Latest / Terri Messenger's Genius Zone / The Sacred Journey of Loss & Transformation

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The Sacred Journey of Loss & Transformation · Terri Messenger's Genius Zone

• 0:00
  Tell me about the power of what you teach around awareness.
• 0:07
  Yeah, what I teach is the process of the stages of grief
• 0:15
  and also being aware and of their body, that and their
• 0:22
  emotions. And as far as emotions go, what
• 0:26
  their emotions are. Give them the name, acknowledge
• 0:30
  that you're going through these particular feelings also as far
• 0:36
  as your body goes, if you need to cry, this is a cleansing of
• 0:42
  your body. And also if we withhold
• 0:47
  expressing these emotions and your body will let you know,
• 0:52
  you'll have headaches, you'll be lack of sleep, lack of eating
• 0:56
  your stomach. And just like the book from
• 0:59
  Bandan where he says the body keeps the score, yeah, score of
• 1:05
  anything that you do not let go of release.
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  So releasing crying is part of the releasing.
• 1:14
  And that does help you let go of a lot of things that you are
• 1:18
  retaining from expressing. And when we don't express
• 1:23
  things, they will come back to haunt you in your body.
• 1:33
  Hey and welcome to our weekly show on The Genius.
• 1:39
  Sorry and I have to say that I am most honoured and privileged
• 1:45
  to be letting this beautiful lady into my home here where I
• 1:52
  am in WA. And this lady just so happens to
• 1:57
  be a Master NLP practitioner. She is a certified coach for
• 2:06
  grief, yoga instructor. She also is certified in
• 2:11
  Thanatology and that is another based grief.
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  And she also is inspired by great people such as Elizabeth
• 2:22
  Kubler Ross and David Tesla. And I have been listening in to
• 2:27
  some of David's podcasts lately. This is going to be on grief,
• 2:32
  something that we all get touched within our lives.
• 2:35
  Nobody is going to be spared from it.
• 2:39
  So with no further ado, thank you, Ada Malave for joining me
• 2:44
  on the show. And whereabouts are you in this
• 2:47
  wonderful world? Thank you, Terry, for having me
• 2:51
  here. Yes, I am on the island of
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  Puerto Rico. I'm in the Caribbean and I got
• 2:58
  warm. Sun is coming up.
• 3:02
  Oh, how exotic, how exotic. I love that.
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  The Caribbean, that is so amazing.
• 3:09
  What can I say, when I met with you, it was after my husband
• 3:14
  passed away and I am doing grief very differently to what I
• 3:21
  expected. And I'm also doing grief way
• 3:25
  that is so different to other family members.
• 3:29
  And there are elements of this that I'm very curious for and to
• 3:35
  know about. So I am so looking forward to
• 3:39
  this broadcast. But I guess I'm just going to
• 3:42
  preface this a little bit. Grief is not a weakness.
• 3:45
  It is not something to fix. It is love with nowhere to go.
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  What's your take on that? Totally, yeah.
• 3:57
  It's not something to fix, just as anything in life that we go
• 4:02
  through a process and it's just going through the process.
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  We we don't need to fix anything because we're not here to fix
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  anything. Our purpose life is just to
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  process and go through and hopefully have a wonderful life.
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  And I think it's David Tesla that talks about it being like
• 4:25
  love. When you love and you've loved,
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  then you lose and that person passes away.
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  And then there is that there's this love with nowhere to go.
• 4:40
  So I'm sure that you know, you yourself, you've lost people in
• 4:45
  your life, but significantly, you've lost your father in 2012.
• 4:51
  And then you obviously watched and endured with your own
• 4:56
  family, your daughter's husband spend dying cancer at the age of
• 5:03
  30. That must have been such a
• 5:06
  shock. How much of that inspired you to
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  move into the work that you're doing?
• 5:15
  Yeah, that totally inspired me, although the rest of my losses
• 5:20
  also inspired me. But that one in particular,
• 5:23
  because it involved my daughter and the three grandkids and they
• 5:28
  meant the world to me. And seeing that they were not
• 5:32
  provided with accurate support, I guess it's the way to say it.
• 5:38
  And their processing journey, it really moved me to help others
• 5:43
  go through it and just hold somebody's hand and in in the
• 5:48
  process of it being their fathers.
• 5:53
  Yeah. So there's stages of grief and
• 5:57
  they talk about it being denial, anger, bargaining, depression
• 6:04
  and then acceptance. And are these, do these things
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  move in some kind of a stage by stage, like in a linear line, or
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  can they be all over the place? It could be it's, it's not
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  linear because some people might go through anger and then just
• 6:26
  go to depression and bypass all the other stages.
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  And also you can go through all of them and at some point in
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  your life you'll be triggered and you'll go back into the
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  first stage. So there is a there is a like a
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  circle effect where you can start at one point and here, but
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  then you might go back to it again especially.
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  You know, I totally understand that.
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  I, I, it's, this is a bit bizarre, but I'm going to tell
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  you, you're the first person that I've actually said this to.
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  And perhaps you can bring some conscious competency around it.
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  So I journeyed with my husband for a very long time while he
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  was sick and he had been misdiagnosed with vascular
• 7:16
  dementia and he went down like a ton of bricks and he dilapidated
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  every single day. We just watched him lose so many
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  different functions where he ended up being unable to speak,
• 7:35
  walk, talk or feed himself. And yet during this process, I
• 7:41
  had this. It was almost like I fell in
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  love with this new version of him and it was heartbreaking.
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  And I know that when I look back, I was going through a lot
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  of denial because him being a chiropractor, me being a
• 8:01
  practitioner, we thought we could magically cure him.
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  But then we finally found out that he had the fatal, always
• 8:11
  100% fatal. CJ Dingbang quits food.
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  Jacob disease, in case you weren't aware, which is like a
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  human form of mad cow disease. And this is when a prion of the
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  brain folds and it has this domino effect.
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  So when I had to move into acceptance, however, I quite
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  often describe the whole journey.
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  I don't think anybody will ever know what we went through
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  together, but I was with him every single day and we had to
• 8:45
  fight through it all. And it was grief in motion.
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  But I was upholding him and in a way he was upholding me as well.
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  We were, yeah. And a lot of spiritual coaches
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  were following my journey and they were saying, look, he is
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  actually upholding you as much as you ask him.
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  And he did have the longest journey of CJD that I had seen
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  researched, and I've researched it quite extensively.
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  But he survived a year, which is absolutely phenomenal.
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  Yeah. But here's my part that I want
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  to get to. When he passed away, there was I
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  felt like I'd gone through the denial.
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  I felt like I moved through the anger.
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  I felt like I experienced everything to the point when he
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  was diagnosed, I almost moved into acceptance.
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  But when he looked at me one day and told me to let him go with
• 9:56
  his eyes, I knew I had to. I and I cried my heart out and I
• 10:03
  cried more in the 12 months leading up then after his death.
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  Here's my question. So it was almost like I've had
• 10:14
  integrative grief, anticipatory grief.
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  And then, as now, you just talked about the cycle and how
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  people can do a full circle. And come back to it.
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  Yeah, what I'm finding because time has changed in I had moved
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  into a completely like a time lapse feels like he died three
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  years ago, not three months ago. And I find that just recently,
• 10:48
  the further I've moved away from the 12 month time that I spent
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  with him, it's like my brain recently has forgotten almost
• 11:05
  about the journey we were on for 12 long months where I'd had the
• 11:12
  the integrative grief. And it's almost like the other
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  day I found myself going, did he really die?
• 11:20
  Did that actually really happen? And I thought to myself, what on
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  earth is going on here? Why am I even asking myself that
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  question? But it's almost like the further
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  I've got away from that sickness for 12 months that he had, my
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  brain has jumped back in time to where he was and I'm going,
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  surely he didn't. How did he die?
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  He seemed invincible. Is there any explanation for
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  that or Rhino Reason 10? Have you ever heard of a case
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  like that? Such a long.
• 11:59
  Yeah, it's it does happen because our own brain hasn't.
• 12:07
  So many things happen to our brain.
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  It's not just an emotional effect, but in the act of
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  acceptance, we go through the motion as we are going through
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  the grief. And then at some point we
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  actually like you came to a point where you say, huh, did he
• 12:28
  really die? So you're going back to you're
• 12:33
  bargaining. That's the bargaining I was
• 12:39
  going to say. What's the bargaining bitch?
• 12:42
  Yeah, Did he? Is he?
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  Could I have done something more?
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  You're bargaining with yourself like.
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  I see, yes, Even playing out things in your brain like
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  sliding doors and going back and going maybe if we did something.
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  Yeah, I call it the should have put a widow.
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  It's it's so bizarre. So you talk about grief and how,
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  because I know that the grief for family members is much
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  different to mine, but then they weren't, they didn't go through
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  the grief that I'd gone through for the 12 months.
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  So it was completely different. So for them, it was just like,
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  because their relationship with him is close now, it's just he's
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  not there anymore. And it's the normal shock of
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  losing their father or their brother or their stepfather or
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  uncle. And it's so different to the
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  journey that I have. And in some ways I was thinking
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  to myself, I don't know whether it's better or worse the way
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  that I've been doing that grief, because I have done it a lot
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  longer. And he always talked about it.
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  It's very interesting because he was a widower when I met him.
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  He processed that. Yeah.
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  And so I feel like he imparted so much of his wisdom to me, and
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  his way of how he internalized and processed his own wife's
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  late wife's passing was very similar to the way I was
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  processing him. Yeah, because he taught me that.
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  Yeah. I guess you talk about it being
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  very spiritual and I'd like to hear about the death process and
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  perhaps what you can share about that.
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  And I think isn't David Kessler that talks about that.
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  Yeah, yeah, yeah. We believe that we are energy.
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  When we transition, our energy still remains with our level of
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  understanding is that we still remain in the atmosphere in the
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  universe. And that's why a lot of
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  individuals say, and I've experienced it myself, you'll
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  hear they'll make you that energy will make you understand
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  that they are present. Yeah.
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  By their presence, you can smell a perfume.
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  You could hear a song that all of a sudden plays on the radio.
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  You just thought of them. Like when my boyfriend passed
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  away, he loved Michael Jackson. He passed away in 2018.
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  So there were moments that I would think of him and I would
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  see, I would listen to the radio and I would hear Michael Jackson
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  song. So I just look up.
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  I said, OK, I know you're around.
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  My mom will be a part no more a certain song energy is so
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  powerful and letting you know that they're still around.
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  They're still around you and. Energy doesn't.
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  Die. It doesn't die, and nor does
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  your spirit. Your body does.
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  Your body? Yeah, it's a borrowed vessel.
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  Yeah, it's just a vehicle, isn't it?
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  I had that. I had a beautiful experience
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  that I really put out into the universe and asked God for that.
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  I had a vision of me being able to hold him all night, and I was
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  able. I was granted that.
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  So the night before he passed, and I mean, I spent an enormous
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  amount of time with him, but this was just incredibly sacred.
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  And I wasn't with him in the room where he passed away.
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  But I don't believe I was supposed to be and I don't
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  believe he felt he could have that complete freedom to go.
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  And I wonder how much control people do have their deaths when
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  they passed. Do you know much about that in
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  terms of the spiritual side of how much they do have control
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  over their own passing? I know that they understand when
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  they're getting ready to pass, to transition.
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  As far as anything other than that, I've never experienced
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  anything like that as far as a visual seeing someone go through
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  that. But I know that we are capable
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  of understanding when our energy is diminishing in this body and
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  we are going to transition. I believe we really understand
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  that process once we're in that level of energy and.
• 18:22
  No. We know because you have
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  situations where, I don't know, someone's passing away and they
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  don't want a particular person in the room and when they see
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  that person leave, they leave. As well.
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  Yeah, they say that that it's very hard, especially if there
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  was that very strong bond and there was such an such an
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  incredible strong bond. And I feel that the extent of
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  trauma that I had gone through throughout the 12 months, I feel
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  that it wasn't, it wasn't meant to be.
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  I was not meant to be there for his passing.
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  And I feel that was an extremely sacred moment for his children
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  too, which I feel is very wonderful.
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  I believe that for me now where I'm at, there is a sense that he
• 19:19
  has almost passed over and imparted.
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  I feel imparted so much of his elements to me, like even his
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  wisdom, his humour, some of his quirky ways.
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  And they'll come out through me and I'll go, oh, that's him.
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  Yeah, it's quite interesting. So let's go through the steps of
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  how you hold people and what you suggest to people that are going
• 19:54
  through grief. I know you, you talk around
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  breath awareness and that sort of thing.
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  Can you perhaps teach on that? Yeah.
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  I, when I start a session with a client, I usually try to put
• 20:13
  them at ease and let them know that it's a safe space that we
• 20:18
  are entering and we'll go through breathing techniques to
• 20:25
  bring down their anxiety. And then after that, we can go
• 20:29
  into a short meditation and visualization to help them also
• 20:34
  bring down their levels of energy.
• 20:36
  So they can be at ease with not just with me, but with
• 20:40
  themselves and be open to whatever comes up in the
• 20:47
  conversation or whatever we can help them with.
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  And we're going to do one of these processes toward the end,
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  and I guess I'm going to leave to define whether we do a
• 21:02
  visualization or a meditation. And yeah.
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  So what do you feel happens to a person in their grave?
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  Do you feel that they are not aware of what they're going
• 21:19
  through and that makes it worse for them?
• 21:23
  Tell me about the power of what you teach around awareness.
• 21:30
  Yeah, what I teach is the process of the stages of grief
• 21:38
  and also being aware and of their body, that and their
• 21:45
  emotions. And as far as emotions go, what
• 21:49
  their emotions are. Give them the name, acknowledge
• 21:53
  that you're going through these particular feelings.
• 21:57
  Also as far as your body goes, if you need to cry, this is a
• 22:04
  cleansing of your body. And also if we with cold
• 22:10
  expressing these emotions and your body will let you know
• 22:15
  you'll have headaches, you'll be lack of sleep, lack of eating,
• 22:19
  your stomach. And just like the book from
• 22:22
  Benden where he says the body keeps the score.
• 22:27
  Yeah. Score of anything that you do
• 22:30
  not let go of release. So releasing, crying is part of
• 22:35
  the releasing and that does help you let go of a lot of things
• 22:40
  that you are retaining from expressing.
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  And when we don't express things, they will come back to
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  haunt you and your body. So how do you?
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  Explain. Do you feel that for me?
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  I cried a lot more before he passed.
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  I guess I was in a fear of losing him.
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  I didn't want him to go. I was sad I was going through
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  all of that. I know the day that he looked at
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  me, he'd, he'd given messages spiritually through other people
• 23:18
  to talk to me and say, tell her I need to go, it's OK.
• 23:24
  And I wasn't accepting it and I was getting a little bit angry.
• 23:29
  With. People that were calling me up
• 23:34
  and speaking to me and then when he the day that he did it, I
• 23:40
  just remember just crying the whole way home and I shed so
• 23:47
  many tears throughout that 12 months, more so than after he
• 23:53
  died. Now can you explain that?
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  Am I do you feel that's how I feel a sense of peace.
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  I feel like he has imparted something to me, but I think I'm
• 24:06
  emulating what you help with your clients with anyway, so
• 24:12
  it's probably helping a bit here.
• 24:14
  But I'm going to talk about meaning because I know that's
• 24:18
  part of the process that you go through as well.
• 24:24
  I have brought a lot of meaning around.
• 24:29
  The whole process of his illness is passing and where it is now,
• 24:36
  but the meaning is has got so much legacy meaning.
• 24:42
  However, from where you're sitting, do you feel there's
• 24:46
  something more that I ought to be dealing with?
• 24:49
  Am I Is this healthy that I did spend so much time crying before
• 24:56
  and now I'm not crying? He you mentioned that he was a
• 25:05
  widower, so he had already processed his own grief and his
• 25:09
  own journey with that loss prepared you for what you could
• 25:16
  possibly expect as far as your journey, and he helped you
• 25:23
  understand what you were going to go through.
• 25:28
  Wow, yeah. And he prepared you as to what
• 25:36
  he wanted and he was being, he wasn't being selfish.
• 25:46
  He was, he wanted you to understand that you were going
• 25:52
  through your own journey, not to think that you were selfish
• 25:57
  because he wanted him to stay, to understand that.
• 26:01
  He wanted to let you know that he needed to leave.
• 26:06
  And at some point you would understand that.
• 26:12
  And the crying, of course you're going to cry.
• 26:17
  You're already going through anticipatory grief and it's just
• 26:22
  like going through a whole grieving journey and then
• 26:26
  afterwards that's a different type of level of grief because
• 26:33
  you've already processed your anticipatory grief and now we
• 26:37
  continue grieving, but at a different level.
• 26:42
  Yeah. So it's more integrated grief do
• 26:45
  you feel? Yeah, yeah.
• 26:48
  They say anticipatory grief, and that's what I've been going
• 26:52
  through for 12 months and perfectly not you.
• 26:56
  I started losing that man anyway longer than 12 months ago.
• 27:01
  People probably don't know the extent of that journey.
• 27:05
  And so I grieved the man that I fell in love with and that he
• 27:11
  was no longer that person because when I didn't know he
• 27:14
  was sick, our relationship was falling apart.
• 27:18
  And I never wanted that to be because God only knows how much
• 27:22
  I love him. And so really when it came to
• 27:28
  that element of finding out that this is what's going on for him,
• 27:35
  I feel like you've just completely nailed it.
• 27:39
  Actually. It's like life just does a full
• 27:42
  circle. He was he imparted his
• 27:47
  perspective to me and amongst a whole one upon the things.
• 27:55
  And when it came time for him to go and he, I feel that he was
• 28:03
  very selfless. You know what he where he stayed
• 28:09
  around a lot longer than I think he would.
• 28:13
  A lot of people say you made his life so well for what he was
• 28:18
  going through. You was there with him every
• 28:20
  single day. But the kind of man he was, he
• 28:26
  always spoke of quality of life. Right.
• 28:30
  Yeah. So I feel that he gave me a gift
• 28:36
  of extending his life for me and I needed that.
• 28:40
  I think if he hadn't died in the kind of the normal scenario with
• 28:46
  CJD, which would six months earlier, but time changes when
• 28:52
  people are sick as things time, just there's a big time lapse.
• 28:57
  I think he gave me an extra 6 months.
• 29:01
  And for that I'm just so truly grateful for that.
• 29:06
  So talk to me about spirit being energy and what you believe
• 29:13
  happens when a person passes over.
• 29:18
  Yeah, I just want to mention something with your prior
• 29:20
  question. Remember, you're also grieving
• 29:23
  your future. You're grieving the fact that
• 29:26
  you will not have him in your future.
• 29:29
  And whatever future plans you had, they are not going to.
• 29:33
  So that's part of the grieving as well.
• 29:37
  Whatever future plans you had now have changed, and that's
• 29:43
  going to change you as well. Yeah, as far as the spiritual
• 29:52
  process of your, the energy, yeah, energy I believe is such a
• 30:01
  beautiful essence of what we call this body.
• 30:05
  And that's what really is the motor of what helps us move and
• 30:11
  process light as it is. It's a frequency, a level of
• 30:18
  frequency where this energy is and some people even actually
• 30:24
  see colors or they sense the vibrations of any energy that is
• 30:32
  around them. And it's an interesting line of
• 30:38
  understanding how we just to say soul converts to an energy level
• 30:45
  frequency and it's always going to be around us and it's never
• 30:50
  gone. It just converts into a
• 30:51
  different type of level, different type of energy.
• 30:56
  But we'll we're always sensing something.
• 31:02
  Yeah, absolutely. It's like when he had passed
• 31:06
  over and I received a call. Why don't he just left the
• 31:10
  hospital? I knew.
• 31:12
  In fact, I told the person that had called me because he was
• 31:17
  with me. I didn't feel that I needed to
• 31:20
  go back. To Yeah.
• 31:22
  Is it called body either? Yeah.
• 31:26
  A lot of people, I guess everybody was wanting to support
• 31:31
  menu and go back with me. But I just sense, no, I don't
• 31:35
  need to. I'd made peace with him.
• 31:39
  His physicality had changed form now and not part of him that had
• 31:45
  caused so much pain and illness for him, had now been set free
• 31:53
  and his spirit was right there with me.
• 31:56
  And so me, I guess that faith and that element is the meaning,
• 32:02
  isn't it? Like what you talk about?
• 32:04
  We agree that allowed that meaning that I place and it very
• 32:13
  strongly a part of my Noah that I know that to be true.
• 32:19
  And so I'm just incredibly grateful.
• 32:22
  And I guess as you hear these words and as you're, I guess I'm
• 32:27
  talking about so many elements that you go through with your
• 32:33
  clients, what would you like to demonstrate here as we start
• 32:39
  wrapping up the show? Is there a sense that you feel
• 32:44
  pulled to demonstrate part of your I was going to say magic,
• 32:50
  your gift, the work that you do. I just want to mention that I
• 32:56
  believe in the spirit so much that at the when my grandfather,
• 33:04
  my grandparents, they were actual mediums and
• 33:08
  spiritualists. And I entered a school at some
• 33:11
  point in my college years, I needed to do a paper and I stood
• 33:18
  there, I studied spiritualism for seven years.
• 33:22
  And that's what also helped me understand the spirit world a
• 33:28
  little bit more and guided me into the grief because we need
• 33:33
  to understand the pull process and my intuition kicks in and
• 33:38
  dreams and things that happen smells and it's very active.
• 33:43
  So what each individual that I see, I guide them differently.
• 33:48
  Not everybody's guided the same way.
• 33:50
  I might give you a visualization mean climbing A.
• 34:05
  It all depend on what comes to me.
• 34:09
  And what is coming to you for this process?
• 34:13
  What do you sense that would be that would really bring forth
• 34:19
  what you know that you do to help so many people?
• 34:23
  That may be relevant because I'm sitting here with you and
• 34:28
  sharing very deeply about my own journey, which obviously because
• 34:35
  you have told me about so many different processes here, I feel
• 34:41
  my story has really helped share a lot of your team.
• 34:48
  Yeah, and it helps other people hear what you go through and
• 34:51
  that they're not alone, that people have gone through things
• 34:55
  and reaching out to other people and just talking about what we
• 34:59
  go through helps us a lot, and journaling a lot of other tools
• 35:03
  that we can use. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
• 35:09
  Yes, I do. I do find myself journaling a
• 35:13
  lot and I feel that helps to get stuff that's here.
• 35:19
  Yes. You just don't want to get
• 35:24
  caught up in in this because I know that myself and another
• 35:30
  close family member, someone who's really grieving for his
• 35:35
  loss, there's that absent mindedness that gets you into a
• 35:40
  bit of trouble. I burned myself two weeks after
• 35:44
  he'd actually passed, very severely.
• 35:48
  We threw it, and I had a second degree burn.
• 35:52
  So when I was conducting his memorial, I was wearing like,
• 35:56
  Audrey Hepburn, long black gloves like Breakfast at
• 36:01
  Tiffany's. But I was bandaged up from YEAH,
• 36:07
  because I'd literally scolded myself to the plaintiffs.
• 36:12
  We thought I needed skin grafts, it was so bad.
• 36:17
  And I recognize that maybe that pain because when you're in so
• 36:22
  much pain, I don't know whether anybody's experience such even a
• 36:26
  small burn is so excruciating. So it's like almost an
• 36:31
  initiation. It was as if I was going through
• 36:37
  this Palin initiation that kind of conclude that I came through
• 36:42
  and the healing on it has been quite profound.
• 36:47
  But what's your sense to Schneeer as we come to the end
• 36:52
  of our broadcast? Do you have anything that you
• 36:58
  feel tuned into doing? Yeah, we can do what's coming up
• 37:04
  for me right now, and it's something that I have to
• 37:07
  address. I'm feeling a little pressure in
• 37:09
  my chest. I don't know if you're feeling
• 37:11
  it, but it's what is the word heartburn.
• 37:16
  What is it? Like a heartburn.
• 37:19
  OK. I don't know if you're
• 37:22
  experiencing that, but that's what the sensation I'm having,
• 37:26
  so I don't know what it's related to.
• 37:29
  OK, maybe let's take that on board because see, this is the
• 37:36
  other thing, because I've got so many resources, like even
• 37:40
  leading up to one of the things, I realized that I have a lot of
• 37:45
  resources to help combat, but I need to be able to give myself
• 37:50
  permission if I am. So where do you say heartburn?
• 37:57
  I can't say that I feel that I ought to feel that, mainly
• 38:03
  because I have been so busy today.
• 38:08
  And yet it's I'm actually sensing that maybe you're
• 38:14
  picking that up. Yeah.
• 38:17
  Yeah, yeah, that does remind me when I get overwhelmed and to it
• 38:24
  does affect either my chest or my solar plexus.
• 38:28
  So what I usually do is I try to go into a breathing exercise
• 38:34
  where we can just relax and just sit in our chairs comfortably.
• 38:42
  And I can guide you just closing your eyes and we're going to be
• 38:47
  breathing through our nose and exhaling through our nose for
• 38:51
  this one. There's a lot of different types
• 38:54
  of breathing techniques. So what I, this one I understand
• 38:59
  helps with the anxiety. So if you are going through
• 39:02
  something that's at your energy levels, at a high level, this
• 39:06
  will help you relax because you're exhaling will take a
• 39:11
  little longer than the inhaling. So it gives you more time to
• 39:14
  relax. So we're going to inhale through
• 39:16
  our nose for a count of 4/3 21 and we're going to hold our
• 39:25
  breath or a count of 4321 and we're going to exhale slowly
• 39:35
  through our nose for a count of 7654321.
• 39:48
  And we can repeat this again. So if you want to repeat it with
• 39:52
  me. So we're going to inhale through
• 39:53
  our nose for a count of 4321 and let's hold our breath for 4321
• 40:07
  and slowly exhale through our nose 7654321.
• 40:20
  Just continue breathing normally.
• 40:27
  Just open your chest up and as we're sitting here, just close
• 40:40
  your eyes and just go through regular breathing that we're
• 40:45
  just going to do a few seconds of meditating and just leaving
• 40:49
  the world out and just concentrate on your breathing.
• 41:04
  And nothing matters here, just you and your breathing.
• 41:13
  Continue breathing in and out. I want to take you on a
• 41:20
  visualization, Terry. What comes up for me is
• 41:26
  visualizing you on a top of a mountain, looking down in valley
• 41:34
  all the greenery that you see. You smell the grass behind you
• 41:42
  on the Cliff of the mountain and looking down you can feel the
• 41:47
  wind rushing against your cheeks, brushing your hair back
• 41:56
  and just seeing this beautiful Green Valley below.
• 42:07
  And you can even sense with fingers the air just rushing
• 42:11
  through your fingers. And the greenery is so green
• 42:20
  that you can't even think where you've seen this so green
• 42:23
  before. Continue breathing and just
• 42:32
  feel. Look at this vision that you see
• 42:34
  before you and let it bring you more energy and love for life.
• 42:50
  And you've been there for so many others and this is your
• 42:54
  moment to bring life and light to you.
• 43:06
  We take a deep breath and when you're ready and only when you
• 43:12
  are ready, you can come back to me.
• 43:16
  Make a deep breath. And release let it go.
• 43:29
  Yeah. Your chest open.
• 43:34
  Interesting. I lost all, I guess, sense of
• 43:41
  desire to go away anywhere other than local.
• 43:46
  I like the sort of thing down South here and where we are.
• 43:51
  But I used to spend a lot of time in Bali.
• 43:54
  I've done around about 9 retreats over there.
• 43:59
  Wow. OK, I have done a lot of
• 44:02
  retreats and I am very much one with the country and I have a
• 44:08
  lot of friends over there as well.
• 44:10
  And I've been put into a position recently because my
• 44:14
  son's going over there and and they're going over there soon.
• 44:18
  So I've been in connection and contacting some people to see if
• 44:23
  I can rally up some drivers and people who can take care of
• 44:27
  them. And all of it I've not been
• 44:29
  feeling just in the last, I don't know, maybe 24 hours I've
• 44:34
  been feeling. Oh, OK, yeah, I can talk to
• 44:38
  people in Bali again. I can communicate.
• 44:42
  And just then when you told me to go to that mountain that's
• 44:47
  it's filled with mountains and temples and rice fields and
• 44:53
  goodness knows what, and all of a sudden I just felt that cool
• 44:58
  to go back to return. So yeah, thank you.
• 45:02
  That was very beautiful. I'm very grateful for that.
• 45:06
  And I just want to say to all listeners as well that when you
• 45:13
  hear, you might want to go back and really listen to the
• 45:18
  beautiful meditation because this is the way that it works.
• 45:24
  This kind of powerful session that you've just experienced and
• 45:29
  heard with Ada is not just about myself being, like in the hot
• 45:36
  seat of the coach, but it's about you able to really feel
• 45:44
  and sense and have your own inspirational downloads.
• 45:49
  So, yeah, I'm glad you're laughing.
• 45:51
  I'm pleased that you can. The heart seat.
• 45:57
  Yeah, I love calling it the hot sink, so I love to ask this
• 46:03
  question. Sure.
• 46:05
  What would be, I always say this at the end of the show, if
• 46:08
  there's anything that you'd like to reiterate for people that are
• 46:12
  perhaps going through grief, if there's something you didn't
• 46:15
  share that you would love to share because you've written
• 46:19
  books on this, After the Serenity, after the Storm, which
• 46:25
  is absolutely what an amazing title for a book.
• 46:32
  What would you like to share is what would be your last words?
• 46:39
  What I would like to say is grief is a journey.
• 46:44
  It's part of our process. We're born and we pass away.
• 46:50
  It's part of the cycle of life and the best thing that we can
• 46:55
  do is try and understand it to the best of our knowledge and
• 46:59
  accept the information that's out there.
• 47:02
  Receive information to help you understand what the process is
• 47:09
  or could be for you or what other individuals are going
• 47:13
  through. Because when we say, oh, now God
• 47:15
  has an Angel up there, you're grieving someone that you lost
• 47:19
  that you loved. And sometimes the way we say
• 47:22
  things don't really help the people that are going through
• 47:25
  the greening process. So be mindful of what you say.
• 47:29
  Sometimes the less you say is the best thing and just hold
• 47:33
  their hand and just be there by their side.
• 47:36
  And that's what a lot of us just actually need, someone that can
• 47:40
  be by our side. You don't have to say much.
• 47:44
  Just to know that you're there for us is good enough.
• 47:50
  Very powerful, thank you. I've even done the thank you the
• 47:54
  way they do in Indonesia, Bali. Thank.
• 47:59
  You so I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
• 48:04
  Now I'm hearing my husband voice again because he used to say
• 48:07
  that, but I won't say I used to say it.
• 48:10
  And just I would just like to say to people too, if you are
• 48:14
  going through this journey, we will have Ada's, all the links
• 48:20
  and contact details in the show notes.
• 48:22
  Be sure to contact her because this is a beautiful journey that
• 48:29
  you can go on and you can feel and sense what a gentle soul Ada
• 48:34
  is as well. So thank you so much Ada.
• 48:39
  It's been great on the show. Yeah, thank you for inviting me
• 48:44
  in. Blessings to all.
• 48:47
  That goes a show where we have explored through this various
• 48:56
  topic, along with all the exciting new topics that we
• 49:01
  bring every week to enhance your personal mastery of excellence.
• 49:08
  Now, I'd love you to do me a favour, in fact be part of the
• 49:13
  legacy 1,000,000 that I have in the vision for 2028.
• 49:19
  If you know someone who really would benefit from this
• 49:25
  recording, from this episode, please share, share it with
• 49:31
  them. And when you subscribe, you get
• 49:35
  notified every week of our episode as soon as it drops.
• 49:41
  So let's do that legacy thing. Let's share, let's care, let's
• 49:48
  enrich. And I look forward to bringing
• 49:52
  you another week of the most enriching content.
• 49:57
  So until next time, stay inspired, stay awesome, and keep
• 50:02
  on mastering your excellence.