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Why You should not warn the narcissists new supply · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on? Beautiful folks, beautiful
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  people, beautiful people. Today we talk about the
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  narcissist and the narcissist new supply and why you should
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  not waste your time warning them.
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  If you're new here, I'm Lee Hammock, I'm a diagnosed
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  narcissist and welcome to season 2 of the Narcissist Code.
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  Let's get it. So bam, welcome back folks.
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  Welcome back, welcome back. So yes, I just left the gym.
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  I got to bear with me. I had to get this video done and
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  shot so I can get it up in time. I got I got to get better with
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  my shooting schedule because I think that's affecting my my
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  channel for real, because I'll be uploading videos
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  sporadically, different times of the day and it's affecting me in
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  a negative way. So here we go.
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  I'm reacting, I'm reacting, I'm putting them up, trying to put
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  them up at the same time every single day.
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  Hopefully this works out. I'm trying it for the next week,
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  but thank you for being here. Y'all new supply and like I
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  said, if y'all new here, I'm redoing my old videos from four
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  or five years ago. This is I'm taking the topic.
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  I'm just going into detail how I feel about it right now.
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  So the the narcissist new supply like from season 1 of the
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  narcissist code which had 13183 episodes.
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  Y'all actually gone for four years.
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  The title of it, the Narcissist New Supply and why you shouldn't
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  reach out yo IA. Yeah, I'm a huge proponent of
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  just moving on and not not not just moving on.
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  So it's just this super simplistic and it's just kind of
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  just like letting the narcissist off the hook, right?
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  I'm a huge believer in not reaching out to the new supply
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  most times. Of course, if there was some
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  type of something going on with kids, some messing around with
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  kids, some physical stuff, some attempted charge, some some
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  domestic violence, some charges, some pending charges, things
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  like that. Of course they could.
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  They could sit on your conscience.
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  I know some people just like, just let them find out on their
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  own and then they find out by getting strangled and unalived.
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  And you'd be like, damn, I could have warned them and you might
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  feel bad. And this is not me trying to
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  just like you need to warn them for for before they get
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  unalived. That's not what I'm saying.
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  What I'm saying is, as you are moving forward and it just in
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  these spaces right here, I feel like as you continue to move on,
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  as you continue to grow, as you continue to heal, the new supply
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  will diminish. Unless the new supply is being
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  abusive too. Yeah, sometimes the narcissist
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  new supply, they can be just as bad as the damn narcissist.
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  Let's be real. The narcissist new supply can be
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  just as abusive, just as manipulative, just as demonic as
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  your narcissistic ex. You know they can be worse
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  sometimes they can be like your narcissistic ex might just be a
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  neglectful ex, a neglectful Co parent.
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  The the new supply is stalking, harassing, neglectful, all of
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  the above, like just horrible and helps them out.
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  You see what I'm saying? So This is why I think, I think,
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  I think reaching out to the narcissist new supply, why you
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  should avoid it most times is because most times it's not,
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  it's not going to matter. It's not going to go the way
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  that you think it's going to go. I think a lot of people have it
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  in their minds that if you warn the new person that you can give
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  them enough information so you can save them from this
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  narcissistic person, from the narcissistic abuse, right, from
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  what you went through. But a lot of times it doesn't
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  matter because the narcissist has already gotten to the new
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  supply and the new supply is in the love bombing phase.
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  They don't want to hear it. They're enthralled with the
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  narcissist, right? They're enthralled with the
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  narcissist. They're, they are just, they're
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  they, they're like they got, you know, you seen the old cartoons
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  with the heart eyes. They got heart eyes.
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  They got hearts in their eyes, literally.
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  So they don't want to hear it. They don't want to hear what
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  you're going through. They don't want to hear your
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  experiences. They're like, oh, oh really?
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  That's you, You went through that.
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  Oh, not me. You see what I'm saying?
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  They won't care because they're getting love bombed.
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  They don't they think that they're immune to what you went
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  through. Sometimes they they, they just
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  think that they're better than you.
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  They think that they're more qualified for your ex than you
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  are, right. And that's tough to reconcile
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  with as well. So this is something that you
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  have to understand too, that this narcissistic person, your
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  abusive ex, toxic person, whatever, they're going to be
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  horrible to you. And like I said, sometimes they
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  are like if it was me, let's put my let me put myself in the let
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  me put myself in the narcissist shoe.
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  Let me put my let me put my, my narcissist hat on, right?
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  They put my narc, my narc hat on, right?
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  This is my narc hat, my narc headband.
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  I'm back in narcissist Lee, I'm narcissist.
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  I'm back. If I was, if I had a new supply,
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  I would just tell them that you're crazy.
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  I would tell them that you're probably going to reach out to
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  them and say that I was an abuser, to say that I was toxic
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  to you, to say that I'm a narcissist.
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  I'm going to go ahead and tell the new supply that type of
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  stuff already to get ahead of it.
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  So guess what happens when you reach out?
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  You actually bring me in the new supply closer because it looks
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  like I told the new supply the truth.
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  It looks like I'm a truth teller, right?
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  It looks like I'm a truth teller.
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  Now they trust me more because you reached out and said the
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  exact same thing, exact same thing that they told you that
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  they told them that you were going to say.
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  So now they trust me more. Oh, my goodness, Lee, they were
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  your ex Reach out to me and said exactly what you was that you
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  said. Oh, my goodness.
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  Thank you for warning me because they do sound crazy.
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  Just like you said. Give me a kiss.
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  Here's some cheeks, here's some cheeks.
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  And put the cheeks on you real quick for being so honest.
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  Now you got me because you reached out.
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  You just got me some cheeks. Thanks.
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  You see what I'm saying? I know it's tough, y'all, I know
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  it's tough and a lot of times you like have have I had
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  situations before with people I've done one on ones with that
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  have reached out to the new supply, the new supply left and
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  they became friends. Yes, I've heard these stories
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  before right? But that's a small number of
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  them. Most times they don't care and
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  some people I talked to were the new supply.
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  I do one-on-one coaching with everybody, narcissist,
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  psychiatrist, therapist. I do psychologist, I talk to
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  everybody one-on-one, right? I talked to the new supplies,
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  like Lee, I was the new supply. The ex reached out to me, told
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  me all this, told me all this crazy shit about about this
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  person I was dealing with. I didn't believe them.
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  I trusted my I gave my partner the new, I gave my new partner
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  the benefit of the doubt and I regret it.
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  Do you see what I'm saying? So the Narcissus new supply, you
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  might not want to reach out just based on net right there, just
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  based on general purposes, because that's how it can go
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  right there. At the end of the day, they
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  could be terrible. It could be it could just
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  backfire on you and bring them closer together, which is
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  probably going to make you mad as hell.
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  It's probably going to piss you off because you don't want them
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  to be closer together. You want you trying to help you
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  trying to save this person and somehow they're closer together
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  and now you're angry. So you're like, what?
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  I'm angry, which is of course makes sense.
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  Why wouldn't you be angry? Because you tried to help this
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  person. Because you tried to save this
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  person. So of course you're angry.
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  That absolutely makes 100% sense to me. 100% sense.
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  It makes sense to me that you would be angry.
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  You have every right to be angry.
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  Like I said, you're not. Like there's a lot of times
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  they'll call you the bitter X, right?
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  They'll call you the bitter X. Yeah, yeah.
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  Sometimes it's like, let me be. Let me be real, I don't think
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  it's anything wrong. Bitter might be the wrong word,
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  but I don't think it's anything wrong with being the bitter ex.
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  If they treated you, if you, if they were abusive to you.
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  I'm bitter and I'm pissed the fuck off.
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  Yes, I'm angry. Yes, I'm the angry bitter ex
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  that I got abused. What the fuck is wrong?
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  Yes, I'm angry. I'm upset.
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  I'm mad as hell that I was abused.
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  Shock, surprise. Oh, you not what?
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  Yes, I'm upset. Yes I'm angry, I am the bitter
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  ex, I got abused. I'm bitter enough to reach out
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  to you to try to save you. Not because I want this sorry
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  ass bastard back. I'm trying to help you but not
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  everybody's ready to hear that. Y'all just being real.
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  The new supply might not you be ready to hear that like a lot of
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  times what ends up happening the new supply doesn't listen to you
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  and they end up reaching out to you later on.
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  Just say, hey, you're right. I should have listened to you.
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  They should have listened. But I understand, I also
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  understand the other side of the dynamic, wanting to reach out to
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  the new supply just to try to help them.
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  I also understand that as well, right?
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  I get that. I absolutely understand wanting
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  to reach out to the new supply to try to help them, to try to
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  save them. I understand that completely
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  because you don't want to have a guilty conscience and just feel
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  like maybe I could have done something.
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  Maybe I could have saved them. Maybe I could have gave them a
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  heads up and maybe they could have escaped.
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  Maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe there's a lot.
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  There's a lot of maybe babies, right?
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  There's a lot of maybe babies that are doing nine months.
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  It just in this space right here.
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  There's a lot of maybe babies that are that are going in that
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  space right there. You know, I'll just say this
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  right here. There's so many narcissistic
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  abusive people that have this type of mindset that they're
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  going to try to find a new supply and going to try to do
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  whatever it takes to keep you away from the new supply.
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  And sometimes y'all, let's be real, the new supply is just
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  transitional supply. Sometimes if I'm a, I'm a
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  narcissist, right and put my narcissist's hat back on.
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  Sometimes I'm just, I got a new supply because I don't want to
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  be by myself. This is not permanent new
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  supply. This is temporary supply.
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  This is transitional. Sorry.
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  Yeah, this is transitional supply.
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  My narcissist head came off. I'm allergic to narcissism now,
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  y'all? Oh, my goodness.
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  Transitional supply. So sometimes I have a new supply
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  and I want you to reach out to the new supply.
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  Because if you reach out to the new supply, guess what that
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  means to me? It means that you still care.
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  So to me, that means you. Are you opening the door for me
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  to try to come back into your life?
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  Well, that's not what I that's not what the intent was.
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  Guess what? Intent over impact.
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  I know what that your intent was to just warn the new supply, but
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  the impact it had was letting me know that you still care about
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  me. So I'm going to try to come back
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  into your life. That's the impact that I took
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  from it, right? Your intentions was to warn the
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  new supply to save this person, but the impact was now you got
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  to deal with me. You see what I'm saying?
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  Now you got to deal with me coming back because I never, the
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  new supply that I have right now is just a temporary person that
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  I had because I don't want to be alone because I don't want to be
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  lonely. So that's what the new supply is
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  right now. So that's something you have to
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  consider as well. Sometimes you shouldn't reach
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  out because to the narcissist, you reaching out, it's just it
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  is code for you still carrying, right?
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  It's code for I'm still on your mind and you still want me,
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  right? That's the way it ends up going.
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  And I was other good stuff. You know what I mean?
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  Look at my narcissist had I was getting woozy.
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  I was getting woozy there and whatnot.
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  So I don't think personally, I understand.
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  I understand situationally reaching out to the new supply,
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  right? Of course, I understand that.
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  But overall, protect yourselves at all costs because not all new
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  supplies are going to be nice, decent people.
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  Some of them are just as evil as the narcissist.
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  Some of them are just temporary. And the narcissist is using the
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  new supply that they're sharing all over social media.
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  They're using this new supply as bait to get you to reach out to
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  them. This is what they're doing.
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  They're using a new supply as bait to get you to reach out to
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  them in some way, shape or form. So that's something you have to
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  think about too before you reach out.
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  Is this person bait? Are they baiting me with this
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  new supply right here? Because some narcissists will
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  absolutely bait your ass into trying to come back to them by
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  having a new supply, by having a new person, by doing this, by
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  doing that. This is all things that you have
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  to consider as you're trying to heal and move forward, right?
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  Seriously. So anyways, y'all, welcome to
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  the end of this video. Hit that subscribe button.
• 12:16
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• 12:18
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• 12:27
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• 12:30
  well. And as always, y'all, as always,
• 12:33
  this is peace. What's going on?
• 12:36
  Beautiful folks. Thank you so much for making it
• 12:38
  to the end of my video. I truly appreciate it.
• 12:40
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• 12:53
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• 12:57
  Make sure you stick around, watch another video or two.
• 12:59
  I appreciate it. I'm out.