Latest / The Inner Wealth Podcast / Ep117. Mastering Peace Within The Pressure: Navigating Stress-Free Success.
Transcript
- 0:03Speaker 1: This is Mike Kitco and I'm a small business owner just like you.
- 0:06Speaker 1: I'll never be a hustle, horror, grind guru, but I do believe in having it all health, wealth and a life full of love.
- 0:12Speaker 1: Struggle is not the goal and sacrifice is not glamorous.
- 0:15Speaker 1: I like the path of least resistance.
- 0:18Speaker 1: It just takes a shift in mindset and the beliefs you hold.
- 0:21Speaker 1: You believe that you need to sacrifice now to have what you want later, or do you believe that you can have it all all the time?
- 0:27Speaker 1: Does your beliefs create your outcomes?
- 0:29Speaker 1: I choose to feel wealthy, successful and happy every day, and you get to choose for yourself.
- 0:35Speaker 1: Welcome to lead.
- 0:36Speaker 1: Love, profit play where small business owners learn and choose to have it all and choose to create success without distress.
- 0:43Speaker 1: Hey look, I love creating more wealth and more success in my life.
- 0:51Speaker 1: It's a fulfilling feeling when you wake up and you do something you love and you make a difference in somebody's life.
- 1:04Speaker 1: You help other people raise the quality of their life and improve the conditions in their life and you help them get into alignment.
- 1:15Speaker 1: You see radical change happening in the lives of the people that you're working with.
- 1:20Speaker 1: At the same time, your bank account is being positively impacted as well.
- 1:26Speaker 1: That's a lot of fun, this whole success and wealth game.
- 1:32Speaker 1: Man, it's a ball, it's a hoot.
- 1:36Speaker 1: It's very fulfilling and very rewarding when you do it right.
- 1:41Speaker 1: And I did say when you do it right, because there's a time where we were making a lot of money and we were doing really well financially and I would say that I was successful in worldly terms, but in reality, I was dying from the inside out.
- 1:55Speaker 1: I mean, there was nothing good in my life except my bank account and we thought we had life figured out.
- 2:04Speaker 1: Like we were crushing life, even though our marriage was in absolute shambles and we were fighting and threatening divorce all the time and we were physically, mentally, emotionally, abusing each other on a daily basis, where our home environment was complete destruction and I hated my job, I hated where I was going to work and I hated what I was doing.
- 2:26Speaker 1: I just my health.
- 2:27Speaker 1: I was 300 pounds, I was drinking at ridiculous levels, like there was nothing good in my life except my bank account kept increasing and, man, I thought I was crushing it.
- 2:37Speaker 1: We thought we were crushing it and really we.
- 2:39Speaker 1: It was just a complete disaster and in 2016, we hit the reset right.
- 2:46Speaker 1: If you listen to this podcast.
- 2:47Speaker 1: You've heard this.
- 2:47Speaker 1: Before we hit the reset, we started to try to figure out like okay, that's not working.
- 2:52Speaker 1: None of that shit's working.
- 2:53Speaker 1: Let's build this from the ground up.
- 2:55Speaker 1: And we literally hit a reset on our entire life and, in our Choose your Destiny intensive workshops, got one coming up in on November 18th and 19th in right outside of St Louis, missouri, and another on January 27th and 28th in 2024 in the same place right outside of St Louis.
- 3:14Speaker 1: If you're interested in learning how to reset everything in your life, or how to transform your life, or even how to get from here to there, or how to increase your wealth, or how to positively impact more people, or how about transition from a corporate career into an entrepreneurial career, if you're interested in anything where there's you're looking to upgrade the circumstances in your life like, jump on the website innerwealthglobalcom, forward, slash choose your destiny and come join us.
- 3:44Speaker 1: I'd love to see you there.
- 3:45Speaker 1: I teach people how to do what I did and what we did in our lives, but In worldly terms, we were successful because I had a big title, I had hundreds of people that worked for me, I had a really, really nice salary and got nice bonuses and we had some money.
- 4:06Speaker 1: But the point being is, when you hate everything about life, none of that shit makes sense.
- 4:12Speaker 1: None of it makes sense.
- 4:14Speaker 1: The money is not worth your lack of happiness and your lack of freedom and your, like you hate doing anything in your life.
- 4:22Speaker 1: It's like that payoff is not worth it.
- 4:26Speaker 1: But when I hit the reset, I think what I really wanted was I wanted to be able to wake up and enjoy every second of every day that I live, and that is the life that I chose to design.
- 4:44Speaker 1: And when I designed that life, I began creating that life, and it sounds daunting, but it really is a lot easier than you think.
- 4:54Speaker 1: You've just got to be willing to give up things that aren't in alignment with your new direction and your new vision and connect with things that are in alignment with your new vision and your new direction.
- 5:04Speaker 1: And over time, when you stay committed to the things that serve your greater alignment, your greater purpose, your life starts to blossom and take shape.
- 5:14Speaker 1: And, like this, life is pretty magical.
- 5:16Speaker 1: Life wants for you what you want for yourself.
- 5:18Speaker 1: So all you got to do is decide and then you'll start to see the circumstances in your life shift around your new decision.
- 5:23Speaker 1: Anyway, one of the things that I decided is I'm never going to sign up to do shit that I hate, ever again.
- 5:36Speaker 1: And when you listen to the introduction that is podcast, I think it is the last line of the intro says I choose to have success without the stress.
- 5:46Speaker 1: So that's what this episode is about.
- 5:49Speaker 1: It's about stress.
- 5:50Speaker 1: Now, the human body is not designed and not equipped to be under constant stress and be healthy and remain healthy.
- 6:03Speaker 1: Now, stress is useful because what stress is for it is for those fight or flight situations when something is threatening you, where there is imminent danger.
- 6:17Speaker 1: Your body is naturally wired to go into a fear response to get you out of dodge and to get you into a place where you're safe, to throw adrenaline and cortisol and a whole bunch of stress hormones into your system so that you have increased levels of energy and you have increased levels of a vitality and increased levels of awareness, so that you can go on hyper alert, so that you can escape or you can get out of the dangerous environment and get into a more peaceful, healthy, safe environment.
- 6:58Speaker 1: So stress is the thing that helps you do that.
- 7:01Speaker 1: So stress is useful, but it's not meant to be a normal condition in your life and in those first 43 years of my life, it was nothing but stress.
- 7:14Speaker 1: It's like the stress turned on when I was a child and it never turned off until I understood what was happening in my mind and my body, that I was always in this hyper visual and state, this hyper awareness state, this hyper aggressive state, this scared state, and I was just running and running and running and I wasn't getting anywhere.
- 7:38Speaker 1: I was making a lot of money but I wasn't getting anywhere.
- 7:42Speaker 1: It was almost like there was a promise that at some point that stress would turn off.
- 7:46Speaker 1: And that's not how life works.
- 7:48Speaker 1: Life doesn't.
- 7:49Speaker 1: You don't get to a place and then the stress turns off like forever.
- 7:55Speaker 1: You must choose to allow the stress to turn off, and that's what mindfulness is about and that's what the East figured out a long time ago.
- 8:07Speaker 1: With mindfulness and with higher states of consciousness and higher states of awareness, spiritual evolution.
- 8:16Speaker 1: So there's wealth and success and it's creating that.
- 8:19Speaker 1: But also you can evolve as a human being along the way to the state where you don't need the stress to create success.
- 8:27Speaker 1: So that's what this episode is about.
- 8:31Speaker 1: It's about creating success without the stress, but I wanna tell you a story.
- 8:38Speaker 1: So this just happened yesterday and I'm gonna paint a picture.
- 8:43Speaker 1: So in my backyard I've got a fence right, we've got a couple dogs, so I've got a fence, a fenced yard, pretty much a privacy fence, and I've got three trees.
- 8:54Speaker 1: And I got three.
- 8:55Speaker 1: They're called balding cypress trees and they're in my backyard and if you know what a balding cypress tree is, it looks like a pine tree, like an evergreen tree, that where there's needles there's no leaves, there's needles, and it looks like this thing should stay green all year round and it doesn't.
- 9:14Speaker 1: In the fall, right around now, the needles all turn brown and they all drop, and then in the spring new needles are born on this tree and they stay there the entire summer until they turn brown in the fall and they drop.
- 9:31Speaker 1: So these needles drop into my yard and my dogs go out into the yard and run through these needles and they're Cavalier King Charles Spaniels, so they've got a lot of hair on them and when they go out they just get these needles all stuck in there and they're fricking hair and they're fur and just a mess.
- 9:52Speaker 1: So I've got to keep the yard when these needles start to fall.
- 9:55Speaker 1: I've got to constantly rake this yard.
- 9:57Speaker 1: Not, it's actually something I kind of enjoy, but I gotta rake the yard and then I burn.
- 10:00Speaker 1: I have a fire pit so I burn these needles.
- 10:03Speaker 1: Well, in the spring, when the needles are being born, so the branches, the bottom branches, every year for 10 years now we've lived here almost 11 years, but for 10 years the bottom layer of branches get a little heavier and they start to sag and I cut down these branches so that when I'm mowing or when I'm in my backyard or when I'm walking around my backyard like I don't have to duck the tree so I keep them like maybe seven feet, because I'm six foot tall.
- 10:37Speaker 1: So I cut down these branches and I put these branches in the corner of my yard, in the far left corner of my yard, in the fenced area, and right in the fall what I do.
- 10:50Speaker 1: So that happens in the summer and they turn brown, they die, and in the fall I burn them.
- 10:57Speaker 1: I put them in my fire pit and I burn them.
- 11:00Speaker 1: Now what happens usually?
- 11:01Speaker 1: Like when I moved to the Midwest, our neighbors taught us how to be Midwesterners.
- 11:06Speaker 1: So what you do is when you wanna start a fire, or you put a bunch of wood in there, you put gasoline over top.
- 11:12Speaker 1: Don't do this.
- 11:13Speaker 1: I don't recommend this to anybody.
- 11:15Speaker 1: Like you put gasoline on the wood and you burn it, you start it and it just takes off and it just gets.
- 11:23Speaker 1: It almost explodes.
- 11:24Speaker 1: That's like I guess when I was taught how to be a Midwester, that's what they said no, you don't take like half an hour to start a fire.
- 11:32Speaker 1: You start it in like 30 seconds or less.
- 11:35Speaker 1: Anyway, the point being is it was a way to rush to get the fire lit and what I would do is I would pour gasoline over the fire, over the wood, some of the old wood that was in the fire pit, and I would burn the wood that was in there, or put gasoline and light that go up in flames.
- 12:00Speaker 1: Then I would walk over and I'd start to walk and grab the twigs, these branches, and I would put them over the fire pit.
- 12:08Speaker 1: And the fire pit's only about what three or four feet wide, like in diameter, so I would put these branches over top of it and set them on top, and then it would burn the branches, but the outside would fall out of the fire pit and I'd have the fire going really, really heavy and really, really hard.
- 12:30Speaker 1: The fire was just lit crazy and it was a mess and a lot of times the branches would be on fire and they'd fall out of the pit because I'd just set them on top and then I'd clean them up, I'd put them inside.
- 12:42Speaker 1: And when I wasn't very smart when I planned out the fire pit, because there's a little bit of a tree right over top of it, so it would burn so high that it would start to really kill the leaves and the needles on the tree above and it was just a fricking mess.
- 13:04Speaker 1: So, because I needed the rush, because I was trying to hurry, because I was trying to finish this activity like fast, I would burn more than the fire pit could handle.
- 13:16Speaker 1: It would get out of the fire pit and burn the grass around the fire pit, it would burn the tree up top and I would lose because I was trying to carry so much from the fence into the fire pit.
- 13:28Speaker 1: I would make a mess between the fence and the fire pit and all of this.
- 13:35Speaker 1: It was messy.
- 13:36Speaker 1: It was just a messy, messy process.
- 13:38Speaker 1: And yesterday, when I started doing this, I started doing the same thing Put a little gasoline on the fire.
- 13:45Speaker 1: I wouldn't recommend that to anybody.
- 13:46Speaker 1: Don't do that.
- 13:48Speaker 1: Don't be me.
- 13:48Speaker 1: I would put a little gasoline just to get it started and I started the fire and I started walking back and forth and I started grabbing big piles of these branches to put them on the fire pit and I started making a mess and I started seeing the mess I was making and then I started thinking to myself.
- 14:07Speaker 1: I had this thought, this insight.
- 14:08Speaker 1: It said why are you rushing?
- 14:10Speaker 1: What's the hurry?
- 14:12Speaker 1: Why are you going so fast?
- 14:15Speaker 1: Because in reality it was in the morning.
- 14:18Speaker 1: It was about 7.30 in the morning and I was under my gazebo on my back deck.
- 14:24Speaker 1: I was sitting on the couch under my gazebo and I got up, I went over to the pile and started this process of burning the branches and my whole plan was, after I was finished, I was gonna go sit back down under my gazebo on my couch and return to exactly doing what I was doing before, which was nothing, just contemplating, meditating, Having my morning mindfulness time with my cup of coffee, and I was trying to hurry through this process and I couldn't come up with a good reason why I was in such a rush to get through this process but, for whatever reason, I was trying to walk as fast as I could between the wood pile and the fire pit and I was going back and forth so fast but I had nowhere to get to quickly.
- 15:20Speaker 1: But I was in a rush and I started the process, making a fricking mess, like I normally do every year.
- 15:28Speaker 1: And when I had this insight that there was nowhere to get to in a hurry and that I was rushing for no reason whatsoever, I slowed down and I slowed down my pace and I started grabbing smaller piles and I started breaking the piles up or breaking the branches, breaking the wood down into smaller pieces, and I began setting it on the fire so it didn't make a mess outside of the fire.
- 15:59Speaker 1: And instead of needing five paths, the walk back and forth, five traveling paths back and forth I probably did 12, but I slowed down and I enjoyed each step that I was taking and I brought myself to a state of joy and happiness and peace, realizing there was nowhere to get to and there was no need.
- 16:29Speaker 1: No need to rush, no reason to rush, but for whatever reason, it's almost like my body and my mind are naturally wired to be impatient and the rush and to try to hurry up and get somewhere, like Like I've got a run through life to get somewhere and then when I get there, I run through life to get somewhere else.
- 16:51Speaker 1: And my entire life has been a race To try to see how fast I could get to where I was going so that I could rush to the next thing.
- 17:01Speaker 1: And and in this exercise I slowed down and I started enjoying the process and I I felt a sense of peace and calm and enjoyment From this that I'd never experienced before.
- 17:17Speaker 1: It's the first time in 10 years that I actually enjoyed that process.
- 17:23Speaker 1: And I know it seems very, very simple and I you might.
- 17:28Speaker 1: You might not even connect with this story at all, but the point that I'm trying to make is Impatience causes stress.
- 17:40Speaker 1: Impatience causes unnecessary stress in the body and in a lot of cases You're impatient for no reason.
- 17:49Speaker 1: We as human beings are impatient for no reason whatsoever, but that impatience will increase the amount of cortisol and adrenaline that's in your body and when you drive these hormones in your body for sustained periods of time Over the course of your lifetime, you're gonna eat yourself from the inside out.
- 18:11Speaker 1: Take a look At your daily activity, take a look at your work, take a look at your workout, take a look at, maybe, your meals.
- 18:27Speaker 1: Are you always in a rush?
- 18:28Speaker 1: Do you hurry through things?
- 18:30Speaker 1: Do you set goals that could take Years and you try to get them all done in six months and then beat the fuck out of yourself when not only do you do not get there, but that you're You're absolutely frickin out of juice and out of energy and and uninspired when you get there.
- 18:53Speaker 1: Do you?
- 18:56Speaker 1: Do you live life so fast and so hot and so and so just In in such a place of hurry up and rush and faster that you're not enjoying the process of breathing and living.
- 19:14Speaker 1: It's almost like the destination.
- 19:19Speaker 1: When we get to the destination, we're gonna be there.
- 19:23Speaker 1: But I challenge you to take a look at when you write as you're arriving to a destination and by destination and by destination I mean goal.
- 19:31Speaker 1: When you're arriving at a goal or a destination right before you get there, you probably set a different target and move the target, move the goal, so that you never really arrived and you never really give yourself time to just relax, to enjoy life.
- 19:47Speaker 1: There's always somewhere else to get to, always somewhere else to get to, always somewhere else to get to, and and you just keep delaying your, your joy, your enjoyment, your satisfaction.
- 19:58Speaker 1: You keep keep pushing out the target, you push out the goal, you push out the destination, so that you never really arrived and you never really allow yourself to enjoy your life.
- 20:10Speaker 1: And that's how I live life for my first 43 years and yesterday I saw that up in some areas I'm still doing that.
- 20:21Speaker 1: My mastermind there's 49 total students in our mastermind and we have like spousal units, spousal teams.
- 20:33Speaker 1: So when somebody registers in our mastermind, their spouse, their committed partner, comes with them for free and no cost to be in the mastermind.
- 20:42Speaker 1: So we probably have somewhere around 27 seats that are filled in our mastermind.
- 20:49Speaker 1: But we have, we have close to 50 people and the target our goal is to is to get to 100 seats filled.
- 20:59Speaker 1: That's our target.
- 21:01Speaker 1: And and I wanted, when I, when I just let myself like go back to default, mike, I want to be there yesterday and in some cases I'm a little hard on myself from time to time because, because I haven't arrived at the 100 seats yet, and whenever I start to like get a little, not hard, I shouldn't have said hard on myself.
- 21:30Speaker 1: I like I get a little frustrated about that.
- 21:34Speaker 1: Not hard on myself, I just get a little frustrated.
- 21:36Speaker 1: And whenever I get a little frustrated and people sense it, they make sure especially my students.
- 21:42Speaker 1: They make sure that I know that the work we do together is awesome.
- 21:48Speaker 1: The growth that we've experienced has been awesome and the work that we do together, like the impact that we're having together and the lives that are changing, they're all awesome and I'm just not taking time to enjoy it fully.
- 22:05Speaker 1: And when they, when they remind me of how much we have grown and how much like the journey has been awesome from the impact that we're making, I've got to got to take a little breather.
- 22:18Speaker 1: I take a little breath and say it's time to enjoy what I've already done and and stop delaying the joy of of this number might take me a year to get to 100.
- 22:31Speaker 1: It might take us five years and in fact, the timeline doesn't matter Because my lack.
- 22:38Speaker 1: My life lacks nothing right now.
- 22:41Speaker 1: My life lacks nothing right now.
- 22:47Speaker 1: I was on a was on a call with one of my private clients today and and we were talking about like are you operating from a deficit or are you just putting more on the pile when we're talking about money.
- 22:59Speaker 1: Some people they're operating from a deficit, they're in debt and they're trying to get back to to ground, but like the normal ground and the way I visualize this, they're.
- 23:11Speaker 1: It's a hole there.
- 23:12Speaker 1: They're literally trying to make money to fill in the hole.
- 23:15Speaker 1: But there's also people that I work with that are there's a map.
- 23:18Speaker 1: They have a mountain of cash and the money that they make and the cash that they make, they just throw it on the pile.
- 23:23Speaker 1: Operating from a deficit is survival mode.
- 23:28Speaker 1: Throwing onto the pile is creation mode.
- 23:33Speaker 1: But what happens is sometimes when, when we're throwing onto the pile, we like, we almost like put ourselves in survival mode, thinking that we've got to hurry up and get somewhere, even though we're just, we're in bonus.
- 23:47Speaker 1: We're just putting money on the pile of money.
- 23:50Speaker 1: We're not trying to.
- 23:52Speaker 1: We're not trying to just fill in the hole, fill in a hole in our life.
- 23:59Speaker 1: And I don't have a hole in my life, I don't have a lack in my life, I need nothing.
- 24:02Speaker 1: So getting from 27 to 100, it's not going to get me anything that I don't already have.
- 24:09Speaker 1: So if I'm not enjoying the journey of getting from 27 to 100, then I'm doing it all wrong.
- 24:16Speaker 1: And there's no rush to close that gap.
- 24:19Speaker 1: And if we try to rush, we're being impatient.
- 24:23Speaker 1: And if we're being impatient, it increases the adrenaline, the cortisol, in your body.
- 24:27Speaker 1: And if you live in that state for a sustained period of time, you, your body, is is basically eating itself from the inside out, because your body can handle being in that high state of of stress for long periods of time, for long durations.
- 24:44Speaker 1: Our body is only meant to be in a stressful situation for a very short burst and to return back to peace.
- 24:51Speaker 1: We can create wealth, we can create success, we can impact this world, and we can do all of that without stress.
- 25:03Speaker 1: And that's what I mean when I say success without the stress.
- 25:07Speaker 1: If your, if your body is running hot, if you're running hot all the time, if you're trying to get somewhere fast, if you're always in fast mode, if you're always in faster, more sooner, then like, dive deep and understand what stories you're telling yourself and what, what, what are you trying to solve by getting somewhere as fast as you possibly can.
- 25:33Speaker 1: That's robbing you of the joy of the present moment.
- 25:36Speaker 1: Think about that for your life, guys.
- 25:40Speaker 1: Thanks for listening, thanks for jamming.
- 25:42Speaker 1: If you're interested in choose your destiny, go to the website wwwinterwealthglobalcom and choose your destiny.
- 25:50Speaker 1: We've got the the event coming up November 18th and 19th and January 27th 28th.
- 25:57Speaker 1: I would love to see you there.
- 25:58Speaker 1: These things are awesome.
- 25:59Speaker 1: They're life changing.
- 26:00Speaker 1: They are game changing.
- 26:01Speaker 1: They reshape the way I live and the way I navigate life, and they will for you to.
- 26:05Speaker 1: If you enjoyed what you heard and you want to learn more, go to wwwinterwealthglobalcom for more tools and resources.