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Why People Don’t See Things Like We Do and the Impact on Them and Us · The Missing Secret Podcast

• 0:00
  Kelly Hatfield: Welcome to the missing secret Podcast. I'm Kelly Hatfield,
• 0:04
  John Mitchell: Hey, and I'm John Mitchell. So here's our topic today, why people don't always seem see things like we do, and what's the effect on both them and us. So Kelly, what's your initial thoughts on on this topic.
• 0:23
  Kelly Hatfield: When you first brought this up, I'm like, boy, this is timely, because there is a lot of this happening right now. I mean, right that we're recording this things politically have never been so charged as they are right now. So I'm excited to dive into this conversation and to hear your perspective on this
• 0:41
  John Mitchell: Well, so here's what, here's my thoughts on this. You know, sometimes when people see things differently than than we see things. You know, it has no impact at all. It's just a difference of opinion. You know, everybody's entitled their opinion. But sometimes it really, really matters, and one person's right and one person's wrong. You know, oftentimes with opinions, it's there's not a right or wrong, it's just a matter of opinion. But sometimes, when it when it matters, there's a right or wrong and and who's right and who's wrong is determined by who's closer to the truth and the something that, that you know I see today is disregarded. You know, everything seems to be to be an opinion. Literally, everything is an opinion. There is no truth anymore. Of course, we have a president that that ignores the truth and encourages millions of other Americans to ignore the truth? Well, that's to their detriment, you know, I'll give you an example. So, you know, a week or so ago, Elon Musk, on behalf of Trump, comes out and sends an E, literally, an email to 2 million government employees and says, Please respond to this email and tell us what you accomplished in the last week. Tell us five things. So in your opinion, did you like that or not like that? How'd you take that?
• 2:16
  Kelly Hatfield: For me, I am always going to look at this from a leadership standpoint, and I'm always going to look at this from an empathetic standpoint with because remember, too, I own companies, so I'm looking at this through the lens of leadership and through the lens of the person who's going to be receiving this information. And so no, I didn't like it, and I didn't like it for a couple of different reasons. First of all, the tactic that's being used to kind of scare people. It was, if you don't do this, you're basically in effect, or we're considering this a resignation. So the threat that goes along with this, you know, and also to making people feel like they're the enemy, like, you know, there's this whole thing that's devaluing them as employees, and the message that an email like this sends to people, no, I didn't like it at all. I thought, I think there's nothing wrong with the different organizations wanting clarity as part of a process to kind of vet and determine who needs to go. Because I think we can all agree, you know, the government is overstaffed and bloated. You know what? There is a way of going about doing it where people, you can still have people have their dignity, and it's done in a respectful way, not a threatening way, not and done by their through the proper chain of command, not through some you know, I'll be good. I won't say what I want to say about it, but, you know, I think that it is the way in which that was handled that I have the biggest problem with, and making people feel like they don't have value and that they are expendable, you know. So I didn't like it. I thought it was an awful way to handle that situation, and the fact that it was sent by him and sent by their direct supervisors, by people within that organization. So that was my problem with that. So I was not I thought that was a terrible way to handle that well, you know, as a leader,
• 4:17
  John Mitchell: Well, you you make some very, very good points. You know, my reaction to it was, I liked it. I thought, you know, first of all, they got 2 million people on the payroll, and let's just see if we got live human beings just respond. And as long as you're going to get them to respond, you might as well ask them, would you accomplish the last five years, and so I liked it, but you know this, I was hoping that you would feel the way you feel. I thought you would, but I wasn't sure. Yeah, that's a perfect example of two people, you and me, processing the same information, and we're processing it differently. We come up with different opinions well. So you know, each of us is entitled to our opinion and is as we are people. We you have to respect other people's opinions and and factor in. They're taking the same information you've got and they're just processing it differently, and that's okay. But here's another example. You know, there is no truth relative to one or the other, just a matter of opinion. Okay, now let's look at the other thing about Trump, and so he comes out a week or so ago and says that Ukraine started the war, blatant lie. I mean, couldn't be more untrue. But the problem is, you know, literally, I just read this this morning, a million people have died in that war. A million people, biggest war since World War Two in Europe, and so you know, Trump takes that position. It's obviously contrary to the truth. And now you know, being flat out wrong and and now it dictates a policy for the United States that is wrong. It's going to hurt people, and it's going to have real consequences. And so the point I'm trying to make is that when you see that people have a different opinion than you do, just determine what is at stake here. Is there is there really something at stake, or is it just a matter of opinion? And in you know, if, if it's just a matter of opinion, even though you may strongly feel one way and somebody else feels another way, you know, we live in America, you're entitled to your opinion, and we need to support everybody can express their opinion and have different opinions, but I'll tell you when they're wrong. I'm like, Let's go fight for it, you know, argue it, push it. And it's so easy to to know what's right or wrong by what is the truth. You buy all that
• 7:16
  Kelly Hatfield: I do you know when, and that is something too. And because, again, you'll have some people pushing back on well, is that the truth? You know what I mean? And it's like, yeah, if you can, if there are, you have facts that can verify that statement that you make, you know, like it is, we all know who is in Ukraine's country right now.
• 7:37
  John Mitchell: Yeah, right, right.
• 7:40
  Kelly Hatfield: Like, that, you know. And I think that's the hardest part for me with so much of this, is like, you know, don't tell me that what I'm not seeing I'm not seeing, you know what I mean, or what I'm seeing that I'm not seeing, or what I you know, it's those kinds of things. And that's, I agree with you wholeheartedly, that when the fact is, the fact right there is, this is backed by data, you know, and we have recordings. We know exactly what led to where we're at and who is responsible for the Ukraine war.
• 8:13
  John Mitchell: Well, and you know, you, you make the key point, I think, in that now, whatever you say, people go, Well, that's your opinion. No, no, it's the truth, you know. Again, let's always lean back towards the truth and determine the truth when things matter, you know. But I think that's the problem with Trump. And again, I like a lot of the things he he does, but boy, he does some boneheaded, unenlightened things as well. And you know, he's this is why I had real concerns about, you know him as president, because I felt like he was hurting our culture by lying and never embracing the truth as why I've been such a Mickey Haley fan. But I think he promotes the absence of focusing on the truth with, you know, millions of people. I think
• 9:11
  Kelly Hatfield: it's we can agree. I know on on a couple of different things related to him, you know, and that's one of them, like, one of my biggest concerns is what you're talking about right now, which is the truth. You know that line between truth and lies and how it's degrading our culture. Businesses you're seeing like, like, corporations kind of falling in line, and some of what like, yeah, and these different congressmen and senators that are who've been saying one thing and now are compromising their integrity in every possible way by by saying that what is we know to be true isn't true. And right, just two months ago, you have them recorded saying exactly what we're saying, you know, and so it's. Hypocrisy. And I worry about, from a cultural standpoint, when we talk about too that email that you mentioned in some of the ways that they're going about doing what they're doing, it's opening the door up for people to treat people other people that way. And also, I worry about what's happening right now and making it okay to lie, and making it okay because you've got the leader of the world lying in every other sentence about you know, some more blatant than others. Some you could maybe argue around. Maybe there's a version, a twisted version, of what he's saying that is the truth, but there are some things that are just straight out now, like, who started the Ukraine war? That is a lie, right? And that is what I worry about, just from our culture, and the fabric of our culture, is that you've got the person leading the country who's making it okay for other people to lie and cheat, yeah? And so, yeah, it's a tough time right now. And yeah, that line between truth and opinion is getting more and more blurred every single day.
• 11:08
  John Mitchell: You know, I tell you, whatever Trump says, I divided by three, and that's probably what it is drugs than the truth. You know, right?
• 11:18
  Kelly Hatfield: You have to do that though
• 11:19
  John Mitchell: Oh, it's ridiculous, and I'm probably being generous, yeah. And again, I personally think he's done some good things. But I turn I watched something last night on Oh, is Mark Cuban. He makes a great point. He had a, you know, one minute little blurb, and he says, you know, the press really missed this when Trump was being prosecuted in New York, and you know, Michael Cohen testified to this. He says that he would meet with with Trump, and Trump would say, Okay, I want you to short our vendors. You know, whatever their bill is, just pay them 20% less well. You know, that's the foundational principle of a businessman. You know that you engage people, and you contract to do this or that, and you pay them what, what you agree to, and when you foundationally are are going against that, and you're telling your attorney to just carte blanche, short change the people that did their work. I mean, that tells you volumes about the man.
• 12:24
  Kelly Hatfield: Tells you everything you need to know about the man in my right, right, and his way of seeing kind of is a through line right. Now, that's the part, like you do not treat people the way, using the words that he uses, and that you just don't treat people that way, all right? So that's the part for me, where he's dehumanizing, devaluing. He's like, These people don't have a you know, and I at the same time, like, I agree massive cuts need to be made, but they're way to do it, where people have their respect and dignity, and where everybody you know does. But that's not what's happening, you know, at all.
• 12:58
  John Mitchell: Well, I think you make a great point. I mean, you know, I was for it, but I see your point, and I think your point is a good one. You know, there would be a way more tactful way to do it, and an effective way,
• 13:11
  Kelly Hatfield: Exactly, not that that couldn't like, there's no, nothing wrong with that, with wanting to know what people are doing, but there are so many better ways to have delivered that and where you would have got the response instead. Now they're in court. There's creating all this chaos and confusion and everything. Well, should I, or shouldn't know their bosses, right? Like nobody knows what the hell's going on. And so they created all of this chaos by handling it the way they did, instead of stopping for a minute looking at this from all different angles, you can still pull the trigger fast, but think this through, because you are dealing with people and they're right,
• 13:49
  John Mitchell: Right? Well, you know how this maybe all relates to think it be it and and what we talk about here, you know, I just, I'm teaching the core think it'd be it to my class. I taught the first core class last sourcing. I'm going to teach the second class, core to be tomorrow. And so, you know, I was thinking about this, and I'm going to deliver this speech to him tomorrow. I'm going to go so you students are going to fall in one of three categories. Either you're you're in the category that boy, you are all into this. You can you get it? You can't get enough of it. You're implementing it into your life. This is the greatest thing since sliced bread that. So that's category one. Then Category Two is some of the students are a little skeptical, and they're interested in it because it's, it's science based, but they're skeptical. And I'm like, Okay, I think a little skepticism is actually, actually good, but you know, and I'm going to tell them, I go, you know, I'm going to get you. Do in that that second bucket to come in the first bucket, because I saw myself even do it last semester. Because what the students that were initially skeptical told me, they said, Well, you know, yeah, we were little skeptical at first, but we're like, you know, we got to learn this stuff anyway, you're going to grade us on it, and so we might as well apply it to our life and see what happens. I mean, what do we have to lose? And then they they did it, and they're like, Oh, wow. I now I see so I ended up getting probably 85% of my my students to really fully buy in. But then there's a third category, and they're the ones that are decidedly not buying in. And you know, I'm like saying to them, so you don't buy into the idea of creating immense clarity in your life and feeding it to yourself every day is your new morning routine? Okay, okay. Well, first of all, you know, to get anything approved at the University of Texas Business School, which is, you know, ranked, according to us, News and World Reports, as one of the top five business schools in the country, is super hard, you know, and they vetted everything i I'm teaching. And so you're telling me that your judgment is better than their judgment. And, you know, I'm just trying to help you be more successful. And so you think that winging life is better than than applying the central concept of the top book world on success to your life and and all the science that goes behind this. And really, the beauty of it is how simple it is and and how we have this AI algorithm makes it super simple to apply to your life. And I, I'm going to say to him, I'm like, ignore this at your peril. Ignore this at your peril, because it's going to be an opportunity that you may regret the rest of your life. And so, you know, and then I'm going to soften it up and say, you know, even if, even if you don't apply it, you know, that's fine, you know, I still care about you. You know you're still the younger version of me, and what you can learn, I'm going to plant the seed for other things you're going to learn in the future. And you may come come around to this a little later, but you know the, I guess, the point of making that, that statement, and I would say this to our audience, although I, you know, I know I'm preaching to the choir, but you know, I would say to the the larger audience, maybe. So how's that wing in life working for you? Or is he creating, creating the dream for you? I don't think so. Yeah, and tune into the truth. What you know, what is the truth about creating success? I won't bore you with all the details, but I'm telling you it all boils down at the end of the day, I think defeating the succinct articulation of your desired life to yourself each day, yeah, no, I love it. Okay. Okay, ponder that little thought, yeah. Next time. Okay, until next time. We'll see you.