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Bewitched - Breaking the Spell After Spiritual Mentoring Goes Wrong - Nicole's Story · Reclaiming Consciousness

• 0:03
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Reclaiming Consciousness.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_02: I'm Elise Bassine, trauma and breath work expert, and creator of the Metamorphosis Method, the only methodology bridging the gap between spiritual healing and clinical trauma work.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_02: For many years, our consciousness has been hijacked by societal and cultural programming, religion, the media, and familial and ancestral trauma.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_02: In this podcast, you'll discover my unique perspective on trauma healing and how it is the gateway to fully reclaiming your consciousness.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_02: You'll hear stories and teachings that expand your mind as you discover how every relationship challenge, business block, or limiting pattern is an invitation to reclaim the parts of your consciousness you unknowingly gave away.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_02: Get ready to go deep.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_02: Now let's dive in.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_02: Hi everyone, welcome back to the show.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_02: So the series continues.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, with all of the women we have, I think each of them share a very unique perspective that I think is important to consider, especially when we're looking at the patterns that have come up across all of the episodes and that you'll see continuing.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_02: And then also, why do these patterns quote unquote work with people?
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_02: And to me, one of the biggest reasons why is unacknowledged or unhealed trauma.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm gonna go more into that as we progress.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: And also just like in my work in general, one of the reasons why it's so important to do the deeper trauma work is so that something like this doesn't happen, whether you're the client or the mentor.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_02: Because when there is unhealed trauma present and unacknowledged wounding, patterns of manipulation can show up very easily.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_02: And from my perspective, that's why the trauma work is so important.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_02: So, speaking of that, the Sacred Money Mind is starting April 1st.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm so excited to see so many of you signing up.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_02: It's really fun to see all the signups coming in.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_02: So this is specifically to heal your core wound around money and to pinpoint exactly how you're projecting your core wound onto your relationship with money so that you can change your relationship with money permanently.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_02: So if you have a core wound of I'm not enough, you would unconsciously project that onto money, always creating just enough or not quite enough, or always being afraid of not having enough.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: And if you continue to repeat the same patterns around money, no matter what work you've done, whether it's money manifestation work or reprogramming your money story, whatever it is, none of that will truly land until you pinpoint and dissolve the core wound that you are projecting onto money.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_02: And through this work, my clients have created completely different realities with money and myself as well.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_02: I never imagined that I would have a business where I make this much money.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_02: When I was a school counselor, I could never have imagined that.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_02: And I wouldn't have been able to get to this place if it wasn't for this core wound process.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_02: So in the sacred money mine, you'll learn my simple inner child healing process to pinpoint and dissolve your core wound so that you no longer project it on to your relationship with money.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_02: And then magically your relationship with money completely changes, and you'll notice new opportunities showing up, more money coming in, new clients coming in, promotions, raises, all the things.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_02: My clients have experienced all of it.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_02: So you can sign up now for only$33.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_02: When you sign up, you'll receive digital content that you can binge like a podcast.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_02: And then the live portion, the five-day telegram broadcast, will start on April 1st.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm so excited.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_02: I love teaching this, and I can't wait to help you completely, permanently change your money story.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_02: This week we have Nicole.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_02: You guys are gonna love this episode.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_02: Nicole is amazing.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: She is super talented, super successful, and she has a very unique perspective on her experience with Betty, which I think you're gonna find very informative and highly entertaining.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_02: So without further ado, enjoy the episode.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: Hi everyone, welcome back to the show.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_02: So we are doing another interview for our Bewitched series, Recovering from When Spiritual Mentoring Goes Wrong.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm so excited for today's guest because her story is probably gonna be just unique and probably entertaining.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_02: So we have Nicole Sheree Hess on the show with us.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Nicole.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_02: So great to be here.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_02: Kinda, right?
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: Kinda.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: I said it's like getting the band back together too.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's good to see you.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's nice to see you too.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_02: It's really good to see you.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_02: So let's just dive right in.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_02: First of all, thank you for being willing to do this.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_02: I know this is something that's not the most like fun or comfortable conversation, but it's also just something that we're realizing more and more as we go through it that needs to happen and the the truth needs to come out.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_02: I actually learned a lot from you just listening to you talk about it when I was still in it, because I think you were able to see certain things that I wasn't, being that I was in it for so long and you were like newer coming in.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_02: And now looking back, I'm really like aware that your perception of it was accurate.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_02: So let's just dive in.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_02: Can you take us back to how you found her, Betty, and then how you decided to work with her and like that whole experience?
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: So let's go back a couple of years.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_01: I I have an already very successful business.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_01: I did seven figures in my first year.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_01: I have a pretty large, substantial Facebook group.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_01: I've bought from lots of coaches.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_01: This is not my first time.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_01: This is not a virginity story, right?
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: I've I've bought from lots of mostly men though, right?
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_01: I bought from a lot of male coaches.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: And so I started to feel this feeling, right?
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: Where I was like, I'm coaching women, like maybe I should buy from a woman.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so I kind of started shopping in that field, right?
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_01: I have not really exposed to a lot of the female spiritual entrepreneurs.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: That was just not my lineage.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_01: I came through like Russell Brunson and like the bro marketers and had a lot of success with them.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I've always worked with men in capacity of my other businesses.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: So it seemed like a good fit, right?
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: But then I started to feel that feeling where I was like, maybe I should.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: It was a should feeling.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: So that was already in me a little bit, like the nagging.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_01: And so I started to shop coaches and I actually bought from somebody else first.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: I bought from another female coach and had a really bad experience.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: Luckily, I didn't like go into the deep end of this.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_01: I like just put my toe in it.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_01: I spent like 10K for like a six-week one-on-one, only to find out that this woman was absolutely lying about her numbers, which putting your numbers up with American dollars when it's really New Zealand dollars is bullshit.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's and I cannot believe that people get away with this shit.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_01: It makes me so fucking mad.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: But so I had that experience and I was kind of like, oh, gunshot, no more women, like I don't want to do this again.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so I got a bad taste in my mouth.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: But I was like, maybe this is me being reactive, like maybe this is a lesson that I need to learn.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_01: And so I leaned back in, right?
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_01: And so I just started shopping a little bit, but she actually reached out to me, right?
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: So I didn't know her or see her or any of these things, but I'm very visible.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: Like I'm very much like at the time, I was very much on the rise, right?
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_01: It was like very like exploding kind of energy where everybody was saying my name a lot of times with torches and pitchforks because I have a little bit of an unpopular narrative.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_01: But she reached out to me and she actually booked me onto her podcast, right?
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: And this is before I knew anything about her.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: I knew absolutely nothing about the brand.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_01: I did zero research.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_01: I just got onto the podcast because I did podcasts all the time, right?
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_01: It was no big deal.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_01: So I got on, did a podcast episode with her.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_01: Everything was seemingly fine.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_01: There was nothing suspicious, there was nothing weird about this.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: It was just a normal podcast interview.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: And she was very kind and very nice.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: And that was the end of it.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: We got off the episode, I went about my merry way.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: And then about three or four months later, I see her name popping up in my Facebook group all the time, like just all the time, right?
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like she's commenting on everything, she's posting, she's just really, really involved, which at the time is not suspicious.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: That's normal.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's what people do in my Facebook group because people are getting clients from my Facebook group, right?
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_01: And so I just saw it more and more and more.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: Then she reaches out to me.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: I really feel like this might be something that maybe we could have an opportunity to work together.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I kind of like schlepped it off.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not big on like collaboration, and I know that sounds terrible, but I'm just not.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_01: I have a very successful brand, I do it by myself, like have a big fucking audience, and I don't need to use somebody else along the way.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_01: And especially with women, I have a lot of those kind of stories where women fuck me over.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have a lot of good girl stories, right?
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: So I'd ignored it.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_01: But then I put out a post where I was literally seeking a coach, right?
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_01: It was like a like a help-wanted ad, right?
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_01: Like a better thing.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, I want them to be making eight figures, I want them to be female, I want them to be in the spiritual realm, blah, blah, blah, put all these listicles out.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_01: And she reaches out to me.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_01: This seems like me.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, okay.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, we got onto a call.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_01: We had about it turned into about a 90-minute call, like sales call-ish thing, but not in the way that I've ever done a sales call.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: But also I've never really worked with women.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, maybe this is just how bitches do it, and I just don't know.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: The naivete kind of came in.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: And that call, looking back, was extremely unethical, like by what the standards are of like how I would present sales, right?
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: On a sales call, we're not coaching, right?
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: Because you don't have permission to coach on a sales call.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: No one has paid you.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: There's no agreement, there's nothing here.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_01: You shouldn't be digging into your deepest, darkest secrets on a sales call kind of situation, because that is exploitation, right?
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: I would never do that with my clients, but I thought maybe I was wrong.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, she's making more money than me.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_01: And she's been doing this for years.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: So she started digging into your deepest, darkest secrets on the sales conversation.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, in the actual sales conversation.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_01: And Robin, you know me, to be honest, all my deepest, darkest stuff is pretty much out there on the internet, right?
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's on my podcast.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: And so this was not like super sensitive things, like in the fact that the things that I've never shared, but it's things that weren't particularly, I think, relevant for a sales conversation.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: But she asked the question, what am I gonna do?
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: Not answer it.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_01: Of course I'm gonna answer it.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_01: So it turned into very much like a coaching session.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so then at the end of that, she presented a RevShare deal.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I've never done RevShare.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: That's just not something that I've ever done.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_01: And so it was exciting, right?
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: It was something that was new where I was like, oh, I've never even considered that.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_01: I've never done it with my clients and I've never done it with anybody else.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: I was already very successful.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_01: I was already making six figures a month.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_01: If she can take it to$500,000 a month, like that's good for her, it's good for me.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody wins.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_01: There was a deal presented where I had two options, right?
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: To either pay the full price or to pay the price plus Rev share, right?
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so this was a pretty significant investment.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: Are we talking about numbers?
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: Are we not talking about numbers?
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: I think especially for you, because you have such a strong and clear ethic around numbers.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_00: I think that this is an important part of the conversation.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: The Rev share presented was$8,000 a month flat, like with no Rev share, right?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: So$8,000 a month for nine months or$5,000 a month plus the percentage of increase, right?
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: So the percentage of increase on that was is sliding scale, right?
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_01: So up to a certain point, it was between 10 and 20%, just depending on the slide of like how much it was.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: I went with the rep share on this because I thought it was interesting and I was like, I've never done anything like that.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in the middle of a business.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: This is not a new business, right?
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: So I continue doing all the things that I normally am doing.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: And in the first three weeks, of course, I had an onboarding call with her, but I hadn't had the group call with you guys yet.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: There was onboarding call, and then there was the group call, and then I could book a certain amount of one-on-one sessions.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so I did the onboarding, which was like four hours, which was really intense.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: And then it didn't change anything in my business.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: There was no structure change, there's nothing.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: It was just her getting to know me.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like that, that's all.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: And so I continued and doing what I normally do in my business.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: And the next month, in that same sequence when I hired her, I made$300,000 that month.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_01: But to be clear, that was$300,000 that was going to come in anyways.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I'm saying?
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: These were not people who were new in my funnel.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't have an explosion of audience development, nothing.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: And so I paid out quarterly revenue share.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: And so that first quarterly hit, I was like, oh, this is a lot of money.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: I paid a lot of money because the percentage of increase was really high.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't understand.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't really fully get my head around what that was going to mean because of course it was the percentage of increase from last year's numbers.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_01: That's a rollover.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_02: Like there's two things that come to mind.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_02: One around the rev share.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_02: The thing that I'm thinking about is she had no way of tracking whether that was coming from her.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_02: Like I feel like that would make sense if the revenue increase was directly related to things that she helped you implement or helped you set up or whatever.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_02: But then it's like her to me, okay, so now you just have to pay her like$30,000 or whatever the hell it was.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: And it had nothing to do with her.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_02: So that's one thing.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_02: And then the other thing, too, before you get too deep in actually working with her, I know that she presented what you were coming into, maybe in a way that was not necessarily the case, or she told you about results other clients were having that you came to find out were not true.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: So it was like an astounding amount of money for that first quarter, right?
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was an initial like gut punch, but I'm the kind of person who does what the say, what I say I'm gonna fucking do.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_01: I signed a contract.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: She had no way of knowing what my last year numbers were.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: I could have lied, but I'm never gonna be that person.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_01: So I just paid the money.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's just who I am.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: But when we were on that call and in the closing of this, she presented you guys as multi-six-figure month earners.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_01: She told me that you were consistently making 200k a month.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: And like that, all of you guys were making that.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_00: So did she say specifically Elise and I were, and all of us in that group were okay.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_01: She said everybody in the group was a seven-figure earner.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_01: She told me specifically said Elise's name and said Elise is making$200,000 a month consistently.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: That is not true, by the way.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_01: And she knew that wasn't true.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I was told.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_01: So that was what I was looking for.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: To be fair, I put it up on a sheet and said what I was looking for.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: So she just read it back to me.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_02: So she basically just told you the things that you wanted, even though they were not true and not what you were getting.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: I was very, very surprised to hear you guys' income levels after I met you and like we had personal conversations and what you guys told me were the income levels.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_01: Now, of course, I'm never going to be a cunt about that, but that felt terrible to me because I was like, that's not what I was told, like in any capacity.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you had been misled from the beginning that on the revenue for the business owners in that group.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: How did that change your relationship with Betty or how you were interacting with her?
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it took me a minute to figure that out.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't know that coming right in the door.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like we got onto group coaching calls and then you guys announced your revenues.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_01: So it took me a little bit of time and quite honestly, like a little bit of a mindfuck because I watch you guys' behaviors.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: I obviously have clients that are at your revenue levels.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_01: And so like I saw a lot of behavior patterns that are very similar to my clients, not to like people that I've been in coaching containers with.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, they're making this amount of money, behaving this way, and having this kind of funnel and this kind of audience.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how are they doing that?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how are you like, how do you have this small of an audience and this kind of business with this kind of funnel structure?
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_01: And you are making$200,000 a month.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_01: I must be completely missing something.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_01: And so it made me really question myself and what I'm doing wrong.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: You guys will be like, they're lying.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: I believed her.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like I had no reason not to.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_01: And so it made me feel the feeling of like lower on the total pole where I was like, oh, I'm a stupid person.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_01: Like everybody in here is smarter than me.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: That is exactly why I'm here.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like I need to learn this stuff because these women are all making way more money than me with way smaller audiences and way less funnel development than I have.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I need to shut up and learn.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so it like really put me into establishing the gap.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: And so rather than challenging her, which I mean, in hindsight, what is what the fuck I should have done, right?
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_01: But like in that moment, I didn't feel qualified to challenge her.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_01: I felt knocked down a fucking peck.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: I'm having so much emotional response to this right now because I didn't know all of these this was going on behind the scenes.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I didn't know until more recently, one of our conversations.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's very uncouth to walk into a container full of women, and especially when you're not very comfortable with women, and just be like, put your striper seats out.
• 16:53
  unknown: Right?
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like, that's not an appropriate behavior pattern.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: And especially because I was already walking in there from a place of apprehension.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's already very intimidating for me to walk into a room full of women.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: And she knew that, right?
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_01: And she knew those things because I openly and candidly shared those things.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: And she also knew that a big part of what I was purchasing and like what I wanted was this level.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to be around other people who were at this level because quite honestly, I know it sounds like a bitch when I say this, but like when I go into coaching containers, most of the time I ascend so quickly to the top of that container that I end up coaching the whole fucking container.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in there and people are asking me questions and like they guise it under a mastermind when air quotes mastermind, but it's not a mastermind if I'm coaching your clients while I'm paying you, which is what normally happens in coaching containers for me.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I told her these were the specific words.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_01: I want to be the smallest fish in the room.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_01: I'm buying into a space where I want to be the smallest fish in the world room, and that's why I'm willing to pay so much money.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's because I want access to people who are doing three times, five times, 10 times what I'm doing.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_02: It just blows my mind how she just straight up lied about that because didn't she think you were gonna figure it out eventually?
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_02: She definitely banked on the fact that I would be too scared to ask, I guess.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_02: Well, most people are too scared to ask.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_02: And I think you were for a little bit.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, it's disrespectful, I think, to ask.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_01: If somebody asked me that question, I would be like, do you think you are?
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and you had no reason to think she was lying in the beginning.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_02: But then the first pattern that I'm noticing that you are saying is that you then gaslight yourself.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what everyone does is there must be something wrong with me because they're able to make two, three hundred grand a month with no funnels really, and small audiences.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_02: Like, so now you're like, oh, I must be doing this all wrong.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_02: There must be something wrong with me, which is the whole thing that literally every single person says is that they felt like it was them and they gaslit themselves and made themselves wrong.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_02: So that is totally in alignment with the pattern that everybody is experiencing.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: All of this is very much reminiscent of the whole narcissist thing, right?
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_01: And like the narcissistic behavior patterns, which I'm no stranger to, and like I definitely know that I have attracted this many times in my life, but this was just like a whole different echelon.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_01: It was a whole different level of mastery.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: It also occurs to me, Nicole, that given what you're telling me about small audiences and big revenues, she didn't have a huge audience.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, at least not one that I could see.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_01: And that was the thing too, is like she also she told me that there was a tier above you guys.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_01: Oh like eight and nine figures.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_01: She told me that.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, wow.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_02: No idea.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_02: These must be the same mysterious people that she says make$350,000 in a day or whatever.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_02: Those people, like that must be where the container that those people are in.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: Can't rule it out.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe in another dimension.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: But what occurs to me is that I hired her years ago because of what I was seeing, what she was saying, she was doing in her business, and I wanted to do that.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: And so this whole thing is like a house of cards, isn't it?
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's all fallen down based on her presentation of her own business and then how she presented her top-level mastermind as well.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: It was all smoke and mirrors, it feels like to me at this point.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_01: For you to say that you have this mysterious group of people that can't be named because they are so high profile that we can't talk about their names.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: And she was telling me stories, and they were they're incredible stories.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_01: But honestly, I have an incredible story.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_01: You don't go around making a million dollars in your first year, nobody fucking does that.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_01: She leveraged my belief in myself to help me to believe in something that was much bigger than me.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: But because I think that the average person probably wouldn't have believed those tales, but because my story is so extraordinary, and obviously I believe my own story because I lived it, she was able to effectively leverage that and it works.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_01: It worked hook like line and sinker.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like I was like, this is exactly what I want.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: But she sold me lesson in sales and marketing kids.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: Tell people what they want, right?
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: And she did.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: She she sold me exactly what I wanted.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_00: I've been studying cults.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_00: So I've been watching The Vow, which is about the Nexium scandal.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: But anyway, one of the things that has come through in me studying that particular storyline is how the leader is always going to play on the followers' greatest hopes and dreams.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: And to have this effusive and grandiose vision that we can tap into.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's, I think as visionaries, that's what we want anyway, is for somebody just to believe us that we have that big a vision and to be able to step into that.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: But ultimately, it becomes about coercion and control and manipulation and lying and deceit.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: And so there's all of these other things that play into it behind the scenes that we're not aware of.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_00: All we're doing is believing that, oh my gosh, somebody believes in our vision, somebody believes in something that is possible for me.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_00: And that feels really good.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: It feels very elating, at least it did to me.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: But then we look at the information that you're bringing forward, Nicole, and the behind the scenes.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Scenes and we see something that's very dark and quite I'll use the word devious.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: Do you have any thoughts on that?
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_01: There were things, and I think we'll get to this in the timeline of things where like I definitely knew that this was what was happening.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: And like the cult leader pieces of this, like as we were in person, things are a lot harder harder to hide in person.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_01: But over the internet, like it's pretty easy to position those smoke and mirrors in such a way, right?
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: In person, I definitely hit the markers of cult, cult, cult, cult, cult.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_01: And honestly, my husband was on this why not rice, right?
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_01: He was like, This woman is a cult leader.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_01: What are you doing?
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_01: He was not on board with this at all from the start.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: I was kind of like, baby, like you just don't understand the woo girls, right?
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_01: You just don't get it.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_01: And he was like, after I came back from being in person, he was like, No, no, no, you don't get it, right?
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so he was very much, very much knowing that, like right from the beginning.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think that that definitely helped and played a factor in in my awareness pieces of this.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_01: But in the beginning portion, that's the whole kind of mark of a cult, isn't it?
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's kind of what they say about domestic violence, is like nobody gets punched on the first date, right?
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_01: They bring you in from the love bombing.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_01: They bring you in from telling you exactly what you want to hear, and you get to feel that feeling of someone really believing with you in this big giant vision and also very much supporting who you are in that vision.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm very candid.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_01: I tell people my story right from the get.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so she was able to extract different pieces from that story and very much lace it in in a very beautiful way.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_01: It was a very beautiful presentation that definitely, in a lot of ways, helped me to believe in myself.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: And so you give that credit to that person in the beginning, and you're like, oh no, this person is good for me.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_01: This person really helps me.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I mean, that's how they gain your trust.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I totally know.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_02: And and and you're not the first person that has said that, too, that she helped you have this deeper belief in yourself.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_02: So then take us through.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_02: So then you come in, you start working with her.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_02: And did you learn anything?
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how did that all start to unfold as you started working with her?
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to kind of preface this with the fact that again, I already had a very successful business.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_01: This wasn't a situation where like I didn't need help building an audience, building a funnel, like with marketing or sales.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm good at all of those things, right?
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_01: I made consistent six-figure months.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_01: I've I've had higher months than that 300k month, right?
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't need strategy.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I didn't buy for strategy, right?
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_01: I bought for the intrinsic kind of deeper work, where it was like becoming the person and looking at those things inside of me that are, you know, maybe sneaky and holding me back in ways that I don't fucking know, right?
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_01: A lot of this, the work was really more centralized around my childhood.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_01: And she told me that she was uh, I'm gonna kind of butcher like the exact title on this, but basically, like the general thing is that she was uh she was like a detective.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, in my brain, I'm going to like straight to Olivia Benson, like SBU.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: She she told me she was Olivia Benson.
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_01: She told me that that she was a detective and worked for the government, specifically with children who had been victims of sex crimes, which that is my experience, right?
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_01: And like I went through that as a child.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_01: And so this was immediately like one of those covalent bonds that forms where I was like, oh, this person is gonna be able to help me in ways that nobody else would be able to help me having that kind of experience.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like when people hear my story, they're horrified, right?
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_01: But if somebody's been through has that job, like they're not gonna be horrified by my story.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like my story is gonna seem very benign, and I'm not gonna have that like shock that I have to go through with so many coaches that I work with.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh my God, that's so terrible for you.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_01: And the pity stories that I just I hate.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_01: I want to get to the root of solving it and the solutions.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not a big wall in my trauma person.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I want to move beyond it.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_01: And so I really thought that that was something that was very special, where I was like, this is the person because she has this kind of experience.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I never followed that up.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't Google her name.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't go and look for all of those things.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_01: And now, as I hear the stories presented from you guys' angles, I don't know if that is true.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_01: Can you Google that?
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: I think that one of the reasons I hired her is because of her background and credentials.
• 25:56
  SPEAKER_00: You know, with my PhD in psychology and and all the work that I have done, I felt like I needed somebody like her who had that kind of education and training.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: And then on top of it, if she was actually doing the social work at that level that she says she was, aka Olivia Benson, which it's interesting, she gave you a superstar to anchor into.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_00: She didn't say that.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_00: That was me.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_00: But that's interesting that that even came forward because I had never thought of that.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: But that's a perfect archetype for how she wanted to present this.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: But one of the things that I struggle with is she talked about being like 23 or 24 and having these really extreme cases.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_00: Listen, nobody puts a 23 or 24-year-old out onto those cases.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: I just, that's something that I wanted to believe because I thought she was smart and she seemed to have all of this story.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: But at the end of the day, I think, is that even possible that a 23 or 24-year-old would be out there doing and supervising cases of that extreme nature, which she, by the way, would very willingly share in certain contexts in order to probably evoke vicarious trauma, actually.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: But she would say she was doing it for a purpose.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that to me was like a it was a big selling point, right?
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I mean for sure.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_01: Having gone through things like that, very few people understand, and very few people can be constructively helpful in that department because it's a capacity thing.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_01: If you don't have that kind of training and if you don't have that kind of background, like it's it's very challenging to work with people in that capacity.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_02: I just wanted to say also, because I'm like reflecting on this now, because the way she presented it to me, whatever that thing was that she said she did, she presented it to me in a way that like she knew I would relate to as school counselor because I was a school counselor and I I did actually work with hundreds of traumatized children, seriously traumatized children, and I saw really fucked up shit.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_02: But she related it to me in like that way, where I don't think she said detective, I think she said social work or something that like I would relate to.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_02: So who knows what it was, but it's interesting the way that it was said to all of us in the way that we would feel the most connection or trust with her.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_01: I think that there's a way to do that that is not at all malicious.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I'm saying?
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_01: Of course, like yeah, every client I've ever worked with, I have a ton of things that I've done.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_01: And if you come to me and you're like, hey, I have this set of circumstances where I have a hospitality background, I'm gonna be like, oh yeah, me too.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna naturally create like bridges of connection based on our experience and how we could best serve somebody.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_01: I worked with casinos and did, you know, million and billion dollar consulting gigs for these people.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be able to tie that into somebody who used to be a bartender, right?
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so I don't think that there's really anything unethical about bridging a connection.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_01: But what I hear after I talk to other people, like outside of that, is I don't think it's true.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I'm saying?
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_01: Is I don't think those things actually happened.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_01: I think that they are conveniently positioned in such a way where there's enough plausible deniability that like you believe it.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: And then as long as you don't really talk to anybody else about it, you can't create the triangulation.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's the biggest point is that of course we're gonna make connections with our clients and find places in our backgrounds where we can relate and so on.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_00: That's important for the no like and trust factor.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_00: And yet when it comes to at least you've talked about too, the the trauma-informed or or positioning herself as a trauma-informed expert, that's where we get into some shifty territory, in my opinion.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: Did you find she helped you, Nicole, with that aspect of your work?
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: This is the thing that happened very, very quickly.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_01: She went after my mom.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_01: Guys, I know my story.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_01: She never sold any of the trauma-informed shit to me because she knows I'm not on that fucking side of that fence, right?
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_01: I don't believe in that crap, right?
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so she presented all these pieces, we talked about it, but her initial positioning of this was actually vilifying my mother.
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, in the story, my dad is the bad guy.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, like that's how that goes.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: But like my mom, when all of this was happening, my mom was 19 years old.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: And now I'm 40.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_01: You look at a 19-year-old, like a tiny child, right?
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so when I look back at that story, like I know that my mother was not the villain in this story.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: My mother was just as much a victim as I was, and she was doing everything that she could to protect me.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_01: Now, she was not a saint and she made mistakes, right?
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_01: But they were 19-year-old mistakes.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_01: And let's all wait and raise our hand for all those of us who didn't make mistakes when we were 19 years old.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: Come on.
• 30:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so she very much vilified my mom and used the word narcissist in correlation with my mother, which I know for a fact my mother is not a narcissist.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_01: She's a lot of things, but she is not a narcissist in any capacity, right?
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_01: That is not part of her story.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_01: And so I let that go.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_01: I watched, and that was like my red flag, right?
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_01: Where I was like, oh, she's using some keywords.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so because I've been in narcissistic abuse relationships before, like I'm more familiar than I care to admit with this style of manipulation.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_01: And it has worked on me before.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, you don't let it work again.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_01: And so once she started going after my mother, like I started to withdraw from this, right?
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_01: Where I was like, oh, she definitely doesn't know as much as she thinks she does or as much as she presents she does.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_01: And so this is where like my spidey senses started to tingle.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_01: So I started to pull back in that moment, right?
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_01: Where it was like, oh, you don't know what you think you know.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I didn't say anything because I know that as soon as you attack a narcissist and identify a hole, that they will flip it over, right?
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_01: And so I didn't identify the hole for her, I just sat back and waited.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_01: And so none of that work ever actually did anything for me because I wasn't doing the work in all of that because I already knew something was wrong in that capacity.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_01: And quite honestly, I've had a lot of people try and help me with this.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_01: It's not something that like a lot of people are qualified to help for.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm never surprised when people get to like the shallow end of their pool and that's all they can get to is like, oh, well, your mom was a narcissist.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, my mom was 19.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_01: She's not a narcissist, she was in over her fucking head with someone who definitely was a narcissist.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_01: She was so inaccurate.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_01: I couldn't continue the trust path with that subject matter, if that makes sense.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: It also occurs to me the pattern that we're seeing is that there's always a point of division between the client and trusted family members.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_02: Always.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_00: I've seen you and your mom have done so much together in your work, and she's your she's like your ride or die.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_00: And so when there's that wedge that starts being pushed in between somebody who you care about in the way that you do and and who's integral in your life, that's a red flag, first of all, but it's definitely the pattern that we've seen emerge over these conversations.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_02: Then how did you reconcile continuing on with her?
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_02: Because I actually can very much relate to that because she would try to do that with my mom too.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: And I do think my mom has narcissistic tendencies.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_02: I don't call her a full-on narcissist, and I'm not really attached to that either.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't even care about that.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_02: But she would do, she would try to like act like she knew the story between me and my mom, and then she would say it and like it wasn't right.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_02: But I would just not really say anything because I would just be like, okay, whatever, and just move on.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_02: But she would like not nail it at all.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_02: And I would be like, Okay, you don't really know what you're talking about, but okay, and I would just let it go.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_02: So for you, how then did you reconcile within yourself, okay, I'm still gonna move forward with this person and I'm still gonna try to get what was that story in your mind, or how did you decide to look at it?
• 33:21
  SPEAKER_01: I think that this is something that is just a mark of a honest person.
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_01: Have I ever gotten it wrong with a client?
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_01: Of course.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_01: Have I ever thought that someone in their life was a narcissist and then I would be wrong about it?
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_01: Sure.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_01: I've made mistakes in my life.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not perfect.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not a perfect coach that knows everything.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not fucking omniscient.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't expect that of coaches.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_01: Coaches are fucking people, they're not deities, right?
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_01: So it's like I don't need her to be perfect in order to get results.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I'm saying?
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I create my own ROI in any in any set of circumstances.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: I create my own ROI, regardless of what that coach is or is not fucking doing.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_01: I'm here to learn a very specific skill set from somebody who's light years ahead of me, seemingly, right?
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_01: Like light years ahead of me when it comes to revenue generation.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not here to resolve my childhood trauma.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_01: I'm here to make money.
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I was here for.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's okay for her to miss that mark because quite honestly, I'm not gonna say it's fucking perfect, but I'm pretty much through that shit.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like I don't identify as a survivor.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like I'm I'm way beyond that.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't really need help with that.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_01: That's not what the underlying issue is for me that's stopping me from 10xing my fucking business.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_01: I wasn't attached to that.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't like what I came in there for.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_01: On to the next thing.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_01: So what?
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_01: She got it wrong.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not right about everything I say.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_02: So then you start to move forward, and then what else happens for you as you go through the container?
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_01: So the in-person event in San Diego was very shortly thereafter, right?
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like timeline-wise.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_01: Like I joined at the end of February, and then San Diego was May.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_01: This was very quickly.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_01: I had had, I think, one group call, maybe two group calls with you guys before that.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_01: At this point, I'm just barely getting to know you guys.
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_01: You guys were pretty welcoming, but not everybody in that room is, right?
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_00: Me too.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_00: I was so excited to meet you.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_01: I could feel that, but that was not how everybody was.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_01: There was definitely some resistance patterns, which was interesting in general.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_01: I had the couple calls with you guys, and then I decided to do this in-person experience.
• 35:12
  SPEAKER_01: And this in-person experience sounded cool.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, oh, wolf sanctuary, like all the things.
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_01: I was like so excited.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, this is gonna be amazing.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_01: And like I was excited to get in person with you guys and feel the proximity.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_01: I've had really good experiences in person, like with my previous coaches, where I was like, I just really like in-person work, right?
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_01: So I knew that that was coming up.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_01: And of course I got on the plane, right?
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_01: Of course I got on the plane, I paid the money for it, which I think at this point she definitely charges different people different prices for all of her stuff, which I definitely really realized because I paid 10K for that, which is not what I think you guys paid.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_01: So I thought that's interesting.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember what I paid, but I don't think it was 10K.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think it was, I don't remember it was not 10K though.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_00: I think it might have been five.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even think it was that much for me.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I think it was five.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_00: I could go back and look, but I don't think it was 5k for me.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm pretty positive.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_00: That's really funny.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_01: She knows I have the money, right?
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm an easy target because guys, I'm like, don't tell anybody else.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone's listening to this podcast, don't tell anyone you guys.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like the easiest sell in the world.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_01: If I want something, I just buy it.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_01: So I bought the thing, I got on the plane, came and met you guys.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_01: And so I had only had maybe two one-on-one calls with her at that point, right?
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_01: So like I had the onboarding and two one-on-one calls, two calls with you guys.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_01: So I was pretty fresh coming into all of this.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I so I had very little perspective as far as what results she was creating inside of the business.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_01: Nothing.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_01: You know, having somebody to talk to, and this was one of the most annoying things about her for me.
• 36:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's you guys, I hate Voxer.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_01: Voxer is like the nemesis of like, I don't know why any of you people fucking use that shit.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_01: Voxer is trash.
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_01: First of all, it deletes your messages, and isn't that convenient for her?
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_01: Some of the messages she left me, I wish I would have recorded.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_01: Like my support coach in my program was like, We should never record those messages.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_01: But we use Telegram.
• 36:59
  SPEAKER_01: We don't use Voxer for anything because we don't want messages being deleted.
• 37:02
  SPEAKER_01: So in Voxer, I would ask her questions.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_01: I have full access.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_01: I've paid for full access to this.
• 37:07
  SPEAKER_01: And so every time I had a question about anything in Voxer, she would be like, This is a long answer.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_01: So we need to get on a call for that.
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to get on a fucking call.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_01: Like the whole point of me buying this fucking thing was that I would have instant access because I don't like being on Zoom calls for hours on end, right?
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I like doing?
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_01: Working and serving and helping my clients and making money.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_01: I can't do that if I'm sitting on a four-hour call with you.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was very annoyed with that.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_01: And like literally every time I would ask any question about anything, it was like, well, we need to get on a call for that.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_01: Why can't you just answer me right now?
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_01: Retroactively is because she didn't know, right?
• 37:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like she didn't know the answers to the questions that I was asking her because she didn't really have those results, right?
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_01: So I could see that delay point.
• 37:46
  SPEAKER_01: But when we got in person, I had a very strange experience on the plane.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know if I ever, I thought I ever told you guys this.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_01: Did I tell you guys this?
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, maybe you did, but maybe you did briefly, but remind us.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: So when I was on the plane, I was sitting next to a flight attendant.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_01: So someone that's like going to their last hub.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_01: And so there's just a lot of turbulence, right?
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like dropping in, like there was just a ton of turbulence.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_01: It was a pretty short flight for me, but it was just really, really bumpy.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, nobody likes that.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_01: So I was like, but I'm sitting next to a flight attendant.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_01: So this lady's gonna be nice to me and make me feel better.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: No, this lady was like, she looked me down in the eye and she was like, What are you gonna do?
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: Fly the plane, you might as well just relax.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_01: There's nothing you can do about turbulence.
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_01: Even if it does fall out of the sky, there's nothing you can do.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_01: You're not a pilot.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh, burn, right?
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_01: Very interesting experience in uh feminine energy and surrender, surrendering, right?
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_01: But literally the entire time I was on the plane, I'm gonna sound like a fucking nut junk when I say this, but I was sitting there, and you know, like the vents where the air conditioning comes out, like those circles.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_01: So the whole time, I swear to God, you guys, I felt like there were raindrops, drips of water dripping onto my leg.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_01: I like kept touching the thing, and there's no water.
• 38:53
  SPEAKER_01: You guys, there's nothing.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_01: There's absolutely nothing.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_01: There's no water like on my leg, I can feel the plop of the drop.
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_01: I can even like hear it, but then it's not wet, right?
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, I'm having a fucking psychotic break.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm losing it.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_01: What is going on?
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_01: Here is there not enough oxygen in the plane.
• 39:08
  SPEAKER_01: What is going on?
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was really like weirded out by that.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_01: I just felt like I was, I don't know, turbulently shifting into another dimension.
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I've watched Lost too many times or something, right?
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_01: But it was a very, very strange flight.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_01: And I'll remember that feeling for the rest of my life because I felt so weird.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember getting into the airport and talking to my support coach when I got there, and I was like, I'm just weirded out.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_01: And she's like, just go with it, just lean into it.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_01: This is just a different level of awareness that's coming in for you.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_01: Just allow it and get in there.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_01: But I'm really, that's just your fucking spidey sense, right?
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_01: So we get to this hotel, and by the way, okay, that hotel was expensive, and it was like a motherfucking La Quinta.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_01: So let's start with that.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_01: Why are we at this shitty ass hotel?
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_01: First of all, I am a bougie ass bitch, I make millions of dollars, I don't stay in fucking shitty hotels, right?
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was pretty pissed about that because those hotel rooms were like$600 a night.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_01: Like it was fucking nuts.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, we get to this shitty hotel, and I'm like, I don't like this.
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_01: Then this experience begins.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know what I was expecting, but I will tell you it was not that.
• 40:07
  SPEAKER_01: I definitely did not expect that because I thought we were coming for a mastermind.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_01: I thought we were here to make money.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think we're here to have this fucking conversation about how to like elevate our business and our money mindset and all of these things, right?
• 40:17
  SPEAKER_01: But the big red flag, like Robin in Coltland, okay.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_01: And I know you guys heard me viciously bitching about this.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_01: This bitch did not feed us.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_01: You guys, you do not have 10 clients come to location and do not plan meals.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_01: That is not a thing.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_01: That is not ethical.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody does that.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_01: There's no excuse.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_01: And this is like for me was like, I was like not having that shit.
• 40:36
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone was kind of like, it's okay.
• 40:37
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, this is not okay.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_01: You don't ever do this.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_01: You don't ever invite somebody, I mean, invite somebody to your fucking house and not offer them a fucking drink and a snack.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_01: This is not okay.
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_01: But from a cult perspective, it's brilliant.
• 40:49
  SPEAKER_00: High control, and it's an automatic alteration in consciousness because now you're reliant on the leader to tell you when you can eat, what you can eat.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_00: And there was never enough.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even remember what we had at that one because I was at a couple others, but there was maybe tea available.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even remember, but it was ongoingly and consistently very, very limited food.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_00: I remember she stopped at a supermarket on the way back from the wolves and picked up like chips and that stupid free popcorn or whatever.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know what that is.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I just wanted to say to the retreats that I've led, the reason why I had them both at retreat centers is because when you have them at a retreat center, they make all the meals for you.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_02: Everything is there, and you don't have to worry about that.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_02: But when you have it at a hotel, it's like that is a big deal to plan meals and all that.
• 41:44
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not saying it can't be done, but what I'm saying is as a retreat host, and Nicole, you lead retreats, don't you have it at a place that already provides meals because of that?
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_02: That you need to make sure that happens.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_01: 100% meals are like what you centralize everything else around.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_01: We need to provide spare meals for these people.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't do the retreat centers, but like I'm in hospitality.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: For us, like we had a private chef at every event we've ever done.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like, we have private chefs, we have food, we have snacks in between food.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't ever want anybody hungry, I don't ever want anybody thirsty because that is insane.
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't think that we're being like clear enough in like the fact that there was no food.
• 42:18
  SPEAKER_01: Literally, there was not breakfast provided.
• 42:21
  SPEAKER_01: There was no breakfast, and there was no time to get breakfast.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_01: That was not allowed.
• 42:24
  SPEAKER_01: It was like we immediately had to go and meet up, and we were told there was gonna be breakfast, and then there was not.
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_01: And then lunch, the first day was like it was a vegan lunch.
• 42:33
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not vegan.
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck you.
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_01: I need protein, I need meat, I don't eat fucking vegetables.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_01: Like broccoli is not lunch to me.
• 42:38
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck yourself.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_01: Good for you if you are a vegan.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_01: I am not a fucking vegan and I don't eat like that.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think anyone there was a vegan except for her.
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_00: So, to the larger picture though, Nicole, from what you were seeing with the food, a limited access to food, limited access to water.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_00: I want to go to the wolf sanctuary because you had a very, very interesting interpretation of what was going on there.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_01: We cannot say the word sanctuary.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_00: That is not sanctuary with something else.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness.
• 43:07
  SPEAKER_01: This was dogs in cages.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_01: Let's be clear.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_01: Let's not even pretend for a fucking second.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, this was unethical, trapped animals in cages.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_01: That is what this was.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_01: Sanctuary is an abomination of that of that word for this.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_01: And for me, this is what things were slipping.
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_01: As far as like the food thing goes, I have very little patience for people with lack of hospitality, but I'm also getting hangry, right?
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't have I don't have the patience in me.
• 43:31
  SPEAKER_01: And this was a very long drive, right?
• 43:33
  SPEAKER_01: It was a very long drive in this bus thing with no food, no water, nothing.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_01: And so we finally get out into the middle of Timbuktu, right?
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_01: There's nothing for miles and miles and miles.
• 43:45
  SPEAKER_01: We get out there, and this is supposed to be like a Native American like wolf sanctuary.
• 43:49
  SPEAKER_01: That is what is it supposed to be.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, I have a vision in my mind, as you probably listening, have a vision in your mind of what that looks like.
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_01: And I want you to immediately erase it because it is dogs in cages.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, like kennel cages, like chain link, terrible cages.
• 44:03
  SPEAKER_01: These animals look emaciated.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_01: They look absolutely fucking terrible.
• 44:07
  SPEAKER_01: They are definitely suffering.
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_01: You can see the suffering in the animal's eyes.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_01: And as we pull up to this place, this woman comes out and this woman is batshit crazy, you guys.
• 44:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't mean like in the crazy, like we're crazy, like we're woo girls, we're crazy.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_01: No, this woman is on meth.
• 44:22
  SPEAKER_01: I know meth when I see it.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_01: Like I have a vicious drug background.
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_01: I know meth when I see it.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_01: This woman is a meth head living in a trailer park and she has a bunch of wolves in cages.
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_01: That is what we're dealing with here.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_01: And for some reason, Betty thinks that it's okay that we're supposed to be like treating her like she's some hollowed princess.
• 44:38
  SPEAKER_01: No, this is bullshit, right?
• 44:40
  SPEAKER_01: As we walk into this space, like I'm immediately just more and more resistant, right?
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not having this crap at all.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not going along to get along, like I'm not supporting this.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_01: Like they were asking for money.
• 44:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like I was definitely, I'm not giving money to these methods.
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_01: That is not a thing.
• 44:55
  SPEAKER_01: And that woman, she had these like weird, clear, like crystal blue, like piercing kind of eyes.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_01: In my life, in my ripples of life, I have seen these eyes many, many times.
• 45:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I know that when I see those eyes, I pay attention, right?
• 45:07
  SPEAKER_01: There's something that captivates in that moment where you're like, you need to laser focus in, you need to turn on the hypervigilance, you need to listen to what's going on here.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_01: I almost felt like that crazy meth head woman was like warning us.
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_01: She didn't like Betty.
• 45:23
  SPEAKER_01: She was very resistant to Betty.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_01: And Betty was like kind of in that space of trying to like get her on her side and like all this stuff.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_01: And like it was not working.
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_00: Betty boxered me at like midnight, saying that the wolf lady had messed up our reservations and could I help?
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_00: So I was up all night.
• 45:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm already sleep deprived from being up all night doing energy work and grid work and doing all of these preparations.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_00: And then she wants me to massage the way or to soothe the way into the entree, into this place, because she and this woman are already having conflict.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_00: That was my perspective on that.
• 46:01
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm already exhausted and altered because how can I not be from all the things going on?
• 46:07
  SPEAKER_00: And so I was aware of your perspective, but I was also tired.
• 46:11
  SPEAKER_01: In what world do you wake a client up to go and handle some logistical error that you and your teammate?
• 46:17
  SPEAKER_00: In Betty's world, she would wake me up.
• 46:20
  SPEAKER_00: I had two tasks to do.
• 46:22
  SPEAKER_00: I did that all night.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_00: And oh, by the way, she didn't have enough money.
• 46:25
  SPEAKER_00: And could I go to the ATM and pick up money for her tomorrow?
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_00: And so she had me working from the time I got there.
• 46:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I think about that in my whole trajectory with her, how much she had me working, I think was a big distraction because if I had been full capacity in my intellect and my awareness, I wouldn't have missed everything that I missed.
• 46:46
  SPEAKER_02: Now you guys are like taking me back there.
• 46:48
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm like, okay, what was I doing?
• 46:50
  SPEAKER_02: Where was I?
• 46:52
  SPEAKER_02: At least what were you doing?
• 46:53
  SPEAKER_02: How I am too is like when somebody is like talking, I'm like with them.
• 46:57
  SPEAKER_02: Like I follow them, right?
• 46:59
  SPEAKER_02: And this woman, the mess head, whatever you want to call her, she was on some shit.
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_02: Like the first thing we she tells us when we step out of the bus is that an aircraft flew by the night before and looked like it was about to smash into the mountain, and then the mountains parted, and the aircraft flew in, and then the mountains closed.
• 47:19
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm still like processing that.
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_02: Or is this some area 51 shit?
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_02: What's going on here?
• 47:25
  SPEAKER_02: Are the aliens close by?
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_02: Like, what is happening?
• 47:28
  SPEAKER_02: And then she's telling all of these crazy stories, like in that ilk, like how she got into gun car chase with some guys, like so many things.
• 47:38
  SPEAKER_02: So I think I'm just like following her crazy and trying to like in my mind process like, is this real?
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_02: What is she on?
• 47:49
  SPEAKER_02: What's happening?
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_02: Because I was also a little bit like you, Nicole, where my hypervigilance kicks in and I'm like, are we safe?
• 47:55
  SPEAKER_02: So I need to pay attention to this woman and listen to every word she says to make sure, like, we're not in danger somehow.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's where my head was now that I'm like looking back on it.
• 48:06
  SPEAKER_01: We were definitely in a dangerous situation, in the way that meth situations are dangerous.
• 48:10
  SPEAKER_01: We were in the middle of a drug deal.
• 48:11
  SPEAKER_01: We're all adults, and we probably could have got ourselves out of any kind of that kind of situation with cops and whatever.
• 48:16
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like we're in a foreign country, we're still American citizens with American rights.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_01: But one, we're on a reservation, so that's a little bit limited.
• 48:22
  SPEAKER_01: But two, like they were just on meth.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's what that was.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_01: And she wanted to treat it like it was some spiritual experience.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_01: That is not spiritual experience.
• 48:28
  SPEAKER_01: That is people on meth with wolves and cages, and that is freaking not okay.
• 48:32
  SPEAKER_01: And that woman, I think that she, like, even through the methness, was like, this good bitch is bad news.
• 48:38
  SPEAKER_01: She pulled me aside, and I don't remember what the hell she said to me now.
• 48:41
  SPEAKER_01: I remember the eyes.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_01: She pulled me aside at one point and talked to me, and they didn't make any sense, but it was like a warning.
• 48:47
  SPEAKER_01: That's what it was.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_01: And then Betty pulled me aside and was like, What did she say to you?
• 48:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like trying to get me into that realm.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_01: And at that point, it was just going downhill.
• 48:54
  SPEAKER_01: And so she was like pissy with my attitude, right?
• 48:56
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, It seems like you have a lot of resistance.
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_01: It seems like you're really defensive.
• 48:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I'm not defensive, I'm fucking starving.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_01: I haven't eaten all fucking day.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_01: I've been in a fucking bus for fucking five hours.
• 49:05
  SPEAKER_01: And we are at a meth house.
• 49:07
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, what did I pay$2,000 for?
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_01: That's not defensiveness.
• 49:10
  SPEAKER_01: That's not resistance.
• 49:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's just common sense.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_01: What are we doing?
• 49:16
  SPEAKER_01: Bananas, dude.
• 49:17
  SPEAKER_01: And everyone else is just like going along with it.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_01: And then I and then that makes me feel like a fucking crazy person.
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, oh, I'm the crazy person because everyone else is like, oh, thank you, wolf medicine.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_01: What are we talking about?
• 49:27
  SPEAKER_01: What are we talking about?
• 49:28
  SPEAKER_02: I love animals.
• 49:29
  SPEAKER_02: I have a fucking husky.
• 49:31
  SPEAKER_02: Robin knows this.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_02: But like the whole like wolf medicine, Robin, no offense.
• 49:36
  SPEAKER_02: I love the horses uh in the way that I do, but I'm not into that.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_02: No, I know.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_02: It's not my thing.
• 49:42
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I don't get it.
• 49:42
  SPEAKER_02: Like when they gave me a clump of the wolf hair, I'm like, I fucking vacuum this shit up from my and I get that animals are sacred.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I love my fucking dog, I love animals, but I'm just not into that.
• 49:55
  SPEAKER_02: That wouldn't be the thing I choose to have a spiritual experience.
• 49:59
  SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
• 50:00
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, yeah, and I will say, you know me, I love my wolf medicine and I go up to the the Sedona wolf sanctuary and and my horse medicine and everything.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the thing, too, on a bigger picture, what we figured out is that she's siphoning everybody's energy from the wolves to each individual person who's there, siphoning our energies, taking our gifts and so on.
• 50:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I actually think that in hindsight, that's what she was doing with the wolves as well.
• 50:27
  SPEAKER_00: She was looking for activations, she said.
• 50:30
  SPEAKER_00: But I think that it was more siphoning the energy.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_00: And it also makes me think energetically, what was I actually doing the night before?
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_00: It may have been just like in Sedona, how do I want to say this?
• 50:43
  SPEAKER_00: I thought I was preparing the way for us, but I actually think it was more like protecting than anything else.
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I didn't know.
• 50:50
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't know.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like Nicole probably has something to say around like, let's talk about your ROI on the retreat and what business advice did you get?
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how did this retreat help your business?
• 51:02
  SPEAKER_02: Let's start there before we get into like the Star Wars night.
• 51:06
  SPEAKER_01: 100%.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_01: This is this was this was absolutely a waste of my time.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_01: This was a waste of my time.
• 51:11
  SPEAKER_01: This is a waste of my energy.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_01: This is not a business retreat.
• 51:14
  SPEAKER_01: This is not a money-making retreat.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_01: There was absolutely no business advice given.
• 51:17
  SPEAKER_01: The roundtable was a fucking joke.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_01: And watching her scream at that poor woman was probably one of the most challenging things that I've dealt with in this coaching realm, right?
• 51:28
  SPEAKER_01: Of all of these things, because that took a lot.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_01: That took a lot for me to fucking sit there.
• 51:33
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a pretty violent person, you guys.
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_01: I know you all know me in this fucking realm, but like back in the day, back in bartender lands, watching her get up in that girl's face and scream at her was fucking astounding.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_01: And then to watch that woman just take it, right?
• 51:46
  SPEAKER_01: And everybody just kind of like be like, what the fuck are we supposed to do at this point?
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I'm not gonna say that she wasn't out of line because in a lot of ways, like that woman needed to sit down and shut up for sure.
• 51:54
  SPEAKER_01: But she did not need to be talked to in that way, in any capacity, and especially not from someone who's like claiming trauma-informed or whatever.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_01: If you're trauma-informed and you're getting up and screaming in somebody else's fucking face, like you really know what the fuck you're doing, right?
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_01: You really know how much you're hurting that person.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_01: And doing it in a public setting like that was just absolutely insane.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_01: That woman did talk out of turn, that woman did need to pipe down for sure.
• 52:14
  SPEAKER_01: But there are better ways to control a situation.
• 52:17
  SPEAKER_01: And to spend what, 15 minutes apiece on getting coaching in a mastermind kind of situation, that was bullshit.
• 52:24
  SPEAKER_01: First of all, there was nobody in that room that was qualified to fucking coach me.
• 52:27
  SPEAKER_01: So that shit pissed me off.
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_01: But second of all, why would I be there coaching everybody else there and going through this thing with their business?
• 52:34
  SPEAKER_00: The best advice I got during that retreat was from you, Nicole.
• 52:37
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it's because it was the only advice.
• 52:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's not even like a bar that's high enough.
• 52:42
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate that comment, but no one else was fucking talking about advice.
• 52:47
  SPEAKER_02: And I feel like for me, just as I'm thinking about it, like that was the low point for me too, because I feel like I had worked with her for so long at that point, and it was like gradually getting worse.
• 52:57
  SPEAKER_02: Where I was like questioning myself a lot at that point.
• 53:00
  SPEAKER_02: And I feel like then at that retreat, I really got no help with my business.
• 53:05
  SPEAKER_02: It was literally the whole conversation I got was about the fact that like I accidentally took the car keys on the plane with me, and Matt was mad, and that was the whole fucking conversation about how he kept on trying to penetrate and why couldn't you just be left alone?
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_00: So there was a wedge being driven in there between you and Matt.
• 53:25
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, because she's like, Why you're making this about him or whatever?
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, he's like pissed at me, and I'm just saying it, you know.
• 53:33
  SPEAKER_01: If my husband would have taken the car keys and gone on a plane, I'd have been pissed too.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I get why he was mad.
• 53:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 53:40
  SPEAKER_01: But she was definitely vilifying him for that.
• 53:42
  SPEAKER_01: She was vilifying him for being upset.
• 53:45
  SPEAKER_01: That's a very reasonable thing to be upset about.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, of course.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_01: But that was like literally my whole turn was that.
• 53:53
  SPEAKER_01: I think that it was a total waste of my time.
• 53:55
  SPEAKER_01: And like I had no problem saying no to the next one because of this.
• 53:58
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was a total waste of my time and my money and my energy to go and play cult victim for three days or whatever the fuck it was.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_01: It was nonsense before we even get into the real nonsense of this.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so let's let's get into the real the real nonsense.
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_01: So the real nonsense of this is that I have no idea what the fuck happened, other than the fact of like, you know, and we're playing Avengers.
• 54:19
  SPEAKER_01: This is how I describe this to other people, right?
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_01: Is that we are playing Avengers, and so for some reason, the weight of the entire fucking world, the free world, is dependent on these eight people in this fucking room in this shitty hotel, right?
• 54:31
  SPEAKER_01: And so the the weight of the free world is dependent on you, and we all need to combine our spiritual gifts to stop they, the infamous they, from ruining all the things.
• 54:40
  SPEAKER_01: Now, this is neither here nor there.
• 54:41
  SPEAKER_01: I will tell you, I believe in all of this shit.
• 54:43
  SPEAKER_01: I know that there's some fucking sinister ass shit going on.
• 54:46
  SPEAKER_01: I know that children are being abducted for a very specific reason.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_01: I know these things.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_01: I have seen it, I know it, I feel it.
• 54:53
  SPEAKER_01: I've been exposed to a lot of these things.
• 54:55
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm not, I'm not discrediting that.
• 54:58
  SPEAKER_01: I think that these things are actually happening.
• 55:00
  SPEAKER_01: However, I don't think that it's the responsibility of eight random ass entrepreneurs in a room to cyclically defend children being stolen in the night.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think that.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_01: It sounds crazy when we say it out loud, right?
• 55:12
  SPEAKER_01: But in this hotel, she had created and curated the story about the people that are out to get you, which is kind of a running narrative when it comes to cult narrative as well.
• 55:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's like we have to position a bad guy, like the fastest way to friends is a common enemy.
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so, really starting to talk about child abduction, but also preying on something that was very close for me, right?
• 55:32
  SPEAKER_01: Was that she was very much talking about the concept of being head-hunted.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_01: And at the time, there were some really weird things happening in my life.
• 55:40
  SPEAKER_01: My life is just changing in general.
• 55:41
  SPEAKER_01: You make that money that fast, like different relationships start to show up, like different people want different things from you.
• 55:46
  SPEAKER_01: And there's weird things that you are hard to decipher.
• 55:49
  SPEAKER_01: And so I had already told her previous to being on this retreat that I had this woman, okay, who was incessantly messaging me, like just weird shit, just very like love bombing, and like, I want you to talk to my husband.
• 56:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel like there's a place for you, like in our world, and like just I'm just weird ass shit, right?
• 56:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I felt strange anyways in this conversation.
• 56:09
  SPEAKER_01: And so Betty had suggested that maybe this is a part of this cult thing.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so cult leaders definitely use other cults to create cult positioning, which is, you know, brilliant in itself.
• 56:19
  SPEAKER_01: But she was like, Yeah, do some digging on this.
• 56:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so I looked up this guy and like the husband of this person is she, he's like a Scientologist.
• 56:25
  SPEAKER_01: Everything just got real fishy real fast, right?
• 56:27
  SPEAKER_01: And so then she proceeded to tell me the story about women in the coaching world, specifically women, women in the coaching world who start making money turn heads of the infamous they.
• 56:37
  SPEAKER_01: And so the they starts headhunting these people because they are garnering influence.
• 56:42
  SPEAKER_01: The people who are moving quickly in influence circles get swooped up by this cult.
• 56:46
  SPEAKER_01: And basically they make you a deal.
• 56:48
  SPEAKER_01: They come to you, they present you a deal, and it's something that you can't refuse.
• 56:52
  SPEAKER_01: And they promise you like all of the stardom, the fame and the fortune and the money, and they they promise you all of these, you know, adrenochrome kind of things, right?
• 56:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so it's all gold juice kind of narrative, right?
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_01: So she tells me this thing, and like before this, I hadn't really heard of any of these things.
• 57:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like I, but then of course you start Googling and God help us all, right?
• 57:08
  SPEAKER_01: Down that route, we're interruptoids very, very quickly, right?
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_01: So everything just gets derailed.
• 57:13
  SPEAKER_01: I'm already feeling weird, right?
• 57:14
  SPEAKER_01: Having these kinds of conversations because I do feel it, and I do feel like that woman is she circles back about every six months and she comes and she tries to infiltrate in the very straight, you know, she tries to go through my mom, right?
• 57:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like she does weird shit.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_01: And so I'm already on high alert about this.
• 57:28
  SPEAKER_01: But then I watched another girl who was the same as me, okay, same trajectory, same timeline, and she made about the same amount of money with the same audience size as me.
• 57:37
  SPEAKER_01: And all of a sudden, this girl blew up.
• 57:40
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it was like 10X, like for no reason.
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_01: Her audience did not increase, nothing changed.
• 57:45
  SPEAKER_01: Like I've been watching this bitch like a hawk.
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_01: I'm good at funnel hacking, right?
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_01: And like I've been watching her like a hawk, nothing changed.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_01: But she bought from this coach, right?
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_01: She bought from this big hat manifesting girl, and then all of a sudden, everything fucking 10x.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_01: She started making 10 times the money.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_01: I found out later that none of that was actually true.
• 58:00
  SPEAKER_01: She just lied, convenient enough.
• 58:02
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I didn't know that.
• 58:03
  SPEAKER_01: But like at the time, like I was watching her 10x.
• 58:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so I had expressed this to Betty and was like talking about this.
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_01: And she had told me, she was like, Yeah, she took the deal.
• 58:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's what happens when you take the deal.
• 58:12
  SPEAKER_01: You 10X, you take the deal, and then this crazy world opens up.
• 58:16
  SPEAKER_01: But you don't ever want to do that because if you do that, then what happens is like you owe them for the rest of your life, and you're never gonna get out, right?
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_01: And so she positioned this big, scary narrative already in my head.
• 58:28
  SPEAKER_01: And then when we're sitting in this room, all of those things are swimming in my head as we're talking about all these strange idiosyncrasies things, beautiful mind, put push pins on the fucking board things about all the California narrative of what's happening behind the scenes in California and Hollywood and LA and all of this.
• 58:46
  SPEAKER_01: And you guys, I see things in the collective and I and I have, I've always had that.
• 58:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like I know things that are gonna happen.
• 58:52
  SPEAKER_01: I have a certain level of like call it psychic ability, call it the knowing.
• 58:55
  SPEAKER_01: Really, I know what it is.
• 58:56
  SPEAKER_01: It's pattern recognition.
• 58:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just very good at recognizing patterns, and so I see things as they're happening very quickly.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I kind of see it a little bit ahead of time because it's a relative like predictability.
• 59:05
  SPEAKER_01: But like when we went through whatever the fuck it is that we went through and all of those pieces, something inside of me, like there was a just a door that just kind of like opened where it was like, hey, you should look at this.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_01: And I walked through this door, and it was all this thing about child sacrifice and like all the things that go bump in the night when it comes to sexual trauma and all of that.
• 59:24
  SPEAKER_01: And it's just kind of things that I couldn't unsee.
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_01: And so that night I had a dream, right?
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I had a dream and I saw this compound, this place, right, where they were sacrificing these children and the infamous they, they're sacrificing these children using this electro device.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_01: So they put all these kids in a pool, the kids like teenage, like 12-ish, they put them all in a pool and they turn on this thing and it zaps them and they do the extraction of the chemical out of their brain while they're like in the pool.
• 59:50
  SPEAKER_01: This is my dream.
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_01: This is not something I've resources.
• 59:52
  SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm not telling you this is a fact.
• 59:54
  SPEAKER_01: This is my fucking dream.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_01: So I had the dream.
• 59:57
  SPEAKER_01: And then when we got up and we started looking at everything, and like I knew what to Google, right?
• 1:00:01
  SPEAKER_01: The knowing came in.
• 1:00:02
  SPEAKER_01: It was like, you need to look up this.
• 1:00:03
  SPEAKER_01: And so we looked up that exact address that we were talking about during this crazy ass fucking session.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_01: And I looked up the Google Maps, and I am not shitting you.
• 1:00:09
  SPEAKER_01: It was the same exact compound.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_01: It looked exactly the same on Google Maps as it did in my fucking dream.
• 1:00:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I freaked the I mean the goosebumps now, like I just freaked the fuck out.
• 1:00:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's weird to see those things, and like there was enough, there was enough plausible deniability in the things that are real to make it feel like this really was really important and that this really, really mattered, and that like we all needed to like stop everything in our lives to solve this fucking problem and save these fucking children.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_01: And then that same fucking day, there was in the news while we were there, there was a fucking school shooting not far from there.
• 1:00:40
  SPEAKER_01: I had that like specific hit where it was like, oh, this is what the school shootings are about, which is something that I'm pretty fucking spiked up on because I have kids that are in school.
• 1:00:48
  SPEAKER_01: It was this whole thing of, oh, the school shootings are the distraction for this and like this is how they're doing all this stuff, and like all this crazy knowing.
• 1:00:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I know I sound like a fucking psychopath, but that's exactly what happened while we were there.
• 1:00:58
  SPEAKER_01: It was just this weird spin-out of crazy pattern recognition things that quite honestly may be true, but are completely irrelevant to my fucking business.
• 1:01:07
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for sharing that.
• 1:01:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that we all had, we've talked about this on other podcasts as well, just that experience of feeling like we were involved in something very, very, very important on one level.
• 1:01:20
  SPEAKER_00: But to your point, it's like we didn't sign up for that.
• 1:01:23
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't show up and say, Oh, I want to play Star Wars for the night.
• 1:01:26
  SPEAKER_00: With all that Betty shared about what happens when somebody signs up and goes to the they people.
• 1:01:33
  SPEAKER_00: Do you think that she did that?
• 1:01:35
  SPEAKER_00: Because one of the things that she told me is that they have to tell you what they're doing.
• 1:01:39
  SPEAKER_00: And so all along my story, I see these places where she's telling me stuff.
• 1:01:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I recognize now she was telling me what she was doing.
• 1:01:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I would love to get your take on that.
• 1:01:48
  SPEAKER_01: So this is absolutely my husband's take on this is that he thinks that she is a recruiter.
• 1:01:54
  SPEAKER_01: I think so too.
• 1:01:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 1:01:55
  SPEAKER_01: She's a recruiter and she presents them as the villain, but really like she's trying to get you under her side thinking that she's the good guy when really this whole thing is just it's a very conveniently arced story.
• 1:02:06
  SPEAKER_00: I think so too.
• 1:02:07
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, so we'll go back to that, but let's just finish the thought of where you left off, which was you had this whole crazy experience, but then you're also like, okay, how is this helping me in my business?
• 1:02:19
  SPEAKER_02: And also, I think I don't think you said this right now, but I know we've talked about this, is just like you had this awareness.
• 1:02:25
  SPEAKER_02: I realize that this is true, but also like I'm choosing not to put my energy into this because I know it's not serving me.
• 1:02:34
  SPEAKER_02: Let's kind of like finish out that and then like the rest of the retreat.
• 1:02:39
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think that these things are not happening.
• 1:02:41
  SPEAKER_01: I I do think these things are happening.
• 1:02:43
  SPEAKER_01: I do think that there are things that go bump in the night.
• 1:02:45
  SPEAKER_01: I do think that children are being stolen.
• 1:02:46
  SPEAKER_01: I think that this is happening.
• 1:02:47
  SPEAKER_01: I think that there is a very sinister force at work that is doing terrible things.
• 1:02:52
  SPEAKER_01: And I do genuinely believe that.
• 1:02:54
  SPEAKER_01: I don't pretend to understand it.
• 1:02:55
  SPEAKER_01: I do not put my tinfoil hat on and play these fucking games on the internet.
• 1:02:58
  SPEAKER_01: I do not do this shit.
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_01: But the core knowing of my being, I can feel those things.
• 1:03:04
  SPEAKER_01: However, there's a lot of other things that happen in this world, you know, children starving and domestic violence and pedophilia.
• 1:03:10
  SPEAKER_01: There's a lot of other very, very terrible things that are happening in this world.
• 1:03:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I am not an Avenger.
• 1:03:15
  SPEAKER_01: I'm here to help in the capacity that I can help in in my world.
• 1:03:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that that's something that's really important when it comes to self-sovereignty is knowing your fucking lane, right?
• 1:03:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm not going to be able to do all these things and change all of these pieces.
• 1:03:28
  SPEAKER_01: I know the lane in which I can help and change people's lives.
• 1:03:30
  SPEAKER_01: I know that I can help people to get out of sabotage patterns and into sovereignty and help them to make money because I know that money in the hands of good people does good things.
• 1:03:38
  SPEAKER_01: And that is my role.
• 1:03:39
  SPEAKER_01: That is what I am here to do.
• 1:03:40
  SPEAKER_01: And like any coach that I'm working with needs to support me in my vision, not steal my energy and my gifts and reposition them for their whatever the fuck you want to call it, right?
• 1:03:52
  SPEAKER_01: For their agenda.
• 1:03:54
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not a part of your fucking agenda.
• 1:03:56
  SPEAKER_01: You're my coach.
• 1:03:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm paying you.
• 1:03:58
  SPEAKER_01: If you want to borrow my fucking psychic gifts, here's your fucking invoice.
• 1:04:01
  SPEAKER_01: I'll send it to you and I'll help you with any of these things that you need help peeling back.
• 1:04:04
  SPEAKER_01: Like you can borrow my fucking brain and my access to the collective fucking knowledge.
• 1:04:08
  SPEAKER_01: Sure, that comes with a fucking price tag, just like fucking everybody else.
• 1:04:11
  SPEAKER_01: I'm here to run a fucking business.
• 1:04:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm here to help these people.
• 1:04:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not here to be your fucking pawn, which is exactly what happened while we were there.
• 1:04:19
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:04:20
  SPEAKER_02: In the vein of like you creating your own ROI, what was your ROI from that retreat?
• 1:04:25
  SPEAKER_01: I just didn't know the crazy was crazy.
• 1:04:27
  SPEAKER_01: I had no idea.
• 1:04:28
  SPEAKER_01: Like I just, I just hadn't opened this fucking door.
• 1:04:31
  SPEAKER_01: But I did, I got to meet all you guys and I created that connection piece and got to see what was really actually happening.
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_01: And then I also learned the truth about where your business are at because we did talk about that revenue piece.
• 1:04:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so that helped me to un-gaslight myself because I was like, oh, it's not me that's a fucking like an idiot.
• 1:04:47
  SPEAKER_01: She just lied to me.
• 1:04:48
  SPEAKER_01: I started to understand things differently and it helped me to peel back the that layer, but also it was a little bit of the perspective of her in person.
• 1:04:55
  SPEAKER_01: You can't hide things the same way.
• 1:04:56
  SPEAKER_01: So it's like I could touch her, I could feel her energy.
• 1:04:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like from that standpoint, I got a lot more clarity on what she actually is, right?
• 1:05:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think that had I not gone, I mean, it would have been easier to hide that shit from me for longer.
• 1:05:10
  SPEAKER_01: So it's like I was able to create the awareness so much fucking sooner.
• 1:05:14
  SPEAKER_01: Also, to know that like my retreats are fucking phenomenal.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_01: So there's that, right?
• 1:05:18
  SPEAKER_01: My in-person experiences are fucking incredible compared to that dog shit.
• 1:05:22
  SPEAKER_01: Also, I guess to meet other people that were in this vein.
• 1:05:25
  SPEAKER_01: One of those people became a client of mine.
• 1:05:27
  SPEAKER_01: I create my own ROI.
• 1:05:28
  SPEAKER_01: I did get that 10K back in the form of that person coming and joining my program and creating results on the other side of my program.
• 1:05:34
  SPEAKER_01: So there's that.
• 1:05:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:05:36
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 1:05:37
  SPEAKER_02: So then you leave the retreat.
• 1:05:39
  SPEAKER_02: What is your mindset?
• 1:05:40
  SPEAKER_02: Are you like, fuck this bitch?
• 1:05:41
  SPEAKER_02: I'm out, but you didn't quit working with her after this.
• 1:05:44
  SPEAKER_02: So what was your thinking coming out of the retreat?
• 1:05:47
  SPEAKER_02: Were you like, okay, I'm just gonna continue until my package is over?
• 1:05:50
  SPEAKER_02: Like, what were you thinking?
• 1:05:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so you remember that we did the sound bass thing.
• 1:05:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 1:05:55
  SPEAKER_01: And then we put those tattoos on, and then they put the patches on.
• 1:05:59
  SPEAKER_01: The patches.
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_01: That we don't know where we're in the fucking patches.
• 1:06:02
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:06:04
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:06:04
  SPEAKER_01: I had the patch on when I got home.
• 1:06:06
  SPEAKER_01: I flew home with the patch on.
• 1:06:08
  SPEAKER_01: And so at this point, like I my head was spinning from that fucking dream.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_01: Everything was crazy.
• 1:06:13
  SPEAKER_01: And like my eyes were being opened to all of this crap.
• 1:06:15
  SPEAKER_01: And so I felt more lost than I'd ever felt.
• 1:06:18
  SPEAKER_01: I felt crazy.
• 1:06:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like I felt like in the crazy.
• 1:06:20
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't feel rational like I feel now, looking back on this, like this was bullshit.
• 1:06:24
  SPEAKER_01: I felt like, oh my God, I'm responsible for avenging the world.
• 1:06:27
  SPEAKER_01: That's how I felt at the retreat.
• 1:06:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like this reflection that we're sharing is years later where I can actually like ascertain it.
• 1:06:33
  SPEAKER_01: But like in that moment, no, no, no, I was in the cult, right?
• 1:06:36
  SPEAKER_01: I felt a moment of the belonging.
• 1:06:38
  SPEAKER_01: I felt the feeling of this is really important.
• 1:06:41
  SPEAKER_01: And it wasn't until I returned to quote unquote reality.
• 1:06:44
  SPEAKER_01: And it wasn't until I got home and my husband was like in my face.
• 1:06:48
  SPEAKER_01: What is wrong with you?
• 1:06:49
  SPEAKER_01: I must have been acting so strangely.
• 1:06:51
  SPEAKER_01: He was just not having it.
• 1:06:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then he saw the patch on my neck and he was like, What the fuck is this?
• 1:06:55
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I don't know.
• 1:06:56
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't even remember the patch was there because it's on the back of my fucking neck.
• 1:06:58
  SPEAKER_01: He took it off of me and he was like, What have you been doing for the last couple of days?
• 1:07:01
  SPEAKER_01: You haven't talked to me, you haven't messaged me, which is not like us, right?
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_01: You tell me what happened the fuck now.
• 1:07:06
  SPEAKER_01: I told him all the things and I was very like spinning and he was just like backing away slowly, right?
• 1:07:11
  SPEAKER_01: He was like, This is this is not a thing.
• 1:07:13
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, my husband was really the tether to that space.
• 1:07:17
  SPEAKER_01: I remember having conversations with my support coach and talking to her and telling her all the things.
• 1:07:21
  SPEAKER_01: And like, you know, I mean, it's easy to get down that fucking rabbit hole and stay down there.
• 1:07:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's a very deep, dark place.
• 1:07:27
  SPEAKER_01: And so I definitely didn't pull out.
• 1:07:28
  SPEAKER_01: This wasn't like the moment where I was like, fuck this bitch, like at all.
• 1:07:32
  SPEAKER_01: I was in it worse after that retreat.
• 1:07:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I got on calls with her sooner after that retreat.
• 1:07:37
  SPEAKER_01: I was more invested because of that experience.
• 1:07:40
  SPEAKER_02: This goes along with the pattern because this is what we see with a lot of people is like she creates that like trauma bond.
• 1:07:48
  SPEAKER_02: And then you feel like you need to continue to have that connection because it's like no one understands you in that way.
• 1:07:57
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what she creates through those experiences.
• 1:08:00
  SPEAKER_02: So then you started talking to her more, and what started to happen.
• 1:08:04
  SPEAKER_01: So from there, it was kind of like blackout y.
• 1:08:06
  SPEAKER_01: I know what was happening in my business because I can like tether to like those events, right?
• 1:08:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like I know that right after that, I took my clients on a retreat in Mexico.
• 1:08:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was in Mexico.
• 1:08:16
  SPEAKER_01: And when I was in Mexico, I was completely unplugged from everything and everyone, right?
• 1:08:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like we got this retreat center, we did the things like that you're supposed to do at a retreat, we fed everybody, right?
• 1:08:24
  SPEAKER_01: And so I got back into my normal environment.
• 1:08:26
  SPEAKER_01: And getting back into my normal environment, it probably took me about a month or two where like everything was vague.
• 1:08:32
  SPEAKER_01: That retreat in Mexico was really powerful.
• 1:08:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like one of my clients, she closed a six-figure client while we were there.
• 1:08:37
  SPEAKER_01: We were like doing the work you're supposed to do at a retreat, right?
• 1:08:40
  SPEAKER_01: And so that kind of snapped me back into reality in a weird way because I got some isolation.
• 1:08:44
  SPEAKER_01: I got some like away from her kind of time because, of course, I was not like being coached at that moment while we were in Mexico.
• 1:08:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I was in Mexico for three weeks.
• 1:08:53
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like that gap, I think is what gave me like the clarity in coming back.
• 1:08:58
  SPEAKER_01: And so then at that point, I had another quarterly payment due.
• 1:09:02
  SPEAKER_01: And so I felt the hit of that again, right?
• 1:09:04
  SPEAKER_01: Felt the hit of the money, and it wasn't as much this time because I didn't have a big giant month and that I didn't have a launch.
• 1:09:09
  SPEAKER_01: But what I did start to notice, I was like, oh, I'm intentionally not making money.
• 1:09:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I knew it, right?
• 1:09:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was like it was very, I was very aware at six months.
• 1:09:16
  SPEAKER_01: I knew I was like, oh, I'm intentionally not making money because I don't want to pay her, right?
• 1:09:22
  SPEAKER_01: The red share was like cut my rate, and I'm not gonna be the person that lies or doesn't pay.
• 1:09:26
  SPEAKER_01: And also to your question of like, why do you say?
• 1:09:28
  SPEAKER_01: Because I have a contract and I don't ever do that.
• 1:09:30
  SPEAKER_01: I might not engage with you as a as a coach, but I am never leaving a contract.
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_01: I do not do that.
• 1:09:35
  SPEAKER_01: I made this investment, I made this commitment, I do not leave commitments.
• 1:09:38
  SPEAKER_01: I don't, I don't care what the coach does or does not do.
• 1:09:41
  SPEAKER_01: If I entered a nine-month agreement, I'm gonna pay for that nine-month agreement.
• 1:09:44
  SPEAKER_01: I can't be who the fuck I am and lead people the way I lead people if I default on pick fucking coaching programs.
• 1:09:50
  SPEAKER_01: I do not default on coaching programs.
• 1:09:51
  SPEAKER_01: I don't care what the fuck happened.
• 1:09:53
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:09:54
  SPEAKER_02: You felt like you were not, you were stopping yourself from making money.
• 1:09:57
  SPEAKER_02: And then were you still leaning into her support or how are you engaging with her?
• 1:10:03
  SPEAKER_01: No, this is when I started to get pretty contentious.
• 1:10:05
  SPEAKER_01: I can be pretty fucking testy.
• 1:10:07
  SPEAKER_01: I'm pretty pushback y, right?
• 1:10:09
  SPEAKER_01: And my first path of this is avoidance, right?
• 1:10:12
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm not scared of somebody hurting me.
• 1:10:14
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:10:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm scared of me hurting you.
• 1:10:16
  SPEAKER_01: And so I will back away slowly and stay out of things.
• 1:10:19
  SPEAKER_01: And so that's what I started to do, right?
• 1:10:20
  SPEAKER_01: I started to withdraw, post when I got back from Mexico.
• 1:10:23
  SPEAKER_01: I just didn't book calls with her, right?
• 1:10:25
  SPEAKER_01: Which led to a chasing behavior.
• 1:10:26
  SPEAKER_01: So she started to reach out to me consistently, right?
• 1:10:29
  SPEAKER_01: And be like, you need to book a call.
• 1:10:30
  SPEAKER_01: We haven't talked.
• 1:10:31
  SPEAKER_01: You need to book a call.
• 1:10:32
  SPEAKER_01: We need to talk about this, we need to talk about that.
• 1:10:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:10:34
  SPEAKER_01: And just get under the runaround and not really booking those calls.
• 1:10:37
  SPEAKER_01: But this is when she went and launched the next next retreat you guys went to that I didn't go to.
• 1:10:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:10:44
  SPEAKER_01: And that was when you were done.
• 1:10:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 1:10:47
  SPEAKER_01: So tell us about that.
• 1:10:48
  SPEAKER_01: So she privately invited me and did this whole thing, and it was all about forced medicine and the calling into this and all of this.
• 1:10:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I was kind of a fucking bitch, right?
• 1:10:56
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, yeah, like that's over my birthday week.
• 1:10:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not going.
• 1:10:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not going to this.
• 1:11:00
  SPEAKER_01: Like, is my husband has plans for me for my birthday.
• 1:11:02
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it was a really easy excuse, right?
• 1:11:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so I just told her no.
• 1:11:07
  SPEAKER_01: And that didn't go very well.
• 1:11:09
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, I think you're hiding, I think you're avoiding.
• 1:11:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think that you don't want to open this door when opportunity is knocking and this is really gonna hurt your business and all this kind of stuff, right?
• 1:11:17
  SPEAKER_01: And like, pain point poked me to death.
• 1:11:19
  SPEAKER_01: Bitch, I'm a bartender.
• 1:11:20
  SPEAKER_01: There's nothing you can fucking say to me that's gonna get through this fucking skin when I'm at that level, right?
• 1:11:24
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, no, go fuck yourself.
• 1:11:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so then he talked to all of you guys, and I talked to several of you guys, and you guys were like, we're not going, right?
• 1:11:31
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone that went to the first retreat, we're not going, right?
• 1:11:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, okay, cool, no one's going.
• 1:11:36
  SPEAKER_01: I don't need to feel a feeling about this.
• 1:11:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I just walked away and then I got on a plane because I remember when I was talking to you, I was in an airport, so I don't know where the fuck I went, but I went, I got on another plane and did whatever the hell I was doing.
• 1:11:45
  SPEAKER_01: And then in our private Facebook group, I see a message go up from her.
• 1:11:50
  SPEAKER_01: And it's this big long fucking pitch post that called us, I think the words were spoiled little kittens or something like that.
• 1:11:57
  SPEAKER_01: There was definitely the word kittens in it, right?
• 1:11:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like helpless little spoiled kittens or some shit like that.
• 1:12:01
  SPEAKER_01: I thought I was working with women who make moves and make money.
• 1:12:04
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't realize I was working with like spoiled little kittens so that they can't make decisions.
• 1:12:08
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, what the fuck is this?
• 1:12:10
  SPEAKER_01: I screenshotted it and sent it to my fucking support coach, and she was like, oh my God.
• 1:12:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was like the epitome of like pain point poking and manipulation and just labeling and all the things with that like when a narcissist doesn't get their way, like when my ex-boyfriend like didn't get his fucking way, that's exactly what he would do, right?
• 1:12:27
  SPEAKER_01: He would like take this and spin it and make me like the worst, they vilify me, make me the worst person and start the triangulation and all this fucking crap.
• 1:12:34
  SPEAKER_01: I've seen that pattern a million fucking times before, and I was like, oh no, fuck this bitch.
• 1:12:38
  SPEAKER_01: This is when I started to get really fucking angry.
• 1:12:40
  SPEAKER_01: But then I was angry by myself because you guys all changed your mind.
• 1:12:43
  SPEAKER_01: That post went out and she messaged all of you guys and you guys all fucking went.
• 1:12:47
  SPEAKER_01: And so then I felt that feeling too of which is intentional on her behalf, right?
• 1:12:51
  SPEAKER_01: Of I immediately got kicked out of the herd.
• 1:12:53
  SPEAKER_01: That was the end of it, right?
• 1:12:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I didn't go to this fucking thing.
• 1:12:56
  SPEAKER_01: I wasn't in the inner circle, I wasn't part of this thing.
• 1:12:59
  SPEAKER_01: And she said those things to me.
• 1:13:01
  SPEAKER_01: You didn't go, you didn't go to this thing, so you're totally on the outside and like you're saying no to this.
• 1:13:05
  SPEAKER_01: I don't really know what what to do and what to help you with, right?
• 1:13:08
  SPEAKER_01: And that was the thing.
• 1:13:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, cool, I don't care.
• 1:13:10
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I was getting really contentious.
• 1:13:12
  SPEAKER_01: So then she's like, Well, we have two more calls left, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:13:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, okay, whatever.
• 1:13:15
  SPEAKER_01: So I get onto the second to last call.
• 1:13:18
  SPEAKER_01: And this was the weirdest shit ever.
• 1:13:20
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:13:20
  SPEAKER_01: She she pulls me onto this call.
• 1:13:21
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and this call is supposed to be about making money in my business because that's what I'm being coached on.
• 1:13:26
  SPEAKER_01: And she shares her screen in with me.
• 1:13:29
  SPEAKER_01: I still don't know what the fuck this was.
• 1:13:30
  SPEAKER_01: I wish I fucking recorded that shit, but she shared her screen in with me and she was like showing me her like bank stuff as if you're like, this is your Wells of Fargo account, but she's in a different country, so I don't freaking understand what the fuck's going on.
• 1:13:42
  SPEAKER_01: She's showing me all of these bank things and like what looks to me to be like day trading.
• 1:13:47
  SPEAKER_01: Now, at least I don't know anything about fucking the stock market.
• 1:13:50
  SPEAKER_01: Nothing.
• 1:13:50
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:13:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not stock market literate.
• 1:13:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like I invest in real estate, I only know real estate, I don't know anything else.
• 1:13:55
  SPEAKER_01: And so she's like showing me this thing, and she's like, you just do this and you follow this trade line and you do this thing and you make money.
• 1:14:00
  SPEAKER_01: And she likes showing, she's like, I have a guy for this, and I like move money and I made$30,000 today just from this one trade and like all this stuff.
• 1:14:07
  SPEAKER_01: And she's like, I could show you and you can do it too.
• 1:14:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm just sitting there on this call for an hour watching her like play with her bank accounts, like in front of me.
• 1:14:14
  SPEAKER_01: And it was like, she was like, Are you following this?
• 1:14:16
  SPEAKER_01: Do you understand this?
• 1:14:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm looking at her, I'm like, I don't even know what the fuck we're talking about.
• 1:14:19
  SPEAKER_01: It was so fucking weird.
• 1:14:21
  SPEAKER_02: And also you didn't ask her to do right.
• 1:14:24
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 1:14:25
  SPEAKER_02: Did you even have a uh chance to ask like a question or this is what I want to focus on?
• 1:14:30
  SPEAKER_01: No, I need to show you this, and you need to learn this for your business.
• 1:14:33
  SPEAKER_01: You have to know this if you want to be successful.
• 1:14:35
  SPEAKER_01: And it was like, I don't know anything about that shit, but like I definitely know that moving money and playing those games, like, there's there's fishiness in all of that, right?
• 1:14:42
  SPEAKER_01: There's fishiness in all of that.
• 1:14:44
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds like insider fucking information to me that probably gets you fucking locked up.
• 1:14:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so I don't know.
• 1:14:49
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I still to this day have no idea what the fuck she was actually doing or what she was actually talking about, or if any of it was real.
• 1:14:54
  SPEAKER_01: How do you know that any of that is real or if this is just her like flashing big numbers on a screen?
• 1:14:59
  SPEAKER_01: Because that's kind of what it felt like.
• 1:15:00
  SPEAKER_01: It felt like brandishing, right?
• 1:15:01
  SPEAKER_01: It was like, this is my bank account.
• 1:15:03
  SPEAKER_01: And at least the numbers were big, but they weren't that big.
• 1:15:06
  SPEAKER_01: I've seen bank accounts with fucking a million dollars in them before.
• 1:15:08
  SPEAKER_01: I have one, right?
• 1:15:09
  SPEAKER_01: What are we talking about?
• 1:15:10
  SPEAKER_01: It felt like this, like she was trying to position her authority over me.
• 1:15:14
  SPEAKER_01: I have more money than you, which there was more money on that screen than I had at the time.
• 1:15:17
  SPEAKER_01: But I mean, not enough for me to feel a feeling about it.
• 1:15:20
  SPEAKER_01: I'll tell you that much, right?
• 1:15:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like you've been doing this for 20 years.
• 1:15:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in my third year.
• 1:15:24
  SPEAKER_01: What are we talking about?
• 1:15:25
  SPEAKER_01: When I'm as old as you, I'm gonna have way more money than that, you know.
• 1:15:28
  SPEAKER_02: Do you think that that was also like her way of trying to like keep you in or teach you or show you that there's something she could teach you so that you would want to keep working with her?
• 1:15:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I definitely felt like that.
• 1:15:42
  SPEAKER_01: I think she thought I was gonna be like, oh my God.
• 1:15:45
  SPEAKER_01: It was a tactic, right?
• 1:15:46
  SPEAKER_01: It was like, oh, she doesn't care about this, maybe she cares about that.
• 1:15:49
  SPEAKER_01: And that's what like people in narcissistic patterns do is they're trying to find the carrot, right?
• 1:15:52
  SPEAKER_01: They're trying to find your currency of the thing that you're like sucked in by.
• 1:15:56
  SPEAKER_01: And quite honestly, she just chose the wrong thing.
• 1:15:59
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe if it had been real estate, I would have felt differently.
• 1:16:01
  SPEAKER_01: But stock market, I'm like, what are we talking about?
• 1:16:04
  SPEAKER_01: I don't even know what you're talking about.
• 1:16:06
  unknown: Right.
• 1:16:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and you don't have like an interest in learning either.
• 1:16:10
  SPEAKER_02: It would be one thing if you like really wanted to learn that or something, but and then did you just like get off the call and that was it?
• 1:16:16
  SPEAKER_02: That was it.
• 1:16:17
  SPEAKER_01: I just got off a call and I told my husband, I was like, this is the weirdest fucking thing I've ever done.
• 1:16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Then there was like another call.
• 1:16:22
  SPEAKER_01: At this point, like it's a little bit of morbid curiosity, right?
• 1:16:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's a little bit of like, what's gonna happen next?
• 1:16:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not gonna not take the call because you pay for the experience, you get the experience.
• 1:16:32
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not scared anymore, right?
• 1:16:33
  SPEAKER_01: Like after I didn't go to the second one, we're leaving out a big, giant gap here, right?
• 1:16:37
  SPEAKER_01: Because when you guys got back from that fucking retreat, I got a voxer message from a bumblebee.
• 1:16:43
  SPEAKER_01: So let's talk about that.
• 1:16:46
  SPEAKER_02: And this was before your last call.
• 1:16:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:16:48
  SPEAKER_02: So then let's talk about that and then we'll go to the last call.
• 1:16:53
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so you guys get back from a retreat, and I haven't talked to any of you guys, but she messages me and sends me a voxer.
• 1:17:01
  SPEAKER_01: Liz always tries to make me do the voice.
• 1:17:04
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, Queen Nicole.
• 1:17:07
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, what the fuck is this?
• 1:17:10
  SPEAKER_01: It was like literally like talking like a buzzing bee, and like she was announcing herself as this new character, this new version of herself, because apparently, whatever the fuck happened when you guys were on that retreat, she embodied this new person.
• 1:17:22
  SPEAKER_01: And so she was introducing herself to me.
• 1:17:24
  SPEAKER_01: She was like literally introducing herself as this new person that was going to coach and lead me through this process, right?
• 1:17:31
  SPEAKER_01: And so this boxer conversation.
• 1:17:33
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, can you back what the fuck do I even say to something like this?
• 1:17:35
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 1:17:36
  SPEAKER_01: So she goes on this whole like rant about the hive and honey and like how she's gonna help bring all the bees together.
• 1:17:42
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, what the fuck?
• 1:17:44
  SPEAKER_01: I made Liz come over to my house.
• 1:17:45
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, you need to listen to this fucking message.
• 1:17:48
  SPEAKER_01: What is going on?
• 1:17:49
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 1:17:49
  SPEAKER_01: And it was just absolutely fucking bananas.
• 1:17:51
  SPEAKER_01: And then she got onto social media and did all this weird ass shit and re-announced herself with this new name and like this new persona and this new mission.
• 1:17:59
  SPEAKER_01: And like, it was just fucking wild.
• 1:18:02
  SPEAKER_01: I just it came back to one of my coaches, like one of my bro marketing coaches, telling me that you can't break your business.
• 1:18:07
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, maybe you can.
• 1:18:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh, this is not doing it for me.
• 1:18:12
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't know what the fuck happened with you guys.
• 1:18:14
  SPEAKER_01: But from my point of view on that, I was like, she's a brain tumor.
• 1:18:17
  SPEAKER_01: That was what Liz and I decided.
• 1:18:19
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, this bitch has a brain tumor.
• 1:18:21
  SPEAKER_01: There's nothing else that fucking justifies this kind of fucking game.
• 1:18:24
  SPEAKER_02: Well, then I told her, then when you said she had a brain tumor, that I it reminded me of this one storyline in general hospital where the guy the guy starts, like this one guy who's like normal, he starts to have this like alter personality where he becomes like a murderer or something.
• 1:18:41
  SPEAKER_02: And then and then they figure out that it's all because he has a brain tumor.
• 1:18:45
  SPEAKER_02: And then once they remove the brain tumor, they're like, Well, should he still be held accountable essentially for what he did when he had the brain tumor?
• 1:18:53
  SPEAKER_02: And that was like all I could think of when you said that.
• 1:18:56
  SPEAKER_02: So, anyway, so then at that point, you're definitely like, Okay, I'm done.
• 1:19:02
  SPEAKER_02: I'm dead.
• 1:19:03
  SPEAKER_02: But then you still had one more call.
• 1:19:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so I still have one more call, and you gotta see the bumblebee in action, right?
• 1:19:08
  SPEAKER_01: Who's gonna pass that shit up?
• 1:19:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like at this point, it's I'm gonna get my popcorn and go to this fucking call.
• 1:19:13
  SPEAKER_01: So I get on this call, and she is the bumblebee.
• 1:19:17
  SPEAKER_01: She's in a different place in her house for the Zoom.
• 1:19:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's a different like backdrop in all of these things, and with the voice, and I just can't even imagine like my face.
• 1:19:26
  SPEAKER_01: I just I'm like not good at hiding the things, right?
• 1:19:29
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so it's like she comes on and she's like, This might be like really just confusing to you, and this being has a message from you, and she's talking in third person the whole fucking time, which is so fucking weird, right?
• 1:19:40
  SPEAKER_01: So talking in third person and as if the voice isn't enough, and then telling me that she has this message and that what I really need to focus on in my business to be able to get where I want to go is like closing whale clients.
• 1:19:52
  SPEAKER_01: And she goes on this big long thing about whales.
• 1:19:55
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just like, at least I don't even know what to fuck to do.
• 1:19:57
  SPEAKER_01: But then it turns.
• 1:19:59
  SPEAKER_01: There's like a turning point because like nothing she's doing is working.
• 1:20:02
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just like sitting there staring at her, like blank face, right?
• 1:20:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you are a fucking psycho.
• 1:20:07
  SPEAKER_01: And so she goes, she's like, I need to show you something, right?
• 1:20:11
  SPEAKER_01: The voice is killing me.
• 1:20:13
  SPEAKER_01: And so she pulls up her screen and shares in her screen and opens up my Facebook page.
• 1:20:18
  SPEAKER_01: Now I'm getting a feeling, right?
• 1:20:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm starting to get mad.
• 1:20:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so she goes into my Facebook page and she proceeds to open up like my photos section.
• 1:20:27
  SPEAKER_02: Did she say what she was doing before she did this?
• 1:20:30
  SPEAKER_02: Or that I have to show you something.
• 1:20:32
  SPEAKER_01: There's Bumblebee context.
• 1:20:34
  SPEAKER_01: I got nothing.
• 1:20:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I had just gotten back at this point.
• 1:20:36
  SPEAKER_01: I'd gotten back from that trip that I took with my husband for my birthday, right?
• 1:20:39
  SPEAKER_01: So she pulled up all the pictures that I had posted from my birthday.
• 1:20:44
  SPEAKER_01: And Daniel took me to Moonstone Beach in Oregon.
• 1:20:48
  SPEAKER_01: So we took like a big long road trip somewhere on the north northeast coast, right?
• 1:20:51
  SPEAKER_01: So we went up there and we stayed in this cute Airbnb and this glass, this beach has all the sea glass on it, so fucking cool, right?
• 1:20:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and so we spent all that time there together.
• 1:20:59
  SPEAKER_01: And I was finishing writing my novel, doing this last round of edits, and it was cool.
• 1:21:03
  SPEAKER_01: It was like a writer's retreat for my birthday, right?
• 1:21:05
  SPEAKER_01: I posted pictures from it as you fucking do.
• 1:21:07
  SPEAKER_01: And then she opened all these pictures and she begins to basically like pick Daniel apart, right?
• 1:21:12
  SPEAKER_01: And she's like telling me he's completely checked out, like he doesn't care about you.
• 1:21:16
  SPEAKER_01: You can tell, like looking at this like expression in his face, he's thinking about other people.
• 1:21:20
  SPEAKER_01: He's not present, like this energy just wants me to tell you this.
• 1:21:24
  SPEAKER_01: I'm the messenger, don't shoot the messenger kind of things.
• 1:21:26
  SPEAKER_01: I got this like divine download, right?
• 1:21:27
  SPEAKER_01: I got this download that told you that you need to beware and that there's like something beware, something that is like sinister about him and that he's gonna leave you and all this stuff.
• 1:21:38
  SPEAKER_01: And it was just fucking nuts.
• 1:21:40
  SPEAKER_01: And just pulling it in and just really preying on that insecurity that I naturally have, like in relationship.
• 1:21:46
  SPEAKER_01: Like my son's father died, right?
• 1:21:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like my son's father died, and the abandonment thing was already there from daddy issues, and then this just got reinforced.
• 1:21:53
  SPEAKER_01: My best friend died, who's a who's a guy, right?
• 1:21:55
  SPEAKER_01: And like I already have that natural fear of abandonment, and she knows that, right?
• 1:21:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so she's pulling on all of those strings and telling me about this sinister thing that's happening inside of my relationship that I'm just blinded and I just can't see, and it's gonna take me by surprise.
• 1:22:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm just planning all of this fucked off shit in my fucking head.
• 1:22:13
  SPEAKER_02: Did you like respond at all?
• 1:22:15
  SPEAKER_01: Did you like I said like nothing?
• 1:22:17
  SPEAKER_01: You didn't say anything, like I just shut down, right?
• 1:22:19
  SPEAKER_01: It was like I just closed the door, right?
• 1:22:20
  SPEAKER_01: Kind of feeling where I was just like, okay, okay, okay, and get like snotty, right?
• 1:22:25
  SPEAKER_01: And like just got off the call with her.
• 1:22:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm gonna just sit here and fucking rationalize with a fucking bumblebee.
• 1:22:29
  SPEAKER_01: What are we talking about?
• 1:22:30
  SPEAKER_02: This is a very distinct pattern that we've recognized with so many people is like the creating a wedge between you and the person closest to you.
• 1:22:41
  SPEAKER_02: And also the other thing that I think is like really unethical about this is you did not ask.
• 1:22:48
  SPEAKER_02: You didn't say, Hey, I'm feeling insecure about my relationship.
• 1:22:53
  SPEAKER_02: Can you help me?
• 1:22:54
  SPEAKER_02: Or I think my husband's lost interest.
• 1:22:57
  SPEAKER_02: Can you help me?
• 1:22:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you did not have any of those thoughts or feelings.
• 1:23:00
  SPEAKER_02: You did not ask for that information, yet it was just like dumped on you, and now you're left with the bag.
• 1:23:10
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'm sorry, regardless of like how crazy you think it is or how ridiculous it sounds, there's a part of it that is always going to like seep into your mind, no matter how much you know that it's not true, is something that is going to get into your head in some way.
• 1:23:28
  SPEAKER_02: And that obviously that's the point.
• 1:23:31
  SPEAKER_02: That I think is the worst part.
• 1:23:33
  SPEAKER_02: You didn't ask for that, and you're now just left with this information.
• 1:23:39
  SPEAKER_02: And it's like, what do you do with that?
• 1:23:41
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I mean, it was just that insidiousness.
• 1:23:43
  SPEAKER_01: It's ultimate pain point poking.
• 1:23:45
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, she knows it's the last fucking call.
• 1:23:47
  SPEAKER_01: She knows that this is when I would re-up and reactivate with her.
• 1:23:50
  SPEAKER_01: She's planting a seed of doubt that is you're gonna need help with this in the future, kind of thing, right?
• 1:23:55
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm gonna be the only person that knows how to help you because I'm the only person that sees it.
• 1:23:58
  SPEAKER_01: That kind of shit.
• 1:23:59
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, like it hit me right in the fucking heart where it was just like, oh, I felt that feeling, and there were definitely tears in my eyes and like thinking about losing this person or that he was doing something nefarious.
• 1:24:10
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, it makes you look twice.
• 1:24:12
  SPEAKER_01: And even though she's crazy, like, especially because she's crazy, it's like maybe people with brain tumors can see things we can't see, right?
• 1:24:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't fucking know.
• 1:24:18
  SPEAKER_01: There was that doubt.
• 1:24:19
  SPEAKER_01: I just had to shut it down.
• 1:24:20
  SPEAKER_01: Quite honestly, like at least she just attacked the wrong people.
• 1:24:23
  SPEAKER_01: If she would have chosen different targets, that might have worked.
• 1:24:26
  SPEAKER_01: There was a time in the beginning where she told me to fire my whole team.
• 1:24:29
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck yourself.
• 1:24:30
  SPEAKER_01: You've known me for four minutes.
• 1:24:31
  SPEAKER_01: Fucking tell me to fire my whole team.
• 1:24:32
  SPEAKER_01: You don't even know what I'm going through.
• 1:24:34
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna fire my support system.
• 1:24:36
  SPEAKER_01: She attacked the wrong people.
• 1:24:37
  SPEAKER_01: I've already been through this with another narcissistic abuse relationship.
• 1:24:41
  SPEAKER_01: I'm impenetrable to that because it's such an obvious red fucking flag for me.
• 1:24:45
  SPEAKER_01: I just know what she was doing.
• 1:24:46
  SPEAKER_01: And even though it hurt, it was like, why am I gonna take the word of a fucking bubble bee?
• 1:24:50
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and I got off that fucking call and then she tried to close me into the next fucking thing in Voxer, and I just shut that fucking shit down.
• 1:24:57
  SPEAKER_01: And then she demanded, you're gonna leave on terms like this.
• 1:25:00
  SPEAKER_01: Like you're just gonna leave, like after all I've done for you, kind of energy.
• 1:25:03
  SPEAKER_01: And like the Bumblebee voice wasn't there for that conversation.
• 1:25:05
  SPEAKER_01: And then she like came in and she was like, You need to go into that Facebook group and you need to explain yourself.
• 1:25:09
  SPEAKER_01: You need to tell everybody why you're leaving, you need to tell everybody what is making you abandon all of the rest of the members of this mastermind that you committed to, which by the way, I finished my nine-month contract.
• 1:25:18
  SPEAKER_01: So, how is that abandoning?
• 1:25:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you don't owe nothing to anyone.
• 1:25:22
  SPEAKER_01: I owe nobody anything.
• 1:25:23
  SPEAKER_01: And then she was like, The audacity of this woman, she was like, You need to send me testimonials, you need to show me all these things.
• 1:25:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I did not do anything.
• 1:25:30
  SPEAKER_01: All the shit she said in that Voxer, I just deleted Voxer.
• 1:25:33
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I just deleted Voxer and I was like, I'm never gonna talk to this bitch over the fuck again.
• 1:25:37
  SPEAKER_01: Kicked her out of my fucking Facebook group, and that was the fucking end of it.
• 1:25:40
  SPEAKER_01: There's no reason to entertain anything after that.
• 1:25:42
  SPEAKER_01: Like, my contract is done.
• 1:25:43
  SPEAKER_01: I had my team send the last fucking payment.
• 1:25:45
  SPEAKER_01: I sent my last fucking payment like a fucking adult, and that's it.
• 1:25:49
  SPEAKER_01: But overall, in total, it definitely was more than six figures.
• 1:25:52
  SPEAKER_01: It was more than six figures in that nine months.
• 1:25:54
  SPEAKER_01: And what the fuck did I get out of that?
• 1:25:56
  SPEAKER_01: I got you out of that.
• 1:25:57
  SPEAKER_01: You're worth more than six figures.
• 1:25:59
  SPEAKER_01: You're worth more than six figures.
• 1:26:00
  SPEAKER_01: But other than the fucking people, and I choose to believe that that's it.
• 1:26:03
  SPEAKER_01: I needed to have this experience.
• 1:26:05
  SPEAKER_01: I needed to understand things from a different point of view to sharpen my fucking competitive edge and to get me into a room full of people that understand things at a different frequency.
• 1:26:14
  SPEAKER_01: And that was accomplished.
• 1:26:15
  SPEAKER_01: I did create that ROI.
• 1:26:17
  SPEAKER_02: So, how do you feel like this has impacted just one, the way you coach people, and then also like the way did this make you not want to work with a coach anymore for a while, or like how did it affect you like on both sides?
• 1:26:33
  SPEAKER_01: I haven't paid a high ticket coach since I buy smaller things now.
• 1:26:36
  SPEAKER_01: I need help with this like LinkedIn, right?
• 1:26:38
  SPEAKER_01: I need help with LinkedIn, so I bought LinkedIn coaching, right?
• 1:26:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so I'm buying these kind of like small package things that are more conducive to a skill set than mentorship, just because there's a certain level of realization that I just I don't need any of this crap.
• 1:26:52
  SPEAKER_01: This is not support, this is not what I think is support, this is not helpful.
• 1:26:56
  SPEAKER_01: And I think there's a little bit of that self-sovereignty that kicked in following this because I don't need coaching anymore.
• 1:27:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I need mentorship, I want mentorship, I need help with skill sets, but like in the way that I bought from this woman, I'll never buy like that ever again.
• 1:27:12
  SPEAKER_01: I bought from a place of need, thinking that somebody else had something that I don't have.
• 1:27:17
  SPEAKER_01: And I'll never buy that ever the fuck again.
• 1:27:19
  SPEAKER_01: Anything I buy moving forward will be bought from a place of I want this experience, I want to have this person in my life for this amount of time.
• 1:27:27
  SPEAKER_01: I definitely buy slower now.
• 1:27:29
  SPEAKER_01: I buy the small thing first, I have a small experience first.
• 1:27:33
  SPEAKER_01: Had I bought the retreat first, I never would have bought the full coaching program.
• 1:27:36
  SPEAKER_01: That is a lesson that I learned, but it's also reflected into my marketing where like I realized that there's a bunch of wolves in sheep's clothing running around in the coaching industry.
• 1:27:44
  SPEAKER_01: And like people used to tell me that, but I didn't really believe it because I didn't really have terrible experiences.
• 1:27:47
  SPEAKER_01: I had minorly experiences, but I didn't have terrible experiences.
• 1:27:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so like I didn't really see it until that.
• 1:27:54
  SPEAKER_01: And so now like I have a lot more grace for people wanting to buy from me and wanting to buy something small first.
• 1:27:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a lot more.
• 1:28:00
  SPEAKER_01: like understanding and compassionate to that.
• 1:28:02
  SPEAKER_01: And I've shifted a little bit of my product suite to be able to accommodate that.
• 1:28:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, hey, you don't need to go and fucking jump into my 50K.
• 1:28:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like let's not do that.
• 1:28:09
  SPEAKER_01: Let's not start with the 50K.
• 1:28:10
  SPEAKER_01: Why don't you come over here?
• 1:28:11
  SPEAKER_01: Why don't you come to a retreat?
• 1:28:13
  SPEAKER_01: Why don't you have an experience?
• 1:28:14
  SPEAKER_01: Let me show you who I really am.
• 1:28:15
  SPEAKER_01: Let me make sure that this is a good fit for you before you go all in.
• 1:28:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel a lot more aligned with that now and like feeling that feeling because I understand why people are so skeptical because I didn't really understand until this experience.
• 1:28:28
  SPEAKER_02: No, I totally agree with you.
• 1:28:29
  SPEAKER_02: I feel the same way.
• 1:28:30
  SPEAKER_02: And it also made me I'm a very compassionate understanding person and loving person.
• 1:28:36
  SPEAKER_02: But I feel like it made me even more so as a just as a practitioner because I just want people to feel safe and comfortable because that was something that I feel like was the opposite experience in that container.
• 1:28:52
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, it I totally get it.
• 1:28:55
  SPEAKER_02: It makes sense.
• 1:28:56
  SPEAKER_02: Was there anything you felt like you needed to heal after this experience?
• 1:29:00
  SPEAKER_02: Do you feel like it was anything that you had to like heal or process or walk through afterwards.
• 1:29:06
  SPEAKER_01: For me it was a little bit of like the guilt and shame about repeating the pattern.
• 1:29:10
  SPEAKER_01: Even though this wasn't the same narcissistic abuse, right?
• 1:29:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was still a a gradient of it.
• 1:29:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so I still welcomed that I still called that back in again.
• 1:29:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you learned it at the higher level now that you're a little bit more qualified, I guess.
• 1:29:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I definitely needed to clear more of that energy frequency where it's like I'm calling in people that manipulate and abuse and use this way.
• 1:29:32
  SPEAKER_01: Because here's the other thing too is one of the things that I told her in the very beginning of this was that one of the things that's the most painful for me in buying from a coach is that every coach that I've ever worked with has borrowed, we'll put that in air quotes, right?
• 1:29:45
  SPEAKER_01: Borrowed something from me, whether that's like stealing an entire program or stealing clients every coach I've ever worked with has taken something from me and I recognize and I can look at that it's like because I have really great ideas and like I have really great fucking energetic flow and I have really great clients.
• 1:29:59
  SPEAKER_01: Of course they want what I have and what I have is amazing.
• 1:30:02
  SPEAKER_01: I can take that in that's not something that should be happening.
• 1:30:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like your coach should not be using you as your fucking muse.
• 1:30:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like that is unethical to do that.
• 1:30:10
  SPEAKER_01: I never do that with my clients I don't borrow ideas from my coaches.
• 1:30:13
  SPEAKER_01: And that was something that she was like really big on she's like I will never do that to you.
• 1:30:17
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not kidding fucking like literally three weeks after that like I still was on her fucking email and I saw an email go out turn five figure months into five figure days.
• 1:30:25
  SPEAKER_01: That's my shit that is my shit.
• 1:30:27
  SPEAKER_01: But I read the email and it was like literally like verbatim.
• 1:30:30
  SPEAKER_02: It happened to all of us there's been so many things that I came up with that all of a sudden I had a container called Clear Channel and then she created this whole summit with the same name.
• 1:30:43
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm just like that's my name like I came up with that.
• 1:30:48
  SPEAKER_02: Just stuff like that.
• 1:30:49
  SPEAKER_02: And that's one of the other themes that we've been going into is like how she would constantly accuse other people of copying off of her but she was literally copying and stealing stuff from everybody.
• 1:31:02
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm glad you mentioned that because that was one of the last things I wanted to ask you about that I forgot about because I knew that it happened but it's just so funny because that would never even occur to me.
• 1:31:13
  SPEAKER_01: My clients steal shit from me right my clients are borrowing my crap.
• 1:31:17
  SPEAKER_01: I don't even look at them in that way.
• 1:31:19
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't go that way.
• 1:31:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like the ideation that's not how that works.
• 1:31:23
  SPEAKER_02: No, and it's not supposed to and that's the point.
• 1:31:26
  SPEAKER_02: One of the biggest questions we've gotten since we've started this is like red flags.
• 1:31:31
  SPEAKER_02: What are red flags to look for and what are things to look for when you do want to hire somebody I think the biggest red flag that you need to look for is yourself.
• 1:31:40
  SPEAKER_01: You need to look at yourself and you need to have a very transparent vantage point of what are you predisposed to?
• 1:31:45
  SPEAKER_01: What have you done before in relationship?
• 1:31:47
  SPEAKER_01: This is an echo of my abusive relationship.
• 1:31:50
  SPEAKER_01: That's what it is, right?
• 1:31:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so not to say that we need to get coaching before we get coaching, right?
• 1:31:54
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I'm saying?
• 1:31:55
  SPEAKER_01: But it is something to know about yourself.
• 1:31:57
  SPEAKER_01: What are your tendencies?
• 1:31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like I have a tendency to call in narcissistic people because I'm good food for narcissists.
• 1:32:03
  SPEAKER_01: I have definitely struggled with lots of codependency in my life I have a lot of those kind of patterns and like I'm working to clean them up and to do better and reflect and refine.
• 1:32:12
  SPEAKER_01: But like the ripple it's there, right?
• 1:32:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so if you know yourself, if you know what you normally fall for, if you know what normally works for you, then you've got to really look at yourself in that because the red flags are different for all of us.
• 1:32:24
  SPEAKER_01: I know that I'm definitely predisposed to violence and predisposed to manipulation, predisposed to these things because that's the world that I grew up in.
• 1:32:32
  SPEAKER_01: That's the childhood experience that I had that's the relationships experience that I chose again and again and again.
• 1:32:37
  SPEAKER_01: So can you look at your own choices?
• 1:32:39
  SPEAKER_01: Can you look at your own self-sovereignty path and take responsibility for the fucking choices you've made right in your life and understand that like it's likely that you make those same rebble dot patterns.
• 1:32:48
  SPEAKER_01: But it's also knowing like I think that everybody's looking for this perfect coach.
• 1:32:52
  SPEAKER_01: But the fact of the matter is is that that doesn't exist because coaches are people.
• 1:32:55
  SPEAKER_01: And so what you should be looking for is a specific result and what that result is that you want to solve.
• 1:33:01
  SPEAKER_01: What is the problem that you're solving?
• 1:33:02
  SPEAKER_01: What is the result you want to generate?
• 1:33:04
  SPEAKER_01: Does this person actually have the results?
• 1:33:06
  SPEAKER_01: And this is something it's hard.
• 1:33:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's hard to ask that question.
• 1:33:09
  SPEAKER_01: It shouldn't be but it is hard to ask somebody like how much money are you actually making?
• 1:33:13
  SPEAKER_01: What does your client roster look like?
• 1:33:14
  SPEAKER_01: What are these people?
• 1:33:15
  SPEAKER_01: And of course they can still lie to you but at least try.
• 1:33:17
  SPEAKER_01: Do your due diligence and ask people do you have this result?
• 1:33:20
  SPEAKER_01: Tell me I got this result.
• 1:33:21
  SPEAKER_01: Tell me a story about how you got this result.
• 1:33:23
  SPEAKER_01: Go look at their their other client base.
• 1:33:25
  SPEAKER_01: Go talk to another fucking client and maybe talk to a couple because one person may be pretty new in the journey or maybe somebody is like jaded and hates this person for a million different other reasons, right?
• 1:33:35
  SPEAKER_01: But like you can just go look at their social media like people that have been coached by this person and gain a little bit of perspective I think is is relevant.
• 1:33:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I think it's also just really coming down to the fact that you get to trust yourself to create ROI regardless of what does or does not happen.
• 1:33:48
  SPEAKER_01: Look at all the shit that happened not to us but for us because we are not victims of some bumblebee lady right we called this experience in uniquely for ourselves to learn something different about ourselves.
• 1:33:58
  SPEAKER_01: So releasing the need for a safe space you are your safe space regardless of what a fucking coach is or is not fucking doing create the sovereignty inside of yourself.
• 1:34:07
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need other people to create safety for you.
• 1:34:08
  SPEAKER_01: And quite honestly they can't the only thing that people can create safety for themselves and when you really know that you're safe to enter into bubble bee containers like you're not going to die.
• 1:34:17
  SPEAKER_01: It's going to be fine right you're going to learn a fucking lesson that you couldn't have learned any other way.
• 1:34:20
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that moving from a place of fear always perpetuates the cycle of more fear.
• 1:34:25
  SPEAKER_01: So it's really can you move from a place of neutrality and understanding that every fucking experience you create for yourself is going to serve you in one way and limit you in another no matter what to be the best coach in the world there's still going to be a fucking limit on the other side.
• 1:34:37
  SPEAKER_01: And the point is not to have a soul aligned experience.
• 1:34:41
  SPEAKER_01: This is not the partner you're choosing for the rest of your fucking life.
• 1:34:43
  SPEAKER_01: It's a goddamn coach it's supposed to help you with one fucking thing right don't put it on this fucking pedestal like a lot of people do.
• 1:34:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah I know I think that's so true because I I think it's it's really helped me to be like okay what is the specific thing that I want and let me think about that versus the person.
• 1:35:00
  SPEAKER_02: So I know we're coming up on time.
• 1:35:02
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you so much for sharing all of this and can you just share a little bit about where people can find you and just anything you have going on.
• 1:35:10
  SPEAKER_02: I know you have a lot of cool stuff going on.
• 1:35:13
  SPEAKER_01: I would love for you guys to come join the Facebook group.
• 1:35:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's called Unicorn Client Attraction Secrets and for all you entrepreneurs in the room you are welcome to come in and promote and get clients inside of my audience it's over 33,000 entrepreneurs you can come and check out my podcast.
• 1:35:26
  SPEAKER_01: There's a couple episodes about this on the other side that's called Real Unicorns Don't Wear Pants.
• 1:35:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I have a novel that's coming out shortly that kind of explores a lot of these narratives around narcissistic abuse, around domestic violence around being around people like this and like what the echo is of this.
• 1:35:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's not an autobiography it's actually a fiction based book but it chronicles like soul life journey and really how we're exploring these different narratives within the constructs of this realm to the next kind of follows suit in all of these crazy experiences that we have to help you to make sense of it at a bigger wider angle lens and really talks about my experience and how I tap into the collective it's called a shadow called sunshine and that will be launching soon and all the proceeds for this are going to a preventative app that helps parents and teens to create healthy communication dialogue called Real Talk to prevent domestic violence.
• 1:36:20
  SPEAKER_01: There's a lot of support out there to help women after the fact there's a lot of federal grants that go to this there's a lot of local grants that go to this but there's so little work being done in the preventative space and that's what's really near and dear to my heart is because domestic violence and sexual assault should not be a rite of passage.
• 1:36:36
  SPEAKER_01: There's a higher and better way to do this.
• 1:36:38
  SPEAKER_02: When is that coming out?
• 1:36:39
  SPEAKER_02: It launches on June 3rd will be the official launch for the book.
• 1:36:43
  SPEAKER_02: Oh amazing okay that's really exciting and I love that I love all of it and where the proceeds are going and everything.
• 1:36:50
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't know that part.
• 1:36:51
  SPEAKER_02: That's amazing.
• 1:36:52
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
• 1:36:53
  SPEAKER_02: And we'll have to have you back to talk more about that because I feel like that's like a whole thing in itself.
• 1:36:58
  SPEAKER_02: But thank you so much for sharing all this and thank you for being here.
• 1:37:02
  SPEAKER_02: It was amazing.
• 1:37:03
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for having me and always good to fucking hash out all the things spill all the tea thank you so much for being here.
• 1:37:11
  SPEAKER_02: Don't forget to follow the show on Apple or Spotify.
• 1:37:15
  SPEAKER_02: Leave a review and share the show with your friends who you know are yearning for this type of content.
• 1:37:19
  SPEAKER_02: When you leave a review send us a screenshot and we'll send you a$250 credit that you can apply to joining anything new in my world you can stay connected with me by following me on Instagram at elise underscore breeds.
• 1:37:32
  SPEAKER_02: Make sure you download my Clear Trauma cheat sheet at elisebreeds.com.
• 1:37:36
  SPEAKER_02: See you next time