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Episode 3: The Tush Push · The Tom & Gerry Show Podcast

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I there's the summer, now, Tom, that's it. That's the summer.
1:07
No messing about that now. I had to put the planes all the
1:10
way down so I could see you. I know, I have a lovely
1:12
reddish glow. I'm not sunburnt to people. I just was in the cold
1:17
environment today and I bust out into the heat and it's after my Irish skin.
1:22
It is screaming at me now. So I'm glad to be in the
1:26
podcast studio, Jerry talking to you, to be honest with I am.
1:29
On the other hand, Tom, I'm very sunburned. I'm terribly sorry.
1:32
First rays sun hit me. I just went out and got absolutely roasted.
1:34
But I'll tell you, we had a beautiful weekend the first rays of sunshine
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came to us. And whereas I gotta tell you, Tom, I wasn't
1:42
stereotypical about it. I didn't immediately start mowing the lawn, did you not.
1:48
But what I did immediately start doing, Tom, was fixing the lawn
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moreh well, yeah, yeah, yeah, flick it over on the footpath.
1:55
Did you pull the spark plug is electric? Or pull? It's an
1:57
electric Tim of what I did was I snapped the blade on it. And
2:02
now it takes a peculiar type of ignorance to snap a blade on a lawnmar
2:06
but here I am right. So I got a replacement blade, lovely stuff,
2:10
and I was like, okay, I must get that into it.
2:13
And then all of a sudden sunshine, right, okay, come on,
2:15
let's do it, and turned it over and I found that I could not
2:19
because to get how he's all doing. By the way, welcome along to
2:22
the Tom and Jerry Show, lest we forget. I'm Jerry McBride and that's
2:28
Tom. O'Mahoney over there. You're very welcome along to this week's episode.
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We started at a gallop there, so we did. You're just very excited
2:35
and I understand it. I understand. Yeah, you had to scrape off
2:38
the dried out grass some last year, yeah, two years. Did you
2:43
put a vite scripts on the old blade? And then just the problem,
2:46
Tom, there was no old blade to put it onto it because the old
2:49
blade had completely snapped off what so, so it snapped in half. Yeah,
2:53
but so there was no blade left inside the bolt at all. No,
2:58
you aren't ignorant us I will. There's a phrase that go that is
3:01
known, and it was said to me all through my childhood. You would
3:04
break a fucking iron, and by God you did. Guilty is charged.
3:08
As we say up airway, you'd hoop a crowbar in a bog. I
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do love that one. I do love that one. Yeah, yeah,
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no, I snapped it off completely. And for those unfamiliar with lawnmower repair,
3:20
when you put the socket on the nut that holds the blade in,
3:23
you're supposed to hold the blade and that will give you the purchase to turn
3:27
it. But with no blade, as I turn the nut, the thing
3:30
just keeps spinning and I'm out of options here, Tombs, there's nothing to
3:32
grab it with the grip branches. It's too small for a grip branches.
3:36
So I had to go up to our local tool depository and by myself a
3:40
pair of needle nosed vice scripts tom which I did not have in my tool
3:45
chest, and I'm like, look, this will either fix the lawnmowar or
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I will have a pair of needle nose vice gripts. Yeah, did you
3:52
fix the lawnmore? No, but I have a pair of needle nose vice
3:53
gripts which you will never use, never use again, but I use them
3:59
nest time you that much. No, that things, that things for the
4:01
for the things. I'm terribly sorry, but you're all very welcome along to
4:05
the show, Tom, did you have as an event as event full of
4:11
weekend as that as I as easy for you to say, I did.
4:14
I did what every Irish person should have done, and I don't get to
4:16
do enough. I gigged on Friday night down at the beautiful Don Garvin.
4:19
But then I got drunk afterwards. That's the style. Yeah I did.
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I was so caught up in the heat and the fun and everything and all
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the rest of it. And I got to meet I got to hang out
4:30
with the fantastic ever from that fantastic theode okay, and we went met More
4:35
dun for friend of the podcast, friend of the podcast. Yes, met
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More Dunford of Vikings Fame okay, and hung out and we had a lovely
4:46
time in on Garvan and yeah I got him. But you know what I
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did, Jerry, I did something very mature. I knew when I had
4:54
enough, which is quite a turning point. In my life, I can
4:57
tell you it's a that's a lesson hard learned. I'll tell you that much.
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Well. I knew I was going to be in Cleaned the following night
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with Neil Delamer, so you know, there you go, there you go.
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Well, you know, spare talk for your brother over here wrestling with
5:10
a lawn or while you're having great crack, regardless of which, Harry is
5:15
all keeping. We're going to launch into the show here this week one.
5:17
As everybody knows now, we start each show where we look at the week's
5:20
big noise, Tom the Brew haha, the talk of the town, weekly,
5:25
what have you? This is a very complicated case, mad, You
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know, a lot of ian's, a lot of outs, a lot of
5:30
what have you, and uh, a lot of strands to keep in my
5:33
head man, lovely right, the weekly what have you? You? We
5:39
like this has been on the tip of my brain to even just sit down
5:43
and talk to you, because whens soon as you mentioned him, like,
5:46
how does McBride know the inside of my head? This is it's it's because
5:50
we are basically the same person and media goes after us exactly the same.
5:56
And as soon as you said it, I went yeah, because I saw
5:59
this coming about two years ago. This is the This is like the big
6:03
short where people kind of saw it common and trade against it. Tom saw
6:09
this coming a couple of years ago and wanted to do an episode on it,
6:13
and it just never it just never came to get together. But now
6:16
it is upon us, Tom. The tsunami is about to hit the shore.
6:19
And I give you a clue, a telltale point if people want to
6:25
pause and guess what are the lads on about? If we haven't written in
6:27
this description. I cut my mullet off around the time I had enough,
6:33
because my mullet would have been tied in with the notion of this kind of
6:36
carry on and whatnot and everything else. I got my mulled off, damn
6:40
near two a year and a bit ago now at this stage, and I
6:43
just I said, Jerry, this is getting out hunt this give it to
6:46
them. Tom. What are we talking about? We are talking about,
6:48
Well, it's it's now spun up to nuclear level, because it's gone all
6:53
the way to Queen Bee. But it is it's the resurgence of well heavy,
6:58
heavy amounts of all things country that is going on worldwide at the minute.
7:02
And I we are both country fans people that knows, and a lot
7:08
of people are long term with us. You'll know that we are country fans,
7:10
but we're more of a kind of Willie Jennings Willie Nelson singing about your
7:15
dog and you know, bits of your body falling off during hard you know,
7:21
Horsey sessions and whatnot. But it has spun up into something absolutely out
7:26
of control that can be only like everything comes in a secular Jerry, I
7:30
was in Wexford this time circle. I was in Wexford this time last year,
7:34
about to drive up to do a gig, and I saw three girls,
7:38
four girls, a biggy pardon that could only be described as Spice girl
7:44
esque in what they're wearing. I had to double look. I was expecting
7:46
to see like a yellow I FI had punto somewhere. I says, is
7:49
this nineteen ninety four or what is happening? Because everything, all these girls
7:55
were exactly looked like the Spice Girls, And this is exactly what's happening again
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everything, what does it? Tom give it to them? What is it?
8:03
It's line dancing, Jerry. I knew just line dancing. I knew
8:05
just coming when I started watching Yellowstone two and a half years ago, I
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said, this is too cool of a show that the world won't catch on.
8:13
Kevin Costner is to blame for line dancing. I'm just saying, Hevin
8:16
Costner, this is indeed, ladies and gentlemen, the resurgence of line dancing
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in recent times, as as popped out of us with an article that we've
8:26
seen. We're like, oh, holy crap, it is back. Line
8:28
dancing is back. They're attributing, as Tom said there to Queen Bee Beyonce
8:33
herself with the release of her Cowboy Carter album Tom, which I had to
8:37
listen to, and I am not a fan. We're not going to get
8:41
too deep into that water. But it ain't. It ain't my breed of
8:45
country. But to all those that like it, may or God go with
8:48
you. How can you have a country album? Tom, and not mentioned
8:52
your dog dying? Not once, I'm sorry, not once. Not one
8:54
dead dog in that whole album. Sorry. No, no falling out with
8:58
the neighbors, no nothing, no heavy drinking, nothing does at no point
9:03
does she At no point is there a song where at the start of it
9:05
she buys a gun and at the end of it she shoots someone. So
9:11
just follow the Randy Travis model. There'll be sadness throughout. Blood should be
9:15
running out of your Bluetooth speaker. As you listen to a proper country sound,
9:18
you should be inspired to go get a big erron on your hip.
9:22
But regardless of which it is country, apparently, going getting your lexus and
9:28
throwing your keys up is oh my god. If I didn't think she had
9:33
to pander for a few pounds to be honest, honestly, I think it's
9:35
just like it's it's just hoovering up the last remnants of money, Like what
9:39
have I not got? It's gonna be the opera next, it's gonna be
9:41
the Beyonce opera album. Just yes, anybody that was on the fence before,
9:46
well we got the opera fans as well. But Tom, it has
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brought with it the line dancing. What you said was bubbling under all these
9:54
years, and now it is back, Tom the boot scutin the pushing it's
9:58
line dance. People don't know there were people born and reared in a line
10:05
dancing free world, but we are the ones that were at the precipice of
10:07
it back in the early nineties, and here it is time as a flat
10:13
circle coming back at us again. Tom, I gotta ask you a question.
10:16
I know what you're gonna ask me, And you can't ask you a
10:18
question. You know, sometimes you know the answer before you ask these things.
10:22
Did you line dance back in the day? What do you reckon?
10:24
Jerry? Absolutely, without a shadow of doubt you line dancing class. I
10:30
didn't. I didn't be and I but here's the thing. I didn't see
10:33
anything wrong with it at the time, because of course Garth Brooks was to
10:35
blame at the time, because he was you know what I mean, he
10:39
was and he still is Garth Brooks. And at least he has you know
10:43
what I mean, You could say, okay, well, if he's taken
10:45
it to the masses, then fair enough. But I think it would have
10:48
been in Ireland anyway. The countributes the thing, and he's made he made
10:50
it a global popular genre. But like and he it was lind Dancy tunes
10:56
and I don't I don't think line danson ever went to in some parts of
11:00
the world, no more than I reckon it was like river dance was you
11:05
know, hot ship when river dance was out, But it's not like Irish
11:07
dancing hasn't always been there, yes, yes, yeah, yeah yeah yeah
11:11
I didn't. And I remember watching on one time and I just couldn't bring
11:16
myself to doing that. It was at the local sports complex and I was
11:20
there to play some sport and I remember looking over the balcony, this long
11:24
balcony as these sports and there was must have been an entire basketball court.
11:30
That's that came to me as soon as we started talking about it. I
11:31
was like, you could, like six months ago, you couldn't have filled
11:35
a postage now, but the amount of people that would have wanted the line
11:39
dance out in public. This was a full basketball court with maybe only four
11:43
feet between each people. Whatever a step is, do you know whatever that
11:46
is in a meter? I don't know the army you gotta hold your arm,
11:52
You're not I know what the distances you're supposed to keep because but it
11:56
was amazing to watch because people were stepping on each other ankles Tipperary, people
12:00
that would seem are better at hurling than they are. It's amazing. It's
12:05
amazing to me. Tom, like that's a real Billy Elliott scene. There
12:07
of Tom up front and weights upstairs in the gym looking down lovingly at all
12:13
these people dancing, wishing he was down there instead he has to lie under
12:16
the metal. I'm gonna ask you a question, buddy, Yeah, really
12:20
you may be qualified to answer and score. Not my simplicity over here,
12:24
buddy, All right, okay, what is lying dance? Let me let
12:31
me let me let me pull that out a little bit, okay, like
12:35
was it a new thing with the guard books craze or was it always a
12:41
form of country dancing? What I'm basically saying to you is, did somebody
12:45
invent it? Is a tibo for country? Do you know what? That's
12:48
a great because tibo was Yes, Billy Blanks combined was dancing, the rose
12:56
was boxing, and Billy Blanks just put it together, you know, I
13:00
imagine was was did someone sit down and go Hang on a second, I
13:03
can see the dancing they're doing over there, So what if we made a
13:07
formation and oh and line dancing was born? Well da civil war? Think
13:15
about what you're watching your and I think if we go back even further,
13:18
I now I should ask my mother and two sisters who went to that line
13:22
dancing classes, as I remember as a child. But yes, Irelanders blame
13:28
for an awful lot of country music and country and western things as we talked
13:33
about before, like you know, the idea of the hillbilly is leaving and
13:37
the little southern drawl and all the rest of it. And if you look
13:39
at what you're looking at, Olive done is kind of cowboy moves with their
13:43
you know, your thumbs and your loops on your belt and showing your heels.
13:46
But they're line dancing, which is essentially the Siege of Venice, which
13:50
is essentially set dancing. It is set dancing, set dancing through a filter,
13:56
Yeah, through a filter of denim and check shirts, you know what
14:00
I mean? So I reckon, So maybe you know, we can we
14:03
can throw it up to the listeners because I'm not locking this up. You
14:05
know. Was it the case that at the box socials of the day back
14:13
in the Civil War, that there was some form of square dancing, which
14:16
I understand was a cowboy term, and then the Irish came in and between
14:20
the two it became line dancing, and then Garbrooks hits in the nineties and
14:26
then it's a big thing now, charact here's the open. Is it going
14:31
to explode again? Like like it's are we too far gone? Are we
14:35
too far out of the realm of the youth, the youth in it to
14:39
know that kids are kids like seventeen eighteen year olds? Are they line dancing?
14:45
Because I know Jivant is hot up the north, but are kids doing
14:50
it here in Ireland? Are they going out on a Friday evening to go,
14:54
let's go line dancing in the local you know what I mean? Are
14:58
they? I know, I don't know. It's on every associates. It's
15:03
again because according to the report that we read in this week's weekly what have
15:07
you it had? You can't drive one hundred yards down the road in the
15:11
States with a encountering a line dancing. When you're getting posts Malone now doing
15:16
country you know what I mean, They're all given it a go, like
15:20
before you know, Scooter is going to be doing a country album, like
15:24
it's Scooter back in Tennessee. But there's fit like I'm seeing fitness line dancing.
15:37
There's well, I mean, there's fitness everything. There's fitness, goat
15:39
fitness and never put there's fitness line dancing. It's all over my social media
15:43
from the States, and I'm wondering will it take off here in Ireland.
15:46
I don't see why not because normally when it comes to anything country Ireland is
15:52
unashamed. And how they'll like, we're just waiting for it to happen.
15:56
Look at the Garbrooks phenomena. Do you know what I mean? It ain't
15:58
got us twice? He got us twice. He got us two times.
16:02
Tom, could have gotten us three times, could have gotten us fiers seven
16:04
times, depend on how much. But it just wasn't motivated to do so.
16:08
But there you go. That's our weekly. What have you for the
16:11
week? Beyonce herself, braving her work to the world by bringing line dancing
16:15
back to the good people. Are you line dancing at the minute? You
16:18
plan the line dance in the future? Lar know in the comments, Tom,
16:22
how do you feel about that? Let him have it? Let him
16:23
have it? Okay, So come here, Tom, We've forced for the
16:30
Tom and Jerry Show with this next segment. Yes, indeed, everybody will
16:33
know that at this stage we take a look at someone who stood out this
16:36
week, the type that when you're talking about them, you don't just say,
16:38
oh, yeah, you know, there's this lad, Tom, You
16:41
say, and then there's this lad. Now there's that guy. Well,
16:48
it's different this week, not because we're trying to balance the books or anything
16:52
like that, but we do. Just how it bounced. It just how
16:55
it bounce. We have this lad been this lady. Yeah, it it
17:00
just popped up like as that when it knows you're looking, when your phone
17:03
knows what you're looking for. It doesn't throw me anything of the normal.
17:07
It's the variety. It was a Brazilian woman. Now, I more than
17:10
anything, I want to kind of get get your opinion on this, because
17:14
I kind of liked it in all fairness, and I mean this one is
17:18
yeah, yeah, she was in a tough bind. This woman, a
17:21
Brazilian woman by the name of Erica. She was arrested after taking a corpse
17:25
to sign a bank loan that she knew was already dead. She wheeled her
17:29
lithargic looking uncle into Brazilian bank clerks. The sense something was a miss.
17:33
I don't think he's well, I mean, yeah, it was only it
17:38
was only a handy loan about three thousand dollars. But like that, suspicions
17:44
arose when she kind of forced the pen into the sixty eight year old's hand
17:48
and started to move it around weekend at Bernie's esque. I gotta tell you
17:53
one thing to call. I gotta tell you one thing. You described the
17:57
man as lithargic looking. It's lithargic. I didn't. This is the Guardian.
18:07
The lithargic looking is well, it's it's not how I would usually describe
18:12
a corpse. I've worked with a few lithargic look on lads. To be
18:17
honest with you, I'm a lethargic man on occasion myself. I gotta tell
18:19
you about this lady. And it's in real divisionaire Okay, So money might
18:25
be hard to come by, yes, okay, ah, And generally I
18:30
do enjoy a grift Tom Yeah, you know, but even I must draw
18:36
the line sometimes, or at least it will draw an exasperation out of me
18:40
where I have to go. Ah here, yeah, but that's why she's
18:44
this week's this lad like to that. That's what That's what you gotta do,
18:48
get your way onto the You have to go above and beyond. Literally,
18:56
you have to go beyond what is capable by mortal men. But here's
19:02
the man. Now she knows this about herself, is that she can go
19:06
there if needs be. But to be fair, Uncle Barney was only gone
19:10
two hours. He was only gone two hours, so to be fair that
19:15
he could have made the agreement over breakfast and then not made it to lunch.
19:18
Do you know what I mean? You're like, well, a deal's
19:21
a deal, uncie. We're going, we're going, let's pull this apart.
19:26
Okay. So this lady here, what was her name there, Erika
19:29
Vierra none Is. I want to say, you said it far more eloquence
19:37
than I would. I would have went. Let me let me know our
19:41
Brazilian listeners if I'm if I'm nailing that pronunciation. There, she wields her
19:48
let's as it is, Tom, her dead uncle, dead uncle, yeah,
19:53
into the bank and fills out a form which he has to then sign
19:57
and U it's it's it's it's ghoulish to watch. He is a dead man.
20:06
I can't say that enough. He is. I don't want to go
20:08
all Monty Python, but he has ceased to be yeah yeah, and she's
20:14
there, as you say, it's a forcing de pen into his hand as
20:17
sign and the staff are like, now, lads, now, like I
20:22
have to. I've I've worked in retail myself a couple of times, Tom,
20:27
and every now and then a customer will come in and they'll want to
20:30
paint their skirting board with creaso, yes, because varnish is too expensive and
20:36
you can't talk to them out of it. I'm like, that's going to
20:37
stink the house out and never ever, It's not like you paint it and
20:41
it smells for a day that you're gonna have a stink of creso in your
20:45
house forever whatever. Yeah, and they're not to be talked down from it.
20:48
Okay. So I know I'm not saying I know what it's like to
20:52
be a bank teller watching a dead man have a pen shoved into his hand.
20:56
But I feel her, I feel her field their situation. Yeah,
21:03
I get it, and they have a job to do, Jerry, But
21:06
banks have robbed themselves in the past. This is it. This is what
21:10
we get around. This is when you turn around and same as moon as,
21:12
you should not be. You should not be drawing down alone. Here's
21:15
the other thing, Tom, that's that's an important factor in all this.
21:18
She is not getting her dead uncle to sign his savings over to Yeah,
21:25
she's not stealing his money. Yeah, she's stealing the bank's money. Yeah,
21:30
And I kind of respect that kind of Jerry, kind of Jerry.
21:34
I want one respective I don't. I don't. I don't condone her methods,
21:41
but I like that she's not like, oh uncle, didn't you say
21:45
that you wanted to sign over your savings to me? Oh uncle, didn't
21:48
you say that you wanted to transfer whatever it is to me? It's like,
21:52
hey, uncle, you know, didn't you want to take out a
21:53
three grand loan even though you're sixty eight years and who's given her three grand
21:57
loan to a sixty eight year old man? Listen? He could what did
22:00
he fill in on the thing, like, you know, home improvements?
22:08
Maybe you could do a lot with your home for three and a half grand
22:11
or three grand or whatever it was. And maybe just all he wanted was
22:15
new wind the boards, who knows the look of them? He needed at
22:17
least a stairlift there you go. Look at I'm saying I when I read
22:22
it, and I immediately first off, because you hear these out stories when
22:25
somebody's passed or whatever and they're you know, somebody had been drawn their you
22:29
know, their pension for six months after or they make out that they said,
22:33
you know, they ad one they had signed that field over to me
22:34
and whatnot. Serick had done. None of this all she needed, much
22:40
like any guaranteur situation, you just need the presence of the guaranteur there,
22:44
really, do you know what I mean? And that's all she needed.
22:48
Uncie was going to be put to rest when the time was right, but
22:52
it was two hours after he passed. Chances sor he'd made an agreement before
22:56
that. And you have to remember too, Jerry, we're very precious about
22:59
these kind of things in the West, especially like when it comes to you
23:02
know, people passing and stuff in, especially when it comes to the desecration
23:06
of a corpse. Well, you see in I don't know, have you
23:11
ever seen the day of the Day in Mexico where they where they pulled Nana
23:15
out from behind the tomb and they clean her down and brush your hair and
23:18
put new clothes and might even put a fag in her mouth, our favorite
23:21
fag brand. Tom you're there. Like you say desecration, I say utilization
23:26
of them exactly. Here's the thing, Jerry, it's getting more from your
23:30
corpse and maximizing your dead uncle's potentially sounds like a great bank, like you
23:37
know, marketing spiel. Get more from your corpse when you a real,
23:41
real bank called the family. Even if we have passed, we don't know
23:47
what the money was for that or I haven't read what the money was for.
23:51
I mean, for all intents supportable, you know, for all we
23:53
know, Tomic could be well, we need to cover funeral costs. And
23:56
how better to cover funeral costs than to, you know, have the corpse
24:00
itself take out a loan that they can never repay and rip the bank off
24:03
for three grand. Again, ripping the bank off for three grand is not
24:07
what I'm sure about with this thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
24:10
yeah. I'm like, yeah, you got one. What can I
24:12
say? To be honest with you, Jerry, I'm in no way so
24:15
with this story whatsoever. In fact, to the point that I would want
24:19
you if I would be glad to know that if I counked out in front
24:26
of you, that you would wheel me in to go guarantee on the loan
24:30
weekend the Bernie's title. I would. I would. I'd love to know
24:34
that I was one last socker to socker to the man, even after stick
24:40
it to the guys, even after I've bought the farm. I'm telling you
24:44
now, I would love to hear like, I'd love to know if there
24:47
is an afterlife to look down and go about McBride. I don't want to.
24:52
I don't want to, like, you know, get investigated for conspiracy
24:55
to fraud or anything like that, Tom, But I will promise you that
24:57
I'll at least take your credit card and tap ship out of that glass.
25:00
No, I'm I'm done down for that one. I'm I'm just gonna say
25:06
to you, Tom, any drink at your after is going to be bought
25:08
by you can take. And I have no problem that. Whatso, oh
25:14
my god, why don't people do that? Tom? Why isn't that a
25:17
thing to be Yeah, it probably is a thing. Jar probably is a
25:19
thing to beep it is that? Not a thing? Have I invented?
25:23
Have I invented a whole new crime? I think? Well, if you
25:26
haven't, you've definitely gotten bored and gotten into bed with these kind of people
25:30
that do that kind of stuff. But the fact that it was off a
25:33
bank, and banks are scrupulous to themselves, they've taken tones against themselves,
25:37
and you know, and yeah, you know, so I didn't you know,
25:41
she didn't wheel them into George Bailey's building alone, And yeah, yeah,
25:47
defrauds some small town credit union of much needed funds. No, no,
25:51
okay, I mean like yeah, so so yeah, what is a
25:56
complicated case there that I'd love to hear the thoughts of our listeners on.
26:00
Maybe I wouldn't, Tom, I don't know anybody particularly ghoulish out there.
26:06
Anybody got any strong opinions one way or another on corps finance? What do
26:14
you even call this crime? I don't know, A misuse of a cadaver.
26:19
I don't know, like it to be like, well, actually you
26:22
know there, I hope that I will say that the Brazilian police know exactly
26:26
what it's called because the charger with fraud and desecration of a corpse, okay,
26:30
right, or just just like that, they didn't have to look far
26:34
into the book for what to charge. This woman was Yeah, well one
26:40
coup who begged her. He was like, he said, I've never come
26:44
across the the likes of this in my twenty two years as a cop.
26:49
He said. Visible signs of Rigamartis left no doubt in bricks, Yeah,
26:57
like visible signs of himly being dead. Like I would just like if you
27:03
are, if you have a sense of humor and your uncle, right,
27:06
and you're the uncle. You would love to know that you would be like
27:11
on a podcast being talked about in Ireland for let's I think that everybody the
27:18
world over would be glad glad? Do you know what I mean? You
27:22
know, to nip one off the bank? I will. I would love
27:26
to know that that I got one over and my mate got and you,
27:30
I don't know, A new a new snag fridge. You get one of
27:33
those for three grande? Yeah, get solar panels. I don't know.
27:41
I will tell you this much. It is unlikely in our lifetime that either
27:45
you or I will ever be wheeled into a bank to sign a loan while
27:49
we are dead. Hopefully not well, it definitely won't be in our lifetime
27:55
if we're straight. Yeah, I worded that wrong, But I'll tell you
27:57
what. There is a high chance of, and I know my luck,
28:02
there's a high chance of this go on. There's a high chance that I
28:06
will be in the queue for the bank behind the corpse. Yeah, I
28:11
will be the lad that's the next man behind. And whoever it is in
28:15
front of me is doing a little Thunderbirds action with this clearly dead person trying
28:19
to get them signed, and I'm like, fuck me, I have to
28:22
be back at work two o'clock only for the euro in the fucking ticket meter.
28:26
For fox sake, Double Park, Would you ever move on? What
28:32
has taken so long? How long does it take to fill a form?
28:36
He just put it in his hand. But do you know what I could
28:37
have been? Actually? If I was behind her with my temper, I
28:41
could have been part of this conspiracy because I would have forced it into his
28:45
hand as well. Depends signed it. Uncle, for Christ's sake, would
28:49
you just sign it? I would have added another corpse to the debtor's list.
28:56
Yeah, yeah, any rate? Oh my good god? How about
29:00
that? Tom? A divisive issue must be said, A divisive issue.
29:04
Looking forward to looking as they say, Tom, I'm looking forward to the
29:07
comments on Latin one. Wow, holy crap. We we kung food our
29:12
way through this week's episode, Tom, pretty zippy. I'm liking it.
29:17
I hope everybody's enjoying it. And not only that, Tom, You and
29:18
I we got to the end of the episode were out falling out about anything.
29:22
It's true we almost did. But I've got something to draw down with
29:26
you. Are you gonna start around? I'm not thinking of starting a row,
29:30
but I'm starting a row. Don't stop there, we go starting a
29:38
round and something. I look, I don't know where you stand on it.
29:42
I think you're I think you may be on the other side of expense.
29:45
I don't know. And I didn't know I was properly on the other
29:48
side of the fence until I talked about being out Friday evening and enjoying your
29:53
enjoying my drinks with like minded other people, i e. People of my
30:00
age and behavioral patterns and hobbies and interests and everything else, and dare I
30:04
say my age? Yes? Yeah, that was until yeah, what happened
30:15
to him? The group of people from I'm gonna say they're from the southeast
30:19
of the country somewhere, or the east of the country somewhere, I should
30:22
say they're in there got to be half nine, quarter to ten with their
30:29
kids, their kids, and it's not kids in the pub. Tom a
30:33
divisive issue and one that was flared up on Twitter there recently. It went
30:40
quite noisy with a guy posing outside a bar which had a sign pets Welcome
30:45
children not or words to that equivalente, and his tweet had the caption my
30:51
kind of pub a pub with dogs and no children, and people with children
30:55
took massive umbradge with this, Tom, Yeah I have I'm I'm a parent,
31:00
and there is no way there. Look, it's like we have once
31:04
upon a time where we were kids. Right, once upon we were actually
31:07
children. You were not invited into the lives of any adult at all because
31:15
what was the phrase children should be seen and not heard. Yes, and
31:18
it was very much that it was like, no, no, it's not
31:22
happened. Sure, we all got brought to the pub out of necessity with
31:25
red lemonade and crisps, but there was purely necessity at the time. And
31:30
it wasn't easy access to texting or whatsapping people to get babysitters. But you
31:36
weren't. You didn't have to involve your fucking kids and everything. But now
31:40
is people to us sweet suffered in Jesus Christ. And this is interesting,
31:44
Tom, this is a very interesting This is more you know, nuanced discussion
31:48
rather than all that here make er swinging round, all right? You know,
31:53
like as you said yourself, there you were a child in a pub
31:56
drinking red lemonade and eating crisps and dipping crisps in your red lemonade. Yeah,
32:01
wasn't that great? Rack? Didn't you enjoy that? Did the pub
32:05
not make money selling red lemonade and crisps? Right? Enough? But I'd
32:08
no business being there, and I don't fully know if my parents wanted me
32:13
even there. It was just out of necessity. I had to be there,
32:15
but it was it was about the only occurrence where you'd find them.
32:20
Now, there were some kids that were just left in the car or the
32:22
ven to play on the road. Yeah, yeah, that was oft and
32:25
often the case. But you weren't there to be You certainly weren't there to
32:30
be keep your parents company. Do you know what I mean? That you
32:34
weren't there because your parents thought, oh, you know, what'd be great
32:37
if we all hung out together as a family in the pub. That was
32:40
never the case. It was just purely Christ. We can't legally leave them.
32:45
Come on, we bring them on. Here's I'm gonna Earlier in the
32:46
episode time I asked you what was line dancing? Which seemed like a strange
32:51
question, but you know, just go whip me on. Okay. Yeah.
32:54
My question to you now is this, what is a pub? Oh
32:59
Jesus Christ, what is a pub? It's a public house. Right,
33:05
don't do that, now, don't do okay, and let me let me
33:07
let me dive into it a little bit more. Okay, Like when you
33:09
say children should not be in a pub, here's what I'm going to say,
33:15
children should not be in a bar? What what is? Where are
33:22
you putting them? If they're not in the lounge or lounge for lounge and
33:27
bar for barns. So if you're like on the session, if you're in
33:30
a pub to drink, that's your job, and you're an older person such
33:35
as you or a like you're in the bar, they're wrong. I mean
33:39
the I don't know. Here's what I'm going to say. Sure, here's
33:44
where I here's where I make the divide. Okay, I'm going to be
33:46
like, I'm not going to just say no kids in the pub, but
33:50
I will say no kids in the bar. Look right, and do the
33:54
kids go into the lounge and have you know, crisps and red lemonade.
34:00
Absolutely, I'll find the lunge in the bar are two very different places.
34:02
It can be easily easy looked at like this. You know when you go
34:06
to a restaurant and they bring down do you want some crayons? And some
34:08
yolks. Yeah, Jesus Christ, Tom, I haven't been like, I
34:12
haven't been to a restaurant where I wasn't given a menu and creons in ten
34:15
years. Yeah, So there are no particular reason where you have you ever
34:19
been in a pub where they serve you out to point the guinness and all
34:22
of a sudden they hand you out a color and pad and some crayons as
34:24
well. I haven't. They should though, No, they don't because it's
34:29
not to be done. It's not it's not to be done. It's acceptable
34:34
to bring your kids to so many things and involve them in everything. Now
34:37
you're every facet you have to involve them, which is absolutely fine. It's
34:42
not like it was a parent forty five years ago and now I'm a parent
34:45
again. I'm like, how did that happen? This is I'm a new
34:47
parent. I'm fine with it. I will say on a pointer, I
34:52
will say one thing, Tom. I will say one thing, Tom.
34:54
If you were in the pub there on Friday night and there was children in
34:57
there at half nine, like legally that's oh yeah, they had absolutely no
35:04
business and being there like and it was it was irresponsive, I mean,
35:07
irresponsible parent now, okay, if it's outside, it's a restaurant bar kind
35:12
of a scenario, and it's okay. You know, it's six thirteen,
35:15
and it's like, okay, we're all having food. This is fine,
35:16
this is grand. But there was an entire vibe of sessionhood in that pub.
35:22
Yes, and those kids had no business been among it. But they
35:25
were run running around throwing beer mats at each other. And these two assholes,
35:30
See that's great. A beer mat is like an is like a ninja
35:31
star. If I was a child, I would have loved that. Oh
35:34
listen, I could understand the child child's point of view. They were up
35:37
late. It was they were having the time in their life. It wasn't
35:39
the kids I was blaming. I'm looking at these two decades going I never
35:43
get to enjoy pines never Yeah, and now here you are just dumping your
35:50
regrets on our scenario. What in the name of all of this holy you?
35:53
These are these are these are vialid concerns. I'm gonna I'm gonna give
35:58
it to you on Front Street, buddy, I bring my children to the
36:02
to the local. I'm'm gonna lay out the scenario for Youre right, Okay,
36:07
stay on a Sunday, Okay, not every Sunday, right on the
36:12
occasional sunday, I'll take the kids down run about tea time. They'll get
36:15
saucy and chips. I'll get you know, a zero zero beverage or otherwise
36:22
I'll have like two pints. It's nice. We stayed there for like an
36:25
hour, hour and a half or thereabouts. We take the kids home.
36:28
They've scooted down to the pub and back. It's about a mile there and
36:30
back again, so they're tired, they're fed. They get home, it's
36:35
a Sunday, it's eight o'clock, bat and down and they conk out and
36:38
then I can have mighty and sit up and have a nice relax and eating
36:43
with the missus. Now that's decent, sounded right. That's fair. That's
36:49
fair because you made a kind of a restaurant out of it. You have
36:52
a wrangle on your kids. They're not running around kicking over stools, do
36:55
you know me? You know, like the the boat on a night,
37:00
Patsy, youn't hear you don't hear a peep out of them, you know
37:02
what I mean? And it's not like I said, I keep them there
37:06
until ten o'clock at night, and they love it, and I love it,
37:08
and I hope they look back on it fondly in years to come,
37:12
as I look back fondly on having red lemonade and crisps in a pub.
37:15
Although that was usually awake up some sorts. Yeah, that was the thing.
37:21
Yeah, when I think about it, it was rarely. You were
37:22
broad. Broad, you're broad because of the funeral. Yeah, it was
37:25
taking and after a funeral. No, Look, if you can, if
37:30
you can put a and do you know what fair play to a pub,
37:32
because there's loads of pubs. Fair play to that pub. We're going,
37:36
Yeah, bring your pets, but not your kids, because at least then
37:38
you can go people who don't have kids, or are want to break from
37:42
their kids or break for them anything, or they don't want to go in
37:45
there and then have to deal with everybody else's kid. Yes, great,
37:49
do you know what I mean? Put that up because the pub next door
37:51
might be delighted to have your kids. Do you know what I mean?
37:53
I do? I do think like a like for example, Tom, and
37:57
we're going to get off this real quick because I can't see as far in
38:00
an exactly common ground on this, but a pub of a Sunday would serve
38:06
cavarry dinner. So would you take your kids to a pub to get a
38:07
cavalry? I could, Yeah, I could do cavary dinner around three o'clock.
38:13
I can do that. But that's fine, that's good, that's fine.
38:15
But would you be okay to answer your question? A pub becomes a
38:17
pub jerry when there's nothing else but for drinking inside it, right, Yes,
38:22
if there's not, like you weren't getting even a package can be frized
38:27
the other night, I'd say inside in that place, let alone. You
38:30
know, I played assassins and chips for the games. No, that's it,
38:34
okay, So we might be cracking it here. Yes. If the
38:36
pub has more of a sort of family vibe, that has a lounge that
38:39
you can go down and sit and eat if you so wish, or maybe
38:43
just watch the football of a Sunday, that's fine. Don't take your kids
38:47
to the smoking area, is what I'm hearing. Yeah, exactly exactly,
38:51
Like if there's people spitting on the floor, don't have your kids there.
38:55
Yeah, yeah, take it take it on a taken on an establishment by
38:59
establishment base. It's like, you know, maybe exactly to the rough or
39:01
more spit friendly pubs. But it's not like a you know, a petro
39:07
station. We're like, well, we can get petrol in all these places.
39:08
It's not the same thing. It's a pub taken on a pub by
39:13
pub basis. Yes, do you know? Definitely? I think it's cool
39:15
that they let dogs in. How's that? I like that they let dogs.
39:20
I gotta tell you, I've been to some dog pubs, Tom,
39:22
and they talk a good game, but you know what they also do well,
39:25
smell of dog piss they do. Yeah, that's the only thing that
39:29
is the only thing about with respect. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If
39:31
it's not a flagstone floor, lads, don't ever. If you're a pub
39:35
owner right now, you don't have a flagstone floor that you can power wash
39:37
out on a fucking evening. It's not it's not dog friendly. It's not
39:40
dog friendly. There you go, There you go. Folks, do you
39:44
bring your children to the pub where your children conceived in a pub? Let
39:47
us know in the comments. Other than that, it's been another excellent episode
39:52
of The Tom and Jerry Show. If you're listening, keep doing so,
39:55
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