Latest / Carmedy / Episode #3 - Heatwave

Transcript

Episode #3 - Heatwave · Carmedy

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Carmody Podcast, where comedy meets yourslash my commute.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: I am your host, Dave Thompson.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: I hope y'all are doing well today.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: It's a beautiful day, a beautiful Saturday morning, and here we are in the car, episode three.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: If you've never listened to Carmedy before, Carmody can get a little noisy, can get a little crazy.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: You never know what's gonna happen because I'm driving in the car.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's Carmedy.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'm driving in the car.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: A few episodes ago, there was a bunk bed that fell out of someone's truck and I almost died.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: You never know what's gonna happen.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: You might go through a drive-thru with me, you might get into some road rage with me, we might get hit by a car.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: God forbid.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: But still, you never know what's gonna happen.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: But what I ask is please enjoy this in your car.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: And there's no video because I don't want you to be distracted whilst you're driving.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Listen to the audio.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you have fun.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: This is gonna be fun.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I just I just gotta get this off my chest.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: I've recorded this episode twice already.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be honest with you.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: I recorded it twice.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: For some reason, this voice recording app in my iPhone just doesn't want to work sometimes.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know why.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yesterday I did the full 30-minute episode and it stopped at 11 minutes, and I didn't realize it because I was driving, and yeah, I was freaking bummed because I was cooking, I was cooking for real, for real.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: And then now here we are, it's just what it is.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: And look, this is what I'll say, folks.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: I was in the shower this morning, because believe it or not, I do shower every day in the morning.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: I was in the shower this morning, and as I was washing my body, I noticed something different in my shower, and that was that my kids' body wash for my children was turned because normally I look at the label, like the front label of it that has like the little characters on it or whatever.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: It was turned backwards to where it had the white label on it with all the ingredients and all that stuff, and I noticed at the top it said danger for external use only for external use only.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, we all get what's going on here for external use only.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's just talk about this for a moment.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: I I was wondering what are they meaning by that exactly?
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like, are they saying like don't wash your butthole with this?
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: Cause it can make you sick?
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: Cause that's what I would think, like, if people was washing something internally, like is it like don't don't don't wash out your butthole with the with the with the body wash?
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like obvious you think like don't put it in your mouth.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: Like I know it's for kids, but like kids aren't reading the labels, so I'm assuming it's probably for adults.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: But I noticed that this is on every bottle, whether it's for kids or adults, it's on every bottle for external use only.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: So I looked it up.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: I looked it up.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: Why for external use?
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: Why is that on there?
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: And it's because it's called body wash, and so they don't want some people to be confused that it's for your entire body, including the inside.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: Apparently, back in the day when body wash was invented, some people, because it was a liquid that smells good, thought, some people thought, somebody somewhere thought, because it's called body wash, then it's to wash out your body.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: So they ingested it to wash out their digestive tract.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: They swallowed it, they they drank and swallowed it because it's a wash, it's a wash, it's not harmful, it's supposed to wash my body.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: I was told this was clean and this was safe, and it's to wash out my body.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: What more would I like to wash out than my digestion system?
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: And then that didn't go well for that person.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think they were pooping bubbles.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they were.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they were pooping bubbles.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, your body doesn't want that, and it immediately says the effects, you know, vomiting, nausea, diarrhea, death, no big deal.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: So just don't try and clean out your gut with body wash.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: I I think that's fair that you don't do that.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, because I could only imagine if I was a first responder and I had to go to a call.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, I'm trying to find a pen.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, if I had to go to a call where there was some idiot that freaking was drinking body wash, and it's like, oh, we gotta pump his stomach now because he's drinking body wash, and I'm saying he because clearly a woman would not do this.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: The woman would have to be like mentally disabled or something to do something like this.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: Women are just smarter than men.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_00: It is what it is.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: In in most things.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: Not everything, but most things.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I'm just mind-blown.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: That's the thought process.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like, once once it like once I saw it written, then I was like, okay.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I I understand how somebody could get there, I guess.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's called body wash, like, let's see how it works in the rest of inside my body.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so I guess technically I I understand that.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's what it is.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: Um, other things to talk about.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_00: I was at a show, and you ever have um a situation where somebody like that you don't know tries to like big dog you?
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: You ever have that?
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you don't even know them, like, and they're just trying to like say big things to you, like about what they've done and accomplished, and it just makes you feel kind of like weird and gross.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if that's the same thing for everybody.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I think it might activate something different in everyone.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, maybe for some of you it makes you kind of want to retaliate and respond by also saying things that you've done to kind of like one up them, but like it's it's kind of like a it's just like a it's like a braggy, like weird thing for me.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: You know, like if somebody came up to me and and they're like, hey, my name's so-and-so, and I was like, hey, nice to meet you, my name's blah blah blah, and um they were like, Yeah, like uh, you know, you're doing the show, like, yeah, I'm doing the show, and they'd be like, Yeah, I should I should have been on this show, you know.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'd s I have you know, don't tell credits and comedy store credits and you know multiple headlining spots and I do spots all over, but they didn't even they didn't even ask me.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: I t I told them I was coming, they didn't even ask me.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what am I supposed to say?
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: You know, now you put me in a weird spot.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: Now I just introduced myself and you know I'm on the show, and you're like, oh, I should have been on the show because I showed up.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: My presence.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: My presence is here.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's not how it works, buddy boy.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: That's not how it freaking works.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know what you should do?
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: And this pisses me off so bad.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: This pisses me.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: Can I look, I hope you guys listen to this and you call out people that you see doing this because it's annoying.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: Stop posting on your freaking Instagram status.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: What's good tonight?
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: What's good tonight?
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: What's good tonight?
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: Freaking find a show and go support.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: What's good tonight?
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: I know so many people that they'll be like, I will not go out unless I'm booked.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: Alright.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: Go ahead.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: But you know what's a surefire way to continue not getting booked?
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Not going out, you dingus.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: What's wrong with you?
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Freaking dingus?
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I used to do?
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: When I first started, I probably discussed this before.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it was on the the previous iteration of the podcast, but what I used to do is I used to find shows, like I'm talking brand new.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like months in.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: I used to find shows, show up to the show, introduce myself, told them, told them that I was a young comedian, that I was uh very, very new, that I only maybe had five minutes, maybe, or eight minutes, whatever.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: And uh five minutes for sure at the beginning.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: And that's only if they asked.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: I would tell them I'm just there to support.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: If they asked me, like, oh, you want to do some time, like how much do you have?
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: I would, I would, I would not say a lot.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like five, six minutes, maybe eight minutes.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I would just hang out at shows, and there was so many shows, I gotta, I gotta just tell you guys, there were so many shows that I went to that I did not perform on.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: So many.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: Some people might say that's a waste of time, but I don't think so because at the end of the day, if we're all working with each other for a long time, like these are your peers, if you're if your foundation of what your peers know about you is that you're somebody that has supported them even when you were too inexperienced to handle the show, and and you were supporting them even then, and then now that you're a little bit more experienced, they're gonna want you to do shows with them.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_00: They're gonna want you to pull up and do shows with them, and they're gonna consider you because they remember that you supported them, and that you repost their stuff, or you did a video about the show, or told people to come out, or invited people.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you came with somebody, you brought a friend, like all of that stuff is good.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's all good networking, it's all a good way to show love and support to other people that are around you.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: You might not think they're the funniest people in the world because they're probably not, just like we're not the funniest people in the world who go to the shows, but it there is something to be said for people that go without any expectation.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I I tell people all the time I'm I'm coming to a show, I let them know ahead of time.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: If there's somebody that drops out, now they know I'm coming, and and and they can make a decision there whether they would want to book me because they know I'm coming, or maybe they are gonna book somebody else anyway.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's up to them.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: But at the very least, what do I get out of it?
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um I get to enjoy comedy as a fan, I get to help support people around me, and that's something that I think is very important, and I think that that's enough.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: That really is enough.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes you just need to be kind to people and help support the people around you, and that helps networking.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: It really does.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: And uh it is a great way to meet other people, you know, like I'll all might put up pull up to a show, and maybe there's six people on the show, and three of them I know, and three of them I don't know.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you'll say hi to everybody, and then you'll introduce yourself to the other people, and usually nine times out of ten, they'll ask, Oh, are you on the show?
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's like eh, nope, just supporting, and then now you get to let them know that you're there to support.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not there just you know, waiting five minutes into the show if somebody's gonna ask me to do a spot or not, and then just leave.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm here for the show.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: And then you get to meet other people, and then those people know that you are supporting a show, and then those people, maybe you want to book them in the future, maybe you want to work with them in the future, and they already have an established foundation of you supporting shows.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, for people that have been in comedy longer than me, that are maybe listening to this, maybe not listening to this, this probably doesn't apply to you because I don't think you're just gonna start doing this.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're listening and you are maybe newer than me in comedy and you're less than a year or something, please listen to this.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_00: Because I see so many people not doing this, and they just talk about it like, oh, who could get me on a spot tonight?
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_00: Who can get me on a spot tonight?
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: Like, go out there and support.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: Like, and here's the other here's the other part of it, right?
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: Me going in with no expectation and not nagging about a spot made it so I actually ended up getting a lot of spots, and I still do it made me establish those relationships to where there's a lot of those people now that I feel comfortable hitting them up because I see they have a show, and I'll ask them, hey, I I'm getting ready for this certain thing, and I would love to try out a few jokes.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: If I pulled up to support the show and reshared it, do you mind if I do five minutes?
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_00: And they would say yes, and they do say yes, and and I have that relationship with them now because I've supported them and I'm gonna continue to support them, and now they support me.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think that's a great thing to do with everybody around you, right?
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I I've tried to get out to as many shows as possible.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_00: Pretty much every producer in the IE, I've been to one of their shows without being booked, with the exception of a few, and that's not for any reason other than I just haven't had the time to get out to their particular show.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't been up to Lake Arrowhead yet to go to first dibs.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I would like to go up to Lake Arrowhead to go to first dibs.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I've heard Geneva runs a wonderful show up there.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_00: She's a very funny comic, she's a great producer.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I haven't been to a Loudburger show yet to show support.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, Hunter Sergio um haven't been over there to do that.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: Just jokes of comedy.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Um I've been to a Buddy System show at Strum.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_00: I've been to multiple swag-of shows, I've been to multiple um silly mannered shows, obviously.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: I've been up with Davy the Don.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, I mean, I I know there's more, I'm forgetting the COC, all them.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's just you know, it's great to get out and support and to show up and and you know start networking and getting along with people.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: These are people that we're gonna be next to, and I was hearing that as I was listening to these classes, you know, about stand-up on YouTube, and they'd be like, Yeah, like these are your peers, and they're gonna be around you all the time, so be kind to people.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what I want to do.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: You know, there's definitely a few times I think I missed the mark with a few people, not that I was like necessarily trying to be mean or anything, but just like maybe interactions that weren't the best.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, or maybe I said something that later on I thought like, man, I wish I would have said something else.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_00: But I think overall, I I think I I've been pretty um pretty kind to people, and I hope that people know that I I I love being supportive and that I love to um you know help inspire people with the the drive that I have and to you know help support and and help them in any way I can.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm still really new to this still, you know.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I feel like I don't know what I'm talking about, and I'm sure that there's a lot of things I probably don't.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: These are just thoughts that I have now.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe 10 years from now I'm gonna look back and be like, this freaking idiot, what's he talking about?
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_00: Being supportive of these people, these people aren't supportive of him, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: You know what, but you know, for now, for now, I'm really happy with where I'm at.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'm really happy with um the connections I've built, and I'm I'm I'm really excited um about this festival I'm planning and my upcoming tour.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, the tour comes first.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_00: Let's talk about that.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_00: So the Heat Wave Comedy Tour I started last year.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_00: It was myself, Melissa Nami, and Pierce Samaro.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: We went out and we went to multiple spots all over Southern California, and we had an absolute ball.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: It was super fun.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: We had over 200 people show up uh between all of our shows, and it was so fun to be able to hang out with these people and to get repeat customers.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: We had some some people that that saw us once and came and brought other people and saw us again, which was amazing.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: And the different comics that we helped put on and we booked for those shows as well was super super fun, and it was awesome to do, and I'm really excited about doing it this year.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: So this year I've expanded it.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_00: Not only is it myself, Melissa, and Pierce, but we also added on the two mics, Mike Baker and Mike James.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um, Mike Baker, Blue Bancher comedy, he's a super, super funny guy.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: He's won Set of the Night at Ontario Improv.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: He's been in the finals of Set of the Night at the comedy store.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_00: Just uh hosted and performed at the Ice House Legendary Room.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_00: Mike James, he's the other half of Silly Mannered with Melissa.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: Uh they they run multiple shows uh Riverside uh Ontario.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_00: Super funny guys performed at the improv.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: He's he's got a joke.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna tell you guys right now.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: If you guys ever get the chance to see Mike James, you gotta see this guy.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_00: He has a joke about history between him and his wife, and it it's it's one of the funniest jokes, uh, one of the top jokes from the IE.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be honest with you guys.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, there's there's a there's a tier list in my mind of the funniest jokes in the IE that people say that or and that people work on regularly.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: And for me, it's one of the I'm not saying it's the funniest, I'm saying it's one of the funniest concepts of a joke.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so if you ever get the chance to see Mike James, definitely check him out.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_00: He's the T-H-E-E Mike James on Instagram.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely give him a follow, check him out.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know, he he he performs all over the place, and he's freaking hilarious.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I love the guy, he's really, really awesome, really great guy.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, so I'm excited about this tour.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we're we're just finalizing places and ironing out dates um for the tour.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm excited to do that, to go out with my friends and for us to go around Southern California and perform to the different communities around the IE and maybe OCLA, different places.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm excited, it's gonna be really cool.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I'm just excited about all the talented people out here um and and to help put them on at the IE comedy festival and to have these showcases.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm gonna invite people from like industry people from Hollywood from LA to come out to see these showcases, and I hope they show up so that they can see just how funny some of these freaky people are, I guess, um, that be doing all these mics.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_00: Because in the IE we really are spoiled, we do have quite a few mics compared to some other places.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we we we have quite a bit, and they're also spoiled that we're like 45 minutes away from OC, you know, 45 minutes to an hour away from LA, and we could just do mics any day of the week, anytime, and we could just go out and do it, you know.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: You can get a mic in Hollywood at 10 a.m.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: 15-minute mic.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: You can go and get 15 minutes of stage time before lunchtime, which is freaking nuts.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's absolutely nuts.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: But it is very cool.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: Uh what else I want to talk about?
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: What else did I want to talk about?
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_00: I felt like I forgot.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_00: It was something I wrote in my notes, but the problem is I'm scared to mess with the phone because it's recording, and I feel like if I mess with it, it's gonna stop.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so far it hasn't stopped.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, let's talk about Coachella.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: So, Coachella week one was last week, week two is this week.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm headed out towards the desert right now because I've been out here, staying out here, freaking working, which has been great for the money because there's so many people in town, a lot of tourists, a lot of people ordering DoorDash, and it's very, very beneficial for me and my family since that's what I do.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, I stayed up last Saturday night, so this was a week ago today.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: I stayed up last Saturday night because I wanted to watch Justin Bieber, and I watched his performance.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if you guys have heard about his performance, or maybe if you saw his performance.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want to totally ruin it, but I'm gonna ruin it for you.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: So much of it is just him sitting down like on YouTube with Wi-Fi, and he's playing bits and pieces of his favorite songs.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: And like it wasn't like he was performing the whole song.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_00: He would like you know sing along to a piece of it or whatever, and then he would turn it like it was literally blue ballsing everybody, and everyone was like, Yeah, beauty and a bee, oh yeah, this, that, and then it was like, Oh, you're actually not doing it, you're just messing around.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: So I stayed up 11:30 to like one o'clock in the morning to watch Justin Bieber frick around on YouTube premium.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I I was like, I'm so glad I didn't pay for a ticket to go see JB, because I would be so pissed if that's what I paid for.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I know some people are like, oh, you know, it's him healing, and this is like a therapeutic experience for him to do this.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, that's something you do at home, and and you freaking record it and you put it out on YouTube for people to see, like you looking at all of your history on YouTube, and you can make a sweet documentary about it.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: But like, people paid so many thousands of dollars to come out and see a performance, you know?
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_00: Get some freaking backup dancers, dog.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_00: Hit some freaking jiggies, dude.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like, there was a few songs where he brought out people and they sang together, and that part was cool, but then so much of it was just him sitting.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: Him sitting down.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: Imagine people pay to come see me at a comedy show, and I'm like, hey, you guys want to watch old clips of mine when I was funny?
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: People like, no, I want you to see I want you to see, I want to see you.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, I can't talk.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: I want to see you be funny right now.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want to see you be funny then.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: I want to see you be funny right now, and you know what?
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's totally valid.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_00: It's totally valid, a hundred percent totally valid.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I just I feel bad for those people that had spent thousands of dollars to come out and they came out specifically to see him, and then he was just sitting there freaking just looking at a computer screen.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of crazy.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: Kinda crazy, kinda crazy.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, let's talk about local politics.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_00: Local politics.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_00: Let's uh, if you're ever on these Facebook groups, first of all, I think Facebook groups are freaking toxic.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: My wife be talking about these Facebook groups, they got rules and they got these admins that are on 24 hours a day that are not bots that are real people that just drink Red Bull.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: They drink Red Bull and probably take Adderall, and they're just absolute monsters when it comes on here.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_00: Like, they're just like bad comment, delete it.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_00: This doesn't uh sit within our guidelines, delete it, banned, get out of here, see you later.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like these guys are like working 12-hour shifts, like police.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like these guys are patrolling the streets of the Facebook group looking for any and all uh criminals, any and all lawbreakers, and it might be something that's like oh, I wanted to post a flyer for a comedy show I have coming up, and I'm in the city.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm in this city, and I'm doing a comedy show in this city.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: I want to let the people of this city know there's 7,000 people in this group.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: I want to let them know that I'm doing a comedy show, and so I'll post something about it, and they'll be like, your request was denied, and I'm like, how am I supposed to get out this to every single person?
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like, if if these people are gatekeeping what you can post, they'll be like, you're only allowed to post certain discussions and no self-promotion unless you pay us.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, pay you?
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_00: You want me to pay you?
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know who I'll pay?
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'll pay a Russian hacker to get your Facebook account to shut you down and deactivate you and leak all your DMs.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: How about that?
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_00: You want me to do that?
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: You want me to pay a Russian hacker to come get you, Karen?
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_00: I'll pay a Russian hacker to come get you.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: That's what I should do.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_00: Facebook groups can be so weird though.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: People in there! Oh my gosh! Stop freaking yawning.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: People in there, they be acting like God.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_00: And I know they're so happy, like when they're banning somebody, they're just like it's like it's like they feel like they're a judge hitting the gavel on the stand, you know what I'm saying?
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like it's they feel so I get I know they feel so good when they be like punishing somebody.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, you're banned for a week, you didn't use the correct pronouns.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like, shut up.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's freaking Facebook, relax.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody should be able to be allowed to say whatever they want on Facebook and online.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's my opinion.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_00: But the thing is, is there your online opinion still lives in real life?
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta keep the same energy, right?
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_00: If you're talking mess and you're going crazy on the internet, you know what you need to be doing when somebody pulls up to your face in person, keep the same energy.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_00: Keep the same energy.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you think you're you think you're all that behind a Facebook?
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, guess what?
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_00: If I see you walking around town and I ask you about it, I don't want you to be like, oh my bad dog, freaking no.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: Keep the same energy.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna talk smack, keep the same energy, don't change it because we're standing face to face and you get nervous.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not saying like a fighting situation, because I don't I don't fight.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: That's not what I'm saying.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm saying like a like people people talk.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: Uh they give all their opinions, which is like I said, I'm fine with people giving their opinions, but they need to also be able to take responses.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_00: You need to be able to take responses for anything, right?
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: If I post a joke and people don't like it and they respond to it because maybe they were offended or because maybe you know something, whatever the reason may be.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: I need to be able to take the the the criticism or the scrutiny that somebody else tries to give me the same way that they need to be able to take my thoughts on what they're saying.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's all there is to it.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_00: There you go.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_00: I just fixed Facebook groups.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_00: If everybody follows that, we're totally fine.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_00: We really did a lot today, folks.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_00: This was a fun episode.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_00: We really did a lot, we figured out a lot.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I hope you guys enjoyed the ride.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm enjoying the ride.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_00: I'm almost out here to my destination in Coachella.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_00: Please follow at Carmody Podcast, at I.e.comedy, at Dave Thompson Comedy, on Instagram, on all the platforms on Facebook.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to come, we'll we'll go terrorize a Facebook group together.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um, thank you so much for listening to the Carmody Podcast.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_00: I see you guys um up to 20 faithful listeners, and that's amazing.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you guys so much for listening to the podcast.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_00: I know sometimes it's just a rant and I'm yawning, and it's like, oh, I can edit that out, or oh, whatever.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_00: But like, honestly, you guys, I like to keep it like this because this is just real.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_00: I know there's a little bit of noise in the background.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: I got my air on a little bit, I'm on the freeway, you know, I'm headed out here towards the desert, but I'm really glad that this episode actually recorded all the way through, and I'm really glad that you guys are here with me for the ride.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_00: Stay safe out there, be safe, be well.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_00: I love you guys.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_00: You guys are amazing.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: Freaking above kisses, by the way, best thing to have in your car other than wet wipes is flossers.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_00: Goodbye.