Latest / Science Fiction Books - Daily / 17 - The Flying Inn - GK Chesterton
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Chapter seventeen, The poet in Parliament, during the singular entrance
- 0:06Speaker 1: and exit of Dorian Wimpole M P J P et cetera,
- 0:11Speaker 1: Lady Joan was looking out of the magic casements of
- 0:14Speaker 1: that turret room, which was now literally, and not only poetically,
- 0:18Speaker 1: the last limit of ivy wood House. The old broken
- 0:22Speaker 1: hole and black staircase up which the lost dog Koodle
- 0:26Speaker 1: used to come and go, had long ago been sealed
- 0:29Speaker 1: up and cemented with a wall of exquisite Eastern workmanship.
- 0:34Speaker 1: All through the patterns, Lord Ivywood had preserved and repeated
- 0:37Speaker 1: the principle that no animal shape must appear. But like
- 0:41Speaker 1: all lucid dogmatists, he perceived all the liberties his dogma
- 0:45Speaker 1: allowed him, and he irradiated this remote end of Ivywood
- 0:49Speaker 1: with sun and moon and solar and starry systems, with
- 0:53Speaker 1: the Milky Way for a dato in a few comets
- 0:56Speaker 1: for comic relief. The thing was well done of its kind,
- 1:00Speaker 1: as were all the things that Philip ivy Wood got
- 1:02Speaker 1: done for him. And if all the windows of the
- 1:04Speaker 1: turret were closed with their peacock curtains, a poet with
- 1:08Speaker 1: anything like a Hypsian appreciation of the family Champagne might
- 1:12Speaker 1: almost fancy he was looking out across the sea on
- 1:15Speaker 1: a night crowded with stars, and what was yet more important,
- 1:20Speaker 1: even my Cisra that exact thinker could not call the
- 1:25Speaker 1: moon a live animal without falling into idolatry. But Joan,
- 1:30Speaker 1: looking out of real windows on a real sky and sea,
- 1:33Speaker 1: thought no more about the astronomical wall paper than about
- 1:36Speaker 1: any other wall paper. She was asking herself in sullen emotionalism,
- 1:42Speaker 1: and for the thousandth time, a question she had never
- 1:45Speaker 1: been able to decide. It was the final choice between
- 1:49Speaker 1: an ambition and a memory, And there was this heavy
- 1:52Speaker 1: weight in the scale that the ambition would probably materialize
- 1:56Speaker 1: and the memory probably wouldn't. It has been in the
- 2:00Speaker 1: same weight, in the same scale a million times since
- 2:04Speaker 1: Satan became the prince of this world. But the evening
- 2:07Speaker 1: stars were strengthening over the old sea shore, and they
- 2:11Speaker 1: also wanted weighing like diamonds. As once before, at the
- 2:15Speaker 1: same stage of brooding, she heard behind her the swish
- 2:18Speaker 1: of Lady Enid's skirts that never came so fast save
- 2:22Speaker 1: for a serious cause. Joone, please do come. Nobody, but
- 2:27Speaker 1: you I do believe could move him Joan looked at
- 2:30Speaker 1: Lady Enid and realized that the lady was close on crying.
- 2:34Speaker 1: She turned a trifle pale and asked quietly for the question.
- 2:39Speaker 1: Philip says he's going to London now with that leg
- 2:42Speaker 1: and all cried Enid, and he won't let us say
- 2:45Speaker 1: a word. But how did it all happen? Asked Joan.
- 2:49Speaker 1: Lady Enid Wimple was quite incapable of explaining how it
- 2:53Speaker 1: all happened, so the task must for the moment devolve
- 2:56Speaker 1: on the author. The simple fact was that Ivywood, in
- 3:00Speaker 1: the course of turning over magazines on his sofa, happened
- 3:04Speaker 1: to look at a paper from the Midlands. The Turkish News,
- 3:08Speaker 1: said mister Levison rather nervously, is on the other side
- 3:13Speaker 1: of the page. But Lord Ivywood continued to look at
- 3:16Speaker 1: the side of the paper that did not contain the
- 3:19Speaker 1: Turkish News, with the same dignity of lowered eyelids and
- 3:23Speaker 1: unconscious brow with which he had looked at the Captain's
- 3:26Speaker 1: message when Joan found him by the turret. On the
- 3:30Speaker 1: page covered merely with casual provincial happenings was a paragraph
- 3:35Speaker 1: echo of Pebblewick Mystery reported reappearance of the vanishing inn
- 3:41Speaker 1: underneath was printed in smaller letters. An almost incredible report
- 3:46Speaker 1: from Whittington announces that the mysterious sign of the Old
- 3:50Speaker 1: Ship has once more been seen in this country, though
- 3:53Speaker 1: it has long been relegated by scientific investigators to the
- 3:56Speaker 1: limbo of old rustic superstitions. According to the local version,
- 4:01Speaker 1: mister Simmons, a dairy man of Whittington, was serving in
- 4:05Speaker 1: his shop when two motorists entered, one of them asking
- 4:08Speaker 1: for a glass of milk. They were in the most
- 4:10Speaker 1: impenetrable motoring panopoly, with darkened goggles and waterproof collars, turned up,
- 4:16Speaker 1: so that nothing can be recalled of them personally, except
- 4:19Speaker 1: that one was a person of unusual stature. In a
- 4:23Speaker 1: few moments, this latter individual went out of the shop
- 4:25Speaker 1: again and returned with a miserable specimen out of the street,
- 4:29Speaker 1: one of the tattered loafers that linger about our most
- 4:32Speaker 1: prosperous towns, tramping the streets all night and even begging
- 4:36Speaker 1: in defiance of the police. The filth and disease of
- 4:39Speaker 1: the creature were so squalid that mister Simmons at first
- 4:42Speaker 1: refused to serve him with the glass of milk, which
- 4:45Speaker 1: the taller motorists wished to provide for him at length. However,
- 4:49Speaker 1: mister Simmons consented, and was immediately astonished by an incident
- 4:54Speaker 1: against which he certainly had a more assured right to protest.
- 4:58Speaker 1: The taller motorists sang to the low but man, you're
- 5:02Speaker 1: blue in the face, made a species of signs to
- 5:05Speaker 1: the smaller motorist, who thereupon appears to have pierced a
- 5:09Speaker 1: sort of cindrilical trunk or chest that seemed to be
- 5:13Speaker 1: his only luggage, and drawn from it a few drops
- 5:16Speaker 1: of a yellow liquid, which he deliberately dropped into the
- 5:19Speaker 1: ragged creature's milk. It was afterward discovered to be rum,
- 5:23Speaker 1: and the protests of mister Simmons may be imagined. The
- 5:27Speaker 1: tall motorist, however, warmly defended his action, having apparently some
- 5:31Speaker 1: wild idea that he was doing an act of kindness.
- 5:35Speaker 1: Why I found the man nearly fainting, he said, if
- 5:38Speaker 1: you'd picked him off a raft, he couldn't be more
- 5:41Speaker 1: collapsed with cold and sickness. And if you'd picked him
- 5:44Speaker 1: off a raft, you'd have given him rum. Yes, by
- 5:48Speaker 1: Saint Patrick, if you were a bloody pirate, and made
- 5:51Speaker 1: him walk the plank. Afterward, mister Simmons replied with dignity
- 5:55Speaker 1: that he did not know how it was with rafts
- 5:58Speaker 1: and could not permit such language in his shop. He
- 6:02Speaker 1: added that he would lay himself open to a police
- 6:04Speaker 1: prosecution if he permitted the consumption of alcohol in his shop,
- 6:08Speaker 1: since he did not display a sign. The motorists then
- 6:13Speaker 1: made the amazing reply, but you do display a sign,
- 6:16Speaker 1: you jolly old man. Did you think I couldn't find
- 6:19Speaker 1: my way to the sign of the old ship, you
- 6:22Speaker 1: sly boots. Mister Simmons was now fully convinced of the
- 6:26Speaker 1: intoxication of his visitors, and, refusing a glass of rum
- 6:30Speaker 1: rather boisterously offered him, went outside his shop to look
- 6:34Speaker 1: round for a policeman. To his surprise, he found the
- 6:37Speaker 1: officer engaged in dispersing a considerable crowd which was staring
- 6:41Speaker 1: up at some object behind him. On looking round, he
- 6:45Speaker 1: states in his deposition, he saw what was undoubtedly one
- 6:49Speaker 1: of the low tavern signs at one time common in England.
- 6:53Speaker 1: He was wholly unable to explain its presence outside his premises,
- 6:58Speaker 1: and as it undoubtedly legal, the motorist's action, the police
- 7:02Speaker 1: declined to move in the matter. Later, the two motorists
- 7:06Speaker 1: have apparently left the town unmolested in a small, second
- 7:10Speaker 1: hand two cedar. There is no clue to their destination,
- 7:13Speaker 1: except it be indicated by a single incident. It appears that,
- 7:18Speaker 1: when they were waiting for the second glass of milk,
- 7:20Speaker 1: one of them drew attention to a milk can of
- 7:22Speaker 1: a shape seemingly unfamiliar to him, which was, of course
- 7:26Speaker 1: the Mountain milk, now so much recommended by doctors. The
- 7:30Speaker 1: taller motorist, who seemed in every way strangely ignorant of
- 7:34Speaker 1: modern science and social life, asked his companion where it
- 7:38Speaker 1: came from, receiving, of course, the reply that it is
- 7:41Speaker 1: manufactured in the model village of peace Ways, under the
- 7:45Speaker 1: personal superintendence of its distinguished and philanthropic inventor, doctor Meadows.
- 7:50Speaker 1: Upon this, the taller person, who appeared highly irresponsible, actually
- 7:55Speaker 1: bought the whole can, observing as he tucked it under
- 7:58Speaker 1: his arm that it would help him to remember the address. Later,
- 8:03Speaker 1: our readers will be glad to hear that the legend
- 8:05Speaker 1: of the old ship sign has once more yielded to
- 8:08Speaker 1: the wholesome skepticism of science. Our representative reached Whittington after
- 8:13Speaker 1: the practical jokers or whatever they were, had left. But
- 8:17Speaker 1: he searched the whole frontage of mister Simmons's shop, and
- 8:20Speaker 1: we are in a position to assure the public that
- 8:23Speaker 1: there is no trace of the alleged sign. Lord Ivywood
- 8:29Speaker 1: laid down the newspaper and looked at the rich and
- 8:31Speaker 1: serpentine embroideries on the wall, with the expression that a
- 8:35Speaker 1: great general might have if he saw a chance of
- 8:37Speaker 1: really ruining his enemy, if he would also ruin all
- 8:40Speaker 1: his previous plan of campaign. His pallid and classic profile
- 8:45Speaker 1: was as immovable as a cameo, but anyone who had
- 8:48Speaker 1: known him at all would have known that his brain
- 8:51Speaker 1: was going like a motor car that had broken the
- 8:53Speaker 1: speed limit long ago. Then he turned his head and said,
- 8:58Speaker 1: please tell Hicks to bring round the long blue car
- 9:00Speaker 1: in half an hour. It can be fitted up for
- 9:02Speaker 1: a sofa, and asked the gardener to cut a pole
- 9:05Speaker 1: of about four feet nine inches and put a cross
- 9:08Speaker 1: piece for a crutch. I'm going to London to night.
- 9:12Speaker 1: Mister Levison's lower jaw literally fell with astonishment. The doctor
- 9:17Speaker 1: said three weeks. He said, if I may ask it,
- 9:20Speaker 1: where are you going Saint Stephen's Westminster, answered Ivywood. Surely,
- 9:26Speaker 1: said mister Levison, I could take a message. You could
- 9:30Speaker 1: take a message, assented Ivywood. I'm afraid they would not
- 9:33Speaker 1: allow you to make a speech. It was a moment
- 9:37Speaker 1: or two afterward that Enid Whimpole had come into the
- 9:39Speaker 1: room and striven in vain to shake his decision. Then
- 9:43Speaker 1: it was that Joan had been brought out of the
- 9:45Speaker 1: turret and saw Philip standing sustained upon a crutch of
- 9:48Speaker 1: garden timber, and admired him as she had never admired
- 9:52Speaker 1: him before. While he was being helped downstairs, while he
- 9:56Speaker 1: was being propped in the car with such limited comfort
- 9:59Speaker 1: as possible, she did really feel in him something worthy
- 10:02Speaker 1: of his ancient roots, worthy of such hills, and of
- 10:06Speaker 1: such a sea. For she felt God's wind from nowhere,
- 10:09Speaker 1: which is called the will, and is man's only excuse
- 10:13Speaker 1: upon this earth. In the small tute of the starting motor,
- 10:18Speaker 1: she could hear a hundred trumpets, such as might have
- 10:20Speaker 1: called her ancestors and his to the glories of the
- 10:24Speaker 1: Third Crusade. Such imaginary military honors were not, at least
- 10:29Speaker 1: in the strategic sense undeserved. Lord Ivywood really had seen
- 10:33Speaker 1: the whole map of the situation in front of him,
- 10:36Speaker 1: and swiftly formed a plan to meet it in a
- 10:39Speaker 1: manner not unworthy of Napoleon. The realities of the situation
- 10:43Speaker 1: unrolled themselves before him, and his mind was marking them
- 10:46Speaker 1: one by one as with a pencil. First, he knew
- 10:49Speaker 1: that Dolroy would probably go to the model village. It
- 10:53Speaker 1: was just the sort of place he would go to.
- 10:55Speaker 1: He knew Dolroy was almost constitutionally incapable of not kicking
- 10:59Speaker 1: up some kind of row in a place of that kind. Second,
- 11:05Speaker 1: he knew that if he missed Dalroy at this address,
- 11:08Speaker 1: it was very likely to be his last address. He
- 11:11Speaker 1: and mister Pump were quite clever enough to leave no
- 11:14Speaker 1: more hints behind. Third, he guessed, by careful consideration of
- 11:19Speaker 1: map and clock, that they could not get so remoted
- 11:22Speaker 1: region in so cheap a car under something like two days,
- 11:27Speaker 1: nor do anything very conclusive in less than three. Thus
- 11:31Speaker 1: he had just time to turn round him. Fourth, he
- 11:35Speaker 1: realized that ever since that day when Dalroy swung round
- 11:38Speaker 1: the signboard and smote the policeman into the ditch, Dalroy
- 11:41Speaker 1: had swung round the Ivywood Act on Lord Ivywood. He
- 11:46Speaker 1: Lord Ivywood had thought, and might well have thought rightly,
- 11:50Speaker 1: that by restricting the old signposts to a few places
- 11:54Speaker 1: so select that they can afford to be eccentric, and
- 11:57Speaker 1: forbidding such artistic symbols to all other places, he could
- 12:02Speaker 1: sweep fermented liquor for all practical purposes out of the land.
- 12:07Speaker 1: The arrangement was exactly that at which all such legislation
- 12:11Speaker 1: is consciously or unconsciously aiming. A sign board could be
- 12:15Speaker 1: a favor granted by the governing class to itself. If
- 12:20Speaker 1: a gentleman wished to claim the liberties of a bohemian,
- 12:23Speaker 1: the path would be open. If a bohemian wished to
- 12:26Speaker 1: claim the liberties of a gentleman, the path would be shut.
- 12:30Speaker 1: So gradually, Lord Ivywood had thought, the old signs, which
- 12:34Speaker 1: can alone sell alcohol, will dwindle down to mere curiosities
- 12:39Speaker 1: like audit ale or the mead that may still be
- 12:41Speaker 1: found in the new forest. The calculation was by no
- 12:45Speaker 1: means unstatesmanlike, but like many other statesmanlike calculations, it did
- 12:51Speaker 1: not take into account the idea of deadwood walking about
- 12:55Speaker 1: so long as his flying foes might set up their
- 12:57Speaker 1: sign anywhere. It mattered whether the result was enjoyment or
- 13:02Speaker 1: disappointment for the populace. In either case it must mean
- 13:06Speaker 1: constant scandal or riot. If there was one thing worse
- 13:10Speaker 1: than the appearance of the old ship, it was its disappearance.
- 13:16Speaker 1: He realized that his own law was letting them loose
- 13:18Speaker 1: every time, for the local authorities hesitated to act on
- 13:22Speaker 1: the spot in defiance of a symbol now so exclusive
- 13:26Speaker 1: and therefore impressive. He realized that the law must be altered,
- 13:31Speaker 1: must be altered at once, must be altered if possible,
- 13:35Speaker 1: before the fugitives broke away from the model village of
- 13:38Speaker 1: peace Ways. He realized that it was Thursday. This was
- 13:43Speaker 1: the day on which any private member of Parliament could
- 13:45Speaker 1: introduce any private bill of the kind called non contentious
- 13:50Speaker 1: and pass it without a division, so long as no
- 13:52Speaker 1: particular member made any particular fuss. He realized that it
- 13:57Speaker 1: was improbable that any particular member would make any particular
- 14:00Speaker 1: fuss about Lord Ivywood's own improvement on Lord Ivywood's own act. Finally,
- 14:07Speaker 1: he realized that the whole case could be met by
- 14:09Speaker 1: so slight an improvement as this change the words of
- 14:13Speaker 1: the Act, which he knew by heart, as happier man
- 14:16Speaker 1: might know a song. If such a sign be present,
- 14:19Speaker 1: liquids containing alcohol can be sold on the premises. To
- 14:24Speaker 1: these other words, liquids containing alcohol can be sold, if
- 14:29Speaker 1: previously preserved for three days on the premises it was
- 14:34Speaker 1: mate in a few moves. Parliament could never reject or
- 14:37Speaker 1: even examine so slight an emendation, and the revolution of
- 14:41Speaker 1: the old Ship and the late King of Ithaca would
- 14:44Speaker 1: be crushed forever. It does undoubtedly show, as we have said,
- 14:49Speaker 1: something napoleonic in the man's mind, that the whole of
- 14:53Speaker 1: this excellent and even successful plan was complete long before
- 14:57Speaker 1: he saw the great glowing clock on the towers of
- 14:59Speaker 1: Westmins and knew he was in time. It was unfortunate,
- 15:04Speaker 1: perhaps that about the same time, or not long after,
- 15:08Speaker 1: another gentleman of the same rank, and indirectly of the
- 15:11Speaker 1: same family, having left the restaurant in Regent Street and
- 15:15Speaker 1: the tangle of Piccadilly, had drifted serenely down Whitehall, and
- 15:19Speaker 1: had seen the same great golden goblin's eye on the
- 15:22Speaker 1: tall tower of Saint Stephen, the Poet of the Birds.
- 15:26Speaker 1: Like most Esthetes had known as little of the real
- 15:29Speaker 1: town as he had of the real country, but he
- 15:32Speaker 1: had remembered a good place for supper, and as he
- 15:36Speaker 1: passed certain great cold clubs, built of stone and looking
- 15:40Speaker 1: like a Syrian sarcophagi, he remembered that he belonged to
- 15:44Speaker 1: many of them. And so when he saw afar Off
- 15:47Speaker 1: sitting above the river what had been very erroneously described
- 15:51Speaker 1: as the best club in London, he suddenly remembered that
- 15:54Speaker 1: he belonged to that too. He could not at the
- 15:57Speaker 1: moment recall what constituency in South England it was that
- 16:01Speaker 1: he sat for, but he knew he could walk into
- 16:04Speaker 1: the place if he wanted to. He might not have
- 16:07Speaker 1: so expressed the matter, but he knew that in an
- 16:10Speaker 1: oligarchy things go by respect for persons and not for
- 16:13Speaker 1: claims by visiting cards and not by voting cards. He
- 16:18Speaker 1: had not been near the place for years, being permanently
- 16:21Speaker 1: paired against the famous patriot who had accepted an important
- 16:25Speaker 1: government appointment in a private mad house. Even in his
- 16:29Speaker 1: silliest days, he had never pretended to feel any respect
- 16:32Speaker 1: for modern politics, and made all haste to put his
- 16:35Speaker 1: leaders and the mad Patriots leaders on the well selected
- 16:39Speaker 1: list of the creatures whom Man forgets he had made
- 16:43Speaker 1: one really eloquent speech in the House on the subject
- 16:46Speaker 1: of guerrillas, and then found he was speaking against his party.
- 16:50Speaker 1: It was an indescribable sort of place, anyhow, Even Lord
- 16:54Speaker 1: Ivywood did not go to it except to do some
- 16:57Speaker 1: business that could be done nowhere else. As was the
- 17:00Speaker 1: case that night. Ivywood was what is called a peer
- 17:04Speaker 1: by courtesy. His place was in the Commons, and for
- 17:08Speaker 1: the time being on the opposition side. But though he
- 17:11Speaker 1: visited the House but seldom, he knew far too much
- 17:14Speaker 1: about it to go into the chamber itself. He limped
- 17:18Speaker 1: into the smoking room, though he did not smoke, procured
- 17:21Speaker 1: a needless cigarette in a much needed sheet of note paper,
- 17:25Speaker 1: and composed a curt but careful note to the one
- 17:27Speaker 1: member of the Government whom he knew must be in
- 17:30Speaker 1: the House, having sent it up to him. He waited outside.
- 17:35Speaker 1: Mister Dorrian Wimpole also waited, leaning on the parapet of
- 17:40Speaker 1: Westminster Bridge and looking down the river. He was becoming
- 17:44Speaker 1: one of the Oysters in a more solemn and solid
- 17:47Speaker 1: sense than he had hitherto conceived possible. And also with
- 17:51Speaker 1: a strictly vegetarian beverage which bears the noble and starry
- 17:55Speaker 1: name of Nuits. He felt that piece with all things,
- 17:59Speaker 1: even in a manner with politics. It was one of
- 18:03Speaker 1: those magic hours of evening when the red and golden
- 18:06Speaker 1: lights of men are already lit along the river and
- 18:09Speaker 1: look like the lights of goblins, but daylight still lingers
- 18:13Speaker 1: in a cold and delicate green. He felt about the
- 18:17Speaker 1: river something of that smiling and glorious sadness which two
- 18:21Speaker 1: Englishmen have expressed under the figure of the white wood
- 18:24Speaker 1: of an old ship fading like a fantom Turner in
- 18:27Speaker 1: painting and Henry Newbolt in poetry. He had come back
- 18:32Speaker 1: to earth like a man fallen from the moon. He was,
- 18:35Speaker 1: at bottom, not only a poet, but a patriot, and
- 18:38Speaker 1: a patriot is always a little sad. Yet his melancholy
- 18:43Speaker 1: was mixed up with that immutable yet meaningless faith which
- 18:46Speaker 1: few Englishmen, even in modern times, fail to feel. At
- 18:50Speaker 1: the unexpected sight either of Westminster or of that height
- 18:54Speaker 1: on which stands the Temple of Saint Paul, while flows
- 18:58Speaker 1: the Sacred River, while stands the Sacred Hill, he murmured
- 19:03Speaker 1: in some schoolboy echo of the ballad of Lake Regulus,
- 19:08Speaker 1: while flows the sacred River, while stands the sacred Hill.
- 19:13Speaker 1: The proud old pantaloons and nincompoops, who yawn at the
- 19:17Speaker 1: very length of their own lives in that accursed sanhedrum
- 19:20Speaker 1: where people put each other's hats on in a poisonous
- 19:24Speaker 1: room with no more windows than hell, shall have such
- 19:28Speaker 1: honor still relieved by this rendering a Macaulay in the
- 19:33Speaker 1: style known among his cultured friends as ver libre or poesy.
- 19:38Speaker 1: Set free from the shackles of formal meter, he strolled
- 19:42Speaker 1: toward the member's entrance and went in. Lacking Lord Ivywood's experience,
- 19:48Speaker 1: he strolled into the commons chamber itself and sat down
- 19:52Speaker 1: on a green bench, under the impression that the house
- 19:55Speaker 1: was not sitting. He was, however, gradually able to distinguish
- 19:59Speaker 1: some six or eight drowsy human forms from the seats
- 20:02Speaker 1: on which they sat, and to hear a senile voice
- 20:06Speaker 1: with an Essex accent, saying all on one note and
- 20:10Speaker 1: without beginning or end, in a manner which is quite
- 20:13Speaker 1: impossible to punctuate. No wish at all that this proposal
- 20:18Speaker 1: should be regarded except in the right way, and have
- 20:20Speaker 1: tried to put it in the right way, and cannot
- 20:22Speaker 1: think the Honorable Member was altogether adding to his reputation
- 20:26Speaker 1: in putting it in what those who think we must
- 20:29Speaker 1: of course consider the wrong way. And I, for one,
- 20:32Speaker 1: am free to say that.
- 20:33Speaker 2: If in his desire to settle this great question he
- 20:36Speaker 2: takes this hasty course, and this revolutionary course about slate pencils,
- 20:41Speaker 2: he may not be able to prevent the extremists behind him.
- 20:44Speaker 1: From applying it to lead pencils.
- 20:46Speaker 2: And while I should be the last to increase the
- 20:49Speaker 2: heat and the excitement and the personalities of this debate,
- 20:52Speaker 2: if I could possibly help it, I must confess that,
- 20:55Speaker 2: in my opinion, the Honorable Gentleman has himself encouraged that
- 20:59Speaker 2: heat and personality in a manner that he now doubtless regrets.
- 21:03Speaker 2: I have no desire to use abusive terms. Indeed, you,
- 21:06Speaker 2: mister Speaker, would not allow me, of course to use
- 21:09Speaker 2: abusive terms. But I must tell the Honorable Member face
- 21:12Speaker 2: to face that the perambulators with which he has twitted
- 21:15Speaker 2: me cannot be germane to this discussion. I should be
- 21:18Speaker 2: the last person Dorian Wimpole had softly risen to go
- 21:23Speaker 2: when he was arrested by the sight of someone sliding
- 21:26Speaker 2: into the house and handing a note to the solitary
- 21:29Speaker 2: young man with heavy eyelids, who was at that moment
- 21:33Speaker 2: governing all England from the treasury bench. Seeing him go out,
- 21:38Speaker 2: Dorian had a sickening sweetness of hope, as he might
- 21:41Speaker 2: have said in his earlier poems, that something intelligible might
- 21:45Speaker 2: happen after all, and followed him out almost with alacrity.
- 21:51Speaker 2: The solitary and sleepy Governor of Great Britain went down
- 21:54Speaker 2: into the lower crypts of its Temple of Freedom and
- 21:57Speaker 2: turned into an apartment, where Wimpole was astonished to see
- 22:00Speaker 2: his cousin Ivywood sitting at a little table with a
- 22:03Speaker 2: large crutch, leaning beside him, as serene as long. John Silver,
- 22:08Speaker 2: the young man with the heavy eyelids, sat down opposite him,
- 22:12Speaker 2: and they had a conversation, which Wimpole of course did
- 22:15Speaker 2: not hear. He withdrew into an adjoining room, where he
- 22:19Speaker 2: managed to procure coffee and a liqueur, an excellent liqueur
- 22:23Speaker 2: which he had forgotten, and of which he had more
- 22:26Speaker 2: than one glass. But he had so posted himself that
- 22:30Speaker 2: ivy Wood could not come out without passing him, and
- 22:33Speaker 2: he waited for what might happen with exquisite patience. The
- 22:38Speaker 2: only thing that seemed to him queer was that every
- 22:41Speaker 2: now and then a bell rang in several rooms at once.
- 22:44Speaker 2: And whenever the bell rang, Lord ivy Wood nodded as
- 22:48Speaker 2: if he were part of the electrical machinery. And whenever
- 22:52Speaker 2: Lord ivy Wood nodded, the young man turned and sped
- 22:55Speaker 2: upstairs like a mountaineer, returning in a short time to
- 22:58Speaker 2: resume the conversation. On the third occasion, the poet began
- 23:03Speaker 2: to observe that many others from the other rooms could
- 23:05Speaker 2: be heard running upstairs at the sound of this bell,
- 23:09Speaker 2: and returning with the slightly less rapid step which expresses
- 23:12Speaker 2: relief after.
- 23:13Speaker 1: A duty done. Yet did he not know that this
- 23:16Speaker 1: duty was representative government, and that it is thus that
- 23:20Speaker 1: the cry of Cumberland or Cornwall can come to the
- 23:23Speaker 1: ears of an English king. Suddenly the sleepy young man
- 23:27Speaker 1: sprang erect, uninspired by any bell, and strode out once more.
- 23:33Speaker 1: The poet could not help hearing him say as he
- 23:35Speaker 1: left the table, jotting down something with a pencil. Alcohol
- 23:40Speaker 1: can be sold if previously preserved for three days on
- 23:43Speaker 1: the premises. I think we can do it, but you
- 23:46Speaker 1: can't come on for half an hour. Saying this, he
- 23:50Speaker 1: darted upstairs again, And when Dorian saw Ivywood come out
- 23:53Speaker 1: laboriously afterward on his large country crutch, he had exactly
- 23:58Speaker 1: the same revulsion in his favor that Joan had had.
- 24:02Speaker 1: Jumping up from his table, which was in one of
- 24:05Speaker 1: the private dining rooms, he touched the other on the
- 24:07Speaker 1: elbow and said, I want to apologize to you, Philip,
- 24:11Speaker 1: for my rudeness this afternoon. Honestly, I am sorry. Pine
- 24:16Speaker 1: woods and prison cells try a man's temper, but I
- 24:19Speaker 1: had no rag of excuse for not saying that. For
- 24:22Speaker 1: neither of them were you to blame. I'd no notion
- 24:26Speaker 1: you were coming up to town to night with your
- 24:28Speaker 1: leg in all, you mustn't knock yourself up like this.
- 24:32Speaker 1: Do sit down a minute. It seemed to him that
- 24:35Speaker 1: the bleak face of Philip softened a little. How far
- 24:38Speaker 1: he really softened will never be known until such men
- 24:41Speaker 1: as he are understood by their fellows. It is certain
- 24:45Speaker 1: that he carefully unhooked himself from his crutch and sat
- 24:48Speaker 1: down opposite his cousin, whereupon his cousin struck the table
- 24:52Speaker 1: so that it rang like a dinner bell, and called
- 24:55Speaker 1: out waiter as if he were in a crowded restaurant.
- 25:00Speaker 1: Before Lord Ivywood could protest, he said, it's awfully jolly
- 25:04Speaker 1: that we've met. I suppose you've come up to make
- 25:07Speaker 1: a speech. I should like to hear it. We haven't
- 25:11Speaker 1: always agreed, but by God, if there's anything good left
- 25:14Speaker 1: in literature, it's your speeches reported in a newspaper, that
- 25:19Speaker 1: thing of yours that ended death and the last shutting
- 25:22Speaker 1: of the iron doors of defeat. Why you must go
- 25:25Speaker 1: back to Strafford's last speech for such English. Do let
- 25:29Speaker 1: me hear your speech. I've got a seat upstairs, you know,
- 25:33Speaker 1: if you wish it, said ivy Wood hurriedly. But I
- 25:36Speaker 1: shan't make much of a speech tonight, and he looked
- 25:39Speaker 1: at the wall behind Wimpole's head with thunderous wrinkles thickening
- 25:43Speaker 1: on his brow. It was essential to his brilliant and
- 25:46Speaker 1: rapid scheme, of course, that the Commons should make no
- 25:49Speaker 1: comment at all on his little alteration in the law.
- 25:53Speaker 1: An intendant hovered near in response to the demand for
- 25:56Speaker 1: a waiter, and was much impressed by the presence and
- 25:59Speaker 1: condition of Ivywood. But as that exalted cripple resolutely refused
- 26:04Speaker 1: anything in the way of liquor, his cousin was so
- 26:07Speaker 1: kind as to have a little more himself, and resumed
- 26:10Speaker 1: his remarks. It's about this public house affair of yours.
- 26:14Speaker 1: I suppose i'd like to hear you speak on that.
- 26:18Speaker 1: Perhaps i'll speak myself. I've been thinking about it a
- 26:21Speaker 1: good deal all day, and a good deal of last
- 26:24Speaker 1: night too. Now here's what I should say to the house,
- 26:27Speaker 1: if I were you to begin with? Can you abolish
- 26:30Speaker 1: the public house? Are you important enough now to abolish
- 26:33Speaker 1: the public house? Whether it's right or wrong? Can you,
- 26:37Speaker 1: in the long run prevent haymakers having ale any more
- 26:41Speaker 1: than you can prevent me having this glass of chartreuse?
- 26:45Speaker 1: The attendant, hearing the word once more, drew near, but
- 26:48Speaker 1: heard no further order. Or rather, the orders he heard
- 26:51Speaker 1: were such as he was less able to cope with.
- 26:55Speaker 1: Remember the curate, said Dorian, abstractedly, shaking his head at
- 26:59Speaker 1: the functionary. Remember the sensible little high church curate, who,
- 27:04Speaker 1: when asked for a temperance sermon, preached on the text.
- 27:07Speaker 1: Suffer us not to be overwhelmed in the water floods. Indeed, indeed, Philip,
- 27:12Speaker 1: you are in deeper waters than you know. You will
- 27:15Speaker 1: abolish ale, you will make. Can't forget hop poles and Devonshire,
- 27:19Speaker 1: forget cider. The fate of the inn is to be
- 27:22Speaker 1: settled in that hot little room upstairs. Take care its
- 27:26Speaker 1: fate and yours are not settled in the inn. Take
- 27:30Speaker 1: care Englishmen don't sit in judgment on you, as they
- 27:33Speaker 1: do on many another corpse at an inquest at a
- 27:36Speaker 1: common public house. Take care that the one tavern that
- 27:40Speaker 1: is really neglected and shut up and passed like a
- 27:43Speaker 1: house of pestilence is not the tavern in which I
- 27:47Speaker 1: drink to night, and that merely because it is the
- 27:49Speaker 1: worst tavern on the King's Highway. Take care this place
- 27:53Speaker 1: where we sit does not get a name like any
- 27:55Speaker 1: pub where sailors are hocused or girls debauched. That is
- 28:00Speaker 1: what I shall say to them, said he, rising cheerfully.
- 28:04Speaker 1: That's what I shall say. See you to it, he cried,
- 28:07Speaker 1: with a sudden passion, and apparently to the waiter, see
- 28:10Speaker 1: you to it. If the sign that is destroyed is
- 28:12Speaker 1: not the sign of the old ship, but the sign
- 28:16Speaker 1: of the mace, and bauble, and in the words of
- 28:19Speaker 1: a highly historical brewer, if we see a dog bark
- 28:22Speaker 1: at your going, Lord Ivywood was observing him with a
- 28:26Speaker 1: deathly quietude. Another idea had come into his fertile mind.
- 28:31Speaker 1: He knew his cousin, though excited, was not in the
- 28:34Speaker 1: least intoxicated. He knew that he was quite capable of
- 28:38Speaker 1: making a speech, and even a good one. He knew
- 28:41Speaker 1: that any speech, good or bad, would wreck his whole
- 28:43Speaker 1: plan and send the wild Inn flying again. But the
- 28:47Speaker 1: orator had resumed his seat and drained his glass, passing
- 28:50Speaker 1: a hand across his brow, and he remembered that a
- 28:53Speaker 1: man who keeps a vigil in the wood all night
- 28:56Speaker 1: and drinks wine on the following evening is liable to
- 28:59Speaker 1: an accident that is not drunkenness, but something much healthier.
- 29:04Speaker 1: I suppose your speech will come on pretty soon, said Dorian,
- 29:07Speaker 1: looking at the table. You'll let me know when it does,
- 29:10Speaker 1: of course, really and truly I don't want to miss it,
- 29:14Speaker 1: and I've forgotten all the ways here and feel pretty tired.
- 29:18Speaker 1: You will let me know, yes, said Lord Ivywood. Stillness
- 29:23Speaker 1: fell along all the rooms until Lord Ivywood broke it
- 29:27Speaker 1: by saying debate is a most necessary thing, but there
- 29:32Speaker 1: are times when it rather impedes than assists parliamentary government.
- 29:38Speaker 1: He received no reply. Dorian still sat as if looking
- 29:41Speaker 1: at the table, but his eyelids had lightly fallen. He
- 29:44Speaker 1: was asleep. Almost at the same moment, the member of Government,
- 29:49Speaker 1: who was nearly asleep, appeared at the entrance of the
- 29:53Speaker 1: long room and made some sort of weary signal. Philip
- 29:56Speaker 1: Ivywood raised himself on his crutch and stood for a
- 30:00Speaker 1: moment looking at the sleeping man. Then he and his
- 30:03Speaker 1: crutch trailed out of the long room, leaving the sleeping
- 30:06Speaker 1: man behind. Nor was that the only thing that he
- 30:09Speaker 1: left behind. He also left behind an unlighted cigarette, and
- 30:13Speaker 1: his honor, and all the England of his fathers, everything
- 30:17Speaker 1: that could really distinguish that high house beside the river
- 30:21Speaker 1: from any tavern for the hocussing of sailors. He went
- 30:26Speaker 1: upstairs and did his business in twenty minutes, and the
- 30:29Speaker 1: only speech he had ever delivered without any trace of eloquence.
- 30:34Speaker 1: And from that hour forth he was the naked fanatic,
- 30:38Speaker 1: and could feed on nothing but the future. End of
- 30:43Speaker 1: Chapter seventeen