A Confession of Disordered Loves

Language Matters by Elias Winter · Apr 21, 2026 · 56m

I. Before I Explain Myself

Lord, before I explain myself, let me say plainly that I am not innocent.

I have been wounded, yes. I have been lonely, misread, underheld, overtired, and hungry for forms of mercy I did not know how to ask for cleanly. I have lived in exile from many things at once: from nations, from fathers, from stable belonging, from the ordinary ease by which other men seem to move through their days without needing everything to become either revelation or threat. All of that may be true. But it is not the truth that saves. It is only the truth that tempts a man to begin…