Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 318 - Stop putting yourself under insane pressure!

Transcript

Season 4 - Episode 318 - Stop putting yourself under insane pressure! · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Hey everybody, welcome to the good morning from the Chicken
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  Coop podcast. My name is Kim Johnson and I am
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  a mastermindset coach, creative strategist and also happened to
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  be a farmer. This is my chicken coop and I
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  come out here every day to record a.
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  Podcast to. Teach distinctions,
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  possibilities, new ways of thinking, and just bring some
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  joy. Into the.
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  World. So welcome to the coop, and
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  let's start your day off in a fantastic way.
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  Hey everybody good. Early morning, I'm tucked
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  inside. It's way too cold to be outside
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  yet and pitch dark so we are shooting from the garage.
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  We are talking today about being behind before you even started,
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  and this came up yesterday repeatedly in coaching sessions
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  with my one-on-one clients and people saying, Oh my gosh, I
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  haven't made my possibilities list.
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  Remember we talked about that last week.
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  My clients are all working on that.
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  I think it was last week or the week before we did it.
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  But the possibilities list for any of you who have missed it,
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  is basically where you're sitting down and you're not
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  setting goals, you're just allowing your imagination to
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  take over and give you a very abundant list of things you
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  possibly would want to do, not that you're committing to do.
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  I'm just possibly thinking like, wow, I'd love to do that.
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  Like for instance, on my possibility list, it's going and
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  taking drawing classes. Like literally sitting down and
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  taking drawing classes, which I always resisted doing as a child
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  because I didn't want to be told when I should draw.
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  And no one reframed it for me. So I stuck with that theory,
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  which was not necessarily the best theory in the world, but
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  neither here nor there. They weren't struggling because
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  they felt like they were already behind because here we are the
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  15th, and they don't have anything done.
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  They're like, oh, I don't have my possibilities list done.
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  I haven't even thought about my other stuff yet.
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  And they're just going on and on and on.
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  And the stress is building and building and building.
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  And I immediately have to remind them when they're like this, no
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  one is coming to arrest you for not having your possibility list
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  done. No one is coming and saying, did
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  you debrief 2025 yet? Well, first of all, it's not
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  finished. So you don't have to have your
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  debrief for 2025 done. And if you don't want to debrief
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  it, don't. It, it it's that simple.
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  If you don't want to do the debrief, don't do it.
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  I have a handful of clients out of all the ones that I coach
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  that say I just want to let this year go.
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  I don't want to think about it. And I'm like, that is completely
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  OK, just let it go. Just move forward.
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  If that's what's in your heart and that's what you need to do
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  to feel better, then that's what you do in that moment.
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  You don't take the stress of putting more on your plate
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  because the world is willing to give you as much on your plate
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  as you can. As as I like to think of it, you
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  know, you think of a shore bird and like a Pelican and they have
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  a gullet. And that gullet gets filled with
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  fish. And you watch them swallow fish
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  whole. What they're doing is they're
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  filling their garlic. They will eat as much as they
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  can to stuff that gullet, even though it is probably stuffed
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  right up to the top, They'll they'll still keep going.
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  Well, guess what? The world will give us as much
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  to do as we are willing to allow into that gullet that we have.
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  So unless you decide to say, hey, I need to put some
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  boundaries around this. I need to push back on some of
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  this. It'll keep giving you stuff and
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  you'll keep feeling behind and it will it'll keep stacking and
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  causing problems. So the first thing that you must
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  remember in especially at this time of the year, no one is
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  coming to arrest you for not having your goals done yet, not
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  having intentions set, not doing a debrief, not having
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  possibilities. Whatever you're doing, whatever
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  you're working on, no one's coming to hit you on the hands
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  and say, hey, hey, causing that anxiety to come up.
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  And believe me, I know I used to do this to myself all the time.
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  And I have to remind myself especially like around my space,
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  I have to always say, listen, Martha Stewart is not showing up
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  here to arrest me for not having something set out perfectly
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  because my space is so important.
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  My external space is so important to my internal
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  well-being. I, I can't explain it, but it
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  is. And I as much as over the years,
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  I, I've let things go, I have also incorporated ways that I
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  can work with that. Meaning if, if I'm, if I'm going
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  to be as uptight as I am about having the bed made just the
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  right way, then I have to be the one that makes the bed.
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  I can't expect somebody else to do it.
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  So one, do not, do not allow yourself to beat yourself up.
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  Do not allow yourself to torture yourself because that's useless.
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  2 Take a deep breath and sit down and really decide what are
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  those hierarchies of things that need to be done?
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  Where, what does that hierarchy look like right now?
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  So if you know you've got something really urgent that has
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  to be done, you put it at the top and you eat the broccoli
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  first, my friends, you just do it.
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  And three, it's really, really important, I mean excruciatingly
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  important to recognize that you have the official last word of
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  what gets done in the order it gets done.
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  So you can say to somebody, especially like in corporate
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  world, you can say, OK, these are the five things that you've
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  put on my plate, which means they stuff them in your gullet.
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  And I have a curiosity about what order you want them done in
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  because I would like to do them thoroughly and well.
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  So what order would you like them done in thoroughly?
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  And well, if you want me to rush and get them all done, I can do
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  that, but they are not going to be thoroughly done well.
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  And sometimes it takes reminding somebody, a boss, a supervisor,
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  that that's the that's the case. I can do them all, but I'll do
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  them half ass and they'll be done.
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  But they won't be done. Well, do you want them done?
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  Well, then tell me the order you want them done in.
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  And then you give them a projection.
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  And honestly, that really changes things because it makes
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  the other person think, ah, OK. And sometimes they go, great,
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  let's pick the order. And sometimes they go, no, just
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  do them. And you go, OK, and you go off
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  and you do it. And I've been in both
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  situations, but at least it gives them awareness of it.
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  So stop panicking. Stop forcing yourself to go into
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  that headspace, take a deep breath and recognize deeply you
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  have control over this and no one is coming to arrest you for
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  this. There have been years.
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  I think two years ago I didn't get my goals done until the end
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  of February, so there's nothing to worry about.
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  And guess what? My world didn't blow up.
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  OK my friends, take a deep breath and try to enjoy
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  yourselves and I will see you all tomorrow.
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  Bye.