Latest / Faith, Family, and Lesson Plans / Episode 3: Patience When the Classroom or the House Is Wild
Transcript
- Mariel E2: this is the main point of this whole podcast. If you can remember anything of any episode, just remember this one thing grace over perfection. Every time, friend, Welcome, welcome, welcome to Faith Family and Lesson Plan. This is episode three. I can't believe we made it here. I am so glad you're here. I am Mario Pok, I'm your host for Faith Family and Lesson Plan. This is a podcast that was born out of what I needed 11 years ago. I keep telling that to myself. I think I created this. Podcast for the me version 11 years ago when I started teaching high school. And I thought that I had to get it to have everything figured out. and I would have loved if somebody were to tell me everything that I am going to share with you here. Our target today is to talk about patience. Patience when the classroom is wild when the house is wild And what about when both of them are wild We need that. And little did I know that as I was getting ready for this episode, the Lord really gave me some lessons and patience this week. This week I struggle. I struggle this week in the classroom. I struggle a little bit in my house. But how else do we learn if we don't take a test? Or or how do we show that we have learned something if we don't take a test? For as teachers, we know we teach, we teach, we teach, we teach. There gets a moment it gets a moment that we have to give our kiddos a test, and they show us what they have learned. Isn't that how it works? Well, I guess that's how it works for our father too. We learn, we learn, we learn. And he gotta give us a test so we can show what we have learned. So that's what we're gonna talk about today. Patience when the classroom is wild, patient when our house is wild, and even more patient when both of them are going crazy. We're gonna be in Galatians 5, verse 22 and 23. Today we're gonna be talking about a little bit about the fruits of the spirit. I did an extended Bible study on the fruits of the spirit a few years ago, and I learned a lot about it. But it's something that you keep applying every single day as you go. It's not something that you're gonna learn, that you're gonna study, you're gonna learn and move on. No, it's something you're gonna have to practice every single day. So, this is what we're going to be doing today. This is episode three. As I say, after this episode, I'm actually going to be posting all these episodes. And I'm very glad I made it all the way all the way here. And I am very glad you are here with me. So, this is the idea of this postcast. This podcast is not to give you advice because I am not an expert on the Bible, an expert in the classroom now, wonderful, perfect mom. This is To share with you things that have worked for me. And to share with you things that the Lord had taught me all these years. I did share with my students that I was gonna have a podcast and they asked, what is it about, Miss Bob? What is it about? And I told them, it is because I made this podcast because I want to share what the Lord had taught me, what I have learned from the Lord in all these 11, almost 12 years in the classroom teaching. Because believe me, I learned a lot. He had taught me a lot. Sometimes I do believe that I was born to be a student. I love learning. I love learning. You give me something to learn and I'll be investigating all about it in in very quick and very little time. So I wanted to start this episode talking about Thursday this week. I do believe the Lord was teaching me a big lesson to prepare me for this episode. He likes to do the stuff like that. He likes to. You're gonna be talking about this? All right, then let's practice ourselves, And let's practice with the word of God. Thursday I was with my Spanish one class and they were asking what I thought it was, more questions than usual. Now don't get me wrong. I love that my students ask questions because that means they are doing their work, they're trying, they're interested, they're engaged. Don't get me wrong there. I'm okay. But I guess it was one of those special days for us ladies that our hormones are all over the place. And I wasn't sure if I was cold, if I was hot, if I was sleepy, if I was hungry. You know what I mean. And they were asking and asking and asking, and I can feel it coming. I can just feel it coming. And I was like, just keep watching the clock. You know, how much more of this? How much more of this? But I I do believe with all my heart now that I'm I'm actually telling you about patience and telling you about the fruit of spirit that I was going through a test, and I had to prove that I had learned this lesson and that I could share it with you because otherwise. How am I gonna tell you to do something that I'm not doing myself? Right? So Thursday was one of those super, super hard days for me. My students were asking all the questions. Can you imagine how hard that was? It was hard. It was really hard. It was like because my brain was going, This is things that you're supposed to know already. This is things you're supposed to know already. Will you have this in your notes? Just go look at your but. We had to remember. In my case, I'm working with teenagers. They don't remember what they have for breakfast. Of course they're not gonna remember the vocab is already in their notes. And they all had different needs just like I did that day. I was not feeling it that day. They all have different levels of energy. maybe some of them slept very well. Maybe some of they didn't sleep at all because they were done in that phone, you know that. Maybe they did not have breakfast. Maybe they had trouble at home. So I had to remind myself of all that stuff before I lose it and I just like But have you ever heard yourself responding in a tone that you did not intend to use? Meet you sister many times, many times, especially with the people that I love the most. Especially with my son. Because no, in the classroom, as much as I would love to sometimes, you do not say everything you would like to say. You do not react the way you would like to react. Those kids are now ours and we had to look professional, right? So when they really, really, really test my patient, I was like And pray. Pray sometimes. I write that in I should pray every time, but it's like Lord, hold me, Lord. Just please hold me, Lord. I had to remember who I belong to. And I had to remember who put me in that classroom. Because that classroom is my calling. And the Lord put me in there for a reason. I am not there by accident. My students are not there by accident. But what I really want to talk to you about today is how in those moments that we feel that we're gonna lose it, that we feel that the patience bucket is completely empty. How faith can help us respond differently. That's what we're going to talk about today. So, as I said before, we're gonna be in Galatians 5, 22 and 23. And I have my little notes right here. It says, But the fruits of the spirit is love. joy peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. And if you have your Bible, I would love for you to underline for this episode patience and self-control. We can do a bunch of episodes just with this Bible verse, but today our focus is on patience and self-control. That's why we're in. In that part of the Bible today. So when we feel overwhelmed, and I know you've been there, if you are a teacher, you have been there more than once. I want you to remind you that spiritual growth happened in those moments that our patience and a self-control are tested the most. That is where we can really see spiritual growth. Spiritual growth can happen more than anything in that classroom. When they are not listening, when they are talking over you, when the work is not getting done because somebody is distracting them. Your spiritual growth can happen in your kitchen while making dinner. When you're fixing your bed in your bedroom. Spiritual growth does not happen only. On Sunday mornings when we are worshiping as churches, it feels amazing. We're worshiping with our brothers and sisters in Christ, and we receive this Holy Spirit. That's beautiful. But the place where we show what we learn is in the test. If you're a teacher, you know that. I would love to just give a hundred to all my students. Good job and effort, you pay attention in class, you can pass. That doesn't work like that. I'm going to teach you, I'm going to teach you, I'm going to teach you. But in my classroom, every four weeks we have a really big unit test. And in the middle, we have little quizzes here and there, nothing huge. But it helps us see where they are. Our spiritual life works the same way. We have a little test here and there, a little test here and there. And if we can accomplish all those little tests, the Lord is probably going to send you a big unit test. And you better show what you learned. Did you really learn that the fruits of the spirit with all the other ones? Patience and self-control? Friend, this is a lesson that we're gonna be in for the rest of our lives. No, one unit test is not gonna do it. The final test is not gonna do it. You're gonna have to test on this subject forever because it's something that we can always learn. I am never gonna be perfect. with my patience. I am never gonna be perfect with my self control. I am never gonna be a perfect mom. I'm never gonna be a perfect teacher. But thank you, Jesus, there is a perfect God. And they can he can keep teaching me, I can keep growing, and I can keep learning from him. And I had to remember this is the main point of this whole podcast. If you can remember anything of any episode, just remember this one thing grace over perfection. Grace over perfection. Every time, friend, patient. Like I say before. This Thursday was not one of my most perfect days. I had to, I want you to believe my hormones had a lot to do in there. I couldn't sleep very well. I was not well rested. They were asking too many questions. I thought I was gonna lose it. I ended up that day so, so tired. Again, maybe I was going through my unit test. Because that felt very overwhelming to be just a little quiz. Now, did I pass? I don't. Think I might 100, but I might make a 70, which is enough to pass. But no, it was not one of my best days to show what I have learned. Self-control, friends, self-control. It doesn't mean that when I feel angry or when I feel frustrated, I'm gonna have to keep all that in me, but it's how am I gonna react. I cannot control everything that is going to happen in my classroom. I wish. But with 85 kids, how do we do that? I cannot control everything that happens in my house. I cannot say when something is gonna break, when something's gonna stop working, when my child is gonna remember he has homework at 9 30 p.m. But I can work on the way I react to things. And that's what we're gonna focus on today. Gentleness, one of the fruits of the spirit, gentleness. Gentleness is not weakness. It doesn't mean you're weak. it is important to correct behavior. It is important to get their attention when we need to. And it is very important that they know that I am in charge in that class. Now, how I'm gonna do it is gonna make the whole difference of how they're gonna react to what I'm trying to teach them. So let's go to the classroom for a little bit. We're gonna day specifically in the classroom because we as teachers spend so much time in there. Sometimes I sit there and think, my goodness, all I see every day is these four walls. And in my school, the walls are the walls are blocked, concrete block, and they painted in this sad gray. It's not very inviting. Now I teach Spanish. So my classroom is full of pinatas and colorful things and we hang everything from the ceiling and I got Beautiful boards out on the wall and everything. So it helps. But there's still only four walls. Sometimes when I had to grade a lot of stuff, I get a desk in the hallway. And I grade stuff in the hallway because I'm tired of watching those four walls. I have a one small window in my classroom, but when you look through the window, all you see is a wall of brick. So sometimes I do think, my goodness, the whole day went by. And all I saw was this four wall. What these four brick walls. But We do spend a lot of time in there. So that's where we get to serve the Lord. a few days ago, I had to. I I was asking my class to please you. It's okay for me that you talk when you work because they were they had work to do. But don't get louder and louder and louder and louder. And then it's the point that you're just talking and laughing. And I know you're not doing your work. I just know it. So my voice had to raise. And they all stood like. Because I usually don't do that. Miss Pock talks very loud, but she doesn't yell in class. I just don't. I don't think that works. I do believe that if I just wait for them just completely stop and then I talk and I can talk in a regular voice, I'm gonna get more from them than if I just start yelling and being louder than they are. So I don't really do that. I don't yell in class. But as I say, I was having a unit test. I do believe I was having a unit test on patients. And I did not pass that one. Or maybe that was a quiz. I did not pass that one. I felt that one because I felt it. It was coming. I asked in about three times. It didn't stop. So I had to go listen class in a very louder tone of voice. You know, a louder tone of voice. And I started selling them. I don't mind you talking when you're working as long as you're engaged and keep talk and keep working. But getting louder and louder and louder, and they were like, but after that, after that, they work in complete silence I don't know if I scare them or what happened there, but hey, it worked. But I do not like I do not like raising my voice. And I had to look this up today because it really got my attention. Why do we respond differently when somebody is yelling at you? Or when somebody is just talking in a calm voice, but they are giving you the very same words. Why do we react different? Because I know that we all do. Our students do, our kids do, our husbands do. And as my husband tells me one thing and he's yelling at me, and then he'll tell me this very same words, just talking. Calmly, it will have a complete different reaction from me. But I wanted to know the science behind that. Why do we react differently? Why is it so different? And this is why I learned we don't respond only to the words that we hear. We also respond to the way the words make us feel. And that would just make my brain just so loud, the moment you start yelling at me. My brain registers that as aggression threat. I gotta protect myself. When I hear a calm voice, the message comes through easier, and my brain is ready to listen to the message that you're trying to give me. That is the huge difference. So, friend, if you have been losing your patient and losing your self-control and yelling. I want you to remember this. The person you're yelling at is not registering just the words that you're saying. Actually, because you're yelling, it might not even be listening to your message. Because all they can register is the fear, the threat, and I had to protect myself. You're angry at me. I don't even know what you said. Now, if you choose to give the same message in a calm way, the person is going to listen. And chances are we can have a conversation. That's where the difference is. And I found that fascinating. And of course, there is a Bible message in this because the Lord took care of absolutely every single aspect of our lives. And this is in Proverbs 15:1. Proverbs 15:1 says, a soft answer. Turn away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger. And I'm going to read that again because I know you need to listen to it. A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger. Remember that the next time you're about to answer to a situation in the classroom, at home, with your kids, your own kids, with your students, with your husband, with your relatives. This lesson is a hundred percent for me this week, but I love the fact that I'm able to share it with you. Mama, teacher, you can be a strong teacher without being an angry teacher. Mom, you can be an amazing mama without being an angry mama. Grace over perfection please. Remember that. So, what are the things that have helped me in the situations? Because remember, I am not giving you advice, I am sharing with you things that have helped me in all this learning process, in this amazing learning process that the Lord has given me through my classroom. Create a transition ritual. For me, that comes easy because I drive an hour and 10 minutes to work. And that time is to decompress. To listen to worship music, maybe to listen to something funny and laugh. My son drives with me because he goes to the same district, but he sleeps on the way home. So there's no much talking in there. We talk when we get home. Sometimes, he feels like chatting. He's 13. So sometimes he does feel like talking and we just talk and laugh in the car. That has helped me Give yourself a few minutes to decompress. And if you only have a few minutes, friend, use that time to pray. Because there is no other better way to use that time. Pray. Talk to your father. Pause before correcting. Sometimes we feel like jumping. You come here, you did this, that. How are we practicing self-control? How am I practicing self-control? I had to learn that myself. And I'm not telling you this because I am perfect. I'm telling you this because I make many mistakes to make to make it there. And I would love to help you there. That's what I said at the beginning. This podcast is for me eleven years ago. When I thought that I had to do everything perfect, when I thought that I had to be the perfect man, the perfect teacher, the perfect wife, and now I was drowning. Perfection was never something that I was supposed to achieve. That is part of God's grace. He loves me in my imperfections. And I love the fact that He is perfect for me. Let's lower unnecessary expectations. Our kids are not gonna be perfect. I am not perfect. My students are not gonna be perfect. They don't have perfect homes. They do not home for the perfect environment. they probably don't have the perfect sleep. So they are not going to be perfect. Apologize when necessary. I lost the count of how many times I had to apologize to my own child for making a mistake, for not treating him very kindly. I had to do that. And I and I like doing that because I don't want him to have the expectations that mama is perfect either. Because mama is not perfect, not even close. Mama's a sinner. And mama's gonna make mistakes. But mama's gonna own it. And he she's going to apologize and say, I am sorry, I yell at you. I didn't mean to do that. I shouldn't have done that. I am sorry if I hurt your feelings when I yell at you. And I do that. Other than that and my thirteen year old son has shown me more grace than I have shown myself sometimes. It is not bad to apologize to your kids. Did you try it? And this is a question that I wanted to underline. Are we sometimes giving our students the patience and the grace we wish we had saved for our own kids? for ourselves. We do not show grace to ourselves enough. You need to save some of that patient for home because we are we talk about this in episode two. We are needed at home. Probably more than we're needed in that classroom. Because remember, if you quit today, tomorrow they'll be trying to find somebody to replace you. You're not replaceable at home. This week was especially hard for me. Remember, I have a unit test. And I I want you to believe I pass barely, but things that have helped me. When you had time when you are able, because I know we're not able, when you are able, go for a walk. 10, 15 minutes will help. I promise. Take a bath or a long hot shower. I don't remember when's the last time I took a bath. I keep telling myself I don't have time for that. But maybe if I get off my phone, I'll have more time for a bath. Wouldn't that be nice? Listen to worship music. It always helps me. It helps me in the morning. It helps me at the end of the day. Is it helps me when I'm feeling down? It helps me when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Listen to music. Sometimes in the classroom, when I'm feeling like everything is falling apart, I'll just put my headphones and I tell my kids I need three minutes. I need three minutes. And I sit there and I listen to worship music. And I do I I don't tell them what I'm doing, but I do believe they know what I'm doing. So they just stay quiet and say, guys, Miss Pock needs a minute. And then I'm ready to keep going. Let's go back to our Bible verse, Galatians 5, 22, 23. Remember all the fruits of the Spirit. These are not things that we had to try to achieve because I don't think you can try to be more patient. You can try to be more joyful. These are things that you are going to achieve if you spend time in the Word of God. Every day you spend time in the Word of God, and it's like a tree. You you water, you take care of it, you put good soil on it. And like it or not, that that plant is going to grow and it's going to have fruit. You're not trying for to have more patience or more kindness or more goodness. Your life is going to show that when you are filled with the spirit and you spend time in the word of God. When you are desperate and don't feel like you can go no more, I always go back to the Father. Where else am I gonna go? The Lord help me. Lord just help me. Lord just help me. I need you, Lord. It is okay to say that all the time actually. And let's remember this. The person disturbing your peace, the person yelling at you, the person that hurt your feelings. It's still someone that God loves. And I know that where when we are angry, that when we are hurt, when we are upset, it's very hard to remember that because I am the one that is suffering. I'm upset. I am crying. God also loves that person. Please don't forget that. Remember that spiritual growth happens when the Lord send us those trials. That's when we really grow. And that's why I believe the Lord gave me the week that He gave me. Because I was gonna be able to do this podcast episode a little bit better with the experience that I have this week. What might change if we pause to pray before raising our voices? Maybe that's something you would like to practice this week. Go back and remember Proverbs. A soft answer turned away wrath. A soft answer turns away wrath. Don't forget to apologize if you need to. Don't forget the God doesn't stop loving us when we mess up. my goodness, if He did. He loves us still when we mess up, when we lose our patience, when we lose our self-control. He's still there. Grace over perfection. Mom, teacher, we can learn, we can grow, we can start over. It is okay when we mess up. We just gotta. learn from that lesson. That's what we do. So I really hope that this lesson today over my journey with patient in the classroom and at home will help you. I really hope that encouraged you and just remember that no you're not called to be perfect. You're called to show grace to others and grace to yourself just the same way the Lord showed grace to us. And this is the last thing I'm going to leave you with today. And I want you to remember this. I cannot always control what happens in my classroom or in my house, but God can help and I can learn how to control the way I respond. You can control the way you respond. Everything else is in God's hands. I hope this episode has encouraged you. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. I really did enjoy this episode. Thank you so much for joining me. I'll see you in episode four. Have a blessed week, friend.