Latest / More Than Before / Be All In. Be Real. Be Bold. — Tim Novak

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Be All In. Be Real. Be Bold. — Tim Novak · More Than Before

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Hey, you need to get real with who you are, not what everybody
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else wants you to be. I had to make a decision.
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Are you going to get all in to the commitment that you made to
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your wife? Are you going to get real with
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who you are and start dealing with who you really want to be
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in life? You're going to be bold enough
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to live through those decisions. I wouldn't be here hadn't
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somebody seen something in me that I didn't see in myself.
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Hey everyone, welcome back. I am so excited for my next
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guest. For more than 4 decades, my
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guest today has built leaders, grown organizations, and helped
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thousands discover what it means to stand out in authenticity.
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He's a Maxwell leadership faculty member, also a Maxwell
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leadership coach, a best selling author, a devoted husband of 46
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years, and he's truly someone that believes that real
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influence comes from being all in being real and being bold.
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Tim Novak, welcome to the program, my friend.
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How are you today? Oh my gosh, I'm doing so well,
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Nathan. It's a pleasure to be here.
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And we won't let my wife watch this recording because anytime I
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tell people how long we've been married, she's like, Oh my gosh,
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why did you do that? Don't ever do that again.
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Which is funny to me because your wife looks younger than
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you. And as I as I've seen you like
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when you start going through some of your history of how many
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kids you have and you have grandbabies and I'm like, how do
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you have grandbabies? You're not old enough to even
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have kids. I don't think you look so young.
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So we. Started we started young.
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We started young when we didn't know what we were doing.
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And you know, it was, it was cool as we, as we kind of
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progressed with our kids, we're like, hold it, by the time
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they're 20, what we're going to be like, we're still young,
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which was really, really cool. So for us, it was like we, we
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just kind of happened into it that way.
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It wasn't something strategically we did.
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Well, I like, I like that you say that you were young and
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didn't know what you were doing versus you were old and thought
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you knew what you were doing. I think, isn't that kind of how
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it works nowadays? Because I, I feel like I know a
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lot of parents that are older or they're starting to become
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parents and they're older and they're saying, I know what I'm
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doing and then they get into it. They're like, I have no idea
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what I'm doing. I have no idea whatsoever.
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Absolutely. So Tim, where did you grow up?
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You, you grew up in Oklahoma, right?
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Yeah, I grew up in Oklahoma, born in Oklahoma City.
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My dad worked for General Motors, Pontiac and we travelled
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a lot. So we, we, we, we travelled.
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I lived in Oklahoma City, Amarillo, all over northern
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Texas, then moved to Houston. So kind of all around the the
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Midwest. That's cool.
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So you, so you did travel just a little bit around the Midwest.
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What was what was childhood like for you?
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My parents and grandparents, they were hard workers, my
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grandparents were farmers. And one of the things that was
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impressed on me at a very early age is that you were going to
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have a job doing something. And we all started.
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I had, I had two brothers and a sister and I think we were all
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working by the time we were 10 years old at something, doing
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some kind of job, working to earn some kind of pay to help
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help pay for the things that we wanted.
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So they were really focused on work ethic and hard work as
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young kids. What was the job that Tim found
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himself in most the time around the farm?
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Oh my gosh, for me, I, I tried to get away from the work around
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the farm as much as possible, especially when it came to
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milking cows or something. So I think my, my grandparents
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got me a, a 410 shotgun and it was like anytime I could get out
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and go in the woods and be alone and do some hunting.
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That was my, my primary objective back then.
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But. What kind of what kind of
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student were you growing up? So to tell you the truth, I
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really, you know, growing up, I didn't have a lot of self
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esteem. In fact, I didn't, I didn't make
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real good grades when I was a young kid, didn't have a lot of
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friends. I was one of these kids that was
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a little more introverted sensitive.
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I was a kid that, you know, athletically I was pretty
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talented, but relationally I didn't have a lot of self
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esteem. So school was a challenge for me
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in elementary and junior high. It got better as I got to got to
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high school. But growing up as a kid, I
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really, I really didn't have a lot of direction, a lot of self
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esteem. Who were some of your earlier
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mentors when you were growing up, like the people that really
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poured into your life that you recall?
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Who were those people? And maybe what were some of the
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lessons that they instilled in you that still to this day, you
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look back and you go, man, I, I remember learning that by seeing
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this. Yeah, You know, I don't know
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about you, but I, I had grandparents that were
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interested in my life. So I spent a lot of time with my
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grandparents. And on my dad's side, my my
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granddad worked for a private Country Club.
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And that's where I got interested in golf as a young
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kid. And I would go to work with him
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during the summer. I'd go stay with him during the
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summer for a few weeks and I got to watch him work with people.
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He was the head of all the maintenance crew.
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So from an early age, he showed interest in me and I got to
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watch him and observe him with people that he was working with
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everyday. And, you know, I don't know if
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you know much about private golf courses.
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A lot of discipline has to happen at golf courses to keep
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them in shape, especially in a part of the world where it's hot
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and dry. So a watching him really it, it,
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it bonded us as a relationship, made me want to be him, be with
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him. And then, you know, I wanted me
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to or help me really want to emulate a lot of the things that
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I observed in him. What did you, what did you find
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yourself doing in your off time when you were a kid, or maybe
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even actually even more? I'm curious, what was what was
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the dream? What did you, what did you dream
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about when you were a kid, Tim? So, you know, I, I was one of
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these kids because I had been exposed to working at something
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as a kid. I probably had 20 different jobs
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by the time I graduated high school because every summer I
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was, you know, I'd had to get a job doing something.
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And I really didn't have a lot of dream like I'm going to be
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this, I'm going to do this. It was more of I'm going to work
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at something and what I work at, I'm going to be better than
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anyone else that works at that job.
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I had a morning paper route when I was in junior high.
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Had to get up back then you had to fold the papers, rubber band
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the papers, 3/30, 4:00 in the morning, and then you had to
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walk them or ride on a bike to your home to drop those papers
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in the middle of the night. Amarillo, it's super cold during
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the winter. So what I would do is rather
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than throw the paper. And I know for some of you,
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getting the paper today is like, Oh my gosh, do they still do
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that? And.
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For those of you that don't know what a paper is, it's what they
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used to print the news on in ink and then and then it would be
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delivered to the door by usually a small child.
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So I would lean that paper up against the door so that all
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they had to do was crack it in the winter because it would
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snow, it would be super cold outside.
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And my way of serving them was I would lean that paper up to
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where all they had to do was crack the door, reach down and
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grab it. So that type of service to me as
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a young kid, I didn't have so much as a dream as what I wanted
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to do. It was like, I don't know what
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I'm going to do next, but what I do next, I'm going to be better
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than anybody has ever been in that job before.
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So my tips were bigger, my loyalty was bigger.
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And when I came to collect my payment, because back then you
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had to go door to door to collect your money, I got paid.
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So every job I had, I'm just telling you, Nathan, every job I
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had, we sold Donuts door to door when I was a young kid.
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That was my first job with my brother.
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And we'd go pick them up at the donut shop warm.
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My mom would keep them warm in the oven and we would run as
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fast as we can from house to house selling them while they
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were still warm. And people were like,
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absolutely, we'll take warm Donuts at our door on a Saturday
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morning, Saturday morning at 8:30.
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So again, I didn't have a lot of dreams.
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But what I did know is that I was going to figure out a way to
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be better than the best at whatever I did.
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So in any job I had, whether it was washing cars, working at a
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service station, that's kind of what my dream was, was I'm going
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to find a way to master this, to stand out.
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So for me, that was kind of how how I grew up and I didn't have
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a lot of friends. Like I said, I didn't have a lot
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of self esteem. And I say that because even
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though my dad set a lot of expectations for us when it came
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to work ethic, he was an alcoholic.
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And when you, when you live at home with an alcoholic, you
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don't know what you're going to get when they come home and, and
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it might be a good night and it might not be a good night.
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And you can tell just from the way the door is opened, the door
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is shut. So I kind of grew up in a family
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that kept their mouth shut, but we worked hard.
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I'm curious who were, who were the people early on in your life
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that instilled entrepreneurship in you?
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Because there's there's two kinds of people that I meet.
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There's people who they, they love their job, they want to
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work their job and then they want to go home and do something
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with their family. And then there are the other
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people that say I want to do something crazy.
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To them, it's not crazy, but I want to do this and I want to
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work 80 hours a week and I want to go to sleep late and wake up
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early to do this thing that I love.
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And I want to make this my career.
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The entrepreneur. Who was it that instilled
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entrepreneurship in you? Well, again, I, I think the, the
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role models I had from just watching my parents work hard
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and their emphasis was take whatever you're doing to the
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final step, because if you do take it to the final step, there
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can be bigger wins for you. So I wasn't chasing someone.
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What I was doing was just putting in practice what they
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saw and, and, and how they were guiding me.
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And as a result of that, dude, I came out, I came out of school
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going, I'm going to be able to run circles around other people,
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not because I'm more talented them than them, but just because
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I'm willing. I'm willing to do more, be more
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than most people want to be. And you know, we see a lot of
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that today, right? Yeah, we see a lot of the
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opposite of that today is that they want all those benefits.
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But when it comes to putting in the the effort to to get it a.
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Little less. A little less, right?
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Yeah, which is funny because we were talking about that before
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we even started. The idea of, you know, it does
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take more to have success and to have something look good or to
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do something well, it it does take more.
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It doesn't take a lot more, but it does take more.
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I'm curious what happened after high school?
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So you graduate high school. Where does Tim go from there?
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So, so I, I started a relationship with my now wife
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when we were in high school. And again, I was a hard worker
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and I think a lot of the things that attracted to her was I had
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a checkbook. In fact, in fact, she said as
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we, as we got older and we were still dating, you know, she's
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like, hey, you've got, you got Girl Scout cookies, you got Thin
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Mints in the freezer and you've got a checkbook.
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I'm latching on to you right so. That was.
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That was what so even in that relationship that I had with her
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for several months and a couple of years, I was still, I still
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didn't have a lot of vision of what I wanted to do.
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I was going to be good at what I was working at and provide a a
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regular income. But it really wasn't until about
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8 months in to planning a wedding that I learned about
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leadership and I learned about entrepreneurship and I learned
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about everything. It was 8 months in to planning
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our marriage. She had the dress, she had the
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invitations and I got cold feet. I've been hanging around with
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guys after work, having a couple of drinks, listening to them
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talk to me about why do you want to do something stupid and screw
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up your life and get married? You'll never have any more fun.
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And the more I hung around him, I started thinking, you know,
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you guys are right, right? I didn't have a lot of self
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esteem, I didn't have a lot of mentors in my life, so I was
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very influential. And the more I hung around them,
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the more I started thinking you guys are right, man.
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So one night I met with Julie and gave her the it's not you,
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it's me speech. And I canceled the wedding.
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And it, it, it, it was devastating.
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I mean, if you think she took that well, you'd be, you'd be so
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wrong. It was devastating for her and
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her family and you know it. It only took, I don't know, a
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week or two for me to figure out how bad I screwed up.
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So naturally I did what any guy would do.
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I've I called her up and begged for forgiveness and suggested we
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elope the next week. That's funny.
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And I recall, I recall her bringing you home at one point
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and her there was there was a moment between you and her dad
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that was pretty impactful. What?
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What was that that her father said to you that kind of shook
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you at your core, realizing that something needed to change?
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Yeah, it was really interesting. You know, first of all, on that
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call, she said yes to eloping. The next week after we had been
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planning a wedding for a couple of years, and I called it off.
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So we got our marriage license, and we stopped by our house to
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pack her bags and break the news to her parents.
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Now let me just tell you my relationship with her parents at
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that point, especially her dad. I wasn't at the top of his I
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like this guy list. It's probably slightly strained.
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He was a little bit strained. In fact, I think they were
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probably in shock when we showed up and broke the news and said
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we're here to pack her bags and we're going.
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We're going to get married in the next couple of days.
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And oh, by the way, you guys are invited to come if you want.
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Now think about that. He set me down around the
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kitchen table and he asked me several questions that night.
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And I'll never forget three questions he asked me said, will
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you put God first in your life? Will you honor Julie with your
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life? And when you have children, will
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you raise them at a godly home? And you know, when the guy wants
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a girl, what's he going to say? You know, I mustered all the
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conviction I could to say yes, yes and yes, right?
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I answered yes to those questions.
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We got married, my mom's house. I can't believe that we got
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married, my mom's house. Spent the night at a hotel in
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downtown Dallas. Drove home the next day and she
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went back to high school and she was still in high school and I
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went to work. It was it was absurd.
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And she called her dad about 3 weeks later and said crying,
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saying Dad, I want a daddy. I want an annulment.
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Tim's not the guy I thought I married.
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I was still hanging out with those guys after work.
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I hadn't changed the thing. And she saw it and said, I'm I'm
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out of here. I want I want an annulment.
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I'm done. And he said, you're not coming
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home. I'll call Tim.
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That's where I learned about leadership.
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He said, you remember when we were sitting around the kitchen
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table and I ask you those three questions.
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He said, you're at a crossroads in your life right now.
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I'll never forget it. You're at a crossroads right
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now. One path leads to success and
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sustainment. He said The other path leads to
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default and failure. He said, I'm challenging you to
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get all in. Put God first in your life,
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honor Julie with your life and when you have children, raise
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them in a godly home. And then he said 6 words I'll
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never forget. He said I know you can do it.
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Had I not been on that call, hit that moment.
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His challenge to me to get all in to my decisions and not what
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other people wanted me to be. That changed my life for him to
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say, hey, you need to get real with who you are, not what
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everybody else wants you to be. In that moment in my life, I had
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to make a decision. Are you going to get all in to
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the commitment that you made to your wife?
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Are you going to get real with who you are and start dealing
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with who you really want to be in life?
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And then are you going to be bold enough to live through
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those decisions, whatever happens?
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So in that moment, that really defined who I was going to
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become. And I'll tell you even today, my
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father-in-law, had he not been in my life, I wouldn't be on
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this call with you today. I wouldn't be doing this
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podcast. I wouldn't be here.
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And somebody seen something in me that I didn't see in myself.
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So that is you want to talk about who inspired me?
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Now you put all that work ethic with somebody that got
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challenged to get all in the everything I'm going to do in
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life from that point forward looks different.
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Whether it's my faith, whether it's my family, whether it's the
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work that I'm doing, whether it's the relationships that I
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have. So that has that has been more
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that in has influenced me than any any talent OR skill that I
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could have acquired. When did, when did that belief
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change from I know you can do it, hearing your father-in-law
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say that to you, hearing it from yourself and saying, I know I
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can do this. When did?
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Because there's, there's this, there's a point I think in life
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where we don't have the belief and someone believes in US and
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then we're challenged to go out to meet the the challenge that's
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in front of us. And at a certain point it,
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there's it, there's, it's like a switch.
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It goes from someone else's believing in me.
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So I can do this too. I actually believe in myself to
20:17
be able to go and do this. Now the, the belief has changed.
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Like I, I like to tell people, you know, borrow my belief until
20:24
you have your own. When did your belief become your
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own? Well I love that question.
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Great question. I think the belief became my own
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over time, but it started with an action.
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Now for me it was you need to reverse course.
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You need to reverse course right now, starting today.
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So for me it was OK, what does that look like?
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What action is that? Well, the first thing is I had
20:51
to make a decision that I wasn't going to put myself in the
20:54
environment with those guys. Now, that didn't mean that I was
20:58
going to treat them bad and I couldn't be friends with them,
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but I was not going to do some things.
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I was going to take an action. And through that action, I
21:06
started seeing the benefits. So for me, the hey, what was it
21:12
that built that belief? It was OK.
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I acknowledge that I'm definitely going to put some
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things in place that are going to be different than I was doing
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before. So as I stepped away from those
21:23
guys and I stepped into, OK, well, if I'm, if I'm going to
21:28
take that challenge on and he said, put God first in your
21:30
life. First of all, I wasn't a
21:32
believer at the time. The first thing I had to do was
21:34
sit down and, and, and work on the communication with Julian,
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say, OK, what is this going to look like going forward?
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We're going to get involved in church.
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I'm going to take that step. I don't know what it looks like,
21:46
but I'm going to take that step. And as I did, I started to see
21:49
the benefits of, Oh my gosh, our relationships started getting
21:52
better. Things started happening that
21:55
we're like, Oh my gosh, I've had no idea this would happen.
22:01
So for me, it was more of acknowledging it, embracing it,
22:05
but then taking action and through those actions is what
22:10
helped me believe that I could do it.
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It was kind of like, it was kind of like when I made the decision
22:18
to step out of one role I had into a leadership position.
22:23
And again, I didn't have a lot of self esteem.
22:26
I didn't have the ability to stand in front of a group and
22:28
talk to them because you know, growing up, I'd rather been shot
22:32
than give a book report and be in be in front of a class.
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But pushing through and taking action on practicing things like
22:44
that, the action is what helped build the belief for me because
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I don't believe someone can tell you now there's people of faith
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that like, hey, yeah, I'm going to speak over you.
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And all of a sudden that's the way you are.
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For me, it was OK. First of all, I can't believe
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that you did what you did. And you know what?
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You are right? I need to reverse course and I'm
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going to put some actions in place.
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That's what helped me. You're a, you're a learner and a
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lot of that comes from situational pieces of your past
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of, you know, having a father who battled alcoholism.
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It's true that there there's a learning moment of learning
23:29
really energy in the room. A a, a mentor we both have had
23:33
has said that the, you know, when you walk into a room and
23:35
you've, you've been around those types of people, you very
23:38
quickly see who people are in a room and you're able to read a
23:42
room, which is why I think people that go through that
23:44
become incredible salespeople. And you're no different than
23:48
that, which is fascinating to me.
23:50
You, you started a business early on in life, Matt Co, I
23:57
believe, and you not only started, but you truly did
24:04
finish. You were you were caring for
24:09
1700 franchising owners across the United States, which is no
24:17
small feat. How do you go from managing your
24:22
own to being able to lead A-Team so big and to being able to meet
24:29
those needs? Yeah.
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Well, first of all, yeah, looking back on that, it's like,
24:35
Oh my gosh, how did that happen, right.
24:36
My grandmother loaned me the money.
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Now I had good work ethic, right?
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My grandmother loaned me the money to start my own business
24:44
when I was in my young 20s. And she did that because she had
24:48
seen my work ethic and whatever I did, whatever job I happened
24:51
to have. And, and again, applying what
24:55
I've been talking about today to what I did as a, as a
24:58
distributor selling automotive tools for Matco Tools over 5
25:03
years, I advanced faster in my business than most people.
25:07
And what happens when you do well in sales, They want to put
25:10
you in a management leadership position and you can just teach
25:15
everyone else on your team how to do that.
25:19
And within the first six months, I realized that I didn't have
25:24
any leadership skills. I could sell.
25:28
I had that work ethic, but none of my guys would listen to me.
25:32
They wouldn't, they wouldn't do what I told him to do to be
25:35
successful. And and that's when I had a
25:38
discussion with Julie and said, hey, these guys are they're
25:43
wacko. I'm I'm going to quit.
25:45
I'm going to go back doing what I was doing.
25:47
They won't do what I'm telling them to do.
25:50
I remember that discussion very distinctly in our kitchen.
25:54
And she looked at me and said, yeah, you could, you know, you
25:56
could always go back to doing what you're doing if you're not
26:00
happy doing that. Or she said you could change
26:01
your strategy. And I started looking for books
26:07
on leadership. And that's when I found John
26:10
Maxwell's book, Developing the Leader Within You.
26:12
So you say, you said, hey, you're a learner.
26:16
I think what, what saved me then was that I was looking to learn
26:23
how can I become a better leader six months into getting that new
26:28
role. And I heard John in that book
26:30
say you could go back, but he goes, you got to find a way to
26:33
get them to do it because they want to do it, not because
26:36
you're telling them to do it. And that struck such a chord
26:41
with me. It was like, OK, how do I do
26:44
that? How do I get people to do things
26:46
that I, they, they might not see are important for them, but
26:51
they, they want to do it not because I'm telling them to do
26:55
it. So then it was like, OK, game
26:56
on, new strategy. I'm going to figure out how to
26:59
do this. So you you say something often,
27:06
which is be all in real and bold.
27:10
Which of those 3 has been the hardest for you to wrestle with
27:14
in life? Well-being all into everything I
27:17
do is the easy part. It's like once I'm committed to
27:19
something, I get fully in or I'm not going to do it.
27:23
OK, Probably for me it's that big being real part.
27:27
OK, now we've all we know. John Maxwell's written a book,
27:30
Real Leadership years ago, Relationships, Equipping
27:35
Attitude, leadership. For me, the biggest challenge,
27:39
and when I think about real leadership for me, first of all
27:43
is responsibility. That's been very easy for me
27:47
because if I'm going to be all in, you got to be responsible,
27:50
you've got to be committed. And then the next is excellent.
27:55
And we could talk for a day about being excellent because
27:58
most people in life are average and we've heard John talk about
28:01
average people. Most people are average.
28:05
But for me, if I want to be a real leader today, I got to be.
28:10
I've got to be responsible and excellent.
28:12
The third piece of this has been the hardest for me, being
28:15
authentic. I think being authentic has been
28:18
one of the biggest challenges for me because my early mentors
28:23
were my father-in-law. He was a full time speaker.
28:27
One of his best friends was Zig Ziglar.
28:31
He introduced me to Zig Ziglar when I was in my first
28:34
leadership role and really got me focused on developing my
28:38
speaking skills. So you want to think about, OK,
28:42
I've worked on developing my speaking skills for years
28:46
because I had mentors like my father-in-law, Zig Ziglar.
28:50
I learned from Earl Nightingale, Norman Vincent Peale, all people
28:55
that a lot of you that are listening into this probably
28:57
have never heard about, but they were masters at speaking in
29:02
public. So when I first started learning
29:04
how to speak, I was more authoritative.
29:09
I was modeling what I saw versus really being authentic to who I
29:15
am. For fear that hold it, you can't
29:16
be authentic. That's a sign of weakness.
29:19
You can't show people your true colors.
29:21
You can't talk about the things that you have really, you know,
29:25
struggled with in life and screwed up in areas of life.
29:28
So for me, over time, being more authentic is still something
29:33
that I'm working on today. I still get in front of
29:37
audiences and there's times where I don't connect and I've
29:44
had to stop and say, listen, I'm going to stop right here.
29:47
I'm apologize, I'm apologize right here.
29:50
I'm not connecting with you. So we're going to stop right
29:54
here and I'm going to ask you a question and I want to hear from
29:59
you. So for me, that authenticity
30:02
side has been the biggest challenge I I've faced because
30:07
again, responsibility is easy for me.
30:10
It's a muscle memory. Being excellent now is like a
30:13
new challenge with anything I'm going to do.
30:14
How do I be excellent it it, how do I be unforgettable in
30:20
something? If I think on that level, then
30:23
that's like stretching in any any environment.
30:28
It is interesting because a lot of people, I, I think a lot of
30:31
people when they think about authenticity, I think
30:35
specifically with men, I think a lot of men when they hear the
30:38
word authenticity, they think weakness.
30:41
And I, I, I would challenge most men that think that way because
30:47
there is something about authenticity that makes you
30:50
stronger, not just stronger of like saying, you know, hey, this
30:54
is where I'm weak and this is where I'm great, or this is
30:57
where I've failed. But there is a level of
30:59
authenticity where you do get real with yourself so that you
31:02
can improve, so that you can get better.
31:04
And I've said it before, you know, I, I truly believe that
31:08
transparent lives transform lives.
31:10
That if I'm transparent with you on what's going on in my life,
31:13
it gives you an opportunity to say, you know what?
31:15
This is what's going on in my life too and having that ability
31:19
to connect with people really does help.
31:22
How has authenticity helped you to open doors?
31:28
How is how is that muscle of working that even though it
31:31
might be maybe a scary thing at times of going 0, this is this
31:35
is maybe an area of weakness or where I fumble the ball
31:37
somewhere. How is that open doors for you
31:41
and helped you in your career to be more authentic?
31:44
Well, I again, I think you're exactly right.
31:49
Guys think or men in general think if I'm, if I'm too
31:56
authentic, it's a sign of weakness.
31:58
Well, leadership is not what it used to be.
32:01
Leadership is so much different than it is today.
32:04
They want leaders that are really real with who they are
32:07
authentic and that show value in other people.
32:11
So I think the thing that's open most of the doors for me, there
32:16
is a question that I ask most groups that I work with, and
32:19
I'll start with that question from the beginning because I
32:22
want to connect with them very quickly.
32:25
And it's if the world could describe you in one word, what
32:30
would you hope that it would be? And when you ask people that
32:35
question and give them a minute to think about it, generally
32:39
they'll go pretty deep with you right away and you'll find out
32:44
something about them. In fact, if you ask that
32:47
question in a group, you're going to find out probably
32:50
something new about that group that you might not have known
32:53
because you ask them, hey, if the world could describe you in
32:56
one word, what would you hope that it would be?
32:59
Not what you want it to be, but what would you hope that it
33:02
would be? And then tell me why that's so
33:04
important to you. And if you're listening to this,
33:10
I would challenge you to think about what is the word that you
33:14
would hope the world would describe you to be?
33:16
And then how well are you living that out in your life today?
33:21
If you did nothing more today than to start living out the
33:24
word that you hope the world would describe you to be, you're
33:27
going to be become more of that every day.
33:30
So that for me has that relationship, what that's done
33:35
to connect quickly with people and build relationships.
33:38
I can stop in and visit a client I haven't seen in four months
33:43
just to say hi. And just because of that
33:45
relationship and that depth of relationship, it doesn't matter
33:49
how long we've been together or been apart.
33:51
I we feel like we've known each other forever.
33:55
And as a result of that, they're like, hey, we were just thinking
33:58
about you. We need to get you back in here.
34:02
We need to get to get you back in here to speak to our group
34:04
again. Or you know what we've been
34:06
channeling, We've been channeling what we learned from
34:09
you with our team. That's the kind of stuff that's
34:13
helped open doors for me. The leadership lessons, the
34:17
training and all of that. That's important.
34:20
But the relationship that I've worked to build with them
34:23
initially by asking them a few questions to get to know them
34:27
has done more for me and my my the what I'm doing today then
34:32
probably anything. I want to ask you an odd
34:37
question that's a follow up to what you were just saying.
34:40
And I, I, I went through this exercise a long time ago and I
34:43
I'm curious what your answer will be.
34:46
If you were to describe yourself as a color, what color would you
34:49
be and why? How does that color represent
34:52
you? Well, in the world today, a
35:01
chameleon is not a good word, right?
35:05
Yeah, because the chameleon changes, changes colors.
35:10
You know, you can look at my background today and probably
35:12
see what my favorite color is, if you were to think about that,
35:15
right? Blue is a calming color.
35:18
So if I was to answer your question directly, I'd say, hey,
35:22
blue is probably my color. And I like blue because it's a
35:25
calming color. But in reality, I can adapt to
35:31
any color today. And I think that's that's part
35:35
of it as leaders is it doesn't mean that you conformed
35:38
everything. It just means that hold it
35:39
regardless of the color. I'm going to find a way to
35:43
connect whether you're a color is blue or green or orange or
35:48
bright red. You know, my wife's color's red.
35:51
It's bold. It's big and bold.
35:53
And there's times where I'm like, hey, let's just chill.
35:56
My color is my color is blue. Let's it's earlier, right?
36:01
So for me today, I'd say in reality, yeah, blue is my
36:06
favorite color. But being a chameleon and being
36:10
able to connect well to any of those colors is my my priority.
36:19
I love it so much. I love it because because as I
36:23
was thinking about it before I even asked you a question, I was
36:25
like, I feel like you're the color for you is like blue
36:28
because like you're kind of cool.
36:30
Like not like, not like cool is like retro like.
36:34
Hey, you're cool, man. But more of like, you're cool,
36:37
you're collected, you, you bring a, a refreshingness to
36:43
conversation. You bring a refreshingness to
36:46
interactions and I think, I think it's 100% the color that I
36:52
would, I would say that you are in fact, as you were talking, I
36:55
was like, well, blue is also a primary color which I'm
36:58
relearning right now with my kids.
37:01
So you know, you have three primary colors and blue is one
37:03
of the primary colors. And when you mix blue and red
37:08
together, you get a beautiful purple and you get you get a
37:11
royalty color. And between you and your wife,
37:14
like you can either be cold or you can be burning hot, but
37:19
together you get this beautiful, serene moment when you're able
37:23
to balance the color out. So I, I, I don't know, I, I, it
37:27
definitely was a random question, but it, it came to
37:29
mind. I thought, you know, how, how
37:31
cool is that? As you talk about the word that
37:33
describes you, you know, I think it's a really good challenge for
37:36
all of us to think about that. What is the word that we want
37:39
other people to remember us by? What is the word that would
37:44
signify our life and who we are? And there's so many different
37:48
ways that you can go about it, but I love that idea of, of the
37:51
color. Now, what are the things
37:54
Speaking of like color and authenticity and and being real?
37:59
One of the things I love about your story, you've had so much
38:02
success. You truly are a successful guy.
38:05
You've everything you've put your hands on, you've worked
38:09
hard to make it successful. And what I think a lot of people
38:13
would be surprised by is the fact that you don't have a
38:18
college degree. And I think it's amazing because
38:22
I think some of the smartest people I know don't have college
38:25
degrees because they're people that go out, they find
38:28
information, they apply information, and they're
38:31
continually growing because they know that information is the key
38:37
in a application to becoming better.
38:40
I'm curious, you know, for me, you know, I graduated from
38:43
college, but even with me, I go, oh, I only have a bachelor's.
38:48
I don't, I'm not really that smart.
38:50
I didn't, I didn't, I don't have a doctorate.
38:52
I'm not a doctor or a fill in the blank.
38:55
Sometimes that can get in the way for people that they feel
38:59
like I don't have the accolade. I don't have the right
39:02
certification to do this or to to do that.
39:05
Obviously, if you're going to be a brain surgeon, we want you to
39:07
go through school, but I'm curious how, how do you, or how
39:12
have you been able to overcome a belief like that?
39:16
Because with the amount of success that you have, I would
39:18
imagine that you've gathered tools around along the way that
39:22
have helped you and saying, you know what, the, the formal
39:26
education thing isn't the most important thing.
39:28
It's, it's, it's this other piece.
39:30
What, what would you say to the person that wrestles with that
39:32
identity piece of why I don't feel like I'm enough.
39:34
I don't have enough to to move forward.
39:37
Nathan, I think that's such a good question.
39:39
And I think from my perspective, and I'm not going to speak for
39:43
everyone, I would think that there are a lot of people that
39:47
don't push through and get some type of a degree have questions
39:53
about what the impact is going to be on my professional career,
39:58
positively or negatively. I think that's just a question
40:01
that happens and especially if you're getting hired, whether
40:05
that's going to be a derailleur. As you as you move ahead in
40:08
life, Well, first of all that yeah, that's that's impacted me
40:15
throughout my career. As far as in my head, my
40:18
mindset, and I'll just say most of it is mindset because all of
40:24
us can learn a skill, but working the stand out and get
40:33
noticed, not to be show your ego, but to really put your
40:39
effort in to stand out, to get noticed, to be above average.
40:44
For me, what impacted it the most was when I got in those
40:48
situations. As an example, I joined Maxwell
40:52
Leadership to get access to more leadership development tools
40:55
that I didn't have to bring in myself.
40:57
And at through that process, I realized that, Oh my gosh, I am
41:01
passionate about leadership, but I could do this outside of the
41:04
company that I've been working at for 36 years.
41:09
And the question was, why would you want to do that when you've
41:14
spent 36 years at this organization, you're at the top
41:17
of your income potential, you're at the everything insurance
41:22
benefit, all that stuff. Why would you do something
41:24
stupid and start a business from scratch and leave all of that
41:30
behind? Well, that passion is what
41:32
pushed me and the fear of can I do this?
41:35
I don't have a degree. It was the people that I brought
41:37
around me that helped me and encouraged me during that time.
41:41
And I'm going to tell you, for me, it was having people around
41:44
me that I could watch and see, oh, they did this.
41:46
I wasn't even thinking about what degree they might have,
41:50
where they came from, their pedigree, all of that.
41:52
It was just, I watched them, but I brought people around me that
41:56
could encourage me and I just took the steps and I applied
42:01
what I've done in life, which was I'm going to find a way to
42:06
be responsible, to be excellent at this.
42:10
I can remember sitting down with John Griffin and saying, you
42:14
know what? I don't know if I can do this or
42:16
I don't know if I'm ready. And I think that's one of the
42:18
questions a lot of us have is, are we ready for this and can we
42:22
do this? But again, it's for me, it was
42:26
taking the action because when we step forward and do things
42:31
that are Even so far outside of our comfort zone, we find a way
42:35
to make things happen. So for me it was and, and again,
42:41
I don't know that there's any amount of education that could
42:46
help me make a decision to take the next step.
42:51
Now, logically, I might be able to rationalize that and say, you
42:54
know what, what are the odds of this being successful and
42:57
calculate all the data and all that stuff.
43:00
But in reality, it was taking action and following through.
43:07
So for me, again, I've had those thoughts.
43:11
I still have those thoughts like, hey, where would I be
43:14
today? Hadn't I not done, you know, had
43:17
I done that, well, I might not be right here.
43:19
I was certainly wouldn't be right here right now.
43:23
But I've accomplished more than I could have ever imagined in
43:26
life, primarily because of the choices and the actions that I
43:30
took. And there's been failure along
43:33
the way. You know, it's, it's really
43:35
funny because as I was, as I was listening to you, one of the
43:38
things I, I just realized, I don't know why it's taking me so
43:41
long to to realize this, but we all make at least, well, the
43:46
majority of us make one decision that we think that we know the
43:50
outcome, but we don't really know the true outcome, which is
43:53
when you get married, we, we all think of this is what it's going
43:57
to be. It's going to be amazing.
43:59
She's going to love me. He's going to be awesome.
44:01
He's always going to smell that way.
44:03
She's always going to smell that way, right.
44:06
Like there's, there's this, there is a grand thought of what
44:09
it's going to look like. And then you get into it and
44:12
then you have the choice of whether or not you work towards
44:15
it, to make it, to make it work, or you choose to give up.
44:19
And life is like that, especially within business,
44:22
especially with an entrepreneurship, you know, you
44:25
have to be willing to step out into something to actually learn
44:30
how to do it in many respects, 46 years, which Julie, don't
44:34
kill me if you're ever listening to this.
44:36
I'm just saying it for reference.
44:38
But 46 years is a long time, especially in the world that we
44:43
live in today where very few people are committed for that
44:47
long. I'm curious, how have you, both
44:51
you and Julie, been able to create intentionally such a
44:56
strong relationship that has gotten you to 46 years, 3 kids,
45:02
6 grandkids? How what?
45:04
What was some of the key elements in your relationship
45:09
that you guys worked on to get you to that point?
45:12
Yeah. Well, again, another great,
45:15
great question for for me, the word or the thought is that we
45:20
made a conscience decision. Now what that means is just like
45:27
her dad on that day that called me and challenged me, I had to
45:30
make a conscious decision that I was going to get in, be real and
45:37
be bold to move through whatever life's challenges throughout us.
45:41
So in the midst of 46 years and a lot of challenges, and I'm
45:46
sure there will be more challenges to come, is we have
45:50
made a conscience decision. That means that we don't let a
45:53
problem get so large that it's going to be a deal breaker.
45:58
And like in anything in life, communication is critical.
46:01
We work together as well, which it makes it even at more of a
46:05
challenge at times, but it also makes it more of a, a gratifying
46:11
at times when you work together and you're doing something
46:14
together, especially if it's focused on a great 'cause it, it
46:20
brings your bond together. But for us, it's a conscience
46:23
decision every day that we are committed.
46:28
Again, we're, we are modeling. And I think for us it's like,
46:33
hold it, there's not a problem that's too tough that we can't
46:36
get through even if we need help.
46:40
And I think, I think that's a big part of it is there's not a
46:43
problem that we can't get through.
46:46
And if we need help, we're OK getting help to get through
46:49
that. Does that mean that we're always
46:53
going to feel good? No, there's a lot of times we
46:59
don't feel good, but we are committed to push through.
47:05
And that happens in a relationship.
47:07
Those of you that are married know it's not about you.
47:12
It's, you know, it's about us and there's times where that's
47:16
really hard. But I think for us, the the
47:19
reason we're together today is because we made a conscious
47:22
decision early on that there was going to be nothing that we
47:25
couldn't get through. I love it because making that
47:29
conscious decision is truly important that you're going to
47:34
work things through no matter what.
47:36
I, I, I think that's, that's a, that's a thing that's lost in
47:39
relationships today. Now there are, there are times
47:42
where you have to be able to step back and go, maybe this
47:45
isn't a good situation with where you are.
47:47
There are there are those moments.
47:48
But I will say that the majority of times that I meet people,
47:53
they're not willing to do the hard work and the hard work.
47:56
A lot of times from your perspective, for me, it's being
48:01
able to die to self meaning I'm, I'm going to take my pride and
48:04
I'm going to I'm going to walk out the room and I say, OK, so
48:07
let's meet in the middle here and let's talk about things.
48:09
You and your wife have done some amazing things.
48:13
You, you both being the Co founders of Christian Youth
48:16
Theatre in Austin, helping really impact people through
48:23
art. I'm curious.
48:25
You have grown up around music. Music is a is a big thing.
48:30
You're you're a great guitarist and not only that, you have also
48:36
invested in other people's musical careers.
48:40
I'm curious, why is music such a passion for you and how has that
48:45
shaped the way that you see the world?
48:47
Oh my gosh, I started playing guitar when I was in high school
48:50
when I had a buddy and I went to one of their shows that were
48:54
playing at their talent contest or something.
48:56
It's like, Oh my gosh, I got to do that, right?
48:58
So OK, you know the background, I jumped in.
49:01
The next thing you know, we're playing clubs all over Houston
49:05
and and then you get married, OK.
49:08
For me it was like, no, I can't play clubs anymore.
49:12
It was like, OK, well if you're going to you're going to be all
49:15
into your relationship and in the right crowd.
49:18
For me, it was like, OK, we're going to we're going to play in
49:21
the band at church. So that's kind of what happened
49:23
for us. And music was a big part of our
49:27
life. My wife was in theater in high
49:30
school when I met her. So for us, music has always been
49:34
a part of our life. And and when we start having
49:36
kids, it was like, OK, you're going to learn to play an
49:39
instrument. Which one would you like to
49:41
play? Let's just test and see what
49:43
happens. So they all became musicians.
49:46
Hopefully no. Dramas.
49:47
Yeah, yeah, yeah. They all became musicians.
49:50
And then the next thing you know, we're, you know, we're
49:52
doing a von Trapp family musical review for churches when when we
49:59
visited our parents, right. My wife had them all singing him
50:03
in the in church when they were like 234 and 5 S kind of started
50:07
that way. And my wife's always had a gift
50:10
with kids. You know, you just, you see
50:12
people that are like, Oh my gosh, they're just naturally
50:14
gifted to that. So, so yeah, we, we, we're,
50:18
we're passionate about music and the arts and we visited our
50:23
daughter-in-law that happened to be working for a theater in the
50:27
Bay Area and we just loved it. And we hadn't heard of CYT.
50:32
And there's some Cy TS across the US.
50:35
Well, we, we started one in Austin.
50:38
They didn't have one in Austin 10 years ago.
50:40
So we work with kids 8 to 18 and really helping develop them as
50:47
young leaders to be able to be bold, to stand in front of a
50:52
crowd and speak and perform with confidence and authority.
50:58
So it's been a it's been an incredible blessing to us to be
51:02
able to to steward that as well. But music has just been
51:07
something for us that's always made a big impact in our life.
51:11
I love that. And I, I love, I love the fact,
51:14
by the way, if you guys are watching the podcast, you can
51:16
see the guitars in the background.
51:18
I I would imagine that those aren't, those aren't like the
51:20
books that you see and, you know, people's, you know, frames
51:24
when you're watching the videos. Like he actually plays those.
51:27
Yeah. People ask me all the time.
51:29
They're like, hey, dude, hey, do you, do you do, do, do you play
51:32
those? And it's like, you know, I don't
51:34
know about you. Have you ever been in someone's
51:36
house and they've got guitars hanging on the wall and you go
51:38
like if you, if you, if you, if you're position or play it and
51:43
you run your finger across and it's like, Oh my gosh, I don't
51:46
think that's been tuned in a few years so.
51:48
It's usually my thought is oh that person hasn't loved that
51:51
thing in a while. Exactly.
51:53
So for me, it's like a pet peeve.
51:55
Do I get to play them all the time?
51:56
No, I'll, I'll, I play randomly today.
51:59
But when you walk in my office, if you were to run your hands
52:02
across any one of them, they're in tune.
52:06
They're in tune. So that's my, that's like one of
52:08
my things that's like, hold it. If I'm going to play my guitars,
52:11
one way I do it is making sure they're all in tune.
52:13
So it forces me to sit down and play my guitar.
52:18
For a few minutes. Well, I love that because the
52:21
other funny thing about that is it, it reminds me so when I when
52:26
I was graduating from high school, my, it was high school,
52:30
it was college. My, my grandmother passed away
52:33
and I ended up I ended up taking her inheritance that she gave me
52:38
and I ended up buying a really nice guitar.
52:40
And till this to this day, I can still tune that guitar and eight
52:44
months later, if I touch it, it's still in tune.
52:46
So. That's a good guitar.
52:49
It's a good guitar when it stays in tune, but I, I, I have really
52:53
loved our time. You know, there there are a
52:55
couple more questions that I want to see if we can try and
52:57
get to because there are some really wonderful things about
53:01
your story. If you've been listening right
53:03
now and you say, man, I love what Tim is talking about.
53:06
I really relate with him. Maybe you want to learn more
53:09
about him. I want to encourage you to go
53:11
learn more about Tim and what he's doing.
53:13
You could visit his website timnovak.com or you can go to
53:16
realleadershipdevelopment.com. Both 2 great places that you can
53:20
connect with him. But not only that, he's got 2
53:22
amazing books. I want to focus on one of them
53:25
really quickly though, because it's it's coming out pretty much
53:27
any day, which is Remarkable influence.
53:31
Remarkable Influence is going to be a spectacular book.
53:33
And if you've listened to Tim for any amount of time on the
53:36
podcast today, you know that he has a great amount of influence
53:40
that he's billed over his life. And I think that there are some
53:43
really key pieces within the book that when it comes out,
53:47
you're going to want to get it because it's going to help you
53:49
to really be able to relate with other people, to influence other
53:52
people to to be able to connect on a different level.
53:56
But Tim, I want to ask you the first of all, what was what was
54:00
the heart behind wanting to write this book?
54:03
Because your first book was all about sales.
54:05
This book is all about influence.
54:07
Why? Why was this book on your heart?
54:09
To bring it to the world. Well, it's basically the story
54:14
I've been telling you today. You know it.
54:17
It is my story and it starts with that getting all in it.
54:22
It the story of where I learned about real influence was after
54:27
canceling a wedding I've been planning for eight months.
54:30
So I am super excited about this book because it it's my story.
54:37
It's the things that have impacted me.
54:40
It's what I've built some of my signature messages about when I
54:44
go keynote or train organizations.
54:47
And I've been testing this out for the last year.
54:51
Not that we don't have stories that we we use all the time, but
54:56
specifically this content that that I'm I'm writing about here.
55:01
I've been using this within organizations for almost a year
55:06
now. So it's like it.
55:07
I got to tell my story. I got to talk about what?
55:10
What's it mean to get all in? Be real, be bold.
55:13
I love it. Make sure you grab a copy of
55:15
Remarkable Influence. It's out there on Amazon.
55:19
The last question I want to ask you here, Tim, you, I like to I
55:23
like to focus in on this idea of being more overdoing more.
55:29
And I'm curious for you, when you hear about other people that
55:33
they want to do more in their life, but they just don't feel
55:36
like they're enough, what do you speak to them?
55:40
What would what would be something that you could say to
55:43
encourage them to take a step today into really stepping into
55:47
who they were created to be? And I'm curious also, what does
55:51
it mean to be more than before to you?
55:55
Yeah, well, that again. You've asked some great
55:59
questions here today and grateful to to be able to talk
56:03
about this one. You know my word and I didn't
56:09
ask you what your word is and I'd like to get that from you
56:11
before we leave. If I'm sure something popped
56:14
into your mind, my words influential and why that's so
56:19
important to me. It's because I believe in every
56:22
engagement that we have. And if you're listening in, it
56:25
doesn't matter where you're headed the Today, whether it's
56:27
morning or evening, you're listening to this.
56:30
The first relationship, the first person that you're going
56:33
to contact, the first person that you're going to talk to
56:36
you. You have the ability to kind of
56:39
make that a wow moment or not a wow moment in the way that you
56:47
initiate that conversation, in the way that you respond to that
56:51
conversation. And if you are more intentional
56:54
about that, you will be more maybe in the way you greet
56:59
someone. So if it's a phone call, hey,
57:02
it's great to talk to you today. Oh, hey, if it's one-on-one,
57:05
hey, it's great to see you today rather than just, hey, how you
57:07
doing, what's up, what's happening?
57:10
You can make an impact on people.
57:12
For me, influential means that in every engagement, live
57:15
virtual phone, I'm going to work to not impress, but I want to
57:22
validate the people that I'm with.
57:24
I want to engage with them and I want to set the tone for
57:29
whatever that engagements going to be.
57:31
So I would just encourage you to be more intentional about your
57:37
relationships, your conversations, the work that
57:40
you're doing today. What would that look like for
57:42
you to be a little more intentional about it and working
57:48
at maybe raising the bar a little bit?
57:52
So for me, influential's the word.
57:55
And in any engagement, hopefully on this call, I have influenced
57:59
someone to do something that might be a little different.
58:02
Maybe it's a conversation they need to have that they haven't
58:05
had. Maybe it's an action you need to
58:06
take. Maybe it's a decision you need
58:08
to make that you need to make a complete 180 and go the other
58:11
direction. Like me hanging with the wrong
58:13
crowd. So, Nathan, how about you?
58:15
What's your word? I love that you asked it and it
58:19
you're right. And when you were talking about
58:21
the word, there was a word that came to mind.
58:23
It was the word authentic. Authentic is a word that I
58:27
absolutely love because even even before we started our
58:32
conversation this morning, recording it, one of the things
58:35
that you said was Nathan, you had this ability just to talk
58:38
with people and it it's just a real conversation.
58:41
And that's something that I always desire.
58:43
It's always something that I want.
58:46
It's really easy to walk into an environment, especially with,
58:49
you know, influential people, big names, where people want to
58:54
come across as always professional with their guard
58:57
up. Everything has to look pristine
58:58
and good and what I want people to have when they interact with
59:03
me as an understanding that I truly love them.
59:05
I care them. I care for them, but I care for
59:08
the real story, the real story of who they are, the good
59:11
things, the bad things, the challenging things.
59:14
And at the end of my life, I want people to say, you know
59:16
what? Nathan was an authentic guy.
59:19
It didn't matter what was going to know my life.
59:21
I could go to Nathan and I could tell him and not only would he
59:25
hear me and would he encourage me, but he was there just to sit
59:30
with me. And that's, that's one of the
59:32
things that I, I love about this exercise, the exercise of
59:37
defining. What is the one word that you
59:39
want people to say about you? What is the one word that you
59:43
want people to walk away feeling when they have an interaction
59:47
with you? I want to encourage you that if
59:49
you have listened today and there is a word that has popped
59:53
off when either Tim or I have been talking, do you say, man, I
59:57
think that's my word. Challenge yourself.
59:59
Is that a word that you're living into today?
1:00:01
Tim, this has been such an incredible time.
1:00:04
I know that so many people listening right now have gained
1:00:07
in, they've gained influence. An understanding of how to
1:00:11
influence people at A at a different level, but not only
1:00:13
that, a greater understanding of who they were created to be.
1:00:16
Which is the entire goal of why I do the More Than Before
1:00:19
podcast. It was such a pleasure getting
1:00:21
to spend time with you. For all of you listening, if
1:00:23
this episode added value to you, which I know it did, share this
1:00:26
with a friend. Leave a review, subscribe so
1:00:30
that you never miss one of the transformational conversations
1:00:32
like today. Until next time, remember to be
1:00:34
more, see more, and experience more than before.