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Do narcissists like competition? · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on beautiful people?
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  I am Lee Hammock, the diagnosed selfaware narcissist and welcome
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  to another episode of the Narcissist Code If you knew.
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  Here I use my platform on social media to raise awareness for
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  NPD, give more people in the therapy like myself, and also
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  validate the victims, survivors and thrivers of said disorder
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  and said toxic traits and whatnot.
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  Y'all today's episode is going to be about do narcissists like
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  competition? So before we hop into today's
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  episode y'all make sure you check out my self love journal
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  that's available on Amazon. Lee Hammock I love me a self
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  love journal Help you rebuild their self love and authenticity
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  and identity and what not. You can search Lee Hammock self
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  love on Amazon. But yeah y'all yeah yeah yeah
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  let's hop into it. Do not like I say do narcissists
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  like competition. So this is me.
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  Speaking from a personal perspective, a lot of
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  narcissists do like to compete in things that they can win in
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  things that they are good at in in like and whatnot they love.
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  Like we love competing things that we know we can win.
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  You know what I'm saying? Like in things that we're going
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  to lose or things that can make us feel ashamed of ourselves,
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  things that make us that they can make us feel be a little.
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  Absolutely not. I'm not competing with anybody.
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  I'm not doing anything like that.
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  Me in this, in this situation, in that instance, what I would
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  do is to go back and do some silliness.
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  You see what I'm saying? If, like, I'm.
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  I'm horrible at bowling, right? I cannot bowl for any.
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  Like, I'm probably the worst bowler in North Carolina or this
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  side of you on the East Coast of the United States, right?
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  So I would not bowl. Hey, Lee, you want to go
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  bowling? Hey, you want to bowl?
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  We ain't bowling. You want to be on my team?
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  I'm good. I'm good.
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  I got to do something. I got something to do over here.
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  Or I would just tell people, like, I suck at bowling.
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  I'm not doing it. But everybody and people would
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  just say nobody's a professional over here.
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  We all suck. You know?
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  Everybody sucks. Like, just play.
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  Just play with me one more and I wouldn't play.
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  Narcissists do not like to compete at things that they are
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  good, that are, are not good at things that they don't think
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  that they can win. So absolutely no, they don't
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  want to compete within things like that.
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  They actually want to keep things moving on and not, you
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  know, not compete. They would rather not compete
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  with you not do things like that.
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  They'd rather go the other way and have things run out that
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  way. They want to compete at things
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  that they can win. Now when it comes to their
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  significant others and whatnot, they will compete like hell with
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  their, with their significant others and their siblings and
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  whatnot. Like if you're just learning
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  somebody, just knowing somebody, or like, let's let's separate
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  the two, let's separate the two significant others.
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  They will definitely compete with their significant others,
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  their spouses. Yes, they have to be better than
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  you in some way, shape or form. Just like I just when I just
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  said narcissists hate doing things that they're not good at.
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  They love doing things that they are great, that they are really
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  good at and that you are not good at.
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  They love bringing you into a competition that they know
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  they're going to smash you so they can embarrass you and talk
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  junk. But we know, we know narcissists
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  cannot dish what cannot take what they dish out, right?
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  So if that narcissistic person is great at pool, right, they
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  love playing pool. Pool is their favorite sport,
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  right? So in that, in that situation,
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  in the instance right there, they would want you to play pool
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  with them. And if you suck at pool, if you
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  suck at pool, you'll you'll want to play with it.
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  You're like, Oh yeah, let's have fun.
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  I love to play pool with you. And then they smash you.
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  The whole time they're talking to junk.
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  They're doing trick shots. They put they got the pool cue
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  behind their back. They they didn't pick it up and
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  smacked it like a baseball. They didn't do, they do, they do
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  all kinds of pool shots. You see what I'm saying?
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  They love doing things that they are good at and embarrassing you
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  with their skill. Basketball, football, whatever
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  it is. They love to compete with things
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  that they think they can win. They'll quit, like if or a
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  narcissist is not good at something or you know they'll
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  quit or they just refuse to do it.
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  You mean that's just the mindset and this is the way a lot of
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  narcissists minds work out. That is absolutely the way a lot
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  of narcissists and talks to people's minds work is just goes
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  like that. If I'm good at it, I will
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  compete with you. If I'm not good at it, I'm not
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  going to compete with you. I'm not going to matter of fact,
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  we going, we going to go to the opposite direction.
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  We going to do the opposite thing right here.
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  So they have to be good at what they're doing with you.
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  Now when it comes to the siblings, sibling rivalry, Oh
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  yeah, they'll compete like hell with the siblings because they
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  want to compete with not only they want to compete for prizes
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  and things like that, they want to compete for rewards with
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  their siblings as well. And the reward in this instance,
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  that they feel like, love, care and affection from the parental
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  figure, whoever is raised there. You mean the authority figure.
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  If I beat my brother at this, my dad will love me.
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  If I beat my sister at this, my mom will love me, and vice
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  versa, so on and so forth. Whatever.
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  If I beat my cousin or could be cousins too.
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  If I beat my cousin at this, my grandma will love me, our our
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  auntie will love. It's just so many different
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  things. They would love to compete with
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  their siblings and whatnot because it gets into that space.
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  But narcissistic people, if you do beat them in some type of
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  competition, they'll want to. And they consider themselves
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  somewhat decent at it. They will want to compete with
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  you. They will.
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  They will want to compete with you until they win.
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  You can beat them 15 * 20 times and they beat you one time.
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  They happy said That's all they need.
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  Oh God, who got to win? My and my win was better.
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  My win was way better than yours.
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  I'm glad. I'm glad.
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  You good comp, good comp. You, you good competition and
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  what not. You're a great competition.
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  I I'm so thankful for you. Thank thanks for being here.
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  Blah blah, blah, Boo, Boo, Boo, BBB.
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  That's literally how it goes. So y'all they will literally
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  beat you down mentally and like I said and then they they
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  they'll win it. They'll beat you down till they
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  win. They'll keep playing until they
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  win. Well, Les Brown said this.
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  Les Brown said it's not over till I win.
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  And that's exactly how it goes. He wants to win.
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  You see what I'm saying? They want to win in these in
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  these spaces, right here, because winning makes them feel
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  good. They don't want to keep
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  consistently winning. They want to constantly win.
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  They want to keep things moving forward so that they can feel
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  like it's worth it to go on like and winning and being better
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  than you and stuff and competing with stuff with you allows and
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  helps them feel better than you. You know, narcissists want to
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  have something that they're better than you at playing cards
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  and stuff like that. It it they just do y'all.
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  It's one of those things like they love to compete, but most
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  times only if they win some Narciss will be fun, outgoing
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  and compete if even if they're going to lose.
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  And things like that. One of my one of my old good
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  friends, super overt narcissist, he super overt narcissist.
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  And he loves doing things that he's not good at because it gets
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  him attention. Like if he if he can get him
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  some type of attention, he'll do it.
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  So you do have the narcissists out there that want to compete
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  and do things that they're not good at, just to get attention
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  from somebody else just to be loud and try to be funny while
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  doing it. Well, I'm losing.
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  Damn, I suck. Dang.
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  And then people notice that just like, well, he lets you plan and
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  he he's picked off women doing it.
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  So that does work. Let's say if it benefits them,
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  they'll be bad at something and compete with, compete at you,
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  compete with you about it if they like, say if it benefits
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  them, if there's a benefit to be gained from being bad and
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  competing, they'll compete then, yeah, so some of them will
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  absolutely do that. But also you do get the
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  narcissistic person who gets addicted to the competition,
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  right? Who gets addicted to competition
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  like they get addicted to winning, like.
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  And that's why you see a quite a few narcissistic people.
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  They develop gambling addictions and you know they get addicted
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  to like FanDuel and DraftKings and going to the casino and you
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  know three car Monte and things like that.
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  Those are the talk like games like that where you get
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  narcissistic people out there playing cards and stuff, three
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  car Monte and things like that. They'll you'll lose.
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  You'll take the hold on. Your narcissist will lose your
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  whole vacation fund out there, gambling at at card games and
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  stuff like that, that they think they can win because their pride
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  won't let them stop playing. When they once they lose $100,
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  they got to win it back. They got to win their
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  PlayStation 4. That's that's actually happened
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  to me before at carnival. I lost like $400.00 and it's
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  before I had that $4.00 would make or break me back in the
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  day. So I was like, damn, that sucks,
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  you know what I mean? So you do get some of them who
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  get addicted to it, who do get addicted to the gambling and
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  things like that. And like, it's not when I say
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  competition, y'all. It's not just sports.
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  I know people, when I say compete competition, they
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  automatically shift to sports because that's what my mind goes
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  to. But I'm also talking about
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  competing with you in grades in school, competing with you at,
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  you know, at chess. I don't know if the chess is
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  for. I think it is the checkers,
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  whatever games, that type of stuff right there as well.
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  You know, they'll be willing to step outside the box if it
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  benefits them in some way, shape or form.
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  That's what I tell people. Like if it benefits them, they
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  will do it. You know if it if they can glean
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  some sort of benefit from competing at something that
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  they're bad at, they will still do that.
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  Yeah. Compete like competition works.
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  It works everywhere. Y'all social media stuff like
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  that. Like it doesn't have to be
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  games. It can be like building building
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  a social media account. Like I have narcissist other
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  like other selfaware narcissist who like literally hate my guts
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  because I my account, my account is bigger than theirs and they
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  avoid me and I I blocked a bunch of them but it ain't that's how
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  it goes. Like they got they want to
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  compete because they see they they feel like numbers matter
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  and this is one thing about a lot of narcissist.
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  Y'all, even if they win, they won't be happy.
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  There's they won't be content. I'll say that even if they win
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  something, they'll be happy for a few seconds.
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  They can feel happiness for a few minutes, for whatever, but
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  it eventually goes away. And when it goes away, this one,
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  this, sometimes the depression can kick in.
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  Like the after the high of winning goes away, the
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  depression kicks in. So yeah, if a narcissistic
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  person is competing and they're consistently winning, sometimes
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  they're waiting to chase that high of happiness, then you know
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  the happiness high. They're chasing after that and
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  trying to trying to do things of that nature.
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  Y'all. So you have to you yourself have
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  to empower yourself to keep moving forward and whatnot.
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  You know you have to because if you don't keep it, I said you
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  got a narcissistic person to dragging you to compete at
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  something you're bad at and you don't want to.
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  You don't want to compete with them because you know they're
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  going to win and rub it in your face.
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  Y'all. Don't be.
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  Don't be pressured into competing with a narcissistic
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  person. That because they're either way.
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  It's a lose lose anyway. If you compete and lose, they're
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  going to talk with junk or trying to hurt your feelings.
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  If you don't compete, they're going to talk with junk or
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  trying to hurt your feelings. So it's do.
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  It's kind of damned if you do, damned if you don't.
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  I tell people to pick the damned that makes them feel the best
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  about the situation. Choose the damned that you feel
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  is best for you. Pick the damned that makes you
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  feel. Sometimes that makes you feel
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  good. That's that's all I got to say
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  on that one. Y'all.
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  Anyways, y'all thank you. I'll TuneIn to another episode.
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