Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #536 I'll Do Better Tomorrow

Transcript

#536 I'll Do Better Tomorrow · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Time poor parent who just once answers.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: Now, but it highlights to me how important it is
• 0:13
  Speaker 3: that we really work with our kids on helping them
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: to utilize their screens in ways that don't interfere with
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: how we function in our family and in our relationships.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, my mum
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: and dad.
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: Hello, this is doctor Justin Colson, the founder of Happy
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: Families dot com. Dot you Friday morning at least if
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: you listen to this on the time that it drops.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: It's Friday morning and the weekend is just around the corner.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: I'm here with Kylie is smiling because the weekend's nearly here.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: No, I'm actually smiling because I finally kicked you out
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: of the house.
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: Right, Okay, so I'm officially in an office for the
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: first time ever. I've always worked from home and now
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: I'm working in an office and I have to say
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: I miss you and you might be smiling, but I
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: don't like it. I like being able to.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: No, I'm not saying that I don't like you in
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: my Yes, Yes, that's.
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: What I'm hearing. You like it when I'm not around.
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: That's what I know.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: That's not what I'm saying. I like it when you
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: have your space and I have MySpace.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: All right, In other words, you like it when I'm
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: not around.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Well, no, in Brisbane, you had your space and I
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: had my space and we could come together whenever we
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: wanted to throughout the day and I love that.
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: But now, okay and a half down the road.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: But we're in a tiny little house now and we
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: don't have that option. So you stealing a bedroom one
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: of three bedrooms we have.
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: For my office. It wasn't working.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Well, it wasn't. So that's what I'm saying.
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: Okay, Kylie today is I'll do better tomorrow. It's the
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: podcast where we have a conversation about what we've learned
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: during the week, as we've tried to be intentional about
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: our parenting so that we can reflect and be better
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: next time we try to raise children next time. We're
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: involved in the art of parenting. So we received some
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: feedback some email via podcasts at happy Families dot com
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: dot au in response to our podcast on Monday morning, Australia,
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: we have a smacking problem. It was a really important
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: conversation to begin and it continues now with some anonymous
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: feedback from someone who doesn't mind as using the voice memo,
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: but would prefer not to be named Hijason.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: Carli, thank you so much for your recent podcast, Australia
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: has a Smacking Problem. It got me thinking a lot
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: about a situation where I've watched a friend hit a child,
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: and to watch a child be so hurt and distressed
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: and mortified and shaken. It's absolutely horrible and we're all different.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Some of us support it and some of us don't.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: But I'm ashamed to say that I did watch it
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: and not speak to my friend about it. Anyway, I
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: wanted to know your thoughts and thanks again.
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: So Kylie, do you tell your friend? Do you tell
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: somebody that you really care about that you don't like
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: the fact that they're hitting their kids. I've got some ideas,
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: but what's on your mind.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: I think that, as we've experienced time and time again
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: in our own lives, parenting is such a personal thing
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: and you have to have a pretty tight real life
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: relationship with someone to be able to point out, you know,
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: I guess a weakness or a flaw in their parenting
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: without it completely and utterly destroying the relationship. Chances are
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: you're going to say something and it's actually just going
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: to step with the relationship you have with that friend
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: as opposed to help them make changes to the way
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: they do things.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the best thing that you can do is to
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: be a calm influence and to be a calm example
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: with your own kids, so that they say, how do
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: you do it? How do you stay so calm? How
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: do you not hit your kids? And then you get
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: to you give them the opening, But I wouldn't be
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: pursuing it either. In Australia. In fact, in the Western world,
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: we do such a terrible job of parenting like we
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: actually do it all on our own. We get cranky,
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: we act like children ourselves. There is so much that
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: we don't get right. When you look across culturally at
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: the way other people, other nation's, other cultures raise their kids,
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: there's a sense of community, there's additional people lifting the
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: load and lightening the load, and there's also an expectation
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: of the parents we keep it under control, to be
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: an example to our children of what it is to
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: keep it under control. This is something that is not
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: going to go away for this person until they learn
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: to control themselves instead of trying to control their children
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: and trying to talk to somebody about it. I think
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: is just a big mistake. So I'm going to say,
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: don't do it. But thanks so much for we love.
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: We love getting your voice memos, so please keep on
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: sending those through podcasts at Happy Families dot com dot you. Also,
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: this is a heartbreaking email that came through Kylie from
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: somebody who I'm also going to keep anonymous. They're a
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: regular emailer to the Happy Families podcast though, and I
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: want to share this with you. This one comes from
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: somebody overseas, and she says, as I listen to your
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: podcast this morning on smacking, I had tears in my
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: eyes because Kylie and Justin's story seems to be spot
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: on with how I was raised and how I had
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: to make a considered effort to learn new skills and
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: help foster a more positive environment for my daughter. I
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: was often slapped across the face as a child if
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: I was talking back or arguing or not in complete compliance.
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: While I was never smacked, I was slapped across my
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: face frequently, which was very painful and created a lot
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: of fear in my childhood. As an adult, I have
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: anxiety and often second guess my choices and decisions. I
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: don't often feel confident speaking up, and while I've been
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: working on this, it makes me quite uncomfortable when I'm
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: responded back with yelling or the silent treatment, which creates
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: this level of discomfort and shame that overwhelms me at times.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: I would say that now, as an almost forty two
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: year old, I did not turn out fine and have
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: suffered a strained and painful relationship at times with my mother.
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: Even to this day. She says I had to because
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: you never listened to me. What a powerful what a
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: powerful response to that podcast. Thank you so much for
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: sending that email through. We love your feedback voice memos emails.
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: Send them to podcasts at Happy families dot com dot
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: au Kylie for I'll do better tomorrow. Today, I've got
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: a story, You've got a story. We both want to
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: be more intentional as parents. Let's get to those stories
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: right after the break. Dads are pretty awesome, just ask
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: me today. More dads are more involved with their children's
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: lives than ever before, and research shows that their children
• 6:20
  Speaker 3: are really benefiting from it. But too often dads don't
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: realize just how vital they really are. In the Dadding
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: Done Right webinar, Join me, is I examine how dads
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: can be a fantastic support, the ideal role model and
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: an excellent all round best dad ever. Check out Dading
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: Done Right at the Happy Family's webshop.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: It's the Happy Famili's podcast, The podcast with a time
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: poor parent who just wants answers. Now, I'm interested in
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: your story.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: Pick me, pick me. Okay, So I've just finished reading
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: a book. I made a big deal about it yesterday
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: in the podcast Hunt Gather. Parent just finished reading this
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: amazing book by Mike Lean Duclef. Mike Lean is an
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: Irish name apparent, and I got to have a chat
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: with her during the week, Michael indocleff. It's a New
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: York Times bestseller, and she went and visited these different cultures,
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: these different places around the world and took her two
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: year old daughter with her so that she could experience
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: it with her baby and learn about how they parent
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: compared to how we do it. And I don't recommend
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: parenting books very often because frankly, the only ones that
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: I recommend the ones that I write. But this was
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: such a good book. I know I raved about it yesterday,
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: so I'll stop. But had an experience on the weekend
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: that was related to what I read in the book.
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: So in the book, Michael Lane describes how in these
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: cultures they don't force their kids to do things, even chores,
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: but they do expect that they will contribute. They also, though,
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: don't expect their kids to go and do chores on
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: their own, they do tasks together. So I'm thinking on
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: the weekend, as I'm cleaning up some leaves in the garden,
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: why am I doing this on my own? I should
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: have some children helping me. So I called out to Lily,
• 7:57
  Speaker 3: our twelve year old, and Emily, our eight year old. Hey, girls,
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: come and get me a hand with the leaves. Lily,
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: twelve years old, she rolled rise, she stopped it just
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: like blah. I mean, she was so she didn't want
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: to clean up leaves, but she she's twelve, so she
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: held herself together and she came out and helped me anyway.
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: But Emily, our eight year old with ADHD, she's walked
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: out and she's like, I'm not cleaning up leaves, hey,
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: cleaning up leaves. She chucked a bit of a fit
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: and off she walked now. In the book, Michael Lean
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: says that in these tribes, they would ask with an
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: expectation that a child would help, but they would not
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: force the child, and if the child chose not to,
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: they would just shrug their shoulders and let it go.
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: Because there's something in inside our children that makes them
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: want to be where we are and makes them want
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: to contribute. They want to feel like they're big kids
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: doing big jobs. So she said, when you ask the question,
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: wait five minutes before you ask again. And I mean, typically,
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: if I ask the kids to do something, they don't
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: do it, I'll get them fifteen seconds, maybe ten, and
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: then I'll walk over to them and I'll meet their
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: eyes and I'll say I asked you to do something,
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: they'll come and do it. And I'm pretty hardcore, like
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: I'm pretty clear about my expectation. Anyway, I decided to
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: let it go. I decided I would give Emily five
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: minutes before I extended the invitation again. I probably figured
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: the leaves would be cleaned up by then, but whatever.
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: About thirty seconds later, she came out of the house
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: and walked over to me and said, fine, old help.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: I just smart and said great, and after we'd been
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: working side by side, the three of us for maybe
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: a minute, maybe ninety seconds, I realized that some of
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: the leaves were a little bit too far into the
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: garden and a rake would be helpful. So I went
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: and grabbed the rake, and as I started to rake,
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: Emily said, I want to do it. I want to
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: do it. Here's the other thing that michae Lean says
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: in her book, Hun't Gather Parents. She says, we give
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: so much direction to our kids. We're constantly telling them
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: what to do, kind of tizing with the thing that
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: I'm always talking about with correction and direction versus connection.
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: And she said, in these ancient cultures, what they do
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: is they just let them do it, and they encourage
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: them while they're doing it, and then later they teach
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: them how they can do it better. So there's not
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: much in truction until they've already been doing it, and
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: the child is open in the instruction. So I handed
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: Emily of the rake and said, sure thing that I
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: want to make sure the soil doesn't end up on
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: the grass. If you can do that, go for it.
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: She made such a mess. She was doing the worst
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: job ever, and it took everything inside me to not
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: say anything to her and just let her rake the leaves.
• 10:19
  Speaker 3: And I was working beside her and pulling the leaves
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: out as she was moving the dirt everywhere, including onto
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: the grass. But after a couple of minutes, she said, Dad,
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: I'm spilling the soil all of the grass, and you
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: don't want me to do that, do you? I said no.
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: She said, could you help me? And so I spent
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: about twenty seconds showing her how she could rake without
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: putting soil everywhere, and then we cleaned up the mess
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: that she'd made. She worked out in the garden with
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: me for I reckon ten or fifteen minutes, with no encouragement,
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: with no not that I praised them anyway, but with
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: no praise, with no cajoling or coercion. She just helped
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: and she was glad for it, and we got to
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: spend time together, and I just thought, this is amazing.
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: Extend the invitation, don't pester them, Just give them their agency,
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: and then when they decide to help, even if they're
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: making a mess of it, just let them keep on
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: helping anyway, and tie it up afterwards, maybe with a
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: little bit of encouragement and instruction when it's all said
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: and done, it was amazing. I'm so excited about it.
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: I felt like it was I'm going to sound like
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: I've got a big head here, Kylie, and I don't
• 11:20
  Speaker 3: mean to, but I kind of feel like I know
• 11:22
  Speaker 3: a lot about parenting, and I feel like I do
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: it pretty well most of the time. But this has
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: changed so much for me. I feel like this has
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: been a really big aha moment, and I loved the experience.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: So I'm wondering what would have happened if she hadn't
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: have come out. How would you have felt then and
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: how would you have dealt with it.
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: I would have given a five minutes and then gone
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: and extended the invitation again. And if she chose not to,
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: I would have just let it go. Literally, just let
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: it go. It's not worth the fire, it's not worth
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: the big hassles and dramas around control, and you've got
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: to do as I say, it's just not worth it.
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: But here's the crazy thing she did. She did come
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: back out because I gave it the space to let
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: that little voice inside ahead, let those little feelings inside
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: her heart that crave connection. I let those do their job,
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: and as a result, she came and got involved.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: So I think the biggest challenge that we have as
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: parents is the conflict between screens and technology and wanting
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: to spend time with us, because I recognize and see
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: when our kids aren't on screens, they're actually really compliant
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: and really willing to be helpful. But as soon as
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: screens get involved, it's a total it's a game changer.
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: I've been thinking about that since I read the book
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: and since I had that experience, and I'm utterly convinced
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: that this works perfectly and less screens are in the way,
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: which has highlighted to me, and we haven't talked about
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: it yet. We're having the conversation for the first time
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: right now, but it highlights to me how important it
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: is that we really work with our kids on helping
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: them to utilize their screens in ways that don't interfere
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: with how we function in our family, in our relationships.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Nice one, So what's yours? So I often talk about
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: being a little bit spontaneous, letting go of the routine.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: And over the weekend we had our eldest and her
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: husband come and stay with us in our tiny little
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: house and the sleepover room with four kids became sleepover room.
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: With six kids.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Meantime, the trucks arrived and our house has been turned
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: upside down with the second load of stuff.
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: So when we moved out of our house, just for context,
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: we filled two small shipping containers. When we moved to
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: the new house, we unloaded the one with all the
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: essential stuff, and it's been so comfortable having all this
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: space and having empty cupboards and just having what we
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: need to get through. But now the second container has arrived,
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: and oh my goodness, I think we've got to get
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: rid of at least half of it, right, But you've.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: Got to open them all up and go through them
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: to work out what's needed and what's not and rid
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: of it. So anyway, it's a bit chaotic. So on
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: top of all of that, I invite our daughter her
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: husband to come and stay the night with us. And meantime,
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: Miss Lily, who has been twelve for a few months now,
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: has been dying to watch She's the Man.
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: Ye know where you're going with.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: I don't know where the tradition started, but the girls
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: have taken on the mother role and have told her
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: she's not allowed to watch it until she's twelve because
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: somebody somewhere along the line, somebody had to wait until
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: they were twelve to watch it, and that's been the
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: go for forever.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: So our second daughter Abby watched it when she was twelve.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: When Ella wanted to watch it, we said, well, I
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: wait to your twelve because Abby had to, and then
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: it was Annie and now it's literally everyone has to
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: wait to their twelve before they watched She's the Man.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: So Lily has been waiting for months because every time
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: she asks if we can do it, somebody's.
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: Not home because we all have to be there.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: So with Jared and Chanelle at home, I kind of
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: said to them, how do you feel about having a
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: movie night? We'll watch She's the Man. They were just
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: awesome sports and so we all sat down. You got
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: stuck in the kitchen. I have to admit that was
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: a bit sad. But you didn't actually want to watch it,
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: did you.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: No. I would rather have flaming bamboo shoots stuck under
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: my nails then sit down and watch She's the Man,
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: or most movies for that matter.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: One of our children knows all the lines, like all
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: the lines, and as we're watching the movie, she's repeating
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: it and Lily's eyes are popping and she's going.
• 15:16
  Speaker 4: Oh, now I know what that line means, but it
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: was just it was such a joy to have everybody
• 15:23
  Speaker 4: in the room together and just enjoying time together.
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: So there was you and my mum watched it with you,
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: and then there was Chanelle and Jared, Jared did fall asleep,
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: and the other four kids, so there were like seven
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: or eight people laying around in the lounge room watching
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: She's the Man. I finished the kitchen, then went to
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: my bedroom and read. I was reading Mickeleen to Cleff's book.
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: I wanted to get it finished, gather parent because it
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: was so good. But all I heard for an hour
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: and a half was raucous, uproarious laughter as the family
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: laid on the couch and had a movie night, which
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: because I hate movies as a general rule, and I
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: certainly don't like watching kids' movies very much, we don't
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: do that stuff. And it did. I came out and
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: joined in for five or ten minutes towards the end,
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: and it was a lot of fun.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: Just the highlight was it really was a highlight. Highlight
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: to have, you know, our eldest daughter who lives away
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: from home, who loves coming back home to us and
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: spending time together and just seeing all of the kids
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: together and Gramdma just enjoying time. And I was just
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: so grateful that, in spite of the fact that there
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: was so much I could have done, boxes, you know,
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: was scattered all through the house still large, and I
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: could have, you know, spent the evening trying to kind
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: of create more order, that I just took time to
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: be with them. I've watched the movie a bajillion times
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: and I really didn't have to sit down, but such
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: a feel good moment.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: We really hope that you've got some parenting inspiration from
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: this podcast today to take her messages are pretty clear.
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: The Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin Ruhlin from
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Bridge Media, and Craig Bruce is our executive producer. If
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: you'd like more info about how you can make it
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: family happier, visit us at happy families dot com. You
• 17:00
  Speaker 3: and have a great weekend. Hm