Latest / RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way / Ep. 33 – Burnout

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Ep. 33 – Burnout · RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Today's episode is produced by my friends at Walk West.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: If you're looking to grow your brand and generate leads through podcast or video production, head over to walkwest.com.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, let's start the show.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Rise Up.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: Live Joy Your Way with Comedy Wood.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to step into your power.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: Hi everyone, and welcome to another episode of Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_01: I am thrilled that you decided to hop on here and listen to today's episode.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: I am Comedy Wood, and for those of you who are still getting to know me, I'm a certified life coach that works with individuals on healing that relationship with oneself in order to end the outsourcing of their own self-worth so that they can go on to have success in business and in their career, as well as truthfully find happiness and joy in their relationships and just in their everyday life, to move on from that box checking to actually being engaged in their life.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: And on that note, today's episode is actually on burnout.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_01: I think right now, with the way that the world has evolved, how 2020 has unfolded, I am hearing more and more from my clients about just how they feel a bit burned out, a bit overwhelmed.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: And so I felt that it was it was really important to just tackle this subject, tackle the concept of what is burnout, what are the signs of burnout, how what what are the causes of burnout, um, and just some ideas of how to how to deal with it.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: So first and foremost, what is burnout?
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_01: Burnout has there are two definitions of burnout.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_01: One is a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by long-term involvement in emotionally demanding situations.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: And then a second one is a state of fatigue or frustration brought about by a devotion to a cause, way of life, a relationship that failed to produce the expected reward.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_01: So, what are the causes or what are the recognized causes of burnout?
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: The first one is lack of control.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_01: So oftentimes, in order to feel confident or I'm sorry, in order to feel satisfied or competent in what we're doing, uh we need to have this sense of control or have a sense that we are in control of the tasks and as well as the outcomes.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_01: Those of us who are fixers uh know this very well.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: We like to have control of all the things.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: And so if we haven't been given an appropriate level of responsibility or we feel that we don't have access to the tools or resources to handle all the things and to get them taken care of, uh, we could we could overfunction and end up in the state of burnout.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: So how do we deal with that?
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, one way to deal with the lack of control is to um figure out if it is something that we actually need to be in control of.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_01: You know, oftentimes we go into overdrive mode and fix-it mode, and the truth of the matter is it's not even ours to fix.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: So sometimes we just have to recognize, hey, this isn't mine.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_01: It's not mine.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: I need to give it back to the person who is responsible for this.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_01: And for those times that we are responsible for something and we feel out of control and we don't have the the tools that we need in order to get whatever it is accomplished, it's about communication, communication to our support system as well as um asking those around us what they're what they might be able to suggest or just for their support and help.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Another reason why we could end up with burnout is because we feel that we're not getting noticed or rewarded.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of times, you know, people think of reward as just a monetary reward, but oftentimes in life we're just looking for people to validate us.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: And um we in when we're not receiving that validation from those external validations, we start once again to over-function and over-produce and over-provide in order to get noticed and to have somebody recognize all that we're doing.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: So, truthfully, this one is an inside-out approach.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: It's about recognizing and rewarding yourself, it's about giving yourself the accolades that you deserve.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_01: When we can let go of those external validations, we start releasing ourselves from the need to please.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so it's about taking the time each day to celebrate yourself for the wins that you've had for the day.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_01: And when I say wins, I mean just the accomplishments, the things that you've done well, the things that you've gotten off of your list.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_01: So big or small, just take the time to celebrate yourself and to give yourself that internal reward rather than only expecting it from the outside.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_01: Another reason that we end up feeling burnout is lack of community.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: So a strong sense of community is it's it's characterized by this, the low levels of conflict, it's by positive social interactions.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: And right now, for sure, with everybody having to um, when we had the stay-at-home orders, for instance, and then you know, people were quarantining, lots of people have been staying inside, there is a lack of community.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: There's a there's a lack of sense of tribe ness, if you will.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so um a lot of people thrive in that, in that sense of community, and they function best when they can share ideas and they can exchange, um, you know, exchange ideas, exchange different ways of doing things, and they have that social support, it just reaffirms, you know, your own membership in this group, this community group.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: And without that, and without that sense of community, there are times when we will start to feel the sense of burnout.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: So if you are feeling that, it's about finding ways and being creative about creating that sense of community for yourself.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_01: So again, with 2020 and the pandemic and not being able to necessarily meet up with people and have that physical sense of community, it's about how can I create that, even if it is in the virtual sense.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_01: But getting together with those like-minded individuals who can, you know, just offer that sense of support so that it decreases those feelings of isolation and loneliness.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: Another reason why burnout happens is when we are perceiving uh what we're perceiving is something that's unfair, right?
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's a perceived lack of unfairness.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry, it's a perceived lack of fairness, and we start having these feelings of being disrespected or dishonored, and we feel powerless.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: And so it's just, you know, we we in in that sense we tend to once again overfunction and try to figure out ways to to uh prove our worthiness, for instance, and prove that um we we are showing up in such a way that we want it to be more fair and we want people to recognize that it should be equitable, and so we it goes back to this concept of overfunctioning and overdoing.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_01: And so what do we do about this?
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_01: Well, if we feel like there's some inequity, it's a lot of times it's about communication.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: When you feel that there's an inequity in any situation that you're in, it's about communicating with the people who are involved in that situation and figuring out a way to create more of a sense of fairness.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: The other thing, honestly, is to take a step back and to observe just for a minute because sometimes when we are feeling as though there is a lack of fairness, it's about our perception of what's happening.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: And so sometimes we just have to ask ourselves those powerful questions of is this actually true, or is this more of a way that my own story has created it?
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_01: And how can I, how can I now shift myself into a more empowered state and see it from a different place?
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_01: So it's about really engaging in that concept of flexible thinking.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: And then the final uh well, there's two more.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_01: One is a conflict in values, and then the third is just overload.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: So uh burnout can happen when there is a conflict in values.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: This happens a lot of times in relationships when we feel that our core values are in conflict with those people around us.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not just talking about romantic relationships, again, relationships across the board, familial, uh, friendship, social slash, and then friendship slash social as well as workplace.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: When those relationships, when we have a conflict in values, we can uh go down the path of doing more, um, trying to prove somehow that our values are maybe quote unquote the right ones, it causes us to overfunction and we try to continue to contribute in a way that is seen as positive and worthwhile.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: And so a way that we can deal with these conflicting values is to bring it into in into the forefront.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: Have a communic have communication around what different values might not be in line with each other and then figuring out which ones are a requirement.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: And if it's a requirement that they're in line with each other, dealing with that situation, if it's not a requirement, being coming to a place of uh honoring each other and respecting each other for the different values you have, but finding a way to stay, um, to be able to converse, work with, live with, whatever it may be, but being able to move forward with both values being respected.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: And like I said, the last one is overload.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: When we just take on so much, we're we're overdoing it.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: I was actually just talking to somebody this morning and um just with the pandemic, uh, she was telling me about how she's just basically been overfunctioning this whole time and just taking on more and more and more, and now it's just she just feels tired and and and just sort of exhausted by the whole thing.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: And it's because with that overfunctioning, we tend to not stop and pay attention to our own feelings and needs and put them in a box and to be dealt with at some later time.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_01: Well, eventually that later time uh comes because those feelings and needs absolutely have to be dealt with, and until they are, um you end up just you burn yourself out and you feel awful.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_01: What are the symptoms of burnout?
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_01: Well, they can include having a negative and critical attitude most of the time, dreading, you know, for instance, going to work on a daily basis, or you know, you get there and suddenly you just want to leave, uh, having low energy, little interest in things, having trouble sleeping, being absent from work or school, having feelings of emptiness, experiencing physical complaints such as headaches, backaches, neck aches, just illness in general, getting irritated very easily, having thoughts that what you do doesn't even make a difference, so why do it anyway?
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, pulling away emotionally from uh your colleagues or your family members, feeling that whatever contribution you do is it it also goes unrecognized.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: So not only is it not good enough, but it also goes unrecognized.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: Uh sometimes burnout is shown up shows up with uh uh blaming of others.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_01: When something doesn't go well, it's just sort of turning to somebody else and saying you're to blame for this.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: And then um the final one of a symptom of burnout is just like constantly thinking of quitting or just changing roles.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's like that thought process of I just need to get out of here.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh that usually is an indication that um burnout is is on the horizon.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: So how do we avoid this?
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_01: Well, there's different ways, but you know, it's really about how we show up working with a purpose or showing up with a purpose on a daily basis, having a plan for your day.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't mean that we have a plan and we have to stick to it and only do that plan and and not give ourselves the space and grace to have change it if we need to, but it's about having a plan for your day, a purpose for your day, so that you have um a game plan, you have a blueprint of how and what you want to accomplish on that day.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's about delegating when you need to.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: So I know in in families like mine, for instance, I have a tendency to overfunction at times, and I have to really be cognizant and aware about delegating certain tasks to other people.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: So this could happen in the workplace and it can happen at home.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: It's about how can I how can I share some of the responsibility so it's not all on my plate.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, another really important tip, again, is to celebrate yourself and to celebrate others, to really recognize those things that are going well and to honor them and to uh really to bring them to the forefront, bring them to the consciousness, because positivity breeds positivity and it helps us have that intrinsic motivation to keep going.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: The other one, uh, another one is to take control and to manage your time, and this includes setting boundaries.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: So when we are in conversation with other people, it is okay to say no, I'm sorry, I don't have the time to do X, Y, or Z.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: It is being in charge of your time and making sure that you are not putting more on your plate than you can that that you have the ability to manage or handle on that specific day.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: Uh another really important tip to avoid burnout is to add exercise to your daily practice or at least a few times a week, maybe add a meditation practice or a mindfulness practice.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_01: What mindfulness and meditation will allow you to do is to get into the present moment.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_01: So often we're thinking about things that happened in the past and trying to fix them, or we're jumping into the future and trying to solve problems that haven't happened yet.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_01: And so when we can add this practice of just getting into the here and now, accepting what is for what is, figuring out what our next best step forward is, we're able to deal with um, we're able to deal with the adverse situations that we're facing, and we also do avoid burnout because we're not overfunctioning, trying to solve problems that don't exist yet.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_01: Which leads to the final one, which is the concept of self-compassion.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, that's that's the basis of all of this.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: This is this is the difference between self-judgment and self-kindness.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_01: It's about recognizing that you're this spiritual being having a human experience, you're doing the best you can with the information you have at any given moment.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it's about recognizing what did I learn from this situation that may not have gone the way that I originally wanted it to go, but now what can what can I take with me to move forward the next time or as I'm as I continue going down whatever path I'm on?
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_01: And it's about recognizing that you're not alone, you don't have to isolate yourself, you're part of this common humanity.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_01: Other people have had similar situations, and it's okay to seek out support from those people.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: So hopefully, this uh overview of burnout and just how to recognize it, and then some tips and strategies that you might be able to employ to reduce the burnout that you might be either feeling or on the pathway to feeling and enduring is helpful.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_01: If you do need support and would like to have um, would like to schedule time just to talk about what's coming up for you, I would be more than happy to get on a call with you and to support you.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_01: All you need to do to book a time for that is to head over to chatwithcomedy.com, book a time there.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_01: And if you'd like more information on topics like this, feel free to check out my blog on my website at comedywood.com.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_01: Until next time, I'm Comedy Wood.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening to Rise Up.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_00: Always remember your uniqueness and the gift that you bring to this world.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: Life happens for you, not to you.