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But Thy Love and Thy Grace - Francis J Finn SJ · December Tales

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  Speaker 1: Chapter one of but Thy Love and Thy Grace. This
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  Speaker 1: is the liprivox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the
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  Speaker 1: public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit
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  Speaker 1: LibriVox dot org. Recording by Maria Trece. But Thy Love
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  Speaker 1: and Thy Grace by Francis J. Finn asked Jay chapter one,
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  Speaker 1: what should you take a chance on? Why the diamond ring?
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  Speaker 1: Of course, it's only ten cents a chance, and there's
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  Speaker 1: nothing near as nice in the whole bazaar. The speaker
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  Speaker 1: was a young lady presiding over one of the prettiest
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  Speaker 1: and gayest boosts in the Saint Joseph's Orphan Asylum bazaar.
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  Speaker 1: She was addressing her remarks to a girl, who, as
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  Speaker 1: any woman could tell by her dress, was a working
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  Speaker 1: class The girl had a pleasing face. The features were refined,
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  Speaker 1: the eyes soft and of the tenderest blue, looking out
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  Speaker 1: mildly and kindly from dark silken arched slashes upon a
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  Speaker 1: world which wondered, why face and the habit shall correspond?
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  Speaker 1: So ill I might as well? She answered, I have
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  Speaker 1: twenty cents left. I am going in a minute, and
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  Speaker 1: I don't care about leaving with any money. Regina O'Connell
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  Speaker 1: had come into that bazaar with three dollars and twenty cents.
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  Speaker 1: It was not much to the bazaar, but to the
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  Speaker 1: gentle girl it represented the savings of six months. It
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  Speaker 1: represented all that she could spare for the orphans. Regina
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  Speaker 1: wrote her name for two chances, and the little book
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  Speaker 1: offered her then paid her money. There Now, she added,
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  Speaker 1: with a little laugh, I am light of pocket, and
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  Speaker 1: as far as the bazaar is concerned, I am through
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  Speaker 1: with it. The chance taken. Miss Margaret Dalton, who was
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  Speaker 1: prefect of the young lady's vidyality, looked at Regina kindly.
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  Speaker 1: She was touched by the fragile beauty of the working girl.
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  Speaker 1: Wouldn't you like to look at the ring? She said.
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  Speaker 1: They all say it is a very pretty one. Thank you,
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  Speaker 1: answered Regina gratefully. But I know you're busy, and I
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  Speaker 1: don't want to take up your valuable time. Regina said valible, prevaluable,
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  Speaker 1: out of deference to the kindly young lady. She was
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  Speaker 1: using her past words and pronouncing them according to her lights. Oh,
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  Speaker 1: it will be a pleasure to me to show it
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  Speaker 1: to you, said Miss Dalton, taking the girl's hand as
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  Speaker 1: she spoke. And leading her towards that thing a beauty,
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  Speaker 1: the young lady's fidelity booth. To make one's way through
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  Speaker 1: the crowd was no easy task. Wheels of fortune to
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  Speaker 1: write of them, weels of fortune till left of them.
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  Speaker 1: A surging crowd all round and about them, many holding
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  Speaker 1: bats in their hands, many struggling to buy them, Little
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  Speaker 1: boys who would get in the way, little girls who
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  Speaker 1: could not get out of it. A gentleman whispered to
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  Speaker 1: be running for office, surrounded by a knot of laughing girls,
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  Speaker 1: each waiting for her turn to hand to him her
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  Speaker 1: chance book. Some five or six young men smilingly trying
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  Speaker 1: to escape from Moselle's old lady, who was endeavoring to
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  Speaker 1: impress them with the idea that a silk dress which
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  Speaker 1: she was raffling would feel avoid in their lives. All
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  Speaker 1: these things may progress onward, a thing which require vigilance
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  Speaker 1: and determination. It was indeed a pretty sight revealed by
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  Speaker 1: the hundreds of sputtering electric lights. They shone upon faces
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  Speaker 1: which were on a parade of joy. When people come
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  Speaker 1: to a bazaar, it is only the first step that costs,
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  Speaker 1: once they have determined on going, once that they have
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  Speaker 1: set aside the money they intend spending. And strong a will,
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  Speaker 1: and armed and chipple brass is he who goes not
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  Speaker 1: beyond the limit he has set himself. The rest is
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  Speaker 1: a merry revel. If you wish to see for yourself
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  Speaker 1: that it is better to give than to receive by
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  Speaker 1: all means, go to a charity bazaar. Men and women
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  Speaker 1: pay high prices for things they do not want, and
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  Speaker 1: then chuckle over their extravagance. They are particularly happy when
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  Speaker 1: they pay something for nothing, and they become idiotically ecstatic
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  Speaker 1: when they have to borrow carfair to get home. An
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  Speaker 1: hour in a bazaar is a crowded hour of joyous life,
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  Speaker 1: an hour where every second registers joyous greetings and unexpected meetings,
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  Speaker 1: happy laughter, and delightful little jokes which fizzle away like
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  Speaker 1: the foam in a newly opened bottle of champagne, and
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  Speaker 1: won't in consequence stand repetition. All this and a glory
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  Speaker 1: of flowers, and a wonder of colors, and a blaze
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  Speaker 1: of light, and a gleaming of eyes, and a shuffling
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  Speaker 1: of feet, and a hum of voices. Grief for a
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  Speaker 1: season bids a place farewell. She stands at the door
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  Speaker 1: without stands so long that sometimes she falls asleep and
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  Speaker 1: so lets her patrons depart unconcerned and marry through such
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  Speaker 1: a crowd, and in such an hour, de Regina and
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  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton not unsuccessfully struggle. Within five minutes they had
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  Speaker 1: made over fifteen feet. I couldn't do everything you, Miss Dalton,
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  Speaker 1: in ground gaining the best day I ever played in
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  Speaker 1: the gridiron, said Fred Morris, the great half back of
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  Speaker 1: the Saint Francis College team, whom the young men of
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  Speaker 1: the city worshiped, and of whom the older citizens had
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  Speaker 1: never heard. Indeed, said mister Dalton, sweetly, but not at all,
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  Speaker 1: appreciating the compliment. Had he made a speech in Syrichaldick,
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  Speaker 1: she would have understood him equally well. At this juncture,
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  Speaker 1: an unexpected diversion attracted the surgeon crowd to another part
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  Speaker 1: of the building, leaving the immediate neighborhood of the young
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  Speaker 1: lady's Sidelity booth comparatively deserted, and Regina and Miss Dalton
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  Speaker 1: free to continue their progress without let or hindrance. They
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  Speaker 1: were standing presently before the large showcase of the wondrous booth,
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  Speaker 1: high on a throne of state in the very center
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  Speaker 1: of the case afrom It's blue fluffy satin lime box,
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  Speaker 1: leamed the diamond upon a dainty gold ring. Regina's face
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  Speaker 1: lighted up, her eyes grew very big and opened very large.
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  Speaker 1: Oh isn't it lovely? No woman could have said less
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  Speaker 1: or more. Perhaps you like to have it in your hand,
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  Speaker 1: continued the sympathetic Miss Dalton, a hearted warm to the
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  Speaker 1: poor girl. Oh don't put yourself to any trouble on
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  Speaker 1: my account, miss answered Regina, still keeping her sparkling eyes
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  Speaker 1: on the diamond. How I should like to win it?
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  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton quietly slipped behind the counter, opened the case, and,
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  Speaker 1: taking the ring from its box, handed it to the girl.
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  Speaker 1: Regina looked at it long, intently, hungrily. The diamond glittered
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  Speaker 1: in the light. When she raised her eyes. There were
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  Speaker 1: three diamonds glittering. At least, so thought a genial old
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  Speaker 1: irishman who had just lightened his purse and his heart
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  Speaker 1: by taking a chance on a picture rich in reds
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  Speaker 1: and dusted to the least vestige of green so arking charity.
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  Speaker 1: Carry a patriot, sure, miss, he said the Regina, as
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  Speaker 1: she raised her eyes. Sure a miss, that diamond be
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  Speaker 1: lost in your little hand. For the byes would be
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  Speaker 1: lookin at your shining eyes all the time, and wouldn't
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  Speaker 1: be looking at the ring at all at all. The
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  Speaker 1: old man was then captured by a woman with a book,
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  Speaker 1: and so missed the chance of commenting on the rich,
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  Speaker 1: blush purpled Regina's cheeks. This diamond must be worth hundreds
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  Speaker 1: and hundreds of dollars, she said, I wish it were,
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  Speaker 1: answered Miss Dalton, suppressing a smile. It is valued at
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  Speaker 1: sixty five dollars? Is that all? If I had it,
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  Speaker 1: I'd not sell it for that? No, indeed, I should
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  Speaker 1: be delighted if you were to win it. Thank you,
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  Speaker 1: Miss You are very kind. I don't know you, but
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  Speaker 1: your face is very familiar. Poor Regina got that word
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  Speaker 1: very badly to me. And I don't feel as if
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  Speaker 1: you was a stranger. And I know your face very
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  Speaker 1: well too, answered Miss Dalton, of set purpose, avoiding the
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  Speaker 1: word familiar. If I'm not mistaken, you go to Father
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  Speaker 1: mc nicholls to confession. Oh that's where I've seen you.
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  Speaker 1: I couldn't place you at first, but now I remember
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  Speaker 1: I seen you at church last Saturday evening. You're one
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  Speaker 1: of his penitents, aren't you. Yes, I've gone him for
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  Speaker 1: a year. He has done a lot of good to me.
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  Speaker 1: He makes me come every week. Miss Dalton gazed at
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  Speaker 1: Regina more sympathetically than ever, as the girl again fell
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  Speaker 1: to contemplating the glittering diamond ring. Miss Dalton belonged to
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  Speaker 1: one of the leading Catholic families of the city. She
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  Speaker 1: was refined else, such a refinement, indeed, that she could
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  Speaker 1: go out of her own walk of life into the
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  Speaker 1: slums without rubbing off or tarnishing the bloom thereof here
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  Speaker 1: is another case. She reflected of a loveliness born of
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  Speaker 1: frequent confession and communion. This poor child belongs to the tenements.
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  Speaker 1: She has lived, perhaps amidst scenes of squalor and drunkenness.
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  Speaker 1: Everything about her should have made her coarse and vulgar. Doubtless,
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  Speaker 1: she left school at the age of thirteen, and doubtless,
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  Speaker 1: for a time she promised to go wrong and became coarse.
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  Speaker 1: Then the confessor got a hold on her and persuaded
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  Speaker 1: her to frequent the sacraments. And now she is pure
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  Speaker 1: and modest and gentle, and just as refined as any
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  Speaker 1: girl can be. Who are surly more than a bowing
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  Speaker 1: acquaintance with words of three syllables. I think I'll cultivate her.
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  Speaker 1: She's worth a hundred educated girls who think only of themselves.
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  Speaker 1: My name is Margaret Dalton, she said aloud. Would you
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  Speaker 1: mind telling me yours? Oh no, I'm Regina O'Connell. I'm
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  Speaker 1: glad to make your acquaintance, Regina. It's fair we should
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  Speaker 1: know each other, since we sit beside each other in
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  Speaker 1: the church so often. Do you like going to confession
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  Speaker 1: every week? I didn't at first, answered Regina, returning the
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  Speaker 1: ring to Margaret. It took Father Nicholls a long time
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  Speaker 1: to get me to do it. You see, I used
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  Speaker 1: to go out so much on Saturday night. I'm ashamed
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  Speaker 1: to think of it now. Those balls are horrible. You
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  Speaker 1: didn't think so when you went to them? I dare
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  Speaker 1: say no, But I had no sense, not that i've
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  Speaker 1: much now for that matter, how long have you been working?
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  Speaker 1: Since I was eleven? My father wasn't doing nothing, and
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  Speaker 1: my sister got taken down with some spinal trouble, and
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  Speaker 1: so I went and said I was thirteen. Don't be shocked, miss,
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  Speaker 1: but I didn't mind a lie more or less then,
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  Speaker 1: and got a position on a shoe factory, and I've
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  Speaker 1: been working there ever since seven years. Do you like it?
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  Speaker 1: I have to. We're left alone now, me and my sister,
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  Speaker 1: and she's bedridden, poor thing, and the doctor says she
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  Speaker 1: won't last long. Oh she's lovely and so patient. She
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  Speaker 1: never complains, never asks for anything, and she's praying nearly
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  Speaker 1: all the time. She's worth working for. And you can
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  Speaker 1: stick a pin in that. Regina colored on realizing that
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  Speaker 1: her last statement, which couched in terms not quite suited
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  Speaker 1: to the occasion into her companion, is your sister alone
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  Speaker 1: all day most of the time. She is miss but
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  Speaker 1: she says she is never lonely. She says her beads,
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  Speaker 1: and then the Office of the Immaculate Conception. And then
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  Speaker 1: she has a book called Visits to Jesus. In the
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  Speaker 1: Tarran Nukele father Lessance's book, I think that's the one.
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  Speaker 1: A lady was in the house about a year ago
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  Speaker 1: and happened to see her and sent her the book.
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  Speaker 1: She reads out of it for an hour or two
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  Speaker 1: every morning. Then in the afternoon she reads story books
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  Speaker 1: part of the time. And I think she does a
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  Speaker 1: lot of praying on Sundays, though there are lots of
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  Speaker 1: the factory girls who come to see her, and they
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  Speaker 1: are just lovely to her. They bring her flowers and
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  Speaker 1: fruit and cake, and they talk so nice in her room.
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  Speaker 1: Some of them talk pretty coarse at work, and some
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  Speaker 1: of them use pretty bad language. But they are good
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  Speaker 1: at heart, every one of them. I am sure they are,
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  Speaker 1: said Miss Dalton, much better than people who would sneer
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  Speaker 1: at them. They are so unselfish. Once, when Rose that's
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  Speaker 1: my sister's name, was very sick, they took turns and
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  Speaker 1: staying up with her, two of them every night, and
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  Speaker 1: they went to work next day as though they had
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  Speaker 1: done nothing out of the usual. It's wonderful how kind
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  Speaker 1: everyone is to us. Won't you please take her? These flowers?
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  Speaker 1: Said Miss Dalton, ringing up from beneath the table, A
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  Speaker 1: bunch of violets. Oh, cried the girl, her eyes again
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  Speaker 1: out rivaling the diamond. How good you are. She just
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  Speaker 1: loves violets and hasn't seen any since last year. These
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  Speaker 1: are very early and they do smell lovely. Thank you,
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  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton. And now I think I had better go
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  Speaker 1: by the way. Would you mind my calling to see
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  Speaker 1: your sister some day? Mind? I was stoned to ask you,
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  Speaker 1: but I didn't like to very well. Please write the
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  Speaker 1: address on this card. It's in a tenement on Main Street,
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  Speaker 1: third floor back, murmured Reugina apologetically as she wrote her address. Oh,
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  Speaker 1: by the way, miss, if you were to let me
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  Speaker 1: have one of those books with chances on the Diamond Ring,
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  Speaker 1: I think I could try to have it filled out
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  Speaker 1: among my lady friends. In saying lady friends, poor Regina
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  Speaker 1: thought she was particularly happy Miss Dalton could forgive more
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  Speaker 1: than that. If you fill out this book, she said,
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  Speaker 1: you will be a benefactor of our booth and we
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  Speaker 1: shall be very grateful to you. I think I can
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  Speaker 1: do it, said Regina. Some of the girls won't come
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  Speaker 1: to the bazaar, but it's not because they do not
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  Speaker 1: feel kindly toward the poor little orphans. Some are ashamed
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  Speaker 1: on account of their clothes, and others because they haven't
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  Speaker 1: enough to spend. But there are plenty of them. It
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  Speaker 1: will only be too glad to take a few chances,
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  Speaker 1: no matter on what. I'm going to talk up the
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  Speaker 1: time and ring, and I'm sure it will get them interested.
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  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton had not quite succeeded in dismissing from her
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  Speaker 1: imagination this poor bright eyed, eager girl. When Father mc
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  Speaker 1: nicholls greeted her, Ah, Miss Dalton, this is no time
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  Speaker 1: for contemplation. Action is the order of the hour. I
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  Speaker 1: am surprised to see the prefect of this videlity bowed
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  Speaker 1: in thought when she should, of all women, be up
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  Speaker 1: and doing. I will act on your advice at once, Father,
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  Speaker 1: Here is my book of chances on the diamond ring.
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  Speaker 1: Perhaps you would like to put your name down? No,
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  Speaker 1: I should not. What should I do with a diamond ring? However,
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  Speaker 1: I will take a few chances. Father mc nicholls took
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  Speaker 1: the book and glanced at the numbers. Whose name shall
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  Speaker 1: I put down? He said, half to himself. Regina O'Connell's
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  Speaker 1: answered Miss Dalton promptly. Regina O'Connell never heard of her
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  Speaker 1: in my life, but you have heard her many a time. Father.
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  Speaker 1: She's a little working girl and one of your penitents.
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  Speaker 1: Then she must be a very good girl. Indeed, commented
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  Speaker 1: the father affably. Yes, why, of course all working girls
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  Speaker 1: are good. Never met any other sort since I was
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  Speaker 1: ordained well, Regina certainly is very good. She supports a
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  Speaker 1: sick sister, and works hard, and gets no pleasure in life,
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  Speaker 1: and is perfectly resigned and cheerful. She's a frail little
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  Speaker 1: creature too. It reminds me of a premature white and
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  Speaker 1: pink blossom in early April. Please don't say she gets
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  Speaker 1: no pleasure in life, Miss Dalton. If as you say,
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  Speaker 1: she is a weakly communicant, I am confident that God's
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  Speaker 1: love and grace make up for the things that are
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  Speaker 1: wanting in her narrow life. It is wonderful how generous
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  Speaker 1: God often is in filling with his heavenly consolations those
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  Speaker 1: whom he does not fill with bread. It is the
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  Speaker 1: rich that he sends away hungry. I'm afraid, sighed Miss Dalton,
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  Speaker 1: that some of us have already received our reward. There,
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: continued Father mc nichols, after a pause during which he
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  Speaker 1: was busily writing. I put miss Gina O'Connell's name down
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  Speaker 1: for ten chances. I'm going to tell her what you've
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  Speaker 1: done next time I see her. You will do nothing
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  Speaker 1: of the sort, cried Father mc nichols. Oh if you object, day,
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  Speaker 1: interrupted the priest. On second thought, I believe you are right.
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  Speaker 1: The girl is my penitent, you say. Perhaps knowing of this,
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  Speaker 1: she will be better affected toward me and be more
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  Speaker 1: willing to take advice. Who knows what I may be
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  Speaker 1: called on to say hard things to her. Yes, you
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  Speaker 1: may tell her, I certainly will. And Father, the poor
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  Speaker 1: girl was so delighted with the diamond, so anxious to
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  Speaker 1: win it. I intend to put her down for five
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  Speaker 1: chances every day until the end of the bazaar. And
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to get my sisters and brothers interested too.
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  Speaker 1: And then when some man comes along who is spending
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  Speaker 1: his money simply out of charity, you might suggest Regina's name.
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  Speaker 1: Some men are grateful for little hints. Good Bye and
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  Speaker 1: good luck to you and all your undertakings. End of
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: chapter one, chapter two of but thy love and thy grace,
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: my Francis, Jay Fin asked Jay. This LibriVox recording is
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: in the public domain recording by Maria Therese, chapter two.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Three days later, or to put it more definitely, on
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: the following Saturday day, at nine o'clock of the evening,
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: Father mc nicholls, seated in his confessional, was making heroic
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: efforts to keep awake the person on the other side
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  Speaker 1: of this green had finished her little tale of sins
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  Speaker 1: and was saying, for these isn't all the sins which
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  Speaker 1: I do not remember. I humbly ask pardon of God
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  Speaker 1: and of you, my ghostly father, penance and absolution. Father
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: mc nicholls suddenly noticed, with a start and a jerk
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  Speaker 1: that he had fallen into a trance of how lengthy
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  Speaker 1: a duration he knew? Not for your penance, my child,
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: He said, say, three, hail Mary's by the way, do
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  Speaker 1: you work? Yes? Father? When do you stop at half
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  Speaker 1: past five? Well? How is it you come so late?
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: I'm sit a sleepy head at this hour? You know,
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  Speaker 1: can't you come earlier? I always do, father, But the
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  Speaker 1: day I was going about among the girls who work
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  Speaker 1: in the factory with me to get them to take
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  Speaker 1: a chance on the diamond ring, sleep very suddenly took
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  Speaker 1: unto itself. The wings of the morning, the diamond ring,
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  Speaker 1: he repeated, It was no longer nine of the night,
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  Speaker 1: but five of the afternoon. Yes, father, And I'm so
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  Speaker 1: thankful to you for putting my name down for ten chances.
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  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton told me about it. I'll feel happy over that,
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  Speaker 1: even if I don't ring the valuable ring. The word
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: valible quick in the confessor's memory. He knew few of
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: his penitents in the confessional, perhaps six one little boy
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: made the confitio or more gloomy and mysterious by confessing
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: to blessed Michael the dark Angel. A little girl, on
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: the other hand, lightened the gloom of the same prayer
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: by changing the arch angel into an arch angel. There
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: was also a young lady who, for reasons known only
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: to her creator, always giggled and saying that's all bother.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: A working boy invariably accused himself of committing the scent
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: of detraction whenever he tried to pray. An old woman
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: had the habit of cursing the devil, and Father mc nicholls,
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: wondering whether Heaven's chancery said it to or against her account,
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: was often tempted to ask whether she did it before
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: or after meals. All these and a few others who
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: had certain peculiarities of voice or pronunciation, Father mc nichols
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: knew Regina's earmark was the mispronunciation of several words, prominent
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: among which was the word valuable. In Father mc nicholl's mind,
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: Regina was cataloged as his valuable penitent. Oh now, I
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: remember you said, the confessor. You're the girl that I
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: thought God was calling to a high degree of perfection.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: You said that to me many times, Father, Yes, and
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: I meant it. Do you make your spiritual reading every day? Yes, Father,
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: for at least ten minutes. And don't you find that
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: it helps you to pray better? Yes? Father, whenever I
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: read a chapter Thomas A. Kempess with attention, I can
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: see my prayers ever so much more easy. And what
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: about that little prayer of Saint Ignacious I gave you
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: a few weeks ago? Do you say it sometimes? Father,
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: when I'm brave? I hope you will grow brave every day,
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: my child. And I don't wonder at your fearing to
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: say that prayer. I know very holy men who say
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: it with timidity. It is an act of perfect love
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: of God. Also, it is an act of perfect renunciation.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: The very first words, take, O Lord, and receive all
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my whole will,
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: whatever I have and possess our perfect generosity. Then the
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: words thou hast given me these things to thee, O Lord,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: do I return them our true gratitude and true love,
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: receive them, dispose of them according to the extent of
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: thy will, our resignation to God's will in all things
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: and then, my child, The concluding words, if really meant
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: by their utter earth, are enough to stir the courts
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: of heaven. Give me but thy love and thy grace,
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: for these are sufficient for me. That is one of
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: the most sublimest prayers of human composition to be found
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: outside of the Gloria and the preface. If indeed either
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: of these may be considered of human origin. When you
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: really can say and mean that prayer, you are on
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: the road to sanctity. Ah but Father, there is the trouble.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: There are lots of other things I want, and I'm
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: afraid to think of praying not to get them. For instance,
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: Oh Father, I do so want that diamond ring, and
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: I do not think that you should want it with
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: over much eagerness. Try to get rid of that desire,
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: my child, It is only a vain imagination. And then father,
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: you know him, Oh him, echoed the confessor, mentally, adding,
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: I've forgotten all about him. Well, what about him? He's been
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: drinking again, Father, and I feel so bad. He promised
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: me two months ago that he wouldn't touch a drop
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: for a year, and now I don't know what to do.
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: I've given him my promise and I do love him,
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: but it sickens me to think that I'm going to
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: marry a drunkard. But what am I to do? For
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: several seconds, Father McNichols hesitated before answering if he can't
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: keep sober for love now that he's trying to get you,
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: he most probably will not once you are bound to
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: him forever. Shall I give him up? Then? Father, I
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: leave it to your own judgment and the workings of grace. Meantime,
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: try to say that prayer once every day, and especially
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: just after receiving holy comunion. God, bless you go in peace.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: End of chapter two, Chapter three of but Thy Love
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: and Thy Grace My Francis J. FINNSJA. The Slipperbox recording
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: is in the public domain. Recording by Maria Tree. Chapter three.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: The room of Regina O'Connell and her sister was small
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: and very sparingly furnished. Two common chairs, a plain wooden table,
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: a heavy bed of the same material, and a small
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: stove made up the furniture. Upon the wall was the
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: coarse print representing the Savior showing his sacred heart. It
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: was so placed that the invalid upon the bay could
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: see it without turning despite the poverty of its appointments,
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: The room was as clean as the traditional Dutch kitchen.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: Rose O'Connell was lying on her back, her fragile hands
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: clasped together over the coverlet. Her face was pale and thin.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: Her eyes were large, lustrous, and shaded by exquisitely penciled brows.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: Occasionally a moan of pain escaped from her lips. Suddenly
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: she dashed her hands across her eyes. The look of
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: pain disappeared as in a flash, and a smile, joyous
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: expectant glorified her pathetic little face. She heard the step
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: so loved, so familiar. Without the door opened, and Regina
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: hastened into the room. How is my dearest little sister
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: this evening, she cried, bending down and kissing the upturned face. Fine, Regina,
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: I've had several visitors during the day, and they all
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: talked and laughed so that I forgot my poor old back.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: And how is the pain to day? Ah? You've been crying, dearest.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: Now tell the truth, haven't you? A little? Regina? But
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: it wasn't the pain altogether? What else, dear? You were
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: coughing so last night, Regina, and then you looked so
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: tired about the eyes. And then your step isn't like
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: what it used to be. It's heavier, and you don't
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: smile so easily. And last night and the night before
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: you was moaning in your sleep. Oh, my own dear sister,
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: if you were to get sick and suffer, I couldn't
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: stand it. Why doesn't goll lay it all on my back?
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: Let him put it on me. I'm used to it. Oh,
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: I'm murmuring. Now, God forgive me. Rose began to weep afresh.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: There were tears struggling in Regina's eyes, too, but she
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: kept them back bravely. Now, Rose, she said, don't you
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: go praying to get my troubles. I won't have it.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: You've had your share an more. And then, Rose, I'm
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: not going to groan any more in my sleep. I
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: did have a little trouble, but it's all over, thank God.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: You know he got to drinking again, Yes, I know,
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: And I didn't know what to do. But the day
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: he went and took the pledge and he won't touch
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: liquor any more. He met me on my way home
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: from work, and he was so nice and afforable. He
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: says he's going to be a man from this out. Oh,
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: he was so nice, and he wrote me just a
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: most lovely poem with his own hand. He did, yes,
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: he told me he sat up all night composing it.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: I've got it with me and I intend to keep
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: it all my life. Would you like to hear it,
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: my dear, Oh, yes, just to think that he could
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: write Poe, Let's hear it, Regina from her bosom, Regina
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: blushingly took out a sheet of ordinary fool scrap paper.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: It's just lovely, she commented, And the words are so fine.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: Here's the way it goes. Believe me, if all these
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: endearing young charms which I gaze on so fondly to day,
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: which had changed by tomorrow, and fleet in my arms
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: like fairy gifts fading away, thou wilt still be adored
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: as this moment Thou art, Let thy loveliness fade as
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: it will, and around the dear Ruin each wish of
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: my heart would entwine itself rudently. Still it's simply grand,
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: cried Rose ecstatically. But that's not all, dear, There's more
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: just as good. Read that part over, do, Oh, it
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: is so beautiful and sweet, and it's true. You could
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: never grow ugly to me, dearest, And your charms couldn't
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: what's that word? Oh, yes, your charms couldn't fleet No, never, never,
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: never read it again, Regina, I'm going to get it
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: by heart. So Regina read the first danza, a second
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: and the third time, after which Rose recited it from memory,
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: clapping her poor little hands for door at her success.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: Oh I just love poetry, she cried. And I didn't
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: know it, Regina. I'm going to give up story books
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: and read poetry. It is heavenly. I'm just crazy to
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: hear the rest now, and I'm going to learn it
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: by heart too. Go on, dear, read the rest. I
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: wonder what he means by and twine itself virdantly? Still,
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: what is virdantly? I guess it means like an ivy
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: or maybe a honeysuckle. Oh, Regina, I never thought so
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: much of him before. With Regina and Rose, mister Thomas
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: betterly aged twenty three, occupation and mechanic was always him.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: Her cheeks flushing prettily, Regina continued, it is not all
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: beauty in youth or thy own and thy cheeks and
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: profane by a tear that the fervor and faith of
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: a soul may be known, to which time will would
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: make thee more dear. Oh, the heart that is truly
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: loved never forgets, and as truly loves onto the clothes,
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: as the sunflower turns to her God when he sets,
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: the same look which she turned when he rose. My,
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: isn't it like angels talking? Cried the invalid, her cheeks
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: blazing with fervor. And it's so true. You do get
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: dearer to me every day, Regina. Time does make thee dear.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: And it's so sad because there will be a close
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: I I think, dear that I'm getting worse. And and
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: here Regina gave a little sob, and the clothes is coming.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: But you will be my sunflower to the last, and
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: I'll turn to you. She stopped. Suddenly Regina had thrown
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: her arms around the child's neck, and in a long
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: embrace they sobbed together. It was an hour of exultation.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: The cross and the crown, the sweet and the bitter,
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: the loveliness and pathos of two sweet and simple lives
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: were wondrously intermingled. But the bitterness, the cross, and the
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: pathos were all sweetened in made light by the faith
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: and the love and the grace of Him whose picture
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: looked down on them both from the bare wall. Now, dear,
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: continued Rose, after a long silence, let us say that
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: prayer together. It is a poem too, and I am
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: so tired. I want to say it while I can.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: Egina slipped to her knees, still holding the dear head.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: With her arms together, they recited, Take, O Lord, and
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: receive on my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: whole will, whatever I have and possess. Thou hast given
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: me these things, O Lord, to thee O Lord, do
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: I return them, receive them, dispose of them according to
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: the extent of thy will. Give me but thy love
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: and thy grace, for these are sufficient for me. Tomorrow,
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: Rose added, presently, I am going to read nothing but poetry.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: It it makes me love God more. And and you, too, dearest,
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: kiss me good night. I am so tired, so tired.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: Regina kissed the wan face tenderly, and then turned away.
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: Ushiver ran through her frame, and there was a coldness
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: at her heart. How wan, how pinched, yet how unutteredly
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: lovely was the poor little fading Rose. Oh my god,
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: my god, she muttered, anything but that anything. She corrected
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: her thought and added, give me but thy love and
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: thy grace. She was startled presently by the sound of
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: Rose's voice, clear but so weak. Regina, the pain is
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: all gone. Oh, I feel so nice. There is a change,
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: no pain. Oh, thank God for his goodness. It has
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: gone at last, and now I shall sleep well. It
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: is all gone. It has been with me since the
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: new year. Thank God. I shall read poetry tomorrow, nothing
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: but poetry. An then good night, Regina said nothing. Her
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: sister had sunk into slumber. How peaceful, how sweet, how lovely?
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: The face on the pillow had groan. Yes, the look
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: of pain was gone. Thank God, Thank God, echoed Regina.
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: Thank God for all his mercies. A moment later, there
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: came alone, knocked at the door. Regina advanced on tiptoe.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: She found Miss Dalton standing without. Oh how do you do,
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton, She whispered, You are most welcome. I didn't
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: think you'd come so soon. My sister's fallen asleep. Do
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: come and look at her. Just before she dozed off,
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: she told me that all the pain had left her,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: And oh, her face is so beautiful. She is sleeping
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: so soundly, and doesn't moan as she used to. Thank God,
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: Thank God, come and see her and step lightly, miss
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: for Rose is not slight down these many months. Tomorrow,
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: she added absently, she is going to read poetry. Miss
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: Dalton followed Regina to the bedside. As she looked, she started, then,
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: bending down, she put her face close to the sleepers.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: Does the priest come to see her occasionally? She asked? Presently, Oh, yes,
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: Father dill On, our parish priest, hissed, ma jest lovely.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: He anointed her one week ago, and this morning he
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: brought her holy communion. But Miss Dalton, why do you
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: look so? What is the matter, my dear girl, said
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton, vainly, striving to keep back the tears. Your
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: poor sister will never suffer again, is is, oh, Miss Dalton,
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: God pity you, Regina. Let us kneel down and pray.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: The poetry of all the ages and of eternity itself
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: had been thrown open to Rose O'Connell end of chapter three,
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: Chapter four of but Thy Love and Thy Grace by
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Francis J. Finn asked Jay. This LibriVox recording is in
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: the public Nomean recording by Maria Therese chapter four. The
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: bazaar had come to an end, but all was not finished.
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: Among other things, the raffle of the Diamond Ring was postponed.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: Some of the books containing chances had not been returned
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: in time, and moreover, there was a demand on the
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: part of a great many for more chances. So for
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: three weeks after the closing of the bazaar, the books
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: went round merrily. After the burial of Rose, poor Regina
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: was utterly disconsolate. Many and many a time did her
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: heart ger rebellious against the will of God. She found
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: it almost impossible to pray. She muttered the words with
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: her lips, but her heart was turned to Rose and
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: crying out for her to come back. Oftentimes, despondency so
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: ceased her soul that she was frightened at herself. Then,
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: in bitterness of heart, she would repeat over and over,
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: give me but thy love and thy grace, But thy
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: love and thy grace. Poor child, she was alone in
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: the world. The girls with whom she worked were very
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: gentle and attentive. He too, rose somewhat to the occasion,
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: and her love went out to him with its former freshness.
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: She could not forget that his poem had brightened the
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: last moments of gentle rose. The verses had put him
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: in a new and wondrous light. Surely, the man who
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: could write such sentiment and meter must be noble of
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: mind and of heart. Tom was a great service to
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: her in those first days of sorrow, not the real Tom,
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: but the Tom whom she saw under the light that
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: was not his. Sometimes, and in God's sweet providence, it
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: is good to live in a fool's paradise. As a
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: matter of fact, Tom was below Regina in every way.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: He was coarse, selfish, and weak. His love for Regina
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: was the most salivating thing in his poor, sordid life.
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: Whenever he left her presence, he departed vowing to do better.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: The spirit indeed was willing. One week before the holding
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: of the Raffle, Miss Margaret Dalton called to see Regina. Well, Regina,
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: she continued, after the first words of greeting, what are
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: you going to do with yourself? I go to my work,
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: Miss Daughton, but that doesn't take me from my thoughts.
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: And then at night, when I'm alone, I sit here
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: and think and remember, I'm afraid, my dear, that you
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: are unhappy. Yes, Miss call me Margaret, Please thank you, Yes, Margaret,
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: I do feel so wretched. All the pleasure has gone
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: out of my life. She paused, then added almost for
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: she was thinking of her in gratitude to her glorified Tom.
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: But you must try to go on cheerfully, Regina. It
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: is not the will of God. I think that we
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: should give our up to the melancholy luxury of grief.
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: We are on earth to serve Him and to work.
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: If you were to throw yourself into some interest or
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: other and give your time to it, I am sure
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: that your sister Rose would be pleased and you would
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: not feel the pain of her loss. So sensibly, yes,
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton, Yes Margaret, but I can't do anything at night.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: I feel worn out, and worst of all, I can't sleep.
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: And then while I lay awake, I see her face
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: coming and going, coming and going, shining out from the
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: blackness of the room. And oh, I wish, I wish
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: over and over that I was dead and with Rose again.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: It's all a matter of a few years, my dear,
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: said Margaret softly, as she clasped the wretched girl's hands
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: on her own. Be patient and wait. God is counting
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: every moment, and each seed a sorrow. So in each
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: moment will blossom elsewhere into a flower of joy. Ah, yes, ma'am, Yes, Margaret.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: But then my heart gets the rebellious at times, and
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: I feel impatient with God. It scares me. Oh, He'll
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: not reward me for the way I've been acting. I
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: think he will, my dear, for one moment of impatience
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: in the hour. There are a thousand moments of resignation
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: to God's will, and God will forget those moments of
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: impatience oh so easily. But he will never forget all
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: the other moments of resignation. Do you think so, miss
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: I certainly do. God's ways are not our ways. In
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: my own case, I find that sometimes I forget a
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: thousand and one acts of kindness and courtesy show me
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: by a friend on account of one rude word or
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: some slight oversight. It makes me ashamed to think of
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: it when I remember how easily God forgives and forgets.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for what you've said, Miss Dalton.
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: It's just lovely, and I think I will be braver
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: after this. Oh, miss Dalton, tell me what to do.
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: The words in which this question was couched recalled to
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: the mind of the prefect, attaching him to our lady,
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: who council sung on occasions by the sideality Choir. Suppose
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: Regina you join our sidality. I blessed mother, who is
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: the consoler of the afflicted, will surely assist you in
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: a special way if you put yourself under her standard
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: in a special way. Oh, I should so like to,
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: but I was afraid to ask. Do you think I'm
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: good enough? Indeed? I do, But then I'm poor, And
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: there are so many fine ladies in your sidality. Do
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: you think they would care about me being with them?
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: I don't know what you mean by fine ladies, answered
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: Miss Dalton with some vivacity. If you mean women whose
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: standard of ladyship is the world's point of view, there
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: are none with us. But I have yet to find
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: out that worldly culture in wealth can give us as
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: perfect a lady as do the frequentation of the sacraments
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: and the living of a good Catholic life. There are
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: domestics in the sidelity who have much better manners than
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: their mistresses. In fact, the most vulgar people in the world,
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: I believe, are the rich people who have not got
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: quite used to their riches. Sometimes I have thought so myself.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: I've often wondered that the women who school the conductors
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: and make fossils on the street cars are always finely dressed.
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: I haven't, Regina. Money has brought in and developed the vulgarity,
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: and they are sufficiently educated to give it expression in
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: the Queen's English. But to get back to the civility,
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: Oh yes, I'll be delighted to join. I want it too.
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: Long ago, but we were so poor, and poor Rose
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: needed all we could earn. But now I think I can. Oh,
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: don't bother about the money, Regina. We prefer good sabalitists
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: to good money, though of course we need that too.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: Father mc nichols doesn't want any deserving girl to stay
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: without because she is poor. By the way, how are
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: you getting on with the book on the ring? We
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: want all the return This is by Monday. The raffle
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: takes place on the following night. That's a fact. How
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: careless and selfish I've been. I've filled my book long ago,
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: but my poor sister's death threw it out of my mind. Here,
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: she added, pulling out the drawer of the table and
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: bringing there firm a package, latly done up in white paper,
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: here's the book and the money. By the way, couldn't
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: you give me another book? I want to work now
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: from now till Monday. I'll give all my spare time
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: to getting chances. Oh, she broke out her eyes, Kindling,
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: it is such a lovely ring. I am almost ashamed
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: to say it, but I still want to win it.
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: You shall have another book tomorrow, Regina, and don't forget
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: to come to the next meeting of the Cidelity. You
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: shall be most welcome. Keep busy, Regina. Your sister is
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: happy and want you to be content. I had Father
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: mc nicholl say a mass for her yesterday. Regina had
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: no words to thank Miss Dalton for this great kindnesses.
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: The tears came to her eyes as she pressed the
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: hands of her new friend. Miss Dalton left her weeping,
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: but happier than she had been since the death of
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: her sister. End of chapter four. Chapter five of Put
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: Thy Love and Thy Grace by Francis J. Finn S j.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: This LibriVox recording is in the public domain recording by
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: Marie Therese, Chapter five. It was the night of the Raffle.
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: On that occasion, the library hall of the Young Lady's
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: Fidelity was almost uncomfortably crowded. The workers in the bazaar,
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: and their number was legion, were all present, and so
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: were their friends and their friends friends to about the
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: fourth degree. The librarian, smiling and appable, was showing not
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: without pride, the treasures of the library to several portly gentlemen,
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: one of whom, as those features indicated, was Jewish blood.
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: A whisper went around among the workers that he was
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: as rich as Cursius. That's the way it started, but
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: by the time it had passed from one month to fifty,
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: it was crept it in two. He is as rich
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: as Crazy. Whereupon the uninitiated gazed on him fixedly, many
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: wondering whether he was as harmless as he appeared to be.
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: Did the librarian know he was crazy, they asked themselves.
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: Apparently she did not, for her easy air of smiling
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: and concern in her light laugh rich a cheerfulness, evinced
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: that she was utterly without fear. He doesn't look crazy,
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: Regina was saying to the secretary of the sodality, crazy,
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: I should think, not, returned the official. He's a very good,
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: sensible man, and has been one of the best friends
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: of our bazaar, even if he is a Jew. By
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: the way, do you know that you and he have
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: done more to bring in money on the Diamond Ring
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: than any two people in the city him and me,
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: cried Regina, the color rushing to her pale chaine. Why
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: I didn't do anything to speak of. I just got
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: three books filled, yes, but all the same. Your name
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: is down for more chances than his, and he paid
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: down cash for fifty in my presence, besides other chances
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: I've heard he's taken. At this moment, the Prefect of
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: the Stylity, accompanied by the two assistants, came over to
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: where Regina was seated. Miss O'Connell, said the Prefect. In
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: the name of our sidality and the orphans, we wish
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: to thank you for the work you have done in
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: the interests of our raffle. If there were a dozen
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: more like you and our sodality, I think we should
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: practically own the town. Thank you, Miss Dalton, said Regina,
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: rising in some confusion. Her face, which had grown pale
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: and wan since we last saw her, flushed violently. And
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: I do hope, added the first assistant kindly, that you
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: may win it, and so do I said the second assistant,
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: her eyes beaming genuinely through her glasses. I am sorry,
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: I can't agree with you, so the librarian, as she
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: pushed her way up to the group along with the
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: man who was rich, is crazy. Here's my candidate for
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: the ring. He wants it, and if he wins it,
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: he intends to present us with fifty dollars for our library.
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: Oh dear, cried Regina. If that's the case, I I
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: almost helpe you'll win. And let me suggest an amendment,
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: said the prefect, mister Fairweather. I propose that in case
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: you win, or miss Regina O'Connell, you give the fifty dollars.
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: You see, mister Fairweather, Regina has worked herder for that
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: ring than any one, and in a number of chances taken,
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: she is your rival. Mister Fairwether looked at Regina kindly
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: and benevolently. He took him much of her story at
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: a glance. Has she been the finest lady in the land.
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: He could not have been more courteous. It is indeed
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: a pleasure, he said, bowing to meet arrival in such
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: a cause they are not the kind I usually meet.
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: I am sorry to say, Miss Dalton. He went on
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: I'm obliged to you for the suggestion. I shall be
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: delighted to give your library fifty dollars if I win
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: sixty dollars, if miss O'Connell be the lucky one. Oh
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: my goodness, cried the librarian. I do hope things will
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: go as they ought to mister Fairweather. You are so
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: good and kind that I will add another suggestion. In
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: case neither of you win, we may count upon twenty
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: five dollars. Anyhow, may we not? What do you say
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: to that, Miss Dalton, said mister Fairweather, smiling benevolently. It's
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: a brilliant suggestion. The librarian laughed lightly and glided away.
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: She knew that the matter was settled. Somewhat, to Regina's dismay,
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: the old gentleman seated himself beside her. Is he crazy,
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: she asked herself. But even if you were not, it
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: would be an ordeal to make talk with a man
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: whose daily income exceeded her entire earnings of a year. Presently, Nevertheless,
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: she found herself talking easily, frankly about her sister and
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: all the circumstances of her lovely death. Next, she was
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: listening intently to mister Fairweather, who despite a slight German accent,
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: spoke with a noble impressiveness. He was conversing about death
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: and saying how much he wondered at the quiet, calm
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: way in which good Catholics await the final summons. Had
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: he been a priest, his sentiments would have been perfectly appropriate.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: Just then, a hail old gentleman clapped his hands for silence.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: He was standing on a raised platform. Ah that's mister Dalton,
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: whispered mister Fairweather to Regina. What the father of miss Dalton. Yes,
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: and one of the finest men in town. If all
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: your rich Catholics were like him, you wouldn't need bazaars,
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen. Mister Dalton was saying, I have the
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: honor to announce to you that we are now going
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: to find out to whom the diamond ring belongs. We're
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: going to go about it in this way, in this bag. Here,
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: mister Dalton gravely held up a white sack, upon whose
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: chase surface there shown out in blue characters xxx finest
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: brand in this bag are all the numbers taken by
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: the various chance takers. Out of this bag. The lucky
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: number will be taken the first, second, and third numbers
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: will not count. No, the thirteenth number taken out will
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: be the lucky one. Now we want a little boy,
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: the little or the better, to take out the numbers,
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: and one man to read them out, and another man
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: to verify his reading. Mister Fairweather, couldn't you excuse me
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: if you please, mister Dalton interrupted mister Fairweather. But I
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: hope to win that ring myself. Get someone who isn't
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: quite so interested. A small boy and two men were
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: presently secured. Mister Dalton shook the sack energetically, then, opening
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: its mouth slightly, bade the urchin thrust in his hand
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: and bring forth one slip of paper. The boy obeyed
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: and gave the slip to the announcer. Seventeen twenty eight.
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: Eight he called seventeen twenty eight, cried the verifire Again,
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: the bag was shaken nineteen eleven, twenty three, eighty four,
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: forty eight, twenty three, ninety eighty nine, four two thirty one, twelve,
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: twenty one, eleven, eighteen twenty one, twenty four, thirty five,
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: sixty eight thirty two. Now, ladies and gentlemen, cried mister
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: Dalton in a loud voice, though he might have spoken
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: in a whisper and then heard, so tense was the silence.
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: The next number is the winning number. May the one
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: who gets it deserve it. Whereupon he began to shake
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: the bag with comical violence. The laughing that followed suddenly
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: changed to a groan as the mouth of the sack
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: slipped in his hand, and a number of tickets flew
• 48:49
  Speaker 1: through the air and fell scattering upon the floor. The
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: crab moved back, and the workers were upon their knees
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: at once, recovering the precious lips. Say was to the lame,
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: burying into the eel and kneeling, Prefect, while you're down there,
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: say a little prayer that Regina O'Connell may win. Isn't
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: she a dear little thing? We've all been praying for her,
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: answered the Prefect quickly. The slips were recovered quickly, where
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: they returned into the sack, and violently, but with much
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: more care than mister Dalton, shake it for the last time.
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: The boy took out a slip and handed it to
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: the announcers. Number three hundred and six ah came involuntarily
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: from the mouth of Miss Dalton. Number three hundred and six,
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: announced mister Dalton, finding the corresponding stump, and a bulk
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: hand at him, Mister Regina O'Connell. At this there was
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: tremendous applause. It's one of the ten chances that Father
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: McNichols took for her, whispered the Prefect to the librarian.
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: At the mention of her name. Regina arose and stood
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: in some embarrassment, whereupon mister Fairweather, with nightly courtesy, escorted
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: her to the foot of the platform, and, taking the
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: ring from mister Dalton, handed it to the girl, Miss O'Connell.
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: He said, I've been beaten before, but this is one
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: of the few times in my life that I am
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: glad to be worsted. Amid another burst of applause, he
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: conducted Regina back to her place, where she was forced
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: to shake hands with and receive the congratulations of nearly
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: all in attendance. Regina was very happy then, why who
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: can tell? She had set her heart on the ring,
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: It had fascinated her, desire of it had groan with
• 50:32
  Speaker 1: each day, and now it was her very own. And
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: then too, the kind words, the smiles, the sympathetic looks
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: of all these people fell like balm upon her innocent heart.
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: For a time the girl was in heaven. She slipped
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: the ring upon her finger and turned it this way
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: and that, watching it changing splendors with all the delight
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: of a child. The poor girl was enjoying her first toy.
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: She was aroused by the voice of mister Fairweather, miss O'Connell.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: He was saying, in case you should ever wish to
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: part with that ring, Oh dear, no, interrupted Regina. Never,
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: mister Fairwether smiled, very good, Miss O'Connell. But in case
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: you should call on me at any time, I am willing,
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: or rather I should be glad, to pay you its
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: market value, which is I believe sixty five dollars. Here
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: is my car with my residence address. Thank you, sir,
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: You are very good, but I don't think that I
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: should care to sell my beautiful ring for even a
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: hundred dollars. I am very very glad you like it
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: so much, my dear young lady, said the old gentleman,
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: and indeed his kindly face gave Earnest that his feelings
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: were at one with his words. Regina was about to
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: acknowledge his gracious speech when mister Dalton again clapped his
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: hands and called the assembly to order, Ladies and gentlemen.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: He said, I take great pleasure in announcing to you that,
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: in honor of this pleasant occasion, an occasion for once
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: when the right prize goes to the right person, Miss
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: rosamond Attus, the gifted soprano whom all Cincinnati delights to honor,
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: has kindly consented to sing a solo. Mister Dalton hill
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: of his hand for silence. Nevertheless, love pause continued for
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: nearly a minute. Miss Otis, a tall, pantsome young lady,
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: stationed herself beside the piano, and accompanied by the pianists
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: of the occasion, sang May Morning. The audience was so
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: delighted that an encore was imperative. After a short delay,
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: miss Otis sang, oh, believe me of all these endearing
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: young charms, Oh, corver Regina involuntarily, and putting her hand
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: to her heart. Then she addressed herself to listen. Regina
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: had Irish blood in her veins, and no person of
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: Irish blood ever yet listened unmoved to this sweet melody.
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: But to Regina it appealed, as perhaps it never yet
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: appealed to any listener. Again she was standing beside her
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: dying sister. Again, she saw the dear face flush and
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: the gentle eyes kindled under the inspiration of the poet's thought.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Despite her endeavors, she could not restrain a sob, and
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: the tears rushed to her eyes and stained her wan cheeks.
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: She hid her face in her handkerchief and listened with
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: all her soul. Miss Otis was at her best on
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: that memoriable night. She sang with a pathos which went
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: to every heart. Presently, the weeping girl began to wonder
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: where miss Otis could have got the verses. Regina wore
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: them next her heart. She has shown them to no
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: one save Rose. Here was a mister to be cleared.
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: With an effort, she composed herself. Sir, she said to
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: mister Fairweather, aren't they beautiful words? Very, answered the old
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: gentleman emphatically. I know who wrote them, sir, No doubt,
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: no doubt, assented mister Fairweather. Affably, everybody with Irish blood
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: knows and loves Tom Moore's Irish melodies, and a great
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: many with no Irish blood at all, myself, for instance, more,
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: repeated Regina, looking puzzled, Yes, why what's the matter, my
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: dear young lady. Of course you know that Tom Moore
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: wrote them, as you said. Regina gave a gasp. The
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: pain all the color had left her face. She rose nervously.
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: But what's the matter, miss O'Connell. Are you ill? Can't
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: I do anything for you? No? No, I I must
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: leave it once. Excuse me, sir, I wish to be alone.
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: Regina slipped from the hall, and when she was on
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: the staircase landing outside, she gasped and grew faint, and
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: was obliged to lean against the wall for support. No
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: tears came to her eyes. Her grief was beyond that.
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: The moment of disillusionment had come, and a terrible, almost
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: heartbreaking moment it was Her love was gone forever. She
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: had loved not Tom but her own, false, though noble
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: conception of that very ordinary young man. But now the
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: ideal had cumbled away, and she stood face to face
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: in her mind's eye with the real, a coarse, selfish, untruthful,
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: weak willed lover. Grief changed to rage. For the first
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: time and many a long year, Regina was really angry.
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: The great wave of indignant feeling which flooded her soul
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: submerged her reason she was beside herself, the weakness and
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: the dizzyness were forgotten. She went down the steps quickly,
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: her eyes flashing, her bosom heaving. Her bloodless lips set
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: together firmly. As she reached the sidewalk, a figure separated
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: from a group of young men who were apparently loafers,
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: and came beside her. Mister tom Betterly had been awaiting her.
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: She could say nothing just then, but she turned upon
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: him a look of contempt that should have warned him.
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: But it would have taken something far more powerful than
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: any look to have warned mister tom Betterly on that occasion, Regina,
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: he said, speaking with that difficulty in pronouncing clearly which
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: we sometimes notice in those who have just come from
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: the chair of a dentist. Regina, he continued, and there
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: was a beastly light in his eye. I congratulated you.
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: I heard you. One diamond ring? Is that so? He
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: saw it on her finger? Ah, that's right. Then, opening
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: his mouth, he wore, caw, caw, caw. It was a
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: fearsome sound. Mister Thomas was rejoicing after the manner of
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: his kind went in his loose toothed condition he had
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: never before been quite so tipsy in Regina's presence, as
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: with a mighty force of brazen mouth and iron lungs,
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: he croaked forth. Third call, he attempted to put his
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: arm around her waist. Then his arm as it touched
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: the girl, and she drew back, remained fixed as though paralyzed.
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: The blazing eyes of Regina had caught and almost sobered him. Go,
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: she hissed, Go, I never want to see you again, you,
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: you wretch. He stood there while she went on, and
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: he knew that so far as she was concerned, it
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: was all over with him forever. End of chapter five,
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: Chapter six of but Thy Love and Thy Grace by
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: Francis J. Finn S Jay. This liprivox recording is in
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  Speaker 1: the public domain recording by Maria Therese, Chapter six. The
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  Speaker 1: force of habit is something wonderful. Blinded with rage, carried
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: away by her feelings, so that she was no longer
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  Speaker 1: a reasonable being, Regina nevertheless turned. When she came to
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  Speaker 1: the parish church and entered it. She had no intention
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: whatever a stopping, no intention of entering. All the same.
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  Speaker 1: She did both for years. It had been her pious
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  Speaker 1: custom never to pass the church without paying a short
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  Speaker 1: visit to the prisoner of Love, living his hidden life
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  Speaker 1: in the tabernacle out of love for ungrateful men. When
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  Speaker 1: Regina came to realize where she was, she found herself
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  Speaker 1: kneeling in a pew far up the knave, before the
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  Speaker 1: statue of the meek and lowly Savior, exposing to her
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  Speaker 1: and to all who visited him, his most sacred and
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  Speaker 1: adorable heart. Oh why am I here? Why am I here?
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: She moaned, I cannot pray, I cannot look at him now,
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  Speaker 1: God help me. Her feelings were in an angry wirl.
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: She was indeed beside herself. She could not collect her thoughts.
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  Speaker 1: She could not even kneel and sank back upon the bench,
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  Speaker 1: burying her face in her hands. Oh, if she could
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  Speaker 1: but drive the black hatred and the black bitterness out
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  Speaker 1: of her heart, if she could but turn her thoughts
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  Speaker 1: from that awful disillusionment. No, no, it is impossible. I
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  Speaker 1: shall not be able to pray again for a long
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: long time. Oh God, I am a sinner to think
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: that I went to Holy Communion only yesterday. Oh God, Oh,
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: say have mercy upon me, a sinner. It belongs to God,
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  Speaker 1: our Lord alone. Sustaining nacious in his spiritual exercises, to
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  Speaker 1: grant consolation to the soul without any proceeding cause for it,
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  Speaker 1: because it belongs to the Creator alone to go in
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  Speaker 1: and out of the soul, to excite motions in it,
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  Speaker 1: attracting it entirely to the love of His Divine Majesty.
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  Speaker 1: I say without cause, that is, without any previous perception
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  Speaker 1: or knowledge of any object from which such consolation might
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  Speaker 1: come to the soul by means of its own act,
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  Speaker 1: of the understanding or will. This principle had never been
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: expounded to poor Regina. But then and there she learned
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  Speaker 1: it truth experimentally. She fell upon her knees. Peace be still,
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  Speaker 1: said Christ, to the storm, and forthwith there was a
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  Speaker 1: great calm. Tears sprang to the girl's eyes, great tears
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  Speaker 1: of love and of peace in her soul. She saw
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  Speaker 1: our Lord, and seeing him, her heart grew glad and
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  Speaker 1: brave and strong with the burning love himself had enkindled.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: After the storm had come the calm, after the darkness
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: of great light, after sin and passion, pardon and peace
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: after hatred, love and forgiveness, after man Christ himself. When
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: Regina loved the church half an hour later, her face
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: was sweet and radiant. She had gone one step further
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: in renunciation, and had with a fervor to her altogether
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: new and wonderful, said that sacred prayer. Take, O Lord,
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 1: and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: my whole will, whatever I have and possess. Thou hast
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: given me these things, O Lord, to thee. O Lord,
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: do I return them, received them, disposed of them according
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 1: to the extent of Thy will. Give me but thy
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: love and thy grace, for these are sufficient from me
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 1: d of Chapter six. Chapter seven of but thy Love
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: and Thy Grace by Francis Jay Finn asked Jay. This
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 1: LibriVox recording is in the public domain recording by Maria Therese,
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: Chapter seven. When Regina reached her room, she lighted the
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: candle and composed herself to make her spiritual reading. For
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: some weeks past, she had been reading the life of
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: Saint Jean Francis de Chantal by the Abbe Bouguarde. Only
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: the night before she had come upon a pretty story
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: of how Christ had almost literally forced a young girl
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: to love him. She had been led onward by the
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: path of renunciation. When Regina read it. The narrative had
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: appealed to her as being pretty and touching, but now
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: looking back it haunted her. She thought in her soul
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: that she had not got out of it all the
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: meaning that there was, perhaps in it's a message for herself.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: She turned back a few pages and again, and with
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: other eyes, read this account of the hard one's spouse
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: of Christ. But of all whom the grace of God
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: snatched from the world in spite of themselves, none so
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: obstinately resisted at first, or so generously submitted when vanquished.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: As Marie Marguerite Michael. She belonged to a wealthy family
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: of Franche Comte, and like many other young girls, her
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  Speaker 1: danger light in her beauty. One night, it seemed to her,
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: in sleep that a child clothed in white perched and
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: scratched her face, saying, you will now be much more
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: beautiful in the eyes of your spouse. Marie Marguerite awoke,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 1: screaming and insisting that the skin had been torn from
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: her face. Her mother, finding nothing the matter with her face,
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: treated her as a silly dreamer and bade her go
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: to sleep again. Two days later, Marguerite was attacked by
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: the smallpox, and her face did indeed become disfigured. But
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: she still possessed so many means of pleasing the world,
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 1: and she was still so witty, lively, graceful, so accomplished,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: and every way that she thought not of abandoning her
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: life of pleasure and dissipation. One day, while resting after
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: a grand ball, there suddenly appeared before her the same
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: child that has scratched her face. He seemed irritated. You
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: are going too far, he said, I know how to
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: put a stop to the man extravagance of your youth.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: And taking hold of her feet, he crushed them so
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: severely that she screamed aloud. Shortly after, she fell and
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: hurt her foot so seriously that despite all remedies, she
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: was lame for the rest of her life. On the
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: fourth day after this accident, as she was crying and grieving,
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: the child again appeared, but this time radiant with light.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: Marguerite was frightened and hid her head under the bed covering.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: I told you, said the child, smiling, that I would
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: succeed in putting a stop to the follies of your youth.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: Give your heart to God now, since your body is disfigured,
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: Marguerite tried to obey. It was, in fact, on the
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 1: bed of Paine, where she lay for six weeks, that
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: she learned to pray, and that her soul began to
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: relish heavenly things. Nature, however, was far from being conquered.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 1: One day, in the early part of her convalescence, she
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: chanced to see herself in a mirror, her disfigured face
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: and crippled figure. It brought tears to her eyes. At
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 1: the same instant, the child again appeared, holding a veil
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 1: upon which the figure of Jesus dying was depicted. Ah
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: what is that, exclaimed Marguerite. It is the lover of
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: your soul, answered the child. See to what love has
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: reduced him. Marguerite's heart was touched by these words, and
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 1: from that time she loved her deformity and would not
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: exchange it for all the advantages the world could offer.
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: She went to Saint Francis the Sales resolved to become
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: a religious but a little embarrassed because her family, opposed
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 1: to her design, would not give her a dowry. Ah, well,
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: said the saint. If you have nothing, we want nothing.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: Offered these two things to God and go tell Mother
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 1: de Chantelle that she may receive you for nothing. The
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: Holy Foundress received her with joy, and the saintly Bishop
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 1: himself deigned to give her the habit. Her novitiate was
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: noted for her sacrifices in her life, for the numerous
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: and admirable foundations she conducted. Saint Franciscis Sailes used to say, ah,
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 1: how well this cripple walks. The cripple indeed governed the
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: comment of ballets. De Jean Rossail and Ronne, founded those
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: of Vessinclon, Dull Gray Selens, and Solaire arranged the foundations
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: of Fribourg, Plaissance, Milan and Munich Bavaria. And if this
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 1: cripple had lived one year longer, she would have carried
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 1: the visitation to Canada. The simple girl, as she read
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: these words, failed to make any comparison between herself and
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: the high born lady. And still, when she laid the
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 1: book down, they came to her of a sudden the
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 1: thought that perhaps the Dimi Ring, which she still strangely loved,
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: was not for her. It is all I have left,
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: she murmured to herself, and she gazed upon the twinkling splendor,
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: the only toy that had ever brightened her life? Yet,
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: why should I give it up? The door opened slightly,
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: and a voice what that was heard to say? May
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: I come in? Regina? The girl started, then, recovering herself,
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 1: arose and answered, why, certainly, Missus Stevens, just look at
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: what I've won. Missus Stevens entered her pleasant smile right
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 1: in the poor room. Oh isn't it beautiful, she exclaimed,
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 1: catching Regina's finger. And so you want it after all? Yes,
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  Speaker 1: I was very lucky, wasn't I Yes, my dear, and
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: I'm so glad you want it. I hope that it
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: will bring a little more joy and pleasure into your life.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: I often envy you, Missus Stevens. You are always so
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 1: cheerful and light hearted, and when Rose died, you did
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: so much for me without news knowing it by your
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: pleasant ways. You was always like sunshine. When you came
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: into my room, and Regina broke off in the middle
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 1: of a sentence, Missus Stevens had suddenly sunk into a chair,
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: and all the sunshine and brightness were gone. Why why,
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: what's the matter for? Answered Missus Stevens began to sob dear, dear.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: I didn't say anything to hurt your feelings, did I?
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: But the sobbing woman was unable to make any reply.
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: Regina waited in distress till the first violent emotion had subsided. Surely,
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 1: Missus Stevens, I have said nothing to hurt you, have I.
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: The woman wiped her eyes and for a few seconds
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: held her handkerchief over her face. When she looked up again,
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 1: she wore her calm, smiling expression as before. Excuse me,
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: she said, I'm a bit nervous to night. Please don't
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: mind what's just happened, Regina. I I lost control of myself. Regina, meanwhile,
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: had been closely scanning the other's features. For the first time,
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 1: she perceived that Missus stephens smile was a mask. There
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: were lines of care and suffering upon the cheeks, and
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 1: an expression almost of agony lurking in the eyes. Missus Stevens,
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: she said, putting her arm around the woman's neck, Please
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 1: tell me the truth. You have some great trouble. Missus
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 1: Stevens melted under the kindness again. Her features twitched convulsively.
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 1: Again she broke into sobs. Don't cry, please, said Virgina gently,
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 1: I'm half starved, said the woman abruptly. What and my
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: six son is going into typhoid, I believe, And the
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: older boy is out of work, and the children have
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 1: eaten the last bite we have. Dear, dear, cried Regina,
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: I spent my last cent to day. I'm afraid to
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 1: call for doctor. There's nothing coming. Oh why didn't God
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: take me when he took my husband, Regina, I shall
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 1: go mad. No, no, don't speak that way. Please, when
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: the shops opened again in a few weeks, my boy
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: will be working, but it will be too late unless
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 1: I go begging. I pawned everything that will sell. Please
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: take this, said Regina. You can't refuse it, and get
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 1: your little ones and yourself something to eat. Regina held
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 1: out a dollar to the woman, who first drank from it,
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 1: then clutched it, oh so greedily. The truth of her
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: story was evidence in the act. God bless you, but
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 1: it's hard to take it. Good Bye, my dear. When
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: missus Stevens had gone, Regina put on her wraps and
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: hastened down the stairs. She took off the diamond ring
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: in her descent, sighing as she did so. It was
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 1: hers no longer end of chapter seven Chapter eight of
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 1: but Thy Love and Thy Grace by Francis J. Fennas Jay.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 1: This LibriVox recording is in the public domain recording by
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: Maria Teres. Chapter eight. Mister Fairweather, seated at his desk
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 1: in the library of his house, was not a little
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 1: astonished when the maid informed him that a young lady
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 1: wished to see him. One moment, he said, and finished
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 1: the letter he was writing. Now please show her in.
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 1: He resumed, suppressing his surprise. When Regina O'Connell entered, he
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: arose and greeted her cordially. You are welcome, he said,
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 1: with his engaging smile. You must excuse me, sir, for
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: coming at such an hour of the night. But I
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 1: thought I ought to come, Sir. I want to sell
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: that diamond ring at once. I have need for the money.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: Regina had no intention of telling him for what purpose
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 1: the money was needed, but, yielding gradually to the kind
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 1: manner of the old gentleman, she told the whole story.
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: Miss O'Connell. He said, I will buy the ring and
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: pay for it too, on two conditions, Yes, sir, said
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: Regina interrogatively. The first is that you keep three fourths
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: of the money for yourself, Regina was about to object.
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: Now listen, the second is that you allow me to
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: help you in this work of real charity. Oh, thank you, sir.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: I shall never forget your kindness. Mister Fairwether pressed an
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 1: electric button. Get the carriage at once, he said to
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: the answering maid. I will see to the doctor. He
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: went on, and that other voy shall have work within
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: a week if I have to create a job for him.
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 1: And now he added, taking out a pocket book, I
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 1: think I can pay you in cash. Ah, yes, he
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 1: went on, as he passed the number bilth through his fingers.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 1: Here we are five twenties. That's all right, isn't it.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: It did not occur to Regina in her excitement that
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 1: five twenties were equal to one hundred dollars. Yes, sir,
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 1: I'm sure it is all right. Very good. Give one
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: of those twenties to missus Stevens, my dear young lady,
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: and keep the rest for yourself against a rainy day.
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: Thank you, sir, you are so good. I hope I
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: have not disturbed you, not at all, not at all.
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: And now we see it for a moment, and excuse
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: me while I go to the telephone. I shall come
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 1: back presently. He was gone for several minutes. When he returned,
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 1: he said, my doctor Wolf is the sick boy at once.
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: And now, my dear young lady, you look very pale
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: and tired. Is there anything I could offer you? A
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: cup of coffee or or no? Thank you, sir, I
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: am not used to taking anything at night. The carriage
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 1: is ready, sir announced the maid. Very good, miss O'Connell.
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: It is late for you to be out alone. You
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: must go home in my carriage. Regina could say nothing.
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 1: Good bye, he said a moment later, as he helped
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 1: her into the carriage. I am very glad to have
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: met you. Indeed, please to pray for an old sinner.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 1: It was Regina's first carriage ride. End of chapter eight,
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 1: chapter nine of but Thy Love and Thy Grace by
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: Francis Jay Finn asked Jay. This LibriVox recording is in
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 1: the public domain. Recording by Maria Therese. Chapter nine. Regina
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: started blithely up the Paris stairs. It led to her rooms,
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: but her pace became perceptibly slower as she neared the
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 1: first landing. On reaching it, she paused to get her
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: breath as she stood there. All the events of the
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: last few hours came back in a panorama. The crowd,
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: the lights, the winning of the ring, the loss of
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: her lover, the visit to the church, the spiritual reading
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 1: Miss Stevens's story, the interview with mister Fairweather. Her first
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: carry dried, and now the ring was gone, her first
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: and last toy. Dear, dear, she gasped. It seems years
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 1: since I won that ring, years and years since I
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 1: left the hall. I must have lived half my life
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: to night, and indeed she had. Then she toiled painfully,
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: laboriously up to the next landing, where she paused again.
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 1: Regina was utterly worn out. It was, in very truth,
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 1: a long long time since she won the diamond ring,
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 1: and she needed rest, sorely, sorely. She started up for
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 1: the last landing, when, having made but a few steps,
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 1: she was seized with a violent fit of coughing. When
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 1: she took her handkerchief from her lips, it was stained
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 1: with blood. She looked at it in the dim light,
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: and suddenly grew very faint and dizzy. She swayed and tottered.
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 1: Hullo cried a voice at her ear, though to her
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: it sounded far away. What's the matter, my girl? Let
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: me help you. The man, apparently a doctor who thus
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: addressed her, was on his way downstairs, and reached the
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 1: fainting girl in time to prevent her from falling with
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 1: little difficulty. She was very light. He helped her up
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 1: to her room. Missus Stevens, who had heard them without,
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 1: showed him the way. Here here, said Regina, faintly, reaching
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 1: out her hand to missus Stevens. It was a twenty
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 1: dollar bill. The doctor, meanwhile, had taken Regina's handkerchief and
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: brought it over to the light arterial. He murmured to himself.
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 1: He approached the bed upon which Missus Stevens had laid Regina,
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 1: and made a hurried to be careful examination of the
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 1: new patient. Is she very ill? Asked missus Stevens. I
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: should say that, in all probability she has been very
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: ill for many months. And so this is the girl
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: who won the diamond. How did you know that, sir,
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: cried missus Stevens. Mister Fairweather telephoned me the whole thing.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 1: The ring is gone, missus Stevens observed. The doctor glanced
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 1: at Regina. Her eyes were closed. She seemed to be asleep.
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 1: Yes it is gone, he sent it. But she will
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 1: never need it, poor child. But Regina was not asleep.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 1: She heard every word, and she understood, yes, she would
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 1: never need it. Then her heart rose to her best beloved,
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 1: to him who had brought her safely along the thorny path.
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 1: Give me but thy love and thy grace, she whispered,
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 1: for these are sufficient for me, but thy love and
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: thy grace. But thy love, thy grace. And she received
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 1: his love and his grace, and in the receiving her
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: heart throbbed with a bliss seldom known upon earth. For
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 1: his love and his grace were indeed sufficient. End of
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 1: Chapter nine and of but thy love and thy Grace
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: by Francis J. Finn As J.