hard to get pregnant, which is crazy. So I
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: was like I kind of had this like I know
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: what I was going through, but I had this like
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: I can understand that, and I think I want to
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: like donate sperm is my way of like paying it
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: forward a little bit. And so there was this website
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: in Perth, and imagine what's had to have taken place
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: previously for this to be written on the website. Okay,
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: there's two women who are looking for a donor. You
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: don't get to have sex with the girls, That's what
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: it's said. And I was like, well, obviously, and don't
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: come on your computer because it doesn't work. Yeah. I
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah, obviously they need a mail for that.
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: And so I was like and then I was like,
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: how many guys have messaged for them to.
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: Need to expectations rule number one?
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, And then I think that's when I started.
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: I wasn't with like a new bridget at the time,
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: but we went like together, and then as we came together,
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: she was like, I really respect that, but I'd also
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: like to have our own first. Also, were about to
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: bust open its scandal. Can you hear someone at the door?
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: I've been inspired by you, by the way from a fire.
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: My name is right. He's a guest. I guess guess, yeah,
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: you are what he brought.
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: Guess what he brought on a plane all the way here?
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: Have one guess?
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: Jeez, close type of cheese platter, but it has it
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: was on from Melbourne Light Up. Yeah. Yeah, you've been
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: in inspiration with your traveling food hijinks over the years.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: So thank you.
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: And I'm so sorry mom, you'll have to get out
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: of the don't have to defend yourself. It's okay, I'm
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: so sorry. We'll have to banish. So then for six years?
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: What is that like? This is coming from Ashley myself.
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: We both were very fortunate and we've got our wives
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: pregnant quickly. But what's it like for yourself having to
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: go through that six year wait?
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: Hoping hoping? Yeah. We also move for work a few times,
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: so we were in Canberra, then we moved to Perth
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: and then we moved back. But like when you're moving
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: across the country, you start you're doing the like, oh, well,
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: hang on, do we just take a break real quick
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: because if we're about to move and then the support
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: like my mum's not there to and so you're kind
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: of like stopping and starting and it's not really working.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: And then you kind of because Bridge's career was going
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: really well and radio is going alright for me, we're like, oh,
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: things are going really well. Maybe it's not the worst
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: thing if like there wasn't that urgency right and start,
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: and so you kind of just assume, oh, you know,
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: not this month, maybe next month, and then oh, we're
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: moving at the end of the year. We'll wait till then.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: And then Bridget gets to that age where she is
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: a geriatric, which is written on all the forms. What Yeah,
• 42:50
  Speaker 2: a geriatric? What when you're over thirty five? All of
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: the forms they did. Laura cop that as well.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah she was because we were third she
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: just thirty nine.
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: Now did I use that to mock people older than me?
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so now I'm joking you are. Yeah, yeah, so
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: I need to change that. But even seeing that word
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: on forms is just so like yeah, but and yeah.
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: Then we did IVF. Few rounds didn't quite work. And
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: it was also during lockdown, which just made like logistically
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: really because we're in Melbourne as well by this stage
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: you couldn't really go anywhere, you couldn't do anything. When
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: I had to give a sperm sample, I wasn't allowed
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: into the hospital.
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: Do it out the front.
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: Well, They're like, you bring it in from out the front, Well,
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: they actually because I was like off in the car park,
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: you've got forty minutes from the time when you produce
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: to when you have to because then it goes cold
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: or whatever and you can't do it there. So you
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: start thinking, like, am I jerking about the front? What
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: am I doing? I didn't have a car at the time,
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: so I actually, well, I got an uber and I
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: had the cup in my jacket. You yeah, And so
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: I was.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: Hang on a second, so have you have you pre
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: booked the uber or Okay?
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: So yeah, let me through which apps open at which time?
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: So I'm on air at Kiss on the radio at nine.
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: My start on air and it's just me the solo
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: shift at nine a star then yeah, coming up, here's me.
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: I'm not here.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: The clinic opens at eight and I'm on air at nine.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, there's this sort of a small window
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: to get it done. And so Tony Lodge goes, I
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: know what I'll do. I'll text Ryan every two minutes
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: from seven forty to eight o'clock and just she's like
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: taking selfiees and smiling. She's like does this help? Does
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: this help? Made it real awkward because she was like,
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: because I told him, like, I'm gonna have to run
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: into there, I do that and come back and she's like, okay.
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: So then I get an Uber and I kind of
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: don't hate the Uber driver of this because if you're
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: an Uber driver and this person goes, can we get
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: to the hospital as soon as possible? He goes, is
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: everything okay? You know, like is everything fine? I go
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: it's actually fine? And he goes which entrance and I
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: go the one here and he goes, oh, what's going on?
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: And he's asking all these questions and I'm like, and.
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: You've got a bucket of come on his shirt.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: I've got a bucket of com a full y of
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: a car. There's perspiration on my forehead still, and I'm
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: like normally confident, is I guess? But like, I'm so
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: sheepish in this moment. I'm just so embarrassed and awkward.
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: And also I have to rock up to reception. Oh
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: where do I put the you know?
• 45:44
  Speaker 3: So I'm just so so you're in an uber with
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: a bucket of cum.
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: And so who record? How much was it?
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: How many meals well do they need?
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: Or how many in the cup?
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: I tell you what's really like humbling. He's like, when
• 46:03
  Speaker 2: I think they should make the cup was so wide
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: that it doesn't fill up, and you just feel like,
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: is that all love got to?
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: It's a thin pancake.
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: I want to start a family and this is what
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: I'm Yeah, I need a cash proent net. Yeah, it's
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: just so awkward. And then you walk in there and
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know why this makes it worse, but the
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: girl behind the counter is the hottest girl you've ever
• 46:27
  Speaker 2: seen in your hand. You just go of course it is,
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: and it's just so awkward. And I told the uber driver,
• 46:32
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I got to get back to kiss thread.
• 46:34
  Speaker 2: Can you wait out the front? And he's like, how
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: long are you going to be? And then I think
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: I think he's realized, oh it's a sperm donation place
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: and he doesn't know it's in my pocket. So when
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: I go, wait right here, I'm not going to be long,
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: He's like, am I waiting for this guy to go?
• 46:51
  Speaker 2: I've just like kept the car running out the front,
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: keep the Yeah. I talked about this on our podcast
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: and because people in Melbourne were like, oh, same, but
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: we don't live within forty minutes. So this lady, she's
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: from Melton, which is probably forty minutes away, and so
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: she was driving the car and her husband was jerking
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: in the in the back seat coming down the Western Highway.
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: And now if you heard someone jerking off and you
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: heard faster, faster, slower, slower, what are you expecting the
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: accelerator correct? Because he's like, there's a person right next
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: to me, So he's like, can you just speed up
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: a little bit so they're not right there? I'll not
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: slow down his poot. He's trying to concentrate on that
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: and do it.
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: And then is that a legal Can you masturbate in
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: the car? No, you can't.
• 47:38
  Speaker 3: If you're a passenger, you can.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: You're still you're a public you're in a car, it's
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: a private vehicle.
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: It's a private vehicle. If you're in a taxi, you
• 47:46
  Speaker 3: probably can't do that.
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: Okay, let's get a list of wherein where you can
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: if anyone's listening who works in law police.
• 47:52
  Speaker 2: That's your personal computer, Jess, don't google it, yeah, because
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: your algorithm will be fucked. But yeah, fun times I
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: buy all really, And then another time I did get
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: to go in. But I think that's worse because the
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: there is never less eye contact than when you're in
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: the waiting room. I thought you're gonna say, you do
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: it in front of you, but there's seven other guys
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: in the waiting room and you're just sitting their way
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: and you all know watching, Yeah, and then you finish
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: and you go sit back down and then.
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: Sort of everyone's grinning.
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: He's the sweatiest. It's really awkward. But yeah, I think
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: COVID made it weird. Bridget getting older like sort of
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: put the pressure on a little bit. And then the
• 48:30
  Speaker 2: strangest thing because like with you do you do a
• 48:32
  Speaker 2: pregnancy test with? Is that how you guys found out?
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: You know, the partner comes out from the bathroom with
• 48:36
  Speaker 2: the stick.
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: And I think one of the times Laura had some
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: this reminds me of that story.
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: I was like, we thought we'd dip it in the toilet.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah. We were like they like just win the
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: toilet and like, like you do like stirring some punch.
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: That's a fair question, Like you idiots. They should teach
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: that in school. But we get told, oh, yeah, will
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: call you at two forty seven on Tuesday or you know,
• 49:03
  Speaker 2: just or we get an email because we tried a
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: few times once, wasn't it.
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: It's just the least romantic.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: I'm like, this is a beautiful moment. Check your Gmail,
• 49:13
  Speaker 2: you know it's just junk. Yeah, and even we found
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: out the gender from an email. Oh wow. And it's
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: really like because you know, it's going to be this
• 49:23
  Speaker 2: moment and we're going to embrace and it's going to
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: be huge, and we're.
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: Like, what's the dialogue? How are they writing these emails?
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: Is it like just a big girl?
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, bridge got it. It's actually a very unromantic. It's
• 49:39
  Speaker 2: very scientific. Oh, here's the print out of your DNA
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: and the numbers and the this and the that, and
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: the blood says this, and the blood set and it's
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: almost like if the blood level of this test is
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: above that, it means you're pregnant. But like you're getting
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: a print out of shit that's all foreign.
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: Like like when I got my OP which is what
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: we get when we finish school, and it's number between
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: one and twenty five.
• 50:04
  Speaker 3: Ryan's just coming up along, but.
• 50:06
  Speaker 2: We thought of your school. Yeah, it's like one.
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: I remember like trying to scan the letter trying to
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: find out what it is.
• 50:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the letter itself was a test.
• 50:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what did you get?
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: I got like a twenty one out of the legend
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: is that good.
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: Is that good?
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: Twenty five is the worst.
• 50:27
  Speaker 5: One of you.
• 50:29
  Speaker 3: I was here, I am sitting next to a fucking genius.
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: Where'd you go to school?
• 50:35
  Speaker 3: Which time? High school?
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: The first time?
• 50:39
  Speaker 3: Some polls?
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: So would you get an nenter score or you're out
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: of twenty five?
• 50:43
  Speaker 8: No?
• 50:43
  Speaker 3: No, I left school. I was fifteen. It never made
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: it a score.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: Is twenty one more than you? Yep?
• 50:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yep. Look I got life lessons.
• 50:53
  Speaker 2: So true.
• 50:54
  Speaker 7: So what was it like then, jumping into the deep
• 50:56
  Speaker 7: end of parenthood? You think they just swim? I think
• 51:01
  Speaker 7: I did a pretty good job at the start. Bridge
• 51:04
  Speaker 7: bridges out.
• 51:04
  Speaker 2: Of action for six weeks after the birth, and so
• 51:09
  Speaker 2: it was just like she couldn't really move, couldn't do much.
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: So I was running around doing a lot, doing a lot.
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: She was still doing way more than me. But I
• 51:16
  Speaker 2: kind of did the night shift.
• 51:17
  Speaker 3: You can always hold over them that you can't drive
• 51:19
  Speaker 3: at that time, like.
• 51:20
  Speaker 2: Well, I guess I'll love to Maybel was born just
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: before or the twenty twenty three Ashes cricket which was
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: in England that started at ten pm every night, and
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: so that's so I said, I did the night shift
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: and this is like so simple, But the whole time
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: we were trying to get pregnant, I was just Bridges
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: trying to get pregnant or just sitting. I just kept thinking,
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: one day, I'm going to sit on the couch. I'm
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: going to have our dog Brun on my legs, Mabel
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: on my chest, the fire on, and just lay there
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: and go, this is it, and then the cricket's on,
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: and then you go, fuck that ashes a coming on.
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: And so every night we had the and we just
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: moved into our house, which I guess now is like
• 52:05
  Speaker 2: our forever house a few months earlier, and my home
• 52:09
  Speaker 2: Bridge is like, the only thing I really want is
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: a bath. That's my like, my thing, And I was like, great,
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: I really want a fireplace and whatever the rest of
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: the house is, we'll figure that out. But that was
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: our thing. And so I just remember. And it wasn't
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: just once, it was every night for months on end.
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: I'm like I'm laying here, you know, you know they're
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: kind of cooing and just like really slinging when they're
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: not screaming. Yeah, the dog who gets along really well
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: with like well, nervous about that. You know, you're not
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: supposed to leave a dog and a kid in the
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: same room. Oh yeah, you can't separate the my dog
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: and Mabel. They are best friends, that's concerning. So I'm
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: sitting there bronze on my lap, maybe was like on
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: my chest, cooing the fires on, and I was just like,
• 52:46
  Speaker 2: I've done it, this is this is the best. And
• 52:49
  Speaker 2: so as like not as much sleep and all that stuff,
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: it was just like the best. I also wasn't working
• 52:57
  Speaker 2: because Tony and I had like gone out on our own.
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: So Tony was really like we could be flexible, Whereas
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: if I had a job, like when I was working
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: at Kiss, like besides jerking it that morning, it's pretty like,
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: oh cool, Well you start at nine, so there's no flexibility.
• 53:16
  Speaker 2: So I don't know how people do breakfast radio with
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: the kid. That would just be insane. But yeah, I
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: don't know. I guess I was pretty lucky with the
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: flexibility if we win that action serious, I was a draw,
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: but we were a champion, so we retired.
• 53:31
  Speaker 3: That's right.
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: Not to bring up the adoption thing, please again, sorry
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: to Kip reminding you that's right.
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: I'm aware.
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: Did that have any impact on the way that your.
• 53:42
  Speaker 2: Parent a little bit? I think I so before that
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: The one thing that's like affected my life is because
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: my birthma made a huge sacrifice for me, I felt
• 53:58
  Speaker 2: like a lot of pressure to like have a good
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: life whatever that means to kind of like, well, you
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: made this sacrifice for me. The least I can do
• 54:05
  Speaker 2: is like do a really good job of it. And
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: so I kind of felt pressure for that. And so
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: a big word for me is like pride, Like I
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: want to do stuff I'm proud of. When I'm old,
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: I want to look back and think, oh, I'm proud
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: of the things I've done. And then I hope my
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: birth mum can be proud of the things I've achieved.
• 54:20
  Speaker 2: And so that's like a big thing for me.
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: And so ye make me cry.
• 54:24
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 54:26
  Speaker 2: But so with Mabel, I tell her every day like
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: how proud I am. But I actually, you know, like
• 54:33
  Speaker 2: it's going to lose meaning, like as like people think,
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: oh that one day Dad sat me down and said,
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: I'm so proud of you, sir. But I say it
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: all the time, like five times a day. And so
• 54:42
  Speaker 2: by the time she's fifteen, should look but I like
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: really take like you take bright in it. I take
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: pride in telling her how proud I am. When even
• 54:51
  Speaker 2: when it's really small, i'ms are, I'm really proud, that
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: was really old, that was really kind, you're sharing your
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: toys that I'm really proud of you for that.
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: It could be your thing that you don't know that
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: you don't know how she's going to take it in
• 54:59
  Speaker 3: fifty your time, which just might be shut up and
• 55:01
  Speaker 3: be like, well that's our thing.
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if we're proud of each other, I can tell
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: you from personal experience, you never get fed up or
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: sick of hearing someone say you're doing a really good job,
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: no matter who it comes from, whether it's my mum,
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: whether it's law or my wife, if it's someone at work.
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: As rarely says it to.
• 55:17
  Speaker 3: Me, I say it all the time. You don't.
• 55:19
  Speaker 2: I say it to my screen about you a fair
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: bit ash thank you. You should put that in the
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: DMS moment.
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: I think, is it is something you can say it
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: until you're black and doing the face, and I think
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: there is absolutely no I mean psychologists especial especially like I.
• 55:34
  Speaker 8: Mean when when maybe gets a little bit older and
• 55:36
  Speaker 8: she's up and running around and she's starting to establish hobbies,
• 55:40
  Speaker 8: and then she does really good, like I know with
• 55:41
  Speaker 8: Oscar when he does something and you can see right
• 55:44
  Speaker 8: on his face yea, like I without having to even say,
• 55:47
  Speaker 8: I just feel it, you know what I mean?
• 55:50
  Speaker 3: And I know he can feel that. I can feel
• 55:52
  Speaker 3: it too.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah. What's always doing at the moment that's like gives
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: you a real life job like ju jitsu. Right, Oh,
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: that's sick.
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: Shit out of other kids.
• 56:00
  Speaker 3: And he's an absolute weapon and he doesn't know it.
• 56:05
  Speaker 3: But when when when push comes to shovel the time
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: to fight another kid the other kids shipping himself because
• 56:10
  Speaker 3: I was taken down like a bag.
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, as a joke, I tried to grab him,
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: he tried to kidnap him. I tried to grab him
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: and the kid fucking fly kicked me in the face
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: and I was like, and then.
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: He dude a trade six year people up. Yeah, yeah,
• 56:32
  Speaker 2: he's like a spider monkey.
• 56:33
  Speaker 3: But when he when he has that good class and
• 56:37
  Speaker 3: he's like he's like a fucking whale on two kids
• 56:40
  Speaker 3: in their dad, I'm like, yeah, I'm proud of.
• 56:42
  Speaker 9: That, and that's always going to be there because he'll
• 56:45
  Speaker 9: probably move on from that and find a new hobby.
• 56:48
  Speaker 9: Or when he catches the foot if you feel it,
• 56:51
  Speaker 9: especially like if you you've got your kid and your kids,
• 56:53
  Speaker 9: like if dad's.
• 56:54
  Speaker 3: Proud of me, I'm proud of me.
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: One thing I've liked, so me maybole do swimming lessons
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: at the moment, Yeah, that's our on a Saturday morning,
• 57:00
  Speaker 2: we do swimming lessons and we go get a coffee.
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: But one line that I like to use because I
• 57:06
  Speaker 2: don't want to also be like the parent that like
• 57:09
  Speaker 2: we've all seen those really crazy overbearing especially fathers that
• 57:12
  Speaker 2: are like you have to win. Some love that yeah,
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: just saying like I love watching you do that, like
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: they just know that I'm out. So when she gets
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: out of the pool, like I just love seeing you swimming.
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: It does like sometimes she have a really good lesson
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: and sometimes you know she's a bit shy and doesn't work,
• 57:26
  Speaker 2: but I just I love seeing him and she just goes, oh,
• 57:29
  Speaker 2: dad loves seeing me have a go yeah, and even
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: her hearing Dad loves seeing you do that, Like you
• 57:34
  Speaker 2: can kind of see it in her go oh great totally.
• 57:37
  Speaker 2: And so when she gets older for sport and stuff,
• 57:41
  Speaker 2: I'm really trying to remind myself, like I love watching
• 57:43
  Speaker 2: you do that, is that it might be like I'm
• 57:46
  Speaker 2: glad you won, or if you lost, you shouldn't have
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: done this. It's like, no, I just love watching your play.
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Miley's trying to learn to write a black at
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: the moment and she's absolutely useless. Like the moment you
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: let go, she falls over instantly.
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: That's like April and she was like, Dad, do I sorry?
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: That's your wife.
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: She's like, did I do good? And I said, Honey,
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: you're doing amazing. That's the best I've ever seen. Wasn't
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: but she was like she was so happy to.
• 58:13
  Speaker 7: Hear you say that.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: But she like having fun trying and falling over and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: yeah yeah. And then I just love saying you having
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: fun out here total, you know, and then you don't
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: have to lie.
• 58:23
  Speaker 3: That's true.
• 58:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: When Mabel is older and she's no longer living with you,
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: what is the one thing you'd want her to remember
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: about the house she grew up in.
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: That's a great question, a simple question that I've never
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: thought of. Well, like I said, Bridget's like a real
• 58:42
  Speaker 2: nono type, like we've got we've got this huge veggie garden,
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: We're going to get chickens. Mabel has this do you
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: guys have that little thing at the bench where they
• 58:51
  Speaker 2: stand at the kitchen bench, and like, I know I
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: never got thatne but they're so good.
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: I throw it out annoyed out of me.
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: It's so good. But like Mabel loves helping, like in
• 59:00
  Speaker 2: the kitchen. And I feel like if she grows up
• 59:03
  Speaker 2: and knows that, like, oh, Mum and dad love each other.
• 59:07
  Speaker 2: I love me and we're always like cooking food, we're
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: in the garden. It's just like a really calm, peaceful,
• 59:13
  Speaker 2: healthy kind of player. I don't know, like that might
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: seem like overly simplistic, but like I just feel like
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: if she grows up and has like a pretty wholesome
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: because you know, you're always fighting the screens and it's
• 59:24
  Speaker 2: a crazy word out there, but I think if she
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: remembers home, it's like we always had like really great
• 59:28
  Speaker 2: food and you know, we always hung out together. And
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: I always make a point of being like Maybel, who
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: does dad love And she'll go, you dad loves mart.
• 59:37
  Speaker 2: I'm just really making sure that she knows that mom
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: and dad love each other. Yeah, So I feel like
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: if she's like, oh, yeah, like if she think, what
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: was your dad, Like, oh, he just loved mom so
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: much and he just loved me like that would be
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: really cool if that was what she remembers.
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: All memory stuff. Yeah, I did have one more question,
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: which I don't know if this is going to make sense,
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: but someone submitted this on our Instagram. Yeah I think
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: I'm doing this, remember it correctly. They want to know
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: what sauce you like?
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 2: What sauce?
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Does that make any sense at all? Okay, but
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: someone just said.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 2: Well, horn Day sauce is the greatest sauce in the world.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: Can you just double check the two doting dads.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 2: And she's obviously got a lot of quality comments and
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 2: questions coming through the box. It could be Tony's famous,
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: but maybe it's the besh of male sauce.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: I thought you were going to be like, oh, like
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: this is such a like in joy Okay.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: Ship was that Donna again?
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: And to finish this chat, smoky barbecue, Ryan, It's been
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: a pleasure.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: Take a pleasure. And that lasagna was out of the
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: fridge for a while. So I'll just leave that up
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: to you to decide what I'm not going.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: To get poisoning. I'll let you know either way.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: If you could send that tray back next time.
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: We thank you, mate. Ash. Look at the time of
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: recording this outro, I will admit that I have eaten
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: the lasagna. It fed the family, my children. My kids
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: don't like lasagna. That was wrong, so I tried to
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: give it to the kids. They weren't too keen. Laura
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: did have it on the first night of it being cooked.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: She was a little bit wary about how long it
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: would be safe to eat, considering that it traveled into
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 1: state unfrozen on an aeroplane. It was a long time
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: in transit, not being refrigerated, so she was like, look,
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: after night one, I'm out. I continued to eat the
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: lasagna for three or four days until Laura was like,
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: I'm throwing that fucking thing out.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: Where's the dish?
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 3: She threw that out too.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: I've kept the dish. My mum was like, should we
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: return it? Post it back. I'm like, I'm sure you
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: could just order one off Amazon and it'd be the
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: same price as what it costs to send it to Melbourne.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 3: Make sure you wrap it in newspaper, put it in
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 3: a nice box and send back. Shut up, mother, Should
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 3: we clean it first?
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: Nah? But if you enjoyed this episode as much as
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: I enjoyed Dolasagna, please give us a review. That's all
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say.
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 3: Five stars. Share with a friend if you like, or
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 3: you can join us on socials.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: Had Two Doting Dads on Instagram TikTok. There is a
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: Facebook group as well. Goodbye, Goodbye, Farewell, God bless as
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: the people who make Lasagnas would say, Adios by Two
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: Doting Dads. Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 3: people's today