Latest / Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce / 138. Have You Heard of Human Design?! Unlocking Self Awareness in Life After Divorce with: Madeline Evergreen

Transcript

138. Have You Heard of Human Design?! Unlocking Self Awareness in Life After Divorce with: Madeline Evergreen · Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce

• 0:49
  Speaker 1: In this episode, you are going to learn about what human design is, where it came from and how it can help you both heal from this divorce and be more prepared to date in the future.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: You're going to learn about neutrinos and how they have changed your DNA, and you're going to hear about how breathwork can actually help you release pain stuck in your subconscious mind.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Let's dig in.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: Hi love, welcome to Dear Divorce Diary, the podcast helping divorcees go beyond talk therapy to process your grief, find the healing you crave and build back your confidence.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, dawn Wiggins, a therapist, coach, integrative healer and divorcee.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: Join me for a fresh approach to healing grief and building your confidence after divorce.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Hi love, today we are going to talk about human design, and human design is a very interesting concept that helps us really achieve deeper levels of self-awareness and self-acceptance.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: And so, to learn about human design today, we have with us Madeline Evergreen healthy Madeline on Instagram, who I have been learning a lot of human design deliciousness from on her podcast and whatnot, and we are going to bring her in today to talk all things human design and healing.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: Madeline, welcome.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: Hi Dawn, Thank you so much for having me.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: I am just thrilled to be here today.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: So I found you through a mutual friend on Instagram.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: I love how Instagram creates such like delicious connections Like we've never met in real life, but you have such a beautiful light and you share so beautifully about all things healing.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: You have a rich history of kind of multiple modalities.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Right, I know you're a yoga instructor.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: You do breath work, Is that right?
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: And yeah, yeah, I actually don't teach yoga, but I teach pretty much all other fitness.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: I've been teaching fitness since I was actually 14 years old and so yeah, I'm really familiar with a lot of different exercise modalities, except pretty much not yoga.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Lot of different exercise modalities, except pretty much not yoga.
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: I've done it, but it's you know.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: I've never taught yoga, but definitely breathwork is a huge part of my personal life and also what I bring to my students who come to me for human design.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: I kind of weave all that in, so start with a little bit of your story.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: right, you started in fitness at 14 and tell us you know up to and through breathwork and human design and then, like, cap it off with what is human design?
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Totally?
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: So let's even back up to age zero.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: So when I was born, I already had massive health problems and pretty much the first sentence that I ever said was that my knees hurt and I grew up just in pain and had severe bloating and digestive issues.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: I had growth hormone deficiency.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I had so many struggles with my body and with my health and by the time I was in high school I was understanding things like gluten or sugar or diet things, and so I went down the track of healthy eating.
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: I had also been really into exercise and I was a dancer.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: I started teaching group fitness so young, because my mom owned a fitness business and it was just kind of natural.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: I was there might as well be teaching, and I never really got better, though, from all the exercise, or definitely when I started implementing the nutrition, I did a lot like a lot for my health and it didn't really help much.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: Little things would make me feel a little better here and there.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: But honestly, I was suffering all the way through my teens, all the way through my 20s and then, towards the end of my 20s or my 30s, I started to hear about this thing human design.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: By now I had also been really into spirituality.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: I had been doing breath work for about a decade.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: I was aware of manifestation and all kinds of things.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: Mindset, mindset and a lot of that stuff was helping me.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: But I still really suffered with my health and when I learned about human design it was actually in a manifestation course that I was taking and at the very end of this course I learned that if you just learn about your human design, then you can learn how you manifest best.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: And I was like oh well, give me the secret key.
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like hello.
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: Why aren't we all doing this?
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: And so.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: I just went insane with human design.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: Like I was obsessed.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: I've never been more obsessed with anything.
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: I don't know what it is about human design, but it just clicked for me.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: It's really natural and I just couldn't stop learning.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: And it ended up feeling like.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: That's when you know right that you found the thing.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: It's the best feeling in the world, yeah.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I was like spending hours and hours with my friends, like looking at their charts and trying to figure it all out.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: And then I got trained and my whole career is this now.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: But what happened to me personally I think this is why it really clicked for me is that when I started to implement my own human design, I had a huge body transformation.
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: Most of my health problems just disappeared and I didn't change, like my diet or my supplements.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: I didn't do anything different physically I really did not, but my body shrunk way down.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: I lost a lot of inflammation and puffiness, way fewer digestive issues, way less stress, and I just couldn't believe it.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: I mean every moment of every day of my entire life I felt like I was suffering.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: Discomfort.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and so to have that just kind of fizzle out within literally about a month, it was very quick.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: I just couldn't believe it.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Wow, so you and I were chatting just before I hit record, right, and one of the things because we were talking about how to make this relatable for women going through divorce, because we were talking about how to make this relatable for women going through divorce and self-acceptance, right, you think that that's the massive function that happened there when you found human design and you started living within your design.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: It's like, yes, living within your design, but there's this level of self-acceptance that came with that.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it started for me with actually self-understanding.
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: I remember just a couple of months before I learned about human design, I was really struggling personally because I didn't know what I should be motivated by in life.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: Like I didn't know should I be motivated by helping people or by money or fun or pleasure, because I can get on board with all those things and I was really really struggling with just knowing, like where's my little slice of the world?
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: Like what do I have to offer beyond, just like a service?
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: But like what kind of perspective should I have?
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: Who am I?
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: Where do I belong?
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: Where do I fit in?
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: What path am I meant for?
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like big existential questions.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: Really big.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: I was feeling this huge like cloud over me for months before I found human design where I just felt like what is the right?
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: Like who am I underneath all the things I do?
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: And that includes in my marriage like all of it applied to my marriage, Like what should motivate me in my marriage to continue being a good like a good wife, whatever that is yeah, right, but that's how we think, right, yeah.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: And like how should I show up for my husband?
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: Like there's all these options, they all sound great and I can't do them all.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: So what, what?
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: And then when I learned about human design.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: For anyone who doesn't know what this is, it's simply a user manual for yourself.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: It's an individual blueprint of who you are at an energy level, like what works for you, what doesn't, how should your energy levels look?
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: What's a sign that you're in alignment and out of alignment?
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: And it's just an enormous amount of information.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: That's truly like a manual, like here's your user manual for your stove and here's your user manual for you as a person.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: And I just started following it and it was simple, simple, simple things for me, Like I learned very quickly, according to my design, pleasure and desire is like all over my chart.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: The the um concept of need or survival or scarcity is all for me a sign that I'm like way off.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: And what's fascinating is that for other people, those are signs that they're actually in alignment.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: Some people should be motivated by survival or scarcity.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: And so when I started to put on the lens of what actually is like an authentic perspective for me, my entire body and my whole mind just relaxed, yeah, wow, okay.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: So we have to start with the basics.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: So human design is a blueprint for each of our individual sense of wellbeing and energy in the world.
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: But where do we get this blueprint?
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: Where does it come from?
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Like practically, yeah, like literally, like okay, okay, yeah.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: So I know, know, right, I can go to a website, I can pull it up.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: What am I?
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: Where does it come from?
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: How did we get this blueprint?
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: Got it?
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: so in the late 80s I always forget the exact year, but like 1988, something like that a man named ra uru, who he was in spain.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: He just this is his story.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: So this is his story, so everybody can take it or leave it.
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: He says that he heard a voice and he heard all this information and he spent 11 days writing out all of human design, and this is coming from a man who doesn't believe in God, that's what he says so fascinating, right Wild.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: And it's tied to a number of different modalities.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: So there's astrology involved, there's the Chinese I Ching, the Kabbalah tree of life, the chakra system.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: So there's this whole combo of different modalities that were already established.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: And to get your human design chart, I like to go to the website myhumandesigncom, but there's other websites too that are just fine.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: And you put in your birth time, your birth date and the location, and then it pulls up this really weird looking chart that isn't going to make any sense but, there's usually a little description, or then you dive into learning human design or get a reading something like that to have it interpreted.
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's how right.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: I was in touch with someone who was interested in human design.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: I was talking about human design and it made me interested and so that's what I did.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: I went and I put my information into a chart and I started looking at it and then not quite as much as you, but like got really hungry, Like what is this?
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, my goodness, this makes so much sense.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: It feels so validating, Right.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: So let's talk for a minute about.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: There's a level of like woo-woo-ness right to all of this, where you have to kind of take a leap of faith to get value or benefit from this chart, from this blueprint.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: You have to kind of take a leap of faith that where and when and how you were born means something in the greater context of the universe.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, totally.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: I encourage people that if you feel at all interested in it or you feel a little bit of a pull towards this, then maybe it's for you to start exploring.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: If you feel highly turned off by it, then maybe it's not for you.
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: But, there's also an enormous amount of science that goes into this.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: We don't need to get into all the science today, but just know for the non-woo-woo interested people human design is a highly scientific modality.
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: It's actually not even classified as spiritual.
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: Lots of spiritual people are into it and are interested, but it does actually tie into quite a bit that happens within something called neutrinos.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: So, neutrinos are very, very tiny particles and they carry information and they're so small that they can pass through physical objects like bodies or walls or you know all that.
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: A table Versus like a light particle is really big, it bounces off the wall.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: And the neutrino is carrying information.
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: And the moment that you're born, and also roughly three months before you're born, the neutrinos that are passing through the body of the baby are carrying information from the planets at the moment, like what's happening energetically in the planets.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: And it really shapes your entire future in that lifetime.
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: It goes through your body, it embeds some information, it actually affects your DNA quite a bit and bam, here you are with this blueprint.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: And this is like the coolest thing.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: I was explaining this to someone and as soon as I use the word neutrinos, they're like oh yeah, that's totally a thing, neutrinos are real.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: And then, right, that validated it.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I love that you bring up the neutrinos, because this is a verifiable scientific concept widely accepted in the world of science.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: This is not woo-woo.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: Neutrinos are not woo-woo.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: They are very much packets of information that can move through physical barriers and are embedded in, and these are things that we don't really learn in grade school, if you will, things that we don't talk about at the water cooler, necessarily, right, I wish we did yeah Right, but massively impact how we live and how we love and how the world works and how we relate to one another.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: So okay, so we all had neutrinos pass through our body three months before we were born and then when we're born, Right and it and and it kind of sets a map for who we are and how we function.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: Yes, what else before we dig into like how to really make this meaningful in our lives, what else should we know, kind of about the basics of human design?
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: When you learn about your human design at first, I recommend the first thing you find out is what is your energy type?
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: There's five different energy types and everybody always talks about them.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: You've probably heard some of these words like generator, manifesting generator, projector, reflector and manifester.
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: So those are the different energy types and when you master your energy type which you're never going to master it, but when you really really dig in and peel back the layers of that, you end up benefiting from almost all of the rest of your human design.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: It's like the biggest bang for your buck to really get the energy type.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: And what happens with a lot of people, or at least a lot of new students that come to me, is that they've heard of their energy type.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: They learned about it for like a week and then it got kind of boring and then they moved on to all the sexier parts of the chart, all the details all the little like tiny, unique things, and then they?
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: I see they don't really get their energy type.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: They're not living it Not living it.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, in order to benefit from human design, like how I did, and have a life transformation, you actually have to change your life and do it Like you have to follow your manual.
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: You can't just read it?
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: And that's the part that most people really dislike, because it requires that you get real honest about where you're living out of alignment, which usually means that shame or guilt or something will come up because you were doing something on purpose, because you thought it made you a good girl or thought it made you successful.
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: Then you realize oh my God, that thing that I've put all this money or all this time, or all this energy to is actually not Not an alignment.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: Mm-mm.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: And so you got to get comfortable first being honest with yourself and taking a good hard look at your life and then slowly like slowly make some changes and feel in your body.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: Does it make you relax when you've made this change?
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: Does it actually feel more like you than you ever could have expected?
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: And when you feel resistant to making the change.
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: It's very important to open your mind to the possibility that there's a part of you trying to keep you safe and trying to keep you in your old ways.
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: I've heard you talk about this on Instagram and on your podcast, so let's talk about that in the context of women moving through divorce, right, because that's where we are.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: So talk about that resistance to implementing things that are deeply in alignment, right.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: Why do we sometimes resist moving into alignment?
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: Well, a system in distortion loves to stay in distortion, mm-hmm, and that just simply means that you have like a safety net in your body.
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: A lot of people will call it the ego.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: Whatever you want to call it, you have this aspect of your subconscious that wants to just keep you safe.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: It cares only about survival.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: And so what you've been doing so far in life has kept you alive.
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: So that must mean that you're safe.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: So that must mean that we should just keep doing what we're doing.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: Even if it's something that you can tell in your consciousness is not right for you anymore.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: And so when your eyes are opened to a new way of doing something whether maybe you went through a divorce and now you're learning a new way to be yourself or a new way to be on your own, or whatever you're learning, or you're contemplating having a divorce and you're trying to get in touch with your own truth, you're going to probably find some new information on the way, or some advice or something that you could try that's new to you, and then it's likely that there will be this deep, dark part of you that resists and wants you to stay how you were, because that's safe, because it's kept you alive, even if it's making you unhappy, even if it's making you have anxiety or stress or making you gain weight.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: It doesn't matter what the thing is.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: It wants that familiarity.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: Yes, even a shift for the good, it's almost always going to come with some sort of discomfort or resistance, either physically or mentally or emotionally.
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: For me, when I've made a lot of changes in my life too quickly, my life gets better and I feel a deep sense of depression.
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: It's very strange, so interesting.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like under everything, I'm like what's going on?
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: Who am I?
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: I feel like I don't have my safety wheels on and I'm like ah, like it just is this underlying sense of I'm lost and I don't know where I am.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: Something's wrong, yes, even though everything looks good.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: This is one of the reasons why I wanted to have you on so badly, because I've heard you say this about the system and distortion, right, and I'm a therapist and I have a podcast and we talk about all the things and I practice all the things.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: But even so, right, sometimes you just hear something that's so delicious.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: I have found in my own life that sometimes, when I have some of my juiciest moments right, where I'll have like amazing conversation with someone or I'll have achieved something that feels like just really magical, and then within hours I'll go into some sort of a spiral about right, like some bad girl spiral, and that's what that is.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: It's that system and distortion that doesn't feel super comfortable being so joyful, so happy, so in alignment.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: It's so new, it's so unfamiliar, right.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: That it's like oh wait, we're not where we're supposed to be.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, and so it's an interesting thought for our listeners to be like.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: Well, how do I know if that's like really appropriate cautionary resistance or if that's just like old programming to let go?
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a good question and it's so nuanced and it's so specific.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: So do you mean, like, how do I know if something's a red flag and if it's actually a sign for me to get out?
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: Or am I just having resistance Is?
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: that what you're asking, yeah.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, that's something you can actually learn about your design.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: Like there's literal ways that different people feel different things.
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: Like some people should only be tuning into how they feel emotionally when they're going to make a decision.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Other people should not be tuning into their emotions and they should tune in to like an instant instinct, like a snap judgment.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: Other people should tune into logic and actually really think through things logically.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: Other people should not.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: And so if someone's learning about human design, that's called the authority.
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: But all you really need to know is that when you dig into your human design, you actually learn like, what does my decision maker sound like?
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: And then you also learn what's your own personal red flag For my design.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: If I have overwhelming frustration and anger, that's a red flag for me that something's wrong, and it's usually a sign that I'm either like behaving out of alignment and I need to change my behavior or get out of the situation, or I need to, like take a good hard look at my attitude and switch my perspective on things.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: But everybody has kind of like this red flag feeling.
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: That's like beep, beep, beep.
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: Pay attention, something's off.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: And minus frustration.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so this is why I love human design so much.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: So, especially for women who are trying to rebuild their trust in themselves, their trust in people, their trust in building relationships right, having your human design chart is a game changer in terms of being able to connect with yourself and others and trust again, because you have this blueprint for decision making, for knowing what yeah, what a red flag is for you and kind of eliminating, like all of the advice that people are going to give you, even that therapists would give you right.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: But if it's not true to your chart and your design, then it's not for you.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: Yes, totally, totally Like for me with the concept of like there's so much pleasure and desire all over my chart, like that's really what I should be using to make my decisions.
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: Like what makes me feel the most attraction or pleasure or excitement or joy, pick those things.
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: That is drastically different than how I was raised.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: My mom is a completely different person, completely different design.
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: She's a whole other.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: She taught me to be a different way and so now I understand.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'm in my relationship and obviously I'm in a marriage.
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: Obviously, there's really difficult times in marriage and I don't just have it easy.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: And when I'm going through a hard time with my husband, I have to tune into my own.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: Like navigator of like is this still pleasurable, or how can we get to the pleasure?
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: Rather than like let's logic our way through the problem or let's um, I don't know make an instinctual decision really fast Like those things are not for me.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: I and again, this is very nuanced.
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: If this is the first time anybody's ever heard of this, I could understand.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: It may not be clicking fully, but just know that if you don't know how you show up, like what your perspective is on things, that's correct for you.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: It's really really hard to be in relationship and it's even harder to have been in relationship and now be single and trying to figure out wait, who am I and who was he and who were we, and yeah, yeah, and so I love this because, you know, when I learned about human design, right started pulling everybody's charts right.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: So now when I have a new patient as a therapist, right, that's one of the things that automatically will pull your chart.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: In the beginning of working together Pulled my kid's chart because of exactly what you're describing right.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: I don't want to be mothering a child that has a completely different chart with a completely different authority, and teaching her my way when she has her own way and then pulling my husband's chart completely changed.
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: Now my husband has his own business, but he also edits the podcast and handles so much of the back end of the business.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: So we work together also, and my husband is so different in terms of his authority, his energy type, his profile, and so understanding his profile was such a game changer for our marriage because I was able to love him in a way that he really needs to be loved and respected because I can be a driver.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: He's a 5'1" not to get in the weeds about it, but he needs to go a lot slower.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: He needs to go a lot deeper into things, and so, whereas I'm a quick start, it just really helped us navigate differently in a way that caused so much less conflict and so much less tension.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: It's been so valuable.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, what's your profile?
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: I am a 6'2 generator.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: Okay, so the profile is one of my favorite things to learn about.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: When in relationship whether it's a spouse or someone you're dating, or a friend or a coworker, like literally any social dynamic it's very helpful to understand the profile.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: And the profile in human design is like the personality type, so you'll have two numbers.
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: Like I'm a four, six.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: Everybody has two numbers.
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: My daughter's a four, six.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, how fun.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: The numbers mean different things.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: They mean like almost like your own little archetype, and the first number is how you see yourself and the second number is how everybody see yourself and the second number is how everybody else sees you.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: So when you understand the different profiles it's kind of like you.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: You understand what you have in common with someone else and what you have, um, like a lot of dynamics or chemistry or clashing with someone else.
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: So so for my husband and I our profiles are like as opposite as they can get, but our energy is almost the same.
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: So, like how we operate energetically is very similar, which makes things really great, but our personalities make me feel like we speak different languages.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: It's like I totally can't relate to him in so many ways.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: But now that I know about these personality types it makes it actually fun and exciting and way more interesting rather than very, very irritating each other's nuances rather than trying to kind of encourage like homogenous, like no, do it more.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: like how I do it Right, no, it's like, oh, there's a whole way you do it and it's nuanced and it's rich and it's deep, and let me understand that.
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: And I think that's why I also love using it with patients so much.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: Because I think historically I have a theory that talk therapy is dead.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: Much because I think historically I have a theory that talk therapy is dead, which is a funny thing for a therapist to say.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: But I think that therapists historically interpret people for them and I don't think that's useful.
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: Therapists need not be telling people how to be right.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: We need to help people understand more of who they are and how they need to do it best.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: And that's what I love about pulling my patients charts is gosh.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: There's just such a rich context and a roadmap for who you are and I'm here to help you be more of that not more of what I think or feel or believe.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, and so it can actually like.
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: I actually feel like human design has saved my marriage in a lot of ways, because if I didn't understand why my husband was so different than me, I probably would still be really, really bothered by the differences and wondering like why doesn't he just do it my way?
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: Or like those kind of conflicts really came up for us a lot.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: And when I understood oh my god, this is actually how he's made and it's a good thing.
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: It's a good thing how cool.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: Let's leverage that.
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, like it seems so simple and I know that everybody can get there without human design, like definitely self exploration, self-discovery, trial and error, but it can take years or decades or a lifetime and in like a day when I remember learning like oh my God, this is his personality.
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: Wow, that's pretty cool, I didn't know.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: So let's talk about integration, right, like how do you use breath work to integrate this?
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: How do you see people implementing this in a way that really transformed their lives?
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: Give us the good stuff about what makes this special and unique in the implementation.
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: Sure, so I have been trained in a number of different breathwork modalities, but the type of breathwork generally I recommend is like it's a transformational experience.
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: It's not a physical breathing exercise to benefit your health.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: When I say breathwork, just think like a journey you go on for emotional release or for more inspiration or clarity, or it's an opportunity to get yourself into an altered state, naturally with your breath rather than with a substance like ayahuasca, but a way to get into an altered state just with the breath, just with the music and the intention, so that you can release a ton of stuff in your subconscious that's blocking you from having a better life.
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: And so why I pull this into human design is because I have seen my students fail a lot just from learning human design.
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: Just learn, learn, learn, learn, learn, learn.
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: Read all the books, become obsessed like master the information and then they physically can't actually change their life because they have too much programming and too many tangled up limiting belief systems and stress being held in the body and trauma and all this stuff that it's like you're not actually capable of a life transformation because you're too clogged with all that subconscious junk.
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: So when I use breath work with my students, I actually encourage them to forget about any kind of intentions or expectations from the breath work.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: I don't ask people to think about something specific you want to get from the breath work, because I know that your body knows the priority of what needs to come up for release first.
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: Yes, so I facilitate with the whole breathwork experience.
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: It's about an hour-long experience with breathing and music.
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: We can do it online.
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: I do it in person all the time, but in a group where you're breathing, you're tuning into the music and you're handing over the reins to your body, and what happens is that emotions come up A lot of times.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: People will cry, they might scream, they might have a temper tantrum or bang on like a bunch of pillows.
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: They might just lay there flat and not move and feel like they're having a psychedelic vision experience.
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: They might get extreme laser focus.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: Clarity on something A lot of different things can happen, and what's really incredible is that more happens than we're ever going to be aware of.
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: Way more, because the way that the music works and the way that the breathing works is that it hits you at such a deep cellular level.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: Vibrationally.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: Yes, vibrationally, like you can even do this if you're deaf and you days after a breath work, and that's like the time when you really can change.
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: Now it's like you just when there's openness.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: Yes, if you just throw out everything in the junk drawer and you have this beautiful, clean, empty drawer that you can fill with what you want to fill it with Intentionally, and so this is where you could implement something, for instance, like human design from a clean space, an open space.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, we're not clogged with negative beliefs.
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, and programming.
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: Totally yeah.
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: So I encourage everybody that's doing any sort of life transformation, whether it's through human design or anything else.
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: Find a way to tap into your subconscious issues and clear them out.
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: It could be breathwork, or it could be so many other modalities as well.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's what I love.
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: Right Over here we do a lot of EMDR, but gosh, what you do is so amazing and I've certainly experienced the benefits of all sorts of modalities.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: But tell us how you aim to experience breathwork and how you implement that.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: I love this story so much.
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: So I was a very unhappy teenager and I was just so miserable, probably because I had so many health problems.
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: I had a.
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: My life was fine for the most part.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: I did have some trauma with my parents, but for the most part my life was look good on paper but I was just miserable and my mom was always saying you should do breath work.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: You should do breath work and I would say, all right where like oh fine, I'll go when is it?
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: And then she would say, oh, I have no idea, look it up.
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: And I would look it up and I couldn't find it.
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: It was like I've never heard of breathwork.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: This was in like 2006, 2007, when she started mentioning it to me and I couldn't find it.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: And then so, finally, probably in 2010, she's still saying this to me and I couldn't find it.
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: And then so, finally, probably in 2010, she's still saying this to me and I was like where is it?
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: And she's like, well, I think that the person that I first did breathwork with, like 20 years ago, this is my mom talking, I think her name was Linda Starwolf, something like that.
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: So I looked her up.
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: I found this woman, Linda Starwolf.
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: She's the founder and the creator of Shamanic Breathwork.
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: She had this whole retreat center in the mountains in North Carolina and I called and I just said hello, I'm signing up for the month-long retreat.
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: I don't know what this is.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: I'm coming.
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: Here's my credit card.
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: Wow, I know.
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: I really didn't know what it was and I didn't care.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: I was so unhappy.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: Desperate.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just was like I just want to get out of here.
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: Whatever, I'll go.
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I went to the mountains for a month and I remember I sat down in this like opening circle and Star Wolf, the woman.
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: She was there and we were supposed to go around and introduce ourselves and I still was in this kind of funk, really bad attitude.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: And then all of a sudden, it was my turn to introduce myself and I burst into tears and I was shaking and I was like I don't know why I'm crying, I don't know why I'm here, I don't know what's going on, I don't know anything.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: And she looked at me and she's like oh, madeline, we have a divine appointment.
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: We met when you were one.
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: I had no idea.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: My mom didn't remember this until after I told her Apparently.
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: We met like out on the sidewalk she was staying at our neighbor's house when I was a baby and we met and she just was like oh, you're going to do breathwork with me someday.
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: And bam, there I was in my 20s doing this Totally changed my life, opened my eyes to so much of my problems and why I was the way that I was, and I got trained in it and took a couple of years to do all my trainings.
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: It was kind of a big ordeal, yep, and I've been doing it ever since.
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: Ever since, and so this is what you do when you teach in groups.
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: You're teaching not just human design, you're pairing it with breathwork, and the one facilitates the implementation of the other.
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the perfect combination and I just don't believe that people can just change from learning.
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: It's like very left-wing, we can't think ourselves out of into healing.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: We can't right, we can't think ourselves well, we have to, yeah, transform at a cellular level.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: Your story is amazing.
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: I know you know that, but it is such an inspiration because I think your story much like mine, or the women who are listening.
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: We go through life and we're suffering, suffering, suffering.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: And then, ka-chow, here comes a solution out of left field.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: Right, but how many women have a solution come out of left field and they don't recognize it?
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: They don't realize it's the solution because it's like I don't know, something scares them.
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: What are your thoughts about that?
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: You know what I think about that concept every day.
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: It is one of these things that I don't understand, because, when I look at myself, I've always been willing to do something when, I don't really get it.
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: I don't understand, like the breath work.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: I don't know what this is I don't really care, but great.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: But I'm going to do it anyway.
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've just always been able to just step into the river of the unknown and just try and then explore, and then, if it's not for me and just move on.
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: And I see with a lot of people that's the first block, that if there's not enough proof or if it's not comfortable enough, or you don't have enough information, we're not even going to open the door or think about it.
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: And honestly, I don't know.
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know why that is.
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: It's something I really deeply desire helping people with, but I can't relate.
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: I really can't relate, and so I don't know what to say to that.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: It's the sixes in our profiles, right, the sixes that are just like.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go first.
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: I agree Like this question keeps me up at night sometimes, right, because it's the hurdle we want to help women overcome, very much it is, and sometimes I wonder like I consider most of my life to have had a lot of suffering and pain, and maybe that's why I'm willing to just try anything.
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I relate to that Like I don't want to have a bad life and sometimes I wonder if people have had a really like a good life for the first half, if it makes it hard to do hard things.
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: I don't know, it's a super interesting concept.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: You know, I recently read a book called Trauma in the Pews by Dr Janine McConaughey, and that one was really interesting because it talked about some of the patriarchal stuff, right, that puritanical patriarchal like, where we get afraid if we've been raised in a particular religion that was particularly rigid, that we actually get afraid to try anything that's outside of that framework.
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: There's that resistance that you talk about in the body, like nope, this religion and this way is how we survive, and if we step outside of that it's really scary to even explore outside of that framework.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: So I'm sure there's more than one thing that contributes to the fear of trying new.
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: But I agree, exploring into new, unknown spaces it's terrifying.
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: But it's also been where I've found the greatest kind of redemption or deliverance or transformation or good stuff, right, like yeah, yeah.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think a good guiding light like if we're going to talk about generalization for everybody is if you have like this little bit of fascination with something, or it looks interesting, or you linger, there's a sign that there's more there for you.
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: Trust that, yeah, a little fascination, trust that.
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: Take it a little deeper, a little deeper a little deeper.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: Play with it.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: Love that trust that.
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: Take it a little deeper.
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: A little deeper, a little deeper.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: Play with it.
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: Love that, Okay.
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: So for someone who wants to come find you and wants to learn more about breathwork or human design, where would you like them to look first to connect with you?
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: The best place to connect with me would be over on Instagram and you can find me at healthy underscore Madeline.
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: I make a lot of really fun, quick, little like easy to learn reels about different aspects of human design, so that's a fun way to just get a feel for like a little more about human design.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: Then head over to my podcast.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: It's called the Beginner's Guide to Human Design Podcast and it's kind of like a course in human design so you can start from episode one.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: if you're a brand new beginner and just listen in order, and if you're wanting to work with me and you really learn human design and do breathwork, then you would absolutely want to be in my program Manifest with Madeline.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: It's a group program where you can learn human design in a much more affordable way than just doing one-on-one readings which I do as well.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: I just love groups and I recommend the group even more.
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: Oh, I think the groups it's like, where you have cool conversations and connections and learn by doing more than just learn by learning right, Like learn by doing is what happens in a group and it's so cool.
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: It is yeah, yeah, and I can't tell you the number of times where my students say like, oh my God, when Susie asked that, it blew my mind.
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: I've never heard somebody say it that way and it truly is the group dynamic that you get the most benefit from.
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, and my website is madelineevergreencom, so you can find anything that you need to book or purchase or sign up for on there.
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Thank you so much for being with us today.
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: I just knew I needed to connect with you and there's just such a magic you bring.
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: You share your light with the world so beautifully.
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: I loved watching your trip to Paris with your husband and I mean we could talk for days.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: But the way that you pair human design and the way that you move through the world using that and encouraging other people to heal and find their truth and their voice and their path, you are such a light, thank you.
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: Wow, thank you so much for having me.
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: This has been such a pleasure.
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: All right loves.
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: All you need to know about Madeline is going to be in the show notes.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: Definitely click through and find her and I have no doubt we will talk more about human design in the future.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: Peace, Dear Divorce Diary is a podcast by my coach, Dawn.
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: You can find more at mycoachdawncom.