Latest / Providence Voice / Mikeing Disciples - Interview: Andy Oguntola - #017

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Mikeing Disciples - Interview: Andy Oguntola - #017 · Providence Voice

0:15
SPEAKER_01: Welcome back to Miking Disciples.
0:17
SPEAKER_01: It's another episode.
0:18
SPEAKER_01: As you all know, every time we do this, we either have a teaching lesson where we're working our way through the Sermon on the Mount, but other times I'm privileged to have guests on.
0:26
SPEAKER_01: And today I've got Andy Ogintola, who's a community leader, a ministry leader, and just a great man of God.
0:33
SPEAKER_01: And so I'm excited to have him.
0:35
SPEAKER_01: We've been trying to do this for several months.
0:37
SPEAKER_01: Uh so I'm glad we could finally get it worked out, man.
0:39
SPEAKER_01: Welcome.
0:40
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for being here.
0:40
SPEAKER_00: It's amazing.
0:41
SPEAKER_00: Phenomenal studio.
0:43
SPEAKER_00: Phenomenal studio.
0:43
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, thank you.
0:44
SPEAKER_01: We're excited about it.
0:45
SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, God's just doing a lot of great things here through Providence Voice.
0:50
SPEAKER_01: And so we're glad that you're here.
0:52
SPEAKER_01: I'll kind of introduce you a little bit.
0:54
SPEAKER_01: You know, we we met years ago.
0:56
SPEAKER_01: It's been about 10 years ago.
0:58
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
0:58
SPEAKER_01: Um, I was asked to speak at a men's summit through at a local church here, and uh it's the first time I'd ever met you, first time I ever heard you or been around you, and I was just like, man, this guy, I want to get to know him.
1:11
SPEAKER_01: Um, I was intrigued really, I remember that day because you kind of mc'd the summit, right?
1:16
SPEAKER_01: And then just this past year, we did the summit 2.0 and uh we both spoke there, so that was a lot of fun.
1:22
SPEAKER_01: And um, I I hope we'll do it again sometime.
1:25
SPEAKER_01: And then it won't take 10 more years.
1:26
SPEAKER_01: So absolutely.
1:28
SPEAKER_01: But I remember that day.
1:29
SPEAKER_01: Uh you know, I was I was intrigued really by um your charisma, uh, by your joy.
1:35
SPEAKER_01: That was really one of the things that was right after my wife had passed away.
1:38
SPEAKER_01: And so when I met a man that was full of joy, not happiness based on circumstances, good or bad things in life, but just joy of the Lord that we should have.
1:47
SPEAKER_01: And then I watched the way that the other men gravitated towards you and talked to you and um wanted to be around you.
1:54
SPEAKER_01: And it's just like I I got to see my first meeting of you, who you really are, I think.
2:01
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I I think what I've observed is that you're the same man no matter what role you're in, where you're at, what coat you're wearing, what shirt you're wearing, any of those things.
2:12
SPEAKER_01: Um, and we don't know each other well, we don't get to spend a lot of time together.
2:16
SPEAKER_01: Ironically, our wives taught together at Lake Wells High School.
2:20
SPEAKER_01: And um Lana loved working with Laportia then, and um, you know, it was a blessing there.
2:25
SPEAKER_01: She's still at the high school?
2:26
SPEAKER_01: Yes, she is.
2:26
SPEAKER_01: Yes, she is.
2:27
SPEAKER_01: How many years has she been there?
2:28
SPEAKER_01: Oh, almost 10 years, almost a decade.
2:29
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
2:30
SPEAKER_01: So Lana's been there.
2:31
SPEAKER_01: I think this is her 11th year, maybe 12th, so not too long after that.
2:35
SPEAKER_01: Um, what role does she do there?
2:37
SPEAKER_01: So now she's been promoted to an MTSS coordinator.
2:39
SPEAKER_00: So she assists students and their disabilities and everything else in between.
2:43
SPEAKER_01: That's great.
2:43
SPEAKER_01: Okay, wonderful.
2:44
SPEAKER_01: Uh and Lana's teaching 11th and 12th grade English.
2:48
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
2:48
SPEAKER_01: Um, she's um on the other side of the building now, and and now I got a son that's teaching ninth grade English.
2:53
SPEAKER_01: He loves that.
2:54
SPEAKER_01: So, and he's the cross-country coach there, but that's a whole nother podcast, right?
2:58
SPEAKER_01: But um, I know they enjoyed getting to know each other, and I just appreciate you and and being a brother in Christ.
3:04
SPEAKER_01: And but I I want to hear more about who you are, and I I kind of want you to break this down a little bit who you are as a man, okay, as a husband, as a father, uh, as a community leader, a ministry leader, and whatever an author now, yeah, whatever other roles you have.
3:20
SPEAKER_00: So tell me who Andy Ogantola is.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: Thank you again for this opportunity.
3:24
SPEAKER_00: So when you think about me as a man, it comes from my mother and father, right?
3:27
SPEAKER_00: Um, specifically here, Ogantola, Nigerian background, both my parents from Nigeria, okay, born and raised, never had a high school, I mean college education.
3:35
SPEAKER_00: So I was one of the first in the family to actually go to college.
3:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
3:38
SPEAKER_00: Um, they really pushed that opportunity and said, Hey, we've never been there before, but you have to go.
3:42
SPEAKER_00: You have to experience this.
3:43
SPEAKER_00: Experience is for us, me and my four sisters.
3:45
SPEAKER_00: So I'm the only boy.
3:46
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
3:46
SPEAKER_00: Um, always been I never had hand-me-downs, so I'm excited about that, right?
3:49
SPEAKER_00: That's good considering they were all girls.
3:51
SPEAKER_00: I'm telling you, brother.
3:52
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
3:52
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that'd be another conversation, right?
3:55
SPEAKER_00: It's a different podcast.
3:56
SPEAKER_01: But yeah.
3:56
SPEAKER_00: But at the same time, I really understood hard work.
3:59
SPEAKER_00: My father put it in me, um, we always went to church faithfully.
4:02
SPEAKER_00: We had to have that understanding of the Lord himself, but mainly understanding hard work.
4:06
SPEAKER_00: My dad was a person that worked at Disney.
4:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, he never missed a day work in his whole life.
4:10
SPEAKER_00: So I remember when he retired at roughly 26 years of working at Disney, he had a record for the most uh in uh employee with a never taking any time off.
4:18
SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
4:19
SPEAKER_00: And so I saw that at the same time.
4:21
SPEAKER_00: So he showed me hard work, he showed me how to take care of our families, showed me how to be a provider, but showed me how to maintain integrity, right?
4:26
SPEAKER_00: He told me back in the day, he said, Son, you here's the rules.
4:29
SPEAKER_00: Uh you can't play sports um if you get two Bs.
4:32
SPEAKER_00: So I said, I don't I can only get one B a year.
4:35
SPEAKER_00: I would have been in trouble.
4:35
SPEAKER_00: That was a rule, one B a year.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: And so I remember this story I tell people all the time.
4:39
SPEAKER_00: I said, I remember one day I ended up getting um two or three Bs.
4:43
SPEAKER_00: I got home and my room was all gone.
4:46
SPEAKER_00: He took my TVs out, took everything out, and he's put nothing but books on the bed.
4:49
SPEAKER_00: And he said, I never sent you to school to play sports, I sent you this book, I sent you to school how to read.
4:53
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
4:53
SPEAKER_00: So it changed the foundation.
4:55
SPEAKER_00: Dad was hardcore, though.
4:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, he didn't play games, right?
4:58
SPEAKER_00: A traditional Nigerian dad and mom and everything else.
5:00
SPEAKER_00: And then from there, I I learned um through sports how to go to school.
5:04
SPEAKER_00: So I played college ball, of course.
5:06
SPEAKER_00: Um, my background is in pre-law.
5:07
SPEAKER_00: I always want to be an attorney.
5:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
5:09
SPEAKER_00: So my bachelor is in pre-law, uh, master's and of course a doctor's education.
5:14
SPEAKER_00: So that's really the man and the foundation of where I come from, right?
5:16
SPEAKER_00: The Christian biblical opportunity, um, understanding who God is, um, understanding making sure that I live a godly practice.
5:22
SPEAKER_00: I I am who I say I am, no matter what situation, what occurs, what situation or environment I'm in.
5:27
SPEAKER_00: The light still has to be the light.
5:29
SPEAKER_00: Um, when you think about it as a husband, right?
5:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, I only want one wife.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: Um, my wife is amazing.
5:36
SPEAKER_00: My wife is the reason why I am the person I am today.
5:39
SPEAKER_00: Um, sometimes, as a man, you never know who you encounter or who God's gonna bring you.
5:43
SPEAKER_00: But we have a saying, I married the perfect wife for me.
5:45
SPEAKER_00: Nice.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: I like that.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: I've never heard anybody say that.
5:48
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she is she's sharp, she's uh beneficial.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: But one thing she saw in me that I never saw in myself.
5:52
SPEAKER_00: I remember I asked her, we've been married for 15 years now, and I asked year two.
5:57
SPEAKER_00: I said, Can I ask you a question?
5:58
SPEAKER_00: I said, Why did you marry me?
6:01
SPEAKER_00: What was so special about me?
6:03
SPEAKER_00: And like clockwork, she said, I saw nothing but potential.
6:07
SPEAKER_00: She said, I saw nothing but potential.
6:09
SPEAKER_00: And she said, every and she said, now 15 years now, everything I saw back then is a a young man and pursuant, I saw everything that you are now.
6:17
SPEAKER_00: And so I realized back then that you uh potential has no mathematical formula, there's no equation for potential, it's just a feeling.
6:25
SPEAKER_00: It's it's that you can look at somebody and say, that person, he or she has potential, right?
6:29
SPEAKER_00: That's that that's that um um discernment in a sense, right?
6:32
SPEAKER_00: So she has she discerned it back then.
6:34
SPEAKER_00: And so um I I I I'm I I love her to pieces.
6:38
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I didn't realize you know, you're young, you think that your friends are your best friends, but really my wife is my best friend.
6:44
SPEAKER_01: That's the way it should be.
6:46
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that that is that is my best friend, that is my accountability partner, the person who can check me when I need to be checked, uh, who sees all the good and the bad.
6:52
SPEAKER_00: The one that says, Hey, listen, man of God.
6:54
SPEAKER_00: That's what she does.
6:54
SPEAKER_00: She says, Hey, listen here, man of God.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
6:57
SPEAKER_00: That that is the hey, get back and check, right?
6:59
SPEAKER_00: That's a standard right there.
7:00
SPEAKER_00: That is something that is responsible and something I can respond to because we've built that with each other.
7:04
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
7:05
SPEAKER_00: As a father, I wanted to give my children everything I didn't have.
7:08
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to make sure they experienced it, but I experienced it in a um a humble manner, making sure that I'm there from no matter what, because I remember growing up, my dad never came to any of my games, right?
7:16
SPEAKER_00: I had that story of I played basketball, football, ran track, my dad said, and I gotta go to work.
7:21
SPEAKER_00: So I never, I was a person that always looked in the stands and I stopped looking because I know nobody was gonna be there.
7:25
SPEAKER_00: I got more cheers from the audience than my own parents, but they were sacrificing and I didn't understand back then.
7:30
SPEAKER_00: Right.
7:30
SPEAKER_00: I didn't want my kids to feel the empty spirit that I had back then, so I make sure no matter what takes place, how busy I am, I'm always there for my children.
7:37
SPEAKER_00: Good.
7:37
SPEAKER_00: Um I I have to be there in the stands, I'm the number one supporter, the biggest cheerleader, everything you want all in one to make sure they're here.
7:43
SPEAKER_00: And nobody can, I don't want the enemy to ever come in and fill a void from a child because they said they're looking for the daddy.
7:50
SPEAKER_00: And so I need to make sure that I'm always there for my children.
7:54
SPEAKER_00: Um, as a community member, I mean, I think that's the service we do.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you one thing that comes and I think we take for granted is that there's so many kids who are unfortunate, so many kids who don't have what we have, and so many families who don't have what we have.
8:07
SPEAKER_00: And so if we have an abundance, why not share?
8:10
SPEAKER_00: And so that's how I look at it.
8:11
SPEAKER_00: I look at an opportunity where we can share with everybody around us, and my children understand that too.
8:14
SPEAKER_00: I always want to have a house where um be just because of the world the way it is, I didn't want my kids spending a night at everybody's houses and everything else.
8:20
SPEAKER_00: I want, hey, I want to have a house where people want to come too.
8:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, right.
8:23
SPEAKER_00: We want to be able to share the resources and let my kids understand that, hey, listen, you don't understand how blessed you truly are.
8:28
SPEAKER_00: And I don't think they still won't understand until they're married and they have children and they go through that process to see where we come from.
8:34
SPEAKER_00: Right?
8:35
SPEAKER_00: Um, but now we move into this author realm.
8:38
SPEAKER_00: We talk about, you know, uh this book for sea and the right ingredients, that came because um my mother passed away.
8:46
SPEAKER_00: And so as my mother passed away, there was so much knowledge in my mind that she shared with me and from a leadership perspective, and there's so many things that I wish I would have been able to share with her, but I wanted to create a leadership book that was different from anything else I've ever read.
9:00
SPEAKER_00: So many times you see leadership books where they talk about all the great things, they talk about all the things that happen and all the awards.
9:07
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to talk about the opposite side of leadership, the times when you get crushed, the times when you get hurt, the times where you need to pay attention, but you take your eyes off the prize and you get cut.
9:17
SPEAKER_00: That's what I wanted to focus on.
9:18
SPEAKER_00: And so a different perspective, but I wanted to complete something where that if she was still alive, she could read and say, son, I'm proud of you.
9:25
SPEAKER_00: Was my focus.
9:26
SPEAKER_00: And so when you look at all that, you look at that specific time of who I am, I'm just a regular Christian brother, a person that wants to serve, a person who wants to do what's right, a person who wants to take care of their family, but most importantly, go ahead and serve the community.
9:40
SPEAKER_01: I I love that.
9:41
SPEAKER_01: Uh, I love everything you said, and and even reading the book, um, you talked about how you you learned from just being around your mother, right, in the kitchen a lot of the times.
9:51
SPEAKER_01: And even every chapter has like a pot or a set of spoons or some kind of emblem there that deals with being in the kitchen.
9:59
SPEAKER_01: And I kind of love that.
10:00
SPEAKER_01: Um, what a great concept there.
10:02
SPEAKER_01: Um, tell me about did your parents they raise you in church then?
10:06
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
10:06
SPEAKER_00: In fact, so um so I was raised in church.
10:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, in fact, I was raised in the Catholic church first.
10:10
SPEAKER_00: Many people don't realize that.
10:11
SPEAKER_00: I didn't, yeah.
10:12
SPEAKER_00: So uh we're raised in the Catholic church, and I remember so people say, Well, what ended up happening?
10:16
SPEAKER_00: You know, what took place?
10:18
SPEAKER_00: It goes back to this wife of mine.
10:19
SPEAKER_00: And so when we were, when I was in college, I was I started going to the family church, you know, at a point in time it was called GSC Greater St.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: Thomas.
10:27
SPEAKER_00: And I was going there and I got engaged to my my wife, and we want to start marriage counseling.
10:31
SPEAKER_00: And as I started marriage counseling, we're having a conversation, and we're doing marriage counseling.
10:34
SPEAKER_00: I went to my mom and my dad, and we're having a conversation.
10:37
SPEAKER_00: My mom said, Son, you you you go to this uh Baptist church or this Pentecostal church, and but you were raised Catholic.
10:44
SPEAKER_00: Why is that?
10:45
SPEAKER_00: I said, Mom, the reason why is because I realized that if I wanted my wife to, and me and my wife got in a situation and I wanted my wife to speak to the first lady, who's she gonna speak to at the Catholic Church?
10:54
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's a great question, man.
10:56
SPEAKER_00: Wow.
10:57
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
10:58
SPEAKER_00: So that's where I came from.
11:00
SPEAKER_00: And my mom had that same look and that same realization as you had, and she said, huh.
11:05
SPEAKER_00: I said, because I said, I understand the priest is there, but what I realize is that the priest doesn't have a wife.
11:10
SPEAKER_00: And so when I'm going back and forth, and me and my wife are having a disagreement, and we're not seeing eye to eye, I want uh a neutral perspective.
11:17
SPEAKER_00: I want him to understand what I'm going through.
11:19
SPEAKER_00: And I realized that he couldn't.
11:20
SPEAKER_00: And that was a young me realizing that, and I said, I gotta go to a place where there's a first lady or uh a pastor who's over me, my shepherd who has a spouse who can go ahead and pour into me, and his wife can point to my wife.
11:30
SPEAKER_00: And so after I had a conversation with my mom, my mom no longer became Catholic.
11:34
SPEAKER_00: Oh, oh, okay, okay.
11:36
SPEAKER_00: My dad they became um, they can't started coming to our church whenever they're in the area as well.
11:40
SPEAKER_01: All right, okay, all right, good.
11:42
SPEAKER_01: Um Did you meet your wife at college?
11:44
SPEAKER_00: I wonder in church.
11:45
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
11:45
SPEAKER_00: The best place to meet her.
11:46
SPEAKER_00: There you go.
11:47
SPEAKER_00: All right, yeah.
11:47
SPEAKER_00: I have a saying, uh, I saw her in the praise team.
11:49
SPEAKER_00: I said I gotta marry her.
11:50
SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay.
11:51
SPEAKER_01: When you know, you know, man.
11:53
SPEAKER_01: Um how long how long did you guys date before you were like this is the lady?
11:58
SPEAKER_00: When you and sometimes you know, right?
12:00
SPEAKER_00: You know, you think about previous relationships years and years of being with somebody, but it was just a spirit to say this is the one.
12:06
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
12:07
SPEAKER_01: I know my first wife, I met her when we were students at Palm Beach Atlantic, 18-year-old kids.
12:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, um, when I met Lana, it was she and her kids started coming here to High Point Church.
12:18
SPEAKER_01: And um, I knew of her, but I didn't know her.
12:20
SPEAKER_01: She kind of knew of me, but she didn't know me.
12:22
SPEAKER_01: And we weren't either one of us looking for that, but it there just came this point where, yep, this is right, God's in this, and and uh I'm thankful for that now.
12:32
SPEAKER_01: Uh you talked about being in college and being an athlete.
12:35
SPEAKER_01: Well, tell us about that.
12:36
SPEAKER_01: Where did you go?
12:37
SPEAKER_01: What what role did you play there?
12:39
SPEAKER_00: So I ended up coming to Weber University right here in Lake West Florida, Babson Park, Florida.
12:43
SPEAKER_00: I uh had a dual scholarship to go to Troy on football and track, but it didn't work out for me because I uh fourth game of the season and I uh discated my ankle and fractured my tibia.
12:52
SPEAKER_00: Oh so fun times, right?
12:54
SPEAKER_00: But I tell my wife, if that didn't happen, I wouldn't have met her.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: Right.
12:56
SPEAKER_00: I wouldn't have had the kids that I have right now.
12:58
SPEAKER_00: So I was able to come over here to Weber University.
13:01
SPEAKER_00: The plan was to sit there for a year and transfer.
13:03
SPEAKER_00: At that point in time, I said, you know what, this is fine.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: I'm doing okay.
13:06
SPEAKER_00: Uh a small, small atmosphere.
13:08
SPEAKER_00: Um I was going to school, get everything done.
13:10
SPEAKER_00: And when I graduated, I wanted to go to Stetson Law School.
13:13
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
13:13
SPEAKER_00: And the week before graduation, I got an opportunity and they said, Hey, we want you to become an admissions counselor.
13:18
SPEAKER_00: We don't, I don't even know what that was at that point in time.
13:20
SPEAKER_00: And that's how my educational process fell.
13:22
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
13:24
SPEAKER_00: My goals, I again that attorney was in me.
13:26
SPEAKER_00: I like that feel in the courtroom.
13:27
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to, you know, do that law, but I think that God had a different opportunity for me.
13:34
SPEAKER_00: And and in doing so, I've learned so much in this realm, this education realm, right?
13:39
SPEAKER_00: One, you want to find the right people to take care of our children.
13:42
SPEAKER_00: Many times we see stuff on TV and we say, Man, I wish I had the right person.
13:46
SPEAKER_00: I wish this teacher was there or this educator was there.
13:49
SPEAKER_00: I want to be a person that was never making excuses.
13:51
SPEAKER_00: I want to be in the room, help making decisions.
13:53
SPEAKER_00: And so that's why I fell in love with this game of education now.
13:56
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
13:56
SPEAKER_01: And so I I think there's something to listen to there.
13:59
SPEAKER_01: You know, there's guys listening to this and they're frustrated at their job or where they're at in life, and you know, they wish they had more, or they wish they were over here doing that.
14:08
SPEAKER_01: And the grass always looks greener on the other side, right?
14:11
SPEAKER_01: But it's really greener where we cultivate it, where we water it.
14:14
SPEAKER_01: And um it's it sounds like you really quickly learned the secret of what Paul says being content.
14:21
SPEAKER_01: I'm right where I need to be, and I'm gonna trust him to take me wherever he needs to take me.
14:26
SPEAKER_01: And so he just kind of altered your path a little bit.
14:30
SPEAKER_01: Really, he got you on the path that he wanted for you.
14:32
SPEAKER_01: And um, so you have to be in a place where you submit to his will and start doing the things that that God wants you to do.
14:39
SPEAKER_01: And now this is what you've just made a career out of, and he continues to use you in different arenas within the education realm, right?
14:47
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
14:47
SPEAKER_01: Uh what are you doing now on that?
14:49
SPEAKER_00: So, right now, uh I am the assistant vice president of Florida Polytechnic University, okay.
14:52
SPEAKER_00: Um in Lakeland, Florida.
14:54
SPEAKER_00: Uh, really, where giving students opportunity, just trying to find the best and brightest students all over the nation, right?
14:58
SPEAKER_00: We search them out for a STEM degree.
15:00
SPEAKER_00: Um, really push that.
15:01
SPEAKER_00: But at the same time, all the different committees and boards I'm on locally and in Paul County, just making sure we talk about education, we look at different opportunities for so ours, uh putting backpack on children, um, make sure children's child children read in our area, make sure literacy is in the right area, uh right ball game, but really, really pushing and making sure uh students understand there is something outside of what they under what they what they really know.
15:25
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
15:26
SPEAKER_01: And so um you you're doing that, but then all that is kind of fueled by, or you get refreshed, I would, I would maybe say, by going and being a part of the family church.
15:36
SPEAKER_01: Tell me about that.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: That's the good stuff right there, right?
15:38
SPEAKER_00: The best part.
15:39
SPEAKER_00: So the family church is our pastor, is Daniel Williams.
15:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, great friend of mine.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: A current city commissioner as well, and he is an amazing man of God.
15:46
SPEAKER_00: He is the he was my youth pastor when I was at Weber University.
15:50
SPEAKER_00: So when I was when I was going over there, I saw a bald head man on fire running around screaming and hollering.
15:56
SPEAKER_01: That is a great description of him.
15:57
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, spitting image right there.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: In fact, so we we have a running joke back in the day.
16:01
SPEAKER_00: When I when I was in college, it was John Kimbrough.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: Um, um, rest in peace, uh, Brother Kimbrough, um, Minister Marcus Kirby at that point in time, and Daniel Williams.
16:10
SPEAKER_00: And Bishop Roscoe was a pastor.
16:11
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:12
SPEAKER_00: And so I was surrounded by these men.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: All right, these men.
16:15
SPEAKER_00: I said, these are really some strong, godly men who really uh believe in the Lord, who want to push the opportunity, but also too, are holding young men accountable.
16:23
SPEAKER_00: And so as I was going to church and seeing these, we were just sharing conversation.
16:27
SPEAKER_00: We were breaking bread through fellowship.
16:29
SPEAKER_00: You know, we had men of integrity.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: You remember back in the day on Mondays, that was the place to be.
16:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:34
SPEAKER_00: Every Monday in Pol in Lake Wales, we used to have 30 to 40 men sitting faithfully for an hour.
16:39
SPEAKER_00: That was the only time wives or girlfriends didn't even ask where you were because they knew you were at church, right?
16:43
SPEAKER_00: You have no, you didn't have no hall back.
16:45
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, please go.
16:46
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, go, go, please take somebody with you.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: Uh and so that was the opportunity, and I fell in love with it.
16:51
SPEAKER_00: I fell in love with what we were doing.
16:53
SPEAKER_00: And since then, the church has grown, right?
16:55
SPEAKER_00: We've, of course, changed our name from Gator St.
16:57
SPEAKER_00: Thomas to the family church.
16:58
SPEAKER_00: Our pastor at that point in time was Bishop Roscoe Williams, who's now our bishop, and our youth pastor Daniel Wins is now our pastor of the church.
17:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh, and and right now, you know, we take it seriously because we're all family in Christ.
17:08
SPEAKER_00: Right.
17:09
SPEAKER_00: And so when you look at it, that is why we are the family church.
17:11
SPEAKER_00: We believe in our brothers and sisters to take us to another level and really moving in.
17:15
SPEAKER_00: Um, our goal right now is to hopefully build a new sanctuary shortly.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:19
SPEAKER_00: We're going through that process.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: We're really excited about that, and hopefully uh we'll see what God has for us.
17:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
17:24
SPEAKER_01: I and I love that, you know, you're right on about the family church.
17:28
SPEAKER_01: Having been there for a couple of times, I remember visiting there the day that Daniel was installed.
17:34
SPEAKER_01: Um, and then uh I of course I've been there for the summit just this past year as well, and you know, felt incredibly welcome.
17:42
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
17:43
SPEAKER_01: And I love that our churches do stuff and support each other.
17:46
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
17:46
SPEAKER_01: And it's not a competition, right?
17:48
SPEAKER_01: It's part of the body of Christ.
17:50
SPEAKER_01: And and there are other great churches in this city that name the name of Jesus and we pray for and support them as well.
17:55
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but we've just struck up some friendships in in these churches, and I love that you guys have come here to learn some things and um to just sit with us, and we've also gone there, and you know what?
18:06
SPEAKER_01: We've learned some things here from you all.
18:08
SPEAKER_01: Um, one of the things I I first met Pastor Daniel, he and I worked at Heartland for Children together.
18:13
SPEAKER_01: That's right.
18:14
SPEAKER_01: So I worked in uh the nonprofit world for six years, was kind of trying to take a break from ministry.
18:20
SPEAKER_01: I wanted to be a permanent one.
18:22
SPEAKER_01: There isn't, that doesn't exist.
18:24
SPEAKER_01: Um, God just kind of gave me some time to get refreshed.
18:27
SPEAKER_01: That's how we ended up here at High Point Church.
18:29
SPEAKER_01: And I ended up there because my um master's degree is in education, okay, working with students at risk.
18:35
SPEAKER_01: I actually never thought I'd use it.
18:37
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I ended up doing that at Heartland for Children and also Career Source Polk for two years and uh loved what I did.
18:45
SPEAKER_01: In fact, I cried the day God told me to leave Heartland for Children, because I was coming on here full time.
18:50
SPEAKER_01: Not because I didn't want to be here at High Point, but because that place was so helpful to me.
18:57
SPEAKER_01: So my first wife, Kelly, worked there with me at one point.
19:01
SPEAKER_01: She worked in post-adoption and um she introduced me to Daniel actually and um got to know him there.
19:07
SPEAKER_01: I spent a lot of time with him.
19:09
SPEAKER_01: We would go out to lunch.
19:10
SPEAKER_01: We would do this thing called man lunch once a month.
19:13
SPEAKER_01: And uh I don't know who started it there, but when I got started the job there, they were like, hey, you're coming to man lunch with us this Friday.
19:20
SPEAKER_01: What's that?
19:21
SPEAKER_01: It's just the men of the organization going out to lunch.
19:24
SPEAKER_01: And women can come, but if they come, they have to pay the bill.
19:26
SPEAKER_01: That's it.
19:28
SPEAKER_01: I don't think anybody ever took them up on it.
19:29
SPEAKER_01: I can't imagine why.
19:30
SPEAKER_01: But we would just pick places to go eat and we would just sit there and talk.
19:34
SPEAKER_01: And um, I I think that's a concept we need to revisit here.
19:38
SPEAKER_01: But um, I I got to know him.
19:41
SPEAKER_01: You don't have to be around Daniel very long to know the kind of man he is, like yourself.
19:46
SPEAKER_01: And um when I I remember when the cancer came back, he's one of the first people I called.
19:51
SPEAKER_01: His testing is amazing.
19:53
SPEAKER_01: I I absolutely I can tell you where I was when I called him and when we talked.
19:58
SPEAKER_01: Um, and and it didn't matter what he had going on in his life, then he stopped and prayed for us and uh continued to do that, continued to walk with through that with me.
20:08
SPEAKER_01: And there were so many men like that.
20:10
SPEAKER_01: And so that's where I got to know him, and we've just have stayed friends.
20:14
SPEAKER_01: You know, we actually both left Heartland within a year of each other, I think, to go into full-time ministry.
20:20
SPEAKER_01: So we share that with each other, and um, I just have loved seeing what God's accomplishing, not just through him, because he's not a lone ranger leader, all of you guys that are there, and um, it's been a privilege to the times that I've been around you all.
20:36
SPEAKER_01: I love to see what's going on in that local church.
20:41
SPEAKER_01: That honestly, man, you guys are killing it there.
20:44
SPEAKER_01: You guys are on a different part of Lake Wells, kind of the other side of the city.
20:48
SPEAKER_01: And I kind of love that we're both on the opposite sides, but we're really trying to do the same thing to take Jesus everywhere we can in this community.
20:56
SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, when I was there for the summit with you this year, you all showed us the plan that you have for the new building and some of those things you're dreaming about and praying about.
21:06
SPEAKER_01: But I really love the fact that you guys will do anything you possibly can to reach your community.
21:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that local area that you're in.
21:15
SPEAKER_01: Um, and and you'll empower people, and more importantly, you're pointing all of those people to Jesus.
21:20
SPEAKER_01: So if it's college students from Weber that need a place to live, that need Bibles, that need shoes, whatever, I think Pastor Daniel, isn't he the chaplain of the Warner football team now?
21:31
SPEAKER_01: Just different things like that.
21:33
SPEAKER_01: Um, I've seen where clips of of the team coming to your church for baptisms.
21:39
SPEAKER_01: Man, that's powerful.
21:40
SPEAKER_01: You know, those kids are there for a few years and then they go wherever God sends them.
21:45
SPEAKER_01: But hopefully, while they've been with you, you've had the opportunity to pour into them and point them to Jesus.
21:52
SPEAKER_01: And that's the whole goal there.
21:53
SPEAKER_01: We've got college students here.
21:55
SPEAKER_01: I actually spoke at Warner this morning for chapel and um saw some friendly.
22:00
SPEAKER_01: faces kids that that come to our church here and and uh I I loved it right and because it's that opportunity to just pour into them and I wish that when I was a student back in the the day that um there was a church that that was really pursuing me and helping me pursue Jesus then yeah and and maybe there were and I just didn't realize it there was a church right next to campus but there wasn't a lot of people that were saying hey come on over here man hang out with us um let let's do a a man lunch there or let's get together for men of integrity whatever it is right they didn't have that um so they had a like a young adult service but I went there to try to meet girls understand I understand but you know my girlfriend and and later wife used to go to that so it worked out pretty well but I I just think that it's important tell me about some of the things you've seen God do there at the family church man you you've touched on something amazing I want to touch on the cancer piece right okay uh specifically because our pastor he has such an amazing testimony at one point in time he had the fastest growing uh tumors in Polk County you know pretty much they said he was that's not a distinction you want no he he was no and he and in fact he carries around his x-rays with him all the time as his testimony because he when he meets somebody with cancer he says let me just show you something this is me and you see all the the lumps all over his body you see everything taking place and I can sit here and say in my almost 20 years of being in that church every person that has had cancer come to that church has been afraid.
23:30
SPEAKER_00: Wow and so anytime so you you you know you when you have something you feel like uh this is this is uh the DNA this is the the reservoir towards um a solution anytime somebody says they have cancer I say hey you need to come to my church you need to talk to my pastor you you you know I need to connect you it's just an immediate thought um because I believe that there's something in the water over there right I believe there's something that needs to occur and so from I see our elders to um um visitors to come in from college students who've ever had a cancer issue they've all been healed wow and it takes place right because God is always in the midst yeah right the Bible says when the two or three are gathered he is there and so you're seeing it consistently and and and it had to go through and I don't know and I know our pastor didn't want to go through it but he had to go through it going to have this testimony to know that if you want to be cancer free come see me.
24:17
SPEAKER_00: Right?
24:17
SPEAKER_00: That is what takes place right because we believe in the power of prayer yeah is definitely over there.
24:22
SPEAKER_00: Right and then you talk about the the the Warner football team of course Coach Burks shout out to Coach Burks who is uh one of our members at our church who's the head coach of the football team to for me in the last four years to see over 200 plus students men of God come and get baptized is amazing.
24:40
SPEAKER_00: That is incredible.
24:41
SPEAKER_00: You know just this this year alone we saw roughly 60 to 70 students get baptized the year before 80 plus students get baptized the year before another 80 to 100 students get baptized and we feed and we fellowship and have conversations but what takes place these were kids who were lost there were sheep that are out there who were who are grazing and eating and everything else but they were they didn't know where they were going because one they were dumb sheep.
25:01
SPEAKER_00: But the shepherd came and said you know what let me go ahead and show you the well let me show you what you should properly let me let me put you on the right path and I've watched student after student after student come and grow because I was one that student.
25:21
SPEAKER_00: But when I got to college and college is an opportunity where you can fall off grace or find the right pace.
25:28
SPEAKER_00: And so during that because of the the family church I was able to meet the pastor and have those conversations and it put me in the right place where I said you know what this is a spot for me.
25:37
SPEAKER_00: And my unfold my whole family came because of that church.
25:40
SPEAKER_00: So that's why for me it's been a blessing.
25:43
SPEAKER_00: That's why for me there's been so much um humility is why for me I have to do everything possible I can to make sure we bring more men and young men to that church because I see myself back then I see myself 15 years ago I see myself as a college student who didn't know what to do, who didn't have anything to eat.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: Oodles and noodles and I can go to church on Sunday and get a nice cooked meal because part of it is we say you know what every student who comes in has to be adopted by a church family member.
26:06
SPEAKER_00: And so our goal at our church is to make sure if you have a student there you take them home on a Sunday and prepare at least one hot meal a month.
26:11
SPEAKER_00: Wow okay so for a student who has been eating hot noodles and everything else in between and now you can get a nice meal, they change the ballgame for you.
26:18
SPEAKER_01: Yeah yeah well and and the um the trust you build up and the opportunity to just mentor them and and bring them along in Christ that's what that's discipleship at its core, right?
26:30
SPEAKER_01: That you have men and women in this church that are living for Jesus that are live modeling that out they're shining their light in this dark world and then other people are coming alongside them and those people are coming to Jesus and then who knows where these students that got baptized are going to end up 20 years from now.
26:50
SPEAKER_01: I'm sure it'd be nice if they were all at family church still right you wouldn't mind that.
26:54
SPEAKER_01: But if God sends one of them to um you know um Georgia or Tennessee or wherever uh does he what what plan does he have for them?
27:04
SPEAKER_01: What have they learned from you that they're gonna instill and is going to keep them on that path um I I just that it's so amazing to think about that and uh to think about the legacy that you guys are building and and the things that you've seen God do.
27:19
SPEAKER_01: What is one thing that you're still waiting for God to do there?
27:23
SPEAKER_00: Oh wow so when I think about our our ministry right we talk about um being a diverse church is what we're waiting for.
27:32
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
27:32
SPEAKER_00: Right so our church right now is I'm about 90% African American and our pastor always says we long for the days of our real diverse church.
27:41
SPEAKER_00: Right when you look in the audience and you see what heaven will look like.
27:44
SPEAKER_00: Yeah yeah right yeah because heaven is just not one color.
27:47
SPEAKER_00: Correct.
27:48
SPEAKER_00: Right and so we want to be able to say you know what it we come here and we solve all situations all races everything else in between where everybody can receive a word and praise and worship is on fire from top to bottom with all the human bodies all together and I think that's what we're waiting for.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: Right because we know the the the the the church doors will open we we know that the the new church and the sanctuary is coming but at the same time we want to serve God's people yeah and that's the goal right we want to make sure that um and now we we have this stat and we know there's over a hundred churches in Lake Wales.
28:17
SPEAKER_01: This little bitty Lake Wales crazy right over a hundred and hundred churches in Lake Wales yeah it's a mind boggling number and you say to yourself and you know be honest right how many of them doing God's work right right who is really doing God's work and we want to be a church that does his work.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: Yeah right imagine in Lake Wales of all a hundred churches had the same voice right if all the hundred churches ran the same song a hundred churches did the same walk how powerful Lake Wells can actually be how powerful Poe County now changes overnight.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: And I think that's for me as a still as a young minded individual to say you know what man I I wish the day would come.
28:59
SPEAKER_00: It's like the Tower of Babel right where everybody comes together and you know if they all come together there's nothing they can't accomplish so what if what do you all can together?
29:07
SPEAKER_00: Imagine what we can actually get done.
29:09
SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
29:09
SPEAKER_01: And I think that's a dream that matches God's heart you know and uh I I love that um we we have um started to see that a little bit here that you know I don't know what the percentage is but we are becoming more and more diverse now we moved as you know five years ago from uh Burns Avenue out here to the to the suburbs of Lake Wells um and um just moving five or ten minutes up the road has really opened up a whole new avenue for us.
29:39
SPEAKER_01: We have people coming from Lakeland, Pointiana Davenport.
29:43
SPEAKER_01: I mean these people are driving 45 minutes to an hour to come at Dundee, you know um Eagle Lake it just has opened that up and we didn't see that before.
29:52
SPEAKER_01: And I don't know I I don't know that the move itself the geographic change has brought about that but I think we're just at a place as a church where we want to do whatever God tells us to do to whoever he brings our way which is what I hear you saying.
30:07
SPEAKER_01: And what we've seen then because we haven't you know um okay let's get 30% of Hispanics uh within the next three years there's no goal plan like that there's no conversations going on in staff meetings like that it's just happening correct and it's happening because we are obedient and wanting to do what God wants and he's bringing the people here that he wants here.
30:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah and I know without a doubt as you as you guys stay faithful he's gonna do the same for so we're definitely praying with you about that for sure.
30:37
SPEAKER_01: And and like I said we we love you guys.
30:40
SPEAKER_01: We're excited to see what God's doing can't wait to see how he unfolds his plan with that new building and what a blessing that's going to be.
30:49
SPEAKER_01: Yes it is and there are people that are going to come because of curiosity we've experienced that and if I can say one thing put some things in place some some teams some strategies some ministry plans to sustain that growth gotcha um it that's one of the things that we've learned and and we're you know working on that um one of the things we're doing too and this is just something I'll throw out to you we're working we've got young adults we got three of them that have joined our staff as ministry residents.
31:19
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
31:19
SPEAKER_01: And so we can talk about this more later on you and I but it's uh we're working with this organization that's helping us and so these people are all I I think the oldest one's 24.
31:31
SPEAKER_01: So they're like 19 you know 20 22 24 um and they are with us for two years a part of our staff they're sitting in our staff meetings and then they're being coached by one of our ministry leaders and then they're giving given responsibilities not just oh here um enter these names in the database but like what how can we launch this team how can we launch this ministry initiative so I would say um if if there's any way that you can take some of those college students and and group them in and get them going in ministry you're gonna be even better off right um they were talking about that at Warner this morning and that's something that that we're excited about.
32:15
SPEAKER_01: And um so I maybe that's just something that's helpful to you.
32:19
SPEAKER_01: You know I I don't know how that works for you but you know are they going to make mistakes?
32:23
SPEAKER_01: Of course yeah we all make mistakes brother but the point was when I started in ministry at 27 I made mistakes too I still am even at 54 but um now I've had people to coach me to say hey come here come here for a minute let me put my arm around you let me talk to you about what you just said or did or the attitude that you had or here's what we are expecting of you and how you can get better in this and it's just um it's a it's an environment that cultivates growth for them it also um lets them learn and make some of those mistakes in um where they don't have to fear what's going to happen.
33:04
SPEAKER_01: Gotcha you know we're we're coaching them and walking with them.
33:07
SPEAKER_01: We're discipling them.
33:08
SPEAKER_01: Yeah which is exactly what we're talking about.
33:11
SPEAKER_01: What else are you hoping to see God do there?
33:14
SPEAKER_00: So when we look at it, we of course want to you know we're gonna expand and but I really want to see us open more retail spaces right for that whole community area.
33:22
SPEAKER_00: You know so in the Highland Park Manor area we know that we serve a specific population of individuals but making sure we have you know some bookstores you know you know we have some some clothes we can give away you know one one of the biggest things and I love our care center but I think also too our pros our care center and our weakness our care center.
33:40
SPEAKER_00: Because sometimes when a man or woman God who's come searching for something we all might push them and say go here and we should be able to serve them.
33:46
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
33:47
SPEAKER_00: And I think that we're gonna get to a place where we can actually serve them.
33:49
SPEAKER_00: Nice.
33:50
SPEAKER_00: Right.
33:50
SPEAKER_00: And I think that and from a leadership perspective as we look at our ministry we're we're doing ways to make sure that we don't turn away any individual who needs a service right now if we have it we'll get it.
34:00
SPEAKER_00: Now if we get we of course if there's documentation needs to be filed X, Y, and Z, we can push in the right direction, but if for simple things why shouldn't we to be able to do it?
34:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
34:07
SPEAKER_00: And I think that's the direction we're moving in but we're excited on what God is doing, right?
34:11
SPEAKER_00: Our bishop always smiles back in the day and he says I'm retired.
34:14
SPEAKER_00: He wants to sit in the back he has a great great grandbabies now and having fun.
34:18
SPEAKER_00: But watching him when he was on fire, the things he was doing for his community how he was you know pushing the envelope really challenging men challenging pastors back there.
34:28
SPEAKER_00: Remember back in the Jim Way and Capernaum and all that taking place.
34:31
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
34:32
SPEAKER_00: And seeing that I I think that not just in our ministry but back for our community we need that fire again.
34:38
SPEAKER_00: You know that that group of um individuals who come together and say you know what hey listen some things we're just not going to tolerate in God's name.
34:45
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
34:46
SPEAKER_00: And I think we miss that at times.
34:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
34:48
SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if it's a fear factor.
34:50
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if it's an economy factor.
34:51
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if it's um uh if it's just a mental issue in a sense uh where we say I don't think we can anymore but as long as we have him upstairs we can do whatever we choose to do.
35:01
SPEAKER_00: That's right.
35:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah yeah and I and I think that's what we're lacking.
35:04
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
35:05
SPEAKER_01: Good.
35:05
SPEAKER_01: I I first met Bishop Roscoe when I was pastoring in Babson Park and I would go to the Ministerial association here in Lake Wales and um I never met I hadn't met Daniel but I met him and uh I actually remember in grad school I went and interviewed him um for a project for a paper that I had.
35:22
SPEAKER_01: So um yeah I mean just a great guy and it must be really amazing to have labored all those years doing God's work being faithful and now you're kind of like you said sitting in the back of the room watching what's going on.
35:38
SPEAKER_01: I mean I know that's got to bring him immense joy to see that.
35:40
SPEAKER_01: Pastor Jack is the same way here you know he's been here 29 years and to be able to see what what God's doing now they both probably if you talk to them always thought that these things could happen but to be able to witness it and experience it and be able to um praise God for what he's done through that it's just powerful.
36:00
SPEAKER_01: I want to talk a little bit about the book.
36:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah let's do it the right ingredients.
36:04
SPEAKER_01: Yes um you outlined some of the concepts of of this idea in the book and I loved right off the bat the first thing that I thought was very important was how you talked about your wife.
36:15
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
36:16
SPEAKER_01: You said and I quote my wife has been a steady presence behind every chapter of my life when my confidence wavered hers did not and when the weight felt heavy she carried it with quiet strength.
36:27
SPEAKER_00: Yes tell me how you saw that happen out so in in in life in this marriage I realized that um as I was pursuing who I was trying to become back to her comment about me being having all this potential she sacrificed her career her her going to school and put everything on pause in a sense so I can hit play.
36:48
SPEAKER_00: And so during that process I realized that I was becoming this individual but I wanted to make sure that um I never left her behind and at times where I was as I was growing and everything else I look back and I I didn't want to never get to points where as I'm if I'm climbing the ladder I'm pulling her and dragging her.
37:03
SPEAKER_00: If I had to go up the ladder and just take a couple steps down to make sure she can jump on my shoulder and go up together that's the purpose of marriage.
37:09
SPEAKER_00: Nice.
37:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
37:10
SPEAKER_00: And I realized she would do the same for me.
37:12
SPEAKER_00: And so that's why I had to start off the book that way.
37:15
SPEAKER_00: Because without the her is no book right she's the emphasis in saying hey you need to go ahead and write that down.
37:21
SPEAKER_00: She's the person that said hey you can do this.
37:23
SPEAKER_00: Even in in some of the biggest career situations I remember one time the story um nobody really knows this except my wife now everybody's gonna know right so I was going through a situation get ready everybody I was going through a situation and man I was mensally fatigued I was destroyed I was emotionally hurt um I have a saying well I I had to call EMS right but not the EMS Emergical medical service as you know but my emotions my mind and my spirit okay right and so as I dialed in EMS and I'm talking to myself and going through my wife walks in in the room and she looks at me and she says every once in a while you need a good cry she walked out and closed the door and when she closed the door man the tears just started well falling from my eyes man I mean I was in there like a young baby again I was struggling and trying to figure out my my my way but in those tears I found my answer but it's all because she said every once in a while you need a good cry and that's why she's important to me that's why she's the best wife for me.
38:26
SPEAKER_00: Yeah right that's why she's the best mother for my children.
38:29
SPEAKER_00: And so that's why those words on paper aren't even enough of what she really is.
38:34
SPEAKER_01: You have daughters yes one okay one yeah my favorite daughter okay that's good I got two so I got they actually uh bought me a shirt for Christmas that said awesome like my daughters and it was supposed to be daughter because one saw the picture of it and ordered it and then the Lana bought one that said daughters and so one got annoyed that it that it included her sister but um but um I think it's amazing are are you talking with her about like how to be that kind of wife because there are a lot of wives that would go I I can't I I need to be the one that can be tearful if I need to I need him to be strong.
39:14
SPEAKER_01: And so how appropriate and how amazing that she gave you that freedom to be able to do that and to to be secure enough in that that okay he's not gonna fall apart.
39:25
SPEAKER_01: Actually I'm gonna close the door and he's gonna get with God and God's going to do something here even if there's tears even if I can hear him crying through the door I'm gonna let him do it because he's gonna walk out a better man.
39:37
SPEAKER_01: And to to be able to just come alongside your husband like that and do exactly what you need to do to support him and help him that's the God given role that God gave at wives.
39:49
SPEAKER_01: Yeah and and Lana is that way for me.
39:51
SPEAKER_01: You know when I um about a month ago I traveled out of state to speak at a men's conference and when I first called her to said you're not gonna believe this I got this call these people want me to come they want me to come and speak and she's like oh you've got to do it you got to go I can't go because that's like our our daughter's getting ready to have a baby anytime.
40:11
SPEAKER_01: And so I feel like I need to be here not out of state.
40:14
SPEAKER_01: I'm like yeah I understand but she's like I want you to go and I want you to enjoy it and I want you to to do well and I'm gonna keep things um going on the home front here.
40:23
SPEAKER_01: And um you know she has her own career and she has been recognized.
40:27
SPEAKER_01: She was teacher of the year twice.
40:28
SPEAKER_01: Amazing I you know I think uh I would have given it to her more than twice but I I'm biased um last year you know their area did really well with their testing and they got recognized for that and I see the the hard work that she puts in for that right and and so that that helps me to support what she's doing.
40:48
SPEAKER_01: But I also know that she is right there beside me.
40:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
40:51
SPEAKER_01: And like you talked about that I wouldn't want it any other way.
40:54
SPEAKER_01: No way brother just the only way and um I I uh I tell my sons this I've got four of them um the one of them is getting married next week to Pastor Jack's daughter so yeah we're so we're gonna be family I don't know how he feels about that but no they're they're really excited and so are we um so he's marrying her and um I got two more that are already married and one is probably doing that next year.
41:20
SPEAKER_01: And so I want these guys to know how they can be this this kind of man.
41:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah right and so that's why this show is important with these episodes with guests like yourself to talk about what a real man is a man of God um a man that that serves a man that that lives it out a man that's a good steward that has integrity all of those things.
41:43
SPEAKER_01: So I I love that about that.
41:45
SPEAKER_01: You also talked in the book about leadership without a framework is like walking into a grocery store without a list.
41:52
SPEAKER_01: And we have all done that and it never turns out well right we spend way too much money and we buy way too much junk that we don't need.
41:59
SPEAKER_01: That's when I get home and there's we've bought a jar of sour cream and there's three more in the fridge or you know it's things like that.
42:06
SPEAKER_01: So you don't pay attention to what you have but you you titled this framework Thankful and it's an acronym tell me about where that the meaning of that came from how did you first come upon that and develop that and what are you trying to to say to people when you talk about that so it's really amazing you asked me that question and the reason why is because I'm not sure about you but in ministry when I first started feeling I was being called I always wrote notes in my phone so my phone is filled with sermon titles.
42:36
SPEAKER_00: It's filled with notes um outlines and everything between and so literally this quote unquote book the chapters I've had for years I've always said once I said while I wrote a book one day this would be a chapter.
42:48
SPEAKER_00: This would be a chapter but I didn't have the title and so as I was sitting there writing the chapters and I was I said it's time to write this book and I was going through um you know the grieving process of my mother just passing and trying to understand everything else I literally sat there on a knee and I said Lord I'm just thankful there it was there it is there it was and so in our church you know we we use a lot of acronyms right we use a lot of acronyms and when I said thankful I said I really am thankful so now let's put some wheat meat behind this.
43:20
SPEAKER_00: And so that's where the whole thankful method comes from okay with loyalty being last intentionally because many times I see individuals um in a leadership aspect and many times they uh I've seen leaders say you need to be loyal to me you need to be loyal to me you want loyalty but you haven't even done anything for me yeah I call that credibility you you you you you can't take loyal I remember I had a supervisor at one point in time years ago uh this individual um uh started started to work and she met with all the the leadership team and uh they were typing away and literally closed the laptop and said I have one question for me one question for you I said what's that can you be loyal to me I said yeah But in my mind, I'm saying I don't even know you.
44:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:02
SPEAKER_00: You have even showed your leadership.
44:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:04
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you know, uh we can get there.
44:06
SPEAKER_00: We can get there.
44:07
SPEAKER_00: Uh in my thing is at the end of the day, I always reverence the position, even if I didn't like the person.
44:13
SPEAKER_00: Right?
44:13
SPEAKER_00: Because I just believe that's how it needs to be done.
44:16
SPEAKER_00: And so I had to make sure that in this book people understood that no, you have to be transparent, humble, adaptable, right?
44:24
SPEAKER_00: A nurturer, thankful, a kneeler, and everything.
44:26
SPEAKER_00: And then loyalty has to come last.
44:28
SPEAKER_00: Because if you do everything first, loyalty becomes easy.
44:31
SPEAKER_00: Right.
44:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, 100%.
44:33
SPEAKER_01: And that was the purpose of that.
44:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:35
SPEAKER_01: I I call it, like I said, I'll call that credibility.
44:37
SPEAKER_01: It's the same thing, you know, years or years ago when I was a new pastor, and I mean I've been there maybe a year, right?
44:44
SPEAKER_01: I'm 28.
44:45
SPEAKER_01: I have no ministry experience at all.
44:48
SPEAKER_01: And I've replaced, I've been called to this little church in Columbus, Ohio, and I've replaced this guy who had been there 19 years.
44:57
SPEAKER_01: Many of the people there had gotten saved under his ministry.
44:59
SPEAKER_01: Powerful man of God, right?
45:01
SPEAKER_01: Um, and then he goes to bed one night at age 53 and just doesn't wake up.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: And they're devastated.
45:08
SPEAKER_01: And so then the the denomination takes them through six months of grief counseling, and then they're like, okay, you're ready for a pastor.
45:14
SPEAKER_01: And bless their hearts, they got me.
45:17
SPEAKER_01: So um they were great to me.
45:19
SPEAKER_01: They allowed me to make some mistakes.
45:20
SPEAKER_01: There were people there that kind of tried to help me in that area.
45:24
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I don't know that they knew how to do that or what to do there.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: But I remember being in a meeting one night, and um, I'm saying something, and I don't even remember what it was, but um I I said, you're just gonna have to trust me because I'm your pastor.
45:41
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
45:42
SPEAKER_01: And I I think they want to, like you, you know, they they were they wanted to do that, but we didn't have 19 years of building that up.
45:50
SPEAKER_01: I've been here 16 years, you know, and um Pastor Jack and Pastor Bonnie have poured into me and um given me an opportunity here, and and there is a relationship of trust that's been built up over time.
46:04
SPEAKER_01: They know without a doubt that what I'm gonna do, and vice versa.
46:08
SPEAKER_01: And so that loyalty has has been easy.
46:11
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and um, so you know that's part of it.
46:14
SPEAKER_01: Um what when you look at the acronyms, so transparency, honesty, uh, walk me through the rest of them.
46:23
SPEAKER_00: So you have you have transparency, you have them humble, humble, um, adaptable, you'll be a nurturer, a kneeler.
46:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I liked that.
46:33
SPEAKER_01: I was hoping that meant prayer when I was.
46:35
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, that's exactly what it is.
46:36
SPEAKER_00: Because the situations you gotta pray about.
46:38
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, for sure.
46:39
SPEAKER_00: I I tell my leadership team now, I said, listen, you go pray about it.
46:42
SPEAKER_00: Right?
46:43
SPEAKER_00: You you and I and I know um the the if there's a pressing situation that I know is gonna affect the entire team, the university, your students.
46:50
SPEAKER_00: No, you gotta pray about this.
46:52
SPEAKER_00: Because I need to make sure that he's in a line with me.
46:54
SPEAKER_00: And I knew when my words uh come out, you understand that it's been prayed for, it's been understood.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: Then after that, you gotta be a unifier.
47:03
SPEAKER_00: Right?
47:03
SPEAKER_00: You have to be a unifier, you have to be able to bring people together, right?
47:07
SPEAKER_00: Under understand that whole process.
47:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, and of course, there's the loyalty aspect.
47:11
SPEAKER_00: And when you look at everything in between, that is thankful.
47:13
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
47:15
SPEAKER_01: Very good.
47:15
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
47:16
SPEAKER_01: Um, you you talk about, and I said honestly, I was thinking like transparency.
47:21
SPEAKER_01: So one of those that's one that's the first one.
47:24
SPEAKER_01: I I have guys that I talk with, and I want to come back to in a minute about the kneeler, because you talk about even your team at your job, when there's a pressing issue, you ask them to pray about it.
47:36
SPEAKER_01: So I want to I want to let's just talk about that now and then we'll come back.
47:39
SPEAKER_01: Um, how do you because you work in a secular environment?
47:43
SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
47:44
SPEAKER_01: Tell me how you navigate that.
47:46
SPEAKER_00: So you've asked a great question just then, right?
47:49
SPEAKER_00: And I think what happens is you like to your light.
47:52
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
47:52
SPEAKER_00: If you who you say you are, then what happens is people expect you to pray.
47:57
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
47:58
SPEAKER_00: People expect you to say, hey, that's good.
48:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, I I I need you right now.
48:03
SPEAKER_00: They're gonna call upon you to find the right solution, right?
48:07
SPEAKER_00: Um, because sometimes you don't have to walk around and say, I'm a preacher, I'm a preacher, I'm a minister, I'm a minister.
48:11
SPEAKER_00: No, your work should speak for itself.
48:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, a lot of times that's the worst thing.
48:13
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
48:14
SPEAKER_00: When I start hearing people like that, I run from them, right?
48:16
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you don't have to announce yourself.
48:18
SPEAKER_00: Your light will just illuminate.
48:19
SPEAKER_00: We should connect.
48:20
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna say, Oh, yeah, I feel the light.
48:22
SPEAKER_00: I can I can see it in you, I can hear it in your voice.
48:23
SPEAKER_00: I can, there's certain things about you that you're doing that we connected, right?
48:27
SPEAKER_00: We're we're spiritual brothers.
48:28
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
48:28
SPEAKER_00: Um, and so in doing so, um, I've gone and had great leaders, especially now, where they know.
48:34
SPEAKER_00: And even so, in fact, when it first started off, when I became on my team two years ago because they didn't know me, it was just time to eat.
48:40
SPEAKER_00: And one thing about me is um I kind of flipped the mindset, I'd never like to be served first, I always want to eat last.
48:46
SPEAKER_00: And right before we eat, I said, Hey team, I know that um you don't have to pray.
48:49
SPEAKER_00: Nobody in here has to pray, but I'm gonna bless the food.
48:52
SPEAKER_00: You don't have to out your head, you don't have to do anything you want to do, but I'm gonna do it anyway.
48:55
SPEAKER_00: After I've done it so many times, it becomes a habit.
48:59
SPEAKER_00: And the team says, Are you gonna pray?
49:02
SPEAKER_00: They ask, they expect it, they want it, right?
49:05
SPEAKER_00: Because now it's it's become a culture that's been established in the institution of leadership that you say, this team right here, there's something spiritual about this group here.
49:12
SPEAKER_00: This team right here, you can see their God fear, and this team right here, they have a light.
49:16
SPEAKER_00: There's something about that, it's abundance that's taking place over here, and so it just spreads, it becomes contagious.
49:21
SPEAKER_00: I say, Do you want to be a contact contagious Christian, right?
49:24
SPEAKER_00: I want to be able to see to see something to touch it and say, Yeah, I got the cooties.
49:27
SPEAKER_00: I want the spiritual cooties, right?
49:28
SPEAKER_00: I want all that good stuff that's in there.
49:30
SPEAKER_00: And so that's what I believe.
49:32
SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay.
49:33
SPEAKER_01: And so obviously, we've got people listening that are working in in secular environments, and that's my term.
49:39
SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, in other words, you're not in a church setting or a Christian school or any of those things, and it might be difficult to do that.
49:47
SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, we we both have wives that that work at a public high school.
49:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
49:52
SPEAKER_01: But I'll bet you without a doubt that she prays just as much as my wife does.
49:56
SPEAKER_01: And and um that's a ministry that God sends them to every week, every day.
50:01
SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, they might not be able to stand up in their classrooms and say, okay, everybody, turn to John chapter 13.
50:08
SPEAKER_01: But I love what you're saying about that you people ex see that and they expect that because they they that's who you are.
50:15
SPEAKER_01: And if but if that's not who you are, then you're gonna struggle.
50:19
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
50:19
SPEAKER_01: And um you you're not forcing it on anybody like you said to your team, you don't have to pray.
50:25
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to.
50:26
SPEAKER_01: And if if you're well, if you want to, you're welcome to do that.
50:29
SPEAKER_01: And now it's become this expectation.
50:32
SPEAKER_01: And um, because of that, because of how you profess to be a Christian, they're watching, are you living that out?
50:39
SPEAKER_01: All the time.
50:40
SPEAKER_01: And um, I I love that.
50:41
SPEAKER_01: And so I I think just talk to somebody today who who is in that scenario that they don't have they're not in a leadership role.
50:51
SPEAKER_01: They're those people sitting there and they want to say, Hey, can we pray for this meal?
50:55
SPEAKER_01: Or can we really stop and pray about this decision?
50:58
SPEAKER_01: It's gonna impact this organization in a mighty way.
51:01
SPEAKER_01: If we choose wrong, it could really hurt us.
51:04
SPEAKER_01: So can we pray about that?
51:05
SPEAKER_01: How do you encourage someone in that area that's not in a leadership role but wants to live out their faith?
51:12
SPEAKER_01: What advice would you give them?
51:14
SPEAKER_00: The the first step is real simple.
51:16
SPEAKER_00: Um, you pray by yourself.
51:18
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
51:19
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
51:19
SPEAKER_00: So so let's say, for instance, we're about to all have a uh lunch together and everybody's uh we're having lunch or we're in a cafeteria or wherever it may be in the break room, and right before you eat, you just start praying to yourself.
51:31
SPEAKER_00: People pay attention to that.
51:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
51:32
SPEAKER_00: There's somebody else who wanted to pray, but they were kind of nervous and scared or discouraged because they didn't want to be seen as, oh, I'm this holy holier than holy person.
51:40
SPEAKER_00: No, no, that's just who you are.
51:42
SPEAKER_00: We can't reject who he is.
51:44
SPEAKER_00: And so now what happens is you start consistently praying.
51:46
SPEAKER_00: Next thing you know, the person next to you says, Hey, let me stop my conversation at praying.
51:49
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
51:50
unknown: Right?
51:50
SPEAKER_00: I've seen it.
51:51
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because now what happens is they're gonna reverence your prayer.
51:54
SPEAKER_00: They understand that you know what, I don't want to disrespect you.
51:56
SPEAKER_00: I don't want to go ahead and put you in a situation where you feel like I'm not living up to your standard as well.
52:00
SPEAKER_00: And now what happens is two people start praying.
52:02
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, then three people start praying, and then it just starts that that that pebble becomes a boulder.
52:08
SPEAKER_00: And so it starts with you.
52:09
SPEAKER_00: You you're sitting there right now thinking to yourself, you know what, this job has been too tough, dude, too tough.
52:14
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
52:15
SPEAKER_00: The the the the stress at this job currently, I don't know what to do.
52:18
SPEAKER_00: What stops you from sitting at your desk for two to three minutes and getting praying?
52:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, or if you're a faster, for instance, I I I I fa I I used to fast every Wednesday faithfully, and to the point where my team knew, oh, you know, Dr.
52:33
SPEAKER_00: O's, be fast someday.
52:35
SPEAKER_00: It just spreads.
52:36
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you don't have to say anything about it, they just know.
52:38
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, you don't have to announce it, you know, and and uh all that.
52:42
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I've seen that, especially when I worked in those areas in the nonprofit world, you know, there were people on that I worked with, coworkers, et cetera, who were diametrically opposed to my faith.
52:54
SPEAKER_01: I mean, they, you know, they were outspoken about it, they didn't want to hear it, they didn't want to see it, they didn't want to do any of that.
53:02
SPEAKER_01: And I just tried to always be real.
53:04
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
53:05
SPEAKER_01: Um, I didn't have to come in, you know, with an announcement of, you know, everyone turned in your Bibles to uh I just live it out and you just try to listen to people.
53:17
SPEAKER_01: And and um, you know, I'm thankful that in those roles I was in situations and and job responsibilities where people were coming to me for help.
53:27
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
53:27
SPEAKER_01: And it's one of the things I loved about those jobs.
53:30
SPEAKER_01: Um, I was helping people find jobs and then go to school if they couldn't, or you know, advocating for kids in foster care who had been through some significant trauma, things like that.
53:41
SPEAKER_01: And I I loved what being able to do that.
53:43
SPEAKER_01: And I say all the time that God gave me more ministry opportunities there than I had when I was pastoring in years before.
53:51
SPEAKER_01: That's major.
53:52
SPEAKER_01: And I I never like counted it up, you know, but I I would have people, there's a guy, you know, a guy's like 19 years in a company and he's been laid off and he doesn't know how he's gonna continue at the current lifestyle, and he's sitting at my desk.
54:06
SPEAKER_01: And so what I say is, you know what, let me like Pastor Daniel, let me share my story with you.
54:11
SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm working here because I couldn't find a, you know, I couldn't find a job, went to a job fair.
54:17
SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm working in this foster care setting because I had to go through and try to learn how to advocate for one of my own children years ago, things like that.
54:26
SPEAKER_01: So when you start to share your story, it kind of breaks down those barriers a little bit, right?
54:30
SPEAKER_01: Agreed.
54:31
SPEAKER_01: And um, so that so being real and being willing to share your story and and not pushing that on people, but just living that out, being who you are.
54:42
SPEAKER_01: Um, I think that that that's really helpful.
54:44
SPEAKER_01: So I appreciate that.
54:45
SPEAKER_01: That I wanted to to talk about that.
54:47
SPEAKER_01: Definitely okay.
54:48
SPEAKER_01: So I want to go to the transparency part.
54:50
SPEAKER_01: That's the first letter in the acronym.
54:53
SPEAKER_01: Um, you talked about this, and um we we've talked about this already with some of the connections we make with men in church, and that's the whole goal of this podcast is to help men become disciples of Jesus.
55:06
SPEAKER_01: That's why it's called Miking Disciples, it's why we do this.
55:09
SPEAKER_01: And um one guy that I know says that we need to find a squad of men, and I loved that term when I heard that.
55:16
SPEAKER_01: Guysha shoddy is the guy's name.
55:18
SPEAKER_01: And um I I've got guys, so I've got two men especially that I meet with just about every Wednesday morning.
55:26
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
55:26
SPEAKER_01: Um, I was afraid to go there today.
55:28
SPEAKER_01: I had to be at Chapel, but he also has had his building ran into three times, Scott Thompson.
55:33
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
55:34
SPEAKER_01: So uh we meet there in that building.
55:36
SPEAKER_01: I'll be scared of that too.
55:37
SPEAKER_01: He's moving out, but um, but he's one of my guys, and I've met with him as often as I can since, and I'm not kidding, 2008.
55:45
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
55:46
SPEAKER_01: I was at a dire point in my life then, and I reached out to him and said, I need somebody to talk to.
55:51
SPEAKER_01: Can I come by and see you?
55:53
SPEAKER_01: And he said, Yeah, brother, come on by.
55:55
SPEAKER_01: And we've been doing that ever since.
55:56
SPEAKER_01: And now there's another guy that's in there with us, and he actually moved out of this area.
56:01
SPEAKER_01: He's pastoring a church in Indiana, but he joins us by FaceTime.
56:05
SPEAKER_01: And what I love, that's my squad.
56:07
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, these guys, I can go into that room or FaceTime with Brian.
56:11
SPEAKER_01: He's the other guy, and I can say anything I need to say.
56:15
SPEAKER_01: These guys know everything about me.
56:17
SPEAKER_01: I know everything about them, and we love each other anyway.
56:20
SPEAKER_01: And we just show up, hey, what's going on in your life?
56:23
SPEAKER_01: And we don't have a set of questions, we don't, you know, it's not a Bible study.
56:28
SPEAKER_01: It's just what's going on.
56:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:30
SPEAKER_01: And there have been times where I have shared things that I've been frustrated about.
56:35
SPEAKER_01: There have been times where I had big question marks in my life.
56:38
SPEAKER_01: What do I do about this?
56:40
SPEAKER_01: And these guys were the sounding board for me.
56:43
SPEAKER_01: And um, I think you you probably have men like that in your life, right?
56:47
SPEAKER_01: Who are those guys for you?
56:48
SPEAKER_00: So my squad is is interesting, right?
56:51
SPEAKER_00: Because um Proverbs 28, 28 and 17 talks about iron sharpening iron.
56:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
56:56
SPEAKER_00: Right.
56:56
SPEAKER_00: So I made sure that my squad, in a sense, is something that can sharpen me.
57:01
SPEAKER_00: The first part of the squad that you look for is a squad members that can hold you accountable, who can grab you by the shirt if you need to and jack you up and say, hey, that this ain't you.
57:10
SPEAKER_00: Right.
57:10
SPEAKER_00: You know, you know we're not playing these games.
57:11
SPEAKER_00: You're better than this, right?
57:12
SPEAKER_00: So you need accountability partners.
57:14
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
57:14
SPEAKER_00: The the second part of my squad, uh, we have a saying that um you have to have a covenant with your eyes.
57:20
SPEAKER_00: Right?
57:20
SPEAKER_00: So we we look at that.
57:21
SPEAKER_00: And so um so three members of my squad is real simple.
57:24
SPEAKER_00: My father is the first member of my squad.
57:27
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
57:27
SPEAKER_00: Um, because um he's the one that has my DNA.
57:30
SPEAKER_00: He has my physical DNA, he's poured everything into me, and now he's a person that you know what?
57:34
SPEAKER_00: He can say, hey son, this ain't where I raised.
57:37
SPEAKER_00: You know better than this.
57:38
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
57:38
SPEAKER_00: Stop playing with me.
57:39
SPEAKER_01: Right, it's amazing that your dad is in that role.
57:42
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
57:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we in fact, even in he's in Nigeria and we speak on uh uh uh uh what's the app and signal and have conversations, right, to make sure that uh he's always calling.
57:52
SPEAKER_00: And in fact, my mom was the one that called me every day.
57:54
SPEAKER_00: After my mama passed away, he's the one that calls me every day.
57:57
SPEAKER_00: It's like he automatically filled in the gap immediately.
57:59
SPEAKER_00: Um, and so he is, you know, uh the the man in my life that I've always looked up to.
58:04
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
58:04
SPEAKER_00: This the second member of my squad is uh Pastor Daniel Williams.
58:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, right, because he was an individual who uh helped me stay here.
58:12
SPEAKER_00: I found my wife, I found my family, found everything through him.
58:15
SPEAKER_00: And if you don't know Daniel Williams, he's as real as it gets.
58:17
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
58:17
SPEAKER_00: He's not gonna sugarcoat nothing, you talk about transparency, he's gonna give it to you.
58:20
SPEAKER_00: We say blood raw.
58:22
SPEAKER_00: You're gonna get it honest, you're gonna get it how however he needs to give it to you, and um, he's not afraid to have that crucial, we don't even say crucial, we say courageous conversation with you.
58:31
SPEAKER_00: Okay, and then the third member of my squad is uh a man who's a pastor of New Bethel in Tampa, but also too, he was a senior vice president at Post A College.
58:39
SPEAKER_00: Um he has about a six or seven hundred member church.
58:42
SPEAKER_00: Um, and he is uh Reggie Webb, uh sharp man, sharp man because each one of those men had something that I longed for.
58:51
SPEAKER_00: I needed something in my dad to make sure I was good as just as good as a dad as he was for me.
58:56
SPEAKER_00: I needed something in um uh Minister Daniel Pastor D to make sure I had the biblical principles and uh the fire for God that he had.
59:03
SPEAKER_00: And I needed to make sure that I understood how to treat people, how to make sure that I understand how the how ministry and education works in Reggie Webb.
59:11
SPEAKER_00: And so those three people, those three unique, distinct things helped me shape who I am today.
59:16
SPEAKER_00: Right?
59:17
SPEAKER_00: My squad had to change because back then I had a squad that we were all around the same, there was really nobody moving up, and I and I realized that just the the my the where I'm at in life, I need individuals who can pour into me and I can achieve something that I've always sought after.
59:30
SPEAKER_00: So we have a saying now just because you planted the seed doesn't mean you get to harvest.
59:34
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
59:35
SPEAKER_00: And so right now I'm I'm harvesting a lot of seeds.
59:38
SPEAKER_00: Do I know if I get to see the harvest?
59:39
SPEAKER_00: I don't know, but whoever will, it'll be fruitful.
59:42
SPEAKER_00: And so that is my squad, right?
59:44
SPEAKER_00: That is my group, and I pray that what happens is my my I have four kids, one girl, three boys, is that um I do such a decent job as a father that my children allow me to be in their squad.
59:56
SPEAKER_01: Man, oh that is so powerful, right?
59:59
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I I pray that um they say, you know what, um, a squad doesn't exist without their daddy, right?
1:00:07
SPEAKER_00: Uh they uh I I tell my son all the time, I say, Who's your best friend he says you are?
1:00:11
SPEAKER_00: I tell my kids they're my best friends now.
1:00:13
SPEAKER_00: My family from top to bottom, my wife, that's my best friends.
1:00:16
SPEAKER_00: So I don't deem my squad my best friends, it's just my squad, my best friends, and my family.
1:00:21
SPEAKER_00: And that really, really changed my perspective.
1:00:23
SPEAKER_00: And I told myself, I was telling another man, this is your merit as a man, especially a Christian, a Christian man.
1:00:29
SPEAKER_00: If your children are in a situation and they need they need somebody to pray for them and they don't call you first, you're doing something wrong.
1:00:39
SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah.
1:00:41
SPEAKER_01: That is really um powerful.
1:00:45
SPEAKER_01: It also can be convicting, right?
1:00:47
SPEAKER_01: Um when you talk about earlier you mentioned living out your faith.
1:00:52
SPEAKER_01: Uh if you're doing that in that way and it's authentic and it's real and it's genuine, to have your sons want to be around you because of that.
1:01:00
SPEAKER_01: That that that's that legacy that continues, you know.
1:01:03
SPEAKER_01: And I just was sitting with my sons the other night, Monday night, because we we try to get together every year around the anniversary of their mom's death.
1:01:11
SPEAKER_01: It's just something we've done.
1:01:13
SPEAKER_01: Um, for the last three years, my one of my sons lived out of the area, but now he's back.
1:01:18
SPEAKER_01: And so this was exciting.
1:01:20
SPEAKER_01: And we um we sat down at a table together and just laughed and joked.
1:01:25
SPEAKER_01: And you know, I don't I don't use that time to talk about, okay, look, let's get real serious here.
1:01:32
SPEAKER_01: It's just me being there with them, you know.
1:01:35
SPEAKER_01: And they wanted me, they they raked me into this.
1:01:40
SPEAKER_01: They um are doing fantasy basketball, NBA.
1:01:44
SPEAKER_01: Okay, and I love the magic, always have.
1:01:47
SPEAKER_01: Uh my son and I went to a playoff game there last year.
1:01:50
SPEAKER_01: He's a Pistons fan, so it was great.
1:01:52
SPEAKER_01: We beat him.
1:01:53
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I don't really watch it day in and day out.
1:01:56
SPEAKER_01: I'm more of a college guy, but they're all into it, you know.
1:01:59
SPEAKER_01: And they're like, he he calls me and he's like, I need you to do this for me.
1:02:03
SPEAKER_01: I need you to get in this draft with with me and and my brothers.
1:02:07
SPEAKER_01: And I just went, I told my wife, I'm like, I don't really want to do this, you know.
1:02:12
SPEAKER_01: But they're asking me to do it.
1:02:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I would be an idiot to for my son to say, I want you to do this with us.
1:02:18
SPEAKER_01: I see where you're going already.
1:02:19
SPEAKER_01: And me go, uh, no thanks.
1:02:22
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:02:22
SPEAKER_01: No, this is like you don't get that opportunity all the time where your adult sons go, come hang out with us.
1:02:30
SPEAKER_01: That's it.
1:02:30
SPEAKER_01: So we're sitting at the table and um going through the first rounds of the draft.
1:02:34
SPEAKER_01: And I don't know if I've got a good team or not.
1:02:36
SPEAKER_01: Who knows?
1:02:37
SPEAKER_01: I probably don't, but um the you know, so you have four hours to draft your people, but they're trying to like move through all these rounds, you know.
1:02:45
SPEAKER_01: There's like 20 rounds or something, it's ridiculous.
1:02:48
SPEAKER_01: And uh, I can't tell you how many times over the past several days I've gotten a text from one of them hey dad, you got two minutes left to make your pick, four hours, you know, and so I'm hurrying up and making a pick and um stuff like that.
1:03:02
SPEAKER_01: But I think it's just the fact that they want to be in my life, and so they've all moved out of the house, but they all live in the same neighborhood with us, which is great.
1:03:12
SPEAKER_01: Like I get to live near them, but not have them in my house.
1:03:14
SPEAKER_01: And and you know, we'll have family meals and we got a table that seats 10 people and it's too small already.
1:03:21
SPEAKER_01: And just, you know, I I love what God is doing there, but it's because you have to be intentional with your sons and your daughters, because guess what?
1:03:30
SPEAKER_01: You want her to do you want her to marry a guy like you?
1:03:33
SPEAKER_01: I I do, yeah, right.
1:03:34
SPEAKER_01: I got one that's married already, she just had our first grandchild a month ago.
1:03:38
SPEAKER_01: Uh love you, Hallie, you're a favorite because of that.
1:03:41
SPEAKER_01: Um first of many grandchildren, probably, but and Collins is 15, you know.
1:03:47
SPEAKER_01: But someday she's gonna meet a guy, yeah.
1:03:49
SPEAKER_01: And I want him to be a godly man, absolutely, and I want her to want that because she's seen that in me.
1:03:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so you said something powerful.
1:03:57
SPEAKER_00: So my daughter and I have a conversation.
1:03:59
SPEAKER_00: I even talked about it in the book.
1:04:00
SPEAKER_00: And so since she's been born, she's my only daughter, my favorite daughter.
1:04:03
SPEAKER_00: I always say it all the time, right?
1:04:05
SPEAKER_00: Um, but I realized because I have four sisters, I wanted to set a stage for my daughter that she had an expectation, she had anticipation, but she knew her value.
1:04:15
SPEAKER_00: And so I started off with something real small.
1:04:16
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's good.
1:04:17
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right?
1:04:18
SPEAKER_00: Such as a car door.
1:04:20
SPEAKER_00: So since she's been two, I've always opened a car door for her.
1:04:23
SPEAKER_00: My son's always opened a car door for her.
1:04:25
SPEAKER_00: She won't even get out of the car without somebody opening the door.
1:04:28
SPEAKER_00: If it's a man around or a boy around, she'll stand right there automatically because it's almost, it's almost she's been crafted just for this moment, right?
1:04:36
SPEAKER_00: The door being opened.
1:04:36
SPEAKER_00: And I and I have a saying, I said, what I hope happens is that the day um she's a freshman now, but when she goes to prom one day, whoever this is comes to our house, knocks on the door, says, Hey, I'm gonna take your daughter to prom.
1:04:52
SPEAKER_00: They step outside.
1:04:53
SPEAKER_00: 30 seconds later, the doorbell's gonna ring.
1:04:55
SPEAKER_00: I'm opening the door, I'm gonna say, What's wrong?
1:04:57
SPEAKER_00: She's gonna say, Dad, he didn't open the door for me, can you take me?
1:05:01
SPEAKER_00: Because she knows she's worth more than a car door.
1:05:03
SPEAKER_01: Okay, right?
1:05:04
SPEAKER_00: The value.
1:05:05
SPEAKER_00: And so until you find out your value, and it took me a while, and I talk about it in the book, and I said, I remember when I was uh 17 years old working at Disney, and I was a cook back then.
1:05:15
SPEAKER_00: And I remember as a cook, and I remember we get paid every week over there, and I was back there, this huge long receipt came.
1:05:22
SPEAKER_00: I mean, massive receipt.
1:05:23
SPEAKER_00: And we're I'm I'm dropping the fries, I'm doing the chicken baskets.
1:05:27
SPEAKER_00: I told this story in the book.
1:05:28
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'm I'm go I'm doing it, I'm doing it, I'm I'm taking care of business, right?
1:05:31
SPEAKER_00: I'm dropping everything else, and all of a sudden uh we put four or five trays and put everything together and we push it out, and the whole kitchen was running crazy.
1:05:38
SPEAKER_00: We're all going crazy, right?
1:05:40
SPEAKER_00: And but I never paid attention to any prices at Disney.
1:05:43
SPEAKER_00: And so finally I decided to look at his receipt because it was so long.
1:05:46
SPEAKER_00: So I looked at the receipt, and as I looked at the receipt, I realized that a chicken basket was roughly uh like$9.99.
1:05:54
SPEAKER_00: And I known as that point in time I was only making$7.50.
1:05:58
SPEAKER_00: In my mind, I realized that I Wasn't even I had no value.
1:06:01
SPEAKER_00: Three pieces of chicken strips, a handful of fries and some salt cost more than me.
1:06:07
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:06:07
SPEAKER_00: And that changed my perspective on value.
1:06:11
SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm getting ready, so I'm preaching here this weekend, and we've been working through the Sermon on the Mount this summer.
1:06:16
SPEAKER_01: And so I'm uh speaking on the passage of do not worry, where Jesus says, Are you not much more valuable than they?
1:06:24
SPEAKER_01: And I'm reading this the other day, and I'm just, you know, praying and studying and thinking about what to say.
1:06:29
SPEAKER_01: And I got captivated by that whole thought process of that your heavenly father sees you and knows exactly what you need and all these powerful things.
1:06:39
SPEAKER_01: And when you think about God as the creator and sustainer and preserver and provider, and when he invites us into this relationship, into his kingdom, yeah, um, as one of his children, all of the benefits that that are going to come.
1:06:53
SPEAKER_01: And the reason that your daughter knows her value is because her father has taught that.
1:07:00
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
1:07:00
SPEAKER_01: And that's what Jesus is getting at there.
1:07:02
SPEAKER_01: And so I I think that I would love to say to men that are listening, and even women that are listening and trying to get their husbands to listen or become the kind of men that would want to be like that, I hope that they realize where it starts.
1:07:16
SPEAKER_01: That it starts with a heavenly father and each of us submitting to him and following him out over the course of our life, and that we just fall more in love with him, we follow him no matter where he sends us, tells us what to do, we trust him.
1:07:32
SPEAKER_01: There's loyalty, right?
1:07:34
SPEAKER_01: Because of who he is and how amazing he is and how much he loves us.
1:07:38
SPEAKER_01: And so I just think that that's powerful.
1:07:40
SPEAKER_01: And when you talk about years from now, when you go home to be with the Lord, and your kids are maybe sitting here talking about who their dad was, they tell these stories about that.
1:07:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, about the ways that you poured value into them and showed them who they were and how important they were to you.
1:07:58
SPEAKER_01: And so I I love the the example that you're setting.
1:08:02
SPEAKER_01: I love what you and your wife are doing.
1:08:04
SPEAKER_01: I love what God is doing through you out in the community and in the church.
1:08:09
SPEAKER_01: And I just uh appreciate the friendship we have and and the the brother that you are.
1:08:14
SPEAKER_01: I appreciate your brother um the work that you're doing.
1:08:16
SPEAKER_01: And so I thanks so much for coming on today.
1:08:19
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for having me.
1:08:20
SPEAKER_01: And uh one more question where can people get a copy of the book?
1:08:23
SPEAKER_00: Amazon uh.com, the right ingredients.
1:08:25
SPEAKER_00: Uh feel free.
1:08:26
SPEAKER_00: Walmart, books a million.
1:08:28
SPEAKER_00: Okay, we're we're everywhere.
1:08:29
SPEAKER_00: So feel free to grab a copy.
1:08:30
SPEAKER_00: Um, I hope if you do get it, you enjoy it, read, and it's really to make sure you have the right ingredients.
1:08:35
SPEAKER_01: Okay, yeah, I love it.
1:08:36
SPEAKER_01: And that all starts with being thankful.
1:08:38
SPEAKER_00: Yes, sir.
1:08:39
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there you go.
1:08:40
SPEAKER_01: Hey, thanks so much for coming on.
1:08:42
SPEAKER_01: It's been a privilege to have you.
1:08:43
SPEAKER_01: I love you.
1:08:44
SPEAKER_01: Love you too.
1:08:44
SPEAKER_01: Keep doing what you're doing for the Lord, okay?
1:08:46
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
1:08:47
SPEAKER_01: Well, guys, that's all the time we have for now.
1:08:49
SPEAKER_01: Thanks so much for joining us today for another episode of Miking Disciples.
1:08:53
SPEAKER_01: If you have any questions for me or Dr.
1:08:55
SPEAKER_01: Andy, I want you to reach out to us.
1:08:57
SPEAKER_01: You can find the link in the show bio.
1:08:59
SPEAKER_01: We we would love to hear from you.
1:09:01
SPEAKER_01: Any comments or questions?
1:09:02
SPEAKER_01: If you're looking for the book that he's written and that we've referenced many times, you can find that there also.
1:09:08
SPEAKER_01: So I just appreciate you coming to join us, and we'll talk to you later when we get together again to try to help every man become a disciple of Jesus.
1:09:16
SPEAKER_01: Thanks so much.
1:09:21
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for joining us today for this latest episode of Miking Disciples.
1:09:25
SPEAKER_01: If you have any comments or questions, I would love to get for you to go to the comments or questions link that's found in the description of the episode.
1:09:32
SPEAKER_01: And I really would love to hear your thoughts.
1:09:34
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for joining us today.
1:09:35
SPEAKER_01: We'll talk to you later.