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Resisting Hate Without Losing Ourselves · Infinitely Precious

• 0:00
  Intro: Welcome to the infinitely precious podcast produced by infinitely precious LLC. Your host is James Henry. Remember, you are infinitely precious and unconditionally loved for the gift you already are.
• 0:12
  James: Hello beloved. It's me James and I'm here with you today on my Friday only podcast and the Friday only podcast is a podcast doesn't go out in any other form. Sometimes I choose to share it in video form but most of the time it just goes out as a podcast Friday afternoon at three I suspect I will be sharing this one in other venues because I feel like the topic is an important one. We live in a time right now that is filled with a great deal of hate and frustration and I know a lot of people who are seeking to stand up against the hate and injustice they say being perpetrated. I'm one of them.
• 1:04
  And trying to speak truth to power, speaking truth into a world that seems occasionally to have forgotten what truth is, what fact is, and begins to conflate a lot of statements with the truth. So I've been talking to people who feel frustrated by this, who feel anger, who start to feel burned out and exhausted by the process. It's easy to get to that place. I'm just being honest. It's easy for me sometimes to get close to that place.
• 1:49
  When I'm talking about injustices, want to be clear, I think marginalizing people because of their ethnic origin like black, Latinx, indigenous people is wrong. I believe that demonization of people because they are a part of the LGBTQIA plus community is wrong and marginalizing people, taking away their rights, stealing their stories from the public forum is not all right. And it feels and is unjust. And there's a lot of hateful rhetoric about it wrapped up in it. Now, I want to say it's important because if you're one of those folks who are advocating for one or all of these kinds of concerns about the poor, the marginalized, the demonized in our society, it takes endurance.
• 3:10
  It takes endurance. A lot of things are coming quickly, and it is easy to imagine drinking from a fire hose and be overwhelmed too much, too fast. And so activism, standing up for what we believe and justice requires endurance. And endurance requires a kind of inner strength. And that inner strength, I want to tell you right now I believe if you're listening to this podcast and even for people who aren't, you have inner strength.
• 3:45
  You just may not have found a way to connect with it. So how do we resist the hate without letting it consume us? How do we stay engaged without burning out? These are the questions that drive my reflection for today. First of all, I know how heavy anger and frustration feel and I know that even carrying it for other people as sometimes I find myself doing can be exhausting.
• 4:24
  It can tire us out. So that leads us to want to fight fire with fire, to meet hatred in with an equal kind of stance, with equal force. And so meet hate with hate. You know, Martin Luther King Junior, Doctor. Martin Luther King Junior shared a thought and you know he may have because he studied with Gandhi I know that he was familiar with the dhammapada And the dhammapada, I wanted to read you a quick quote from the dhammapada in the beginning, For hatred can never put an end to hatred.
• 5:14
  Love alone can. This is an unalterable law. Hate can never put an end to hatred. So if you're advocating for love, if you're advocating for inclusion, if you're advocating for not marginalizing people, doing so from the same place, the same hatred, the same denigration as others are will never drive that injustice out. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.
• 5:58
  It's it's going to be hard work and it's going to require a long term vision. So how can we engage without being reactive? If we're not careful, the very anger we feel which motivated us in the beginning begins to shape us into a person we don't want to become. So we have to be grounded in our approach. I learned this quite frankly, I've reflected on it a long time, but when I studied with Father Richard Rohr at the Center for Action and Contemplation, he starts with action that leads to contemplation and contemplation is that stepping back and finding that quiet space within that allows us to really engage the injustices of this world, the evil that we see happening without becoming evil ourselves.
• 7:00
  So there is a great wisdom in the contemplative tradition that I want to invite you to embrace with me. If only for the time allotted in this podcast. When we are still for a few moments every day, maybe even more than a few moments every day, that stillness can allow us to clear out the space within, to let go of the things that are making us angry so that instead of working from that place of anger, we see what's making us angry, see what the issues are, let them go and choose to engage from a place of love. It's chaos. The world right now feels a little chaotic and in the midst of that, it's the image I see is being in the midst of a heavy windstorm and a tree with deep roots that help to keep it centered, grounded where it is.
• 8:19
  It bends with the wind. It learns how far it can bend but doesn't blow over when its roots are deep. And I think to some extent that's what we need when we are pushing against forces that are injust, that do dehumanize and steal the personhood of others seek to steal it anyway. We need to have those kinds of roots that bring us back. If you're a person of faith, that might be a life of quiet prayer.
• 9:02
  It might look like something else to someone who is not a person of faith. It might look like a quiet meditation, perhaps a mantra that we speak to ourselves. Only love. Only love. You know, it could be something along those lines when we feel the anger rising up in us.
• 9:33
  I want to repeat something I said a little earlier and that is contemplation does not mean inaction. It means acting from a place of greater wholeness and not from a place of reactivity. When I read social media, I want to react. I often want to react and I do occasionally lose track and react. And when I do that, what ends up happening is I sometimes say things I probably am not proud of saying.
• 10:12
  And as I teach in a relationship class that I teach, you can't un say the things what you have said. You could ask for forgiveness but what's said is said. So we choose carefully and wisely how we will respond and what we will say to the injustices we see, to the challenges that exist. So what does practice look like, James? You've talked about practice.
• 10:45
  What does it look like? It can be as simple as when somebody says something that infuriates you, that pushes you, taking a breath before you say anything. Taking a breath before you say anything. It works in personal conversations as well. Take a breath before you say anything.
• 11:08
  When you feel the bile rising in you, take a breath, slow down, let that emerge when it's ready, but in a more measured tone, not in a hateful one because again hate doesn't turn away hate, only love can do that. Hold the bothand, realize that pain and hope are often born together, grief and resistance can coexist. You feel the pain and you can respond, resist, act on behalf of those who cannot or are not able for one reason or another to act for themselves. Set boundaries. Decide when you're going to disengage from a toxic conversation or toxic media, whether it be the news or anything else.
• 12:09
  I am only going to take so much when I feel the tightness begin in my chest or in my shoulders or I feel my fist clenching, I'm just going to say clearly we cannot come we have come to an impasse and walk away. Turn off whatever the media is. You can set your own boundaries. This is you get to set your own boundaries at least you for the most part. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule, but for the most part you can set your own boundaries.
• 12:44
  Practice daily grounding. Take a moment, for silence, breath, and gratitude in the morning. Be thankful for what you are able to do, for the sleep you were able to get, for the breakfast perhaps that you ate, for the friends you have that don't leave you alone in this, take a moment to step back and practice a little gratitude and breath for just a minute every day. It may grow into something longer, that's what it did for me. Lean on community.
• 13:20
  Justice is a collective issue and find people who will engage with you who are similar in their willingness to ground themselves and not simply be reactive, who are willing to really engage the issues to speak from a place of love, not who are just going to stir you up and make you mad and remind you of all the injustice, but will join with you in making a difference. So having said all that, take a moment now. Catch your breath and breathe. Justice is a long work and yet love sustains us, it holds us up. What's one practice you can try this week that might help sustain you in the long run, give you endurance for this that lies ahead?
• 14:20
  Is it simply being thankful for five things in the morning or one thing if that's all you can think of? Is it taking a quiet moment first thing in the morning just to enjoy a cup of tea or a glass of water, cup of coffee, whatever it is you do slow down just a bit? Resisting injustice does not mean becoming what we resist. It means instead to remain the person that we are, to act from a place of love. Remember you are infinitely precious and unconditionally loved for the gift you already are.
• 15:03
  Remember that hate cannot drive out hate only love can do that. That's an immutable unalterable law. So love boldly set boundaries step back catch your breath. This is an endurance work not a sprint. Until the next time I wish you all the very best my friends.