Latest / Twin Mom Life / A Twin Home Birth Story: Making Informed Decisions, Braving an Unmedicated Birth & Self-Advocacy

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A Twin Home Birth Story: Making Informed Decisions, Braving an Unmedicated Birth & Self-Advocacy · Twin Mom Life

• victoria: it's really cool when there's strangers who ask me about my birth experience because you know everyone wants to know about that which wins because it's very unique. and I get to share that I had my babies at home and I have noticed that people are like blown away that like we could actually birth our babies vaginally. And somehow it is possible, it's super wild to process that. but Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: It's just like so cool what we can do as moms. Jessielee Sittig: welcome to the Twin Mom Life podcast. I'm your host, Jess. I created this podcast to help build community, connection, and most importantly, friendships among moms of multiples. Being a twin mom can be amazing and magical. That twin bond is unlike anything I've ever witnessed, but it can also be isolating and overwhelming. I'll be chatting with other twin moms, diving deep into the twin experience. giving advice on what works for us so you don't have to learn the hard way. Juggling two babies at the same time is challenging, but I'm confident we can learn from each other and figure out how to raise these babies together. Jess Sittig: today we have Victoria. Welcome to the podcast. How are you doing today? victoria: Thank you. I'm doing really good. just so excited to be here. Jess Sittig: Yes, me too. So can you tell us a little bit about yourself? victoria: Yeah. Well, I have Modai twins. they are they're like 10 months, I think this week. And I've got a toddler, so three kiddos. I am in the Denver area, and last August I had them at home and ever since just been really passionate about Just sharing that moms have options when it comes to birth and just how to advocate for yourself and how to empower moms. Jess Sittig: Yeah, absolutely. I'm so excited to learn more about your home birth. Like I was telling you off air, we have interviewed people who have done unmedicated deliveries and vaginal deliveries, but everything that's been in the hospital. So I just am so fascinated by home births and your preparation for all of that. So I'm really excited to dive in. victoria: Yeah. Yeah, it's definitely on the rare side for sure. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Especially with twins. That's like the added layer of like this was not just like a singleton. Well, did you with your singleton also? victoria: Right. Yes. We were at a birth center. So kind of like a home birth, but super cozy, but not quite the same as home. Jess Sittig: Okay. That was like your your gateway drug. victoria: Yes. Yeah. Just wanted to try that out first. And I was over we were living in like Portland, Oregon at the time. There's this wonderful birth center that we had heard of. We had some family members who had given birth there and so that just felt like the right place for our first Jess Sittig: that's awesome. Sure. Yeah, I totally get that. Well, before we dive into it all, can you tell me how you filled your cup today or if you have plans to do so? victoria: That's so good. Well, today we just kind of took a Sabbath. It's funny, we didn't actually make it to church today and we just took it easy, slow morning, and my husband and I we just got our coffees and we read our Bible today. and it was a little bit, you know, s chaotic still, but he's like reading reading it out loud and you know, the kids are being loud and stuff, but we did our best to fill our cup and later we're gonna go on a walk. Jess Sittig: Hmm. Sweet. victoria: and we're gonna walk to the library. Yeah. Jess Sittig: that's so sweet. I love that. My kids have been super into going to our local library. We are they're doing like a summer reading program. So you fill out a sheet and then every time you read, you know, for a few hours you get prizes. So it's like a big thing in our house. So I love that. victoria: Yeah. That's amazing. How old are your kids? Jess Sittig: Okay, so my daughter is almost six and a half and my boys actually turn three tomorrow. victoria: Wow, okay. stop, that's so sweet. They're growing up. Aww. Jess Sittig: I know. I cannot I cannot believe that, honestly. Mm-hmm. victoria: Yeah. Do they have like reddish orange hair? They are so cute. I don't think I've seen their faces. Obviously, I think you sometimes will cover up their faces, but I'm just like I'm obsessed with like the orange hair. It's so cute. Jess Sittig: Yes. Mm-hmm. I will tell you, I feel like I get more comments about their hair color sometimes than like having twins. Because it's kind of a yeah. I feel like it's kind of more of a unique red. It's almost the boys have like a brighter red than my daughter. Like hers has kind of gotten more auburn, like with age. So I would kind of call their victoria: That's so funny. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Jess Sittig: They're they're red like an auburn. yeah, thank you. It's I no. No, I know genetics is wild, man. So my great grandmother had red hair and my husband's great grandfather had red hair, and then just like all of our children. victoria: Hmm. Does your husband have red hair? That's so funny. Yeah. Hmm. Okay. Hmm. There you go. Got it from them. I love it. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I know. It's really fun. And there's like no one else, no like cousins or siblings that have red hair in our family. It's just our kids. So victoria: It's so special. Jess Sittig: It's fun. It's really fun. But yes, like shocking. A lot of, like I said, more comments about that than twins, which is, I mean, you know, you have twins, you get a lot of comments. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. It's and I feel like maybe I feel like the comments kind of calm down as I get a little bit older. Like I think it's still very obvious that my twins are twins because they're still toddlers. They're the victoria: Mm, 'cause that's surprising. You do. It's like you're famous everywhere you go. Yeah. Jess Sittig: almost the exact same size and they are identical. But I feel like as kids get older, I don't know, maybe comments are less. I don't know. I feel like I got the most comments when I had like double strollers, two car seats, you know, like you had the whole, yeah, like the whole situation, I feel like is a little more obvious. victoria: Okay. Yes, yes. Mm-hmm. Very obvious. Yes. Mm-hmm. For sure. Jess Sittig: Okay, I'm thinking for me. So my husband and I just started doing the schedule and I love it. So on Saturdays he gets to sleep in. I'm air quoting that because victoria: Mm. I saw that. that's so amazing. I saw your Instagram today. Jess Sittig: It's so nice. And we yes, a I posted about it on Instagram because I feel like I feel like a big thing that I've learned through first of all, just being a mom for almost seven years and asking this question of like, how did you fill your cup today? It does not need to be this like extravagant thing. So I want to clarify like when I say we slept in, we each allow each other to have kind of a slow morning. victoria: Yeah. Jess Sittig: doing whatever you want to do free time without the kids only until 8 30. So it's not like, yeah, which is it doesn't seem like a lot. But you know, yes, I feel like our kids typically wake up around seven, seven thirty. So we're getting an hour to like drink our coffee slowly or do whatever we want for that hour, hour and a half. And it was just so rejuvenating. I did like victoria: Eight thirty. Okay. It it's a big when you have kids. Jess Sittig: little eye masks this morning. And see, that's what I mean about the your self-care doesn't have to be like, I had a spa day. No, like literally you can put on eye masks. Yes. And you can feel refreshed. So it was my morning today. And that was so nice. It was really nice. And we did, yeah, I really loved it. And we went to church. We've been going to a local church for like maybe six months. And my parents went with us today. victoria: Right. Simple. Yeah. Ooh. That's so lovely. Jess Sittig: So that felt really special. My mom normally works on Sundays and she did. She had to go to work after. But she was able to kind of rework her schedule to go to church with us. I feel like we've been talking about that for months. So it finally happened today. So yeah, just filling my cup and yeah, it was really special to do that. And my kids were so excited to have Mimi and Papa at church too. So, then since victoria: that's really special. Yeah. Jess Sittig: The boys turned three tomorrow. They moved up to the threes class. victoria: wow. That's exciting. Are you have plans for party or what does that look like for you guys? Jess Sittig: Yeah, and Okay, so we are doing a no-party year, which is just freeing. It's nice. So we had big parties last year. It was so fun. And now I need a little break. Yes. So we did the zoo yesterday with a couple of friends. And one thing maybe I wouldn't do next time is I brought cupcakes. They were, it was a disaster. I was like to all the moms, I was like, I'm so sorry. victoria: Yeah. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. I get it. I totally get it. Yep. Jess Sittig: I brought like at Costco I got, you know, Fourth of July red, white, and blue icing cupcakes that essentially melted. And the kids huh. I tried to freeze them and I just don't think it was enough. It was too hot. I live in central Texas. It was like ninety-five. So victoria: Yeah. I wondered about that, yeah. yeah. Hmm. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Those cupcakes are not gonna survive. Jess Sittig: Yes. But you know, so we did the zoo with two other families. We had so much fun. And one thing we did this year, and we'll we'll do again tomorrow on their actual birthday, but I saw someone post on Instagram actually about singing happy birthday twice so that each each of my sons gets like their own song. So in prior years we've just sang and like put their names in the song together. And this year I was like, they you you sing happy birthday. victoria: Yeah. Jess Sittig: For you know, 30 seconds, we absolutely need to make time for them to have their own song. And they loved it. It was so cute. It was so cute. So victoria: Mm. That's special. That's such a good idea. I definitely want to keep that in mind. To like make each kid feel special. Yeah. Jess Sittig: Yes. And it just was something little where maybe you'd think, like, what's the big deal of just like putting their names together? But I feel like, you know, me, I I'm almost 37. And when I tell my husband, I'm like, I don't need like a big grand birthday. I'm have everything I need. I'm happy. But one thing I always want on my birthday, like get me a little cupcake or a little cake and sing me happy birthday. Like that feel like that is the big thing that you do on your birthday and you blow out the candle. victoria: Yeah. Yeah. Jess Sittig: So for them to each have their own, we did not bring candles to the zoo. So but we'll do that tomorrow. But you know, they got to each have their own song and we got a video of it and just watching each of them like get that little attention and like that focus, it was so sweet. So victoria: gosh, yeah. Yes. I love that so much. Jess Sittig: Yeah. So it's I feel like kind of emotional about it. I feel like like that transition from two to three feels, I mean, they're still, they will always be my babies. But it just feels like a a little bit of a bigger transition of like right now they they still are in cribs. Of course they still have car seats, but I feel like we're slowly gonna be phasing out of all of that. Like they don't really use their high chairs anymore. So it's like all these things that make them victoria: Yeah. Always, yeah. Right, yeah. Mm, mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: like more infants, they're kind of growing out of. So it bittersweet. victoria: Yeah. Ugh. That's so so special just seeing them grow up from that infant stage to you know, tall still toddlers, but that's a big deal. She's two and a half. Jess Sittig: And how old is your toddler? Okay. Hmm. victoria: Yeah, so she's not three yet. But we had her birthday just recently because her birthday is right before Christmas. So we had a birthday party and I was just telling my husband, I don't think the boys are gonna have their birthday, their first birthday, just because they're not gonna remember and it'd be too much. So I think I'm gonna wait till they're two where they're actually going to be you know, involved into in it, you know. so I get you on the whole birthday thing, it's a lot. Like I had to recover for two weeks of like I don't wanna see anybody for two weeks. Because yeah. Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: Get that. Yes. And it's just like everything that comes with it. Like I I would say I'm pretty extroverted, but I feel like as I'm getting older and now that I've had more kids, I really do need like downtime, alone time to kind of feel centered again. But it's like all of the planning and the decor and it kind of sometimes can get out of hand. So it you know what I mean? So it's been nice to just like I I think our plan is to do every other year. victoria: Nice. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Hmm. Yeah. Jess Sittig: So we did similar with our, so our daughter was a COVID baby. So we did not have a big first birthday party. We had a big second one. And then that just kind of became the tradition in our family. So the boys didn't have a first birthday party. We just we went to the zoo, actually. That's kind of become a tradition. And then we had a big party for their second birthday party, which was last year. So yeah, so we'll go big for seven and four next year. victoria: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah. I will probably do the same thing. I love that idea. Jess Sittig: It's nice and it just takes the pressure off. And I feel like in our family, we've really been trying to gravitate towards like doing activities together versus a big party. And you actually what we let our daughter do is we she's just graduated kindergarten. So she's gonna be in first grade in August, which is also so weird. but we allowed her to have three friends over and do like a pizza movie night. So she still got, yeah. And it felt like very low pressure, super. victoria: Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Jess Sittig: Like casual, you know, and she had a blast. I was actually shocked by how loud four six year olds were. victoria: Yeah. that's such a fun age. Jess Sittig: Yeah, it really is. So okay. Well, I would love to hear about your twin birth and like how you made the decision to do a home birth and and all of that. So can you tell us about that? victoria: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah, absolutely. Well, I went back to the birth center to we knew that we were not gonna be there because we were moving at the time, but we just wanted to see those midwives again and just get care there until we moved from Oregon to Colorado. And so they don't do like ultrasounds, the midwives, they will do like Doppler, so they have someone come in and do bring in their ultrasound equipment. And so I got an ultrasound there and the the tech is like really quiet. And I'm like, is everything okay? Because it was making me nervous. I am very sensitive to people's anxiety, or I could feel that something was off. And he said, or so I asked him, is that the little one in there? And he said, There are two little ones. And I was like, what? It had never crossed my mind that I would ever have twins, even though it does run in the family, apparently. but it just I never considered it, which is so funny. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: And in that moment he he probably overstepped a little bit just because he's not like a a doctor. But he said that, you know, you're having Modai twins, that's high risk, and you're probably gonna need a C-section just because, you know, the issues that could come up with Modi twins, which is two sacks and one placina. And that you would need to go to maternal fetal medicine doctors every two weeks. And so that was kind of overwhelming. Like the first five minutes of like finding out I was having twins. Yeah, it was it was definitely pretty shock shocking for me. And I definitely cried a little bit. Cause just cause I was overwhelmed. Jess Sittig: I'm so shocked he said that. victoria: And I hadn't experienced care just with OBs before. so that was just also new. So I needed to find like a little bit of care in Oregon before moving. So we went, I wanna say like twice to maternal fetal medicine in Oregon. And I just didn't experience the best care. I was asked if I wanted to like keep my twins, if I wanted to be pregnant. And I know that that's like more common now, like even if you have like a singleton where they might ask you that. but it just was sad to to be asked that when I, you know, wasn't desiring that. And just the way they viewed twin pregnancies was just felt like there was some sort of condition without knowing if I had a condition. and so definitely felt viewed as Jess Sittig: Hm. victoria: disabled or something or twins in that not that they are or are not, but just that they already had that kind of mindset, assuming that I wouldn't want twins. Yeah. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. That's so hard. And it's, I feel like this has been like a theme that's come up in the podcast too, is like having twins is so hard. That does not mean that it's not a blessing. Like it is the greatest thing that I've experienced in my life, alongside, you know, being the mother to my daughter. So I'm so sorry that you were so immediately hit with so much negativity around your pregnancy. Especially it's like victoria: Yeah. Jess Sittig: Finding out your twins is already so shocking. Like you need to just digest that part before you can start thinking about, yeah, like I'm thinking back to mine and our we were so I have die twins who are identical. So they have their own sex, their own placentas, but they're identical. So I was told they were fraternal. It's pretty neat, which is which is wrong. They're not fraternal. but I wasn't hit with like that negativity. victoria: It is. Yeah, that's cool. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: I feel like once I talked to my doctor, she was kind of just very factual. One of the sacks was smaller, so she had mentioned vanishing twin syndrome. And but I feel like it was much more factual. And I also was high risk with my daughter. I have a blood clotting disorder, so I did see maternal fetal medicine with my daughter. So I guess all of that wasn't as shocking to me, but I feel like victoria: Right. Totally. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: Getting hit with so much negativity, like you said in the first five minutes, that's a lot. And I'm just really sorry. victoria: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for just sharing that. And yeah, I completely understand where it's like you have a medical condition, you need extra support. That is very needed. And we need that. just for different emergencies and stuff. and it's just like I noticed that all twin moms are put in this like high risk category and and there's like no room for individualized care. That's what I noticed. where it's like there's different brackets. Like I believe that Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: You said die-dye twins, is that what you have? from their perspective. And mine's like medium. And then there's like Momo twins, which is what was it one sack and one placina? Yeah. Is that what you know of? Yeah. Yeah. And just that each of those they must be induced or like a scheduled section. Like for mine, it's like 37 weeks. That's like very strongly recommended. And was yours like 39 weeks? Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. So the goal was to make it to 38. And actually, because I have a blood clotting disorder, even with my daughter, I didn't go past 38 weeks because I'm at increased risk for stillbirth. So even with just a singleton, that was, I don't know, a rule or whatever with what I have. but once I found out it was twins, I agree with you. I feel like I was very lucky to initially have a provider who was on the same page as me. Because once I found out it was twins, I was like, victoria: Okay. Got it. Okay. Totally. Yeah. Gotcha. Yep. Jess Sittig: if I don't medically need a C-section, I don't want one. I had had a vaginal delivery with my daughter. It was overall a fairly good experience. And, you know, a C-section is not the easy way out. It is a full abdominal surgery. And that is not something that I was very afraid to find to find a doctor who was like, twins equal C-section. victoria: Yeah, yeah, yeah. No. Yeah. Yeah. Jess Sittig: And I was telling my husband, like, if that's what our doctor says, then we will find another doctor. Cause I found out pretty early. I think I was six weeks that we found out it was twins. so I just got very lucky. Sorry, my daughter's outside and she just waved at me through the window. I'm like, hi. victoria: That's great. Yeah. cute. Jess Sittig: Sorry, but but yeah, so how did you move providers or what did you do to of get out of that box that you were put in, that like high risk box? victoria: you're good. For sure. Yeah. And so we moved to Colorado. I was looking for an OB who had skills in breach and who wouldn't automatically do C section. And so There were two doctors in Colorado who I knew of, and this there was this man who everyone just wants to go to because he's like super supportive, kind of more hands-off doctor. And he was actually booked out. And I feel like that was actually a closed door so that I could actually find my midwife. and so I was with this OB for a short time. You know, she was really great and definitely leaned a little bit more as close as you could get to like a Jess Sittig: Hm. Mm. victoria: Midwife and like I said, just had some skills. But the thing is, is that she might have not been on the day that I was giving birth. So she had like another person who's very high C-section. And so that made me a little bit nervous. And I didn't know this until I toured the hospital. But you obviously know this, that Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: Towards the end of labor, if you're wanting a vaginal birth, you still need to go in the OR. And I guess that was like shocking for me. And I like questioned the nurse. I said, you know, if everything's great, there's no complications, you know, why do I need to move rooms? And Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: I just kind of asked her some questions and she just said we strongly recommend that. And so after that, I really was on the lookout for another provider. and not to say that like, okay, there are emergencies and I think it's so important to say that and to have that care. And so I'm not like poo-pooing hospitals in any way. I was just questioning, like, you know, if everything is going right and you have a healthy pregnancy and your baby's doing okay, I just maybe don't feel the need for that. Like I feel like it increases the risk for a C section just moving into the OR. But I understand just the precaution of doing that. And so Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. victoria: My husband actually saw this like twin home birth blog in the mountains of Colorado. And that was just kind of the start. And it wasn't until we moved to Colorado my friend who lives who lived there also saw the same blog. So she reached out to the photographer. And I was able to get the midwife's number. And I find out, I know, just so much, yeah, so much like weight lifted off of me. And so she called me after I emailed her and just heard that she's a very skilled midwife, has worked with many twins, has gotten training from Dr. Stu. he trains midwives, or really anyone he trains. Jess Sittig: I love that connection. victoria: Trains OBs, he trains maternal fetal medicine. If they're, you know, open to doing that. He's told me that he's trained all kinds of people. doula's how to do breach, and then just different things about twins and what their needs could be, and how he did a study on a hundred moms who were planning a home birth, and he broke down like who was transferred, who had a C section, who ended up having a home birth, who was breached. And so that's like a really great study I would share with people who are desiring a home birth or just like a vaginal breach birth, if you're interested in that sort of thing. yeah, I will send that to you. Yeah. Jess Sittig: I can totally link that in the show notes. That's awesome. Thanks. victoria: And so It was probably like 18, 16 to 18 weeks was when I transferred. And she has her own ultrasound equipment. She had training, like the full ultrasound thing. the only thing that she needed was anatomy scan just because they really go in depth. And she just wanted their skills to to see some of those things. And so I just had one more appointment with maternal fetal medicine. I had canceled all appointments with my OB of just like I need my records and yeah so when I went to my last appointment at maternal food and medicine I had three different people corner me trying to convince me to tell them who my provider was. And I it was I don't I have no idea. And it was really strange and I just said, you know I just want my records Jess Sittig: Why does that matter? victoria: And so I just kept getting cornered and finally like the doctor came in and I was just like, I know all the risks. I just need my records, okay? And so thankfully I was able to get out of there. And it was really like I felt like the birth police came after me and I was in trouble. Yeah. So I definitely questioned myself, like, am I doing something wrong? Like these people, you know, are the experts. And I definitely, you know, had moments of doubt of like, am I doing the right thing? And I, you know Planning out this home birth with my midwife, we had a plan for a hospital transfer that the OB that I originally wanted, he was gonna be the backup person of like, if we need a transfer, we're gonna transfer to him because he's not going to treat me bad if I had a home birth and I was like transferred. Jess Sittig: Mm. is so sad that you even had to think about that, of like how you would be treated because you chose to give birth in a non hospital setting. victoria: Yeah. Yeah. And also they called my OB that I had canceled with. And so when these people are talking to me, I look at my phone and my OB's calling me as like the fourth person trying to like come at me. And she and I later called her back just because, you know, I don't know why I did, but anyway, she asked me let's see, she said Are you gonna have a hospital birth? And I said, you know, I don't need to tell you what I'm gonna do. And she said, Well, I just wanna make sure Evelyn will be able to enjoy her brothers. So she pulled, she pulled the dead baby card. Jess Sittig: No she did not. that's so icky. That's so I don't even know what to say. I can't believe she said that. victoria: It is, yeah. And Yeah, and like they don't ev they didn't even know that I was planning a home birth. Jess Sittig: my gosh, what did you say back to that? victoria: Yeah. I just said, you know, I'm taken care of. I've got really good care. Jess Sittig: Well, you are nicer than me. victoria: I just recently shared how like I had been wanting to send her a postcard and I actually have it on and yeah, so I I I created a post and then I had a bunch of people like comment, say send the postcard and I have it in my like to-do list to do that. Of like, you know, here are my babies, they're healthy and well. Jess Sittig: Right. Yeah. man, that's so unbelievably icky for her to say that. And you handled that very gracefully. victoria: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, it was definitely like not easy. And so when I transferred to my midwife, I felt this like breath of fresh air, this peace. and just definitely like more intentional care of like with my OB, just about five minutes, I got to sit down with them and then with my midwife an hour at least. Sometimes we'd have a lot of fun and be like two hours. And so definitely like different care that had. And so it was thirty-eight weeks when I actually went into labor. I didn't know if it was the real thing because I was having contractions like a week before. And so Jess Sittig: Mm, I'm sorry. victoria: I know, it was just awful. I was ready to have my babies. So definitely like confusing. So when I actually like went into labor, I was like telling myself, like, this is probably not the real thing, just to kind of take the pressure off. Jess Sittig: Sure. I have my big mason jar too. Cheers! victoria: yes. Yay! I have three drinks. I think I told you this. I've got my coffee, my like just regular ice water, and then electrolytes. Yes. Jess Sittig: Nice. I love that. I I normally do have two like coffee. I just have electrolytes today. victoria: Perfect. What flavor? Jess Sittig: It it is the iced tea lemonade. It's so good. It's so refreshing. It's delicious. Mm-hmm. And so good. victoria: Ooh, lemonade is like my favorite electrolytes. It's just the best flavor. Anyway, I didn't think it was the real thing. So around like eight PM that night, just started having contractions and definitely could tell it was slowly getting more frequent, more intense, but still was kind of far apart. And so just throughout the night was doing different things like taking a bath and doing different like pregnancy stretches to get in the right position and trying to like rest and lay down and go to sleep. And I couldn't go to sleep. My husband decided to go to sleep because he was like, okay, she's starting to go into labor. I need to get some rest. Thinking that I would like go actually into labor the next day. so I'm glad he was able to get some rest. And so my toddler, we are like still co-sleeping. And so she's in bed while I am still in the room, like laboring, and I cannot focus. I'm afraid she's gonna wake up. My brain is like, mom, but then I need to labor. And so it was like gosh, three in the morning. I was like told Stephen I need you to start the birth tub and then I need your dad to come pick up Evelyn because I really need to focus. Jess Sittig: That's what I wanted to ask you. I'm like, I have so many logistical questions. victoria: Yes. Go for it. I love it. Jess Sittig: Okay, so the plan was to deliver like in a home birthing tub. victoria: Mm-hmm. that I wasn't sure if I was gonna do that. I knew I wanted to labor, but I I had a feeling that I actually would labor out or give birth actually outside of the tub. but I the being in the tub takes so much relief off Jess Sittig: Okay. Mm. victoria: Of all the pressure and the contractions, it's it's really helpful for any intensity of labor. Jess Sittig: Yeah, I bet. And then so for that, like you didn't have it set up ahead of time. The plan is like to to set it up while labor is starting. That's what I'm like, where do you put that? You just have like a big labor tub in your bathroom or something. victoria: I know, right. Right. Yes. So my midwife like brought the tub at like thirty-six weeks of and like showed us how to do it and like made sure we had like a adapter that's connected to the shower and the hose. So just preparing all the home birth stuff. I did it like thirty-two weeks because I'm like have to be prepared. So you never know. Yes. Jess Sittig: With twins you never know, really, you know, so victoria: And thirty-six weeks was like the cutoff. Like if it was earlier, we would be in the hospital. So, but we were that's that was kind of the goal. And so we actually were in an apartment at the time, so very small. So some people might like set it up, you know. Jess Sittig: Yeah, sure. victoria: If they have like a big space days before. Like you just never know when you're gonna be in labor. But I was like pretty into labor where I was like, okay, it's three in the morning. I need you to set this up for me. Cause the actual tub was getting like, it's just not big enough. The what you know, our our tubs. Yes, yes. Mm-hmm. So I Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Well, the way you wanna like move around and you know, yeah. Yeah, I get that. victoria: So I was like calling my midwife probably five times throughout the night, letting her know my contractions are like far apart, but like this feels like the real thing. And I was really struggling with like when do I have them come? I was really struggling with that. And I was like going into this like people pleasing of I don't want all three midwives to come and then I'm not in labor, or it's like too early labor. Jess Sittig: Hm. victoria: But then finally at five o'clock, I'm like, you know what? I need to get over myself. Just come and we'll see where I'm at. And it's okay if they have to leave. And if it's not the real thing. So she comes, everyone comes at six o'clock, six a.m. And some people, when it comes to birth, they don't want a cervical check. In that moment, I felt the need because something was off in my body. Something didn't feel right. Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: And I know that cervical checks can really disappoint moms where they're like, I think I'm this, but I'm only two centimeters. So I decided to get a cervical check and find out I am one centimeter and I feel pretty much in active labor at this point. I am really confused. And so my midwife, she's like, you know what? I'm noticing that there's scar tissue that you have. And I, with my past birth, I Did have some scar tissue. I had a tear. And after being giving birth to my daughter, the tear seemed to be a little bit deeper than what my midwife back in Oregon felt comfortable, like, you know, sewing up. And so she said, a couple hours, you know, after birth, let's just go to this nearby hospital. And so, Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: That was hard, like leaving my daughter a couple hours after birth. My husband stayed at the birth center and they said that it was they wanted to go to the OR and do it. And so it was like a little bit more intense. And so there was things that were sewed up that shouldn't have been sewed up and then scar tissue from the tear. And so Jess Sittig: Mm. victoria: Anyway, my midwife asked me if I if she could like release it, kinda move it out of the way for for my body to dilate and I like totally fine with that. And my body went to nine centimeters and I felt that. I was like nine centimeters, like there's no way I'm one centimeter. Jess Sittig: for sure. I mean, if you're saying fill the tub and our daughter needs to be under someone else's care, then like you know it's go time. Like you've given birth before, you know the differences. That is insane. So what time frame did you go from a one to a nine? victoria: Just after she had pushed it out of the way, like my body was at, we think that I was at a nine, and it just there was something blocking me from dilating. And that's probably why my contractions were so weird and so far apart. But they were like definitely getting more intense. So immediately like after that, anyway, she was just like shocked, like, you are nine centimeters right now. Yeah. Jess Sittig: Wow. Like you were at a nine. Sure. Mm-hmm. I bet, that's wild. victoria: Yeah, she hadn't really s experienced that a whole lot. But I'm so grateful that she saw that because I probably would have been if I was like in the hospital, I probably would have been laboring for a long time, not progressing. And you know, if I don't progress, that's probably gonna lead to being induced. But then what's actually happening is I'm just not dilating. So I could have probably had like a C section just because the issue was like the scar tissue in the way. So grateful that she saw that. And so then I went to the tub immediately and just yeah, very intense. Definitely needed that relief. And so they were there from 6 a.m. I had the boys at 9 30 that morning. So just kind of sharing that and then I'm gonna kind of walk you through just what I can remember. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. victoria: There was a point where I was feeling stuck. And usually when moms are feeling stuck in labor, that means you're probably gonna meet your baby soon where you're like, this is so hard. Like, you know, we usually say, I'm done, like I can't do this anymore. Most of us get to that point. And so I was like, you know what, I'm feeling really stuck. I really wanna push, but I'm not feeling the urge to push. And I'm just really ready to move forward. It's time. Go time. And so I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna just go in the other room with Steven and we're gonna get some alone time. And I want that oxytocin because I know when I feel relaxed and safe, our bodies listen and our bodies dilate, and the baby is the baby feels safe if we feel safe. and so I spent some time with him just snuggling and cuddling, and just his encouragement, and so. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: After we left the room, came back into the tub, and I was just like like just in a happy happy mood and felt all the oxytocin, the love, the love feelings. And so very soon after, probably like twenty minutes, I I don't know the exact time, but very soon after, I started feeling pressure in my butt and started feeling the urge to push. I felt the urge to bear down. And I just said that out loud. And I probably just should have kept that to myself because it gets everybody excited, you know. So I probably should have just like been in the zone. So I am starting to feel the urge to push. I was using this like squeezy thing. It's it's not a comb, but similar to a comb where it's like specific like Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Mm. victoria: each time a contraction hit 'cause I've got no medication. It's just me with all the feelings. And so, you know, it's pretty intense at this point. I'm this is the most intense part where you know, my contractions were not like I would not say the word painful, but very uncomfortable and like Now it's like this pressure on my butt. I feel like there's a boiling ball in my butt. It's very uncomfortable. I don't like that feeling. And so I'm still using this squeezing thing, but it's not helping because I'm putting all my pressure in my hand and I need to bear down. And so it was like I had to like tell myself to bear down and to stop focusing in like my hand. So that took me a little bit. And baby A is crowning I don't know if we find out then or later that his forehead is presenting. And so I'm having a little bit of trouble. Jess Sittig: Mm. Does that mean sunny side up? victoria: I had that with my daughter, but I think it's just like instead of it just being straight down, his forehead is sticking out a little bit. So it's you kinda down, down, yes, exactly. So more like this instead of down. Yeah. So it just took a little bit to get him out. Definitely you know, roaring and moving like a cow. Jess Sittig: Okay. Instead of it being like down. Okay. victoria: because that's what I felt like my body was like telling me to do. It's something about just like focusing downward really helps. And it looks like I am just in terrible pain and very I'm very uncomfortable. But I just was like, this is what my body's telling me to do. And so just kind of like roaring my baby out. And everyone's different in how they do that, you know. And so finally baby A comes out. And it's just so special. Steven catches baby A, puts him on my chest, and then my midwife just checks to see where baby B's at. And baby B's head is not there, but his water bag's there. Like you don't see his head right there, it's just like the water bag. And so she does this maneuver on my belly. So Jess Sittig: Mm. victoria: Before I had my birth, I said, you know, you're welcome to do more hands on things. if it's like a non emergency, you're welcome to do that. Just so we can avoid a transfer if it's like not a huge deal, like just like getting the cervical checked and and and moving that tissue out the scar tissue out of the way. I was okay with her doing those things. Just because I knew that I probably would, you know, just a little bit extra care and support in that area. And so anyway, she just pushed on my belly. It didn't hurt. I didn't even notice it. And I had a contraction and I pushed baby B out, and I had like the fetal ejection reflex, which I had never experienced before. Are you familiar with that? Okay, so it's when. Jess Sittig: No, what is that? victoria: Your body takes over and pushes your baby out where you don't actually put a ton of effort into it. It's just like your baby hits a spot where it just literally ejects out of you, which is ins I know, right? I that is a thing. And I had never experienced that before. and I had to very much like intentionally push and bear down. Jess Sittig: Sounds great. victoria: with my others and I had done a little bit of like research about that and wondered about that. And with the other two, just the babies were in weird positions. So it just didn't work out. And I think my midwife may have just like helped put him in the right position for him to just come right out. And yeah, just had one contraction and he was right out. And so they were about four minutes apart. Jess Sittig: Gosh, that's amazing. victoria: Yeah, it was just so special. And Placina came out real soon as well. like I said, I had my midwife we had talked about before. She said, Would you wanna wait to do like the pitocin afterwards, or do you want to just do it just in case? Because with twins you do have a higher risk of bleeding. Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: And you know, usually I would be like, you know, no, but because just with twins, I just really wanted there not to be any issues. So just like I just said, go ahead and give me Pitocin so we can get the placenta out so we'll have no issues. So we went ahead and did that. Midwives are cool. They carry a lot of different stuff. They carry like Pitocin and and a lot of the medical things that, you know, hospitals might have as well. so that was like super helpful. And like after that, just had a very minor tear and she stitched me up and I went to my bed and just relaxed for a little bit and soon cut the cord. we just like waited for the cord to like stop pulsing and just kind of did some research there on like delayed cord clamping and just some of those benefits and yeah, so that was special. And then after that, my husband like weighed the boys and we just chilled. We just had we took a nap, all of us. Yeah. And my in laws came a couple hours later for our toddler to see the boys. So we had some special time, just the four of us, I guess. Yeah, four of us. Yeah. Jess Sittig: That's incredible. What an amazing story. And I'm so glad that everything it just like everything turned out the way that it was supposed to be. You know? That's a really special story. Okay. One question I always like to ask with vaginal deliveries is: like, what did you do with baby A? Like, was he put on your chest? And then when you were pushing out baby B, like, what did you do? victoria: Yeah. Yeah. For sure. So baby A was immediately on my chest. And then I believe I gave baby A to my husband right right next to me. And I don't think I told you, but yeah, so I didn't give birth in the birth tub. I was like right outside of it and I was doing all these different positions because I just was trying to figure out which one was right for me. And I ended up giving birth like sideways. So they brought a pillow from my bedroom so I could just like lay there because I didn't want to get up because, you know, still have to push out baby B. So gave I just remember pictures of like giving looking back at pictures, giving baby A to my husband. And then you know, baby B just like came out very quickly. and just we both laid there with our babies and just got stitched up right there. And then we just went over to to my bed, but definitely was like, so hard trying to get up after you give birth. Definitely needed some help though. Jess Sittig: Just love though that you were able to go straight to your bed. So I will say with my daughter, when we were in the hospital, we were afraid to leave. We were like, my gosh, all the nurses are helping us, like, please help us. With the boys, we like wanted to leave so bad. We wanted to get back home to our daughter. And, you know, with twins, first of all, we couldn't all lay in the bed together. It's a hospital bed. So there was no like canoodling the four of us, you know. And then with twins, and I was technically victoria: Yeah. Yeah. It's the best. Yeah. Mm-hmm. right. Right, yeah. Jess Sittig: Technically a patient also, our room was being disturbed. I mean, every 30 minutes. It was like someone coming in to check on the babies. And my boys didn't have NICU time, but there was still so much like intervention and checks and and you know, all of that. I I was grateful that they were making sure that everyone was like safe, but I was so tired. I was like, I just need to. I remember when we left, my husband was like, victoria: Yeah. Right. Mm, that's great. Yeah. Coming in. Right. Jess Sittig: I actually don't feel like I can safely drive the four of us home. Like I I can't. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I mean sleeping on like a chair for I think we were in the hospital for five nights. So victoria: Yeah, yeah. 'Cause he, you know, was there and he's tired too. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I mean I'm sure you didn't get the best sleep sleeping on a chair. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. So I love that. I mean, that is a huge benefit of a home birth is that you are in your safe space and then you get to just be home. That's incredible. And just what an amazing story. And I know that you were talking about tips for like an unmedicated labor. victoria: Yeah. For sure. Jess Sittig: And can you talk more about that? I've I've heard about I know that you didn't necessarily use a comb, but you had something similar. I've heard of that, like managing pain in that way. And what are other tips that you use to have an unmedicated birth? Cause you also had an unmedicated birth with your daughter just in a birth center, right? victoria: For sure. Yeah, I would say a couple things for just helping with the intensity of labor, being in the water. There's something so powerful about being in the water when you're laboring. I don't know what it is, but it really like reduces like the pain intensity of it. and just practicing breathing before you give birth. So it's like natural. A couple things that people do, they might do wall sits and breathe. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: through it because it's like you know a full body workout. Some people do like this ice holding ice for a minute and breathing through that. so it's just really about practicing breathing through it. Jess Sittig: Hmm. Mm. victoria: asking yourself, you know, why do I want an unmedicated birth? Because we're gonna get to a point in the birth where it's gonna be so intense that we're not gonna want an unmedicated birth. Or we get to that transition moment. So what are you gonna do during that moment? Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: You know, maybe having your partner speak life over you, encouraging you. that is very helpful. Getting the oxytocin from what makes you feel safe. So that could be just like dim lights, special music that you love, like a playlist. Really trying not to be interrupted. And so if most people are gonna give birth in a hospital, like 98% of moms are, and so some tips that I would share if you're wanting like an unmedicated birth in the hospital for twins, is laboring at home as long as possible, as long as you don't have a medical condition. That usually can be very helpful. Is laboring as long as possible, of like where you get to that point where you can't talk, where you can't talk through contractions, where it's like, okay, I am in active labor. might be good to go to the hospital now. So when you are leaving your house, that can be a little bit of a disruption. So maybe wearing like sunglasses. I know that's so weird. If it's like in the middle of the day, or yeah, even at night, because all the bright lights of like Jess Sittig: Mm. victoria: going in the hospital. It's like super bright lights. and so maybe having like headphones on so you're not disturbed. So that's one thing, laboring as long as possible if you are gonna be going to the hospital. The second thing would be if there's no emergency, if everything's okay, avoiding the IV at the beginning, just so that you can like move around and there's not like a bunch of stuff attached to you where it's hard to like move around. That can be helpful if you're comfortable with that, or like getting just the beginning piece of like the IV in where you know not yes and not having it connected to anything in the moment if that's what you desire. And I have a few other things. limiting cervical checks Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. And then having it like plugged. victoria: at the beginning because that's kind of what like a disruption and it's usually like a disappointment because you could go like I said you could go from one to nine centimeters real quick or like five to nine centimeters. And so I always find it disappointing and it can mess with you mentally. And sometimes when you are in like triage, they really want that to kind of see where you're at. You could always say you can just check me physically of like if I'm not talking. Like I'm obviously deep in labor, if if you don't want a cervical check. Sometimes cervical checks are helpful, like in my situation. Jess Sittig: Hm. victoria: And the other thing is if you have no medical problems, if baby's doing okay, intermittent monitoring instead of continuous monitoring so you can move around a little bit more. And so every couple contractions, my midwife would check on the baby's heart rate. That's like waterproof, like Doppler. So it's not like they weren't checking on the baby or anything. They were I I guess that was intermittent monitoring. And then like when it was getting more intense, they would check like every other contraction. And so that can be really helpful for like hospital birth and like home birth. Yeah, any of those things using something to squeeze that can really help just during those contractions. but also When we are feeling tight and our jaw is tight. And we're tightening up every contraction. Our body receives it as like fear and like something's wrong. And so that can really make those contractions even more painful. And so, like, really like dropping your jaw, dropping your shoulders. I remember a moment I'm just like this on the toilet, because sometimes sitting on the toilet backwards can like help you dilate, but I'm like really tight and tense. And my midwife is like, okay, let's relax our shoulders. Let's relax. relax our jaw. And so really it's it's hard to do, but just really trying to relax your body just with each contraction. Jess Sittig: Yeah. victoria: instead of like screaming high high pitched tones, that really is not helpful because it makes you feel unsafe and you're really tight. And so like really low moaning, like a cow, moving like a cow. even roaring is like okay too, because it it can be kind of like deep, deeper. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: where it's like you're going downward. Yeah, so avoiding those like really high pitch like screaming if possible. I know that can be hard when it's like really intense, you know. But it is possible to have a unmedicated birth and with twins. It's not y always easy. You know, birth in general is not easy. Jess Sittig: Love that though. And I feel like one thing that stuck out to me with in your story was when you said that you were feeling stuck. So that you wanted to kind of like take a break and go have some one-on-one time with your husband and just like snuggle and like hug. And you know, I that's your safe space. So of course that's gonna make you relax. And that was so that really stuck out to me. Like I think that's something that people just overlook and it's You know, actually something so simple to do to like hug your person. sounded like that's what kind of like shifted in your story. Was like, wow, something that you think is so little that was really impactful. And I wish that I would have done that. I was so tense in labor, especially with my daughter. I was trying to breathe through the contractions. victoria: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Hard. Jess Sittig: And I I didn't have I didn't do the practice that you talked about. And I think all the tips that you gave with like breathing through things like holding ice and doing wall sits and having those things to practice so that when you are actually in the moment of more intensity and being uncomfortable and having that pain, that you actually know how to breathe through and handle it. So I think those tips are really helpful. And victoria: Yeah. Jess Sittig: I know we also talked offline about, you know, some things in pregnancy and birth are out of our control, but there are some things that we can do to positively impact our pregnancy and birth. And what are some of those like tips that you would give to mamas? victoria: Yeah, I love that you mentioned that where it's like We can't control birth and the birth outcome, but we can set a foundation for like the health for ourselves and our for our baby. And what I noticed with compared to my singleton to my twins or just that pregnancy was I was like really inflamed, I would say, with my singleton compared to my twins, which is so wild to me. I obviously was still like Jess Sittig: Mm. victoria: I gained weight, of course, like we all do, but noticed I was not swollen as much. And a couple things that I was encouraged to do, my midwife in Oregon said, with twins, there's this like diet, it's called the Brewer's Diet. And there was this OB in the 60s that Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: believed that maybe there was a connection with moms who didn't eat enough protein, didn't eat enough minerals and salt. that could be connected to precleampsia. And with twins, you do have a higher risk of precleampsia. And I was told that by a couple people, by my midwife, by the high risk doctors, and usually they the high risk doctors or just, you know, OBs in general might recommend like Aspirin low dose aspirin, which could be helpful. anyway, I ended up just focusing on my diet. So kind of crazy, but I that diet encourages you to eat 150 grams of protein daily. I did not always reach that. It was usually between like 130 and 150. And so yeah, it definitely was like yeah Jess Sittig: Wow. It's still great and hard. victoria: Definitely had to kind of like plan out the meals. And so not saying that that's going to completely reduce preclampsia, but it might help potentially. And so I did notice kind of a difference there. So just yeah, high protein, lots of minerals, lots of electrolytes, Jess Sittig: So, you know what's interesting is towards the end, so my the goal was for me to make it to 38 weeks. And then I think at like my 36 week scan, the boys just were not growing. They had interuterine growth restriction. victoria: Okay. Okay. Jess Sittig: And maybe that was even earlier, maybe at like thirty five weeks, they started to be like, they're really not growing. So I asked my high risk doctor, okay, what ca is there anything I can do about that? And she said, eat more protein. victoria: Yeah. Wow, I love that. Yes, come on. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. So I I I wish that I would have. I mean, it was so hard in my early pregnancy. I don't know if you had this too. I had severe nausea. I was throwing up constantly. I remember my daughter would narrate it. Like I'd be making her lunch, like, wow. And she was like, that was a big one, mom. I'm like, I'm so glad I have an audience right now. I just was so sick. And it did subside, which I'm so thankful for. victoria: Yeah. my goodness. Yeah. Jess Sittig: But I wish I would have gotten that advice earlier so that I could have maybe I don't know if I could have fully prevented the growth restriction, but if I could have done something to help earlier on, I know I wasn't eating enough protein because I probably wasn't eating enough in general, especially those first like sixteen weeks. I I could barely keep down toast. I mean it was victoria: Right. That's so hard. Like what do you even do in that situation when you can't even like keep down toast? Jess Sittig: I did an episode recently with Allegra from Aloha Nutrition. my gosh, she has so many great tips and she's super big on everything you're talking about: high protein, minerals, electrolytes. And she had great tips for nausea. I'm like, I wish that I would have like had this conversation with you years ago. victoria: yeah. Mm-hmm. love it. love that. Cats. Jess Sittig: And she was just saying there are so many high protein carbohydrate options nowadays. Like if you only want pancakes, we'll look into high protein there, you know, Kodiak brand, or there are so many. I'm like, yes. Yeah. So I'm like, that's shit, a lot of good tips like that. So but again, I'm like, I didn't have those tools, you know, four years ago. So victoria: Mm-hmm. Yes, yes. Yes. Yes. Where you can just add in the ingredients, kind of like hide it a little bit. Yes. Jess Sittig: But you you live and you learn. So if you're listening, eat more protein. victoria: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. It really does help with like just so we have so much more blood that we need for ourselves and for the baby. our bodies just need so much more protein to to carry our little ones. I was also just gonna share this herb that I used. Dandelion root. So I, you know, there's probably no research on it. I haven't looked, but a lot of moms swear by it where it's for your liver and it's supposed to just Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: without being super intense, but just naturally help your liver do its thing. And your liver could be maybe connected to the swelling and and so if your liver's working properly it could help reduce swelling. So I would I used that and noticed a big difference. I don't know if it was s specifically because of taking dandelion like root tincture. I could not take the tea every day. That was too much work. But taking a little tincture every day, that's what I did. Jess Sittig: I feel like anything like that is helpful. And I think Allegra, this is a little bit different. It wasn't talking about like swelling and liver function per se. It was more like blood flow, which obviously, like I have like some blood clotting issues, you know, I have a genetic disorder. And she was talking about beetroot. And there actually are studies. I think they're only in mice, but there's still like something showing that it's can improve. victoria: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Blood flow, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Jess Sittig: like blood flow and oxygenation and you know, but I'm like, cool. Yes. So I'm like, again, I not that I would have not taken the Lovinox, but I would have added beetroot to I'm like, man, I just have l I just learned every time I talk to someone, I feel like I learned so much. So again, I have learned so much from you also. And I just wish we would had this conversation a long time ago. victoria: Wow, super cool. Bitro. Dang. for sure, yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. I know me too. I hadn't heard of the dandelion route. or maybe I did. I just didn't take it. And I was like I remember my ring. I couldn't wear it. And I was able to wear my ring, I'm pretty sure like throughout the entire pregnancy with my twins. I don't remember switching rings. So the second time around. So yeah, you you just learn each time. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I know. learn from from my mistakes and things I I wish I could change. victoria: And I was just gonna add really quick. when it comes to like hospital birth, you can do all the right things and be prepared for like unmedicated hospital birth. And sometimes just like the hospital like routines make it a little bit hard to do that. And so just like understanding how hospitals work, and just that they do have like routine things that might come in and just check on you. Just you know, asking to not be disturbed as much to kind of help you into to labor. A couple things is, you know, doctors are gonna do their job and they might recommend things that might come up. And so when things come up and they're like, okay, we need to do a cervical check, or like, you know. You've been laboring for a long time. Why don't we do some Pitocin to kind of move things along? When those things come up and you're still really wanting to have the unmedicated birth, there's this really great acronym. It's called BRAIN. And B is like benefits. What are the benefits of this suggestion? what are the risks of example, like Pitocin? So share with me what those side effects are, complications, share with me the benefits. what are some Alternatives, like what can I try and said, okay, I'm gonna try different positions. Just give me some time to do this. And then intuition: what is your gut feeling? what is your gut saying? What do you feel like you need to do in this moment? And then the last one in is like nothing. What happens if we choose to wait in this moment, delay it an hour? and so like. using that example of like Pitosin, like, hey, you know, is baby okay? Am I okay? Let's let's wait an hour, come back, and we'll see where we're at. and so that can be really helpful when, you know, doctors are just doing their job. They just want to make sure that you're doing okay, baby's doing okay. so just wanted to share that. Jess Sittig: love that. I think that's super helpful and easy to remember. So when you are in, a high pressure situation like birth, and you're feeling pressured, that you can kind of take a moment to pause and go through that acronym. I really like that very much. victoria: And ha and having them leave the room while you process and not making a decision while they're still there. Say, hey, like me and my partner are gonna talk about this. I'm gonna have you come back. I think that's really important because that pressure can be like hard when they're like in the room and you need time to actually like process it. Jess Sittig: Mm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I love that. And I think that's so helpful and beneficial for moms to hear. And in so many decisions, I feel like birth is obviously a huge one, but I feel like in lots of things, I'm like, I need to just use that all the time. victoria: Yeah. For for anything. Yeah. Yeah, it's a good one. Jess Sittig: Yeah. I love that. Okay, so you have a podcast also. Can you tell us about it and what sparked I mean, I feel like this conversation will make it clear. But yeah. victoria: I do, yes. Right, yeah. yeah. So just having the boys at home. you know, I just wanted to create a space for moms to feel empowered. So just having like experts on my podcast about birth, about like health, we've talked a little bit about Just health in in your pregnancy. So I've had different experts on like ancestral nutrition for moms who are into that sort of thing and have the benefits of you know things like high protein that what we talked about, what that can and help create a foundation for you and your baby. I've had If you've heard of Dr. Stu, I was talking about him and how he has trained midwives, and he has a lot of like the research and like the wording that I can't communicate because I'm not an expert in that. Of like, here's like here's the studies, here's the information about stillbirths, here's the information about inductions Because I don't have that kind of knowledge. And so bringing on people, Just like different doulas who have really great tips on birth. And I I had my my birth photographer on recently just to share. Yeah, she had like she's been to like a thousand births. Jess Sittig: that's cool. victoria: Rather than you having to like search on your own to find how to breathe through labor, how to have an unmedicated birth or like the research, it's like I'm creating a space for that. I want moms to feel empowered about their birth because you know it's gonna be with them the rest of their lives. And you know, moms knowing that they can make informed decisions, I think is so powerful to know that they are the ones who make that decision, those decisions for their births. And that it's not your doctor who does that. They can make recommendations, but like really trusting your intuition. Obviously like Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: If you have if your baby's got medical issues or you have a medical condition, I think it's really important to do, you know, what you need to do with taking care of yourself and getting that support as well. And you know, there are moms who maybe don't have a condition and don't have complications and maybe they want that vaginal unmedicated birth in the hospital or at home and just knowing that there are options, even where it seems like there are no options. There are midwives out there if you want that who have gotten this training, maybe your baby is breached and your OB doesn't do breach vaginal births, they only do C sections. it's heartbreaking where that's like your only option. But there are midwives, if that's the route you want to go, who are trained in that, who have gotten trained by Dr. Stu. And it's extensive like training. and so just know that there are options for you. You're not stuck with just one option. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I think that's huge. And there's like strength in numbers, right? So being able to hear like from the experts about other vaginal unmedicated deliveries that it is possible and you can do it. And like here, here, here's how. I think that's so important and like you said, so empowering for moms to hear who are looking for that. So that's so awesome. victoria: Yeah. And I never thank you. And I just never want to overlook the moms whose twins spent time with the NICU or had a traumatic birth. because their stories matter deeply. And the medical, An adventure that they had was absolutely needed. And so there's a time and place for that. and for those who are, you know, wanting some options, it's okay to ask questions, it's okay to get a second opinion. If your provider is not respecting you, not honoring you, you can find a new one. Like you're the one paying them, okay? they work for you. Jess Sittig: Hmm. victoria: And so you're allowed to choose the path that feels right for you. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I think that's very well said. Like you are not stuck in a doctor in a doctor's office if if things aren't feeling right, then you have every right to look for another doctor, a second opinion. Yeah, absolutely. victoria: Hmm. And nothing is risk-free. Home birth is not risk-free. Hospital is not risk-free. It's so it's important to know the benefits and the risks of every situation. so I think that is important to know as well. Jess Sittig: Mm. Mm. Absolutely. And where can people connect with you and listen to the podcast? I will of course put all that stuff in the show notes, but victoria: Yes. Yeah, my Instagram is Whole Birth Wellness with Vic. And the podcast is Whole Birth Wellness. yeah. Jess Sittig: Awesome. And I always end every podcast with asking if you could have a heart to heart with a twin mom or give her a piece of advice. What would she say? victoria: Yeah, I would say it to have babies that are like full term. it's possible to for them to have a healthy birth weight, possible for you to have like no complications. and so know that there are moms out there that do experience that, that you're not pigeonholed to do one thing or have one outcome. if you are desiring, you know, more options that that is possible. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I love that. And it's so true. Well, thank you for all of your insight. And okay, I saw a quote recently and I feel like it's been this whole episode is like reminding me of that is like be be the example or be the reason that other moms think they can. And I think, you know, right? It's so good. And I think sometimes we think in our head, like, I want to do that, but I can't because I have twins or whatever, fill in the blank, right? So victoria: Hmm. Yep. So good. Mm-hmm. Yep. Jess Sittig: I think what you're doing is is so great and just showing that moms can do it. And yeah, so victoria: Yeah, it's it's really cool when I there's strangers who ask me about my birth experience because you know everyone wants to know about that which wins because it's very unique. and I get to share that I had my babies at home and I have noticed that people are like blown away that like we could actually birth our babies vaginally. And somehow it is possible, it's super wild to process that. but Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. victoria: It's just like so cool what we can do as moms. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah, absolutely. And that is so true. I feel like so, you know, we didn't really get into this on this podcast, but when you have twins, I feel like strangers like immediately have no boundaries. And yeah. And I feel like for the most part, I'm happy to answer questions as long as they're not like inappropriate or rude. but that's a question I get often is like, did you have a C-section? I'm like, no, I actually had them vaginally, and people are. victoria: Yeah. No boundaries. Yeah. Hmm. Right. Incredible. Like what? Like they let they let you do that? Jess Sittig: are shocked. And I'm like, yes, I that exactly. They're like, they didn't know that was an option. And a big part of that is like being an advocate for yourself that if you want it, it's not impossible. So victoria: Yeah, yeah. Yes. love it. This was like truly such a fun conversation. Thank you for making it so fun and like back and forth. And like I'm always the one having someone on my podcast. So it's just really just so lovely being on your podcast. Jess Sittig: Yeah. Yes, it was so fun. I had such a good time. I feel like we could talk that we could have so many more episodes. victoria: We really could and I Jessielee Sittig: This episode is brought to you by Thrive Market. Looking for healthy snacks delivered straight to your door? I got you. As a mom of three littles, I'm always trying to find ways to make my life easier. I've really been enjoying Thrive Market. They carry all of my favorite organic brands I don't feel guilty giving my kids. it's not just a market for food. I recently ordered a mineral sunscreen stick and fragrance-free bath bomb for my kids. Use my link in the show notes to get $20 off your first three orders and a free gift. Thank you for taking the time out of your busy twin mom life to listen along. I hope this podcast shed some light on a topic that's been on your heart and gave you more confidence as a twin mama. If you know a twin mom, please send this her way. If you like what you heard today, please subscribe to the podcast and leave a review. Check out the show notes to be connected with today's guest and get discount codes for brands I love. See you next Thursday. Until then. You are made for this.