Latest / Homeschool Revolution / Why Public School Is Draining So Many Kids
Transcript
- 0:00Welcome to the Homeschool Revolution.
- 0:02I'm Rebecca Stromsdorfer, homeschool mommified for over 20 years, and I've been coaching moms just like you for decades.
- 0:08I've done this messy, done it wrong, and figured it out as I went.
- 0:12This podcast is for the working mom, single mom, stay-at-home mom, and yes, dads too.
- 0:17Any parent who is done with the old way and ready to raise creative, confident kids who actually changed the world.
- 0:23This isn't just homeschooling.
- 0:25This is a revolution.
- 0:27Let's get into it.
- 0:34Welcome to my homeschool Village, Rebecca here, homeschool mom, two five children for 20 years, and a homeschool coach for over a decade now and happy to help you in your homeschooling journey.
- 0:45Now, I know it's mid May and nobody wants to homeschool.
- 0:48We don't either.
- 0:49We are finishing up our classes and then we're gonna be taking a month or two off while we do some vacations and hang out and do some fun things like everybody else is doing.
- 0:59But in the meantime, right now they're in voice, piano, banjo, and drum lessons.
- 1:04And so we've got to get those done.
- 1:06And today we were talking about high school options, like accredited versus not accredited.
- 1:12And do we really need an accredited curriculum?
- 1:17Do uh colleges here in the US require an accredited curriculum, all that kind of stuff.
- 1:21So I'm gonna do some summarizing here so that those of you who are wondering how high school and college works as a homeschooler, um, I can help you with that.
- 1:29So, number one, do you need an accredited curriculum?
- 1:34No.
- 1:35Guys, let me explain to you what accredited means.
- 1:38Accredited means they paid a crap load of money to put the name accredited stamp on their curriculum.
- 1:45That's it.
- 1:46So universities don't care.
- 1:48They do not care.
- 1:49I have called around.
- 1:50Go ahead and just like test me on this.
- 1:53Go call a university and say we are homeschooling and we would like to come to your university when our kids are done.
- 1:58Do we need an accredited curriculum?
- 2:00They don't care.
- 2:01I have yet to find a university who actually cares whether or not your curriculum is accredited.
- 2:06It's a rumor, you don't need it.
- 2:08It's a crap load of money to put into your um high schooler that you don't need.
- 2:12Number one.
- 2:13Number two, school is actually irrelevant.
- 2:16So here's how it works.
- 2:18If your children are homeschooled and generally more mature, so a child who's homeschooled tends to be less mature in the first eight to 12 years, and then all of a sudden they mature more and faster.
- 2:29And by 15, 16, they're kind of ready to start looking forward to where they want to be.
- 2:33They know who they are, they know what they want because they've had time to figure that out.
- 2:38So there are some who make them go through four years of high school.
- 2:41I find that to be an absolute waste of time.
- 2:43None of my children have done it, none of them have wanted to do it.
- 2:46Hi, Katie.
- 2:46Come on in, ask your questions as I'm going here.
- 2:48We're talking about homeschooling and high school.
- 2:51Um, what has happened is the colleges have dumbed down college so that more of the college students would do better.
- 2:58And because the general population of that age is not as smart as they used to be, colleges have had to lower the bar.
- 3:06So what's happening is children who are intelligent, hardworking, willing to learn something actually don't have to work that hard.
- 3:11So they can actually start college, hi May, can start college at 15 or 16 online.
- 3:18Now, I do not recommend you put your child on a college campus at the age of 15 or 16 with a bunch of 20-year-olds.
- 3:23No.
- 3:24You start online at 15 or 16.
- 3:27Now, this is only if they're college bound, okay?
- 3:29This is not all kids.
- 3:30If your child is college bound, you put them in college at 15 to 16 online, skip high school, go straight from whatever your junior highing, um, and then go straight to the universities at 15 to 16 years old or a trade, okay?
- 3:45Trades will also start taking kids at 15 and they can immediately start where they want to go.
- 3:50There are programs out there where your child, your homeschooled kid, can get a bachelor's before they're even 18.
- 3:55Did you know that?
- 3:55And if you're looking for those, you might want to make sure you're following me because I do share that information.
- 4:00Um, if they're college bound, you want them to be starting college at 15 to 16.
- 4:06Quit wasting your time on an accredited high school curriculum.
- 4:09Diplomas aren't necessary, GEDs are not necessary.
- 4:12And if you don't believe me, go call the university.
- 4:15Say, I'm a homeschool kid.
- 4:16What do I need to get in?
- 4:18You might need an SAT and A C T.
- 4:19Now, my homeschool village does have a program that prepares your child for those tests that are really, really good.
- 4:25Like if you want them to really score well on those, yes, you still have to take those as a homeschooler, but you don't need four years of high school.
- 4:32They love a homeschooler who's ready to go to college early because it means they're serious and they're gonna stick around.
- 4:37So you don't need an accredited curriculum.
- 4:40Number one, you don't need four years of high school to get into college.
- 4:43You don't.
- 4:43You can completely skip that and they can get right in or a trade school.
- 4:47Okay.
- 4:48Now, I'm not saying speed up their lives.
- 4:52They can start college at 15 to 16 and still be a 15 and 16-year-old socially.
- 4:57So if they're looking for social, you join my homeschool village, they can come take our life classes and be hanging out with the other kids and still preparing for SATs if that's what they want to do.
- 5:05But if they're college or trade-bound, start at 15 or 16.
- 5:09You don't need a high school curriculum.
- 5:11Now, I have one.
- 5:12If that's the road you want to take, I have one.
- 5:15Now, if your child is entrepreneurial based, there's no reason for them not to start as soon as they're willing to start doing some research.
- 5:22Now, I do have some entrepreneurial programs I do recommend that your children can go after, that they can learn from, that they can learn how to be an online entrepreneur.
- 5:30I have some of those.
- 5:30I also have resources if your kids are interested in AI and they want to be learning AI and what programs are good for them to be in and what programs are so great in AI for them to be in.
- 5:39And that's all stuff that we share inside my homeschool village.
- 5:42Hi, Tamara.
- 5:43Hi, Eleanor, Kelly, welcome.
- 5:44Tamra, welcome.
- 5:46Um, ask your questions.
- 5:47You guys, as you're coming in, go ahead and ask your questions.
- 5:49It's Rebecca here, homeschool mom to five kids, for over 20 years, and coach as well, to homeschoolers for a decade or more.
- 5:57So, high school options.
- 5:59So I gotta tell you, this is how I know all this.
- 6:02Okay.
- 6:03I have a brother-in-law who is a university.
- 6:05He teaches in both high school level and universities.
- 6:08Now he used to be anti-homeschooled.
- 6:10He's not anymore.
- 6:11After COVID, he was like, no, no, no, no, something's gone wrong.
- 6:14Something at COVID changed everything.
- 6:16He's like, something's gone wrong.
- 6:18And now um he came home one day.
- 6:20Hi, Tamara, hi, Tamara.
- 6:22He came home one day angry because they had just had a meeting at the university that basically told them that they were officially dumbing down the curriculum so they could get more kids to have more A's.
- 6:35And he was like furious.
- 6:37He's like, college is not even worth it anymore.
- 6:39And he's like, it's just become a joke.
- 6:42But if your kids want to be a doctor, engineer, lawyer, judge, right?
- 6:47Like there are things that they have to have a degree for.
- 6:49And if they're going for big stuff, I'm all for college.
- 6:52If you're gonna go where you got a nice return on investment, if your kid's gonna spend 50 or 100 or 200 grand on an education and make a hundred grand or more when they get out, by all means go college education.
- 7:06But I personally don't believe that if you're gonna make less than six figures, college is worth the investment.
- 7:10The return on investment is not good.
- 7:13Um, their trades pay better, especially if they go and get a bachelor's degree, maybe even on top of their trade, so they can get into management and running the companies.
- 7:21Trades pay a lot better.
- 7:22College degrees in our home are encouraged if you're going after something that's gonna bring in more than six figures a year.
- 7:29Otherwise, it's not worth the investment.
- 7:31Now, we also encourage entrepreneurship in our home, and so our kids are learning how to take their passions and turn it into a moneymaker.
- 7:39There are classes everywhere on how to do that nowadays.
- 7:42Your kids can be learning that at a very young age as soon as they're ready.
- 7:45So if that's the path you're looking at, make sure you're following me because I share those two, or you can ask in here and I can answer those questions.
- 7:52So ask your questions, high school questions, getting into college questions.
- 7:55I've had two children.
- 7:56Well, I've had one actually apply and get into college.
- 8:00And I had one that went to a trade school where she's a massage therapist.
- 8:04And I have um, sorry, that's kind of loud.
- 8:09I have one who is now currently serving as a missionary in Argentina and when he comes home would like to go into entrepreneurship.
- 8:16I have another child who's working on her own personal goals and has some dreams that we're learning how to pursue.
- 8:24And then the youngest is saying, maybe I want medical school.
- 8:27Now, if he does want medical school, I will be getting him into a program that gets him his bachelor's by 18.
- 8:34Why not?
- 8:35He will do it all from home.
- 8:36Um, and then when he's 18 and he's ready to go to the university, he will.
- 8:41He'll go get a master's while while those of his age are working on their associates and bachelor's, he'll be working on a master's degree.
- 8:47But he'll be doing it with his peers so that he's with other kids his age.
- 8:50Because I do think it's important once they hit about 18 to be getting them out in the world and you know, even earlier.
- 8:56Like my kids are out and about.
- 8:57Don't get me wrong, we're not secluded by any means.
- 9:01Um, although some days it might feel like it, but we're not.
- 9:06So, questions, questions about high school.
- 9:08Where are your kids?
- 9:10Are you worried about college, about getting them in?
- 9:12The world has taught us one way, one option.
- 9:18And in reality, there's a million, million ways.
- 9:22And you don't have to go through the system the way it's built.
- 9:24There's a ton of ways around the system.
- 9:27And that's really my specialty is showing homeschoolers how to get around the systems they think are the only way.
- 9:34And I show you different roads, routes, different ways that your kids can take that you can take to get an education, to make money, to become educated, to be financially free.
- 9:44Hi, Beth.
- 9:45All things that you can do for you and your family and moving forward.
- 9:49There's not a one-way, and there's not one size fits all.
- 9:52There's a million different ways to do this, and it's really about being innovative.
- 9:56It's about asking the right questions, it's about finding out what's really available out there.
- 10:02It's about asking the tough questions and finding out who really knows what they're talking about and who's just repetitive and saying what people have said but don't really know what they're talking about.
- 10:12May it's good to see you again, by the way.
- 10:14Carlene, thank you.
- 10:16I'm glad I'm helpful.
- 10:18What has been your favorite?
- 10:19Like, where are you with your kids right now?
- 10:21When you say wisdom, thank you.
- 10:23Um, what wisdom are you looking for personally?
- 10:25What is it that you need to know?
- 10:27I find that the hardest part about this homeschooling thing and all this new information is the fear of going outside the box because the box seems secure, right?
- 10:41Like get your kids all the way through high school, get your kids through college, follow the check marks because somebody planned it for us and we don't have to think too hard.
- 10:50And when you go and invent your children's futures with them, and I sit with them because I didn't do any of this alone.
- 10:56Like my second child was 16 when she came to me and said, Mom, I'm kind of done with all this high school stuff.
- 11:03Can I just go to college?
- 11:04And I was like, I don't know.
- 11:06Let's find out.
- 11:08And we did the research because that was the past she wanted.
- 11:12And so we followed it to see where it led, and that's how I found out what I know.
- 11:16Every single one of my children has said, Mom, I don't want to do what I'm seeing.
- 11:20Can I?
- 11:21And they've each come up with their own idea.
- 11:22And I'm like, I don't know.
- 11:24Let's find out.
- 11:25And we go and find out and we look and we research.
- 11:29And that's how I found out everything I know is because I didn't know.
- 11:33And one of my kids wanted something, and so we've figured it out.
- 11:38And really, that's the bottom line.
- 11:40The beauty of homeschooling is to be able to say, I don't know.
- 11:44Let's find a way.
- 11:45And just that tweak, instead of let's let somebody else decide for us, let's decide for ourselves and then do the research, has been so freeing.
- 11:54I had no idea.
- 11:56Um, May says we signed up last night.
- 11:58Yay! My girls are super excited.
- 12:00Such great information.
- 12:01Thank you so much.
- 12:01You are so welcome, and I'm so glad you joined us.
- 12:04So glad.
- 12:05Um, yeah, welcome.
- 12:07Carlene says, You're doubting yourself, believing I can do this.
- 12:09Your knowledge of your rights has taught me so much.
- 12:12Oh, Carlene, I'm so glad I can help you.
- 12:14Okay.
- 12:15Let's talk.
- 12:16Doubting yourself.
- 12:17Let me tell you right now, you're never gonna stop.
- 12:20Okay.
- 12:20If you wait until you stop doubting yourself, you'll never do this.
- 12:24You won't.
- 12:25You have to go forward with the doubt because it's the only way to get past it.
- 12:29Now, I'm past the doubt of whether or not this is the right thing.
- 12:33But I still have days when I doubt my abilities as a mother, and they will come and go depending on the phases of your children, and it's okay because every phase is new, and every phase you're like, I don't know how to do this phase.
- 12:44And you figure it out together, and that's the beauty of it.
- 12:47Uh, entering kindergarten, okay.
- 12:49This is perfect.
- 12:50If you never put them in the system, your life will be so much easier.
- 12:54So much easier.
- 12:56Okay.
- 12:58Let them play.
- 13:00And I was told this at the beginning, and I told other, and I was like, but my kids are brilliant.
- 13:05They needed to get started earlier.
- 13:06Hmm.
- 13:07Well, yeah, they're brilliant.
- 13:08But what play does is allows them their brilliance to grow.
- 13:12So I'm going forward now because you make us mama stronger.
- 13:18That melts my heart.
- 13:20Carlene, thank you for that.
- 13:22Thank you for that.
- 13:23That is my mission in life is to make mama stronger.
- 13:25Because in strengthening mom, the family is strengthened, and that's my joy.
- 13:29So thank you for that.
- 13:31You just made this whole life like worth all of it.
- 13:34Thank you.
- 13:35What help do you need?
- 13:37How can I help you be even stronger and take this on?
- 13:41Because the best thing I ever did for me was homeschool.
- 13:45I had no idea what it would do for me.
- 13:47I re-educated myself.
- 13:48I re-went through everything with my kids.
- 13:51I relearned and I gained a confidence.
- 13:54I never had school.
- 13:55I came out of public school thinking I was stupid.
- 13:58But I re-educated alongside my children.
- 14:02And then I came out going, wait a minute.
- 14:05I might have a brain.
- 14:06And then I created my homeschool village because I was like, more women need to know that they can do this.
- 14:12And so that's why I do what I do.
- 14:14You deserve it.
- 14:16Thank you.
- 14:16Oh, you're so, so welcome.
- 14:18Never stop posting.
- 14:19Don't plan to.
- 14:20I don't plan to.
- 14:21It's not easy, but I don't plan to.
- 14:24Katie says I learned so much from you about homeschooling that I didn't know before.
- 14:27It's been a few weeks watching you.
- 14:29Thank you.
- 14:29You're so welcome, Katie.
- 14:31I'm glad I can help.
- 14:32Hi, Jacques.
- 14:34Um, thank you.
- 14:35Thank you, ladies.
- 14:36What other help do you need?
- 14:38Like, this is your chance to get me one-on-one.
- 14:40What questions do you have?
- 14:41What fears?
- 14:42What's the one thing in homeschooling that just has you a little terrified?
- 14:46Or are you needing to convince a spouse?
- 14:49I had to do that.
- 14:50Um, what every mom, I don't care how long you've homeschooled, has that little fear, that little what if, that what if I can't?
- 15:00And that's when I come in and I can help with some of those answers because I see the end from the beginning.
- 15:06I'm at the end of homeschooling and I'm sad.
- 15:10I'm really getting sad.
- 15:12But I have five kids, three are on their own.
- 15:14Number four is gonna be on her own in the next year, and number five is like the easiest kid in the world because he was homeschooled by the older four.
- 15:23But I can see the benefits.
- 15:26I now get to see beauty.
- 15:29So just to share a little bit, this is for you moms, okay?
- 15:32For the moms who have the little kids at home, have you ever read the book Mars Needs Moms?
- 15:37If you haven't read it, you need to read it.
- 15:39You need to own it.
- 15:40You need to read it a thousand times.
- 15:41So Mars Needs Moms is one of my absolute favorite books because when I bought the book, or somebody gave it to me, I don't remember, it was like 12 years ago.
- 15:50And at the time I had a little boy who was going to be the death of me.
- 15:54And my goal in life, like I had two girls who were perfect and did everything right.
- 15:59And they were just the easiest things in the world to homeschool.
- 16:02And then came number three, and he was a boy, and he was rebellious, and he I could not keep him from breaking things.
- 16:07He did everything opposite his sisters.
- 16:09He was crazy, drove me crazy, drove them crazy, and was like bouncing off of walls.
- 16:15All of a sudden I realized homeschooling was not gonna be what I thought it was gonna be.
- 16:18And he was a tough kid and he knew how to push my buttons and he loved pushing my buttons, and we struggled.
- 16:23Turns out he was just like me, go baby.
- 16:25Somebody gave me Mars Meads Moms, and I bawled all the way through.
- 16:29All the way through, because it's this little boy who does not appreciate his mother.
- 16:32And at the very end, she gives his life for him.
- 16:35And it's beautiful.
- 16:37You'll cry.
- 16:38She doesn't end up dying.
- 16:39It's a beautiful kid story.
- 16:40My kids actually hate the pictures because they're like, it gives me nightmares.
- 16:45But yesterday, this son is 19 now, and he is in Argentina, and I miss him so bad.
- 16:52And he sent me the most beautiful Mother's Day present.
- 16:55A lovely, lovely little letter.
- 16:58And I cried, and my husband read it, and he laughed out loud.
- 17:01He's like, not the little boy that used to drive you crazy anymore, is it?
- 17:06Come on.
- 17:06He's like, it was so worth it.
- 17:09The days were tough with that boy, but oh my gosh, he is my best friend in the whole wide world now, and my biggest champion and my biggest cheerleader.
- 17:17And we are so close, and I adore that boy, and he adores his mama, and we are so close.
- 17:24And it was because of those hard days that, like, I'm not kidding you guys, there were days I would hit my knees and go, Lord, just let me keep him alive.
- 17:33If he just doesn't die on my watch, because the things he would do, I would be grateful.
- 17:40Those were my prayers some days.
- 17:42Lord, thank you today that he survived.
- 17:45And that he struggled, he had ADHD, he had dyslexia.
- 17:49He could barely write at the age of 17 because he wouldn't do it for me.
- 17:53All of a sudden, like overnight, he's writing every day.
- 17:58So that's what I can do for you.
- 18:00I show you the end from the beginning.
- 18:02I show you that the hard days pay off.
- 18:04I will show you your children do benefit from having their mother at home.
- 18:10You are raising your best friends.
- 18:12If you don't have great friends in your life, know that you are raising them and they will be your best friends.
- 18:16Carly says, We did, I am so nervous about putting too much info into iHib and quarterly reports and annual.
- 18:22Okay, don't worry about that.
- 18:23Don't worry about that.
- 18:25Should I actually have a video on this on YouTube?
- 18:27Go into my YouTube channel.
- 18:28Well, I show you how to fill it out with my homeschool villages curriculum.
- 18:31Um, don't worry about too much info.
- 18:34I can guarantee you they're not going through it all.
- 18:36They're doing a quick scan and they don't have the manpower for this.
- 18:39They're gonna do in a quick scan, make sure you fill it in and moving on.
- 18:42And the only time that you really need to worry about it is if like there's some form of abuse or legal battles inside your home, then they're gonna look at it.
- 18:49So I have been told if you're in New York, you do want to sign up for the HSLDA.
- 18:54Like, I never used to tell people if you're in New York, it's okay.
- 18:58Maybe.
- 18:58They're not even the HSLDA now is saying, if you're in New York, just sign up with us because they're getting weird over there.
- 19:04So um, it's like$15 a month.
- 19:06I would get in with HSLDA if you are in New York.
- 19:10It's the only state I say, oh, you're in New York, do it.
- 19:12It's the only one.
- 19:14Um one question was about how graduation works with homeschooling.
- 19:18However, I have learned the parents give the high school diploma.
- 19:20I was curious about a graduation ceremony, but I've seen depending on your location, there are groups that get together to do graduation ceremonies and photos.
- 19:27Yeah.
- 19:28So there are always groups in your states that'll do it.
- 19:31And if not, do one.
- 19:32Like a mom will just decide to do it for her kid.
- 19:35We threw a homeschool prom in our backyard.
- 19:38So we put out, like my daughters, they were a year apart.
- 19:41It was their junior, senior year.
- 19:43COVID had happened and it still things weren't back.
- 19:46So we decorated our backyard.
- 19:47We called it the barefoot prom.
- 19:49Bring your proms and come barefoot, but dress up and come barefoot.
- 19:53We had the best time.
- 19:54And we threw our own prom.
- 19:56And it was so cool.
- 19:57The kids loved it and it was clean and it was.
- 20:00Now I couldn't have done a graduation, but my kids didn't care.
- 20:03And none of my kids lasted till like at 16, they were all ready to move on.
- 20:06And they're like, I don't care about a ceremony, mom.
- 20:08Please don't make me do it.
- 20:10So we didn't worry about it.
- 20:11They did want senior pictures.
- 20:12They're all like, Well, my friends are getting senior pictures.
- 20:14Can I have some?
- 20:15I'm like, heck yeah.
- 20:16And so we did those.
- 20:16None of my kids needed a diploma.
- 20:19If at any time, I actually had one company, my daughter went to a private school for massage therapy, and they asked for her diploma.
- 20:27And I had to call them and explain to them that she was homeschooled.
- 20:29They're like, Well, we don't know how to do the homeschooling thing.
- 20:31And I was like, look, here's how it works.
- 20:33I explained it to them, and they're like, we're gonna have to have you talk to the owner.
- 20:37So I got on the phone with the owner and explained to him the homeschool laws that he was that he didn't get to do this.
- 20:43Now, he did say she's in massage.
- 20:45That's touching bodies.
- 20:46She has to be 18 when she graduates.
- 20:48I'm like, fair enough.
- 20:50But he's like, well, normally we require a diploma.
- 20:52I said, well, in homeschooling, we provide it.
- 20:53So I can just write it up for you.
- 20:54And he's like, oh.
- 20:56Well, then I guess it doesn't matter.
- 20:57I said, tell you what, give her the year.
- 20:59I'm paying tuition anyway.
- 21:01And if she's not your best student, then you can never have another homeschooler again.
- 21:05But if she is one of your best students, now you know who you want to start putting the word out to.
- 21:09He's like, fair enough.
- 21:10By the end of that year, she was the top student in the class, two years to three to even five years younger than everybody else.
- 21:17Um, aced it, did beautifully.
- 21:20And after that, he called me and he's like, You were right.
- 21:22How do I get more homeschoolers into my program?
- 21:24I'm like, ha ha, that's right, bud.
- 21:27So um, usually it's just about educating if anybody gives you trouble.
- 21:31I have had my children have been asked for their diploma.
- 21:33They've been asked for a diploma when they applied to a job, and they would just say, I was homeschooled, I don't have a diploma, but I'm happy to prove to you what my value.
- 21:41Just let me work for 30 days and you'll see that I'm worth my time.
- 21:44And that answer alone makes the employer go, Okay.
- 21:48So the right answer can erase a diploma.
- 21:51Like sometimes they just don't get it.
- 21:53They ask because that's what's done, but they don't understand that it's not really required or needed, and that, you know, my My kids will say flat out, look, I'm gonna be the best worker you've ever seen.
- 22:04So you can hire me with or without the diploma, but nobody's gonna work harder for you than I will.
- 22:08That gets me every time.
- 22:10Every time.
- 22:11Hi, Katie.
- 22:11Hi, Giselle.
- 22:13I think that's how you say that, right?
- 22:14Samantha's here.
- 22:16Does that help with the graduation ceremony?
- 22:19I'll be honest, if you're homeschooling with littles, they don't see the point.
- 22:24So I thought, I want my kids to have a graduation and a problem, and I want them to have this.
- 22:30They didn't know it existed.
- 22:31And then they go and watch their friends' graduation ceremonies.
- 22:34They're like, this is the stupidest thing.
- 22:37It's so interesting to see a child who wasn't raised in the system look at some of the traditions with new eyes and were like, huh, nah.
- 22:50My daughter went to the graduation.
- 22:52She had a bunch of friends who graduated as a senior.
- 22:54She'd already been a year into college, went back to the graduation with her friends and went, that was boring.
- 23:02I don't get it.
- 23:02And then went and did the same parties as with everybody else and hung out with them and whatever.
- 23:06And so she was like, for about two minutes, I felt left out.
- 23:09And then I realized I had a whole year of education behind me that they sort of just getting started on, and I was over it.
- 23:16So that was theirs.
- 23:18Now I don't know that all kids are like that, but it's been very fascinating to see my children, because I was public schools, guys.
- 23:26And I was like involved.
- 23:28I was class vice president and cheerleader.
- 23:32And I got into everything.
- 23:34And so my family was shocked that I would be the one to homeschool because I had the most fun in high school.
- 23:38But it's because I experienced those things, because I did all the popular stuff that everybody says was so important that I realized there was nothing in it.
- 23:48It was empty.
- 23:51I remember just being in the spotlight was a lot of pressure.
- 23:55And you get attacked, and it's not all it looks like.
- 23:59People hate you.
- 24:00People don't treat you well.
- 24:02You can try to be a little mispopular no matter what, but somebody will hate you for it.
- 24:06It was, I got my life threatened all the time.
- 24:09My house was egged.
- 24:10This was a 16-year-old girl who was just trying to do what everybody told her was the thing to do.
- 24:15And so having lived that side, I realized there was nothing to it that my kids would really miss out on.
- 24:20So when they did go through and didn't ever deal with that kind of pressure, their confidence, I didn't even know existed.
- 24:29Guys, I did not know children could be as confident as my kids are by just keeping them out of the system.
- 24:35Like, I'm as shocked as you guys.
- 24:37Like, I had no idea that kids could come out confident, secure, know who they are, know what they want, go after it, and not be swayed by outside opinions and ideas.
- 24:48That's what I learned by watching my children.
- 24:51They taught me.
- 24:53I had hoped when I started homeschooling my kids.
- 24:56I hoped that this would work out and I hoped that this would be the right path.
- 25:01And at the time I just didn't want them in the crap.
- 25:03I was just trying to save them from the ick I was seeing in the world, but I didn't know I was building a whole new set of wings.
- 25:09I didn't know existed.
- 25:10And they built them.
- 25:12I just protected their atmosphere.
- 25:14I protected their world so that they could become these beautiful little birds and angels I didn't know could exist in the world.
- 25:24And that has been absolutely mind-blowing.
- 25:29Mind-blowing.
- 25:30Like, and people almost don't believe me, but it's the more kids you meet that just didn't get put in the system, like your worst day at home is still better than the best day in public school, you guys.
- 25:40Still.
- 25:42It really is for you and your kids.
- 25:45But yeah.
- 25:46So tell me what you need.
- 25:48What other questions do you have?
- 25:49What other guidance do you need?
- 25:52Um, what do I need to pull out of my very long life of homeschooling that I can provide for you, help you with?
- 26:00Do you have a struggling reader?
- 26:01Do you have somebody who's dyslexic?
- 26:03Do you have an ADHD kid?
- 26:05Are you dealing with IEPs?
- 26:08We are bringing in a specialist.
- 26:10That's all I'm going to say.
- 26:13We have been interviewing IEP women who know homeschooling and IEPs intimately and can help a mom create an IEP inside the homeschool.
- 26:22Now, I believe that IEPs, by the way, individual education plan is homeschool.
- 26:27Every child deserves an IEP, an individual education plan, but there are kids who have more needs, and that is can be intimidating to a parent.
- 26:34My homeschool village, we're bringing in a mom who can help with that, can help you guide you, direct you, um, translate the IEP at school into a homeschool world.
- 26:45And she's coming along.
- 26:46Several women who now work for my homeschool village started uh just coming online with me and talking and sharing with me their strengths.
- 26:53Um part of my homeschool village is about, it's not about Rebecca.
- 26:59It's not about just the families, it's about bringing in women who have been called to more and giving them a place to give it.
- 27:12You have talents.
- 27:14You have something inside you burning.
- 27:17And my job says, is to provide a place for you to share your talents with the world.
- 27:25And that's what my homeschool village has become is we have moms come in and it's beautiful.
- 27:30I'll know I need a teacher for this, and then all of a sudden I'll meet a mom on one of these lives.
- 27:36And it's like, you're it.
- 27:37And it clicks and it works, and it's beautiful.
- 27:40And anyway, hi, Erica.
- 27:42But that's how the company's run.
- 27:44The whole company is run by homeschool moms who felt a call and approached me and said, I would like to come help you.
- 27:52That's a good thing I have a team of women running my homeschool village, but it is literally ran by the moms whose children are in the program.
- 27:58And so the feedback is from the moms.
- 28:01Everything's ran by the moms.
- 28:02It's beautiful.
- 28:03So I have five and I've homeschooled from the beginning.
- 28:07My oldest is 24.
- 28:08I have five kids.
- 28:09I've homeschooled for over 20 years because she started.
- 28:12I mean, if you go from her birth date, 24 years, 24 and a half years.
- 28:16Now, if you start from the age of five, 20 years, right?
- 28:20But let's be honest, it's not like at point when she turned five, I was like, and I'm a homeschool mom.
- 28:25No, I've been teaching that kid since the day she was born.
- 28:29So yeah, it's been 24 years.
- 28:32Um, homeschooling five.
- 28:34And I have been coaching other women for over a decade.
- 28:38I started, um even just a few years into homeschooling, I started helping other moms homeschooled because we were like needing each other so badly.
- 28:47And so we were teaming up together and helping each other out.
- 28:50And then I would have a friend like, I'm thinking about it, and she'd come in.
- 28:53And another friend, I'm thinking about it, and we'd talk and she'd come in.
- 28:56And so I have been like flat openly coaching other homeschool moms for 10 years.
- 29:03It's been a long time, which is why I see a lot of patterns that a lot of people don't see.
- 29:09I see a lot of what's really going on in families.
- 29:13I have seen a lot of pretty, I've seen a lot of ugly, but yeah, you're not gonna find very many homeschool moms out there who've homeschooled as long as I have and coached as long as I have.
- 29:23I know one or two, but they're not coaching.
- 29:27And usually they're joining me in my homeschool village and helping other moms.
- 29:30So my calling in life is to strengthen the heart of the home, which is the mother, so that she may strengthen the rest of her family, whether it's husband and children or just children, maybe she's single.
- 29:42Um, but my true goal in life is strengthen mom.
- 29:45Now I provide the curriculum for your kids.
- 29:47I provide the life classes for your kids.
- 29:49And part of that is to give you a break.
- 29:52Number one, to give your kids a great, excellent education where you know they're being educated well.
- 29:57Number two, while they're being educated well, they're learning to self-educate, they're learning independence, they're learning how to do things on their own, and you're getting a break.
- 30:06So if you're exhausted as a homeschool parent, you really need to come join my homeschool college because the whole purpose of it is to lighten your load.
- 30:14And that's what I've created because it was something I needed.
- 30:17Homeschooling is not easy.
- 30:18It is not for the week, guys.
- 30:20Homeschooling is not for the week.
- 30:22It's for those who are willing to try on a daily basis.
- 30:26You just have to show up, which can be the hardest part.
- 30:29Let's be honest.
- 30:30Mary says, I'm a single mom in my 50s, and I want to homeschool my 13 and 15 teen.
- 30:34But of course, they don't want to.
- 30:36But it's getting bad, and my son, that's 13-year-old, has battled with school and behaviors, and they just want to kick him out of school and they're exhausted, and so am I.
- 30:45That's pretty normal for that age.
- 30:47Um, and you have to ask yourself.
- 30:51I mean, at those ages, they should have some opinion, but you're still the mom.
- 30:55And this is one of those moments when I advise to you is hit your knees.
- 31:00What is best?
- 31:01Stand your ground.
- 31:02If you're feeling like you need to be homeschooling them, then that's what you need to do.
- 31:09I've told my kids when they're my kids have all gone through a bit of a rebel stage, and one of them in particular, and I remember looking him straight in the face as he was rebelling against everything we did.
- 31:18And I could see it in his eyes, this fire of you can't make me in his eyes.
- 31:21And I looked him straight in the eye and I said, I will fight for you to the death, even if you're the one I'm fighting, but I will not let you fail.
- 31:32And he looked at me and he softened.
- 31:35And he was like, he knew Smama was not backing down.
- 31:41And um, he tells me that was one of the changing moments of his life to find out.
- 31:46When your child knows that you will fight for them, even if they are the ones you're fighting, that's power, and that's what they will love, and that's what they need to see.
- 31:56Is their mother fighting for them?
- 31:58Even when they're the ones you fight.
- 32:00Does that help?
- 32:02And if you need help with them, come sign up with my homeschool village.
- 32:04We have a lot of kids in the ages that are struggling, and then they come in and do our classes and love them.
- 32:10Hi, Tamara.
- 32:12Uh, I've been falling for a short time.
- 32:13Do I need other curriculum if I join your homeschool group?
- 32:16No.
- 32:16We have everything you need.
- 32:18Everything.
- 32:19The group, the support, the curriculum, and life classes.
- 32:22You really don't need anything.
- 32:24Yeah.
- 32:24I got everything.
- 32:28Now that there are like things that we'll recommend, like make sure you buy this book, you'll want that, or things like that.
- 32:33But yeah, we have a curriculum you need.
- 32:35Been that way since K7.
- 32:37Then pull them.
- 32:39What do they say?
- 32:40The sign of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
- 32:44If you pull them, which I highly recommend, honestly, they're gonna need therapy because trauma happens daily in public school, and they've been dealing with trauma for a very long time.
- 32:57So your 13 and 15-year-old will need therapy.
- 33:00If you can get some through a church, through something where you can find it cheaper.
- 33:04De school, which means you need to give them some time without a like tack where they can disappear to be bored, to find out who they are, what they want.
- 33:14Your focus at 13 and 15 should not be reading, writing, math, getting them into college.
- 33:18It should be who are you?
- 33:21What do you love?
- 33:23If you had freedom, what would you want to pursue?
- 33:27Let's find your talents.
- 33:30Let's go and see museums for fun.
- 33:34And the whole purpose is to discover who they are, what they love.
- 33:39You work on healing of the brain and the body.
- 33:41You work on making sure they're getting enough protein and a good diet, because I can guarantee they're not getting that as cool.
- 33:46You make sure they're getting enough sleep.
- 33:47Because a 13-year-old boy, my 13-year-old son right now is sleeping 14 to 16 hours a night because he's growing and he's grown a foot in a year.
- 33:57So a 13, he needs to grow.
- 34:00And he might just come home and sleep for a few weeks.
- 34:03And that's okay.
- 34:04Because as his body's growing, his brain will catch up later.
- 34:08So bring them home.
- 34:10This is what I would do if I had your kids.
- 34:11I would bring them home.
- 34:12I would let them sleep for like two weeks.
- 34:16Or whatever they need.
- 34:17And then I would start to just go do things with them and let them find safety again.
- 34:25Just work on how to provide safety for them because they don't know what it is.
- 34:30The kid in public school doesn't know what safety feels like on a daily basis.
- 34:34He refuses to talk to anyone.
- 34:35We tried it, and 13-year-old has ADHD.
- 34:37Okay, and this is normal.
- 34:38So my son, who's been homeschooled his whole life, has been going through this right now.
- 34:42Typical 13-year-old behavior.
- 34:44Okay, we do have a therapist for him.
- 34:45He meets weekly with a therapist.
- 34:47Luckily, our church pays for it because that could get expensive.
- 34:51Um, he has a therapist every week and has helped a lot, but we do let him sleep like crazy.
- 34:58Didn't sleep good since he was little.
- 35:00Yeah, because he goes to school.
- 35:02And if he can't sleep, can't think, his emotions are whacked.
- 35:07So you have to start with his health.
- 35:10Forget about academics for a year.
- 35:12Like I would give him a year off of academics and focus on his health, proteins, sleep, especially because if he's not in a gross spurt, he's about to go through one.
- 35:22And you've got to give room for the gross bird.
- 35:24So start doing your research on 13-year-olds and what they really need.
- 35:27There's a book called Happy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.
- 35:30You need to be reading that for your teens.
- 35:32They need as much sleep as a newborn.
- 35:35Did you know that?
- 35:36A teenager who's going through gross birds and puberty needs as much sleep as a newborn, but yet we don't give it to them.
- 35:43So there's a book, Happy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, on Amazon.
- 35:48Get it.
- 35:49Read it.
- 35:50Then go do research on what a child of that age needs scientifically for their body and mind and focus on those.
- 35:58Because a child who is not in good health cannot be taught.
- 36:04But a child who feels safe, secure, and is healthy cannot be stopped from learning.
- 36:10Hi, Lisa.
- 36:11Okay?
- 36:12So you've got to make sure that his body and mind heal.
- 36:16Give him that time to heal.
- 36:18Get him safe.
- 36:19He needs to know because the trauma he's been through, think of it as like serious PTSD.
- 36:24We underestimate the PTSD, the stress we put our kids in through public school, the constant bullying, the constant anxiety they live in.
- 36:35You bring them home, you've got to get that regulated.
- 36:38Whether he needs medication, whether he needs therapy, whether he needs the right diet and exercise, more sleep, you as the mother, pray about it.
- 36:47Learn it, do the research, figure out what your each child needs, get them mentally, spiritually, physically healthy.
- 36:56If you can do that, their minds will take off on their own.
- 37:00And then it's hard to keep up.
- 37:02But if you don't do that, nothing you teach will get in.
- 37:05Nothing.
- 37:06And this is the problem they're having the public school systems.
- 37:08They teach academics before brain and body.
- 37:12And that's why they can't.
- 37:13They'll never succeed.
- 37:15It's like his brain don't shut off.
- 37:16He's smart, but grades don't reflect.
- 37:18Okay.
- 37:19Then he's going to be an entrepreneur.
- 37:21Okay?
- 37:22Um grades don't matter.
- 37:25They don't matter.
- 37:26And he might just be an entrepreneur.
- 37:29And a kid with a brain like that and who gets it focused in the right direction, he'll just be rich.
- 37:35Enjoy that one.
- 37:37He's a hard one to stubborn, but thank you for your I got a couple of those too.
- 37:42And um at about 17 he grew out of it.
- 37:46Finally, he quit sleeping all the time.
- 37:47He grew up and he was like 6'2.
- 37:50And then all of a sudden he was starving.
- 37:52Like a bear who woke up, ate everything in the house, and then at 19, all of a sudden he grew up and he became a man overnight, and it's beautiful.
- 38:00But the teen years are rough with those boys, I will tell you.
- 38:04I'm glad I got on here.
- 38:05Hi, Lisa.
- 38:06My two granddaughters are going through this right now.
- 38:07They are 13, 14.
- 38:09Oh, uh-huh.
- 38:10Uh-huh.
- 38:11That is a rough age for all children.
- 38:13Guys, all children.
- 38:14And sometimes it's okay to like lay off academics for a couple of years.
- 38:19Yes, years.
- 38:21Because their bodies, brain spirits, just focus on those things.
- 38:27And maybe all they learn about is puberty and what their bodies are doing.
- 38:30Maybe you do some biology because that's what they're learning.
- 38:32That's what they're, you know.
- 38:33Students.
- 38:34Teach them to take care of their bodies.
- 38:36That will be the best education you could give them.
- 38:38And then when they wake back up and they come out of all this silly stuff, they'll be interested in other things.
- 38:46Trust that God created children who want to learn.
- 38:50Because He did.
- 38:51He created these beautiful spirits who want more, who want progress.
- 38:55But the world is built to just smash it.
- 39:00And so we're fighting against the teaching to smash potential.
- 39:05Hi, Samantha.
- 39:06Hope that helps.
- 39:07And I know it's hard to believe what I'm saying, but I have lived this five times.
- 39:11Five times.
- 39:13Yeah.
- 39:13I am not shocked the public school is trained them.
- 39:15And can you imagine?
- 39:17Just put yourself in your kid's spot for a minute.
- 39:19You gotta show up.
- 39:21Have you ever tried to hang out at a school for the day?
- 39:25And the chaos and the requirements.
- 39:29Like if you were as a parent went and just sat in your child's chair for the day.
- 39:34Sit still, don't go to the bathroom unless you're told, and now you gotta announce to everybody you gotta pee, right?
- 39:40So the pressures, eating bad food, being told what to do all day, sitting at a desk, what parent could put up with that anymore?
- 39:50Not one of us.
- 39:51And yet we expect children to do it.
- 39:54It seems abusive.
- 39:55Why are we expecting of our children what we would never do anymore for ourselves?
- 40:01Like, would any of us have picked the public school system if we had a choice?
- 40:05Any of us?
- 40:07No.
- 40:08Had I known back then, had I been given a choice, so wouldn't have chosen public school system, but that doesn't mean that there's not better ways to be educated.
- 40:16They can still be educated.
- 40:17It just has to be done differently.
- 40:19But yeah, public schooling is training.
- 40:21Guys, I have a friend who, um, her kids were all in school, and she was telling me one day, she's like, I have all this time on my hands, and I thought about maybe going and volunteering at the school to see how I can help.
- 40:30She said, I went for a whole day there, and I was like, oh my gosh, I cannot stand this atmosphere.
- 40:34I don't want to be here anymore.
- 40:36And I left.
- 40:36I said, Hold up.
- 40:38You don't want to spend one day of volunteering in a public school system in the exact same school system you send your children to on a daily basis.
- 40:45Well, no.
- 40:46You don't see anything wrong with that.
- 40:48She's like, huh.
- 40:50No.
- 40:52I do.
- 40:53If I'm not willing to do it, they shouldn't be forced to either.
- 40:56That's how we played.
- 40:58Not sending them back next school year.
- 40:59Yay! Keeping them home.
- 41:00I've seen too much this year.
- 41:02Lisa, high pride.
- 41:06High five.
- 41:07Use the summer to de-school, to play, to work on the body, the brain, right?
- 41:12Spirit.
- 41:13Work on those things.
- 41:14Just use the summer for that.
- 41:15Don't worry about the curriculum until fall.
- 41:17Just enjoy it.
- 41:19Just work on healing.
- 41:21Healing.
- 41:22All about healing.
- 41:23Let him do that.
- 41:25Okay, guys.
- 41:26So I'm gonna go.
- 41:27Thank you so much for being here, and I will see you inside the village, if you're a mess.
- 41:33And if not, that's okay.
- 41:34We will see you again later.
- 41:35All right, have a good one, guys.
- 41:37Thanks.
- 41:39That's the wrap for today.
- 41:41I hope you're leaving with something real, something you can actually use.
- 41:44This is a long game.
- 41:46You don't have to get it all right today.
- 41:48Just show up tomorrow.
- 41:49That's enough.
- 41:50If this episode helped you, share it with another mom who needs it.
- 41:53And if you're ready for a village to do this with, find us in the show notes.
- 41:57Until next time, keep going.
- 41:59The revolution starts at home.