Latest / Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler / Ready to Rumble with Susie Essman

Transcript

Ready to Rumble with Susie Essman · Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi, Hi, Hi, Hi. What's going on? Chelsea? Catherine? Chelsea Here,
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Catherine here, Hi, It's nice to meet you.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Well, hello and goodbye because you're off to Spain.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Hey, estado, precticondo mi espanol, toto por semana. I am
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: in the thick of it. We be in Chelsea.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: You have been preparing for this for some time.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: A few months.
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: I feel like I feel like I've been pregnant or
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: something something like that. Drastic has happened to me. I'm
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: carrying a lot of weight on my shoulders and I'd
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: like to drop it. So that's what I'm going to do.
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: But I'm having a very Some of my niece and
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: nephews have arrived and we've already had some really good laughs.
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: So we're off to a good start. And my brother
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: is really a lot more fun without his wife. So
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: I'd like to make sure I put that out there
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: on record.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: I'll bet.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: So.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Have you been up the mountain yet on your e bike?
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: You know, I have sister, you know what. That's how
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: I test for COVID. I take a really long bike
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: ride and then if I feel better, it will feel
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: good after I'm like, all right, I must be I
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: must not be.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Set exactly a long bike ride and then you come
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: back and have a little apparel.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Spring surprise, surprise. We ran out of beer on the
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: very first day with my nephews, so they're clearly going
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: to cost me about ten thousand dollars just with alcohol.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: I'd rather give that to some charity, you know what
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: I mean?
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: Well, and how long is your drug stash going to
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: last this time? I mean you got to corrupt your
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: nieces and nephews somehow.
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: Oh, I have a supply for a long time, and
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: I have a drug dealer in Spain, so it's not
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: a problem. And now my Spanish is so good, I
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: can just get um if I need them.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Ooh, that's drug us, Master Goss, Is that what it is? Well,
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: let's talk about our very exciting guests we have today.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: Well always, it's always an exciting guest, and we always
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: say that because it is exciting, because otherwise they wouldn't
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: be here.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: We wouldn't be talking to people that didn't excite us.
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: Our guest today stars as the inimitable Susie Green on
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: Curb Your Enthusiasm. Please welcome actress and comedians Susie es
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: Men I'm sitting with Susie s Men, this is a
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: late stage marriage.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: That you You got married when you were fifty three
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: years old. Yeah, I met him at forty eight. Forty eight, OK,
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: I just want to follow this trajectory. Here's what I'll say. Now,
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I don't know you well at all, barely, but I
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: just know from what I've read, you've choose people that
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: I would never go out with, like at work, executives,
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: comedian rapper. Here's my theory. There's it's not my theory.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: It's like a known thing. There's the gardener, and there's
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: the flower. You're a flower. You need a fucking gardener.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: I do need a gardener. Yeah. And these high powered
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: guys they want to be flowered all the time. Like
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: most men, they want to deflower.
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: They want to deflower, and then they want to be
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: the flower exactly. But some high powered men are very
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: good at gardening because that's why they're in the position
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: in the first place. Like if they're an executive, they're
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: used to dealing with talent and they know how to
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: deal with like personalities a large person.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: There's still an ego.
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: Absolutely, Absolutely every person I've dated was a mistake.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so now we have to find you like a guy. Guy.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: Okay, I want to know about your guy. I want
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: to know you met him when you're forty eight.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Break it down. What happens? Okay, he was the brother
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: of We're good. It was a mosquito? Was it really
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: a mosquito? Because they love me? Man, they just eat?
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: What do you think this is on my forehead? Susie's
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: looking at a boulder. But I've noticed though, there used
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: to be no mosquitoes in La and now this mosquito.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: That's right, they're all be warming. I met him his
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: gay brother was one of my best friends, so we
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: had references. You need references. I don't sleep with his
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: gay brother ever. No, No, I'm not attracted to gay men.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: I like a man who, like you know, wants to
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: be with women's Yeah, you know, you can always tell
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: when a man is not into a woman's body. I know,
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: I know it's really disappointing.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: And I can also tell when you know how men
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: are supposed to be like butt men or boob men.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I'm boobs. I don't have a butt.
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: So when a man is a buttman with me, I'm
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: very confused because I think i'm like giving them this
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: great present, Like.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well you are looking at the gorge and they're.
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: Real, they're natural, they're up, they're ready to rumble. But
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: what's more interesting is that you are now a stepmother. Yeah,
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: I raised the kids for how long did you raise
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: those Well.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: I mean they were like when I met them, they
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: were ten, twelve, fourteen, fifteen. You know, now they're adults.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: Now they're thirty thirty three, thirty five, thirty six like that.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Now you know I had them for all those good
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: teen years. Oh yeah, I never wanted kids. I don't.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: I don't agree with it. I never wanted kids, and
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: I never you know, I mean I was the thing
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: about a relationship when you're a comedian, is I think
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: that men are intimidated by funny women. Yes, so you
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: need a really secure guy, right, and you need a
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: guy like my husband. He just loves all the attention
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: I get, like annoyingly so that he like brags about
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: me too much. Well, that's adorable. It's very cute. He's
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: very he's also cute. I'm also you know, I'm only
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: attracted to good looking guys.
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: I know, I know I have I have a history
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: of Yeah, my history is all over the shop. But
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: I think that's also a good thing because I'm pretty
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: open minded, like I'll try anything for a.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Little bit and then I'm like, oh no. But but also, Chelsea,
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: the paper thing, Fuck the paper? What paper?
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: You know?
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: What are they good on paper? That bullshit?
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: Oh no, I don't have attention to it. Yeah, I
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: have paying attention to my feelings, my instinct. You have
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: to be attracted in the beginning, well, you have to.
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: You can build attraction to someone. I wasn't attracted to
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: my last long term boyfriend in the beginning and over
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: time when you became friends and it just like hit
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: me one day, and that has something that was something
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: that never happened to me. Because I believe that too,
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: that you had to be instantly attacked, and I feel
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: like that can develop when you have a very close
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: friendship with someone, although I prefer to be instantly Yeah.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Well, but there's got to be attraction when you sleep
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: with them, Well, when you have sex with them, yes.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: But if you're hanging out with someone as a friend,
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: it can develop into romantic feelings without having had slept together.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: That's probably true. It's never happened.
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: It never happened to you. Yeah, so when you met
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: your husband, you knew he had kids. Your your friends,
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: I believe, were a little hesitant to even introduce.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: His brother was hesitant. But his brother's now husband and
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: boyfriend was a casting director, and he said, you're gonna
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: like this guy. And I thought, well, he's in casting,
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: he knows how to do that, right, that's a good point.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: So I listened to him and I made sure to
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: meet him, and then I thought he was so cute.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: And then I thought I was just gonna have a
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: fling with him because he had four kids and he
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: lived up state, and it was like, you know, he
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: was totally horrible on paper. But I used to have
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: a bit in my act but I would say, but
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: you know, you can't fuck paper, so you know. But
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: so I just thought I was going to have a
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: fling with him. And then I don't know what happened.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: I guess I was time. It was I was ready
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: for something different. So I raised kids. I know, that's amazing.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: I know, teenage where they girls and boys men three
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: girls that have boren But like now, I really like
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: having an adult relationship with them.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: But the teenage thing. And then we had a house
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: in the suburbs, and I don't know who I was,
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: but then I was. I was still back and forth
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: to LA and doing curb and doing stand up, and
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: they gave me all new material that.
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: Was the beautiors of course. Yeah, kids are really they
• 6:47
  Speaker 3: give you a lot, they do. I mean, they take
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: a lot of energy and stamina, you know, when you're
• 6:53
  Speaker 3: on the road, like I have a lot of friends
• 6:55
  Speaker 3: kids that I hang out with, my ex boyfriend's kids
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: I'm very close with. Yeah, and when I have them
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: with me traveling, you are forced to do way more
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: than you would do.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: On your own life, and pay more attention and get
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: up out of bed. But I see never sitting on
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: toddlers and little kids. No, Oh, that's just diper No, No,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: why did you never want to have kids? I have
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: never had the inclination.
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: I just too, I love my life, and I just
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: always saw myself as like this woman who was never
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: going to be.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: Tethered to a man or to a child.
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: Probably just a direct reaction to my own childhood because
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: there were so many kids in our family, six and
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: I was like, either I'm going to do that or
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: I'm going to do the opposite.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Did you have good parents? Well, I mean.
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: They meant well, you know, they weren't terrible, but they
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: weren't ideal.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well ideal, what's ideal? Exactly? There was a lot
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: of love.
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: My dad was Jewish, my mom was Mormon, so there
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: was a lot of nonsense. But we had a pretty
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: happy childhood. There was a lot of happiness, a lot
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: of love in our family were very close. Speaking of families, though,
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: I have to ask you about Bruce Springsteen and your
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: scenes with him, because that was so fucking funny with
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: Bruce on Curb.
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: You know, he was amazing. He is he was amazing.
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: I mean, okay, he does write all his own Bruce
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: Springsteam we're talking about. Yeah, he does write all his
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: own songs, and he did do a one man show
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: on Broadway. But he's never been in any kind of
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: TV or film ever. He told me he's never done
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: something like this before. And he was incredibly relaxing, you know,
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: as you know, we're all improvisedes. No, he couldn't learn dialogue.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: He just had to sit there and he just picked
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: it up so quickly, and it was you know, you
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: just never know how somebody It was not a comic
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: is going to improve, it's going to improvise. And he
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: was great. And you know he said to me before
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: I before I left, he said to me, can I
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: take a selfie with you? I was like, no, I
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: don't take selfie. He was so humble.
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: I know he's so I mean, have you seen him
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: per formats? And of course he's so fucking awesome to watch.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: I saw him before for the first time last summer,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: this past summer in and then again in Hyde Park
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: like in two weeks apart, and I will Hide Park
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: in London, Yes, and I will forever be a Bruce
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: Springstein family. That guy fucking plays for three hours and
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: sometimes four hours. He's seven and four youngster. I know
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: people talking about that who went to the Stones last weekend.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: They were saying they were like, you know they what
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: are they in the nineties now, No, the eighties, but
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: they said they were like, you know, on stage forever
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: and just energy and I can't do that. Well, what
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: is Mick?
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: Mick Jagger is like a live carcass dancing around on
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: the stage. I mean, have you ever seen a body
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: that looks that frail, that is able to move in
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: such with such volocity, sterity.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: No, I haven't, and not to mention the abuse of
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: all those years of abuse. I know they say they
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: get dryed.
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: I've heard multiple times that they get some sort of
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: blood transfusion, going, oh yeah, all the meds are like,
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: the medics are there.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: This is when the Eagles play too. There's always like
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: they're realer doctors just in case something, you know, they
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: get like they pass out or whatever.
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: But stand ups should happen, no kidding, I mean we
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: need something because we're traveling.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: Just what's the longest show you've ever done? Probably like
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: an hour and forty minutes. That's long, but that's the longest.
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: That's long. The difference is you're up there all by yourself.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: I mean, they got musicians, and you know, it's very
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: different being a musician than a comic. But I also,
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: we're not dancing. We're not singing, and we're not Some
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: comics are dancing, well, I wish I.
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: Wish they would stop as well, but dancing singing like,
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: it's definitely easier to do stand up.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: You're just I don't think so, Chelsea, Really, I don't
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: think so. I think you're yees yes, physically you're up
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: there standing with the mic in your hand. You know,
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: I've never been one of these physical, you know, comics.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: But I just think stand up is so much harder
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: than doing music because you got to get that laugh
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: and you're by yourself. When you go to like a
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: cafe or something, you see a combo, people are talking
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: and they're just singing. They're all playing. They don't care
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: if that was up on stage and they're all talking.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: We can't handle that. No, No, you're absolutely right, and
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: you got to get that left what every fifteen twenty seconds?
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: I was. I was on stage the other night at
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: a show, and I remember thinking, I can't believe I'm
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: supposed to be I'm the only one here to entertain
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: this exactly, like it's completely on my shoulders. If this
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: doesn't go, well, I don't do it anymore. You don't know,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: you don't do stand up anymore. I didn't know that. Yeah, Oh,
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: why are you over it? Yeah? Really, it just stopped.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of things. I think that I
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: was too addicted to the killing, and I got stale,
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: and then I just wasn't that interested. It wasn't that
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: creatively interesting, And it's just you know, I suffer from
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: stage fright, and it was just so hard and if it
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: wasn't creatively interesting. You know, my manager hates it because
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: he's like, you can make a lot of money now,
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: I once quit stand up and all they did, I
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: mean I took a break for like six years, and
• 11:53
  Speaker 3: all they did was my reps, like you need to
• 11:56
  Speaker 3: go back.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: You're leaving money on the table.
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: It's so much money to leave on the table, exactly,
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: And I was like, I don't have anything to say.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: I felt very sad. That's how I were saying right now.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: Maybe it'll change, but that's how I feel right now.
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: I think creative stuff comes in bursts, you know. I
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: think we all have bursts of creativity when we feel
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: really like passionate about doing stuff, and then there's a retreat.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of times I'm retreated right now.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: I get it, and I feel I feel sad about
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: it a little bit because there is something so great
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: about it.
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: Well, you're providing joy, yeah, and the most nicest way
• 12:27
  Speaker 3: to describe it as you are providing a joy and
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: a reprieve for other people. And I feel like for
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: me when I went back to stand up, it was
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: because I felt like I was helping, you know what
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: I mean.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: I used to think that, you know, all those nights
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: when you don't want to go on and I remember
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: standing backstage and I'm just like, all right, I'm gonna
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: go unclog some arteries now, you know. That would like
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: get me going. But the thought of having not done
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: it for like five six years, the thought of getting back,
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: how did you get back? I did a book I
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: did I wrote like my last book, and I did
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: a speaking engagement tour, yeah, where I had different celebrities
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: and all author's interview me on stage. Yeah. And then
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: if you have a podium, it's a thing of yes yes.
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: And while I did that, I just collected the material
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: through the conversation for my stand up, you know what
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: I mean.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: That's just smart, that's really smart.
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: It was actually really a good way for me to
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: get back in because I also was scared to get
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: back on stage.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Of course, if you haven't been on stage for rights,
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: I'll do the evening with thing where somebody's in I
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: like that. Yeah, of course, you know it takes it's
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: the onus is off you exactly. Yeah.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: I want to go back to kurb because it's my
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: one of my favorite shows, and it's so fucking funny
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: and I love I remember auditioning for Larry once when
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: I was like twenty five, and I was so excited
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: because improv is all I want to do.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I love improv. I hate scripts.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: I hate you know, it's so much easier just to
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: fucking like what you do on the show, which is
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: go off on whatever.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: It is that you don't have to. You don't have
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: to lie in bed the night before and go over
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: your lines and be nervous that you're not going to
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: remember them, because I'm horrible about that. And it's not
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: just that you don't have to learn a line, it's
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: that you get to you get to be part of
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: the creative process. I mean, you get to write your
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: own material, right, which is what we do exactly. And
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: you've called Larry a genius. Yeah, you think he's a genius.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: I do. I do because when I read, you know,
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: we have an outline, as you know, there's like a
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: very detailed outline. You know, every paragraph correlates to a scene,
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: and so you know what the scene is about. And
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: when I read the outlines, I can't figure out how
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: he did it. It's transcendent. And I have a comic
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: brain and I can't figure out how he did it.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: And it's just he's a genius at story. He's a genius.
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: It's pretty interesting to talk to anytime I see him
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: in public. He's always just very interesting to listen to,
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: you know, to ask questions too well.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: His brain works in a different way, and that's what
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: I think is genius. And you've been on the show
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: for twenty plus years? How many? Four years? Twenty four years?
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Twelve seasons?
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: WHOA, yeah, and you were a day player when you started.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: So when did you start? When did you get a contract?
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: Season eight?
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: Oh?
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: Godb yeah? But you know what I was. I mean,
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I was guest star. I was like day scale for
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: like the first three seats. I made no money on
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: that show for like the very beginning. But they made
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: up for it. It's fine. Oh they did it because
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: we can always sue them. No, no, no, it's fine.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: They love to say they've been very good. HBO is
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: a great place. The HBO treats their talent really well.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: And they've treated me in the in this last incarnation beautifully.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: I have no complaints.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: And so you guys just must sit on set and
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: laugh your fucking at you.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: You show up on set and there's all the people
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: that I came up with and stand up, you know,
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: I mean Larry and John Hayman and Carol Leafer and
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: you know, everybody's on set. I've been working with these
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: people for twenty four years or whatever, and we just laugh.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: And Larry loves to laugh, and he just you know,
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: whenever he gets yelled at, he just gets the giggles.
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: We just laugh all day. We laugh and we eat.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: It's the greatest. And for me, I show up and
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: I tell everybody to go fuck themselves, and then they
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: love me for it, and then they give me money
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: and I go home and you get to yell at, Yes,
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: you get to yell at Jeff Garlic. Yea yell at
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: It would be a pleasure for me as well. I'm
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: very invidious of your situation. Yeah, that's exactly the kind
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: of gig I would respect. You would love it.
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: No script, outline, improvise, yell at people and go home.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: But also it's like more than just yelling at people.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: There's there's story. You have to push forward. And what
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Larry sets up with Jeff Schaeffer who's are the ep
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: who writes all the outlines with Larry and he directs
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: almost all the episodes. It's a true situation comedy in
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: the sense that they set up these situations that like
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: in the beginning of the season, I read the outlines
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: that I'm just like, I can't believe what they have
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: me doing this season. Oh I have I have to
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: have vaginal rejuvenation surgery this season. It's like the ship
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: that they get. They give me the funniest shit to do,
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: and I just it's like, I can't wait to get
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: to set and and act out these scenarios. You know.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: It's just it's like, whatever it is. You know, I
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: guess I'm gonna have to learn signline, which is you know,
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: I just read the outlanes is like I have a
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: caftan business this season. Whatever it is, it's just they
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: give me the funniest stuff to do.
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: On that note, we're going to take a break and
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: we're going to be right back to meet with some
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: callers so Susie can dish out what she's so famous for.
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: No pressure to be a bitch, though, Susie.
• 17:20
  Speaker 5: This week, we're looking for relationship advice. If you're having
• 17:23
  Speaker 5: a problem in your relationship, want to know how to
• 17:25
  Speaker 5: do better or need Chelsea to weigh in on whether
• 17:27
  Speaker 5: you're right about something. Right into Dear Chelsea podcast at
• 17:31
  Speaker 5: gmail dot com and we're back.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: With Susie s Men. We are back, Catherine. What do
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: we have going on?
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: Well, we've got some women behaving badly, We've got some
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: men behaving badly.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: So let's start.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: With a workplace conundrum. Maria says, Dear Chelsea. I work
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: at a small office with six other women. I'm struggling
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: with this one issue that's come to light in the
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: past few months. One of my colleagues, whose single, late forties,
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: beautiful woman, started dating this guy in his mid fifties
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: who claims to be separated from his wife. The guy
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: lives in a different city and he and my coworker
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: only see each other every once in a while. Neither
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: of them are on social media. At first, I was
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: so happy for her, but as time went by, I
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: started noticing that the only time she would see him
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: was when he went to a conference. He would pay
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: for all of her expenses. She'd have the best time,
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: but a few of us in the office started wondering
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: why she was never invited to his city to hang
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: out with him at his place.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: Well, we know why, we know why.
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: That's when my other colleague asked her what his last
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: name was. I'm not proud to say we looked him
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: up and it didn't take us more than five minutes
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: to find his adult daughter's Facebook, where she had posted
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: photos of the most recent family cruise, where he seemed
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: pretty cozy with his wife. We wanted to give him
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: the benefit of the doubt and thought, maybe they have
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: an amicable relationship and still vacation together post separation, or
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: maybe it's an open marriage. But if this is the case,
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: then why wouldn't he just disclose this to my colleague?
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: My question is do I tell my friend. I'm very
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: much struggling to believe that she doesn't know about this
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: because it took me so little time to find the
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: photos online, so I'm not sure I'm ready to tell
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: her and confront the fact that she already knows and
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: just agrees to continue to see him. My gut feeling
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: tells me to leave this alone because it's none of
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: my business, But as a feminist, I find it very
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: hard to ignore the fact that this man's actions are
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: hurting his wife and honestly my colleague too, who clearly
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: doesn't think she deserves an available partner. I'm a huge
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: fan and would love to hear your thoughts on this, Maria.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you what I think. Well, hold on, Maria's here,
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: hold you marisus Susie, Maria would I the most beautiful
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: sound I ever heard? Susie is chomping at the Beria.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: Where are you there?
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: You are?
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I understand your concerns, but kill the messenger. I would
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: mind your own business. I would tell her, Yeah, you would.
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: I would because I just as a woman, this is
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: my philosophy. I feel like, since women are so fucked
• 19:54
  Speaker 3: and men are almost fucking us over, if we don't
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: have each other to rely on for the truth. And
• 19:59
  Speaker 3: I understand you are gonna it is troubling to be
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: the messenger, and she might be pissed at you, but
• 20:04
  Speaker 3: I would want someone to tell me.
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but she doesn't know anything firsthand. She just knows
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: what she found online, right Maria, that's right?
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: Yes?
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So this so the girlfriend could find the same
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: information online. Who goes out with somebody doesn't google them? Well,
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: lots of people actually, Well they're dumb. Yeah, I don't
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: google people ever.
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: Really, the less I know the better, Otherwise I'll find
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: some ick to be like, forget it. I don't want
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: to meet you, you know, if I see a belt
• 20:29
  Speaker 3: or like the rum shoe, you know, or if I
• 20:32
  Speaker 3: see them walk funny have you because you're.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: A superficial Chelsea.
• 20:38
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean it took me all of eight minutes
• 20:40
  Speaker 6: to find this information she wanted to know.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: If she wanted to know, she could find out. If
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: you knew this personally, like you knew the guy and
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: knew the wife would be different to me. But it's
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: your friend, it's her friend.
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: Like, I think you should tell your friend what you
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: found and let her see it, Like, yay, I just
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: want you to know.
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: This is what's the situation is. She's probably gonna stay
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: in the situation. I mean, but she might not. She
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: m might know about it already. Do you think she might?
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: That's it?
• 21:08
  Speaker 6: That's my like, And then it'd be super awkward for
• 21:10
  Speaker 6: me to be like, I don't know. I'm struggling with
• 21:12
  Speaker 6: telling her and her being like uh huh, And I'm like, oh,
• 21:16
  Speaker 6: all right, I guess we think differently about this, you know.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: Can you anonymously tell her, oh, there's a thought. I
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: mean we're a very small office. I mean, yes, splip
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: her a note.
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: You could get a fake email address and send her
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: the link to his Facebook account or whatever you found
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: from someone else, right, like from Susiesamon at gmail dot com.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: Or can you just like dig around and to figure
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: out if she knows? Yeah, I mean if she doesn't know,
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: then she's kind of dumb, you know. I mean from
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: what you describe that, the red flags are all there,
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: which is why you and your other coworkers are looking
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: into this. Correct, that's right, That is correct.
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and that's the thing too.
• 21:59
  Speaker 6: It's just the last conference they went to, there was
• 22:02
  Speaker 6: a dinner and she wasn't invited to the dinner. Of
• 22:05
  Speaker 6: course she wasn't because she's not the white you know, like.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, how do you not see this? You know,
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: how old is she? She's forty nine? I think no,
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: forty eight. She's not a kid. That's not that's not
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: good either. No, and you're right, maybe she does know.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: Like how close to a girlfriend is it? Is it
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: a really close girlfriend or just like more of a
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: work colleague friend. No, she's just my colleague we don't
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: have to know, So maybe she's happy just to get
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: laid every now and then and go to different conferences.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: I still think you should send her an anonymous link,
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: get a fake email address and send it to her.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: If she's not a really good friend. I think it's
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: awkward to say something. I do too. That's why the
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: anonymous thing is better.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: Because she does deserve to know the truth, but you
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: don't have to be the one giving it to her.
• 22:46
  Speaker 3: That way, you don't have to get to deal with
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: any of the reverberations of that true.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: And I don't want to make it awkward.
• 22:51
  Speaker 6: You know, if she goes on and she knows I know,
• 22:53
  Speaker 6: and it's like yeah, every day walking into the office, it.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Would be I do wonder if there's some digging around
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: the topic that you can do, like where do you
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: see your relationship going? Do you think you might marry
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: him one day or that sort of thing, or is
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: it just for fun?
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: At that age, I think it's completely reasonable to say,
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: has he been married? Does he have kids? I mean,
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: the guys know what in his fifties, Yeah he is,
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: and she knows he has kids. She knows Okay, he
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: had a wife that he just says he separated. Well,
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: maybe he is. Who knows? I would go ahead with
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: the anonymous and an anonymous email. I think that's a great idea,
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: and I'm going to start giving that advice to more people. Actually,
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: I think that's a really good idea.
• 23:29
  Speaker 4: I hadn't thought about that.
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean a forty nine year old woman. You're
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: not dealing with a twenty two year old girl. You're
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: dealing with a woman that might be fine with her.
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: It might be okay with her, that might be all
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: she wants that. You know, it's kind of nice not
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: to have any full commitment to someone who has another family.
• 23:43
  Speaker 6: I just think about the wife though, Like, you know,
• 23:45
  Speaker 6: he's not in my business.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: But I know that's the thing I feel like all
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: women's businesses, all of our business, I know, we don't
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: know the information. Maybe the wife can't stand him. Maybe
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: the wife does is fine with having him, living with him,
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: but doesn't want to have sex with him. You know,
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: who knows, who knows? They've been together a long time.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: Probably you know. The heat doesn't last. No, the heat
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: does not last.
• 24:06
  Speaker 6: And social media lized too right the photos I seen,
• 24:09
  Speaker 6: she like, they're like very cozy with each other.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: But social media social media, right, so well, I don't know.
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: I mean, that's not a lie necessarily if you're hugging
• 24:19
  Speaker 3: someone in a photo, I know, and your other colleagues
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: like coworkers, are on the same page. Yeah, okay, well,
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: I think you do the anonymous email and then let
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: us know what happens, let us know what the fallout is.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: I will for sure use my initials.
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: Ch Okay, it's a lot of great Maria, thank you
• 24:38
  Speaker 3: so much. By have a good stop interrupting the caller, Susie, Okay, sorry, Maritt,
• 24:43
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, the heat doesn't last.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: What do you do in your relationship to keep the firebird?
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: You just you kind of You make sure that you
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: have sex well. Also, you know i'm posting an old lady.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: Now I'm post metapausal. That changes things too, But you
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: make sure that you may have dates, and you make
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: sure to make it happen. It's still enjoyable. It's just
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: not like it was, you know, in the beginning. I
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: know that's why I'm always reluctant to spend a long
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: period of time with a man when I'm sexually attracted
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: to him, because I know it will wane, and I
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: want to keep those juices going. Yeah, so I like
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: three days on and then like two weeks off and
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: then a vacation. I think that's good.
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: It just in general that keeps the fire burning, right,
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: because once you're living with someone, it's over.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: But the important thing is to keep the familiarity with
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: to keep the intimacy without being overly familiar. You know,
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: when you're overly familiar and then you're infantilized, you become
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: mommy and daddy and you're on the toilet. Yeah, exactly right, no, right,
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: you know, you have to keep a little mystery. You know.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: It's like if I'm not in the mood, all right,
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: you know, I'll take a little gummy and I'll make
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: I'll get in the mood and I'll enjoy myself. It's
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: just not the way that it was.
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: It's like pizza, like you know, I think David Tel
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: says that all the time. It's like pizza, pussy Santa, like,
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: all of those things are going to be good once
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: you go.
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: And who would go better than David Tell about relationships.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Take relationship advice from David Tell. Okay, what's next? Cotherine?
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: All right, Well, Our next question is also a caller,
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: and this question comes from Jess Dear Chelsea. I just
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: moved to Montana from Maryland. I randomly thought of the
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: idea after Christmas, when my dad and I got into
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: a huge argument. I finally decided that I want nothing
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: to do with him or my biological sister. They were
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: some of the last people I cut off from my
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: life in twenty twenty three. I'm pretty sure I've cut
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: ties with ten to thirteen people in the last year.
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: I have trauma from my past, but I'm not sure
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: if that's the reason I've been cutting people off or
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: if I'm just done with the fuckery. I feel like
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: I hit a breaking point where getting close to people
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: is more.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: Annoying than not.
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: I've always had a lot of friends since grade school,
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: but now I'm thirty one and I feel like I
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: just don't have the space to hold for tediousness. People
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: just don't like an a a female. I even cut
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: off my therapist after one month because I felt like
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: she was just a yes man. The thing is everyone
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: I've cut off for my closest friends, and it feels
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: like I hit a switch and suddenly gave no fucks
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: about maintaining any friendships with them. My question for you
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: is am I the problem because I've cut so many
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: people off? Or is this just a part of life.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: Is running away quietly across the country the right solution?
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: Or do I need to find closure with everyone. I've
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: always been the person in my relationships to step forward
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: and ask to have the awkward conversations. But I'm kind
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: of sick of being the bigger person and saying I
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: understand why you did this after they explain themselves and
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: say sorry. But having cut so many people off, I
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: have to ask, am I actually the problem?
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Jess? It's an interesting one. Mm hmmm, yeah, Hi Jess, Hi,
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: how are you? We're good? Hi, how are you? This
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: is our special guest Susie today.
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: As Hi, Susie. Nice to meet you.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: Has Montana.
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: Oh, today's like one of the first warm days, so
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: I can't complain.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: Oh nice. My girlfriends in Montana. She just sent me
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: a video of a rushing river.
• 28:00
  Speaker 3: I was like, oh, she's on the set of Yellowstone
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, this looks like Yellowstone.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: Oh nice, beautiful minus all the Republicans.
• 28:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly.
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: So you move from Maryland to Okay, so what's give
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: us some idea what happened with your sister and your dad?
• 28:14
  Speaker 4: Okay, sister and my dad. So my dad is pretty
• 28:17
  Speaker 4: much a con artist. So like sometimes he'll get his
• 28:22
  Speaker 4: car stolen quote unquote just to get the insurance money back.
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: He's fallen in stores before, so those are like the
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: bigger deals, and my sister just chooses to ignore it.
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: Some other things that my dad has done, like on
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: a smaller scale, would be me coming home. I'm a
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: massage therapist, so coming home from school with all my
• 28:43
  Speaker 4: books and him telling me that I'm not going to
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: make it through school. And then when I bring it
• 28:47
  Speaker 4: up in the future, he's like, I didn't say that's
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: pretty much like gas lighting. He was not encouraging, not
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: encouraging whatsoever. So I just didn't invite him to my graduation,
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: you know, things like that. And when I do bring
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: things up to him, he pretends like he never said it.
• 29:02
  Speaker 4: Not only that, I got a call from one of
• 29:04
  Speaker 4: my friends saying that my dad was going around offering
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: to suck a guy's penis out of work where a
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: lot of my friends have worked at. Right, So like
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: I brought it up to his attention he denies the
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: whole thing.
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: Well that I understand him denying. And his daughter, do
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: you know that he's gay or you?
• 29:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, he oh he is gay. Yeah, but his
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: partner passed away after twenty years due to an alcohol addiction,
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: and he's just kind of gone off the reels.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: So he's emotionally unstable. Yeah, your dad is a hot mess.
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah. And my sister's excuse is that he's somewhere
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: on the spectrum so he doesn't know any better.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: Well, she might be right about that, but that doesn't
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: matter if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
• 29:51
  Speaker 4: Right, And like, I mean, I have fifty years old,
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: you should know better by now, you know?
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: Well, I know a lot of fifty year olds who
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: or sixty or seventy year old who don't know better.
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: But you know, I think the cutting off of the
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: family is a little bit of a different issue than
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: cutting off of the friends.
• 30:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, talk to us about that, Like why are you
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: cutting off so many friendships?
• 30:13
  Speaker 4: I'm cutting off my friendships and a lot a lot
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: of them are my long term friendships because I feel
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: like I'm giving, given, giving, and then when I pull back,
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: I don't get anything in return. Whether it's like materialistic
• 30:25
  Speaker 4: or like emotional support or anything like that. Some of them,
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: I'm just like, you're e fin stupid, you.
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: Know, Jess. How old are you?
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: Thirty one?
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: Thirty one? Okay, so yeah, on that kind of And
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: have you made some friends in Montana?
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: Now, I've been here for about two months and I've
• 30:44
  Speaker 4: been mingling. I've gone out with a couple of people.
• 30:47
  Speaker 4: But I'm kind of having a problem of trying to
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: figure out what I want to accept as friendships and
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: how much I want to give of myself to other people,
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: you know, you.
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: Know, I mean, remember a point in my life where
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: anybody who made me feel icky, I just cut out.
• 31:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's where I are.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: That wasn't everybody, you know, it wasn't.
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: You get to a certain point your life and as
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: you move along and you change, and whether it's success
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: or whatever, people start treating you a little bit differently.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: You know. But if you're cutting off, if it's like
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: across the board everybody, I think you need to look
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: within a little bit.
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah. And I've kept like a few close friends, but
• 31:32
  Speaker 4: I have had like a big broad spectrum of friends
• 31:35
  Speaker 4: as well. Everyone always says Jes knows everyone, and so
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: I've kind of been like that people pleaser of like
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: what do you need? And I think I've kind of
• 31:44
  Speaker 4: like taken a step back to be like, well what
• 31:47
  Speaker 4: do I need? You know, and like why are you
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: guys not giving it to me? And so now I'm
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: getting pissed off that, like they aren't able to give
• 31:54
  Speaker 4: me what I need.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: I think that's a very valid kind of place to be.
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: But maybe you're going a little ex d but maybe
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: you need to, maybe she needs to.
• 32:02
  Speaker 3: I think it's a question of you know, when you're
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: thirty one years old, you are transitioning into a different
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: decade of your life, and you are becoming more mature,
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: and you're becoming less tolerant, as we all know, as
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: we age, we become less tolerant of the nonsense. Yeah,
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: you don't want to surround yourself with people that don't
• 32:16
  Speaker 3: appreciate you or that are only taking from you.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: But do you like speak with a therapist. Do you
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: have a therapist that you talk to about this?
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that was another thing. I try to talk to
• 32:25
  Speaker 4: two therapists.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you fired her too, right, Yeah, Well, finding
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: the right therapist is very difficult. It's very difficult to
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: find the right is that's true, they might not have
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: been the right people. So that's that's you know, not
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: necessarily on you.
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but then that's where I am like, how do
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: you start the therapy session without like spilling everything out?
• 32:44
  Speaker 4: You know, like I've already done with you guys, Like,
• 32:47
  Speaker 4: where do I hold back? Where do I give?
• 32:50
  Speaker 3: Well, that's what therapy is for, is to vomit out
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: all of your That's what the person is sitting there
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: to listen to you tell them everything, and then hopefully
• 32:57
  Speaker 3: they can help you digest it and figure out a
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: way forward. I understand what you're saying. There's been a
• 33:02
  Speaker 3: lot of people that I've nixed out of my life.
• 33:04
  Speaker 3: There's a lot of people who've nixed me out of
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: their lives, you know what I mean. Over the course
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: of forty years, fifty years almost you know, that's happened
• 33:10
  Speaker 3: a lot. I think you have to have a degree
• 33:13
  Speaker 3: of self awareness, and it sounds like you do because.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: You're aware that you're cutting, you're asking the questionships. Yeah, exactly,
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: And so from two Jewish women who've spent a lot
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: of time in therapy, a lot of these are all
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: good signs.
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: These are signs of life. Okay, but I think it's
• 33:30
  Speaker 3: good that you're questioning yourself. I wouldn't beat yourself up,
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: but I would show grace to yourself while also showing
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: it to the new people that you meet in your life.
• 33:38
  Speaker 3: When you're meeting someone or you're forming a friendship with someone,
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: it's it's not a competition about who's giving more. You know,
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: you're getting a sense of who a person is, and
• 33:47
  Speaker 3: over a period of time is when you really get
• 33:49
  Speaker 3: to know somebody. So I would be graceful in your
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: new relationships, knowing that you had a pattern of ending
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: a lot of relationships or picking the wrong people to
• 33:58
  Speaker 3: be close to you. Right, like moving into this new
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: you have a whole new like life now right you're
• 34:04
  Speaker 3: in Montana. You just got there. This is exciting and
• 34:07
  Speaker 3: it's a whole new chance to paint like a great
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: picture for yourself or a life. And I think you
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: should show yourself grace, and you should show everyone you
• 34:15
  Speaker 3: meet grace and just be a little bit less, you know,
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: like expectant of what you're getting in return, what.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: Your expectations are. You know what your expectations are in
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: a relationship and maybe you're expecting too much from people.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: And I also think that there's a big difference between
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: friends and family. You know, family you're stuck that you
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: don't choose them. Your friends you choose, so you know,
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: if the family feels toxic to you in some way.
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: I think it's okay to take a break from family too,
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: I really do. It's not easy.
• 34:46
  Speaker 4: See, I was nervous because Chelsea normally says, like, your
• 34:49
  Speaker 4: family is your family, and like you have to work
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: towards it.
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: Well, not when your dad's offering has suck dick at
• 34:55
  Speaker 3: a party, Like, no, that's not acceptable behavior.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: That's so awful to hear as a child that your
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: father's it's really inappropriate.
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: But to my friends, okay, So not only not only that,
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: but then what do I do about my sister because
• 35:11
  Speaker 4: now I feel like she kind of holds her children
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: as currency and our friends or like in our relationships,
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: so like she doesn't reach out to me whatsoever. She
• 35:21
  Speaker 4: waits until I reach out to her. She'll pay attention
• 35:23
  Speaker 4: to like my Instagram or my Snapchat stories, but other
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: than that, like she doesn't like anything, She doesn't ask
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: me how anything is.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: Sometimes you just need time, though, just sometimes you just
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: need time. You left two months ago, it's not a
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: lot of time. And sometimes these relationships, I mean, I've
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: taken breaks with different members of my family because I
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: just had to. And sometimes you just need that.
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: How long is a break for you?
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: You don't have to put a time frame on it.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: I think the most important thing to recognize is what
• 35:55
  Speaker 3: Zusie said is totally right.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: First of all, you're very good. You can tell that
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: your mother.
• 35:59
  Speaker 3: Susie, you're very good at You drew a boundary, you
• 36:03
  Speaker 3: moved to Montana, you got away from your family. Your
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: sister and your nieces and nephews aren't necessarily the problem
• 36:08
  Speaker 3: that you're expressing that you have with your father.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: That's a different, you know.
• 36:11
  Speaker 3: I mean, they're there, but I think you give that
• 36:14
  Speaker 3: time and you just stay in communication for the sake
• 36:17
  Speaker 3: of the children obviously, and your relationship with your sister.
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: And when she comes around, she comes around, but don't
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: punish her, you know what I mean. Like, it's nice
• 36:25
  Speaker 3: to just keep any line of communication open. If she's
• 36:29
  Speaker 3: checking your stories and she's checking your snapchat, she cares
• 36:32
  Speaker 3: what you're doing.
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: Right, Okay, yeah, I think So what do you.
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: Think she's checking it for I think she's spiteful.
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: I think she doesn't agree with my lifestyle and she
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: thinks that I'm very judgmental towards her lifestyle.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: What's her lifestyle?
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: You know, feeding the babies candy right when they wake
• 36:49
  Speaker 4: up in the morning and Gerber's pack.
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: That's not your problem though, that's not your business. Yeah,
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: you can't be judgmental of that because you're not their parent.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: I also think that you should be careful about being
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: too hard on yourself because what you've done is very brave.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: You've moved across the country on your own, You've cut
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: ties with people that are hurtful to you, and it's
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: not an easy thing. And I think the fact that
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: you're asking the question is it me or them? Shows
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: that you're evolved enough to ask that question.
• 37:19
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: I agree like an narcissist.
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: I was told this in therapy when I asked my
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: therapist if I was a narcissist that he said, typically
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: narcissists aren't looking for Feedback's right, that's right, right.
• 37:32
  Speaker 4: That's like my question sometimes, like do I have like
• 37:35
  Speaker 4: these narcissistic tendencies that make me push people away or.
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: Well, you might you know that that this is something
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: that needs to be explored with a good therapist. I think, yeah,
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: you got to keep trying to find your new therapist.
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: But I think asking all these questions is a very
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: strong identifying factory that you are on the right track,
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: you know what I mean. You're not just blowing through
• 37:56
  Speaker 3: people and you're thinking twice about it. You're going, Wow,
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: I just lost a lot of friends, or I cut
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: off a lot of friends. Maybe I'm the problem, you know,
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: And maybe maybe you are part of the problem. I'm
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: sure you're an element of the problem. But who's to
• 38:08
  Speaker 3: say that it is a problem. Maybe you're just getting
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: rid of the fat in your life and at thirty,
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: you're coming of age in a different way, and you're
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: more discerning about who you're going to spend your time
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: with and what you're looking for in friendships.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: And I think that's good, that's not a bad thing.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: And but one thing I would be careful of, because
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: I agree with everything that Chelsea just said, But one
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: thing I would be careful of is expecting too much
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: from people. And it sounds as though I don't know
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: about your mother, but it sounds as though your father
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: was damaged in a way that could not give you
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: what you need. And maybe you're looking for that in
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: other people and that's not their job.
• 38:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I agree with you one hundred percent.
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: That's not the job of a friend. So you have
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: to be careful of what you expect from other people. Also, Okay,
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: that's good advice.
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, thank you for that. Yeah, it's true, because you know,
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: I've always been mad at my dad for like not
• 38:59
  Speaker 4: being the quote unquote dad that he should be. But
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: I mean, if you guys haven't called on he is
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: gay and he had to be a gay.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: Paar quote on when he when you mentioned the dicksie.
• 39:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah, who knows?
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: Where's your where's your mom? Is she in the picture?
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: She actually ran away from my father when we were toddlers.
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So you you have stuff there of abandonment and
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: and all this stuff, and you might, I don't know,
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: but you might be expecting too much from your friends. Yeah,
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: because there's there's the hole to fill, you know, and
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: the only person who could feel that is you. The
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: only person who can fill your hole is you.
• 39:44
  Speaker 4: That this is very true.
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: It's an inside job.
• 39:49
  Speaker 3: And then when you are full, you don't you're not
• 39:51
  Speaker 3: looking for people to show up in ways that you
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: have been abandoned in the past or let down in
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: the past, because that's not anyone's responsibilit but your own
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: to kind of fix that. So I think you really
• 40:03
  Speaker 3: have to be consistent or determined to find a good therapist.
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: And now that everything's on zoom anyway, it's not like
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: you have to find someone in my tentat you know
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: what I mean. You could find someone anywhere in the
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: world or in the country. At the very least that
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: you can do. You know that you try and get
• 40:18
  Speaker 3: a connection going with and someone you feel safe with
• 40:21
  Speaker 3: and unpack all of this because it's a lot.
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, that's good advice too, and just keep it.
• 40:27
  Speaker 4: Is like shopping.
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: Yes, it's like shopping. Just stay at it. Once you
• 40:31
  Speaker 3: find someone, it'll be worth it. It's like finding your soulmate.
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: Look at Susie. She waited until she was forty eight
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: years old and then she got married to or she
• 40:38
  Speaker 3: got married at fifty three.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: You met him at forty and you got married at
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: fifty to three, efty three for the first time. But
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: you know, with therapists also, I had several therapists that
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: were not the right one till I found the right one,
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: and then she saved my life really because she was
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: you know, she was the right person. So it's important
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: to find the right person.
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: And how many sessions do you go with someone before
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: you realize it's not working?
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, I mean it depends on how in
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: which way it's not working. Like there was one who
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: was she was lovely, but she was just you know,
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: And there was another who was hostile who I ended
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: very quickly, So it depends on how it's not working.
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: And then I found, you know, a great woman who
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: saved my life.
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what I'm waiting for. I think I just
• 41:19
  Speaker 4: get a little anxious, like tell it.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: But just Chelsea, here in your background, you need to
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: be in therapy because there is early damage there that
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: needs to be looked at. Yeah, and a very common thing.
• 41:32
  Speaker 3: I mean, not only is your dad a disappointment and
• 41:34
  Speaker 3: your mother abandoned you, so there's a lot of abandonment
• 41:37
  Speaker 3: going on there. So the lot of the things that
• 41:38
  Speaker 3: you might be expecting from your friends is a combo
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: of the abandonment and the you know, and the I
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: mean your poor father had to raise you alone, you know,
• 41:45
  Speaker 3: which many women have to do.
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: But that's hard too, So he's sure struggling.
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: It doesn't mean you have to hang out with him,
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: and you know, but you have to understand that he
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: has his own life too, and he had to deal
• 41:56
  Speaker 3: with something that wasn't planned and he's gay and he
• 41:58
  Speaker 3: had to deal with that being married.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: You know, it's at what age should he come out?
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: Uh? He came out before I was born, and his
• 42:05
  Speaker 4: father forced him to be with my mother, who had
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: had my sister. Yeah, and it gets even messier from there,
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: but like, we don't need to go into that.
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so he's got his own stuff. He's got his
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: own stuff for sure. One of the things you start
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: to realize as you get older is you start to
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: see your parents as human beings and not just your parents.
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: And everybody comes by their own shit, honestly, you know.
• 42:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Yeah, and I know this is his I always
• 42:33
  Speaker 4: joke around and say, if we've lived many lifetimes, this
• 42:36
  Speaker 4: is his first. But as far as like my sister
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: and I go, she thinks therapy is a joke. And
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: if I've brought up therapy to her for a couple
• 42:47
  Speaker 4: of different reasons, and she gets really offended by it.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: I've dealt with that with a sibling.
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So how are you to go about like your
• 42:55
  Speaker 4: relationship if they don't think that they could be helped.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: It's a problem. You're living in two different worlds, really,
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: and you could either just accept it. You're not going
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: to change her, that is one thing I've learned. Also,
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: you're not going to change anybody. So you could either
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: just accept who she is and her belief system or
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: stay away.
• 43:16
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: The other thing is I mean she had the same
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: mother and father, so she needs therapy also, so you.
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: Know, right, but she chooses to ignore it.
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, but that's a lot of people. That's
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: also not your issue. Your issue you're focusing. I think
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: one of the problems here, which is very common for
• 43:33
  Speaker 3: all of us, is you're outward focusing on other people
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: and what their shortcomings and their issues are, and really
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: the main issue is you and how you're going to
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: be healthy and how you're going to heal from all
• 43:44
  Speaker 3: of this childhood stuff, because it's a healing process and
• 43:47
  Speaker 3: until you get with the right person that speeds up
• 43:50
  Speaker 3: and expedites everything that you're talking about. I think you
• 43:53
  Speaker 3: should work on your judgment because you seem like you're
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: judging a lot of people.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: So you got to stop that. And that's another thing
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: you're going to learn in therapy.
• 44:01
  Speaker 3: That's what I learned. I'm super fucking judgmental. I am
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: so judgmental if someone doesn't do so you know, people
• 44:07
  Speaker 3: are sloppy drunk. I love alcohol.
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: I mean all I do.
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: Is drink and smoke pot. But when somebody is sloppy,
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: I have no tolerance right that. I'm like, no, no,
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: no no.
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: And people are like, what are you talking about. You're
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: a miss party on them all.
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, but I keep my fucking shit together
• 44:20
  Speaker 3: and I need you to keep your shit together.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: So I understand the judgment and that is a work
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: in progress. You really have to work on that with
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: your therapist. But yeah, keep going. Thank you for calling.
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: I think you're adorable and.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: You're brave, like Susie said, for moving to Montana. And
• 44:36
  Speaker 3: this is a new beginning, which is just I want
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: you to think of everything moving forward as a new, fresh,
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: positive beginning.
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: Okay, I appreciate that.
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: And when you catch yourself judging someone, just catch yourself.
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: And take a step back. Yeah yeah, all right, Well,
• 44:51
  Speaker 4: thank you ladies. I appreciate all of you.
• 44:54
  Speaker 3: Thank you, honey, take care, good luck, bye bye. Okay,
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: Susie just expired six I know we got to get
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: her out because I was late to this episode. So
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: it's all my faults, listeners.
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: But we had such a good time. I know we
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: had a great time. We'll do it again. It's really
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: upsetting that you have to go, but you have to
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: go to the airport. I do you live here in
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: New York? Yes, but I do have a thing called zoom. Okay,
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: well no, I'm gonna come in.
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: We're gonna do it in person. We're gonna do it
• 45:23
  Speaker 3: again because you You were great by the way.
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: I love giving it. I love it.
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: And have a safe flight, all right, try not to
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: get monkey pocks. Oh god, it's back.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: I'm wearing a mask. Okay. So upcoming shows that I
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: have you guys, Auckland, New Zealand, Wellington, New Zealand, Melbourne, Australia,
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: Brisbane and Australia, Sydney, Australia. We've added second shows to
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: places that have sold out the first and then I'm
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: gonna be in Hawaii on Maui, Ka Hulue and Honolulu.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: I will be there in July.
• 45:53
  Speaker 3: Also in July, I'm coming to Niagara Falls on July
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: twenty seventh. I'm coming to Hollywood, Florida for my only
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: show in Florida on twenty eighth. I'll be in Auburn,
• 46:01
  Speaker 3: Washington on August first, and then Santa Rosa, California for
• 46:05
  Speaker 3: my second show August second. August seventeenth is the Santa
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: Barbara Bull You do not want to miss that. And
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: then I will be all over Maine, Charlotte, North Carolina, Charleston,
• 46:16
  Speaker 3: South Carolina.
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: I'm coming to Texas. I'm coming to Saint Louis and
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: Kansas City.
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: I'm coming to Brooklyn, New York at the King's Theater
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: on November eighth, and I have tickets on sale throughout
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: the end of the year in December, So if you're
• 46:31
  Speaker 3: in a city like Philadelphia or Bethlehem, or San Diego
• 46:35
  Speaker 3: or New Orleans or Omaha, check Chelseahandler dot com for tickets.
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: Okay, if you'd.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: Like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email at Dear
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be sure to
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: by Brad Dickert.
• 46:51
  Speaker 5: Executive producer Catherine Law, and be sure to check out
• 46:53
  Speaker 5: our merch at Chelseahandler dot com