Latest / Becoming Flame: Where Sensuality, Sovereignty, and Sacred Power Ignite / How Ritual, Touch and Botanical Wisdom Deepen Self-Intimacy
Transcript
- Kait Tregenza: Hello, beautiful people. It's Kate and you are tuning into another episode of Becoming Flame podcast. All right, so today what I want to talk about is why you do not need another perfume. Why you do not need another bottle to make you smell expensive, whatever that means. You just don't need another fragrance to make you feel desirable because actually feeling desirable is not a byproduct of a beauty product. that teaches you to think about how you are being received by other people before it ever asks you how you are receiving yourself. So I think what we all need is a way back into our bodies. What we all need is a way to feel softer, safer, more open, more turned on, more alive, more present in our own skin. We do not need more performance, more pretending, more masks, more of that. It's about more contact. and that is the entire reason that Fennec exists because I believe that the modern fragrance industry has trained women into this very subtle kind of estrangement from themselves. Not just from ingredient truth and opaqueness and you know hiding behind fragrance and not just from the intelligence and plants but even from their own bodies. Because most perfume is sold to women as projection. how you smell to others, how you land in a room for others, what mood you signal to others, how expensive do you feel, how desirable do you seem, all of this is external. You know, it's like how memorable are you to somebody else? But what I really want you to hear is what is underneath that. It means that fragrance has been built around other people's receivership of you. not your own receivership of yourself. That is enormous. That is enormous because once you start to see it, once you start to feel that you cannot unsee it, you cannot unfeel it. Women are taught to dress for reception, speak for reception, behave for reception and send themselves for reception. But where in that whole system, in that whole ideology is she? Where is the woman's own experience of herself? Where is the return to her? How does she see her body as home if it's designed to be on display in receivership for everybody else? Where is the use of beauty? Where is the use of scent, touch, plant, ritual, sensuality if all it is is about her becoming whatever somebody else needs of her and everybody's needs are going to be different. So where is the single line? Where is the thread of her? Where is her beauty for her? Where is her scent for her? Her touch for her? And I don't see this pathway into deeper self-intimacy. I see a pathway into greater performance for the outside world. That is what I care about. That is what Fennex is built on. Not the hypothesis that fragrance should make you more impressive, should make you seem expensive, should outlast every other fragrance. The hypothesis that fragrance, when created and used differently, can help you come back into your full relationship with yourself. so that it can help your body soften, that it can help your nervous system open, calm, relax, and it can then help you build intimacy with your own skin, your own breath, your own sensuality, your own pace, your own life force, that it can become finally something beyond decoration. It can be the threshold technology it used to be. And that is what I've okayed. It's not perfume in that ordinary sense of adornment. It's not just here to make you smell beautiful. It's here to help you create a state, a state of deeper contact, a state of essential embodiment, a state of softness without collapse, without being subservient, without being dominated over softness for softness sake. Softness because that's the receptivity point. Softness because you are safe, you can relax, you are intimately connected to self. And it's a state of erotic aliveness that is not performance, not theater, not costume, not this image, not this obligation, right? It's a state. where you ⁓ feel yourself because most are not liking beauty. They're lacking ⁓ access. Access their own body, access to stillness, to real safety, access to pleasure that is not being produced for somebody else. ⁓ Even to beauty that does not immediately get rerouted ⁓ into somebody else's consumption or self judgment or comparison or consumption or, you know, sale ability. And I think that this is one of the reasons so many women feel exhausted because almost everything about them, their body, everything in the beauty world is still built around the gaze. Being more attractive, look younger, smell better, optimize the surface. Yeah, improve the package. But the body is not packaged. The body is alive. Our skin is alive. The system is alive. We are alive. The psyche is alive. And what you put ⁓ your skin is entering a relationship with a living ⁓ You are a living field. You are a technology system and that should change everything. Because if the body is alive, then fragrance just cannot be neutral. It is either deepening relationship or it is deepening disconnection. It's either drawing a woman inward or pushing her further out into performance. And most conventional has been built around the second category. It is about performance. It is about adornment. It is about surface. It is about scent. And that is it. And it has designed to project, to impress, to diffuse, to perform, to announce, And so what we're doing is we're asking a completely different question, not how do you want to smell to others? How do you want to feel inside of yourself? And that is not technically a question that perfumers have ever really been asked. They concern themselves with base, heart, and top. We concern ourselves with how do you want to feel when you wake up and meet yourself? How do you want to before intimacy, in intimacy? How does intimacy feel in your body? How do you want to feel when you've been cut off from your body for days, weeks, months, years, decades? How do you want to feel when you need to remember your softness, your sensuality, your magnetism, your truth, your coherence, your signature, your field? Because once you ask that question or these questions, everything must change. The formula changes, the medium changes, the purpose of this product changes. And that's why The oil itself matters so much because the spray fragrance enters the room first. An oil enters the body first. A spray disperses, but an oil gathers. It goes internal. You know, the spray, it's creating atmosphere around you, but the oil requires contact. It requires stillness. It requires touch. It requires tactility. So that spray can be so unconscious. You don't need to participate, but an oil asks for participation. You need to apply it with your hand. You need to choose where it goes. You need to touch yourself. You need to slow down. You need to naturally put your hands to your throat or to your body or to your nose. You choose where it goes, how it goes, and you choose you be in that moment. You choose a moment of stillness. It requires a pace shift. Yeah. It requires your presence to be involved and that means the oil itself is not just a format. It's actually a philosophy because that moment you need to stop to put it on to warm it up. The moment that fragrant moves through touch, it stops being an aesthetic effect and it starts becoming self-contact. And self-contact is where intimacy with yourself begins. It's got nothing to do with another person. It's all about self. And that is one of the deepest things I wanted women to experience, to have as part of their daily practice. Intimacy is not firstly romantic. It's not firstly sexual, it's not firstly relational, you know, in the way that we've been taught or made to believe. Intimacy begins as your ability to stay with yourself, to stay with your own sensation, to soften without ⁓ bracing, leaving, you know, to just receive, to remain present in your own body and let that beauty in, let that pleasure in, let that truth in. if a woman does not feel safe in her own body then what she so often calls intimacy is actually performance or it's tension or it's compliance or it's self-monitoring or it's something that she's doing not being. So safety has to come first. Before sensuality becomes alive it must become relational. before fragrance becomes seductive, it can become devotion and you can become this devotional You can create a self devotional practice of self safety, of self intimacy, of self love in a way that is not just ⁓ something through mirror work or through self care. You're actually being aided by not only the scent but the botanical intelligence itself. And that's where evoke works, right? Like when a woman opens to herself, then she can open to another and not the other way around. And so evoke works not by forcing, not by performing, not by promising some kind of synthetic fantasy of desirability, but by helping the body Remember, remember softness, reverence, sensuality, beauty as a portal, not as a demand, not as a promise, not as a deliverable, but remember that the body is not an object to decorate, but an intelligent field to inhabit. And she is this intelligent field she must inhabit. If she's going to ever know her true beauty, Her true capacity, her creativity, her sensuality, her life force, erotic nature, all comes from an ability to inhabit the body, to be connected in self, in the body, in truth. And Beauty Madness here, more than most people know how to talk about because beauty is, it's not superficial, right? And it's not about what you put on your face. It's not about how you do your hair, your makeup, whatever. is one of the fastest ways to soften defense because beauty interrupts numbness. It reorganizes your attention and it makes more truth. It makes truth receivable because beauty opens the senses and it gives the body a reason to stay with it. The problem was never beauty. The problem was the beauty industry that hijacked beauty. It got hijacked by spreadsheets, by optimization, by comparison, by very, very bad marketing about telling you that you need to be something else than you're not, that you are inherently wrong and that this group that you put on your face can change that for you. So we're starting in a lack, we're starting in a wrongness, we're starting in a problem. and that this company now sells it for you. What we're trying to do is restore beauty as the portal it actually is. Beauty as reverence, beauty as contact, beauty as self-return. I'm going to say it again. It's beauty as self-return, as remembrance. That is why this is not just fragrance. This is not even just natural perfume. It's not even just clean beauty. It is alchemical coherent beauty. Meaning it is designed not only to smell beautiful, which it does, but to organize a deeper state in the woman wearing it to help herself and to help her feel, to help her drop in and to re-enter herself. And yes, I can go into the history of this because women have been using aromatic oils in temple, in ritual, in healing, in threshold work, in temple work, in process work for thousands of years. This is not random what I'm talking about. This is not branding. This is not theater. This is a real lineage here. But I wanted to first start with the understanding if you took nothing else from this episode understand this you do not need anything to be the version of yourself that you feel is true. However when we are so combated by so many forces all the time EMFs are interrupting our field. Work gets busy. Life gets stressful. Traffic. War. all of the things that we have in our lives every single day. It can be really hard to by ourselves hold a coherent field. And more importantly than anything else, we as modern women haven't grown up in temples. We haven't grown up in sister circles. We haven't grown up. Most of the women who are doing temple process work today are remembering it. They have never been initiated in their physical bodies, in their physical lifetime. And that's not a bad thing because in many ways the scent can take us to the times where we were initiated and we were available for this. And that is why we've created scent as limbic system gateway portal access into this memory, into these ropes. And we have done the research about what are the scents that open us. What are the botanical spajerics that open us into these memories, into this restoration of truth, into this restoration of memory? and putting that to one side and now coming back into you can do this by yourself. However, how much more can you hold by yourself every day? And at what point can you actually finally collapse into a structure, collapse into a container, collapse into a teacher, a guide and a companion? that has the technological activations, the codes, the opportunities to actually hold you in that and activate further where there's no further contamination because the problem with human guides to doing this is they are contaminated. The value of botanical guides is that they are not and that they have the highest frequency available on this earth right now. And they have the technology of time travel, of time collapse, of shifting, of moving your field and your consciousness up and down over and over or wherever it needs to go. And plants know this. They have this capacity to thin the veil, to move beyond, to move in between and to activate within the body. things that we don't necessarily know how to activate ourselves. And so their role is very different to human technology, which is why you see the resurgence of plant medicine in such a huge way. And people can collapse years and years and years of therapy, years of trauma through the medicine journeys. And while it is very effective to sometimes do some extreme work, with certain plants. Other times it's a more appropriate form to do gentle daily opening, softening into a resonant field of safety that your body can open, open, open bit by bit, bit by bit every single day. And when it comes to the feminine embodiment work, ⁓ personally found that ⁓ subtle opening allows the body to go at a level it is available and ready for that it is actually able to hold. And so your capacity is increasing bit by bit, day by day. The center's allowing you to reinforce those neural pathways being formed as the codes get activated. And so basically we will start to come to understand that, okay, yeah, I don't need another perfume to perform this better version of myself. What I need is this self ritual, these materials, these technologies that actually help me become more fully inhabited in my real self, in my truth, in my coherence. And as I get to know that and as I take time, five minutes is all it needs every morning. You know, taking this Fajirik, putting, applying the oil, taking your meditation, taking your ritual, whatever it may be that's right for you. And you're opening bit by bit, day by day. Now you're doing this not for the purpose to make you smell good in the room, which you will do. Don't worry about that. But it's to help your body remember how to open. And that's the fundamental shift that we need to get into right now.