Latest / I Choose Me with Jennie Garth / I Choose ... My Own Love Story with Constance Zimmer

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I Choose ... My Own Love Story with Constance Zimmer · I Choose Me with Jennie Garth

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  Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Welcome
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: to I Choose Me, the podcast about choices. Today we
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: celebrate the choices we cannot make until we are seasoned
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  Speaker 1: and have some years of experience under our belts. I'm
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  Speaker 1: sitting down with a woman I have admired for years.
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  Speaker 1: She plays the kind of characters that make you lean in, powerful, sharp, unapologetic.
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  Speaker 1: From the speakerphones of Entourage to her life changing role
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  Speaker 1: in Love Story, Constance Zimmer brings an enviable, genuine fire
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  Speaker 1: to our screens. I've known Constance since way back in
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  Speaker 1: the day, and one of the things I love about
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  Speaker 1: her is that she is the real deal on screen
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  Speaker 1: and more importantly, off screen. Constance has been married since
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  Speaker 1: twenty ten. She's a mom, and at fifty, she co
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  Speaker 1: founded a media company and launched a podcast called Talk
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  Speaker 1: fifty to Me. Because like me, she believes midlife is
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  Speaker 1: not an ending, it's a fierce beginning. Please welcome Constance Zimmer. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: did you ever think you'd be working this hard? No,
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  Speaker 1: at the stage in your life?
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  Speaker 2: No?
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  Speaker 1: No, what did you think would be happening for you?
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  Speaker 1: You're You celebrated your fiftieth birthday a couple of years ago.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm twenty twenty COVID.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, so you're well into your fifties. Did you have
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  Speaker 1: like a vision of what you think your life in
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  Speaker 1: your fifties was going to be?
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  Speaker 3: Like, Yeah, I thought it was going to be like
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  Speaker 3: my forties, which was I was told that I wouldn't work,
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  Speaker 3: and yet my forties were like my busiest time of
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  Speaker 3: my career.
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  Speaker 2: I'm so far mad, so far.
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  Speaker 3: Kind kind of words what I think it was like
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  Speaker 3: for me when my fifthes youth birthday, when I had
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  Speaker 3: this idea that I wanted to like, you know, rent
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  Speaker 3: out like a small boutique hotel in Pump Springs with
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  Speaker 3: like fifty of my friends, and and then COVID happened,
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  Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, I should have taken that
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  Speaker 3: birthday as like a like a hint that my fifties
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  Speaker 3: were going to be fucked, because I feel like ever
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  Speaker 3: since then, everything has been really hard warp speed, really hard,
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  Speaker 3: and yet really slow. And then yes, then the warp
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  Speaker 3: speed kicked into gear right, and then I was like,
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  Speaker 3: how I'm back on the hamster wheel again?
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  Speaker 2: Like, how did I get back hamster wheel? Right?
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  Speaker 1: I've decided that you're you. You were named Constance because
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  Speaker 1: you're constantly working. That's just the truth.
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  Speaker 3: You know, It's all perspective, perspective, perspective, right, because it's
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  Speaker 3: just weird how like I've worked on things that have
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  Speaker 3: like weirdly timed out that they've all come out on
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  Speaker 3: top of each other, even though like I did.
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  Speaker 2: Them so far apart. But nobody knows that.
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  Speaker 3: Everybody just goes like, oh my gosh, she's on this
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  Speaker 3: show and this show, and I'm like, well, I shot
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  Speaker 3: that one a year ago and that one six months ago,
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  Speaker 3: and they just happened to come out at the same time, right,
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  Speaker 3: But yeah, no, I mean I think you know, I
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  Speaker 3: did you read or listen to Barbar Streisand's book, No.
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  Speaker 1: Book, I need to, Okay, I don't know if I
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  Speaker 1: have six hundred pages in me, but I.
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  Speaker 2: Mean I listened to it, and.
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  Speaker 3: I after listening to it, I was like, oh, we
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  Speaker 3: never stop as women, we never stop. And I looked
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  Speaker 3: at how old she was, and I looked at some
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  Speaker 3: of her most successful films and what she accomplished, and
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  Speaker 3: it was all later in life, and it did not
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  Speaker 3: matter that she had an oscar and Amis and like
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  Speaker 3: it didn't matter. And I think when I listened to that,
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  Speaker 3: I was like, Oh, Barbara streisand is still fucking fighting
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  Speaker 3: to get her shit done, to be hired, to be
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  Speaker 3: heard successful, yep.
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  Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, we never get to relax.
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  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'm so sad right now because I feel
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  Speaker 1: like what you're saying is one hundred percent true. But
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  Speaker 1: when I mean, do you have in your mind like
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  Speaker 1: at sixty, I want to be able?
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  Speaker 2: For me?
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  Speaker 1: I always said my fifties are my building decade, because
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  Speaker 1: you know, so much of my life has been decided
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  Speaker 1: for me and all of that. But now I have
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  Speaker 1: just this certain perspective that's like, I'm doing what I
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  Speaker 1: want to do now. And then I I thought, maybe
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  Speaker 1: at sixty I'll be able to chill out a little bit.
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  Speaker 2: I don't think so.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, you know, because you know Heidi, who is
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  Speaker 3: ten years older than me, right who you is?
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  Speaker 1: Your co host?
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  Speaker 2: Yes, my co host on my podcast.
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  Speaker 3: You know she talks a lot about the difference is
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  Speaker 3: that at least in the sixties, in your sixties, you
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  Speaker 3: feel so good that you survived your fifties that there
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  Speaker 3: is a little bit of a relief of what we're
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  Speaker 3: talking about, right, like hopping back on the hamster wheel
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  Speaker 3: and like proving, proving and reinventing and pivoting and planting
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  Speaker 3: seeds because I do agree with you, you and I
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  Speaker 3: are doing that where I think, like we're planting all
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  Speaker 3: these seeds now in.
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  Speaker 2: Hopes that those things will.
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  Speaker 3: Grow so that when we are in our sixties maybe
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  Speaker 3: we can go, oh, it's so nice to see that work.
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  Speaker 2: I can sit back a little bit.
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  Speaker 3: But I also think, like people who are creatives at
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  Speaker 3: their core, right, we never stop because we can't.
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  Speaker 2: We can't. And also, you know, I have dreams.
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  Speaker 3: I definitely have dreams of you know, buying a like
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  Speaker 3: an eight bedroom villa in Europe somewhere and making it
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  Speaker 3: a like bed and breakfast and like my income coming from,
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  Speaker 3: you know, like giving people a place to say, in
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  Speaker 3: a beautiful setting. And my husband is this incredible cook,
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  Speaker 3: and like he would make the meals and I would
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  Speaker 3: do like.
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  Speaker 2: Crafts with people, you know, or a garden. Like I
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  Speaker 2: have those dreams.
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  Speaker 3: But then I go, Okay, concerns, how long do you
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  Speaker 3: think that would make you feel good?
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  Speaker 2: Right?
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  Speaker 1: Would you get bored?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah? I don't know, And I guess we won't know
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  Speaker 2: until we do it.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think we need to try it. Let's just
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  Speaker 1: open the boutique. But honestly, that sounds like a lot
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  Speaker 1: of work running, owning and building another business. And yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I mean when you really break it down, Yeah, I
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  Speaker 1: have to talk to you about love story for a second,
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  Speaker 1: because lady, you were so fucking good in that.
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  Speaker 3: So I'm really working on trying to accept compliments. It's
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  Speaker 3: been a very big struggle of my whole life.
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  Speaker 2: But thank you.
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  Speaker 3: This is definitely a role that I did not see
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  Speaker 3: it having such an impact on people, and as a
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  Speaker 3: part of this show, because it's essentially on paper, it
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  Speaker 3: was very part. But it was a character that you know,
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  Speaker 3: really had so much to.
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  Speaker 1: Tell, right mean, the you knew the levels, you know
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  Speaker 1: that you were asked to play, and that you manage
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  Speaker 1: so beautifully. It's just so much like she was so tough,
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  Speaker 1: but she was so soft and she was so broken
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  Speaker 1: and you know, just all of it. It was just
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  Speaker 1: really incredible to watch and I loved seeing you rise,
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  Speaker 1: you know, within that beautiful cast to the central part
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  Speaker 1: of it.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, look, that show is based on the book,
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  Speaker 3: and the book is Carolyn Bassett's story like point of view, right,
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  Speaker 3: and the side that a lot of us weren't aware
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  Speaker 3: of and didn't know about, the struggles and how hard
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  Speaker 3: it was and how much it was destroying her, and
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  Speaker 3: so giving a voice to that, not only for her,
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  Speaker 3: but giving a voice to like her sister and her mother.
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  Speaker 3: I knew it was really important, but I just I
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  Speaker 3: didn't know how important it was going to be in
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  Speaker 3: the final product of it.
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  Speaker 2: And yeah, I'm.
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  Speaker 1: So glad it was. Wow, your part, that's as true
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  Speaker 1: as it can get. You play in Messina Freeman, the
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  Speaker 1: mother of Carolyn Beset Kennedy and her sister Lauren, who
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  Speaker 1: was never talked about. But you bring that story to
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  Speaker 1: the forefront of the whole story and I and you know,
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  Speaker 1: it was BEAUTIFU done.
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  Speaker 2: Thank you. I think.
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  Speaker 3: It was, you know, specifically after they're gone, you know,
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  Speaker 3: the way that scene in episode nine was written for
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  Speaker 3: specifically me and Grace to.
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  Speaker 2: Do was.
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  Speaker 3: Also like, I didn't change one word, you know, I
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  Speaker 3: changed shit in my scripts all the time.
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  Speaker 2: I'm constantly like, I don't know I would say that,
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  Speaker 2: I don't know how to say that. Who talks that way?
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  Speaker 2: And you're right and there was definitely.
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  Speaker 3: Language in that scene that I was like, how are
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  Speaker 3: we going to make this work? Because this is a
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  Speaker 3: lot of stuff, and it just like it was so
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  Speaker 3: weirdly magical in the moment.
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  Speaker 1: You feel it. You can feel it when you watch
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  Speaker 1: that scene specifically, it's just there's something just like electric happening.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, Like we didn't rehearse that at all.
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  Speaker 3: That was just like that, you know, Anthony Hemingway, who's
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  Speaker 3: the director of that episode, Like, you know, it was
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  Speaker 3: like do you want to rehearse? You just want to
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  Speaker 3: do it, And we were like, no, let's just do it.
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  Speaker 3: And we wanted to start in our close ups. And
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  Speaker 3: we started in our close ups. And but weirdly, I
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  Speaker 3: always get nervous about like.
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  Speaker 2: Emotion being done and like running out for.
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  Speaker 1: The second take and the third take.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, never never ran out, never ran out of emotions
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  Speaker 3: because it felt so personal and because I had lived
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  Speaker 3: in that character for already, you know, a few episodes,
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  Speaker 3: and I could make Sarah and Sydney who played Carolyn
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  Speaker 3: and Lauren, and I could make them like the loss
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  Speaker 3: of them right, which is so important. But I also think,
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  Speaker 3: you know, going back to age and experience and you know,
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  Speaker 3: I have talked a lot about that. I think it's
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  Speaker 3: also this age that I'm at and that this character
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  Speaker 3: was my age, and I added into that the layers
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  Speaker 3: of what I feel as a woman at this age.
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  Speaker 3: And she was that in the nineties, so like women
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  Speaker 3: in their fifties and the nineties were definitely ignored. And
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  Speaker 3: you know, I thought about that all the time when she.
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  Speaker 2: Walked into a room, and.
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  Speaker 3: I thought about how I felt hitting fifty five and
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  Speaker 3: the differences of the way people reacted to me or
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  Speaker 3: didn't react to me.
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  Speaker 2: And I gave that all to her. And I've never been.
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  Speaker 3: Able to do that with a character before, because all
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  Speaker 3: my characters have not had an age, right, They've never
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  Speaker 3: They've just been like me, but like nobody would know
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  Speaker 3: what age I was.
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  Speaker 1: So you you, you continually pick roles that are tough ladies,
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  Speaker 1: strong women, you know, really a point of view, and
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  Speaker 1: I love that about your choices. Do you think you
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  Speaker 1: consciously do that or these do these roles just kind
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  Speaker 1: of present themselves to you at this point because you
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  Speaker 1: do them so well, Like I mean, you started out
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  Speaker 1: at Entourage, you know, playing the never seen before h
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  Speaker 1: role of a studio head female studio head.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean from there.
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  Speaker 1: You just kind of kept going with those choices over
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  Speaker 1: the course of your career.
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  Speaker 3: Well, I give Dana Gordon on Entorage, you know, and
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  Speaker 3: I give Doug Allen a lot credit for that because
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  Speaker 3: it really was after that character that I then got
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  Speaker 3: more of those characters.
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  Speaker 2: You know.
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  Speaker 3: Again, it's that if you can't see it, you can't
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  Speaker 3: be it. It was like, all of a sudden, there
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  Speaker 3: were these very strong female characters coming out of a
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  Speaker 3: very male dominated show. So we stuck out and then
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  Speaker 3: it was like, oh wow, those women are badass. Like
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  Speaker 3: where do we put We should make more women like that, you.
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  Speaker 2: Know what I mean?
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  Speaker 3: And so I mean, and then it just became that's
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  Speaker 3: what I became, which was very weird because it's definitely
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  Speaker 3: not how I've ever seen myself.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, you don't see yourself as like this confident,
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  Speaker 1: assertive woman because that's how I see you.
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  Speaker 2: No, but I have.
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  Speaker 1: Known I have noticed, like you have this kind of
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  Speaker 1: gooey that you can tap into your emotions real quick.
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  Speaker 1: You cry a but I love it.
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  Speaker 3: I've been crying a lot more in my fifties than
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  Speaker 3: ever before. Someone told me that it was a menopause symptom.
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  Speaker 3: And I said, you can go fuck yourself, because I
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  Speaker 3: was like, that's not fair. Like, how about when you
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: get here, you realize that being vulnerable is okay and
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  Speaker 3: it's powerful, and it allows other women to see that
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  Speaker 3: they can relate to you on a level that maybe
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  Speaker 3: they didn't think they could because you seem confident and
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  Speaker 3: strong when you walk into a room. But no, I
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  Speaker 3: am like the most insecure nerdy. Like I don't know
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  Speaker 3: how to say this without completely downgrading myself, but like,
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  Speaker 3: I'm okay with not being the smartest person in the room.
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  Speaker 3: You know, I'm I've always gotten by by making people laugh.
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  Speaker 3: That's been my always my power, and so it is
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  Speaker 3: very weird for me that I became these types of characters.
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  Speaker 3: I was told in a reading, you like a spiritual
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  Speaker 3: readwrit okay, And she said to me, it's no coincidence
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  Speaker 3: that you have been playing these roles on screen.
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  Speaker 2: I said, well, what do you mean, Like she's like, no,
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  Speaker 2: you have just.
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  Speaker 3: Been waiting to become that off screen, and now at
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  Speaker 3: this point in your life, you are going to merge
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  Speaker 3: and you are going to become the women you've played
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  Speaker 3: on screen.
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  Speaker 2: And I was like, what are you talking about?
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  Speaker 1: It's like a lot to yeah, digest.
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  Speaker 3: But I said on a panel when I was talking about,
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  Speaker 3: you know, being a part of now this whole midlife
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  Speaker 3: movement and empowering women and changing the narrative around aging,
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  Speaker 3: and I said, I feel like I'm in my quinn Era,
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  Speaker 3: which is my character from Unreal And it was.
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  Speaker 2: The first time I like said that out loud.
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  Speaker 3: And so then like many months later for this woman
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  Speaker 3: to say, oh, you're merging with your characters on screen,
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  Speaker 3: I was like, oh.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Like bulb uh huh.
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  Speaker 3: Wait what So that's why she was like, it's not
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  Speaker 3: a coincidence, Like people will now listen to you or
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  Speaker 3: take you more serious because you've played those women on television.
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  Speaker 1: Isn't that wild? Do you think it was because you
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  Speaker 1: didn't feel that way about yourself? Do you think that
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  Speaker 1: playing these roles has given you that sort of like
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  Speaker 1: freedom to walk in a room and own it or
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  Speaker 1: do you think that has just come because of age
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  Speaker 1: and in your evolution.
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  Speaker 2: I think it's both both.
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  Speaker 3: I do I think it's I think there is something
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  Speaker 3: incredibly First, it's terrifying your fifties. Then it becomes like
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  Speaker 3: really freeing and then it becomes like this fast warp
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  Speaker 3: speed to make up for the years when you were
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  Speaker 3: afraid of it. Like that's the way I've kind of
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: seen it, and I was like, oh my god. My
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  Speaker 3: first three years of my fifties was like I was
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: sitting here just dumbfounded every day like what what?
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  Speaker 2: What? What? I was just like every day I'm like,
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  Speaker 2: what is? Who is? What is happening? Nobody's okay, you know.
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  Speaker 3: And so now I feel like, oh my god, I've
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: got to make up for those three years that I
• 18:43
  Speaker 3: was so confused and lost, and that then becomes that
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: hamster wheel of like come on, come on, come on,
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: plants all the seat seat seat seat spread and spread them.
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  Speaker 2: Let's go, let's go. So yeah, I think it's been both.
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  Speaker 1: Because when you were younger, did you have like a
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: deep need to please, like, because we both grew up,
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I mean, we know each other, we've known each other
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: for a long time, and we've both been in the
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: industry for a really long time. Did you feel like
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: the needs for everyone to like you, whether you know
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: it as partners or people on set or the public.
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  Speaker 1: Because I fell into that and it's really exhausting, you know,
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  Speaker 1: and you kind of grow into yourself and realize that
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  Speaker 1: being the good girl is overrated and it kind of
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: keeps you from developing into the woman that you are
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  Speaker 1: meant to be.
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  Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I think people pleasing is definitely a youthful activity,
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  Speaker 3: you know. I do think that that is the first
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  Speaker 3: thing that starts to go away when you have given
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  Speaker 3: yourself the permission to put yourself first. And a lot
• 19:54
  Speaker 3: of that doesn't come until if you happen to have
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  Speaker 3: a family, that you realize the kids are okay on
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  Speaker 3: their own. Right there, there's definitely that shift that happens,
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: and if you don't have a family, the shift still
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: happens because of the reaction of society to you and
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: about you and your age. So no matter what, the
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: shift happens, where all of a sudden you're like, I'm sorry,
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: why do I Why am I caring more about how
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: you feel about me? Shouldn't I be caring more about
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  Speaker 3: how I feel about myself?
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  Speaker 2: And then react to how I will.
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: Even take your criticism or your you know what I mean? Like, So, yeah,
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  Speaker 3: I do think the people pleasing shifts with age because
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: you're like, what do I need from you? Why am
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: I being nice to you? What's what is this about?
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  Speaker 2: Right?
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  Speaker 1: It is so true because you and then that's just
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  Speaker 1: it's the beauty of getting older and wiser and you know,
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: really being able to assess all of your life's experiences,
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: especially like if you have had kids and you you
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: kept them alive and you turn them out into the world,
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: like you're like, oh my god, whoof I mean, even
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: if it's if you're a dog mom or whatever, it
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: is that you feel like this like accomplishment, the sense
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: of pride in what you are capable of at a
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: certain point that you don't really feel until you get there.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think like that thing that makes me
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: the most mad, which is definitely a learning curve, which
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: is what we talked about at the beginning, Like that
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: all the experience you've had, whether it's on screen, off screen,
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: at a desk, not at a desk wherever, that you
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: get here and it doesn't fucking help you. That has
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: been the hardest thing for me to even comprehend, like
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: what you're talking about, like do we ever get to relax?
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: Do we ever get to rest on our laurels? Do
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: we ever get to go.
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: I've done a lot of stuff whether you've worked on yourself,
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: whether you've worked you know in the career that you've
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: chosen and you've succeeded. You get here and you're like, wait,
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: am I starting over?
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: How am I starting over?
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: When you know I've been doing this for so long
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: and yet now everyone looks at me like.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: Huh, what do I do with you now? Right? And
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: like that's been for me the hardest thing.
• 22:48
  Speaker 3: So I'm like, oh, I get it now why women
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: form production companies and start finding their own content and
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: start buying ips and because we don't want to wait
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: around anymore.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: That's right. That's exactly the way I felt when I
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: turned fifty and like maybe like fifty one fifty two,
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: I started to be able to understand it and take
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: action because it was it was a lot to accept
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: and believe, you know, in yourself. But we all go
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: through that. Constance and I have been friends forever and
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: we are still learning from one another. I hope you
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: are too. We are going to continue this conversation. Part
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: two will come out soon.