Latest / Anele and the Club on 947 / Finish this sentence: 'The happiest kids are those who...'

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Finish this sentence: 'The happiest kids are those who...' · Anele and the Club on 947

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Wake Up with a Fang, Wake Up and the Club
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: on nine four seven, a little.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Bit of parenting in the morning flast. I came across
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: this and I will watch every video. I don't know
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: if Cindy's the same. I will watch every video that
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: has got anything to do with parenting in case I'm
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: missing something.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: Just make sure that you've got your basic yeah, because you.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: You just worry as a as a parent if you're
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: not missing your kids up right, right right, every decision
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: you make, every retort you throw their way. You know,
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: it's just like I don't want somebody to be sitting
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: on a therapist chair one day and be like my.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Mom, and you know I'm here because of my mom.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: You know, she just she just never. So you watch
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: every are you like that, Sindy.
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: I just like to know that we're all black raising
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: the same child. So when parents got does your child,
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: I'm like, yes, okay.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Cool, We're all on the right track. So I came
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: across this video and I was like, well, now you
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: have my attention.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: Woman.
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: After working with children for more than twenty five years,
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: I've noticed something the happiest children. They all have one
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: thing in common.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Now, first things first, I cannot wait for Cindy to
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: start doing these videos because.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: She's it's her future.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: Absolutely and she can be like after being a mom
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: for two decades and working with children for thirty five years,
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, I promise you, I will stop and
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: I'll watch that video and be like, yes, the producer
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: tell us, what do you think she's gonna say.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna can I a wild guess. I have no idea.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna say children who play outside great.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: I don't know, yeah, sunshine and grass guys.
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: I actually thought until she said twenty five years, I
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: actually thought she was just gonna say the happiest children
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: or those who had stable Wi Fi in their house
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: growing up, because you know how kids think my house
• 1:56
  Speaker 3: was so.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: Hard we didn't have wife. Since it's using her current
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: situation as research to inform the decision that she is
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: going well, I.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: Would say a solid friendship circle maybe, Okay, that's like,
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: you know, like lots of good friends, like good friends,
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: you know, because you can have a friendship circle. But
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: if you don't have good friends, benefit.
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: You not not that you would have any experience on
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: what a happy child is.
• 2:23
  Speaker 5: I was actually was actually very happy child. Really, yes,
• 2:26
  Speaker 5: did you skip and stuff? No, because that means going
• 2:30
  Speaker 5: outside the happiest.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Childress See I had no siblings.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: Oh yay, we can't knock it. We can't knock Maybe
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: that is it? On one one eight thirty eight nine
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: four seven. I'd like for all the parents to use
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: their parenting expertise. Now, if you've been a parent for
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: two years, you've got two years under your belt. If
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: you've been apparent for eleven years, guess what you've got
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: eleven years under your belt. If you've been a guardian
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: like you or that aunt who is like a present
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: parent force in your nieces and nephew's child for twenty YEARSKI,
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: it was guess what you have? Yeah, twenty years of
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: experience under your belt? Ring us all one one eight
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: eight thirty eight nine four seven, Send us a voice.
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: Not zero eight four double zero double zero nine four seven.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: I said it's kids that play outside, But now I'm
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: thinking maybe it's food related. Could it be food related.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: Like kids that can make their own food, or kids.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: That grow up eating a certain thing I don't know, or.
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: Kids that grow up luck with the home cooked meal.
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: They maybe Frankie's just thinking of tomorrow sauce.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: Or gold.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Once again, Frankie's using his experiences to inform his decision. People,
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: this is the thing, This is what I want from you. Yeah,
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: haven't listened to this lady.
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: After working with children for more than twenty five years,
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: I've noticed something. The happiest children they all have one
• 3:57
  Speaker 4: thing in common.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: What do you think that one thing is? We need
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: your answer or one one eighty eight thirty eight nine
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: four seven call us.
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: After working with children for more than twenty five years,
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: I've noticed something. The happiest children, they all have one
• 4:21
  Speaker 4: thing in common.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: This is way from world. I think all children who
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: have siblings.
• 4:27
  Speaker 4: Theiest children have a good routine and discipline.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Is a child that doesn't do home choice that they.
• 4:34
  Speaker 6: Have parents that allow them to have big feelings, parents
• 4:39
  Speaker 6: who don't be like no, don't cry so cry for that.
• 4:42
  Speaker 4: Children that have happy parents.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: I children that have what happy parents? This is very true?
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: Well, then puts a lot into perspective, doesn't it.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: For the rest of us.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: I like the routine one because I've always found kids
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: thrive under routine. As soon as don't know what's happening,
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: you know, then it's like it can't be scattered. They
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: can't eat at a different time every single day of
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: the year. Yes, there's room for like thirty minutes day
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: and thirty minutes day, but I just find that kids
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: who like, no, it's homework now, it's sleeping time, now,
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: it's eating time, now, it's TV time now, there's a
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: certain safety nets that surrounds them because they're almost like, no,
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: what's going to happen. Kids that don't have that certain thing,
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: I just don't it's anxiety. I don't know what's going
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: to happen, when it's going to happen, how it's gonna happen.
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it just adds a layer of structure and order
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: to their lives, and it takes a lot of the
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: thinking away for them. You know exactly that they know
• 5:38
  Speaker 3: what to expect. There's never any surprise.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: But do you think it's what she's talking about? Because
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: would you be able to observe that in the child?
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: So if you're working with children, would you know that
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: kid has a structure.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: I didn't have a structure growing up, and I'm okay, no,
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: you're happy, Okay, No, there was no structure.
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: Guys.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: It was like what times you eat? I don't know.
• 5:54
  Speaker 5: But the reverse of that is Sindly, it's become the
• 5:57
  Speaker 5: most structured grown up I know.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Guys. I will think to one story that Sindy told
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: us she would come home from school and eat a
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: teap on steak.
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: And then it was like, what's time supper?
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: Oh? Where your dad gets over? When is he getting home?
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: You know when he drives in the typeway. Goodness, you're
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: not writing good morning? Goodness? Goodness? What's that? There's a goodness?
• 6:22
  Speaker 5: Mercy shall follow me all of the days. Amen, I
• 6:27
  Speaker 5: was about to catch the spirit goodness.
• 6:29
  Speaker 7: I've heard that.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: Well one more, add one more to your telling their goodness?
• 6:36
  Speaker 7: How many on radio?
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: Goodness? Gracious, mesh, there we go. Okay, we can go on.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: We won't.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: All right, Goodness, we got you out of the radio hibernation.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: You've never called. So it means that you have something
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: good to say.
• 6:55
  Speaker 7: Yes, So my thoughts are from my own kids, children
• 7:00
  Speaker 7: who play with their parents.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: Okay, I like.
• 7:07
  Speaker 7: I've seen how I've seen what that does with my kids,
• 7:09
  Speaker 7: So really, I hope that's the one.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: I agree with you, because as soon as like, we'll
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: we'll do that, We'll have an Essay's Got Talent in
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: the house and it was everyone everybody's got an hour
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: to go figure out their talent. And then they come
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: back and they perform, right, and then they perform, and
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: then okay, we score them. And then afterwards they're like, okay,
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: now you guys performing. Then my husband and I like, oh,
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: we're ready for you guys, and then we perform, and
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: then they're the judges and then they're quitting us. It
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: literally stands out in their memory. They're like, when are
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: we going to play Essays Got Talent again?
• 7:41
  Speaker 7: See, that's the thing. They'll talk about it for the
• 7:44
  Speaker 7: whole week with everyone. So I think they really enjoyed
• 7:47
  Speaker 7: when they play with their parents.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: That's nice. Goodness. What do you play with the kids?
• 7:53
  Speaker 6: Oh?
• 7:53
  Speaker 7: Gosh, football, I boy, So we kick a lot of
• 7:56
  Speaker 7: balls in the house.
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, oh, in the house?
• 7:59
  Speaker 7: Hey, in and out. I don't know.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: You don't have vasis that you like? Eh?
• 8:06
  Speaker 7: No, no, I don't.
• 8:09
  Speaker 5: I'm surprised you're not sitting on bean bags.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: Every mom, every mom has said this, Yeah, I can
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: have nothing nice because of you guys. Nothing nice. One
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: one eight eight thirty eight nine four seven. Goodness is suggestion.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: There's a great one, but it's not what this woman's
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: talking about.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: Oh no, not that thing.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: But this is the thing. There are many ways to parents,
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: and this is what we're discovering this morning, and this
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: is why we want you to call us on one
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: one eight eight thirty eight nine four seven. What immediately
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: comes to your mind when you hear this woman? What
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: answer do you have for her?
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 8:48
  Speaker 4: After working with children for more than twenty five years,
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: I've noticed something. The happiest children they all have one
• 8:56
  Speaker 4: thing in common.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: I think the ali they've gone one thing in command,
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: which is laziness. Those that have lots of friends around them.
• 9:06
  Speaker 6: I think it's disciplined children. And as a parent for
• 9:09
  Speaker 6: thirty five years, I am sure about that. The happiest
• 9:13
  Speaker 6: children have one thing in common, and that is routine.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: Reach.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: Sister Amen Marle's in Midrand.
• 9:21
  Speaker 8: Good morning, Good morning, how are you guys?
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: We are great? How are you?
• 9:26
  Speaker 8: I'm good? Thank you?
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: Oh you're an old pair. Oh you've got the Oh
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: you've got the data. Honey, you've got all of the
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: because you go from household to hassle to housshle to haussle,
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: so you can compare them. Oh exactly.
• 9:40
  Speaker 8: And I've been in a pay for twenty five years.
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 9:44
  Speaker 8: So my opinion, I think it's screen time. I think
• 9:48
  Speaker 8: the happiest kids are the kids that don't have screen time,
• 9:52
  Speaker 8: that aren't open to all the things that they see
• 9:55
  Speaker 8: on their iPad, phones, television, get to play outside and
• 10:00
  Speaker 8: just love themselves freely.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: But this is my question, because screen time is only
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: really a thing for the last what like ten.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: Ten years before that, the other fifteen years of your
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: opener life was it?
• 10:10
  Speaker 8: So?
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: Is it playing outside? Is it just being themselves?
• 10:13
  Speaker 8: It's just being themselves and having to explore things and
• 10:16
  Speaker 8: the ability to just find themselves as little humans.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I've also found kids who go towards making mistakes
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: with glee are also quite happy.
• 10:31
  Speaker 6: Try.
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I want scared to try because kids who raise
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: me like no, don't do that, No, you're gonna do
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: that wrong? No, no, no, no no, It packs up and
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: then you find that they minimize themselves, and they don't
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: try things, and they don't you know that, they don't
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: try new things, and they don't dare themselves to do
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: things because they used to being told no, you can't
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: do that, don't do it. Do you know what I'm saying.
• 10:50
  Speaker 8: Exactly exactly, And that's why I allow for them, especially
• 10:53
  Speaker 8: the little one I'm worth now, I allow her to
• 10:57
  Speaker 8: do anything. She's eighteen months old, she climbs ladders and
• 11:02
  Speaker 8: does all sorts of things because I allow her to
• 11:06
  Speaker 8: be that brave little one that she knows that she
• 11:09
  Speaker 8: can do these things.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: And how much is the highness that you put on.
• 11:17
  Speaker 6: It?
• 11:17
  Speaker 8: Trusts me? I'm i hov but but yeah, they have
• 11:21
  Speaker 8: they have to find that that confidence in themselves.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, MADLEI, thank you so much for your for your
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: input on this. Greatly appreciated as an opay of twenty
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: five years. We're staying in Midrand. We're going to Abdul.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Good morning, Abdull, very good morning, nearly and the club
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: morning morning. How are you sir?
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: Good God.
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: Frank is sitting up straight all of a suddenly, Oh
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: you nervous. Frank is nervous.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, welcome, welcome. Now you just sound you sound so
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: put together out door. I can hear it.
• 11:52
  Speaker 9: A great compliment.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: Thanks kind of word.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: Talk to us. What do you what do you think
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: uh contributes to kids being happy?
• 12:02
  Speaker 9: My thinking is that it's having an active, you know,
• 12:05
  Speaker 9: father or male figure in their lives.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: No, we've we've spoken about this. Remember what what was
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: that that program we used to support man with the
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: if there was a bunch of guys who get together
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: and their character Character company. Yes, they're still going very all,
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: going very good. And you know what it is. It's
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: just a father figure, a strong male figure to let
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: you know that they are there for you at all times.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: It really molds kids in another way.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: True.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Sorry, yeah, you do you want to give us like
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: an example in your life maybe with your dad or
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: how you parent.
• 12:42
  Speaker 9: Abdul Well, I've been married for just over twenty six years.
• 12:48
  Speaker 9: I've got four sons ranging from from eight years old
• 12:51
  Speaker 9: to twenty four years old. And you know I've got this.
• 12:56
  Speaker 9: I've still got.
• 12:56
  Speaker 7: Some and I'll tell.
• 12:58
  Speaker 9: You I've got to be isn't in all conversations with
• 13:01
  Speaker 9: with each of them differently, how I show up with
• 13:04
  Speaker 9: them has to be different. And you know, to too
• 13:06
  Speaker 9: many things like faenis. You know, the older words always
• 13:09
  Speaker 9: think that the younger one, the younger ones get away
• 13:11
  Speaker 9: with murder. So I've got to manage all of those things.
• 13:14
  Speaker 9: But I've also done sort of community work, you know,
• 13:16
  Speaker 9: drug support work at teacher and and my experience is
• 13:19
  Speaker 9: pretty much the same. And sometimes it's it's made me
• 13:23
  Speaker 9: sort of the poor reflection of of us as men
• 13:26
  Speaker 9: when when I watch other women sort of step up
• 13:28
  Speaker 9: to to to help out when they are issues like that,
• 13:32
  Speaker 9: you know, and I see that in the children that
• 13:34
  Speaker 9: we work with and we coach. It sometimes stills to
• 13:37
  Speaker 9: me like that's that's sort of the team.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: The team, you know that all of.
• 13:41
  Speaker 9: The mother and I mean my mom my wife is
• 13:43
  Speaker 9: absolutely the boss in my home. I know that my
• 13:46
  Speaker 9: kids know that, but they also know what their limits
• 13:50
  Speaker 9: are with her and there with me, and then I
• 13:52
  Speaker 9: have the honor the fact that showing up for them
• 13:54
  Speaker 9: in a way that that they need when they need it.
• 13:57
  Speaker 9: That's that's important.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I absolutely agree with you of dol As a
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: person who we have three kids in our household, I
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: can feel the different comfort levels and the different excitement
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: when my husband is in the house and when he's
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: not I can. I can feel it. With the kids. Yes,
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: there's a different energy, there's a and I'm quite a
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: playful parent as well. But when my husband is in
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: the house, there's like a different likeness and there's a
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: different risk taking factor, like they just want to do more.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: They do more tricks on the bikes, they want to
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: show more things on with the cricket bat and this.
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: There's just like a a freer nature with with Buzza
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: around as with me, right, you know with me. With me,
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: there's a there's a nurture feel, there's a warmth, there's
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: a safety neess, there's a oh we know where to
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: go to get this, and a and a warm hug whatever.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: But with Buzza, it's like they just know that they
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: become bolder. There we go. That's the way I'm looking for.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: Kids become bolder when there's a father figure around. Beautiful
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: and to make it in life, you have to raise
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: bold kids. You have to raise so Abdul, you absolutely courage.
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: I agree with you. I don't know if this lady
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: in the skip is going to agree with you. So
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: now let's all gather around and find out what she
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: has been going on about for the past forty minutes.
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 15:21
  Speaker 4: They have at least one adult who truly truly sees them,
• 15:27
  Speaker 4: an adult who listens, who celebrates their questions, who doesn't
• 15:31
  Speaker 4: rush to fix them, who makes them feel they are enough.
• 15:36
  Speaker 4: Children don't become confident because we keep praising them. They
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: become confident because they deeply feel accepted. Be that adult
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: for a child.
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: Wow, there we go, right, yes, exactly there you know,
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: yeah wow. And and the woman in the city might
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: stone me for saying this, but are more patient.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: I do love how she says a parent because I think, yeah,
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: I mean, obviously, we know a lot of single moms
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: that are a parenting and doing their best. Maybe that's
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: the message for you. If you're listening to Abdul, for example,
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: saying I wish my son or my daughter had that,
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: the point is that be praisent for your kids. That's
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: what's going to get them forward.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: He we listen. We have to play it again.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: We play it again.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: Listen to it carefully.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 16:24
  Speaker 4: The happiest children I've met all have one thing in common.
• 16:29
  Speaker 4: They have at least one adult who truly truly sees
• 16:35
  Speaker 4: them an adult who listens, who celebrates their questions, who
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: doesn't rush to fix them, who makes them feel they
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: are enough. Children don't become confident because we keep praising them.
• 16:48
  Speaker 4: They become confident because they deeply feel accepted. Be that
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: adult for a child.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Start to making your moaning and the class on their
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: love This show on nine four seven