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Nothing Nowhere Never Ever · Like a Virgin

0:02
Speaker 1: I'm so glad I use my last adderall for this.
0:05
Speaker 1: I feel on welcome to like a virgin the show.
0:13
Speaker 1: We'll give yesterday's pop culture, today's takes. I'm Rosdam, I'm
0:16
Speaker 1: Fran Froda, and we do have a secret third guest
0:18
Speaker 1: in the studio right now currently, I think waiting for
0:21
Speaker 1: an uber and much will be revealed, much will be
0:24
Speaker 1: Are we even allowed to say, we're allowed to say
0:26
Speaker 1: this is our podcast. I don't know. I don't know
0:28
Speaker 1: what friends in the studio right now. We just record
0:30
Speaker 1: an episode of her. She's going to exercise a strain
0:34
Speaker 1: as we have us and Oscar's commentary if she can.
0:37
Speaker 1: Was told to be quiet, and we'll also be well.
0:41
Speaker 1: I think okay. The big thing is that we did
0:43
Speaker 1: finally see Sweeney Todd on Broadway. It's currently in previews.
0:47
Speaker 1: We saw the previews version for sure. Yes, Fran has
0:50
Speaker 1: never seen Sweeney Todd before. I of course it's one
0:53
Speaker 1: of my favorites. Um top line, I'm gonna say seven
0:57
Speaker 1: point five out of ten. Wow. Honestly, I didn't know.
1:00
Speaker 1: I didn't think it was going to be that high.
1:02
Speaker 1: I thought, I don't know. How we felt leaving the theater.
1:04
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not sure how I overall experienced this,
1:07
Speaker 1: but as you said, like, I've always wanted to see
1:09
Speaker 1: a staging and so I was just kind of like
1:11
Speaker 1: so happy to be there the whole time. I was
1:13
Speaker 1: happy to be there too. And the reason it's so
1:15
Speaker 1: high is because it's Sweeney Tide. It is an incredible
1:19
Speaker 1: staging of the show. The scenery is amazing, the twenty
1:25
Speaker 1: six piece orchestra incredible. A lot of the voices are
1:28
Speaker 1: very good. Joanna's sounds really great. That kid from Stranger
1:31
Speaker 1: Things is Toby is really good. The conductor of the
1:35
Speaker 1: twenty six piece orchestra was suckable. Suckable. Josh Grobin would
1:40
Speaker 1: suck but that's kind of the problem. Okay, So now
1:42
Speaker 1: we got to the critiques, which are Josh Groban Annie
1:46
Speaker 1: Ashford both about ten years too young to play either
1:49
Speaker 1: of the roles. An have thought of because I'm not like,
1:53
Speaker 1: I'm not like as in the theater the theater. I
1:56
Speaker 1: didn't know that, Yeah, I didn't. I wasn't thinking about
1:59
Speaker 1: that when I watched it. Annalie also doing a horrible
2:03
Speaker 1: Cockney accent, which was baffling to me because when I
2:06
Speaker 1: watched the Monica Lewinsky like kind of show or whatever.
2:10
Speaker 1: She does an amazing she's really good accent work, and
2:12
Speaker 1: she's such a classically trained Like what I was just
2:15
Speaker 1: I was like, isn't Cockney like one of the asier ones,
2:18
Speaker 1: you know, And the most unfortunate thing is just she
2:21
Speaker 1: just can't sing it. Her voice isn't powerful enough. Her
2:24
Speaker 1: voice sounded great, yeah, but with the accent, it like
2:27
Speaker 1: kind of muddled it. I think no, I mean she
2:29
Speaker 1: she couldn't hit the notes. And I think she acted
2:33
Speaker 1: the role really well. Like the comedy of it was great.
2:36
Speaker 1: She's such a great physical comedian. She had the only laughs.
2:39
Speaker 1: There's a moment where she slides down the stairs that
2:42
Speaker 1: were super funny. Her by the sea like brought the
2:45
Speaker 1: house down, but it didn't bring the house down. Vocally,
2:47
Speaker 1: none of her vocals were quite where they were. And
2:49
Speaker 1: then with Josh Grobin it was a little too perfect. Yeah,
2:54
Speaker 1: he needed to be a little more gruff. And I mean,
2:56
Speaker 1: Sweeney Todd is supposed to be scary and Josh Grobin
2:58
Speaker 1: is not scary. Know. Tommy's like, You're like, no, um,
3:04
Speaker 1: I I feel like, yeah, the thing with me was
3:06
Speaker 1: like I Um, I feel like Josh's vocal quality lent
3:10
Speaker 1: itself perfectly to like the you know, the operatic vocals
3:14
Speaker 1: of a Todd of like Todd right as a character,
3:17
Speaker 1: but like the only I mean again weird. I was
3:20
Speaker 1: dming someone else who's like in the Broadway world about this,
3:22
Speaker 1: who maybe have some friends in the production, and he
3:25
Speaker 1: was defending it a little bit to me, and I
3:26
Speaker 1: was like, Okay, we saw a very very previews, like
3:28
Speaker 1: it had only been in previews for like a week
3:30
Speaker 1: or two, and so we saw a very raw staging.
3:33
Speaker 1: But like the only acting choice Josh Grobin made was
3:36
Speaker 1: to like have a limp, and I was like, I
3:38
Speaker 1: was like, no other choices. I was like, make choices
3:41
Speaker 1: be scary, be weird, be funny. And the thing the
3:44
Speaker 1: thing that I appreciate about Annalie Ashford's Missus Lovett, even
3:47
Speaker 1: though we you know, you said she's a little young,
3:50
Speaker 1: she didn't have that coarseness. I agree with that. Um.
3:53
Speaker 1: I felt like, you know, she added this modernity to
3:56
Speaker 1: miss to Missus Lovett that I appreciate it. I was like,
3:58
Speaker 1: that makes she put her own little spice on it.
4:01
Speaker 1: I see and love like everything that she did and
4:04
Speaker 1: I was like, this is this is working for me? Tommy,
4:06
Speaker 1: you want to chime in before you exit the building.
4:08
Speaker 1: I haven't seen it yet, but I did think the
4:09
Speaker 1: announcement was weird, and I'm going to try and see
4:11
Speaker 1: it this month. And it's one of my favorite musicals
4:13
Speaker 1: of all time. Favorite song. Who would you play? Oh
4:17
Speaker 1: my god? I mean I could see as the beggar woman. Yeah,
4:20
Speaker 1: the beggar woman? Is that how? I'm a bottom Carter's
4:26
Speaker 1: yeah that is unfortunately, yeah, okay, she's she's going to
4:32
Speaker 1: exit the studio hunch. I just really loved Joanna honestly
4:35
Speaker 1: as a song, it so incredible and like just the
4:38
Speaker 1: movie version of that. I actually haven't seen it on stage.
4:40
Speaker 1: Before I'm realizing I only know the movie version. Yeah. Unfortunately,
4:43
Speaker 1: Anthony in this production was not great. Anthony Prosky's kidding here, Yeah,
4:49
Speaker 1: that shockingly. But we have to say the worst part
4:52
Speaker 1: of this production of Sweet Todd was the choreography. What
4:56
Speaker 1: was going on. The thing about Sweeney Todd specifically is
5:01
Speaker 1: that the music is so powerful and the voices singing,
5:05
Speaker 1: especially the first song, the Ballad of Sweeney Todd, is
5:10
Speaker 1: that the music and the voices women together are so
5:13
Speaker 1: intricate and powerful that literally nothing else needs to happen
5:16
Speaker 1: on stage, and yet they undercut that in this production
5:19
Speaker 1: by having them do, as Friend pointed out, all this
5:22
Speaker 1: Martha Graham ass choreography like they're in a high school
5:26
Speaker 1: production of Hair. Yeah, it was Martha Graham is exactly
5:30
Speaker 1: the vibe. It was this kind of pseudo contemporary like
5:34
Speaker 1: fluid bodies like one of the So honestly, I think
5:37
Speaker 1: Rose and I, I don't know if this is your experience,
5:39
Speaker 1: my experience from the first song, we immediately felt this
5:43
Speaker 1: like awfulness about what about this kind of like how
5:47
Speaker 1: the ensemble was stage and something that they try right
5:50
Speaker 1: from jump is the classic, the classic Martha Graham like
5:55
Speaker 1: kind of a pulsating body blob of like you know
5:58
Speaker 1: on someone members, like pulsing whatever, anything like turning into
6:01
Speaker 1: each other like one writhing mass of flesh. And I
6:04
Speaker 1: think it might have been a previous thing. But I
6:05
Speaker 1: also was like, the people in this cast are vocalists.
6:08
Speaker 1: I did not see them all as like choreo girls,
6:11
Speaker 1: and I think when you do the perfectly synchronized human blob,
6:16
Speaker 1: it's like you do have to be perfectly sac They
6:18
Speaker 1: were not. It just doesn't need You don't need choreography
6:23
Speaker 1: with this music, specifically with Sandheim. You should just stand
6:27
Speaker 1: there and sing. It should be good enough that you
6:30
Speaker 1: can do that and it will be powerful. And there
6:32
Speaker 1: were moments where they did small movements like little jerky
6:36
Speaker 1: head things. That is as much as you need to do.
6:40
Speaker 1: It was so overwrought and over choreograph and over choreographed,
6:44
Speaker 1: and it just didn't need to be. But I still say,
6:47
Speaker 1: if you love Sweeney Todd, if you want to see
6:49
Speaker 1: a big, splashy Broadway production of it, definitely go see
6:54
Speaker 1: it's It's absolutely worth it. I still had a fantastic time,
6:57
Speaker 1: and you'll probably see a better version than what we
6:59
Speaker 1: saw from the previews I feel. I mean, it probably
7:02
Speaker 1: won't change that much from opening, but it might change
7:05
Speaker 1: a little, and I would be interested in seeing it again.
7:07
Speaker 1: After it opened. You were saying, you were like, what
7:09
Speaker 1: did they just cut all the correo or something? I
7:11
Speaker 1: like they could, but you're so right. It just they
7:13
Speaker 1: just need spotlight lit from underneath so their faces look
7:15
Speaker 1: really scary, and they need a park and bark spooky spooky. Yeah,
7:19
Speaker 1: speaking of ooky spooky, last night were the Oscars Hollywood
7:23
Speaker 1: spookiest night time of record. Yeah, last night were the Oscars. Yes,
7:27
Speaker 1: I had a little I had a little Oscars gathering.
7:30
Speaker 1: It was my first time entertaining that many people in
7:32
Speaker 1: my home. How did I do as a hostess? The
7:34
Speaker 1: couch was doing a lot of work. The snacks that
7:37
Speaker 1: you that you laid out do that, and we didn't
7:40
Speaker 1: even eat them all. I have so many dips in
7:42
Speaker 1: my fridge. I took cheese home. I also last night
7:45
Speaker 1: I was so worried about people eating on the couch.
7:47
Speaker 1: And I was because I have a white couch. Well
7:49
Speaker 1: it's like an ivory color, and I was so worried
7:51
Speaker 1: about it, about someone like spilling on it. Nothing happened
7:55
Speaker 1: this morning. I like checked it over. I was cleaning
7:57
Speaker 1: it was perfect, and then what did I do? I
8:00
Speaker 1: cut my leg and bled all over the couch. This wording, honey,
8:03
Speaker 1: But it's a it's a performance fabric. It's I already
8:05
Speaker 1: cleaned it off. It is I bought I bought up.
8:08
Speaker 1: I'm not going to get a white couch in a
8:10
Speaker 1: in a fabric that would not like be cleanable. As
8:13
Speaker 1: a seasoned hostess, I mean you're also a seasoned hostess,
8:16
Speaker 1: but not with this house. Um, I will say, little tip.
8:20
Speaker 1: I do not serve foods that can stain anything. So
8:24
Speaker 1: that blueberry cheval you had, which nobody ate, I ate it,
8:27
Speaker 1: you were and you took it home. I love the
8:29
Speaker 1: Trader Joe's blueberry chevro. Okay, I love that cheese. I
8:32
Speaker 1: bought so much food less yesterday, like I bought it
8:35
Speaker 1: as if I was hosting fifteen people because I haven't
8:38
Speaker 1: hosted in a while. But we horked it down. I
8:40
Speaker 1: thought I did a good job. The punch was delicious.
8:42
Speaker 1: Another thing I would not have allowed in my home stainable. Okay,
8:45
Speaker 1: well but but but it was delicious. It was delicious.
8:48
Speaker 1: That is a classic recipe of sorbet and sprite and
8:52
Speaker 1: sprite and like grenadine and cherries. Um. So, our experience
8:56
Speaker 1: of watching the Oscars last night was basically every time
8:59
Speaker 1: a new person was showcased on camera or friend Hilton
9:03
Speaker 1: or I would say would suck or talked about how
9:06
Speaker 1: much we needed their loads, And that was kind of
9:08
Speaker 1: our Oscars experience. There was a kind of low doometer.
9:13
Speaker 1: It was just like how many loads? And when Pedro
9:15
Speaker 1: Pascal came up to present work off there all screamed, well,
9:20
Speaker 1: we screamed, I think before you got there. Pedro did
9:23
Speaker 1: some red carpet interview and he did a thing where
9:25
Speaker 1: he like looked at the camera and we all daddy,
9:28
Speaker 1: We like, we all climaxed instant here. We all became
9:32
Speaker 1: his baby girls. Um, I he's the baby girl, is
9:35
Speaker 1: the reality, and he his his oscars joke was gay.
9:41
Speaker 1: It was gay. Well he's aged. But what we can
9:47
Speaker 1: talk about is that he had that post that was
9:49
Speaker 1: kind of alluding to the fact that like when he
9:52
Speaker 1: was like the answer is like in the wind or whatever,
9:53
Speaker 1: he's kind of staying like, if you're asking questions about
9:56
Speaker 1: my sexuality, I don't give a fuck, Like, yeah, it's there,
9:59
Speaker 1: it's there for the taking. I don't need a comment
10:01
Speaker 1: on it. Further, if that was your interpretation of the post,
10:03
Speaker 1: which some people would not interpret it that way, I
10:06
Speaker 1: feel like, if you're in your fifties and you're at
10:09
Speaker 1: the what is the prime peak of your career? His
10:13
Speaker 1: sister is transum Bella is you know, non binary. You
10:17
Speaker 1: have so many people in your life where this is
10:19
Speaker 1: like a prescient issue, and for him to be like, yeah,
10:22
Speaker 1: why not, Like I thought it was gorgeous king behavior
10:25
Speaker 1: um oscars, you know, as expected everything everywhere all at once,
10:29
Speaker 1: swept no oscars for Tar. It won literally nothing and
10:34
Speaker 1: went home empty hand at Toddfield and his giant hot
10:36
Speaker 1: must have been pissed. Yeah, it was, honestly, there was.
10:40
Speaker 1: That was something that I thought was interesting about. Like
10:43
Speaker 1: the group that we had watching is between you, Me, Hilton, Peyton, Tie,
10:49
Speaker 1: Michael QB. Like Twitter people were we were there like tweets.
10:55
Speaker 1: It was the kind of situation where it's like laptop,
10:58
Speaker 1: you hear the tweets before you see them on Twitter.
11:00
Speaker 1: We were like, weren't shopping everything live. That's like someone
11:03
Speaker 1: would say a joke and then if I got enough laughter,
11:05
Speaker 1: you would see them pull out their phone, and I
11:07
Speaker 1: think that, you know the I think our surprise about
11:09
Speaker 1: the tar of it all was kind of that, right,
11:11
Speaker 1: Like Tar was a Twitter movie. Um, not to reduce
11:15
Speaker 1: it because it's obviously an amazing film, but like we
11:18
Speaker 1: get into these like little echo chambers where we're just like,
11:22
Speaker 1: this is the best thing ever created, right over and
11:24
Speaker 1: over and over again, and then it's like and then
11:26
Speaker 1: you know, but then also Kate did win a lot
11:28
Speaker 1: of a lot of the awards shows leading up to
11:32
Speaker 1: the Oscars, she was the front runner. I mean Michelle.
11:35
Speaker 1: I would say Michelle was more the populist choice. But
11:42
Speaker 1: you know, for both Brendan and Michelle, like these are
11:46
Speaker 1: career wins more than I think specifically for the performance
11:50
Speaker 1: they deliver. As much as we didn't want that fat
11:52
Speaker 1: suit to have an Oscar, the fat suit literally won
11:55
Speaker 1: an Oscar. So insane to say out loud. I mean, yeah,
12:01
Speaker 1: it was wild. I mean rose a victory for us,
12:04
Speaker 1: a loss for you, for everything everywhere all at wants too.
12:07
Speaker 1: So it's not like I hate it kind of, but
12:10
Speaker 1: I'm I'm just means, I'm glad. I'm glad that it's over.
12:14
Speaker 1: I'm glad that award season's over. I'm glad that almost
12:17
Speaker 1: a year after I saw it, that we can now
12:20
Speaker 1: stop talking about everything everywhere all at one. I have
12:22
Speaker 1: to I've nothing nowhere all and never ever, never ever. Okay,
12:31
Speaker 1: I have been thinking about that record about your about
12:35
Speaker 1: your everything everywhere diet tribe for lack of my fatigue.
12:39
Speaker 1: It's really what it is. I have to say. I
12:41
Speaker 1: was thinking about it and I was like, yeah, yeah,
12:43
Speaker 1: it's exhausting when things were talked about for a year.
12:45
Speaker 1: Avatar Way of Water has been talked about for seven years.
12:49
Speaker 1: Do you not grow tired? But like as of last year,
12:52
Speaker 1: I didn't even believe it was really coming out, So
12:54
Speaker 1: it's kind of a different thing. Okay, sure, okay, some
12:57
Speaker 1: stuff we couldn't get into the Last of Us finale happened. Friend,
13:00
Speaker 1: don't watched it yet, so we'll we'll um hit it
13:02
Speaker 1: next week. And also we have a very special announcement
13:06
Speaker 1: coming next week, So multiple announcements, multiple loads. Uh, hang
13:12
Speaker 1: on to your butt. The looter is is that that
13:16
Speaker 1: little thing it's gonna break, It's going all the way
13:18
Speaker 1: to glast is going to shatter. It's like that the
13:21
Speaker 1: side that where it goes all the way over is
13:22
Speaker 1: like bright silk and there's gonna become everywhere. Yeah yeah
13:25
Speaker 1: yeah yeah. Um so whatever, it is, just like, do
13:28
Speaker 1: not miss next week's episode. That's what we're saying. If you,
13:30
Speaker 1: if you sometimes skips skip episodes, which if you are,
13:33
Speaker 1: you're not a real virgin, um, do not skip next
13:36
Speaker 1: week's episode. It is going to be packing. No, make
13:39
Speaker 1: sure you are extra submissive, unbreathable next week. It was
13:58
Speaker 1: a wise woman once said I was in the two
14:01
Speaker 1: one two. Oh yeah, a wise woman. I think she's
14:07
Speaker 1: wise beyond her years. Um, you know, for for not
14:11
Speaker 1: very wise women. One said that New York was the
14:13
Speaker 1: fifth character in a TV show. Shirt are sure? Um,
14:20
Speaker 1: Today we are doing a cute little episode on New
14:23
Speaker 1: York City, Love of our Lives Concrete Jungle. That will
14:31
Speaker 1: never not be funny to me. That should be a hat.
14:34
Speaker 1: Everything should be a hat. Everything should concrete jungle. Um. Anyways,
14:40
Speaker 1: in this concrete Jungle, Rose, we're doing this. We're doing
14:42
Speaker 1: this episode on our beloved Concrete Jungle to honor you know,
14:46
Speaker 1: the my return following your return. Yeah, we are both
14:50
Speaker 1: New Yorkers once again. And I okay, I think this
14:56
Speaker 1: is like a I'll wait till you open your roy
15:00
Speaker 1: my La. Sometimes you forget that sound travel also gets
15:04
Speaker 1: picked up by the microphone. I'm not the only one.
15:07
Speaker 1: I'm not the only one, but I am usually the
15:09
Speaker 1: one usually the Um, when do you think, how long
15:13
Speaker 1: do you think you have to live here before you
15:15
Speaker 1: consider yourself a New Yorker? Um? Um, I'll just say
15:20
Speaker 1: six years because that's how long I lived in New
15:22
Speaker 1: York until I moved to La. See, I will say ten.
15:25
Speaker 1: I think everyone says everyone says ten. I think it's
15:28
Speaker 1: that's like kind of the standard. But I was trying to,
15:30
Speaker 1: you know, put a spin on it too, for you
15:33
Speaker 1: to validate your your own experience. Yeah, well, I mean
15:35
Speaker 1: if you account no, never mind continue. So you think
15:39
Speaker 1: it should be ten, I think it's ten. I don't know.
15:41
Speaker 1: A decade just sounds right to me. But also the
15:46
Speaker 1: real ty, honestly is it's not. It's not that you
15:49
Speaker 1: have to be in New York for ten years. To me,
15:51
Speaker 1: you're a real New Yorker when you want to move
15:54
Speaker 1: to LA and when you want to move to LA,
15:57
Speaker 1: like the magic of New York has worn and it
15:59
Speaker 1: does kind of happen around ten years. Yes, yes, it
16:02
Speaker 1: really does. I know so many people that move to
16:04
Speaker 1: LA for like one, two or maybe three years and
16:07
Speaker 1: then come back. Yeah. Well, well we'll get to that.
16:10
Speaker 1: But I do want to talk about the our you know,
16:14
Speaker 1: our personal New York mythology, because New York City um
16:20
Speaker 1: does loom large and the cultural consciousness. It is a
16:25
Speaker 1: real place, but it is also a like very um fictionalized.
16:31
Speaker 1: Yeah it is. It is an idea as well as
16:35
Speaker 1: a real place. And I think everyone grows up consuming
16:41
Speaker 1: media about New York City. Everyone grows up thinking they
16:45
Speaker 1: understand what this place is, and um, I know what
16:50
Speaker 1: when I am what? How How did New York show
16:55
Speaker 1: up for you in your childhood growing up? Like when
16:59
Speaker 1: did you become conscious of it? I think my earliest
17:03
Speaker 1: consciousness of New York is James and the Giant Peach, which,
17:07
Speaker 1: you know, a lot of the arc of that movie
17:10
Speaker 1: is about getting to New York City, being on the
17:12
Speaker 1: Empire State Building. Um, there's this kind of grand adventure
17:17
Speaker 1: and then the Emerald City at the end. And I
17:19
Speaker 1: think that there are a lot of media like that
17:22
Speaker 1: with New York as this kind of like you know, um,
17:25
Speaker 1: Final Domain or whatever, Yes, the Final Doll. I loved
17:29
Speaker 1: James the Giant Peach and that movie really is like
17:31
Speaker 1: a love letter to York in a very weird way,
17:34
Speaker 1: and a love letter to Peaches, yes, and a love
17:35
Speaker 1: letter to Peaches, and uh, you know, James the Giant
17:40
Speaker 1: Peach walked, so that call Me by your Name could
17:43
Speaker 1: run um I but the real answer is Ugly Betty,
17:48
Speaker 1: which we'll talk about in an Ugly Betty episode, but
17:50
Speaker 1: definitely seeing Betty make it in New York, try to
17:54
Speaker 1: make it in New York like constantly fail, constantly watch
17:58
Speaker 1: people take advantage of her. I think was you know,
18:01
Speaker 1: definitely a fictionalized version of New York, but it was
18:04
Speaker 1: also something that was a lot realer than the media
18:08
Speaker 1: at the time. Like im, you know, have actually gone
18:12
Speaker 1: through so many things that actually happened in the New
18:15
Speaker 1: York life of Betty. So was your sex in the city?
18:18
Speaker 1: Is that an accurate guess? Um? No? I mean, I
18:20
Speaker 1: guess it's kind of different from me because I grew
18:23
Speaker 1: up coming here so often, right, you know, my mom
18:26
Speaker 1: is from New York. My mom is a long Islander,
18:29
Speaker 1: and when I was growing up, my mom's whole family
18:34
Speaker 1: still lived up here. My grandparents lived here. Um, they
18:39
Speaker 1: had a house in Florida. But I grew up visiting
18:43
Speaker 1: New York City, and I think Broadway was probably the
18:46
Speaker 1: entry point for me, because those are my earliest memories
18:48
Speaker 1: of the city are coming in with my grandparents and
18:52
Speaker 1: them taking us to see shows. Do you remember anything
18:55
Speaker 1: about your very first trip or like what? Not very
18:59
Speaker 1: first but definitely only one of the earliest ones I
19:02
Speaker 1: remember was coming in with my grandparents to see Annie
19:05
Speaker 1: Get Your Gun starring Bernadette Peters. Oh my god, it
19:09
Speaker 1: was an iconic moment in my life, and I just, yeah,
19:16
Speaker 1: I have lots of memories of like walking around Times
19:20
Speaker 1: Square and seeing the bright lights, big city. But so yeah,
19:26
Speaker 1: for me, growing up the I had both the idealized
19:33
Speaker 1: version of New York that existed in movies and film
19:37
Speaker 1: and books, and then also the actual experience of it
19:42
Speaker 1: I had coming here because like I spent a lot
19:45
Speaker 1: of time here as a child, and then I came
19:48
Speaker 1: to New York on my own on a lot of
19:50
Speaker 1: school trips, so I had real life experience of the
19:54
Speaker 1: city as I was also watching this fantastical version of it.
19:58
Speaker 1: And yes, definitely, I think Sex in the City was
20:01
Speaker 1: the first time that I really experienced the fantasy New
20:07
Speaker 1: York in media, the sort of the adult New York,
20:13
Speaker 1: the non you know, Broadway new York. I feel like
20:17
Speaker 1: there comes a time like you and I are kind
20:20
Speaker 1: of breaking down the difference between the fantasy New York
20:23
Speaker 1: right and the real version. And I feel like, I
20:26
Speaker 1: think the first time you go to New York, it
20:28
Speaker 1: is kind of immediately demystified, and then when you live
20:32
Speaker 1: in New York after like the first like year or two.
20:34
Speaker 1: It's completely demystified, like it's all over. Like I remember
20:39
Speaker 1: my first trip to New York was I think probably
20:42
Speaker 1: to see Wicked for something. My dad took me and
20:45
Speaker 1: my cousin. I don't remember much of the trip much
20:49
Speaker 1: like you, but I do remember like stepping off of
20:52
Speaker 1: a train or something in Times Square and then just
20:57
Speaker 1: getting that wave of like hot garbage, cigarettes, piss, and
21:03
Speaker 1: halal food smell, you know what I mean? That Like
21:06
Speaker 1: Time Square just smells like and it's not this if
21:08
Speaker 1: you you know, have grown up with the Emerald City
21:10
Speaker 1: version of New York. That's not what you think. You
21:13
Speaker 1: don't know what it smells like, right, And that like wave,
21:17
Speaker 1: the immediate immersion into what is like the worst part
21:19
Speaker 1: of New York City was something that I was just like, oh,
21:22
Speaker 1: this is New York. Like I was probably an interesting
21:25
Speaker 1: fifth grade or something, because because we always came here
21:27
Speaker 1: when I was a kid in the winter, because I
21:29
Speaker 1: grew up in Florida, so we always wanted to be
21:33
Speaker 1: here when it was cold because we didn't have that,
21:38
Speaker 1: And so that was I never experienced like hot, piss,
21:43
Speaker 1: garbage New York until I was and maybe until I
21:49
Speaker 1: lived here because I came here a lot in high
21:53
Speaker 1: school for either school trips or my older brother moved
21:56
Speaker 1: here after college, and I came and stayed with him
22:00
Speaker 1: a couple of times, but again it was always in
22:02
Speaker 1: the winter. There was one memorable time when he was
22:05
Speaker 1: living in Chelsea in a studio apartment and I came
22:07
Speaker 1: and stayed with him, and he worked at He worked
22:11
Speaker 1: in the what is now the Viacom building, and he
22:14
Speaker 1: got me into TRL, and I went to TRL in
22:18
Speaker 1: high school. I know nothing about TRL because I didn't
22:22
Speaker 1: grow up with cable, but I do know that that's
22:23
Speaker 1: a big deal. It was a big deal. Do you remember,
22:25
Speaker 1: And I was like guesting or if there any no
22:28
Speaker 1: but I did go to the Billabong store downstairs and
22:32
Speaker 1: bought some flip flops. Oh of course she did. Yes. Um.
22:38
Speaker 1: I don't remember anything else that I did in my
22:40
Speaker 1: first trips. I remember getting lost in like a kind
22:42
Speaker 1: of pre not pre gentrification Brooklyn, but like the Williamsburg
22:46
Speaker 1: that does not exist now, you know, like it was
22:49
Speaker 1: still before you know, Silicon Valley and all these business
22:54
Speaker 1: ros moved there. I mean, I remember the first time
22:57
Speaker 1: I went to Williamsburg when I was a friend Ashman
23:00
Speaker 1: in college. You know. So this is two thousand and six,
23:03
Speaker 1: and we went to Union Pool and I just remember
23:08
Speaker 1: like feeling like the walk from the L train too.
23:10
Speaker 1: Union Pool was like so long and scared. I was like,
23:15
Speaker 1: where are we? We left the bar and went to
23:17
Speaker 1: someone's apartment a couple of blocks away, and I was
23:20
Speaker 1: like where Because I at that time I was living
23:23
Speaker 1: on the Upper East Side, so it was so foreign
23:26
Speaker 1: to me, and it just felt incredibly lawless. And we
23:30
Speaker 1: were in someone's like loft department. I was like, what
23:34
Speaker 1: the fuck you kind of are giving carry right now?
23:38
Speaker 1: Non or like honestly, like any New York housewife, that's
23:42
Speaker 1: like they want us to go to Brooklyn. Oh my god,
23:45
Speaker 1: but um, you are in high school. I'm in lorn.
23:47
Speaker 1: I mean you bring up a good point, which is
23:49
Speaker 1: that my early trips here before I lived here, it
23:52
Speaker 1: was all about the very touristy parts of New York,
23:57
Speaker 1: seeing Broadway shows, going to you know, Chinatown to get food,
24:02
Speaker 1: going to places like Fao Schwartz. I used to love
24:05
Speaker 1: going to um, going to Jacqueline Hide. Have you ever
24:10
Speaker 1: been to Jacqueline Hide? Don't even know what that? Oh
24:12
Speaker 1: my god, it's a theme restaurant that's like spooky. It's
24:15
Speaker 1: like a rainforest cafe Planet Hollywood. Yeah, but they have
24:19
Speaker 1: like shows and it's like spooky vibes. So it was fun,
24:25
Speaker 1: very fun. What about when you like finally moved here,
24:28
Speaker 1: like do you like digging into I guess our mythologies
24:32
Speaker 1: as you said, like what is there? Like do you
24:34
Speaker 1: remember like first impressions of like because when you move
24:37
Speaker 1: move here, it's a different it's a different thing. Yeah, well,
24:40
Speaker 1: you know, moving here from you know, I moved here
24:43
Speaker 1: at eighteen for college, and it is crazy that the
24:50
Speaker 1: that the first place where I had complete freedom to
24:58
Speaker 1: do whatever I want with no supervision was New York City.
25:02
Speaker 1: You know you kind of did that through your whole childhood.
25:05
Speaker 1: But okay, yeah that's no. But I mean no, I
25:07
Speaker 1: know what you're saying. My mom like dropped me off
25:10
Speaker 1: at my dorm and then went home, and then I
25:13
Speaker 1: could walk out of my dorm and go and go
25:16
Speaker 1: anywhere in New York City. And I did, and I
25:19
Speaker 1: got into a lot of trouble. I did a lot
25:22
Speaker 1: of stupid shit. It is really crazy to drop a
25:26
Speaker 1: teenager off in you know, the this city where you
25:32
Speaker 1: can do anything at any time and be like, okay,
25:35
Speaker 1: figure it out. Do you look back at this like
25:38
Speaker 1: ther first few years fondly or is it so absolutely okay?
25:42
Speaker 1: Good good? Because you you were saying, like I did
25:44
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff, stupid shit, I got in trouble.
25:46
Speaker 1: No that was that was yeah, okay, good, good good,
25:49
Speaker 1: because I think that you have to come to the
25:51
Speaker 1: city and make a lot of mistakes, like you have
25:54
Speaker 1: to be you have to get in trouble. You have
25:57
Speaker 1: to um, meet the wrong people, follow love with the
26:00
Speaker 1: wrong people, like go to the wrong party, like you know, um,
26:04
Speaker 1: I think that some of my more visceral moments like
26:08
Speaker 1: that are like, you know, I used to host I've
26:11
Speaker 1: said this in the pub before. I used to host
26:13
Speaker 1: like a terrible party at Union Essex that was cocktail
26:16
Speaker 1: tire And I remember like sitting on the last step
26:19
Speaker 1: at the jay Z metro stop like in a suit,
26:22
Speaker 1: like barfing and like someone getting me into a cab
26:26
Speaker 1: and like I lost my shoes or like something like that.
26:29
Speaker 1: It's just like I think messie knights like that are
26:32
Speaker 1: you know, they stick in your mind because it's like
26:34
Speaker 1: when you're experiencing it in real time, it's not like, um,
26:38
Speaker 1: oh I'm in trouble. It's oh, I'm in trouble in
26:41
Speaker 1: New York City, Yes, right, And that I think feels
26:45
Speaker 1: bigger and scarier, but it makes your freedom. The New
26:49
Speaker 1: York is what I've always thought is New York is
26:51
Speaker 1: a place of limitless possibilities. Yeah, anything can happen at
26:56
Speaker 1: any time, and it will and it does. And that
26:59
Speaker 1: has true been my experience of it. Um, what are
27:02
Speaker 1: all the different neighborhoods you've lived in here? I've lived
27:05
Speaker 1: in uh So, I went to I moved to New
27:09
Speaker 1: York for a graduate certificate program at NYU and briefly
27:14
Speaker 1: lived in Grammercy in a dorm. Moved to Williamsburg and
27:20
Speaker 1: then South Williamsburg um like the hasidic part of Williamsburg,
27:25
Speaker 1: and was there for three years. And now I live
27:29
Speaker 1: I moved to like redacted. Right, we're not going to
27:32
Speaker 1: say where we live, right, right. I moved to Crown
27:34
Speaker 1: Heights and now I'm in another another neighborhood. I mean,
27:37
Speaker 1: I'm in beds, an undisclosed location. Everyone knows I'm in beds.
27:40
Speaker 1: Diet It's fine. It's a big neighborhood. When I moved
27:44
Speaker 1: to New York for college in two thousand and six,
27:47
Speaker 1: which is the year after the Devilors product came out,
27:50
Speaker 1: so you know, I was really feeling myself. Um. I
27:55
Speaker 1: lived my dorm was in Midtown, Okay, and then after
27:59
Speaker 1: that I moved to the Upper east side of the
28:02
Speaker 1: edge of Spanish Harlem. My first New York apartment was
28:08
Speaker 1: on Fifth Avenue. So when we walked out the front
28:11
Speaker 1: door of our building, Central Park was right there and
28:14
Speaker 1: it ended a block up, so that was really nice.
28:17
Speaker 1: I lived there for through the rest of college. Was
28:20
Speaker 1: it chic being on the upper upper It was not
28:23
Speaker 1: the way we lived in that apartment was not cheek.
28:26
Speaker 1: Nothing chic about it. Um. And then I lived on
28:28
Speaker 1: the Lower east Side in a two bedroom apartment with
28:30
Speaker 1: four other people. O god, are those are my crackhead days?
28:36
Speaker 1: And then I was one of the early Bushwick gentrifiers.
28:40
Speaker 1: I moved truly. I moved to Bushwick in two thousand. Oh. Well, no,
28:45
Speaker 1: I briefly lived in Chinatown, which I actually loved. That
28:49
Speaker 1: also sounds cheek. Um, it was chic. And then I
28:52
Speaker 1: moved to Bushwick. And then I lived in Bushwick for
28:58
Speaker 1: eight years until I moved until I moved to LA
29:02
Speaker 1: and then moved back here and now I live and
29:04
Speaker 1: beepy Okay, I for a while you you kind of
29:09
Speaker 1: really wanted to be a Manhattan girly. You were like,
29:12
Speaker 1: I think I want to live in Manhattan. Yeah, I
29:14
Speaker 1: do think that at some point in my life perhaps
29:18
Speaker 1: I will want to live in Manhattan again. I always
29:21
Speaker 1: my fantasy, for sure was West Village, always growing up.
29:26
Speaker 1: Once I found out that that's where Carrie's actual apartment was,
29:31
Speaker 1: it's well, it's on Perry Street if you've never been,
29:34
Speaker 1: and like every a list of celebrity whatever, Julianne Moore,
29:36
Speaker 1: Meryl Street. But I always wanted to live in a
29:40
Speaker 1: brownstone in the West Village. But then when I was
29:46
Speaker 1: in my early freelancing days, I went to interview lev Grossman,
29:53
Speaker 1: who is the author of The Magicians, which I think
29:56
Speaker 1: I've talked about on the show before, and I went
29:59
Speaker 1: to interview him at his house in this beautiful brownstone
30:02
Speaker 1: that he lived in in the neighborhood that I currently
30:05
Speaker 1: live in. And I remember thinking when I went to
30:08
Speaker 1: interview him and we hung out his house, we like
30:11
Speaker 1: drank a bunch of whiskey, and I remember thinking this
30:14
Speaker 1: is the life I want. I want to live in
30:15
Speaker 1: this neighborhood one day, and now I live a couple
30:19
Speaker 1: blocks away from there, and so it is like very
30:22
Speaker 1: much like I have finally the aversion of the New
30:27
Speaker 1: York life that I really imagined myself having a long
30:31
Speaker 1: time ago. Honestly, same with my apartment. I truly I'm
30:35
Speaker 1: like living in the apartment of my dreams, a very
30:37
Speaker 1: expensive apartment of my dreams that like I want to
30:40
Speaker 1: live in forever. Your apartment as well, again not telling
30:43
Speaker 1: where it is. Your apartment is a forever apartment. It is.
30:46
Speaker 1: So it's definitely I think this is the last apartment
30:52
Speaker 1: that I want to rent. I think I will move
30:56
Speaker 1: when I'm ready. I mean, who knows when this will happen,
30:58
Speaker 1: when I'm ready to buy something, hopefully in a couple
31:03
Speaker 1: of years. That's even something we're able to do by
31:08
Speaker 1: property in New York. But it is, it's not it's
31:12
Speaker 1: not the apartment of my dreams, but it's definitely something
31:15
Speaker 1: that I always fantasized about, which is aloft in New
31:18
Speaker 1: York City, And that is what I have now, and
31:21
Speaker 1: it is it is a certain kind of fantasy. We
31:24
Speaker 1: are honestly being so unrelatable talking about like a renting
31:28
Speaker 1: our one bedrooms in cute little neighborhoods. But like we
31:30
Speaker 1: have the virgins have to know, like we came from
31:33
Speaker 1: the bottom, we've lived scum like well, I mean I
31:37
Speaker 1: just said I lived in a two bedroom partment with
31:39
Speaker 1: four other people. And this is how it worked. So
31:42
Speaker 1: in each of the bedrooms there was a loft in
31:45
Speaker 1: each of them. So one person's bed was in the loft,
31:48
Speaker 1: and one person's bed was on the floor, and then
31:51
Speaker 1: our fifth, the fifth person in the apartment, her bedroom,
31:55
Speaker 1: her her bed, her loft was in the living room
31:59
Speaker 1: above the refrigeration. And we lived on Rivington and Clinton,
32:03
Speaker 1: which you know is like a very gaggy intersection. And
32:07
Speaker 1: we all paid five hundred dollars a month that is
32:12
Speaker 1: parais like, and like it didn't matter that we were
32:16
Speaker 1: all sleeping on top of each other because this was
32:18
Speaker 1: the time in my life when I was like out
32:20
Speaker 1: every night every day. I was like partying all the time.
32:24
Speaker 1: If I was home, we were having a party there
32:27
Speaker 1: or just like sleeping or whatever. You know. That was
32:30
Speaker 1: my my young wild days. Although like pre my wild
32:37
Speaker 1: party girl days, this was my wild straight partying days
32:43
Speaker 1: when I would just like party with my straight friends
32:45
Speaker 1: and then like go out and hook up with randas
32:48
Speaker 1: all the time. Oh my god, that was that fun
32:51
Speaker 1: or not? Yeah, it was fun, you know, it was living.
32:54
Speaker 1: I was like sewing my wild oats, Like that's the
32:56
Speaker 1: apartment where I did. I turned twenty one. It was
33:00
Speaker 1: like right after I turned twenty one, So it was
33:03
Speaker 1: like New York was my oyster. I feel like it
33:05
Speaker 1: has to. You have to hit the ground running in
33:08
Speaker 1: New York. You have to live paycheck to paycheck. New
33:11
Speaker 1: York has to be your oyster to some extent. I
33:14
Speaker 1: one of my I think my first year in New York,
33:16
Speaker 1: I had like eleven addresses in like one year. Like
33:20
Speaker 1: I was just moving and moving and moving and moving.
33:22
Speaker 1: I remember subletting a place in Williamsburg for six hundred
33:25
Speaker 1: dollars a month that had no windows, none. It was
33:29
Speaker 1: like so awful, but like you know, you're just happy
33:32
Speaker 1: to be there and you it's a make it work.
33:34
Speaker 1: It's always a make it work moment. When I first
33:37
Speaker 1: moved to New York, I actually slept on the couch
33:40
Speaker 1: of someone that I met on Tumblr. Isn't that amazing? Yeah,
33:43
Speaker 1: Like Umbler really brings people together, and honestly, it was
33:48
Speaker 1: I will be so grateful for this as like my
33:51
Speaker 1: induction to New York, or rather the inductor like indoctrinating
33:55
Speaker 1: me into New York in my first few weeks, because
33:58
Speaker 1: he was a more crunchy like artist Williamsburg type, and
34:02
Speaker 1: so he showed me those parts of New York, like
34:05
Speaker 1: he took me to Reespeech, he took me to again. Yeah,
34:10
Speaker 1: I love Reespeach. We have opposite of I. Um, you know,
34:14
Speaker 1: he took me to Metropolitan. I saw. I had never
34:16
Speaker 1: seen a drag show before he showed me. My first
34:19
Speaker 1: drag show was I'm pretty sure my first drag show
34:22
Speaker 1: was severely mame. Oh, that's I think a really good
34:27
Speaker 1: I think that's a really good first show. And I
34:29
Speaker 1: just didn't really know what drag was. But I think
34:32
Speaker 1: that when you can because a lot and I think
34:35
Speaker 1: a lot of the reasons that I didn't know what
34:36
Speaker 1: it was because of my background, but also like drag
34:39
Speaker 1: is something that isn't really good on a video. You
34:43
Speaker 1: have to be in person to see what it feels like.
34:46
Speaker 1: And I think that that you know, said a lot
34:48
Speaker 1: about the kind of New York that I was attracted
34:51
Speaker 1: to and immediately found myself inside of. You know, it's
34:55
Speaker 1: like the space is being in a drag performance. So
35:15
Speaker 1: we talked about how we kind of now have achieved
35:19
Speaker 1: a sort of real life version of the New York
35:22
Speaker 1: that we fantasized about. But was there a moment for
35:26
Speaker 1: you when your real life experience of being here really
35:33
Speaker 1: clashed with the fantasy New York, Like, do you remember
35:37
Speaker 1: a moment of that, like fantasy New York kind of
35:40
Speaker 1: shattering for you? My Jone didion goodbye to all that momentum.
35:47
Speaker 1: I'm the first one that comes to mind is when
35:50
Speaker 1: my first boyfriend in New York broke up with me.
35:52
Speaker 1: It's the only time I've ever been broken up with
35:55
Speaker 1: And I just remember like crying on a bus, like
36:00
Speaker 1: leaving Park Slope. Crying on a bus is so humiliating.
36:04
Speaker 1: And then as I was getting off the bus, still crying,
36:07
Speaker 1: I fell eight shitt like got like scuffed my knees
36:12
Speaker 1: was like covered in blood and like crying, and it
36:15
Speaker 1: was just it was a low moment for a lot
36:17
Speaker 1: of different reasons, because you know, career stuff was always stressful,
36:22
Speaker 1: boy stuff was stressful, trying to pay rent, was stressful,
36:27
Speaker 1: and I think it. Yeah, everyone has a kind of
36:30
Speaker 1: boiling point or a moment where it's just like, oh fuck,
36:33
Speaker 1: like what am I doing? But you know it didn't
36:36
Speaker 1: last that long. What about you? I think for me
36:38
Speaker 1: it actually was that first time I went to Brooklyn,
36:40
Speaker 1: because I think it wasn't necessarily a negative experience. It
36:44
Speaker 1: was just a realization that the city was so much
36:48
Speaker 1: bigger than what I had imagined it as or what
36:52
Speaker 1: or what the version that had been sold to me was, Like,
36:56
Speaker 1: New York City was not just Time Square, Chinatown and
37:01
Speaker 1: Bloomingdale's and Central Park. Um, there was There were all
37:06
Speaker 1: these other boroughs and they were full of real people
37:08
Speaker 1: living their lives. You just reminded me that my very
37:12
Speaker 1: first New York tip, when I was in fifth grade,
37:14
Speaker 1: I did make pilgrimage to the Balto statue in Central Park. Wow,
37:19
Speaker 1: did you? I was not. I have always wanted to
37:24
Speaker 1: piss on um. The imagine hippies would be so mad
37:32
Speaker 1: at you. I love making hippies mad. No, I would
37:35
Speaker 1: love to piss on the Balto statue. Um Balto was hot?
37:39
Speaker 1: Can we say that? We can say that? Um? So
37:44
Speaker 1: we both have left New York I've left New York
37:47
Speaker 1: a couple of times, but I think them we both did, like,
37:51
Speaker 1: you know, the real leaving New York when we moved
37:54
Speaker 1: to Los Angeles. Um the weekend before I moved, which
37:59
Speaker 1: was in Covid Um, so obviously like New York wasn't
38:03
Speaker 1: exactly what it was. But it was June twenty twenty,
38:06
Speaker 1: so things were kind of starting to to come back. Um.
38:12
Speaker 1: My best friend did rent a cart so we could
38:14
Speaker 1: do a goodbye tour of New York. And remember you
38:18
Speaker 1: talking about Yeah, so the stops for my goodbye tour
38:22
Speaker 1: were I believe we we maybe got bagels in the
38:27
Speaker 1: morning and then went to Central Park. I went to
38:32
Speaker 1: the Alice in Wonderland statue, which I love. Um. Then
38:35
Speaker 1: we drove we drove over to the gershwin Um, which
38:40
Speaker 1: is the theater where Wick it is, just to like
38:42
Speaker 1: wave and say hi, um so Gorney. Then we virgins
38:47
Speaker 1: don't know, I mean not all the reasons know. You
38:49
Speaker 1: are a corny girl. I am a very I'm Carrie Broadshaw.
38:52
Speaker 1: You are carry um. Then we drove downtown and went
38:56
Speaker 1: to CATS's and got Cornbee sandwiches. Was having I had
39:00
Speaker 1: what she was having, um and then we went to
39:05
Speaker 1: the West Village, went to Carry's apartment and all the
39:08
Speaker 1: picture it took a video, and also there is a
39:11
Speaker 1: video of us singing of us singing the Sex and
39:14
Speaker 1: the City theme song outside Carry's apartment. Then I think
39:16
Speaker 1: we went we went to Magnolia Bakery and got cupcakes,
39:18
Speaker 1: even though Magnolia is not the best cupcakes in the city,
39:21
Speaker 1: real ones, no Billy's Bakery, which I don't even know
39:24
Speaker 1: if it still exists. Nobody thinks Magnolia is good. Magnolia
39:28
Speaker 1: is not good. Cupcakes are bad, cupcakes are delicious. This
39:33
Speaker 1: is the first wrong. This was my first wrong take
39:35
Speaker 1: on like a virgin. I remember when I told you that,
39:37
Speaker 1: you were like, what the fuck are you talking about?
39:39
Speaker 1: But cupcakes are just not good. They don't make sense
39:43
Speaker 1: to me. Did you do any sort of Goodbye New
39:46
Speaker 1: York tour when you left? No, you're you're not sentimental
39:50
Speaker 1: about stuff like that. I you know, it depends the
39:53
Speaker 1: context of my leaving New York was like very fraught
39:56
Speaker 1: and you know, very different from yours. I left York
40:00
Speaker 1: when I wasn't really ready to. I was in love
40:02
Speaker 1: with my Brooklyn fam. I was in love with drag
40:05
Speaker 1: here I was. I felt like I had just gotten
40:07
Speaker 1: a kind of new momentum in New York, and all
40:10
Speaker 1: of a sudden, I had this job in La lined
40:13
Speaker 1: up for me, and it was something that I felt
40:14
Speaker 1: like I couldn't pass up. And so I was like,
40:16
Speaker 1: you know, I can do this and come back to
40:18
Speaker 1: Brooklyn every month. And I kind of, I mean, when
40:21
Speaker 1: it wasn't a pandemic, like I kind of did. So
40:23
Speaker 1: it never felt as much like a goodbye, but no, yeah,
40:27
Speaker 1: my goodbye was pretty much like I sent an email
40:30
Speaker 1: to like all my loved ones and that and like
40:32
Speaker 1: and I was just like I'm so sorry, like this
40:34
Speaker 1: job is happening an immediate immediately and I have to
40:36
Speaker 1: go now, and it was. It was actually really sad.
40:38
Speaker 1: But I think that there's a lot of like drama
40:42
Speaker 1: and a lot of Joe Diddy and goodbye to all
40:44
Speaker 1: that energy when it comes to like leaving New York,
40:47
Speaker 1: that like I didn't want to participate in because I
40:50
Speaker 1: was just like, I'm not leaving, like I know, New
40:52
Speaker 1: York is my final destination. This is like a goodbye
40:55
Speaker 1: for now, you know. And I was sad to leave it.
40:58
Speaker 1: I really was, even though I appreciate the break, and
41:02
Speaker 1: everyone I think needs breaks from New York. I felt
41:05
Speaker 1: the same way. I knew that it was a goodbye
41:07
Speaker 1: for now. I said to everyone that I was leaving
41:12
Speaker 1: with the intention of coming back. But it did feel
41:17
Speaker 1: to me like the end of an era, a very
41:19
Speaker 1: long era, because I lived. But when I left, I
41:22
Speaker 1: had lived in New York for fourteen years, just a
41:25
Speaker 1: really long fucking time. You know. It was like my
41:30
Speaker 1: whole adulthood took place here, and I just felt like
41:35
Speaker 1: that time of my life was over. I was ready to,
41:40
Speaker 1: you know, move into the next part of my life
41:42
Speaker 1: and my career. I thought that was in LA, and
41:44
Speaker 1: like in certain ways it was. But then deciding to
41:48
Speaker 1: come back, you know, I always knew I was going
41:51
Speaker 1: to come back New York. I get the same as you.
41:54
Speaker 1: New York does feel like home. I do consider myself
41:57
Speaker 1: a New Yorker. I always knew I would be back here.
42:00
Speaker 1: I just thought I would be in LA for longer.
42:04
Speaker 1: But I felt like I was in LA for too long,
42:06
Speaker 1: like maybe like six months too long. But it also,
42:09
Speaker 1: I mean, the pandemic skewed so much of it, like
42:12
Speaker 1: I was basically one year, like I was in Los
42:14
Speaker 1: Angeles for just under two and a half years. It
42:18
Speaker 1: went by so quickly, and it feels like but it
42:22
Speaker 1: feels like I was there for no time at all.
42:24
Speaker 1: And I know that that's not actually that long of
42:26
Speaker 1: a time, but I I just felt this place calling
42:33
Speaker 1: me back. And I do think that most of the
42:36
Speaker 1: people I know who are New Yorkers, like it's not
42:39
Speaker 1: about the time that they've spent here. I do think
42:45
Speaker 1: like there is a call that you hear that tells
42:49
Speaker 1: you you need to be here, and when you find
42:53
Speaker 1: your place, I think that's when you're a New Yorker.
42:58
Speaker 1: I agree, it's when you find your people, like you
43:00
Speaker 1: find your subculture. And yeah, that's so true. I think
43:05
Speaker 1: it's something that honestly separates like New Yorkers from people
43:09
Speaker 1: that move to Los Angeles or any other cities. Like
43:11
Speaker 1: if you move to New York, it's like because you
43:15
Speaker 1: you know who you are and you're waiting for like
43:18
Speaker 1: everyone to like discover you right like you you're you're
43:22
Speaker 1: you have bought into like who you are as a
43:25
Speaker 1: person and everything that makes you great, and you're like,
43:27
Speaker 1: I'm just waiting for everyone to like catch up with me.
43:29
Speaker 1: You know what, I mean, and I think that there's
43:32
Speaker 1: so much power in that like New York ambition that
43:36
Speaker 1: like lets you, as we've been talking about, like manifest,
43:40
Speaker 1: tryanifest your dreams and really create the job that you want,
43:44
Speaker 1: create the world that you want, like anything you want.
43:48
Speaker 1: There's also you have to be a masochist if you
43:50
Speaker 1: want to live here. Yeah, you do, because it's so
43:53
Speaker 1: hard to survive here, and the feeling of accomplishment you
43:59
Speaker 1: get from you know, if you can make it here,
44:02
Speaker 1: you can make it anywhere. It's so corny. But the
44:04
Speaker 1: reason why all of these sayings, why like all of
44:08
Speaker 1: those like corny, these ideas about New York are so enduring,
44:14
Speaker 1: is because ultimately they're true. You have to hustle so
44:19
Speaker 1: hard to survive here. It's like an extra job on
44:22
Speaker 1: top of whatever it is you do is just you know,
44:26
Speaker 1: making it, and once you have accomplished that, it does
44:30
Speaker 1: really feel like doing that anywhere else is so easy
44:34
Speaker 1: and like you feel like a big fish anywhere else. Yeah,
44:37
Speaker 1: I mean that sounds so kind of sending, but it's
44:39
Speaker 1: like it is kind of true. It's it's I think
44:41
Speaker 1: that it can be a bad and a good thing,
44:44
Speaker 1: and you know, being being back here, it just feels
44:50
Speaker 1: so much different. I feel like a grown up in
44:54
Speaker 1: a way that I didn't the last time I was here.
44:57
Speaker 1: And I just like, um, you know, like in season
45:00
Speaker 1: five of Sex in the City, when Carrie said that
45:02
Speaker 1: she was dating New York. M that's how I feel.
45:05
Speaker 1: I'm like falling in love with with um New York again.
45:09
Speaker 1: And and uh and ain't nobody talking shit about my boyfriend? Yeah,
45:15
Speaker 1: Carrie says in that episode, New York is like a
45:17
Speaker 1: little bit of like an abusive boyfriend. Though, like New
45:19
Speaker 1: York will like, don't cancel us, We're saying, New York
45:22
Speaker 1: will absolutely like just like you know, fuck your brains
45:26
Speaker 1: out and like make you feel amazing and then wake
45:28
Speaker 1: up the next morning and like you know, kick you
45:30
Speaker 1: in the nerds or like you know, make fun of
45:32
Speaker 1: you in front of your friends or whatever. You know,
45:34
Speaker 1: it's the chicest thing you can do in New York
45:36
Speaker 1: that you don't really do anymore. And I miss it
45:39
Speaker 1: so much. Hailing a cab a taxi just she's stepping
45:44
Speaker 1: out onto a curb, like pointing your toe, lifting your
45:48
Speaker 1: arm up in the air. I miss that era of
45:53
Speaker 1: New because now it's all Ubers and like you can't
45:56
Speaker 1: you you know, I moved here in the way of
46:00
Speaker 1: sex in the city, like the Devil Worst Product, Ugly
46:04
Speaker 1: Betty was on the air, like I was living that fantasy.
46:08
Speaker 1: I was like, I mean, I was not living that
46:09
Speaker 1: fantasy because I was like broke, I was not a
46:12
Speaker 1: woman yet whatever. But I still have many moments of
46:18
Speaker 1: stepping onto the curb and hilling my little taxi. How
46:22
Speaker 1: do you feel about like in this Emerald City kind
46:26
Speaker 1: of version of New York. This is a city that
46:30
Speaker 1: a lot of people come to to be surrounded by
46:32
Speaker 1: more queer people, right to experience nightlife, to experience drag,
46:35
Speaker 1: to experience whatever it is queer and trance people do here,
46:38
Speaker 1: which is a lot of different shit. Do you feel like,
46:40
Speaker 1: you know, people in small towns or people that aren't
46:43
Speaker 1: in New York like should move here? Do you think
46:45
Speaker 1: that like being here, making it here is something that's
46:49
Speaker 1: like unlike any other Like what would you say to
46:52
Speaker 1: someone that's thinking about moving to New York? I mean,
46:55
Speaker 1: I don't think it's for everyone agree, and usually you
47:01
Speaker 1: will find that out within the first year. I used
47:04
Speaker 1: to have a rule that I didn't date or become
47:09
Speaker 1: friends with anyone who hadn't lived here for at least
47:12
Speaker 1: a year yet, because they I saw so many people
47:17
Speaker 1: who just didn't make it that first year, and I
47:19
Speaker 1: didn't want to get attached. And also that first year
47:22
Speaker 1: is so crazy fresh New York. It is a vibe
47:26
Speaker 1: the very specific type of person yea, And I just
47:28
Speaker 1: like was very hardline about that, especially with dating. I'm
47:32
Speaker 1: going on I'm going on dates with someone who's a
47:34
Speaker 1: fresh New Yorker right now. Well, good luck with that. Um.
47:38
Speaker 1: But it really again like if you hear, if you
47:42
Speaker 1: hear the call, if you feel like you're meant to
47:47
Speaker 1: be here, um, definitely try it out. But only if
47:53
Speaker 1: you have like three thousand dollars. Yeah, Like at the
47:57
Speaker 1: very least, Unfortunately a lot of it is about money.
48:00
Speaker 1: It's it's about honestly, it's about having a portal. If
48:04
Speaker 1: that's money, if that's a friend who you can crash with,
48:08
Speaker 1: or who will you know, like show you around the city,
48:11
Speaker 1: if that's having family here, chosen, biological, whatever. I think
48:15
Speaker 1: a portal is very important. And for some people that
48:19
Speaker 1: portal really just is believing this is the place they
48:22
Speaker 1: were always meant to be and they figured out I
48:24
Speaker 1: know so many people like that, who like Madonna who
48:28
Speaker 1: moved here with thirty seven dollars in her pocket whatever,
48:32
Speaker 1: and just make it work. And if you if you
48:37
Speaker 1: feel the call to that extent, like, absolutely do it.
48:41
Speaker 1: But do you think you need a job to move
48:44
Speaker 1: here before you come here? It definitely helps, Yeah, it
48:48
Speaker 1: definitely helps. I don't think you do. I think job
48:50
Speaker 1: opportunities create themselves when you, you know, show up at
48:54
Speaker 1: parties and meet people and stuff like that. But um,
48:57
Speaker 1: if you're moving here, I definitely would say, like, do
49:03
Speaker 1: like a stint here first, like have a summer here,
49:05
Speaker 1: or have a month here, or like crash with a friend,
49:08
Speaker 1: find like a cheap living situation where you can sublet
49:11
Speaker 1: and just experience New York for a quick moment. You'll
49:15
Speaker 1: experience all the magical parts of New York, but you
49:18
Speaker 1: have to pay attention to the things that are like
49:20
Speaker 1: wearing you down and see how much longevity that has because,
49:24
Speaker 1: just as you said, I, when you move here, if
49:28
Speaker 1: you've been living here for a few years, New York
49:31
Speaker 1: is at some point going to break your spirit and
49:34
Speaker 1: absolutely and after it does the first time, which it
49:37
Speaker 1: might multiple times, but after it does the first time.
49:39
Speaker 1: It's up to you to decide whether it's worth it
49:41
Speaker 1: to continue. And I think that sometimes it's just too much,
49:45
Speaker 1: and you're like, this is actually not my vibe, But
49:48
Speaker 1: I do you used to be. I feel like now
49:51
Speaker 1: that you don't have to front three months rent in
49:53
Speaker 1: New York anymore, you can really move here with like
49:55
Speaker 1: three or four grand, you know, if you're finding roommates
49:58
Speaker 1: and stuff. But like I think you should have like five.
50:01
Speaker 1: You should save up like five thousand dollars. Like I
50:03
Speaker 1: think when I moved here, I had saved up four
50:06
Speaker 1: thousand dollars. I don't remember, but that's like very specific. Yeah,
50:13
Speaker 1: I you know, if I'm going off of I'm going
50:17
Speaker 1: off of more vibes than than capital vibes. You know,
50:37
Speaker 1: what is the most New York moment ever? And I
50:40
Speaker 1: might have talked about this before, So Charlotte, friend of
50:44
Speaker 1: the podcast, Charlene, She and I have been friends for
50:49
Speaker 1: a long time, and I so Charlene. I think it's
50:54
Speaker 1: like ten years ago now is when she started doing
50:56
Speaker 1: drag and she and I became friends. We like saw
51:00
Speaker 1: each other out at TNT a lot and became the
51:04
Speaker 1: first gay bar I ever went to in New York. Um, yeah,
51:07
Speaker 1: and became friendly. And then one night at the Spectrum,
51:13
Speaker 1: the original Spectrum, we were like standing around chatting and
51:18
Speaker 1: she said, you know that I'm and she said her
51:23
Speaker 1: dead name, and oh, and it was because she and
51:28
Speaker 1: I had lived in that apartment on the Lower Side
51:32
Speaker 1: where I lived in a two bedroom with four other people.
51:35
Speaker 1: She had lived above me pre transition, both when both
51:40
Speaker 1: of us were pre transition, And that was one of
51:44
Speaker 1: those like circular New York moments where I realized this
51:47
Speaker 1: person who was becoming very important with my life, she
51:52
Speaker 1: and I had known each other on this whole other
51:54
Speaker 1: point on our timelines, like like at least like two
51:59
Speaker 1: lives ago from the point where we were now, and
52:04
Speaker 1: you know, this is a person who is still one
52:06
Speaker 1: of my closest friends. And that is like such a
52:10
Speaker 1: New York moment to me. It's like realizing that the
52:14
Speaker 1: people around you are having these experiences that are running
52:19
Speaker 1: parallel to yours, that intersect with yours, and you can
52:23
Speaker 1: be like a point on each other's timelines, and like
52:27
Speaker 1: sometimes you change in the same ways, and like it's
52:31
Speaker 1: crazy that like a person who, who, like you used
52:35
Speaker 1: to think was just like the annoying. You know, neighbor
52:39
Speaker 1: who lives upstairs, like a couple years later is your
52:42
Speaker 1: like best trans girlfriend. So I'm like, oh no, that's
52:45
Speaker 1: kind of beautiful. It is beautiful. I have like a
52:47
Speaker 1: similar but very different story where one of the first
52:51
Speaker 1: gay bars I ever went to. I don't know if
52:52
Speaker 1: this was T T and T or not, but my
52:54
Speaker 1: first week in New York, I was taken to a
52:57
Speaker 1: gay bar where I saw my like high school arch nemesis,
53:01
Speaker 1: like someone who had bullied me like in this like
53:05
Speaker 1: dangerous like gay love triangle through my whole high school career.
53:10
Speaker 1: And I remember seeing him out at a bar and
53:12
Speaker 1: being like, oh my god. You know, when you moved
53:14
Speaker 1: to New York, you come to like reinvent yourself a
53:16
Speaker 1: little bit, if that's not too cliche to say, you
53:19
Speaker 1: leave behind whatever you were before New York so you
53:22
Speaker 1: can just be your New York self. And so when
53:25
Speaker 1: I saw him at this bar, remember being like, oh
53:28
Speaker 1: my god, like you're just thrown back into the person
53:30
Speaker 1: you used to be for the lack of a better
53:32
Speaker 1: way of putting it, And I remember he pulled me
53:34
Speaker 1: aside and was like, Oh, it's so good to see you. Know,
53:37
Speaker 1: I have to tell you, I'm like so sorry for
53:39
Speaker 1: like how I acted all those years ago. It was
53:41
Speaker 1: like not it was like this like perfect apology, like
53:44
Speaker 1: just apologizing for all this like trauma that he had
53:47
Speaker 1: put me through or whatever. And I just remember thinking
53:50
Speaker 1: like I don't care, like I don't care about you,
53:53
Speaker 1: like you have nothing to do with my life anymore.
53:55
Speaker 1: And that is so much. That is so far away
53:58
Speaker 1: now and we are like our ships asking in the
54:00
Speaker 1: wind in this gay bar and then never I never
54:02
Speaker 1: saw him again. Is like we're in our new lives
54:05
Speaker 1: and like it felt so great for someone who used
54:08
Speaker 1: to torment me to actually like mean nothing in that space.
54:12
Speaker 1: You know. I think that there are a lot of
54:14
Speaker 1: quote unquote the most New York moments ever are moments
54:18
Speaker 1: where I'm in a bar, or in a club or
54:21
Speaker 1: at dinner and I'm sitting there and I think, oh
54:24
Speaker 1: my god, I'm at dinner with blah blah blah blah
54:26
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah, and like one of them
54:28
Speaker 1: is like a celebrity and the other one is like
54:30
Speaker 1: someone who have I've idolized online forever, or like I
54:33
Speaker 1: remember I used to reblog images that that person took
54:35
Speaker 1: or like I like you're you're my idol and you didn't.
54:38
Speaker 1: You don't even know how much I stand you, and
54:40
Speaker 1: like we're friends now or whatever. Like you get to
54:43
Speaker 1: be friends with your heroes here, And I don't really
54:46
Speaker 1: mean celebrity heroes. I just mean like the artists that
54:49
Speaker 1: you know, you admire and the people that you want
54:51
Speaker 1: to be in community with. Yes, but let's be real.
54:55
Speaker 1: The realist New York moments are when you cry on
54:59
Speaker 1: the subway or see someone's dick on the subway, or
55:04
Speaker 1: see someone's shit on the subway. Oh not shit? Yeah,
55:08
Speaker 1: oh no, or when you have sex on the subway.
55:13
Speaker 1: Yeah you haven't. No, I've always wanted to. No. Yeah, Wow, Wow,
55:20
Speaker 1: that is that's the real New York Baby New Yeah Que.
55:25
Speaker 1: Wendy Williams cover of New York Que Lady Gaga's cover
55:29
Speaker 1: of New York, New York. Have you ever seen that?
55:31
Speaker 1: It's from there's this um Frank Sinatra special that she
55:36
Speaker 1: covered New York, New York and it is an incredibly
55:38
Speaker 1: iconic performance. I want to see that slide into our
55:49
Speaker 1: DMS at like a Virgin for twenty sixty nine to
55:51
Speaker 1: let us know Are you a New Yorker? Are you
55:52
Speaker 1: a native New Yorker? What are your very first New
55:54
Speaker 1: York stories? And um, you know? Follow us on Instagram,
55:59
Speaker 1: follow us individually. I'm your co host Rose Damue. You
56:03
Speaker 1: can follow me anywhere you want online at Rose Damu
56:05
Speaker 1: and you can find me Fran at France Squishco anywhere
56:08
Speaker 1: you want. Like a virgin is i Heeartradio Production. Our
56:10
Speaker 1: producer is Phoebe Unter, with support from Lindsay Hoffman and
56:14
Speaker 1: Nikki Iatore. See you next week, Visions. Bye,