Latest / ok storytime / I REFUSED to invite my friend's girlfriend to dinner... and it blew up in my face! -r/BestofRedditorUpdates | Reddit Stories | EP3134

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I REFUSED to invite my friend's girlfriend to dinner... and it blew up in my face! -r/BestofRedditorUpdates | Reddit Stories | EP3134 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Angie.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Carly, your favorite OK Storytime hosts. And
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: we've got some great stories coming up. But before that,
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: we have a quick two-minute break from our sponsors that
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: keep the show alive.
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: I refused to invite my friend's girlfriend to dinner, and
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: it blew up in my face.
• 0:17
  Speaker 4: Oh, it's a real bad a la carte.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying? I, 21 female, have a
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: close friend, 21 male, that I've known since I was
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: a baby. We have never had a romantic history. Since
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: summer is one of the only times us and our
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: other close friends get to hang out, I thought it
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  Speaker 3: would be fun to do something nice for my birthday
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  Speaker 3: and all go to a fancy dinner place on me
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: and later go clubbing. I'm a pretty extra person, so
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: I wanted to make a whole night out of it. However,
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: my friend's girlfriend is visiting him right now. I have
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: genuinely nothing against this girl. She seems really sweet. I've
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: met her a couple of times, even in moments where
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: I was unaware she was coming. I initially just thought
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: it was because she didn't know anyone here and didn't
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: want to be cooped up at his house while he
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: was with friends. Still, it being practically every time was
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: odd to me, and I was a little annoyed as
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: I have a low social battery and it takes a
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: lot more out of me to hang out with new people.
• 1:14
  Speaker 4: Really?
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: I know after you just said, like, I'm so extra,
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: but I'm actually really introverted.
• 1:20
  Speaker 5: Meeting new people isn't that hard, what?
• 1:23
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, I guess some people are.
• 1:25
  Speaker 5: Just just putting in the effort to say hello.
• 1:28
  Speaker 4: What's going on? It's just like this is just like
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: a new chick that rolled in.
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: And OP is like jealous of her.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: No, I don't think so.
• 1:36
  Speaker 5: I kind of feel those over to undertones, though.
• 1:38
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: I feel like this girl is jealous alone.
• 1:42
  Speaker 5: That's a good conspiracy theory.
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: That's why when planning my birthday, I wanted it to
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: be just all of our friend group. When some people
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: asked to invite others, I declined for the same reason. Also,
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: partly because I didn't want to end up paying for
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: a huge bill at the dinner, especially for people I
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: didn't know as well. Are you paying for your own
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: birthday dinner?
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah, get some real friends.
• 2:01
  Speaker 5: Yeah!
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  Speaker 4: That's all you gotta do.
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  Speaker 3: I felt a bit bad about it, though, so I
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: offered for anyone who wanted to meet up with us
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: to go clubbing afterwards. By the way, this comes from PrestigiousOne2002,
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: and if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: to the r slash ok story time subreddit. I'm Savannah.
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: I'm Mike.
• 2:18
  Speaker 5: I'm Riley, and Mike is my good comedy friend.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: And we're here to talk about some stuff, get some advice,
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: but we don't have all your answers. We're only going
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: to tell you what we would do, but let us
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: know what you would do down in the comments. As
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: OP says, my friend asked, particularly begging, to let his
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: girlfriend come, and I told him the same thing. He
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: argued she doesn't have a car right now and couldn't
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: meet up with us afterwards, but he has a car
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: she could use. Our other friend is driving us home,
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  Speaker 3: so I didn't know why that was such a big issue.
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: I also said he didn't need to come if he
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: or her didn't feel comfortable, but he told me it
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: had nothing to do with her thoughts on me. She
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: just wanted to be included. He ended up saying he
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: would figure something out. I didn't hear much about it until.
• 3:01
  Speaker 4: The day of.
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  Speaker 3: Everything went down smoothly at the dinner. We all had
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: a great time. She met up with us at the
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: first club and after avoiding me for a while, pulled
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: me aside to chat. She told me she thought I
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: was extremely weird and exclusionary and that she knew I
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: hated her.
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: Oh, what's going on? That's some fighting words right over there, dude.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, on her birthday.
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: On her birthday too, I forgot. And where she's paying
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: for her own dinner. Insane.
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: I'm aware I might come off as an aggressive person,
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: but I was a little stunned in the moment. She
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: had drank a lot, so I tried to be civil
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: but didn't know what else to say except that I
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: never meant to come off as such. She said that
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: made it even worse because I wasn't even self-aware of
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: the behavior. Girl, who cares? Just be like, oh, actually,
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: you know, we don't really know each other that much
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  Speaker 3: and I wasn't invited to your birthday dinner. That's cool.
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: Now I'm out clubbing. We're celebrating. Who cares?
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: That's all it is though, right? Like she wasn't invited. Okay. Yeah.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: She wasn't invited to the dinner, but she was invited afterwards.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: A lot of people, a lot of people do kind
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: of forget that like not everybody needs to be invited everywhere.
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: You know what I mean?
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: Like you got, you got friends, you got close friends,
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: you got family, you know, everyone's in a different category.
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: It's the different like levels and like closeness. You know
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: what I mean?
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: She also said it was hypocritical to assume she was
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: insecure of me when I was obviously the territorial person.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: I think that's because of the conversation I had with
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: my friend about her coming before. I said, all right,
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: and walked away because I didn't want to escalate the
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: situation when we had been drinking. It's now the next
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: day and I'm not sure what to do. I honestly
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: don't really want to reach out because I feel like
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: she insulted me, but also do not want to make
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: up because I feel like it's a misunderstanding. And there
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: are some comments.
• 4:46
  Speaker 4: Oh man, this, this, I swear to God, this to
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: me does read just like chick stuff. You know what
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: I mean? I swear to God, bro. You know, it's
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: like he didn't invite me. You know, she didn't invite me.
• 4:58
  Speaker 4: I was like, bro, it's just like this is so dumb.
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: Commenter one says Opie is in love with friend and
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: can't deal with him being with someone else. Thus is
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: acting like a brat. Opie responds. I have a boyfriend
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: who I've been with for almost two years. My friend
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: is like a brother to me. Our parents are really close,
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: so we grew up almost as such. Comment number two says,
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: Do you have a low social battery, or are you
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: an extra person who wants to make a whole night
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: of it in the club? Something doesn't add up here.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: Not sure if you are the a-hole or not, but
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: you are not telling the whole truth either to us
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: or to yourself.
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: Whoa.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: And that's exactly what I pointed out, too. I'm really
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: listening to this story.
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: Damn, we got a potential clock moment going on over here, dude.
• 5:41
  Speaker 4: Holy schmoly, dawg.
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: OP responds, I don't know if my perspective makes any sense,
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: but I consider myself an outgoing person who enjoys fun things,
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: but I wear myself down really fast. I am able
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: to have a fun night out and want to from
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: time to time, like on my birthday, but it takes
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: a lot out of me and I need a while
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: to recharge. Especially if I'm around people I don't know
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: that well.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's fair.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: Normal.
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: Same way.
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: Comment number three says, I do get that, but since
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: you were going to the club and we're going to
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: be around hundreds of strangers anyway, it seems a bit
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: pointless to limit the number of people at dinner. If
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: you just didn't want her around at dinner or if
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: it was about money, that is absolutely valid. But be
• 6:20
  Speaker 3: upfront about it. She probably acted like a butt after
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: a few drinks and seems like you made a big
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: deal out of it that didn't have to be one.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: Just my reading of the situation. I'm not American, as
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: you can possibly tell. And the idea of paying for
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: your own birthday dinner seems really weird to me. If
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: it's a normal thing over there, then you have my sympathy.
• 6:39
  Speaker 5: You know who that sounded like? The friend's girlfriend.
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: The thing is, I feel like none of these commenters
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: have read the story. And I've never thought that before.
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: I'm usually like, what's happening? So the fact that I
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: am getting the story and like these people aren't, there's something.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: Going on here.
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: There's something going on here, man.
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: Because she said, she's like, one, she's not in love
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: with him. They are like sister and brother. That is
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: what their relationship is. Next, she didn't invite everyone to
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: dinner because there would be a lot of freaking people.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: And it wasn't just her. It was everyone. Like, everyone
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: was like, oh, can I have a plus one? No,
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: you can't.
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: I still can't get over the fact that she's paying
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: for her own dinner.
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  Speaker 5: Me neither, dude. Oh, my gosh.
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: It is like, dude, it's her birthday. It's her day.
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: You know what I mean? Take her out. Take her out.
• 7:26
  Speaker 4: Take her out, though.
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: Opie responds, in my personal experience, it probably doesn't apply
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: to everyone in America. It's like an appreciation thing. I
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: want to be able to get my close friends together
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: and celebrate how much they mean to me, especially since
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: they've gotten me through a lot of lows. It's not
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: as if none of them got me anything in return either.
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: Many of them gave me a gift or paid for
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: drinks later that night. As for the club versus dinner,
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: dinner was more of an intimate thing and afterwards was
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: the traditional party. There really weren't that many people at
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: the dinner and I mentioned personal stuff and my gratefulness
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: towards them. I thought inviting more people to go clubbing
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: with us after could be a good compromise, but I
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: didn't take into account that it could come off as
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: weirdly selective slash hypercritical. It's not! The fact that this
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: girl is being weird about it, she's just, she's mad
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: she didn't get invited to dinner.
• 8:17
  Speaker 6: Oh well.
• 8:18
  Speaker 5: Time out, time out, time out. Your boyfriend gets invited
• 8:20
  Speaker 5: to dinner, but you're not.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: She grew up with him. She doesn't know this girl.
• 8:25
  Speaker 5: That's his girlfriend.
• 8:26
  Speaker 3: I don't need your girlfriend. I've done this so many times.
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: Like my sister had a birthday dinner with her friends
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: and said I just like invited her guy friends and
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: friends that are girls and then was like nobody bring
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: their significant others.
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: Oh, okay.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Just wanted them to be there.
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just the people that you know.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: I need all these people. Like, she hardly knows this girl.
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: She hardly knows this guy. It's like, I just want
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: my friends to be there.
• 8:51
  Speaker 7: It sounds like this girl is trying to make community
• 8:54
  Speaker 7: and just having her at the end of the table
• 8:56
  Speaker 7: with her boyfriend.
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: But then they'll be focusing on each other. It's like,
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: I want you to be there for me.
• 9:01
  Speaker 4: There are times where I'll just be like, I just
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: need the people that I know right now.
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: And also, it's my birthday. I can do whatever the
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: hell I want.
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: Bro, nobody's paying for my dinner, my birthday dinner.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: No one's paying for my birthday dinner, and you want
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: me to invite strangers?
• 9:15
  Speaker 4: No.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: It's my birthday dinner. I want my close friends here.
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: That's it. And everyone else can come later on. Why
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: is that such an issue?
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: I mean, this has got me riled up right now.
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: It's insane. God, man.
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: Update. This morning, his girlfriend reached out to me. I
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: was planning on reaching out, but she got to me first.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: She apologized for how she treated me at the club,
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: but addressed how she felt uncomfortable around me and that
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: her words weren't entirely dishonest. Then why are you apologizing
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: if you meant it?
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I just like saying stuff just to say it, though.
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: I just want to hear how it sounds when I
• 9:50
  Speaker 4: say it. I don't believe in anything that I really say,
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: you know what I mean?
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: But something I didn't know which made me feel even
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: worse is that my friend suggested she should stay home
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: the whole time because me and her were never gonna
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: get along so that's a conversation for another time I
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: don't really understand why he would say that I apologize
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: profusely about leaving her out and that even though it
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: was an unconscious decision that doesn't matter if someone's feelings
• 10:19
  Speaker 3: are hurt It.
• 10:20
  Speaker 5: Was not an unconscious decision.
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: You hurt my feelings, I'm so sorry. My bad, nobody
• 10:25
  Speaker 4: paid for your birthday dinner.
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: Nonetheless, I explained my perspective about dinner being a close-knit
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: thing where I was paying for everyone's meals, which she
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: did not know. And I said no to other people
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: who had joined us at the club when she arrived.
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: I learned when she told my friend she didn't mind
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: waiting till the club, But when she arrived, thought it
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: was practically only her who was showing up later. From
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: that perspective, I totally can understand her thinking I was
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: being intentionally malicious. We also talked about my social battery,
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: which I know has been a big debate in the comments,
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: which she said she was confused about because I come
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: off as a louder person around my friends. So she
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: thought it was just animosity toward her. I told her
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: my honest truth that I'm most nervous around people I
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: don't know that well because of things like worrying I
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: could screw up a friendship or become hated in a
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: single conversation or from a joke that came off wrong. Ironically,
• 11:22
  Speaker 3: it seems I had done just that by supposedly protecting
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: my peace in the moment. I'll try to think bigger
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: around stuff like that in the future and not get
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: so in my head about my emotions. We came to
• 11:32
  Speaker 3: the consensus that it was a big misunderstanding and that
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: in general, better communication was needed across the board. She's
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: going to talk to my friend about it, too, because
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: he apparently painted a different picture out of the situation
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: than my explanation. I'm going to leave that to her, though.
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I don't think it's my place to talk on that
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: quite yet. I won't go over everything else that happened,
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: but we both are completely good with one another. We
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: hugged it out and made plans one on one before
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: she leaves because I do really want to get to
• 11:59
  Speaker 3: know her and be her friend.
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 12:02
  Speaker 6: But just not at your birthday.
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: This honestly is just like I feel like maybe just
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: like a classic female relationship. Right. It is.
• 12:08
  Speaker 3: You suss them out, and it's like, all right, you're
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: pretty cool. It takes a while to get there.
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: It's funny you say that. I was thinking, like, you
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: guys usually hate each other at first, and then you
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: guys are like, okay, you know, this is not too bad. Yep.
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: I'd prefer if people would stop assuming this is a
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: romantic issue. I am truly happy with my own boyfriend.
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: Love my pal, but he is just that. I'd also
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: like to mention that none of her words were accusatory
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: of me in such a way. She said territorial because
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: that's how I came off in the group, which I'm
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: going to try and work on. Still, I understand that
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: these types of situations always come off a certain way
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: because you don't actually see how any of us interact.
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: We're going to move on in life. We're all young
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: college students who still are growing as people. And that's
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: the end.
• 12:52
  Speaker 6: Aww.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: You know what? I agree.
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that was a good ending. Good ending for that.
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: I mean, you can judge people. You're allowed to. You're
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: allowed to have an opinion. You're allowed to judge. It's fine.
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: Just don't be... You know, I can hate people on
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: my own. I don't need to spread that hate. I
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: don't need to, you know, make sure they know how
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: I feel every second. Like, who cares what I think? Like,
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: you know, if they like who they are, they like
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: who they are. I just am not compatible with you. Like,
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: that's it. And that's all right. That's fine.
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: That's a huge thing, dude. It's just like, it's okay to.
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: People like me for no reason.
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: People don't like me for no reason. So it's just
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: human nature. I'll like who I like and I won't
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: like who I don't like.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of the story. We're going to
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: I overheard my husband's phone call. One of his friends
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: is cheating.
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: Damn. Got a lot of digits on.
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: That, huh? Me, 35 female, and my husband, 37 male,
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: have been married for five years. He has a close
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: group of friends, all married. Over the years, I've become
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: friends with them and their wives, too. While we're not
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: extremely close, I love spending time with them. We go
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: on vacations together, have playdates with our kids, etc., A
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: few months ago, I was sitting in our living room
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: when I heard my husband having a heated conversation on
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: the phone with someone. He wasn't trying to be secretive
• 14:10
  Speaker 3: about it since he was talking loudly and hadn't closed
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: any doors. After a while, I realized he was talking
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: to one of his friends from this group. He was
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: saying things like, man, can't believe he did that, he's
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: an a-hole, what are we supposed to do, etc., By
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: the way, this comes from Keylephant, and if you want
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: okay story time subreddit. I'm Savannah.
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: And I'm Mike.
• 14:35
  Speaker 7: I'm Riley, and Mike's here today to read stories with us.
• 14:37
  Speaker 7: He's a good comedian friend of mine.
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: And we're going to talk about some stuff, get some advice,
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: but we don't have everything in our little brains. We're
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: only going to say what we know, but let us
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: know what you know in the comments. As Opie says,
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: after he hung up, I asked what was going on.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: My husband told me that one of friends had been
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: cheating on his wife. Apparently, it had been going on
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: for a while, and they had just found out. They
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: were planning to confront him about it. Of course, I
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: was shocked, angry, disappointed, and very, very sad for my friend.
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, big shocker. Big surprise. Hey, my husband cheated on me.
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: I'm sad. Dang.
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: She is such a sweet person, and all I could
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: think about was how she was going to feel when
• 15:23
  Speaker 3: she found out. A week passed, and my husband and
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: the rest of the friend group confronted him. They told
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: him they knew about the affair, asked him to stop,
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: and told him he needed to confess to his wife.
• 15:33
  Speaker 5: These are good friends. These are great friends.
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: Apparently, he was very upset and shocked that he'd been caught.
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: He said he was sorry for disappointing them and promised
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: to end the affair and tell his wife everything. When
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: my husband told me what had happened, I felt a
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: little relieved. Then more days passed. I occasionally asked my
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: husband if there were any updates, whether he knew if
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: his friend had done what he said he would. My
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: husband would answer, not as far as I know. Then
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: weeks passed, and summer was getting closer. We were supposed
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: to go on vacation with these people. Among all the wives,
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: I was the only one who knew about the situation,
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: as far as I'm aware. I asked my husband again
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: if there had been any news because I knew I
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: couldn't possibly look this woman in the eyes knowing what
• 16:18
  Speaker 3: her husband had done without telling her. My husband said no.
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: His friend still hadn't talked to his wife. Oh, this
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: guy's a... Nope. He's done. I'm telling her.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:29
  Speaker 6: Hey! Hey, Brittany!
• 16:30
  Speaker 5: How are you doing with all the bad news that's happened? Oh,
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: you don't know?
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: Like, oh my god, I'm so sorry about your husband.
• 16:38
  Speaker 4: What? Oh.
• 16:40
  Speaker 5: Exactly. That's exactly what I said.
• 16:42
  Speaker 3: His friend still hadn't talked to his wife. I told
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: him I didn't want to go on vacation with a cheater.
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: He said they couldn't exactly explain why without telling the wife,
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: and there was nothing they could do. Oh, my God.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Now you're all complicit.
• 16:54
  Speaker 5: Nothing they could do?
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: Okay, what would you guys do in this situation? Are
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: you telling your buddy or what?
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah. There's no question, dude. Well, I mean, I
• 17:02
  Speaker 4: don't know, dude. Here's the thing.
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: It's like, I don't want to get involved, but, like.
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because then, like, now it's just you become... You
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: become like roped into this.
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: It's like, oh, I'm angry at this. And you told me,
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: so I'm angry at you for telling me. It's like,
• 17:18
  Speaker 3: I just told you, girl.
• 17:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I'm just, don't shoot the messenger, baby. Yeah.
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: It was their marriage. And yes, I know it's their marriage.
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: It's not really my place to go tell her, but
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: I also can't go on this vacation. I don't want
• 17:31
  Speaker 3: to be around this man. And I don't want to
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: look this woman in the eye knowing what I know.
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: I feel like I would be betraying her. This vacation
• 17:38
  Speaker 3: is for the kids as much as it is for us.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: They love playing together and I don't want my child
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: to miss out on spending time with their friends.
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: Whose mom's a whore?
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: My husband insists it's none of our business. He says
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: they did everything they could as a friend group by
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: confronting him and telling him to come clean. He thinks
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: I'm being unreasonable by wanting to get more involved and
• 17:58
  Speaker 3: by refusing to go on the vacation. But I don't
• 18:01
  Speaker 3: think they've done enough as a friend group. Why is
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: a cheater still part of their circle? When I ask
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: my husband that, He says it's because the wife is
• 18:09
  Speaker 3: also part of the friend group and excluding her husband
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: would essentially reveal that he's been cheating. Why do you
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: not want to tell her?
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: It's like tell him at this point. This is starting
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: to snowball into something so much worse now.
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: It's like, oh, so I'm the bad guy now for
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: wanting to expose your friend who you should have exposed,
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: I don't know, months before when you found this out.
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: This is a masterclass in manipulation, dude.
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: Like, My God, everyone's complicit now.
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: Ah, dude, it's crazy.
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: So I told my husband that if they weren't willing
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: to do anything after all these months, I would go
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: talk to her myself. This led to a huge fight
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: between my husband and me. Am I being unreasonable? Am
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: I the a-hole for wanting to tell her I'm refusing
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: to go on this vacation? And there is an update. Uh, no,
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: you are not the a-hole for refu- Like, I- I'm sorry.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: I have declined invitations- where my friend has been with
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: this horrible person, and they're like, oh my God, come
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: out with us, or come over, or we're having a
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: game night, I will be like, sorry, no.
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: And that's you minding your business.
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: And that's me not wanting to, I want to save
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: face and be like, oh my God, hi, how are you?
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: When I don't like you, and I don't care, and
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: you cheated on my friend, and now I have to
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: act like everything's cool. No, actually, I hate you, and
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: I think you should go the F away.
• 19:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: There is an update. After reading some of the comments,
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: I decided to talk to my husband once more, this
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: time expressing my concerns that on vacation, things might explode
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: and this woman might find out about the cheating in
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: front of everyone else, and that wouldn't be great. I
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: also pointed out that if she actually doesn't know, her
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: health might be at risk since as far as we know,
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: the cheating is still ongoing. So I asked him to
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: go and speak to him again and explain that this
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: is important since we are all going on this vacation
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: together with our families. He listened to me and told
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: me that he would speak to him again. Before moving on,
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: I want to add that some people in this friend
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: group sometimes do business together. The cheating husband and my
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: husband were also recently doing some business together. Anyways, a
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: few days ago, my husband went to work and the
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: cheater was supposed to visit him. But that morning, my
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: husband told me he had a hunch. Because this person
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: was cheating on his wife and lying to her with
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: no sign of remorse, he thought, why not cheat in
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: business too?
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, he's cheating in every aspect of life, dude.
• 20:37
  Speaker 3: This guy is horrible. He's not your friend. He's not
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: a good partner. He's not a good dad. He's a
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: horrible person.
• 20:43
  Speaker 5: Not a good dad?
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what kind of role model is that to your children?
• 20:48
  Speaker 5: Oh, fair point.
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: There was a middleman handling the business they were doing together.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: He was the one finding the customers, etc. My husband
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: gave him a call to make sure about this because
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: he had a bad feeling, and he was right. As
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: far as I understand, the cheater was using my husband
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: to find customers, and after getting their contact information from
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: the middleman, he was contacting them directly and removing my
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: husband from the picture completely.
• 21:14
  Speaker 7: You know how much money he's probably lost from that?
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: This guy's horrible. It's so funny because now that it's
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: affecting OP's husband, now he's like, oh, I should probably
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: ruin his life, even though he ruined it before by cheating.
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: But now he's like, you know what? Now I have
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: a reason to tell him because I'm mad at him.
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: You should have been mad when he was cheating on her!
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: What?
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: Like, come on.
• 21:38
  Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: My husband found out about this that morning. So there
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: were now two things to talk about. When the CH visited,
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: there was a huge argument. My husband was trying to
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: make him admit to what he was doing. He also
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: said some things about how he was an a-hole for
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: cheating both in business and on his wife and that
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: he was a piece of crap for still not telling
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: his wife. And that's when things actually went crazy. The
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: cheater in the heat of the moment first let slip
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: the fact that actually two other people from their friend
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: group were also cheating on their wives.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: What?
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: What?
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: What?
• 22:19
  Speaker 5: That means your husband. Your husband statistically is also cheating
• 22:23
  Speaker 5: on you.
• 22:24
  Speaker 4: And this is getting pretty crazy. I like what this is.
• 22:26
  Speaker 4: I like this is some tea right here. This is
• 22:28
  Speaker 4: some tea.
• 22:29
  Speaker 3: So the people who commented about this possibility were spot on.
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: And they were basically keeping each other's secrets. The cheater
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: found out about these affairs after the friend group confronted
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: him about his cheating. The nerve of these people, right?
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: And apparently, according to the cheater, she already knew.
• 22:49
  Speaker 5: No, she didn't. No, she didn't. He's just saying that.
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: Yes, the wife. She knew all along, even before us.
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: She knew and she didn't say anything. Then she found
• 23:02
  Speaker 3: plane tickets to Bali... This little bee literally bought plane
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: tickets to Bali for himself and the person he's cheating
• 23:10
  Speaker 3: with and paid for them using the card he shared
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: with his wife. I was speechless. She couldn't take it
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: anymore and confronted him. But for some reason, they are
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: still together. At least they're still married. Whatever. Anyways, after
• 23:28
  Speaker 3: exploding and blurting all of this out, he left. Of course,
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: the business they were doing together is over now. My
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: husband came home that evening and told me all of this.
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: He said he was feeling sick thinking that three of
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: his close friends were cheating on their wives. But of course,
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: he wasn't completely sure, so he talked to the other
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: two friends later on to confirm it. And yes, they
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: were cheating too.
• 23:52
  Speaker 4: Oh, holy... Oh.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: My God, it's horrible. Horrible friends.
• 23:58
  Speaker 4: God, these guys sound like terrible people.
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: One of them was getting a divorce. The other one's
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: wife was aware, but I don't know, and I don't
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: want to know about their situation. Anyways, only one other
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: friend and his wife are left in this friend group
• 24:12
  Speaker 3: that we're on good terms with now. It got really
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: messy really quickly. I'm honestly relieved. There was no need
• 24:19
  Speaker 3: for me to get involved. I'm, of course, feeling sorry
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: for these women. I really am. Maybe I'll give them
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: a call after a little more time has passed to
• 24:27
  Speaker 3: ask how they're doing. But for now, I don't want
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: to get involved at all. They are all grown adults,
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: and it seems like they're all aware of everything. Also,
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: of course, the vacation is canceled. My husband has stopped
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: talking to the three of them. We will be having
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: a smaller vacation with just the three of us, me
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: and my husband and our kid.
• 24:46
  Speaker 4: Ooh, they're rich.
• 24:47
  Speaker 5: They only have one kid. Mikey, how you feeling about
• 24:49
  Speaker 5: this story?
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: Man, this is a juicy, this is a jam-packed story
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: from top to bottom, dude.
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: I didn't expect this outcome when I first posted this
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: at all. But I guess you never know what goes
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: on inside people's homes. I am still very much shocked.
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: My husband is not feeling very well. He has been
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: questioning all of his friendships. But I guess people change
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: as they grow up and these kinds of things can
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: happen with long-term friendships. Anyways, once again, thanks everyone. And
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: there's a last minute edit. Since some people have been asking,
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: I do have confirmation about the cheater's wife knowing for sure.
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: And the other couple is definitely getting a divorce. The
• 25:25
  Speaker 3: only one I'm not completely sure about is the third wife.
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: But the truth will probably come out sooner than later,
• 25:31
  Speaker 3: the way things have been going lately. If not, I
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: will call her.
• 25:35
  Speaker 4: That was crazy. I thought that was going to be
• 25:37
  Speaker 4: like a scenario.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: Oh, they were all in on it.
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 25:40
  Speaker 5: Dude, we have read some crazy.
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: Oh, dude, this one was a really good story.
• 25:45
  Speaker 5: This one was good.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: This one's crazy. There's twists and turns everywhere.
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: God. Yeah, my bad. My bad. We like having a
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: little whimsy, dude.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of the story. We're going to
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one.
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: My friend invited me to his wedding and expected me
• 26:03
  Speaker 4: to set up and clean up.
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: No, actually, I'm not the venue.
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: I was recently a groomsman at a destination wedding. First,
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: I want to say I still love the couple, have
• 26:15
  Speaker 4: no hard feelings, and overall had a great time. I'm
• 26:18
  Speaker 4: just curious how others would view this situation. We were
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: asked to be groomsmen about five months ago. I hosted
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: the four-day bachelor party at a family lake house where
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: everyone flew in from out of state. I covered the
• 26:30
  Speaker 4: groom's food, and there were no lodgings or entertainment costs.
• 26:34
  Speaker 4: The wedding was at a country club. Ooh, fancy. My
• 26:37
  Speaker 4: wife and I spent over $ 3, 000 between flights, rental cars, outfits, lodging, golf, gifts.
• 26:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, the whole nine yards. There you go. And
• 26:46
  Speaker 4: other expenses. Dang.
• 26:48
  Speaker 5: That's not bad, though, for $ 3, 000.
• 26:50
  Speaker 4: Well, it required a five-hour flight and a three-hour drive.
• 26:56
  Speaker 4: We were told to arrive Thursday because the Airbnb and
• 26:59
  Speaker 4: there were weekend activities planned. The groom didn't arrive until
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: 11.30 p.m., so everyone just sat around. The Airbnb had
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: no AC and was 82 degrees inside. Oh, God. Two
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: days before the wedding, we got a text saying the
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: groomsmen were expected to set up the reception at 10am
• 27:18
  Speaker 4: on the wedding day. We helped, but it meant carrying
• 27:21
  Speaker 4: roughly 200 pound tables, 160 chairs.
• 27:25
  Speaker 5: What the heck?
• 27:26
  Speaker 3: They not have, they didn't, like the venue doesn't have
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: people to do that. They don't, you know, hire anyone.
• 27:31
  Speaker 5: Oh, they do, the groomsmen.
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: That's not a thing.
• 27:34
  Speaker 5: They are at the venue. That's a part of the venue.
• 27:37
  Speaker 4: The groom stayed back at the Airbnb, which I understand,
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: but I couldn't help wondering why a 30,000 plus wedding
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: didn't hire the rental company to do setups. By the way,
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: this comes from you slash Fanatic Freedom. And if you
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: want to submit your own stories, go to r slash
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: OK Storytime subreddit. My name's Mike.
• 27:55
  Speaker 3: And I'm Savannah.
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: I'm Riley.
• 27:57
  Speaker 7: And Mike is my good comedy friend. He's going to
• 27:59
  Speaker 7: read this story and read this with us goofily.
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's true, Riley. But also, too, like, we don't, like,
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: we're here to, like, give advice, but we don't know
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: all the answers.
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know anything.
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, dude. So, like, I mean, if you got something
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: that you know, send it in the comments down below.
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: That's all you got to do. Exactly. Uh, so as
• 28:16
  Speaker 4: OP says, uh, we finished around 1130 AM, had no
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: lunch and only an hour to get ready for photos.
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: We asked who was tearing everything down after the wedding.
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: And the groom said he'd tell the coordinator we couldn't
• 28:30
  Speaker 4: do it or the family could handle it the next day.
• 28:33
  Speaker 4: An hour before the ceremony, the coordinator emphasized that everything
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: had to be cleaned up that night. The groom remembered,
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: quote unquote, the venue had told them that during the tour,
• 28:44
  Speaker 4: we told him not to worry and to enjoy getting married.
• 28:47
  Speaker 4: We stepped aside and agreed that we weren't moving heavy
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: tables after drinking, that we had to wake up at
• 28:52
  Speaker 4: four to eight in the morning to make it to
• 28:54
  Speaker 4: the airport on time. If the country club's bills the
• 28:58
  Speaker 4: bride's dad who owns six plus houses, then so be it.
• 29:02
  Speaker 4: The wedding was great. We danced, celebrated, and had fun.
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: Good for you. At the end of the night, I
• 29:07
  Speaker 4: wanted to head back with my pregnant wife who had
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: pushed herself to stay until the end. I was wasted,
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: but not wasted, according to my wife. Instead, the groom's
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: mom asked me to help because I was young and able-bodied.
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: The groom's man asked why I wasn't helping.
• 29:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, sounded like they saved themselves about $ 2, 500.
• 29:25
  Speaker 7: That's just, like, insane.
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: The fact that they are spending $ 30, 000 on a wedding
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: and then also spending, like, you can't spend one more ounce,
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: you know, when you have six.
• 29:40
  Speaker 6: Houses.
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: You can't hire a, you know, load-in, load-out crew. People
• 29:46
  Speaker 3: do that. There's businesses specifically for that.
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: So.
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: Also, I don't know why the venue doesn't have anyone
• 29:52
  Speaker 3: to do that. That's so stupid to request like the
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: family and friends at the wedding to be like, oh,
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: by the way, make sure you don't get too wasted
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: because you gotta clean up. It's like, I'm not going
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: to move a table. I'm sorry. I'm not going to
• 30:06
  Speaker 3: pick up a chair. The only thing I'm taking home
• 30:08
  Speaker 3: is probably some of the cake and I don't know,
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: maybe a bottle to sleep with.
• 30:13
  Speaker 4: I sarcastically and loudly replied, That I was too wasted
• 30:17
  Speaker 4: to be carrying 200 pound tables and that my kid
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: at home deserved a dad who didn't get hurt. I
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: tried to move a table anyway. It dropped hard and
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: the other guys got mad, yelled at me to just leave.
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: One said I was being a bad friend for not
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: doing what needed to be done. I've only met these
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: guys once and won't see them again. I felt bad afterwards.
• 30:39
  Speaker 4: But I also come from a culture where the wedding
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: party are treated as honored guests, not unpaid labor.
• 30:45
  Speaker 6: That's what I'm saying.
• 30:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: You can, like, I mean, at the end of my
• 30:49
  Speaker 3: brother's wedding, everyone, like, helped to, like, you know, get, like,
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: the food in place and all that. But no one
• 30:54
  Speaker 3: was moving chairs, moving tables. Like, we were taking down
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: a little bit of the decorations. But, like, nothing to where, like,
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: all right, this place has got to be spotless.
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: If we'd been told up front that setup and teardown
• 31:07
  Speaker 4: were expected, then that would be fine. Or I would
• 31:10
  Speaker 4: even help pay for the cleanup crew. Now we're talking.
• 31:14
  Speaker 4: These guys don't have kids or wives, so maybe I'd
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: be more flexible in a different life stage. I'll see
• 31:20
  Speaker 4: the groom in a couple of months, and I expect
• 31:22
  Speaker 4: everything will be fine. I'm wondering whether my behavior was unreasonable,
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: and what would you have done? And that is our story.
• 31:31
  Speaker 3: I really don't think that they should have... Like, it's
• 31:35
  Speaker 3: just the communication here sucked. And then on another note,
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: just you shouldn't expect your guests to now clean up
• 31:43
  Speaker 3: your wedding party after celebrating and going through this whole day. Like,
• 31:49
  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know what culture they are, but
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: sometimes it's multiple days.
• 31:52
  Speaker 4: But.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: even in just, you know, American culture, I guess, going
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: through a whole day of doing everything, dressing up, being in,
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: you know, probably uncomfortable clothes, whatever, eating, drinking.
• 32:02
  Speaker 4: I like to dress up, though.
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: No, I do like to dress up, too. Yeah, but
• 32:06
  Speaker 3: if it's uncomfortable, like, I'm taking my shoes off. I'm
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: not wearing heels all day. Don't even ask me. You know,
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: and the fact that he was like, oh, by the way,
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: tomorrow you're going to clean up after all of us.
• 32:17
  Speaker 3: I'm like, that's so funny. You got me on that one.
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: I'll see you next month. Like, no, I'm not doing that.
• 32:25
  Speaker 3: And I think kind of everyone sucks here. I think
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: a little bit OP or the a-hole for kind of
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: like knowing that you had to do this, but then
• 32:33
  Speaker 3: being like, ah, I'm not doing this anymore.
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: Bye.
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: You know, like I would feel if I was the
• 32:37
  Speaker 3: other groomsmen, I'd be like, okay, screw this guy, you know, whatever.
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: Also, but I think too, OP, that all that matters
• 32:45
  Speaker 4: is like, you know, you had fun, you know, it
• 32:48
  Speaker 4: was your special day, you know, You got to do
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: whatever you got to dance, you know, party with friends, family,
• 32:55
  Speaker 4: you know, as that shouldn't it shouldn't be like don't
• 32:59
  Speaker 4: let that like a little stint like ruin what like
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: the good times that you're having. You know what I mean? Opie,
• 33:06
  Speaker 4: I don't think you're that you're the a-hole. But honestly, yeah,
• 33:08
  Speaker 4: do some research next time, bro. Like that's all you
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: need to do.
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of the story. We're going to
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one.
• 33:15
  Speaker 4: My friend wanted me to quit my job for her
• 33:19
  Speaker 4: due date.
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: Well, which is more important, baby or money?
• 33:23
  Speaker 4: My oldest friend is pregnant with her second child. I'm
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: the godmother of the older one, and we have a
• 33:29
  Speaker 4: very good relationship, but I live about six hours away.
• 33:33
  Speaker 4: My friend has a hard time dealing with unpredictable situations.
• 33:36
  Speaker 4: I offered to come and support her from the get-go,
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: but also made clear that I have an important job
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: right around the due date. I'm a freelancer, and that
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: is a yearly job I've been doing for a long time.
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: It's not so much about the money anyways, but it
• 33:50
  Speaker 4: means a lot to me and really is like a
• 33:53
  Speaker 4: home that exists just once a year. Amen, brother. So
• 33:56
  Speaker 4: in her early pregnancy, I offered to come right after
• 33:59
  Speaker 4: that job and stay for a week to support them.
• 34:02
  Speaker 4: She's been trying to plan the birth itself and struggled
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: with the fact that she doesn't seem to have a
• 34:06
  Speaker 4: network around her that she wants to trust with her kid.
• 34:11
  Speaker 4: She has a very specific idea of how everything should
• 34:13
  Speaker 4: go down.
• 34:14
  Speaker 7: Want the baby to be 10 pounds, one ounce, and
• 34:17
  Speaker 7: I want it to be in labor for under three hours.
• 34:20
  Speaker 4: She would like to get into the hospital with her
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: husband and wants him to stay with her for three
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: days while the older one stays home with somebody that
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: she trusts. While that is possible where I live, it's
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: not guaranteed, and maybe not ideal for the older one either.
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from u slash realistic elephant 46,
• 34:39
  Speaker 4: and if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 34:40
  Speaker 4: to r slash ok story time subreddit, My name's Mike.
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: I'm Savannah.
• 34:44
  Speaker 5: I'm Riley. And Mike is my good comedian friend. He's
• 34:47
  Speaker 5: going to be here to help us read this story.
• 34:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, we're here to give advice, but we don't have
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: all the answers. So if you guys have any advice
• 34:56
  Speaker 4: that you'd like to give, go and leave it down
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: in the comments below. But other than that, as OP says,
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: originally the grandparents were supposed to stay with the kid,
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: but my friend just broke off contact with them. So
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: I moved into focus. Mind you, There are neighbors around
• 35:12
  Speaker 4: who offered to babysit. There is another godparent that I
• 35:15
  Speaker 4: had to remind her of that offered help. There are
• 35:19
  Speaker 4: a bunch of friends that might not be as close
• 35:21
  Speaker 4: with the kid, but there's still time to build that
• 35:23
  Speaker 4: three more months from now, and that debate has been
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: going on for a while. and they could also stay
• 35:28
  Speaker 4: with her in the hospital while her husband stays with
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: the child for some time. The kid is in childcare too,
• 35:33
  Speaker 4: and there is even a professional babysitter coming around regularly.
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: And of course, nobody knows when the kid is coming anyways.
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: I would be fine to come before or after the job.
• 35:43
  Speaker 4: I've even been postponing to book my holidays because I
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: want it to be flexible, and I'm not quite sure
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: how she imagines me to get there anyways. Again, I'm
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: six hours away. We couldn't really discuss that because after
• 35:55
  Speaker 4: she broke off contact with the grandparents, everything went really fast.
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: She asked me to cancel my contract with the job
• 36:01
  Speaker 4: over the phone, offering to cover my financial loss, and
• 36:04
  Speaker 4: sent me a super emotionally manipulative message afterwards. Some quotes.
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: Your boss won't be standing at your grave. The fortune
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: of my family depends on you. Your godchild will be
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: forever damaged if you don't come. Man, there it is.
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: Holy cow!
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: That is unhinged, dude.
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: Just because I can't make the birth of your child,
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry. I guess throw me in the brig.
• 36:30
  Speaker 4: She's six hours away. What do you expect her to do?
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: And also, you have a life outside of that. And
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: she can come and visit literally any time. Usually, this
• 36:39
  Speaker 3: is the other way around. Everyone wants to come see
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: the baby, and they're all like, no, only two people
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: can come or something. Now it's just like, no one's coming.
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: I need someone there. But it's like, I don't know
• 36:48
  Speaker 3: why you put me in those plans.
• 36:50
  Speaker 4: We got some more of this story. So OP says,
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: I told her to hold her horses and that I
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: would take my time to think about it. She seemed
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: to understand and told me I should take my decision freely,
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: which I did. I offered to think about solutions together,
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: but that I wouldn't cancel my contract. She's been blocking
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: me for a week. I see her despair, and I
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: feel horrible for her. I just don't think that I'm
• 37:14
  Speaker 4: the flying savior. I've decided to drive there now because
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: the emergency situation is here now, not later. Am I
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: the a-hole? Um, no, I don't think you are. I think, uh.
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: Why would you be the a-hole?
• 37:29
  Speaker 7: At this point, she's just being reinforced that she's doing
• 37:32
  Speaker 7: something wrong. And her friend needs to chill out.
• 37:34
  Speaker 5: You had one baby. Do I need to drop everything
• 37:37
  Speaker 5: every time you get knocked up?
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, also, too, like, I think, like, all you
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: guys do, all you guys got to do is work
• 37:43
  Speaker 4: out a schedule, you know? Like, hey, I can't work
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: here this day, that day, which I'm pretty sure she
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: already did because she was talking about, like, the job.
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: It's just crazy to compare any of what she did
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: to anything.
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: Like.
• 37:57
  Speaker 4: It's not making sense. It literally is not making sense.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: No, it's not. And this girl's being so dramatic. Focus
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: on what you do have. What is there? Not, you know, oh,
• 38:06
  Speaker 3: now I have to hold this over my friend's head.
• 38:08
  Speaker 3: How dare she make me do that?
• 38:10
  Speaker 6: Like, what?
• 38:11
  Speaker 3: Like, come on. Be so for real. You're having a baby.
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: Be happy that you're having this baby. Focus on that. Like,
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: she's eventually going to come and see it. She doesn't
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: have to be there in the room. I mean, come on.
• 38:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, just, you know, work something out. Work something out with,
• 38:25
  Speaker 4: you know, with your sister, you know. Just be like, yo,
• 38:27
  Speaker 4: you know. I mean, I don't even know, like, hopefully
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: your job offer didn't get canceled or get canned. But, yeah, dude,
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: just be there for the baby when you can. In
• 38:37
  Speaker 4: the meantime, just do you. Live your life, you know.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one.
• 38:45
  Speaker 6: Hey, Keon here. We're going to get back to the stories,
• 38:47
  Speaker 6: but here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 38:49
  Speaker 8: My wife cooks the same three meals on repeat and
• 38:52
  Speaker 8: I'm tired of it.
• 38:53
  Speaker 6: I want something different.
• 38:55
  Speaker 8: My wife, 24 female, and I, 24 male, have been
• 38:58
  Speaker 8: acquaintances slash friends since we were 12 years old.
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 39:02
  Speaker 6: Wow.
• 39:03
  Speaker 3: Dated for a year, then married for two. No kids.
• 39:06
  Speaker 8: I'm a successful software dev. She stays at home and
• 39:09
  Speaker 8: cares for our fur babies and cooks and cleans. I
• 39:12
  Speaker 8: love her so much and we're very open about and
• 39:15
  Speaker 8: invested in working through problems. She probably does 80-90% of
• 39:19
  Speaker 8: the regular housework, all laundry, dishes, pet cleanup. However, with
• 39:24
  Speaker 8: any kind of weekly deep cleaning and catch up, I
• 39:26
  Speaker 8: try to lead it and do more than my share.
• 39:28
  Speaker 8: I know she still does way more at home than me,
• 39:31
  Speaker 8: and I have been so thankful that she does it
• 39:33
  Speaker 8: so happily. I make a decent amount of money. I
• 39:36
  Speaker 8: got my first six-figure salary at 23 after having to
• 39:39
  Speaker 8: drop out of college after freshman year. It was a
• 39:42
  Speaker 8: lot of luck and a lot of hard work. It
• 39:44
  Speaker 8: was almost compulsive how much time I spent on getting
• 39:47
  Speaker 8: better at it. Now I make 120K and I've got
• 39:50
  Speaker 8: my career figured out. We are very lucky and we
• 39:52
  Speaker 8: live a pretty happy life. She's constantly online shopping for makeup,
• 39:55
  Speaker 8: everything from e.l.f.
• 39:56
  Speaker 4: To Mac.
• 39:57
  Speaker 8: She can buy whatever she wants. She definitely limits herself
• 40:00
  Speaker 8: in budgets, but it's constant. Every week she's buying something.
• 40:05
  Speaker 8: By the way, this comes from Fresh Username. And if
• 40:08
  Speaker 8: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 40:10
  Speaker 8: r slash ok story time subreddit.
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 40:13
  Speaker 6: I'm Keon.
• 40:13
  Speaker 8: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 40:15
  Speaker 8: don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd do.
• 40:17
  Speaker 8: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 40:20
  Speaker 8: And Opie says she never finished her community college degree.
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: She was never.
• 40:24
  Speaker 8: Invested in the career and just fumbled through. She worked
• 40:27
  Speaker 8: at Starbucks and other various minimum wage positions, but they
• 40:31
  Speaker 8: seem to just cause more harm than help. Driving 20
• 40:34
  Speaker 8: minutes at 5 a.m. to make $ 8 an hour at
• 40:36
  Speaker 8: a place with tons of drama is That would just
• 40:39
  Speaker 8: exacerbate her depression and anxiety. Not to mention it never
• 40:43
  Speaker 8: even made a dent in the overall budget. So she
• 40:46
  Speaker 8: decided to become a stay-at-home wife. I'm happy with it
• 40:48
  Speaker 8: because things like cooking at home will help our budget.
• 40:51
  Speaker 8: We're terrible about eating out and budgeting, so I figured
• 40:54
  Speaker 8: her devoting time to cooking and shopping would help. I
• 40:57
  Speaker 8: really want her to go back to school and do
• 40:59
  Speaker 8: something she really does care about and find a career
• 41:03
  Speaker 8: if that's what she wants. We just have to get
• 41:05
  Speaker 8: our debt under control first.
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: Today.
• 41:07
  Speaker 8: Our bank account is completely overdrawn every week. We never
• 41:12
  Speaker 8: eat at home unless we have to. All of our
• 41:15
  Speaker 8: expenses fit well within our budget, but we never plan
• 41:17
  Speaker 8: for food. We budget a reasonable grocery budget, then promptly
• 41:21
  Speaker 8: spend it all and more on takeout. Basically, takeout fills
• 41:24
  Speaker 8: a large part of the money that should be going
• 41:25
  Speaker 8: into the emergency fund or some other bill. So here's
• 41:28
  Speaker 8: the cycle. I get fed up with the financial situation
• 41:32
  Speaker 8: and we swear we're going to do better and eat
• 41:34
  Speaker 8: at home more. We make no meal plan, but she's
• 41:37
  Speaker 8: always adamant that she'll cook any time. When that time
• 41:40
  Speaker 8: rolls around, it's usually a choice between spaghetti with meat sauce,
• 41:43
  Speaker 8: cubed steak, and rice-a-roni crockpot barbecue chicken. No vegetables, no
• 41:49
  Speaker 8: sides that aren't boxed food, so we defer and eat out.
• 41:52
  Speaker 8: And we keep doing it, even when we really shouldn't.
• 41:55
  Speaker 8: I've confronted her about it, only for her to not
• 41:57
  Speaker 8: really do anything. She added frozen broccoli or corn once
• 42:01
  Speaker 8: or twice. I tried taking over a few nights and
• 42:04
  Speaker 8: cooking different things to show her my process.
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 42:07
  Speaker 8: And that it's really not that bad to find and
• 42:08
  Speaker 8: try new things. So he can cook.
• 42:10
  Speaker 6: So yeah, OP. OP's the one who pushes for more
• 42:14
  Speaker 6: vegetables than her, which is crazy.
• 42:15
  Speaker 8: Yeah, it is a little crazy that OP's out here
• 42:17
  Speaker 8: having to cook and work full time again when.
• 42:21
  Speaker 3: She's a stay-at-home mom.
• 42:22
  Speaker 6: I just want some vegetables.
• 42:25
  Speaker 8: Yeah. I've tried helping her make a master recipe list
• 42:28
  Speaker 8: or meal plan, but it always falls apart. I'm at
• 42:31
  Speaker 8: that point where I feel the need to take it
• 42:33
  Speaker 8: over and just fix it because this is ridiculous.
• 42:35
  Speaker 6: Well, you know what you do?
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: And this is weaponized incompetence.
• 42:37
  Speaker 6: Yeah, weaponized incompetence.
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: What do you do?
• 42:41
  Speaker 6: Also, if this is really the case of we're really
• 42:44
  Speaker 6: at our wits end with our budgeting, stop buying stupid stuff.
• 42:48
  Speaker 6: Stop buying the new makeup stuff. I don't know what
• 42:50
  Speaker 6: you're buying too, OP, but.
• 42:52
  Speaker 8: Well, I feel like you kind of tell her, hey,
• 42:54
  Speaker 8: if you're not going to cook and help me budget, then...
• 42:59
  Speaker 8: You really shouldn't, not that you can tell her what
• 43:01
  Speaker 8: to do, but you should be like, you really shouldn't
• 43:03
  Speaker 8: be buying all this makeup stuff because we're eating out
• 43:05
  Speaker 8: so much.
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 43:06
  Speaker 6: It's kind of one or the other. Sorry, your makeup
• 43:08
  Speaker 6: fund is going into now the takeout fund.
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: It's like.
• 43:12
  Speaker 6: I mean, yeah, you can't get both now. You get
• 43:15
  Speaker 6: one or the other because we need to start saving.
• 43:17
  Speaker 8: And you don't have to present that as like, I'm
• 43:20
  Speaker 8: not allowing you. Just saying, hey, we just don't have
• 43:22
  Speaker 8: the funds for that anymore. So it's either we cook or.
• 43:27
  Speaker 6: We have to cut back.
• 43:28
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 43:28
  Speaker 6: Just make a salad. Even a salad's easy.
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: Cooking's not that hard.
• 43:32
  Speaker 8: We make great money, have a super roomy budget, possibly
• 43:35
  Speaker 8: part of the problem, and we live attached to a
• 43:37
  Speaker 8: grocery store for F's sake. You're attached to a grocery store?
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: Come on.
• 43:43
  Speaker 8: But here we are again. A couple weeks ago, I
• 43:45
  Speaker 8: jumped in and took over budget, and we got back
• 43:48
  Speaker 8: on track. Our account was positive and everything was fine.
• 43:51
  Speaker 8: Then this sent us right back. And this morning, she asks,
• 43:54
  Speaker 8: so if we get paid, can I buy makeup?
• 43:56
  Speaker 4: Seriously? There it is.
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: And then you say no.
• 43:58
  Speaker 6: And you say no.
• 43:59
  Speaker 3: We don't have money for makeup. Sorry.
• 44:01
  Speaker 8: If you want to buy makeup, go get a job.
• 44:03
  Speaker 8: Our account is completely overdrawn. We have bills due and
• 44:07
  Speaker 8: there's no way we can make our account positive with
• 44:10
  Speaker 8: this check. Trying to figure out what to get at lunch.
• 44:13
  Speaker 8: There's almost no food in the house. I'm fed up
• 44:16
  Speaker 8: with choosing between takeout and whatever she chooses to throw together.
• 44:19
  Speaker 8: And all she can think about is more makeup. I
• 44:23
  Speaker 8: almost lost my mind.
• 44:24
  Speaker 6: Yeah, you know what?
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: Okay, honey.
• 44:26
  Speaker 6: I'm going to get food, and that's going to be
• 44:28
  Speaker 6: for me.
• 44:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 44:29
  Speaker 6: Your makeup, I guess you're eating that for dinner.
• 44:31
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I think you just start saying, like, you can
• 44:34
  Speaker 8: choose between makeup or food.
• 44:36
  Speaker 6: What's more important? And I have a very bad feeling
• 44:40
  Speaker 6: she'll go, makeup, obviously. I don't know.
• 44:43
  Speaker 8: Maybe this is the kind of thing where you say,
• 44:46
  Speaker 8: here's your budget. Here's the money that I will give
• 44:48
  Speaker 8: you to spend how you would like. Once that is gone.
• 44:52
  Speaker 6: It's like when you give money to a kid and
• 44:54
  Speaker 6: you're like, do you want the toy now? Or you
• 44:55
  Speaker 6: get to save it and you can get more money
• 44:58
  Speaker 6: for later. And obviously, most of the time, the kid
• 45:02
  Speaker 6: is going to go, now?
• 45:04
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 45:04
  Speaker 8: And that's kind of the problem because I feel like
• 45:07
  Speaker 8: a lot of my suggestions kind of infantilize her. I'm like, oh,
• 45:10
  Speaker 8: you can treat her like a child, teaching her how
• 45:12
  Speaker 8: to use her money.
• 45:13
  Speaker 6: But sometimes you have to.
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: She just doesn't know how to use money at all.
• 45:17
  Speaker 8: I mean, kind of neither do you, if we've gotten
• 45:20
  Speaker 8: to this point.
• 45:22
  Speaker 3: But yeah, this is his money.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 45:25
  Speaker 8: I told her she shouldn't and that we need to
• 45:26
  Speaker 8: get our bank account together. She claims it's also because
• 45:29
  Speaker 8: of things we spend on together, not just the food.
• 45:32
  Speaker 8: I tried to tell her how our core process isn't working.
• 45:36
  Speaker 8: We get along incredibly emotionally, but completely terrible at this
• 45:40
  Speaker 8: whole life skills thing. She takes it personally and says,
• 45:42
  Speaker 8: I'm making her feel terrible that she doesn't do enough.
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: Well, you don't.
• 45:47
  Speaker 8: I tell her that normal people eat balanced meals and
• 45:50
  Speaker 8: cook at home much more often. She gets pissed because
• 45:52
  Speaker 8: that's just the way she was brought up. And I'm
• 45:54
  Speaker 8: apparently stuck up for wanting balance and variety. She says
• 45:58
  Speaker 8: she already does the laundry, takes care of the dog
• 46:01
  Speaker 8: and rabbit, takes care of our bills and errands, our
• 46:05
  Speaker 8: once or twice weekly shopping trip next door, and cleans.
• 46:09
  Speaker 8: and that I have way too high of expectations for
• 46:11
  Speaker 8: her because I keep asking for more. I don't want
• 46:13
  Speaker 8: to be the controlling husband or otherwise assume she should
• 46:16
  Speaker 8: do something because she's the wife. Just pick up during
• 46:19
  Speaker 8: the day. Trash, dishes, directly dirty things.
• 46:22
  Speaker 3: So she's not even doing that!
• 46:24
  Speaker 8: Cook sometimes, me and the budget are okay with eating
• 46:27
  Speaker 8: out a few times a week, and feed and take
• 46:29
  Speaker 8: out the pets. I love her more than anything in
• 46:31
  Speaker 8: the world, and she's the reason I'm able to get
• 46:33
  Speaker 8: out of bed and deal with my anxiety to get
• 46:35
  Speaker 8: through the day. But it's hurting me to watch this
• 46:38
  Speaker 8: happen week in and week out over something that's so
• 46:42
  Speaker 8: basic and wouldn't be much trouble to fix.
• 46:44
  Speaker 6: That's crazy.
• 46:45
  Speaker 4: Okay. Yeah.
• 46:46
  Speaker 6: Very good on you to be like, she's the reason
• 46:47
  Speaker 6: I get up in the morning and like very happy.
• 46:50
  Speaker 6: But then you come back home and you're like, but
• 46:52
  Speaker 6: the bank account is giving me anxiety.
• 46:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 46:54
  Speaker 6: Why is it giving me anxiety? Oh, because yes, you,
• 46:57
  Speaker 6: partially you, OP, but also her.
• 47:00
  Speaker 8: Yeah, she's the reason I'm able to deal with my
• 47:02
  Speaker 8: anxiety that she brings me.
• 47:04
  Speaker 6: It's like the Ouroboros, the snake eating itself.
• 47:07
  Speaker 4: Yes, literally.
• 47:08
  Speaker 8: And it is a source of a lot of anxiety
• 47:10
  Speaker 8: for me. I'm sorry if a lot of this was
• 47:12
  Speaker 8: a rant, but I really need to talk about this
• 47:14
  Speaker 8: to someone other than her. I feel like for her
• 47:16
  Speaker 8: to do anything right, I have to intervene. I feel
• 47:19
  Speaker 8: like I'm not worth more than a half-butted attempt at.
• 47:22
  Speaker 3: Her end of the responsibilities.
• 47:24
  Speaker 8: She feels like I'm never satisfied and that I'm asking
• 47:27
  Speaker 8: too much.
• 47:28
  Speaker 6: You're never going to be satisfied.
• 47:29
  Speaker 3: She's never going to be satisfied.
• 47:31
  Speaker 6: Eliza.
• 47:33
  Speaker 8: And we both agree that neither of us made our
• 47:35
  Speaker 8: expectations of a regular couple very clear from the beginning.
• 47:38
  Speaker 6: Oh my gosh. Opie's Alexander Hamilton.
• 47:40
  Speaker 8: Opie's Alexander Hamilton.
• 47:43
  Speaker 3: But we do have an edit.
• 47:45
  Speaker 8: I fear this is what happens when you get married
• 47:48
  Speaker 8: after a year and didn't live together.
• 47:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 47:51
  Speaker 6: Or like two, like, yeah. How has this never come
• 47:54
  Speaker 6: up before?
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: But they've only been married for.
• 47:57
  Speaker 6: But they've been together for three years total.
• 47:59
  Speaker 8: Two years married. And it seems like this has been
• 48:02
  Speaker 8: an ongoing issue for maybe those two years.
• 48:04
  Speaker 6: And OP, I feel like you bring up the problem,
• 48:05
  Speaker 6: she doesn't care, and then you just let it continue.
• 48:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, OP's like, well, that's it. I brought it up.
• 48:10
  Speaker 6: I tried my best here.
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: Bummer.
• 48:13
  Speaker 8: Like, this needs to be a sit-down, serious conversation... Saying,
• 48:17
  Speaker 8: I can't do it like this anymore.
• 48:19
  Speaker 6: Truly.
• 48:20
  Speaker 3: We don't have money.
• 48:22
  Speaker 6: The fact that you're making six figures and you are.
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: Overdrafting.
• 48:26
  Speaker 6: What are you spending your money on?
• 48:29
  Speaker 3: Food and makeup, it seems.
• 48:31
  Speaker 8: Edit. Yes, there are other poor financial decisions. We have YNAB,
• 48:36
  Speaker 8: which is a budgeting tool. I try every week to
• 48:38
  Speaker 8: get us back into it. Complications, depression, and anxiety for both.
• 48:42
  Speaker 8: She is very picky about food. Her upbringing included very plain,
• 48:46
  Speaker 8: repeatable meals.
• 48:47
  Speaker 6: And there it is. Could never be me.
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: This was typed pretty hastily and didn't have a ton
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: of time.
• 48:54
  Speaker 8: I'm at work, but it's given me so much anxiety
• 48:56
  Speaker 8: I can't think about anything else. If there's anything I
• 48:59
  Speaker 8: can elaborate on or rework, I would be more than
• 49:01
  Speaker 8: happy to. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. And we
• 49:05
  Speaker 8: do have an edit, too. My family was really bad
• 49:08
  Speaker 8: about overdrafting before I moved out. My mom passed when
• 49:11
  Speaker 8: I was 22, and things at my house went to
• 49:15
  Speaker 8: crap as I was the breadwinner and they took advantage
• 49:18
  Speaker 8: of it.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: I was only making $ 50, 000.
• 49:20
  Speaker 8: Then and i never had any money just went into
• 49:23
  Speaker 8: that black hole so i moved out i made the
• 49:25
  Speaker 8: mistake of not getting all my crap together then and
• 49:28
  Speaker 8: left with an overdrawn bank account combine that with an
• 49:30
  Speaker 8: ever skyrocketing salary since then and wonder at my newfound
• 49:35
  Speaker 8: money that i could actually spend it was easy to
• 49:37
  Speaker 8: make stupid spending decisions And sink into that old habit
• 49:41
  Speaker 8: my family had. It pissed me off so much then,
• 49:44
  Speaker 8: but it's easy to ignore the signs that you're being
• 49:46
  Speaker 8: just as careless when your income just keeps ratcheting up
• 49:50
  Speaker 8: with your spending.
• 49:51
  Speaker 6: Dang, you just, so you never stopped living this life.
• 49:54
  Speaker 8: So it is also OP, which is what I thought,
• 49:57
  Speaker 8: because I was like, there's no way that they're overdrafting
• 50:01
  Speaker 8: if OP is also not bad with.
• 50:02
  Speaker 3: Money, you know?
• 50:03
  Speaker 6: Yeah, OP, I think obviously you are part of the problem,
• 50:07
  Speaker 6: but yeah, this is not good.
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: No.
• 50:10
  Speaker 8: So yeah, we have bad family histories, and our upbringing
• 50:13
  Speaker 8: was generally terrible. We know how stupid it is. We've
• 50:17
  Speaker 8: created a black hole for our own family, and the
• 50:19
  Speaker 8: only thing to do is to just fix it. We
• 50:21
  Speaker 8: know how. We have the tools. We will do it.
• 50:25
  Speaker 8: We've got a final update.
• 50:27
  Speaker 3: What do you think OP should do?
• 50:28
  Speaker 6: I mean, you guys have the tools here, but... It's
• 50:32
  Speaker 6: only if you can use the tools correctly.
• 50:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 50:34
  Speaker 6: You know, it's like, oh, I have a hammer and
• 50:35
  Speaker 6: a nail. But if you're putting the hammer on the
• 50:37
  Speaker 6: thing and the nail at the hammer, not going to work.
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: No, you're just breaking your hammer.
• 50:41
  Speaker 8: Yeah. It really feels like both of them are just very,
• 50:45
  Speaker 8: I don't want to say inept, but very clueless maybe
• 50:49
  Speaker 8: when it comes to how to save and how to,
• 50:53
  Speaker 8: you know, budget. So maybe going to a financial class
• 50:57
  Speaker 8: or something like that.
• 50:59
  Speaker 6: Yeah, maybe like a limit on spending. You can do that.
• 51:03
  Speaker 8: Because even if she gets a job, that doesn't mean
• 51:06
  Speaker 8: that you guys will just suddenly learn how to budget.
• 51:08
  Speaker 8: It just means you'll have more money to spend and
• 51:12
  Speaker 8: you're going to keep doing that until you learn how
• 51:14
  Speaker 8: to budget.
• 51:14
  Speaker 6: I want to know what you're spending your money on, OP,
• 51:16
  Speaker 6: because there's no way in heck it's just her.
• 51:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 51:20
  Speaker 6: There's no way. Yes, again, together you guys are getting takeout.
• 51:23
  Speaker 6: She's getting makeup. What else are you spending your money on?
• 51:26
  Speaker 8: I think we might be finding out. Update says we
• 51:29
  Speaker 8: waste money on stuff we don't need.
• 51:31
  Speaker 6: Oh, wow.
• 51:31
  Speaker 4: Shocking. Yes.
• 51:32
  Speaker 6: Stop getting stuff you don't need. That's the other big step.
• 51:35
  Speaker 8: We did see that coming. Way more than she spends
• 51:38
  Speaker 8: on makeup. Like, seriously, we have a problem. We have
• 51:41
  Speaker 8: YNAB and a budget. We actually do go buy it
• 51:44
  Speaker 8: when we use it. But stop using once we screw
• 51:47
  Speaker 8: up and get overwhelmed. And we both committed to not
• 51:49
  Speaker 8: spending any on unnecessary things until we get our bank
• 51:54
  Speaker 8: under control. Because we know this crap is ridiculous. I
• 51:58
  Speaker 8: talked to her and the food was definitely a communication problem.
• 52:01
  Speaker 8: She's been holding things back because of my anxiety and
• 52:04
  Speaker 8: fights we've had before. It was a simple problem for
• 52:07
  Speaker 8: me to solve, but she thought it would exacerbate my anxiety.
• 52:11
  Speaker 8: I didn't make it clear enough to her before how
• 52:13
  Speaker 8: much the meal thing really bugged me. So she had
• 52:15
  Speaker 8: no idea it was way more important to me. We're
• 52:18
  Speaker 8: doing the meal plan right now. First meal being dinner tonight.
• 52:21
  Speaker 8: And that's the end of the story.
• 52:23
  Speaker 6: I don't know. I feel like we've gotten that before.
• 52:26
  Speaker 6: And he's like, we've talked about it. And we worked
• 52:28
  Speaker 6: on it for a couple days. It's going to go back.
• 52:32
  Speaker 3: I think you really should.
• 52:33
  Speaker 8: Because it seems like you guys are like, oh, well,
• 52:36
  Speaker 8: when we're overwhelmed, we just regress. But then when we're
• 52:41
  Speaker 8: not overwhelmed, we're like, oh, okay, we can fix this.
• 52:44
  Speaker 8: So you really should go to a therapist or a
• 52:46
  Speaker 8: financial therapist. To figure out how to not put yourself
• 52:50
  Speaker 8: in a hole when you get overwhelmed.
• 52:53
  Speaker 6: Again, it's the Ouroboros cycle, another cycle of we get money.
• 52:58
  Speaker 6: We don't want to spend money, but then we get anxiety.
• 53:00
  Speaker 6: So when we get anxiety, you know what helps us?
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: With the anxiety?
• 53:04
  Speaker 6: With the anxiety? Spending money. And then you're like, oh,
• 53:07
  Speaker 6: that helped, and then we feel better now. And then wait,
• 53:10
  Speaker 6: now we have anxiety again.
• 53:11
  Speaker 8: It's just a cycle. But that's the end of that story,
• 53:14
  Speaker 8: and we've got another one coming right up.
• 53:17
  Speaker 6: My husband refused to ask his family for help after
• 53:19
  Speaker 6: our daughter got in the ER?
• 53:21
  Speaker 3: That's the time when you ask.
• 53:23
  Speaker 6: We have a trigger warning for this story. Detailed mention
• 53:25
  Speaker 6: of a dog attack and pretty graphic injury. So if
• 53:30
  Speaker 6: you don't want that, skip this story. This weekend, my
• 53:33
  Speaker 6: 34-female daughter, Ava, 13-female, wanted to go over to her grandparents'
• 53:38
  Speaker 6: house to spend some time with them. My sister-in-law, 30-female,
• 53:42
  Speaker 6: was also visiting the grandparents' house, and she had her
• 53:44
  Speaker 6: hunting dog with her, named Ella. Everything was going A-OK.
• 53:48
  Speaker 6: My husband, 35 male, and I were out enjoying a
• 53:50
  Speaker 6: date night when we got a message from Ava that
• 53:53
  Speaker 6: Ella tried to lunge at her, but then grandma got
• 53:56
  Speaker 6: between them. Then we get an update two minutes later
• 53:59
  Speaker 6: that the dog had bit Ava and she was bleeding.
• 54:05
  Speaker 6: So we rushed to go pick up Ava. There was
• 54:07
  Speaker 6: a lot going on at the grandparents' house that day.
• 54:11
  Speaker 6: My husband started freaking out and yelling on the way there,
• 54:13
  Speaker 6: so I told him we should be more empathetic, because
• 54:16
  Speaker 6: the grandparents did not want this to happen either, and
• 54:19
  Speaker 6: they are having a hard time too. The Cistern Law's
• 54:21
  Speaker 6: dogs have a history of behavioral health problems. I actually
• 54:25
  Speaker 6: was bitten by their other dog, who was unprovoked, two
• 54:29
  Speaker 6: years ago as well. However, I chalked it up to
• 54:31
  Speaker 6: me not being smart in approaching their dog. and the
• 54:35
  Speaker 6: dog didn't break my skin. I'm a little more than
• 54:37
  Speaker 6: frustrated that if they knew the dog had issues, that
• 54:40
  Speaker 6: it was allowed to roam the house. This dog has
• 54:43
  Speaker 6: barked at Ava before, and it also bit the grandparent
• 54:46
  Speaker 6: in the face last night, but did not break skin.
• 54:49
  Speaker 6: By the way, this comes from user BagelsForeverX, and if
• 54:52
  Speaker 6: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 54:54
  Speaker 6: r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Kion.
• 54:57
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 54:57
  Speaker 6: And both of us are going to give advice, uh...
• 55:00
  Speaker 6: I think everyone's in agreeance here. What are we doing?
• 55:03
  Speaker 3: What are we doing?
• 55:05
  Speaker 6: Let us know what you do in the comments down below.
• 55:07
  Speaker 6: Like yell a little bit.
• 55:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 55:09
  Speaker 6: As OP says. So we get Ava and we go home.
• 55:13
  Speaker 6: The dog bite was on the back of the knee
• 55:16
  Speaker 6: and the dog did puncture skin in one spot. The
• 55:20
  Speaker 6: puncture was pretty deep. And after an hour, it was
• 55:22
  Speaker 6: still bleeding. I called the nurse line through my insurance
• 55:25
  Speaker 6: and the nurse assessed us and recommended we go into
• 55:28
  Speaker 6: the ER within the hour.
• 55:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 55:31
  Speaker 6: The ER did a CAT scan because the bite was
• 55:34
  Speaker 6: right on a joint. The ER decided not to stitch
• 55:38
  Speaker 6: the wound, but they cleaned it and gave us antibiotics.
• 55:41
  Speaker 6: Ava is okay. She had a lot of adrenaline, but
• 55:45
  Speaker 6: she's resting at home in her room, and she is sore,
• 55:49
  Speaker 6: which makes sense. The following day, I started talking to
• 55:51
  Speaker 6: my husband about how much this is going to cost
• 55:54
  Speaker 6: us and how we should talk to the brother-in-law and
• 55:56
  Speaker 6: sister-in-law when he gets back in town. Or talk to
• 55:59
  Speaker 6: his parents about homeowner's insurance to see if they can help.
• 56:03
  Speaker 6: My husband doesn't want to ask for any financial help.
• 56:05
  Speaker 6: Stating that his parents wouldn't ask us if it was reversed.
• 56:09
  Speaker 6: And that his sister does not work so they don't
• 56:12
  Speaker 6: have money. I counter that his sister and brother-in-law just
• 56:14
  Speaker 6: decided to buy a house worth double the value of
• 56:18
  Speaker 6: their previous home this year. That their home was just
• 56:21
  Speaker 6: fine and they just upgraded. And that we could probably
• 56:24
  Speaker 6: work out something together. He told me I have always
• 56:27
  Speaker 6: hated his family and that I'm coming after them. I
• 56:30
  Speaker 6: told him that's not true. For example, I talk to
• 56:33
  Speaker 6: his mom more than he does. And I was the
• 56:36
  Speaker 6: one who calmed him down before we got to their house.
• 56:39
  Speaker 6: I was the one who sat with his family and
• 56:41
  Speaker 6: calmed them down and gave everyone hugs. And I told
• 56:43
  Speaker 6: everyone it was okay and that accidents do happen. We
• 56:47
  Speaker 6: have had major difficulties with his family in the past.
• 56:50
  Speaker 6: but we have all grown and I really do try
• 56:53
  Speaker 6: to do my best. Also, I would like to say
• 56:56
  Speaker 6: that we do have a difficult relationship with the sister.
• 56:59
  Speaker 6: The dynamic between the sister and her parents is very
• 57:03
  Speaker 6: weird because she has health issues and she is prioritized
• 57:07
  Speaker 6: a lot. It has happened multiple times where the sister
• 57:09
  Speaker 6: is chosen over us. And this makes asking for this
• 57:13
  Speaker 6: even harder as I know what is going to happen. Also,
• 57:17
  Speaker 6: The grandparents have rented a condo at the beach a
• 57:19
  Speaker 6: few months out, out of their own pocket, for a
• 57:21
  Speaker 6: family vacation for all of us. So it's difficult to
• 57:24
  Speaker 6: want to put a financial burden on someone else. I
• 57:27
  Speaker 6: am not asking for someone to write me a check tomorrow.
• 57:30
  Speaker 6: Ava is safe and at home. And bills aren't due immediately.
• 57:34
  Speaker 6: But I'm asking my husband to consider asking his family
• 57:37
  Speaker 6: for help. Since it was something that happened under their care.
• 57:40
  Speaker 8: And it was something that happened because of their dog.
• 57:44
  Speaker 6: And Opie says this. It happened at their home with
• 57:47
  Speaker 6: their dog.
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 57:49
  Speaker 7: Agreed.
• 57:49
  Speaker 6: Yeah. They're liable.
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: They're full.
• 57:52
  Speaker 8: You could sue them. You literally could sue them.
• 57:54
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 57:55
  Speaker 6: Like, I get it. Accidents happen. But just, like.
• 57:58
  Speaker 8: That's like saying like, oh, accidents happen with cars. And
• 58:02
  Speaker 8: so we should just not make the person who was
• 58:05
  Speaker 8: driving and hit, you know, another car liable.
• 58:07
  Speaker 6: Yeah, it's OK. Accidents do happen in our state. The
• 58:11
  Speaker 6: dog owner is liable for the bite. I would hope so.
• 58:14
  Speaker 6: That would make sense. I would like to have the
• 58:16
  Speaker 6: family consider if the homeowner's insurance would help. Or if
• 58:20
  Speaker 6: there is a way where some money can be set
• 58:22
  Speaker 6: aside for payments. I have a high deductible plan. I
• 58:25
  Speaker 6: have been sued for by my medical debt twice by
• 58:29
  Speaker 6: this hospital for unpaid bills, and I don't want to
• 58:31
  Speaker 6: do it again. It is a big financial burden for us,
• 58:34
  Speaker 6: but we wanted to make sure Ava was okay. I
• 58:37
  Speaker 6: don't feel like we should have to front the bill.
• 58:39
  Speaker 4: Am I the a-hole?
• 58:41
  Speaker 6: And we have a consensus here and some relevant comments.
• 58:45
  Speaker 6: But Sophia, is Opie the a-hole?
• 58:48
  Speaker 2: No.
• 58:49
  Speaker 8: And you could sue them. And I would talk to
• 58:51
  Speaker 8: your husband and say, hey, we could sue them. Like,
• 58:53
  Speaker 8: this is a suable offense. Do you not understand that? Like,
• 58:57
  Speaker 8: they should pay.
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:59
  Speaker 6: And I would go up to her and be like,
• 59:00
  Speaker 6: do you want another medical burden or another bill that's
• 59:03
  Speaker 6: going to be burdening us? Because this affects your daughter
• 59:06
  Speaker 6: as well. But your husband's too.
• 59:10
  Speaker 4: Stubborn. Stubborn.
• 59:12
  Speaker 6: Not pompous is the word, but he's just too high
• 59:15
  Speaker 6: and mighty to be like... He's like, I don't want their.
• 59:18
  Speaker 8: I feel like he's viewing it from, oh, well, I
• 59:21
  Speaker 8: don't want their charity. I don't want to ask them
• 59:23
  Speaker 8: for help.
• 59:23
  Speaker 6: I don't need their money.
• 59:24
  Speaker 3: And it's like, no, no, no. They owe you money.
• 59:27
  Speaker 6: They're the reason we're in this... Yes. fiasco in the
• 59:30
  Speaker 6: first place. So we do have a consensus on OP
• 59:34
  Speaker 6: and some relevant comments here. The consensus is that OP
• 59:38
  Speaker 6: is not the a-hole, but also the a-hole for letting
• 59:41
  Speaker 6: her daughter go to her grandparents' house knowing there was
• 59:44
  Speaker 6: a dog present at the time. Relevant comments here. Commenters saying,
• 59:48
  Speaker 6: Ava said she feels it was her fault? What happened
• 59:51
  Speaker 6: prior to the dog lunging at her? Was the dog napping?
• 59:54
  Speaker 6: Did she step on the tail when trying to pass
• 59:56
  Speaker 6: the dog? OP says, no. She just feels guilty. It
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 6: was unprovoked. We had the same story from everyone involved.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 6: Ava was cutting apples. The dog howled at her. They
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 6: thought the dog needed to go potty. So the sister-in-law
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 6: took the dog out. The dog came back in and
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 6: went up to Ava. Ava jumped back a little bit
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 6: because she was scared and the dog lunged for her.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 6: Commenter here says, you are not wrong for wanting help
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 6: with the bill, but it should be the sister-in-law that
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 6: you ask for help. It's her dog, and the grandparents'
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 6: homeowner's insurance shouldn't have to be used. It will increase
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 6: their homeowner's insurance, though. Opie says, that makes sense to me.
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 6: The in-laws always help out the sister-in-law because they're always
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 6: talking about how they don't have money. Again, I don't
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 6: know how their finances are, but they did just buy
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 6: a new house. I would like my husband to call
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 6: the brother-in-law when he gets back into town. He's the
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 6: one who manages the finances and works. Also, he's the
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 6: level-headed one, so I think it'll be an easier approach.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 6: I don't want their insurance to go up either. I
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 6: was just thinking maybe it wouldn't be as much of
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 6: a burden to the sister-in-law if the insurance covered it.
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 6: I also highly expect the grandparents to try and pay
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 6: for the sister-in-law if they knew we were asking for
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 6: their money, which I don't want them to have to
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 6: do that. Commodore here says, Everyone sucks here. You literally
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 6: left your child in a home where dogs roam freely,
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 6: and you have been bitten. So this is a known issue.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 3: This is crazy.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 8: This is crazy to be like, you left your child
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 8: in a home where there are dogs. You deserve to
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 8: be bitten.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 3: What? I have a dog at home.
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 8: If my dog or my parents have a dog, if
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 8: my dog bit someone else, I wouldn't be like, well,
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 8: you knew what could have happened. You walked into my
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 8: house with a dog in it.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 6: I mean, I would have been like, can we keep
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 6: the dog separate? Like, can we just keep the dog
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 6: outside for just a little bit of time?
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 8: If they knew, if they knew, but OP earlier said
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 8: that they didn't know that it had behavioral issues.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 6: But I don't know.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 3: But the grandparents did.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 6: The grandparents did.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: The grandparents got bit the night before.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 6: Sister-in-law has a history with these dogs or their dogs
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 6: being very aggressive.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 4: Exactly. Exactly.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 3: They all knew.
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 8: So even more so, they should be paying for this.
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 8: OP didn't know.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 3: It's just a dog.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 6: This commenter continues saying the greater a-hole are the owners
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 6: of the dogs that attack humans. You report the bite
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 6: to the authorities. You can sue them for compensation and
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 6: move on with your life. Their dog hurts someone. It's
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 6: their responsibility for paying the damages.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 6: Obi responds to that comment saying, it's fair to say
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 6: that and it's okay to judge. However, we did not
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 6: know the dog would roam free. When the dog is
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 6: at the in-laws, it's typically outside on a leash or
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 6: in a cage. Again, my mom's senses were tingling, but
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 6: it was an accident all around. No one wanted it
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 6: to happen. Their other dog who bit me passed away
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 6: of their health issues. This was a communication issue on
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 6: my part. So I can see your point. I should
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 6: have confirmed the dog would be put up. I just
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 6: assumed the best and didn't expect the worst. They are
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 6: still family and I trusted them. And we have an update.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 8: I think that's super fair. I think it's super fair.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 8: And now he's never going to make that mistake again.
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: Truly.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 6: But I agree. Don't go for the your grandparents for
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 6: the homeowner's insurance. Go for the sister-in-law.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 6: I mean, raise the dog. It's their dog.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 3: Just ask.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I think it's a simple ask of like, hey,
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 6: can you help out? Because it was your dog who
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 6: bit Ava.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 6: Here's an update. A lot of you said to validate
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 6: that the dog was vaccinated for rabies. I'm so thankful
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 6: for everyone's seriousness because it wasn't vaccinated.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 8: And so now you got to go take your daughter
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 8: to get a freaking rabies shot.
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 6: And how is this not brought up immediately? Immediately. How
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 6: is this not brought up?
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 8: It's like OP expects a certain amount of trust and trust. uh,
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 8: honesty because they are family. And I get that. I'm like, yeah,
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 8: of course you would trust them.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 6: Even if it is family. I'm just like making sure like, Hey, this, this, this, this,
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 6: but like, but Opie didn't do it until the commanders
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 6: told her to validate the dog. Yeah. I wouldn't think
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 6: about that.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 4: That's crazy.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 8: I would not think about that would not be my
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 8: first thought. Um, and I would also think that the
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 8: doctors would be like, Oh, you should get that checked out,
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 8: which it's crazy that they went to the ER and
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 8: weren't like, Hey, did this dog have its rabies shots?
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 8: Because if I'm a mom and I'm scared, I don't know.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 8: I just understand the fear. My mom got attacked by
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 8: a dog when I was with her. And it's very chaotic.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 8: And I took her to the ER and stuff. And
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 8: so you kind of expect that the doctors are going
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 8: to be like, do this, do this. Because you have
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 8: so much going on in your mind.
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 3: I think this is all on the family, the owners
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 3: of the dog.
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 6: Today, I called the sheriff and reported the bite. So
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 6: we can take the next steps to make sure the
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 6: dog is quarantined and manage appropriately. I told the family,
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 6: so they are now aware. I'm following up with Ava's
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 6: primary care tomorrow to see what the medical opinion is
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 6: on whether we should go ahead and get the rabies shot.
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 6: Their office is closed now, or else I'd call now.
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 6: My husband went over to their house today and confirmed
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 6: the sister will pay our bills. This was covered without
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 6: any hesitation.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 4: Good.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 6: I'm still not okay with my husband's response. We slept
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 6: apart last night and we have therapy this week, which
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 6: we will use to find a way to heal. Lastly,
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 6: and sadly, the family has canceled the vacation, which we
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 6: figured would be the response. Thank you again for really
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 6: pushing for the confirmation on vaccines.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah, smart.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 6: We are taking every step to make sure that dog
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 6: is quarantined and our daughter's safety is top priority. We
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 6: have more relevant comments here. Well, we found out a
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 6: bad thing, but now... Jumping from the bad thing of
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 6: the rabies is a good thing that sister-in-law will pay
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 6: for everything.
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 3: Yes, but she should. Absolutely.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 6: Could you imagine not paying for any of this? It's
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 6: not my fault. It's the dog's fault.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 6: Relevant comments. And Opie responds to multiple comments on waiting
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 6: to ask her daughter's doctor about the rabies shots instead
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 6: of getting them immediately. Like I said, Opie was advised
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 6: to ignore the medical advice and take Ava to the
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 6: ER for rabies shots. Opie says, hi, I'm not sure
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 6: I understand what you mean about vaccinating my child to
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 6: begin with. It's not a preventative shot that's offered here.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you can't get preventative shots.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 4: What?
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 6: We did not know the dog was unvaccinated until tonight,
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 6: and I followed up with a nurse, with medical advice,
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 6: and with the sheriff.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: I don't think OP is doing anything wrong here. I
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 3: think OP is doing everything right.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 6: I'm following exactly what the medical professionals are telling me
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 6: to do. I absolutely promise I don't want my daughter
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 6: to pass away of rabies, and I'm doing everything in
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 6: my power to protect her.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 8: Also, again, rabies, like, OP's got time. Rabies doesn't become
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 8: a problem right away. It just stays dormant. You just
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 8: do have to get a shot before at least a
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 8: couple weeks, but it's not immediate.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 6: It's not like a zombie bite.
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 3: No, it's very treatable.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 6: If it's just one day or a couple days, it
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 6: should be fine, but I would be like, let's get
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 6: this on top of our priority list.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 8: I think it's very normal for OB to be like, hey, doctor.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 6: What do you think? And Opie continues saying, yep, exactly.
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 6: The dog is quarantined. There is a reason dog to
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 6: human rabies transmission is low in the US. It's because
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 6: our system works and I'm following the system and every
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 6: single piece of professional advice that I've gotten in the
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 6: last 24 hours. I am doing everything I can. And
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 6: that's good to know. Thank you for sharing. I'm following
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 6: up again with her primary tomorrow and we have an
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 6: appointment Thursday. So I will get medical advice on next
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 6: steps on what to do. I'm following the instructions I've
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 6: been given, but I will see if I can get
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 6: a hold of a pediatrician or someone with medical advice.
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 6: I just called the nurse line for her pediatrician, and
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 6: I'm following protocol from an animal control and the nurse.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 6: Another commentary says, what the heck? No rabies vaccine? How
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 6: irresponsible are the owners of the dog?
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 3: So irresponsible. We are learning so irresponsible. They should not
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 3: own dogs.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 6: Opie says, I agree. I was so angry I hung
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 6: up on my husband when he told me. And we
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 6: have an update two, three days later. Your daughter has
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 6: rabies now.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 3: I'm going to.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 4: Just kidding.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 6: I'm kidding.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 8: I looked it up because I was interested. So I asked,
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 8: if you get bit by a dog without rabies, without
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 8: a rabies shot, should you always get the rabies shot?
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 3: And it says not always.
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 8: If the dog is healthy and can be watched for
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 8: 10 days, which is what the quarantine is for, you
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 8: might not need.
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 3: The shots right away.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 8: If the dog stays healthy, it does not have rabies
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 8: when it bit you, meaning you don't need the vaccine. However,
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 8: if it shows signs of rabies, then you should get it.
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 4: So.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 8: We don't know that this dog has rabies. It's being
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 8: quarantined to find out. So the doctors might have advised her, like,
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 8: you might not need it.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 6: We play the waiting game. Have your daughter bite.
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 5: The dog back.
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and then we'll see who has rabies.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 6: Update two, three days later.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 4: Hi, all.
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 6: I thought that things may finally calm down and go
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 6: back to normal for our little family. Boy, was I wrong.
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 6: Ava had a follow-up appointment today with her pediatrician. And
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 6: the pediatrician stated that as long as the dog is quarantined,
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 6: Ava doesn't need to go get the vaccine. The hard
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 6: part has been getting status updates about the dog.
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 8: Yeah, so they're like, we don't even know if this
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 8: dog is still okay yeah i well sometimes they just
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 8: put the dog down and then you're like well i
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 8: don't well now we'll never know yeah it's like no
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 8: this is.
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 6: So dumb the sheriff's department has been unhelpful and unable
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 6: to provide any status update on our case we have
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 6: called at least five times and received zero update i've
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 6: reached out to the county health department And they are
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 6: now escalating and helping us investigate the dog's status.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 4: Good.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 6: So now we can monitor it. Unfortunately, because we couldn't
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 6: find out the status of the dog, we did reach
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 6: out to my mother-in-law as a third party to see
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 6: if they had any information to provide to us. And
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 6: that conversation did not go well. The mother-in-law first asked
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 6: us if we were recording.
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 8: This is so stupid. It's like, hey, hey, focus. Your
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 8: granddaughter might have rabies.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 6: Honey, are you recording right now? If you're recording, I
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 6: can't tell you the truths.
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah, come on.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 6: Multiple times they have implied that we are going to
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 6: sue them.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 4: You should.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 6: I mean, if you keep going like this, I will.
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 6: She also stated that she would not have called animal control.
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 6: She was being very defensive about giving status updates on
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 6: the dog. We finally found out the dog is quarantining
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 6: at home and the sister-in-law has to send pictures to
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 6: the sheriff every day of the dog or else it
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 6: will get taken. I don't trust this. The sheriff's office
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 6: didn't even call us back and no one had any
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 6: notes in our case. With that being said, I'm going
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 6: to talk to my husband about going ahead and getting
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 6: the vaccine for our daughter.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah. At this point, that makes sense because you don't know.
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 6: It's just like, why am I playing a guessing game
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 6: if no one's giving me information that should be very
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 6: pertinent to this case?
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 3: Would you cut off the family at this point?
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 6: For how stupid they're handling this?
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 8: Yeah. Well, stupid and also dangerously. Like, they don't even
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 8: care that their granddaughter slash niece... It might be in danger.
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 6: The last of your worries is me suing you. It's
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 6: about my daughter, aka your granddaughter.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 8: Who was in your care.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 6: I would cut off. I would probably go very low
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 6: contact after this. Yeah. After the bills are paid.
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 8: After we get paid or maybe we just go sue them.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 6: Get your money. Go low contact. Very easy. Your in-laws suck.
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 3: They suck.
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 8: They suck. Like again, I never had, and maybe I'm,
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 8: viewing this story from the perspective of like, I've always
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 8: had very good relationships with all dogs in my life.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 8: Like I've never had a bad experience. Um, so I
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 8: just fully see this as the owner's problem, the owner's, um, mistake. And, uh, yeah, they,
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 8: they should pay. They should be sued.
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 3: If you need to. I would cut them off.
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 6: See, this is where I come in. I've had very
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 6: bad experience with dogs because I can tell. I had, well,
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 6: cause I, For me, I would feel like I was
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 6: going to pass away because I had asthma and I
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 6: was allergic to dogs. Oh, you were allergic. So breathing
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 6: was impossible.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 6: And the family members who are like, whenever we'd go
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 6: visit family with dogs or anyone with dogs, you could
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 6: tell like who cares and who doesn't care.
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 6: Like, oh, he's fine.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 6: Until I'm not fine and I start literally breathing, like
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 6: trying to breathe through a straw.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 6: I had to go to the ER a bunch of
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 6: times growing up. It was very traumatic.
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 6: Because... It wasn't cool.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 8: But you've never been bit, like, seriously by this dog?
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 6: Not necessarily, but I always kept my distance from dogs.
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 4: Because you were allergic.
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 6: Because I was allergic. But, like, it was also, like,
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 6: a safety thing because I didn't want to get licked.
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 6: I didn't want to get bitten. I didn't want to
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 6: get scratched.
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 4: Any of that.
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 6: Because I was so afraid of going back to the ER. Because, one,
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 6: it cost a lot of money. I mean, we had
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 6: health insurance. But it was just, like, bills are expensive.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 4: And, two.
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 6: You think I like the feeling of not breathing?
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 8: So I think that makes sense where you're coming from
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 8: of like, be very cautious. I've been raised, your mom
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 8: had experience. So you've been raised to be very cautious.
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 8: I think I'm kind of on the other side of like,
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 8: I have always been very, you know, be careful around
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 8: dogs because they're an animal. But I've always been very
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 8: comfortable around dogs. So I would be probably similar to
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 8: OP where I'm just like, yeah, unless I've heard about
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 8: this dog biting someone before, and it's a family member's dog,
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 8: I would assume... that they are going to take care
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 8: and control their dog. And then when they don't do that,
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 8: you're like.
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 3: What the heck? Why do you even have a dog?
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 6: Yeah, it's been happening. There's a history of it. If
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 6: it's happened twice now.
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like, I'm not, you're not allowed anywhere near
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 3: my daughter.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 6: Or more than that. Yeah, you're not seeing us for
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 6: a while.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 6: Let's go ahead and finish this up. On top of that,
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 6: we learned that the vacation was canceled because the in-laws
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 6: didn't know how the brother-in-law will feel. I told them
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 6: we already bought our plane tickets, so we're going no
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 6: matter what. If they show up, Great. If not, they
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 6: can stay at home and pay our medical bills and
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 6: watch us have a vacation. Please note, I'm not implying
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 6: that the vacation was the most important thing. I just
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 6: want to add context on how the parents seem to
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 6: care more about their daughter's feelings than the health of
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 6: their granddaughter.
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 8: Yeah, they don't care about, they've made it very clear
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 8: that they do not care about Ava's health.
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 6: They went, are you recording this?
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, are you recording?
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 8: No, we're not going to tell you about the dog
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 8: that might have rabies.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 6: Obi continued saying, I'm going low or no contact with
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 6: this family. Our entire family has been traumatized. I have
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 6: lost sleep. I can't concentrate at work or on any
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 6: of my college work, and I spent my days in
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 6: tears over this. When my husband comes home, I'm going
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 6: to see about taking Ava back to the ER to
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 6: get the vaccination shot for rabies. We can't even get
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 6: information from them, so we can't trust it. They can
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 6: pay another $ 3, 000 of bills while we enjoy our little
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 6: family vacation without them for Ava's birthday in September. And
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 6: that's the end of that story.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 3: So true.
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 8: You get to be like, hey, if you don't tell
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 8: us if your dog has freaking rabies, then enjoy another
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 8: bill for the rabies shot we had to get.
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 6: We're not going to sue you, but you're still paying
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 6: the bills. Yeah. I would get it in writing.
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Get it in writing. Don't, don't.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 6: Be just like, oh, we take their word for it.
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 3: I assume there's some sort of legal process going on
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 3: right now.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 6: There has to be, but come on. With them can't even-
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 6: Because they filed a report. They can't even give you
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 6: the information about the dog?
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's ridiculous.
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 6: That is the end of that story. And we have
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 6: another one coming right up.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: Hey, it's Carly, Keon's girlfriend, here.
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 2: We're going to get back to the stories, but here's
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 2: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 8: My husband implied our son isn't his because the boy.
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 3: Grew taller than him.
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 6: Your husband's an idiot.
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 8: My husband and I have a 17-year-old son, Jake. Jake
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 8: is about 6'4. My husband is around 5'10, and I'm 5'10,
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 8: as well. My husband's family are all average height, while
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 8: my family is a lot taller. I'm actually the shortest
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 8: of three sisters and a brother. But like most sane people,
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 8: I don't care about height. I assume my husband didn't either,
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 8: seeing that he married me and would defend me every
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 8: time one of his buddies tried making a rude joke.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 6: How are they making you rude? The fact that you're
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 6: just tall?
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah, probably like, oh, your wife's tall.
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 6: How's the weather up there?
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 8: But ever since our son surpassed our height when he
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 8: was 15, my husband has been making a few very
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 8: off comments. Basically just things like, he's too tall.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 3: Is he even mine?
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 8: And then you go, well, well, yes, because that's how
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 8: genetics works sometimes.
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 6: You go, are you stupid?
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 3: Are you dumb?
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 8: You know, comments that make it seem like I cheated
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 8: on him. Jake also has more of my features, so yeah.
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 8: I never thought much about his comments because he still
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 8: treated our son like our other kids and would only
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 8: say it once every year or so. Also, my mom
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 8: has a terminal illness, so I was a bit distracted.
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 6: Wait, he says it once a year? Or so.
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 8: Yeah, every birthday of their sons, he's like, I don't know,
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 8: he's getting taller.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 6: Happy birthday, maybe my son.
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 3: He's getting a little taller. I don't know.
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 8: By the way, this comes from throwaway46539, and if you
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 8: want to submit your own stories, go to the r
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 8: slash okay story time subreddit.
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 6: I'm Keon.
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give.
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 8: Good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers,
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 8: so if you've got answers... Put them down below.
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 6: Let us know how tall you are.
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 3: Let us know how tall you are in the comments
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 3: down below.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 6: I want three things. I want three things. Your parents' height, well,
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 6: your mother's height, your father's height, and then your height.
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 3: I'm shorter than all of my family.
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 6: I'm the tallest one in my family.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 4: Oh, wow.
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 3: Sam's the tallest one in ours.
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 8: Anyway, my husband and I were picking my brother up
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 8: from the hospital, and I don't know why, but my
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 8: husband thought it would be a great idea to start
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 8: complaining about our son. He said the usual, he's nothing
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 8: like me. He's not smart. He's too tall. He likes
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 8: the sports I dislike. That Asta means something, right?
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 3: Damn, why are you just roasting your son?
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 6: Going back to it again, your husband is really dumb.
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 8: Wait, I was honestly so over it and asked him
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 8: if he was an idiot.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 3: That's what you said.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 6: I'm on the same way.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 3: Is he an idiot?
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 6: If my partner asked me or told me this, he
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 6: doesn't like what I like. He's taller than me.
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 3: Kiana gets worse.
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 4: Oh, good.
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 6: I'm already crashing out.
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 3: He's a biology teacher, for goodness sake.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 6: Take that away from him.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 3: Take it away.
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 6: What is he teaching? Take that away from him.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I'm going into his class. I'm saying, hey, students,
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 8: can you teach your biology teacher how to freaking use
• 1:18:05
  Speaker 8: a Punnett square?
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 6: I guarantee you he'd did what i did asking the
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 6: commenters like everyone in the class where i need to
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 6: test a hypothesis yeah if my son is.
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 3: Really tall does that mean he's my son.
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 6: Hypothetically or okay everyone here i need your mother's height
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 6: your father's height and then your height and then if
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 6: any of you are taller than them i need dna.
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 8: Test op continues does he not know how genetics work
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 8: apparently not I said all that and told him that
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 8: if he was so concerned that he can get a
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 8: paternity test, but that I'm done with him. My brother
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 8: heard all of this and told my husband to quit
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 8: acting like a knucklehead. And that was it until we
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 8: dropped my brother off. Then he started yelling at me,
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 8: saying I didn't have to say all of that in
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 8: front of my brother and that I am him. And
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 8: then you turn to him and say, you implied that
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 8: I cheated on you in front of him.
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 6: What's more embarrassing is that he heard you say that
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 6: stuff to me because your son's taller than you.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, come on.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 6: And has different interests than you. Yeah.
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 8: He said that he already doesn't like being around my
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 8: brother because he's 6'6.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 5: It's a height thing. It's a height thing.
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 3: Also, yes.
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 1: Hmm.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 8: I wonder where your son could have got his height
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 8: gene from.
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 6: Your husband's 5'10. And he's acting like such a little man.
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 8: He's acting like a little baby man, little one-inch man.
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 8: And then I just made him feel worse. I called
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 8: him crazy for being intimidated by and jealous of my brother.
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 3: And his son.
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 8: And also said he did this to himself and he
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 8: needs to stop talking about our son like that. He
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 8: just said that he's venting to me, his wife, and
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 8: that it's not like he's doing anything to our son.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 8: He claims I'm overreacting and being a drama queen.
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 6: I'm breaking up with you for one, how stupid you are,
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 6: but also how immature you are, too.
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 8: Yeah, you could have, you know, a paternity test, but
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 8: you can also have some divorce papers. I just said,
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 8: says you, but he insists I'm the a-hole, and after
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 8: dropping me home, he left and still hasn't come back.
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 6: Good riddance.
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 8: My mother said that he's being crazy, but that I
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 8: didn't have to say anything in front of my brother,
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 8: and that I did overdo it a bit. My sister
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 8: agrees as well, and they think I should apologize for that.
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 3: Am I the a-hole?
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 8: And we do have an update.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 3: What do you think? Should OP apologize?
• 1:20:26
  Speaker 6: Why would I apologize to someone with such idiotic questions? No.
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 8: Yeah, no.
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 3: Absolutely not.
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 8: I would go to him and say, hey, what's the
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 8: real reason? Are you actually accusing me of cheating or
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 8: are you just insecure?
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 4: Or both. Or both.
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 6: And let's be real. It's both.
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 3: It's both. Update.
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 8: I was honestly just in a really bad mood for
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 8: a long time after I made the post. My husband
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 8: still wasn't messaging me back. and my kids were starting
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 8: to notice that something was off. I ended up telling
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 8: them that their dad had an emergency, but they didn't
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 8: really buy it.
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 3: Teenagers!
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 8: Anyway, I texted my husband one last time, saying that
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 8: if he didn't answer by the morning, then I'm done.
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 8: I'm exhausted and refuse to deal with his nonsense anymore.
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 8: I told him that he can expect divorce papers soon
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 8: if he plans on ignoring me. Guess who replied in
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 8: the morning? He asked me if I was being serious.
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 8: And I said that I was. I also told him
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 8: that he can do a paternity test, but that he
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 8: can tell our son why. Honestly, good on you, OP.
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 8: Throw that all in his face.
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 6: Yeah, sure, you embarrassed him in front of your brother,
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 6: but it's embarrassing to get that from your partner of
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 6: asking you every year. I also, I'm pretty sure your
• 1:21:44
  Speaker 6: son's catching on eventually.
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 8: He probably gets that his dad doesn't like him. Thinks
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 8: he's stupid. thinks that he is disappointed that they don't
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 8: have the same interests.
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 6: That's on you.
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 3: What?
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 8: He started crying after calling me a drama queen. Said
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 8: that he's just insecure because his friends put ideas in
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 8: his head.
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 3: I don't freaking care.
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 6: I don't, even worse.
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry, your friends who have always made fun of
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 3: my height? Get rid of them.
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 6: Also, you're calling me a drama queen and then crying immediately?
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 4: Is insane.
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 8: When I asked him why he has more faith in
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 8: them than me, he didn't answer. I told them to
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 8: get some therapy because I can't and refuse to be
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 8: with someone who is jealous of their own child. I
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 8: told them to imagine how our son would feel if
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 8: he knew just how much he resents him. My husband interrupted,
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 8: saying that he doesn't hate him. And I told them
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 8: to prove it then. Hate and resent, different. And he
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 8: didn't say no to resent. He was quiet for a while,
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 8: but said he'd see a therapist. This was such a relief,
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 8: I almost cried. We both agreed that he'd stay with
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 8: his sister where he's been this whole time until.
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 3: His first session.
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 8: I told their children that their father isn't mentally well
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 8: right now, but that they can visit him anytime. Our
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 8: son was very worried and called them immediately. My husband
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 8: called me later saying he feels so guilty, especially after
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 8: their phone call, and I just said, good! Honestly, I
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 8: still don't know how this will end. I want to
• 1:23:12
  Speaker 8: believe in my husband, but I'm finding it so hard.
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 6: I don't know how you wouldn't just get the immediate ick.
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'd be like, eh.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 4: You think?
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 3: You think I cheated on you?
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 6: You think I cheated on you because our son is
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 6: taller than us?
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 8: Yeah, ick because you don't trust me and ick because
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 8: you're dumb.
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 4: Double the ick.
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 8: My son does feel like his dad and him aren't
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 8: very close, but he isn't aware of any of my
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 8: husband's thoughts. And I hope he never becomes aware.
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 6: You have kids. You guys have been a family unit
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 6: for a while, but yeah. This is just so dumb.
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's so.
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 8: Like, clearly, I'm glad he's getting therapy because this is just.
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 3: Something is not right in his brain.
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 6: No, but, like, one, I would tell him to cut
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 6: off or, like, go very low contact with his friends.
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah. They're not good influences.
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 6: Because, one, your husband's dumb enough to believe them.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 6: They also are really dumb, too.
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 8: Dumb enough to say that stuff. There's a bit more...
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 8: On another note, my brother called me saying he talked
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 8: to my husband a few days ago and said that
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 8: he gave my husband a real reason to be scared.
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 3: And intimidated by him.
• 1:24:23
  Speaker 8: My sister also came to her senses after my brother
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 8: made fun of her. Gotta love older brothers, right? My
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 8: mom still thinks I should apologize for the kid's sake.
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 8: I mean, so long as she isn't butting in, she's
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 8: entitled to her own opinion. And that's the end of
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 8: the story, folks.
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 4: Nah.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 6: I have no reason to apologize.
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 2: Nah.
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 6: Why am I apologizing for saying the truth?
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 5: He dumb. He dumb.
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 3: He can figure it out and maybe go back to school.
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 6: Mom, he thought I cheated on him because our son
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 6: is taller than him and they don't have the same interest.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 4: No.
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 8: No.
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 3: That's the end of the story, though, and the end
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 3: of the episode.