Latest / Quarterback DadCast | Intentional Fatherhood & Leadership at Home / Dan Mori - Homeschooling & Hard Work

Transcript

Dan Mori - Homeschooling & Hard Work · Quarterback DadCast | Intentional Fatherhood & Leadership at Home

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Ryder and this is my dad show.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, it's Casey Jaycox with the quarterback dad cast.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Welcome to season six, and I could not be more excited to have you join me for another year of fantastic episodes and conversations really unscripted and raw and authentic conversations with dads.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: If you're new to this podcast, really it's simple.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: It's a podcast where we interview dads, we learn about how they were raised, we learn about the life lessons that were important to them, we learn about the values that are important to them and really we learn about how we can work hard to become a better quarterback or leader of our home.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: So let's sit back, relax and listen to today's episode on the Quarterback Dadcast.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Well, hello everybody.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: It's Casey Jaycox here with Quarterback Dadcast.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: We're in season six and the guests continue to get better.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: No offense to season four or five one, two, three, four, five but it's been fun just to watch the growth of this podcast grow.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: The theme is still a consistent, a blank white piece of paper, if I can speak English, and we're going to let curiosity drive this conversation.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: And our next individual I met through the wide world of LinkedIn.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: His name is Dan Moore.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: He's the managing partner of Staffing Mastery.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: He also hosts a staffing sales summit, which I learned about.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: I actually had two clients send some of their folks there Shout out to you Ben, shout out to you Scotty and I heard great things about what they're doing.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: He and I met, did a little podcast swap, and so now we're going to turn the tables and we're going to learn about not only Dan, what he's doing at Staffing Master, which is really helping a mentor and help leaders take their game to the next level from a KPI perspective, a mindset perspective, and really just helping them improve their sales best practices in staffing.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: But that's not why we're having here.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: We're going to have you here to learn more about Dan the dad and how he's working hard to become the ultimate quarterback or leader of his household.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: So, without further ado, mr Morey, welcome to the quarterback dad cast.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: Casey man, it's an honor to be here and while I'm always excited to talk shop, I love the fact that we're going to get a chance to kind of look behind the scenes and really talk about the reason that we do all the crazy things that we do in the work world, so we can actually show up for our families.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: So good, well, we always start out each episode gratitude.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So tell me, what are you most grateful for as a dad today?
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: The thing I'm most grateful for as a dad today is having the flexibility to really use alt schooling or alternative schooling for our family, and my wife does an amazing job.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: You know curating educational experiences for my three kids and you know we both get to engage with the school program that they're a part of, which is a Montessori-based program in South Florida that they get to participate in.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: But then we get to put them in so many different programs that give them a wider range of real life experiences.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: And you know I was listening to my son who, ironically, they just had a podcast exercise in their class where he and his buddy, who is a former public school kid they actually podcasted about the differences of what is the experience of a public school middle schooler versus an old school middle schooler and what does that look like.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: And they got to chat back and forth about that and hearing their viewpoints definitely gave me pause to be grateful that we have the flexibility and we have the lifestyle that allows our kids to kind of participate in things that a lot of others won't get to.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: So I'm grateful for my wife and the work that she does and my kids getting to participate in the all-school model, because it really works for us.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: That's so cool.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: I already want to ask questions about that.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: I'm curious.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: But what I'm grateful for is just the state of my life.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: I have a freshman in college and a junior in high school and we have one that's like Ryder, my son.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: It's just crazy to see the growth he's continued to have and it's been so rewarding and fun.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: So I'm grateful for that journey he's continued to have as and it's been so rewarding and fun.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: So I'm grateful for that journey and also grateful for my daughter is, I say, a scrappy point guard, shooting guard, loves defense, and she's just starting her.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: I would thank her.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Some of her recruiting journey starting to pick up.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: She's going to visit a college tonight.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: She's going to, has a call schedule tomorrow with another college and she's like what the hell?
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: I remember like this little six-year-old doing skid outs on her bike in my part, in my drive, and now she's talking to colleges and it's like, and she's mentally ready to go.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: She's like yep, three o'clock tomorrow.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: Dad, can't wait.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: It's crazy, man.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: The days are long, the years are short, right, 100, that that is true.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Well, well, bring me inside the Maury Huddle and tell me how you and your wife met and then talk about what each child is up to these days.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, absolutely so.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: My wife and I actually met at the gym.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: She was a kind of youth and family director of a YMCA in upstate New York and I had been there and we had a mutual friend that introduced us and, yeah, I, I pursued her, she, she, she played hard to get but she finally, I'm persistent.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: I don't know if it's a sales background but I am tenacious, but yeah, we finally.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: We finally made it work and have been a crazy journey, I think, the ups and downs and the curve balls that life throws at every couple, but we've stuck it out and we've got an amazing life and kids 13, 13-year-old son, 10-year-old daughter, eight-year year old daughter.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: And again, we've been very fortunate to move around a lot.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: We do snowboard between New York and Florida, primarily living in Florida most of the year now, and that was a journey.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: That was a bit of a shock to the family because we moved here for a business reason and it's kind of a neat story where we had kind of put down some roots.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Our kids were very young in upstate New York and we were just starting to like think about starting the school journey in Montessori.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: And my employment agency had an opportunity to acquire a company in South Florida and I was like you know, it's kind of far, like I feel like we should move just six months to a year just to make sure that everything goes smooth.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: And so we did.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: We moved down here in December of 2018.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: And like, okay, this is great On a year lease and, honestly, six months in Casey, the office here didn't even need my presence.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: Like they were a well-oiled machine, great systems in place, good leadership, all that stuff.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: Like they were just they were using the system.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: And so when our lease was up in December of 2019, we were like like Florida was pretty nice, not going to lie, like the weather is amazing.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: I'm like do we really want to go back to New York in December?
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: I'm like no, we don't.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: So we asked our landlord like hey, can we just extend our lease six months and we'll go back to New York in the summer?
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: And he's like, no problem.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Well, six months later, it was June 2020 and the world looked starkly different and we had a decision to make like where do we want to ride the pandemic out?
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: Do we want to do it in South Florida?
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: Do I do an upstate New York family?
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: Like it was a lot.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: It was a hard decision to make but we finally decided like let's primarily stay in south florida.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: We did buy a different house in new york with more land and outside country and stuff, but we made the decision to stay here and ride the storm out, ride the pandemic out, and our kids put down rooms, they met friends, they got involved with programs and we built an amazing circle of friend group here.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: That it's so cool.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: All the the parents like we, they all have kids kind of like the same, you know, uh, gender and age range, so it all sort of works out with.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: All of our kids have a great group of friends but the parents all have like interesting entrepreneurial jobs.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: It's kind of amazing how we all found each other and it's been.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: It's been really cool and my kids are again a little bit of a alternative, like my son, not much of a team sport guy, you know.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: It's amazing Like I love hearing the story of your kids and kind of going that route and following in the footsteps of a dad.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: But like my kid, like my son Xander, he's parkour, it's his primary sport.
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: Like he loves parkour, loves skateboarding, loves surfing.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You know, like he's definitely a kid, that you're probably going to turn on X Games and you'll see, like the stuff that he likes.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: And you know my daughter's, like they love gymnastics.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: My middle daughter is a performer.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: You know she's been working in this, this play program for a year, almost coming up to put on a production here in a few weeks to of Annie, and it's her first time really stepping out and doing something like this.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: So it's been an amazing journey to watch her grow into this role and, amazingly, even though it was her first time doing it, like she was like so close to winning the lead, uh, and I think her lack of experience was the only thing that held her back, cause, like her raw potential and talent is there, um, so they're all different man, so that's just, I don't know.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: That's that's uh, that's our, our world and we're working on science projects right now.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: It's it's just a fun time to to be a dad in this family now.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Was mom a performer growing up or dad a performer growing up.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: Neither man.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: My wife, my wife can sing.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: She's got an amazing voice but she never really uh, I don't think she had the opportunities growing up to to really pursue that.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and she's, uh, she's.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: She's more athletic as well, but we grew up out in very rural communities with limited opportunities to really explore like alternative sports or alternative avenues, like we all had like the very basic, you know, softball, baseball, basketball, that kind of stuff.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: Um, someone was shocked to learn that my school didn't even have a football program like it.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: It was a tiny little school, right.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: So so no, neither, neither performers growing up, but I think the kids got the talent and they've got the opportunity to to explore it.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: Wow, very cool.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Now, how many is it consistent every year when you guys go back to New York, like the time of year, or is a difference never consistent?
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: Man, last, last year, last year, my kids were like we want to experience summer in Florida.
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: It's like what?
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: Like nobody wants to experience summer in Florida?
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: And they're like, no, we do, because all of our friends go to these camps and we don't get to go.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: We got to go back and we're like all right, you know, we'll do that.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: So last year we primarily stayed in Florida most of the summer.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: We went and visited a little, but we were only in New York probably maybe a few weeks in the summer and split up a little bit.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: So it's we, we truly.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: It's not a, it's not a scheduled cadence, like we kind of go when we think it makes the most.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: This year we're going to be going for a longer stretch.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: We've got some goals, we've got things we want to do, uh, in New York, so we're gonna spend more time there.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: We've got some goals, we've got things we want to do in New York, so we're going to spend more time there.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: We've made some plans already to meet up with family and friends, so we'll be there in New York longer this summer.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: But no, we make it up as we go along.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: Man, we take what life hands us and we do the best with it.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Now, were you guys always the school route you went, or were you initially public school and decided to get out?
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: So we're always the route that we went, and I was the biggest.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: I guess I was the most reluctant because, like I'm a product of public school, I didn't know anything different.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: You know, like when I was four years old, my parents stuck me on the yellow school bus and they sent me off to school and that's all I knew.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: And I again, small community, like I went K through 12, all in one building, casey, like there was literally 300 people in the building and that includes like staff and lunch, ladies, like it was a.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: It's all I knew.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: My, my, my primary education, you know bubble, was very small and I hadn't explored alternatives.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: And my wife, you know she in schooling, she got a part of her degree was like primary education, early childhood education, so she was more worldly, more knowledgeable about this.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: And she was like, hey, I really want to do homeschooling.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: You know, I think that's the path to go.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: And I was like I'm not gonna lie, man, like when I heard that, like I had the stigma, I thought a little house on the Prairie, which I've actually now been exposed to the books and all this stuff, and realized like that's actually they did pretty well.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: But I was like, I was like I don't know, like I don't want our kids to be like the socially awkward kids.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: And my wife was like what?
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: She's like, are you kidding me?
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: She's like, do you even know what homeschooling is these days.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, you know what?
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: You're right, I guess I don't.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: I guess I was making an assumption and it was an ignorant one, you know.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Um, so help me understand.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: And she started telling me about all these cool programs and she was explaining it in a way and I'm not going to lie, even still like I'm judging it off my own bias, like I think people do in their everyday lives, right, and I'm like, okay, and I'm, I'm manipulating what she's saying in my head to fit the bias or the understanding that I have of the world.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: And then she said it in a way that connected and she goes homeschooling is like the entrepreneur version of public school.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: And I was like, wait what?
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: I was like what do you mean by that?
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: Because I've always identified as a business owner, as a business entrepreneur, and like carving my own path.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I was like what do you mean by that?
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: And she goes entrepreneurs are people that typically find better ways of doing things, more efficient ways of doing things, sort of a different, new way that works best for them and maybe a certain group of people.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: And if you look at public schooling, it was built on a very production line way it was designed to kind of get to the average.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: They teach a very and again, I'm generalizing the general public school system, right, I know there's great teachers out there and there's good schools out there, but generally speaking it's the same system designed to move similar aged kids at a similar path about the average student, you know, teaching a very similar way, which is actually more auditory, and most learners are not primarily auditory, right?
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: So it's like as you're, as you start to learn this and she's like with that, like with homeschooling, you can actually learn how your kids learn and you can actually learn what they're interested in and put them in programs that spark their interests, nurture their interests, but also teach it in a way that connects with them.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: And I was like I was like, wow, I never really thought about it like that.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: So my, my son, actually started like that.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: Our entry point for my son was a Montessori program in upstate New York and it was amazing and this was my first exposure to not having similar age kids just go together in a group, like because in Montessori they do it in kind of like three-year blocks.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: So my son went in and he actually started a year after.
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: So he was kind of in the middle of lower elementary but he was in with, like kids that were a year younger than him and a year older than him.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: And there's this process of which is amazing because it actually aligns with how I teach of awareness, comprehension, mastery.
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: So when you're you come in the first year of their kind of grade group, like you're just getting aware, you're being made aware of the concepts and the work, and then, kind of in the middle, you're like getting comprehensive, you're comprehending the concepts, you're understanding it, but by the time that you're in that top tier, you're, you're learning mastery of it and you have to demonstrate that mastery by coaching the two younger generations that are not generations but ages that are in that class before you really move on.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: And I was like that makes a ton of sense to me.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: So that was my first eye-opening thing.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: And then we explored all school.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: And then we got to Florida.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: They had a lot more opportunity for all schooling features, enrichment programs, academic programs than what we had even in our little community, upstate New York.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: So yeah, and then once we met a tribe of friends that had similar beliefs and, you know, kind of want to pass for their kids.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: We just kind of stuck with it and we're still.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: Every year we're evaluating what do we want our kids to learn, what areas do we want them to, you know, improve in, what opportunities do we want to expose them to?
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: What's important to us for travel, finances, like, we look at that stuff as an entirety and then we will find the programs that best fit what we want for our kids and what we want for our family.
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: So, um, but yeah, that's, that's been our process and it's been really rewarding.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: Wow, how often, how much do your kids get involved with the program selection?
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: A ton, absolutely A ton.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, we sit them down and we talk to them and we're open with them about the financial costs of things and the trade-off to say, hey, if we do this, you know, like the, the program that, uh, this this current school year that we're in, um, it's a five day program.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: My kids actually, uh, my two older kids, go four days to one program and then we actually have them in a different program a fifth day.
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: Uh, my youngest goes, does truly homeschool with my wife on one day, three of the five days of one program and then goes to the other program with her two older siblings, but they're in, like they know, like, hey, this is what these are the pros like, this program is going to be really strong academically.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: It's going to be a little bit more rigid.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: There might be some homework, there's going to be some field trips.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: You know this is the cost associated with it, but you got to commit to it, you know.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: So if you're going to be here, you can't do these things.
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: If we're going to pay for this, we might not be able to do this right.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: Like we try to explain all of that stuff we talk about if there's going to be friends there or not friends there, what teacher styles might be, like locations, drive time, you know, transportation, yeah, we, honestly, we just expose them to all of that and then we work through the decision making process with them.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: We do give them input, but they do understand at the end of the day that you know, sarah, my wife Sarah and I have the final say.
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: But yeah, we include them, man, we want them.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: If you think about it, casey, like kids, they get so few opportunities to honestly make decisions, you know, and if, if you don't let your kids make decisions growing up and they have to learn how to make decisions as adults.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: There's a chance they might be poor decision makers and they might make some bad decisions.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: So we I, my wife and I have always believed that if we let our kids have opportunities to make decisions along the way and we give them full autonomy over some of the smaller decisions like how do you want to have your hair you know like some parents will be like no, it's got to be cut.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: No, like no, it's your hair.
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: Like you decide what, but you know, whatever they decide, they got to follow through with it.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: Like that's a big thing for us.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, no, we, we involve them in the entire process.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: We think it's an important part of learning and development.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: Uh, this is cool.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: So when you, when you talked about your growth, um, where you had to like get curious and like get out of your own way a little bit, when you like, which I love, I mean to me I think that checked the ego.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you leaned in on your vulnerability, leaned in your humility, and then you lean into your curiosity, which I think are life's superpowers.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: Those are things I teach, I look for, I'm obsessed with that.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: People know me, um, did that experience when we went through 2020 with like so much change around obviously the COVID shenanigans, but like I think, just the social unrest and diversity did that.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: Did that help that experience impact you at all?
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: Just how your mindset changed of like homeschool?
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: No, it didn't really change much with our perspective with homeschool.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: What I thought was really interesting about that is that the social awareness and adoption of homeschool changed, right, I think, even though I was fully in the camp of homeschool and looking at it as and we weren't, we weren't truly true nature homeschool because we did programs we engaged in, so it's really, I say, all school, but even still it had a stigma.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: People looked at all school as a very periphery thing and not the norm.
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: But when the pandemic happened and everybody had to figure it out, right, like homeschooling or all schooling, became more acceptable and it became like an alternative path, like, hey, maybe this is better for my kids and I think there's a lot of kids that never went back.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: You know their parents realized there was other methods of learning and it's, it's funny, even in our, in our, uh, in our group we have, you know, we were all schoolers before it happened, so like we stayed that path but we had friends that their kids came out of public school and they went along kind of the same track with our kids and they're together this year and then now they're going to go into, I would say, a private school that is like one step away from public school.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: It's very structured, you know, so they're kind of getting back to it.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: Another friend they went back into the public school system.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: We had friends that you know they came on the old school model and now they're going back to public.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: So it's, I think it opened their mind that like, hey, there's just different paths and it it really you got to find what's right for your family and your kids.
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: So I don't think it changed my, my mind too much there, because I'd already had it changed.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: And kind of the point about checking your ego, one of my favorite new phrases right now, because I love rhymes, is your ego is not your amigo is right now, because I love rhymes, is your ego is not your amigo.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: And I heard that recently and I'm like, oh, that's so good, so I do.
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: Well, that's cool, mel, I love, I love the story I'm learning.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: I'm curious.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: So to go back in time a little bit, the old flex capacitor from back to the future.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: Now I was like learning about my guests, like what was life like growing up for you and talk about the impact your parents had on you.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: Now that you're a dad, yeah, no for sure.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: Life was very different for me than it is for my kids.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: So I grew up in a working class family.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: You know my dad was a blue collar guy.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: You know he worked in a factory.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: Dad was a blue collar guy, you know he, he worked in a factory.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: My mom was an admin in a in a school.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: You know she worked in a program that was kind of catered towards guiding and supporting misguided youth, you know.
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: So she was really subject to some of the the troubled child you know troubled children in the program.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: She was just like an admin in this program, so she would see it.
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: But they were both very working class people.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: I believe I was probably 10 when they divorced and I think when that happened, because we were a working class family, like I became a bit of a latchkey kid and I think I believe that that lifestyle I didn't.
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: We didn't have much but we had enough.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: Like my brother and I.
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: We recognize that, like our parents, you know they worked very hard.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: There was never a doubt that they, that they didn't love us Right, like we knew right, and they did their best to provide for us and I think you know, looking back on it, I have a greater appreciation for the lessons that they instilled upon us.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: You know about, obviously, hard work.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: You know and following through and and setting your own standard.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: You know and like weird stuff my dad used to say sticks with me.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: Like the only place you start at the top is when you're digging a hole.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: Um, like that stuff hits.
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: Now I'm like I didn't get it, then you know.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: but wise man, yeah, you know, and it's like you hear this stuff.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: So, but I think they inherently I don't think intentionally, but inherently they taught us gratitude.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: You know, my a lesson that that my mom taught me a long time ago.
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: We were doing this can drive man, and I'll never forget this.
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: I was probably gosh.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: I was probably somewhere between eight and 11 years old.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: We're doing this can drive for the scouts, and I lived out in the country.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: This isn't like in city living where you can go hit up a building and hit, like you know, 30 doors in 10 minutes, like I had to walk to get door to door to solicit cans and go collect these.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: And I'll never forget my mom has taken me and, I think, my brother with us, with us as well, and maybe one of our other scouting friends, and we're walking, and we're walking from door to door, not in the country.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: It is hundreds of yards between doors, you know, sometimes I'm up to a mile.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: It gets a long way and, as you're a kid, you're like, oh my god, this is awful, why are we doing?
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna die.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: My feet hurt.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah right, I'm like coming up with every single excuse to try to get out of this and cut it short.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: And what do we see, man?
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: We see another group of kids from the same uh pack of Cub Scouts and their dad is driving them in a truck and they're all sitting in the back of the truck and they're all having fun and they're just driving Right.
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: And I'm just like I was like why can't we drive, like, why can't we do that Right?
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: And in my mind I'm thinking that would be way more efficient was get.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: We'd get done the quicker.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: And my mom said this thing to me and it stuck with me.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: Even today.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: I'm like it stuck with me.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: She goes it's not what you give, it's what you sacrifice.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: I was like and in the moment it didn't really hit me and I'm honestly man, I'm getting goosebumps just thinking about what this actually means, because over the years she would say it again.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: That was the first time she said.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like what the hell does that mean?
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Like it's not what you give it's what you sacrifice and I, over the years she started to connect that to me that, like, some people can give, and if they give from a place of abundance and it doesn't really impact them, then it might not be that meaningful.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: But if somebody gives something and it's actually a sacrifice for them, the gift is more meaningful.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: And I'll, and just to, I'll, drive this point home and this is a kind of to put the pin in the question my brother and I we were, you know again, little kids and it was right around christmas time.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: Right, it was right after christmas, I think.
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: Maybe a day or two after Christmas and we had heard the story.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Our mother told us a story about a nearby family that their house burned and they lost everything.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Right, kids like just lost all their toys, like the thank God the family was safe, but they lost everything just a couple of days after Christmas.
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: And we were thinking can you imagine what that would be like?
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: You know, christmas, you're so excited as a kid, you're getting all your toys.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: You're still two days removed, like everything is still kind of new, you're still loving everything you know, and then it's all gone, right, it's like holy cow.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: So my mom was doing like a toy drive and like asking like, hey, you know, are there any old toys that you guys you know maybe just replaced or you don't use anymore because you got this new stuff?
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: Is there any toys that you would like to give to these kids?
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: And I kid you not, and in the moment I didn't think about this, but as I look back I'm like this was the lesson that she had been instilling in me.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: My brother and I each gave our favorite toys.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: His was an airwolf helicopter model this is going to be dating and mine was actually it's kind of goofy to say this but it was this old toy called Elfie and it was like a robot that you could put these cards in and there was buttons and like it was kind of educational and like it was nerdy, because like I'm a nerd.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: But we gave these and my mom was like wait, these are your guys' favorite toys.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: She's like we've got all these other toys.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: Like like, why don't you?
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: And they're like no, and like this is what we wanted to give, because we knew how much those toys meant to us and we felt what those kids must be feeling, you know, not having anything, and we wanted to give them something that to use a today term that would move the needle, that would have an impact.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: So we each gave our favorite toy, not out of coercion but because that's the feeling that we wanted these kids to have in the wake of losing everything.
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: And in that moment it was like my mom must've been, like super proud mom, thinking okay, it's not what you give, it's what you sacrifice.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: And so, yeah, that's.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Those are just some of the lessons that you know I try to impart on my kids and they give me the same eye roll that I'm sure that I gave my parents back in the day and I hope that it sticks.
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: I hope that they show a level of appreciation for this old man wisdom someday.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: And it is, it's working.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: I was actually just in a parent-teacher conference this morning.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: My wife and I went down to meet with the teachers that kind of manage the Friday program for my son and just hearing his progress on like math and reading and all this stuff.
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: And you know they were talking about like a specific relationship with one of his kind of friends there and it sometimes gets tense and you know and like they were talking about how my son navigates through that and then how he did something that seemed like in the moment seemed a little bit uh, his teacher was trying to help him with a problem and my son was like I know, I know, I know, I got it.
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: It was like very short and like a little bit disrespectful and the teacher was like, okay, he needs some space and back off.
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: But later that day my son actually went back and was like hey, you know what I I'm sorry, that was rude and unprompted, unsolicited.
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: So like my wife and I were like cause you don't get to see that stuff as parents, right, like you, you preach it and you don't see it at the house, but like to know that it's sticking makes a difference.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: So I feel like maybe some of those lessons that my wife and I learned as kids from our parents that we're imparting, maybe they're starting to take shape, but yeah, that's some of the early day stuff there.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: Well, not only did she you guys learn hard work, follow through gratitude, but I think you also learn empathy.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: That was the biggest word.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: I wrote down that story, yeah, I mean have an empathy for others.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: And and I found even like so I'm almost 50 and I think stories I always tell, even like my business stuff.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: I always tell I tell clients story, sell slides, don't.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: That same mindset for kids.
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: It's like if you're going to, if you're going to tell my, if I want to teach my kids a lesson, or if I want to tell a client, hey, what to do, I always say, tell me, would it be helpful if I shared a story around when I experienced that.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: So then you lead with your own kind of like, hey, I'm going first, let me tell you where I sucked.
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: So then they and I find that they're much more ready to learn it.
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: So like you, you, you beat me too, cause I was going to ask.
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: I'm like God, I hope you're telling your kids these stories.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh, they've heard it.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: They've.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: They've heard a lot of the kids stories and like, oh, I wish I could have grown up in the eighties.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: I'm like you know, I only tell you the highlight reels.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of things about growing up in the eighties that aren to disney world is the first time I went to disney world, okay, and you did it at four months and I don't know how old I was.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: I was 32, right.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: So like you.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: So, but yeah, I do I tell the stories and I try to you know, let them know that you know, I was a kid once and I can relate.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: I've been on the journey and, um, sometimes they get it and sometimes I get the eye roll, but it's all good.
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's um.
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: You know, we, when we grew up, we didn't grow up, we were middle class, and so our vacations were camping, I love yeah yeah, I love camp bikes and the.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: You know you get in the camper and like I'm talking the old school camper with that, like the two poles that came down the back of the chevy to kind of yeah, yeah, you have the over the top thing.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if people know I'm talking at home there's like imagine a bed on top of the camper where I'm driving I'm, I'm like, I'm like a pilot, I'm seeing the.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know.
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: So not safe.
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: No, not safe.
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: You would not, would not be tolerated today.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: So I'm aware of those.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: My rich friends and growing up had those I had.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: We had a tent.
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: I was one of your rich friends.
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're on my.
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: You could have was one of your rich friends.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you could have been one of my rich friends, man, that would have been cool.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: That's funny.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: Are mom and dad still with us?
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: So my mom is, my mom is.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: Unfortunately, my dad passed away gosh 22 years ago.
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he did not win the fight with cancer, man, it got him and but still, even to his very last breath, was imparting wisdom and lessons on me about you know not, not succumbing to societal norms and not just you know going along, because that's what people say you should do, or it seems right, like you know, just finding your own way in the world and making your mark on the world.
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Um, but freaking hate cancer f you can't man it sucks, but you know what, even when I was hating it and even when I was bashing it and all of that stuff, and it lit I, I kid you, not like the day before he took his final breath, like he was like listen, stop.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: He's like, stop being so depressed and sad that I'm leaving, he's like.
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: And when I leave, when I'm gone, he's like stop being so depressed and sad that I'm leaving, he's like.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: And when I leave, when I'm gone, he's like do not be sad that I'm gone, celebrate that I was here.
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: He's like remember that I was here, do not?
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: He's like if you spend time any time being sad because I passed, you'll have missed the mark.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: And I'm like what do you mean by that?
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: He's just like.
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: He's like listen, life, it's fleeting.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: We all know it's going to end.
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: This is no surprise.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: It's a surprise when it comes.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: But you never had, it's never guaranteed.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: We're up, but the death is because it's all of it.
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: It's always going to end and if you focus on being sad over the ending and you miss the point of being happy and joyous and celebrating the fact that it existed in the first place and all of the good stuff that happened, is like you're focusing on the wrong part.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: So don't be sad that I'm leaving, be happy that I was here, and what do you think that that's?
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: That's some wise stuff, man.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: I mean, where do you think that came from?
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: For him, bro?
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: My dad was.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: My dad was a broken man and had a hard life.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: He actually, uh, he was one of eight kids.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: Uh, obviously he was born in the fifties, you know.
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: So he grew up at kind of a some turbulent times in the United States.
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: It's like generations were changing and clashing and all that stuff, and like people were trying to figure out who they were.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: But at eight years old, he probably had the most transformational thing as an entire life happened to him and he decided this was the day that he was not going to come right home after school, that he was going to stay out and play with friends, even though he was supposed to go home after school and he had every other time.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: This was the day that he stayed late and did not go right home and by the time he made it home, he found his mom passed away of a heart attack on the floor and even though he was eight and even though everyone was like, listen, like even if you would have got home on time, it wouldn't matter.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: He never, he never relinquished that um, that guilt.
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: He never let himself off the hook, for he carried that with him his entire life and I think, I think in that moment, because he understood and he learned over over time that life is not guaranteed, that you can go anytime, you know, and I think he learned a greater appreciation and gratitude for it, and even though he carried that guilt with him and there was nothing anybody could do or say to get him to release it, I think he used it in a lot of ways to feel that wisdom and then maybe almost try to tell people to not feel the anguish that he probably carried with him his entire life, because he probably hated how it made him feel and he likely didn't want anyone else to feel that way.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: So he's like don't carry sadness or, you know, don't mourn my passing.
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: You know, be happy.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: And he was always a happy-go-lucky guy, like this dude was.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: You know, full of life, full of energy, could brighten any room, you know.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: But so I think it probably came out of life.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Full of energy could brighten any room, you know, but I think it probably came out of the despair of his own childhood.
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: Wow, seems like he was in the wrong job.
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: Bro, shouldn't have been in the factory, should have been selling stuff.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: Man, he would have been good at it.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: He, he.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: I swear the gift of gab is the gift from my dad and he.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: But you know what, though, the thing is, is he had an opportunity, like he was a builder, he was a craftsman, like he actually had an amazing opportunity to go live a dream and go build, do carpentry over in Australia, like to do a crew for a year.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: But he and my mom had just met and my brother I don't know if my brother had just been born or was like on the way, I'm not sure exactly the timeline of that, but he had this option Do I go do this thing or do I stay on and put down roots and support a family?
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: And at the time, you know, in a small town community, the biggest employer was a, was a factory and they were paying the best they were, they were growing, so they were looking for so the job.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: That was easy to get the job.
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: And then, once you get in, you get hooked, you know, and so he was.
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: He was 100 in in the wrong career and he made the decision purely out of the obligation to to to provide a stable income for his family and um, but yeah, he I'm glad.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: I'm glad that he didn't, because probably if you went a different way, I wouldn't be here.
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: But at the same time I think I'd make that sacrifice because I think that he could have had a much different and healthier life and but who knows, you know, life is, we get what we get, man, you know.
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: So everything else is speculation.
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Betsy Robinson, ceo of Tier 4 Group, a women owned and diversity certified technology recruiting and executive search firm that connects exceptional talent with extraordinary companies in 43 states across the US.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: At Tier 4 Group, relationships are at the heart of everything we do, whether it's with our clients, our candidates, our vendor partners or with each other.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: Our mission is to go beyond transactions and create long-lasting partnerships.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: We don't just help companies find talent, we help them find the right talent, and that starts with truly understanding our clients and candidates.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: It's not just about filling roles.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: It's about fostering success for the long-term.
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: This is the recipe for success that's landed us on the Inc 5000 six consecutive years and has us outpacing our competition across the country, and I'm thrilled to support Casey Jay Cox's podcast.
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: Casey's philosophy aligns perfectly with ours prioritizing relationships over transactions.
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: His insights on building trust, empathy and connection resonate deeply with the way we do business at Tier 4 Group.
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: We were honored to have Casey as our keynote at our 2024 kickoff, and all of our new hires read his book Win the Relationship, not the Deal, when they start here with us.
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: So if you're looking for a partner who values relationships as much as results, visit us at tier4groupcom or connect with me, betsy Robinson, directly on LinkedIn and, while you're at it, keep tuning into Casey's podcast.
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: You'll walk away inspired to strengthen your own relationships, both personally and professionally, and, as Casey always says, stay curious.
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: Does your brother have kids?
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: He does, yeah, he's got one kid.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: My, your brother have kids?
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: He does, yeah, he's got one kid.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: My nephew is 19.
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, and do you ever reflect on the conversation you and I have had today?
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: Do you and your brother ever reflect on the impact?
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: Like we've been talking about today?
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: Not as often as we probably should.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: I think that, um, my brother and I and I love him dearly and if, like, he needed anything, like I've got his back we're very different people.
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: We've we've gone on our lives, have gone on very different trajectories.
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: Um, he's uh, and I don't know, some would probably say we're envious of each other because he's got this ability to be very content.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: You know, he's like, hey, I've built this life.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: He's very happy, he's very content.
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: Um, for me, I've I don't know if it's a gift or a curse, but I'm very driven onto the next thing and build and grow, and build and grow.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: Um, and you know, I think that sometimes he's like I'm envious because you've accomplished these things, but the other side, he and you know, I think that sometimes he's like I'm envious because you've accomplished these things, but the other side, he's like you know what, like you've had to do a lot of stuff that I didn't have to do, you know, and I'm envious, going like man.
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: It would be awesome to just be like I'm content with my life, like this is cool, because sometimes I'm always like what's the next thing and that's a.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: That's a character flaw of mine, but no, we don't actually get to reflect probably as often as we'd like and I think since we've we've moved away, we see each other even less.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: You know, we only see each other a couple of times a year.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: But, yeah, we're we're, we're not as tight.
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: I think he plugs in more to his friends and I plug in more to my friends.
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: But he's a good dude.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: You'll never find a dude that that works harder and and works harder and cares more for his family and doing the right thing and just having fun and being content.
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: Honestly, when I look at it, it's like this is my dad, which is kind of a spitting image of him.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: They were thick as thieves.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: These two, my brother and my dad, were like best friends and it shows so he's a fun guy that likes having fun and living his life on his terms and terms and and being completely content with things.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: So, um, yeah, he's a good dude.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that speaks to me a little bit.
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: I, you know, I, I think leaving corporate after 22 years ish.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: And then this entrepreneurial journey that found me that I did not mean to do it's, I'm not content, I'm just a lot more present with it.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: And I wasn't.
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: I mean, I was very present as a dad when my kids were young, when I was at K-Force, but I just it's like another level of being present now.
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, where I value, I just put a lot more high value on family moments or time with my kids, because my kids are.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: I got one in college and one that's going to be out in a year, so there's a lot of times if, like, if I have an opportunity to do something with my daughter or my son I hate to say it clients I might move you.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I can, because I'm the boss.
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: And if, if that works and I'm not very respectful about how I do it, but, like to me, I'm like these opportunities are not going to be there always.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: Now, there's some days I can't, but like, yeah, I don't know.
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: No, I'm the same way and that's that's that's what I prioritize, you know.
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: And when I mentioned things like building and driving, it's like the family plan, you know, and it sounds crazy, but like my wife and I think about like, okay, what?
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: Like kids, like we want them to, you know, start a little further than we did.
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: So like, okay, we buy real estate, like that will help them out, like they might not have to buy a house when they get you know of age, or if they don't like the house, like they can sell it.
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: And you know, like it my people, they know that I prioritize family and events over all else.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: And I it just happened earlier today I actually I was my wife and I were having an amazing conversation with my son's teachers and like the meeting went long.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: I just text a guy that I was having on staffing monthly and I'm like hey, you know, parent teacher meeting went long.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: You know, can we bump 30 minutes?
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: And he responded.
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: He responded back.
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: He's like you know what, man, absolutely.
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: Because, like, that's the stuff you should be focused on.
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: He's like these moments, like you just said, casey, these moments are fleeting.
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: And he's like so, no, you should absolutely prioritize that.
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: And in that moment I realized these are the people I surround myself with my clients.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: They think the same way, they prioritize the same thing.
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: So they don't care if I bump them for family.
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: The people I interview on staffing monthly, the people I choose to give my time to, like you like, like, we understand this, if I and I think I had to bump this one, we actually we were scheduled a different time and I actually had to bump because I picked up a carpool, you know, for my family.
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: So, like I, I will, I'm I'm routinely playing not necessarily routinely, but occasionally playing calendar, jenga or Tetris, um, because family stuff comes up and you got to prioritize it because it is fleeting and, frankly, if not for that, the work stuff, it's pointless Gold, my man, I love it.
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: Um, if you were to pick on yourself, um, or or like you're you're watching film with your dad game, you said man, dan, this is an area I'm talking to yourself in the third person Dan you need, we need to work on this as a dad, because we know this is not where you want to be.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: But let's be honest with ourself and we're going to commit to being better at this as a dad, and I can lead you.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: First, mine was always patience.
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: I've become way more patient ever since doing this podcast six years ago.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: Now, some might disagree I think I've become more patient, but tell me what scenario your dad game that you're still working hard to become that better leader quarterback your home.
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: I love that question.
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: I I think for me, um, to be more curious, discerning and understanding of the unique and different needs of each person in the household.
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: You know, sometimes we interact with people and we assume that they view the world through the same lens that we do, or that they have the same bias as we do, but they don't, because they've had different life experiences, they've got different emotional baggage.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: We do, but they don't, because they've had different life experiences, they've got different emotional baggage and um, but because we assume that we think that what they need is what we would want in their particular situation.
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: So that's what we give them and and we missed the mark sometimes and it can leave people unheard frustrated, you know, uh, invalidated, and I think sometimes being able to step back and just trying to understand, like frustrated, you know, invalidated, and I think, sometimes being able to step back and just trying to understand, like, okay, what is it that they need?
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: And if I can't figure it out, being, you know, humble enough to ask it in a way that shows sincere desire to learn and not just check a box, you know, and what my wife might need day to day could be very different than what my son needs or my daughters.
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: You know, they're all different personalities, different life experiences.
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: And, to kind of drive this home, this just happened a couple of days ago.
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: I was my son and he's work.
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: He's got a science project.
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: The final demonstration is coming up in a week or so and he, he, I feel like, took on a little bit of an ambitious project and that's a something he gets from me like he dreams the world and then tries to make it be um, but he was like he's, like I want to figure out how to pedal a bike and create enough power to play a nintendo switch for 10, right, and it's not super ambitious of a project.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: But for him that's kind of a thing and like his classmates didn't really kind of go like piecing together power systems and figuring out how to do this.
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: So I'm a systems guy, you know this.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: So I'm like, okay, well, this is what we need to do.
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: We need to think about what are all the pieces of your system.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: And I let him do the research and figure out what needed to be.
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, well, we have to convert this into watt hours because you need to figure, we need to, like, create a common denominator how many watt hours do you need to power the switch?
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: How many watt hours do you need to power the, the docking station that will charge the switch?
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: How many watt hours to power the monitor that you want to display it, on and so on and so forth.
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: And so I literally created a worksheet and I gave it to him.
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: I was like, here's the math.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: I showed him the formulas and I explained it to him.
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: And I get to the end and he's like well, I said, what do you want me to do?
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: And I was like just do the math.
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: He's like what math?
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: And, casey, in my mind, I'm like I just explained the math to you.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: What do you mean?
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: What template?
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: So I go back to the lab, right, and I create step-by-step instructions.
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: You know, go look at, you know the amps on this and look at you know the time that you want to do and do, like, do the formula, and I spell everything out step-by-step, literally like line-by-line instructions on exactly what to do for every piece of the system.
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: He's like, okay, and I, I covered this with him and he's like, well, he's like I'm not getting it.
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: What, what do you want me to do?
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: And I'm like the math and I'm getting a little bit frustrated.
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: And I could tell he's getting frustrated and about to check out.
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, and I take a step back and I realized this, this lesson that I'm trying to learn, and this is an example of like, a little bit of progress.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: But I'm like, okay, he's got a different need than I would have in this moment For me.
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: Like I would get it, I would see the temple, I would see the instructions and I would be able to follow this.
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: But for some reason he's got a different need.
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: So I just asked him.
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: I took a step back and I asked a question curiosity, right, like the theme of your show.
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, I was like what is it that you hear?
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: Like what is going on in your mind?
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: When I'm explaining, when I'm talking to you, what's going on in your head?
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: Because I sense you're frustrated.
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: It's starting to make me frustrated.
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: Neither one of us want to be frustrated.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: We both want to have fun doing this.
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: And he goes when you're talking to me, I'm just trying to visualize everything and I can't visualize it.
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: And I'm like visual learner.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: I knew that, I knew this about him, but I didn't apply it to this situation and that was a need that he had and I was meeting it in a different way that I thought was satisfactory.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: We flipped it over blank piece of paper and we just drew out the entire system.
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: And I drew out, I put the same formulas, just in a diagram form showing the circuit.
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: I was like I just need you to fill in these blanks.
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: He's like like oh, this makes complete sense to me, and like that.
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: And he knew all the answers new power flow and like electricity yield through each part of the system.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: And he got it because I drew it for him and that was a need that he had, that had I'd not taken a step back to try to figure that out.
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: So that's, that's my dad QB, like game tape.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: I need to.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: I need to do a better job of taking a step back and trying to understand the individual needs of the different people in my household and meet them where they're at versus where I think they should be, based on my own biases and lens that I see the world.
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: If it makes your son feel better, I wouldn't have followed it either.
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: I'm a visual learner and I dude, I dude, I.
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: I'm like the least handiest person united states history, but I'm a great, I'm a hard worker and and I, once I see what we're doing, then I, yeah, now I know what we're supposed to do.
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: I just don't have the mind to go like, hey, we're gonna build this like um a-frame awning extended off our roof, that's gonna do this.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: I'm like, no, we're not, that's gonna immediately fall down my son can figure that out.
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: Man, my son has got like, and all my kids are just says we're on the top of my son, like they all got these unique gifts.
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: But him visually like this and I know this about him like casey, he would go to sleep at night and he'd wake up first thing in the morning and he'd be like I gotta go build this thing.
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: I dreamt about this thing and I got to go build it with Legos and it would be like a Kingfisher bird, right.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: It would be like something where there's not a Lego set for it.
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: It would be like a manatee, right, and he would go and he'd be in his room and he'd clickety, clack and he'd come out and he would have like a replica to scale manatee or a Kingfisher bird or whatever.
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: I'm like man, like how do you do that?
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: He's like I just see it in my head and then I put the pieces together, right, and it's like that's that's how he is right.
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: My, my, my daughter, my middle daughter, is a little bit more verbal.
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: Like she needs like to to read, but then also like hear the words, right, and which also to me it's like maybe that's why, like, she's so good at like performing and singing, like maybe that's where that.
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: I don't know how that ties in, but so yeah, it's, it's a journey man, it really is, and I think that the more that we learn about the others that we care about in our lives, I think the more that we learn about ourselves, and it gives us an opportunity to grow and become better, more well-rounded people.
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: Well, I think, whether we're dads or husbands or partners or leaders, you got to meet people where they are and if you don't meet people where they are with curiosity.
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: You're, it's your.
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: To me it's a recipe for disaster and frustration Cause like.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: One of the things I learned about my journey of life is like the difference between expectations and agreements.
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: Expectations usually sit in my head and then I assume that you're a mind reader, which no one is.
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: I'd be guessing people's way at the fair if I did that.
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: But an agreement is hey, are we clear about what the expectation is?
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Maybe have some kind of written email back and forth.
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: Same thing with the kids hey, my expectation is you're going to get the dishwasher unloaded by 4 o'clock.
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: We have an agreement.
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: Or like with Riley, my daughter, like recently.
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: I just said hon, I know we talked about.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: I said first ask question.
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: I go do you remember what we talked about before you leave your room in the morning.
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: He said not a big deal, but it is a big deal to me.
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: I said we, we agreed that when you leave your room you're gonna open up your blind, you're gonna make your bed every day.
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: That's my expectation for you to live here.
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: Do we have an agreement?
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: And dude, the last two days, when I come upstairs, like, like for a break during work, I'm like I love it and I think sometimes it's like you know, um, she's don't.
• 50:32
  Speaker 1: You know now the difference between recognition and appreciation.
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: Recognition, she's not going to get a, hey, we're going to get blizzards.
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: Hey, you're going to get a jelly the month club.
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: But I can say, hey, hon, I really appreciate you falling through on that.
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: Like that's appreciation which takes five seconds of time, that we as parents can do, we as leaders can do, but sometimes we just don't think about it because we're going way too fast.
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, yeah, I love that man, I'm going to take that away.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: Like that distinction between expectation and agreement, I think that's a powerful one and it ties so well with a statement that I tell pretty much anyone I talk to that all stress in life is caused when expectations don't match reality.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: And if you think about it, if you think about every time you're stressed out and you're like good or bad, it's because there is a difference between expectations and reality.
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: And I think, in a sense of negative stress, if we have expectations and not an agreement and then reality shows out and it's different from the expectations we had, it creates stress, whereas an agreement could have, could have bridged that gap before that negative stress as a chance to actually kind of toxify our life.
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: So I love that.
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing that.
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: Well, thank you for saying that, because now you just get so.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: I've been doing these Friday videos or last like six weeks or so, five weeks or so, and a lot of it was changed.
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: This is like kind of like back to the LinkedIn world of work.
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: I was working with a client and they were like too nervous to do it.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: I was like, listen, I'll do a video with you.
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: We're going to we video.
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: People appreciate that's the way you can build a relationship with somebody to show, show what you're up to, whatever.
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: And I said you, show what you're up to whatever.
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: And I said you, either we either can be comfortable on the sidelines or we're going to be uncomfortable in the game and the only way you learn is by throwing interceptions missing that putt falling off your bike, like, let's listen, I'll go first.
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: I'm going to tag you, so you're going to do it, I'm going to do it.
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: It might not be perfect, but who cares?
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: But I'm going to my video this week that we're in April, everybody.
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: This video is going to be on expectations versus agreements, so I'll make sure I tag you as inspiration.
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: Okay, before we get into some of the work you're doing, because I want to make sure people learn about staffing mastery, if you were to summarize everything we've talked about, that a dad can take away, like maybe two or three actionable themes that they can maybe reevaluate their life or their mindset to be maybe a different or better or just a different, maybe leader in their home that might drive some more positive results.
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: Based on our conversation today, tell me what comes to mind.
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: I would say, first and foremost, I think it's important for dads to understand that you know the title of dad you know and husband are you know the top one or two titles that you'll ever have in your life, and I think you need to treat it with that level of respect and I think that you need to think about if you're a process system person, like I am and you, you have a high level, of high standard and you like accountability, like.
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: Think about the term dad, like a job description, and look in the mirror.
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: Don't be afraid to look in the mirror and say, hey, am I, am I doing the job, not just checking the box, but I'm excelling at the job, and then actually, you know, define like, what do you want to be as a dad?
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: And then you would use some of those things that we talked about that are those little tools that help you get better as a dad.
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: Be present, prioritize it.
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: You know, don't, don't, and even be thinking about how you engage with your kids.
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: You know, like be present, put the phone down and show them that you're focusing on them.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: You know, like those little nuanced things like be present, be actively present as a verb, be present in their lives, be present in the household, lead that household, lead by example.
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: You know, and I think doing those little things, like you know, setting the expectation and agreement, like I think that is so huge.
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: Teach those life lessons that might seem cliche to you, but it's not what you give, it's what you sacrifice.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: Like those are the core values being instilled in your kids and you can't teach them too much.
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: You know this is not core values, are not shaped in one and done statements.
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: You know they're.
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: They're, I guess, exhibited every single day.
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: So I think the biggest takeaway for me is just be present, prioritize this, because I guarantee, once this phase of your life passes, you're going to wish you were back.
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: You're going to wish you could have it back, and so do the best you can this time.
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: Love it, dude.
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: That's some gold, okay, so if people want to learn more about staffing mastery, they want to learn more about the staffing sales summit.
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: If they're in the staffing industry, they're an executive, they're a leader, they're a seller, tell me why do they want to learn about this?
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: And then where can they learn about this?
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so do the quick blurb on Staffing Mastery.
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: Staffing Mastery is just my overarching consultancy.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: So if you're in the staffing industry and you're looking for peers that you want to share the journey with and you want to learn systems or learn how to kind of better scale your company, that's really what I do with Staffing Mastery.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: If you really want to focus on sales improvement from a sales leadership or sales producer level, that's why we created the Staffing Sales Summit.
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: There's a massive need, casey, if you think about it, last year was the first year in a really long time that the industry flagged sales as the biggest challenge, and it was more than 10 years ago, back to the Great Recession, the last time that it was flagged as the biggest challenge.
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: Right, and it was more than 10 years ago, back to the great recession, the last time that it was flagged as the greatest challenge and that period of time.
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: Some of your best producers have moved on, they've moved up the ladder, they're no longer there and the people that you have in the trenches selling today, they don't know, they are not equipped to meet the moment the way that they need to.
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: So I saw this.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: It was a need that I honestly, I wanted to have solved.
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: I had that same challenge.
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: I'm like where do you go to a conference to get trained up at scale with actionable insights?
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: And I go to all the conferences and I love them.
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: They're amazing for what they are.
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: But anytime any conference puts a sales topic on there, it's usually one block on the agenda, high level topic, and you usually leave the session thinking, okay, that's great, I'm excited, but what do I do with it?
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: Right, and then when you go back, because you don't have an answer to that, you do nothing and it became a waste of time and aspirational at best, and I just I don't like that.
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: I want people to have meaningful impact or meaningful change in their lives, because I told you, I came from a working class family man Staffing this industry.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: It has given me a life beyond what I possibly could have dreamed of as a kid.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: The life that my wife and I have, and our kids.
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: It would not be possible without the staffing industry.
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: So I am grateful for it and I want other people to be able to benefit from it the way that I have.
• 57:02
  Speaker 1: So we created the summit, staffing Sales Summit.
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: We've had it two years in a row now, in February in Orlando.
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: We are going to have another one in February 2026 in Orlando at Margaritaville.
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: If you want to check it out, google Staffing Sales Summit you can go to the RSVP page.
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: If you got show notes, I'll give you a link.
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: They can just click on it and you can get signed up.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: You'll be notified when tickets open up.
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: It will sell out.
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: It sold out the last two years.
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: It will sell out.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: Tickets are capped at 120.
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: But if you want to get a flavor for it, if you're like, hey, you know, I want to see what this thing is about without actually making the commitment to buy a ticket, we're actually having an encore event that's free to attend.
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: We're bringing back four of the speakers from this past Staffing Sales Summit Joey Frampas from Butler Street, mark Winter from Winsource, mike Bradbury from Type Marketing and Alexis Meske from Aura Marketing, and they're going to be covering four really important topics, with Mike and Alexis talking about social selling how do you improve your reputation online.
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: And then how do you improve your reach so you can get more people to see that reputation that you're an expert.
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: And then also with Mark Winter talking about sales enablement how do you actually start to weave marketing and sales together?
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: Because if you're doing sales in a silo, you're going to fail.
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: This time it's not going to work the same way that it used to.
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: And then Joey Framp is kind of hitting the leadership track, talking about how do you actually intertwine leadership with producers, with technology and process, and how do you make sense of this crazy changing world today as a leader.
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: So we're bringing that back.
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: That's actually going to be June 17th Again.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: We'll get links out for that for people to see.
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: So if you want to see what it's like but I guess my quick and dirty summary on it is if you feel like you want your sales operation improved in your staffing business, regardless if it's a producer level issue or a leadership level issue or an ownership level issue you can go to the summit, you can get the absolute best sales content.
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: Everything is required to provide actionable insights.
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: They do not get on my agenda unless I know what the actionable insights are the deliverables that you're going to get and you're going to be able to leave this event with something that you can implement and see positive results.
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: That's not just me saying it.
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: Two years in a row, on a five out of five scale, our actionability hit 4.8.
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: Our speakers level of engagement and connectivity was 4.7.
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: So I mean we're ranking really, really high on this piece of it and our NPS score is 100.
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: On the event, every single person that attended said they would recommend it to a friend.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: We had people that brought teams that said man, the entire investment to get my team there is already paid for itself with the stuff we learned and implemented.
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: So if you're looking to grow and scale and you think you need to improve your sales to do that, the summit is the only event to be out there for and that's why we created it, because we want companies to win and succeed.
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: So cool dude, love it.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, make sure we will link that in the show notes when this episode comes out If people want to follow you.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: Linkedin, I'm sure, is a great spot.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: Are there any other social channels that you're on?
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: So the only two that I'll ask is please connect with me on LinkedIn, follow me.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: I put out a lot of content around this.
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: If you like the idea of sales and strategy and metrics and KPIs and you're a data geek like me, or you like the art of sales, follow me on LinkedIn.
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 1: Connect with me.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: Shoot me a message, say hey, I heard you on Casey's show.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: That would be super cool.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: The other one I would be grateful if you would go to our YouTube channel for staffing monthly at staffing monthly on YouTube and subscribe to the channel If you like this kind of content where you get thought leaders just talking about actionable concepts that's what we do every month in Staffing Monthly and go check out the show and subscribe on YouTube.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: That would be amazing.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: I will make sure those are both linked in the show notes.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: It is now time, dan, to go into what I call the lightning round.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: This is where I show you the negative hits of taking too many hits in college not bong hits, but football hits.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: Your job is to answer these questions as quickly as you can, and my job is to try to get a giggle out of you.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: Okay, that's pretty easy, I laugh a lot.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: Okay, true or false.
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: Your favorite NFL team is the Miami Dolphins False, false.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, if you were to.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: If we were to revisit your childhood and look at your most prized possession of, like a system you built it's the flex capacitor.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 1: False, that would have been pretty cool.
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: If it was true, though, it would have been cool.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: That would have been cool.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: Um, favorite movie of all time.
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: Oh wait, this is not true or false.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: I thought you're gonna listen.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: I shook you up.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: What is?
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: What is your favorite movie of all time?
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: Oh, man, I.
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: I suck at this because I like so many different things.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: Uh, I really like gladiator.
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: I love, remember the titans.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: Um, man, I.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: How?
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: About comedy, my favorite comedy?
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, jeez.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: I love comedy movies, but I can't.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: Elf, maybe I love the movie elf with will ferrell.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: I think he's hilarious.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: I uh, yeah, I don't know, I like that.
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: Uh, the Wilson brothers those guys are funny.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: And even Jason Bateman I think he's hilarious.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: His sense of humor, um, yeah, I don't know.
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: I love movies in general, man, so it's so hard for me to pick a favorite.
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 1: Tell me the last book you read Buy Back your Time by Dan Martell.
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, if I came to your house for dinner tonight, tell me what you and Sarah would make me.
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: Okay, if I came to your house for dinner tonight, tell me what you and.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: Sarah would make me.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: Oh man, uh, that's a great question actually, because I am working on a science project tonight, so I just asked my wife earlier today, uh, to take over uh food duties, and I believe we're gonna be on trauma taco Tuesday.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: There we go which means I'll still be making my guac because I make a killer guac.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: Oh that sounds, that sounds yummy.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: I love good guac.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: If there was to be a book written about your life, tell me the title.
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I don't know.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: I would basically say the way to systematize your life, to enjoy the life you want.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: I don't know, I got nothing on that one man.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: Why don't we shorten it?
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: We'll call it the power of systemization.
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 1: I want to say that, man, but honestly, the reality is just like it'd be more like figuring out how to live the life you want there we go.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: That's the title.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: That really is, because at the center of everything I do is like okay, how is this going to impact me getting the way that I want to my family plan, the plan we have?
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: So I think it's just figuring out how to live the life you want.
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: There we go.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: We can't see.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: We came to it together.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: Now, dan, you, you're going to be shocked that as quickly as we just came up with that title, it's sold out, no-transcript.
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: Going to star Dan Mori in this critically acclaimed, hit new movie on Netflix?
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: Gosh, oh man, um, who would star me?
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: You know, I I honestly think that the mood that I'm in right now, I feel like it would probably be like a Jason Bateman guy.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: I feel like I don't know.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 1: That's a really good question.
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: I don't see, I don't.
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: It's hard for me to actually conceptualize like who would play me when I think about these people that we put on pedestals, right?
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: Do you know who?
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: I would have said my guess.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: If I would have guessed you, I would have said Matt Damon.
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 1: You kind of got a little Matt Damon, look.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: So I, he was the first one that came to my mind and I was like I'm like, is it?
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: Is it because I think that?
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: Or is it because I literally have recency bias because I just rewatched Ford versus Ferrari, but I was thinking that it was the first one that came to mind.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I think that's because I just watched that movie, so maybe it's recency bias, but I do like him.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: I really love goodwill hunting man I like man damon's stuff, the, the boring stuff.
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's.
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a pretty good one too, man.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: All right, and the last and most important question tell me two words that would describe sarah amazing and tolerant oh good ones.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 1: We've not heard tolerant before.
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: That is a fantastic word.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: Staff.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: The lighting round's over we both kind of giggled.
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 1: This one was more serious than the lighting round.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: Usually I get really, really goofy, but for some reason I wasn't feeling as goofy as I normally do.
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 1: Again, blank piece of paper, two pages of notes, everybody at home.
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: You don't need a podcast to have conversations like these.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 1: Lights need as little time and curiosity.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: And if you've not talked to one of your buddies who's a dad and you're curious what they're struggling with, go talk to them.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: Take them to coffee, grab a beer, grab lunch you know, grab breakfast one morning.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: It is.
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 1: It is rewarding.
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 1: What will happen.
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: I get free therapy out of every episode I do.
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 1: I've almost interviewed over 300 people in six years.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 1: It is an absolute honor and gift that I get to do this, and thank you to Ty Nunez, my college teammate.
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: Uncle Rico moment right there why I'm still doing this, and if he wouldn't have motivated me off the couch during COVID 2020, I would not be doing it.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: So, ty, I love you, brother, so thankful for this.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: But, dan, I'll make sure everything's tagged in the show notes.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: It has been an honor getting to know you, it's been an honor to learn more about you and your dad's skills, and I think you dropped a lot of wisdom on us that we can take as actionable advice to become better leaders of our home.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: So, without further ado, brother, thank you again so much for spending some time with me today.
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: Appreciate you having me, casey.