Latest / Privycast / Ep. 220 Panchagavya

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Ep. 220 Panchagavya · Privycast

• 0:00
  You are in good company with me, but you are wrong, and you will be highly disappointed unless you that is you hate guava punch.
• 0:10
  Then maybe you might be on board.
• 0:12
  I'm sure guava punch is a delight.
• 0:15
  I can't imagine guava punch being bad.
• 0:18
  Punch a guavia?
• 0:19
  Punch a guavia?
• 0:20
  Guava punch.
• 0:26
  Welcome back to Privy.
• 0:28
  Privy is a podcast about bathrooms recorded from my home bathroom.
• 0:36
  I'm your host, Hunter Hoover, and I love bathrooms.
• 0:40
  Welcome back, everyone.
• 0:41
  Thank you all for being here.
• 0:44
  I had to tell you, it's cold.
• 0:47
  It's getting cold.
• 0:48
  The point of this episode's record everybody's stuffed, just stuffed slam full of festive Halloween candy.
• 0:56
  They've got all Hallows Ean, they've hallowed their Ean, and they're just plum, just just plum full of candy.
• 1:04
  At the point of this episode's writing, which was the end of October, and at the point of this episode's recording, which is here in the in the throes of the beginning of November.
• 1:15
  And dare I say, at the point of this episode's release, because that is but just a handful of days away, there are still
• 1:26
  If you can believe it, I I'm actually recording this on election day.
• 1:31
  There is as if as if the Cintis Corporation was trying to give a big old middle fingy to the notion of of democratic elections themselves.
• 1:43
  There are no finalists yet.
• 1:46
  This is this is America's best restroom finalist watch.
• 1:50
  Like there's gonna be red alerts.
• 1:54
  out there when when these finalists post, but they don't exist yet.
• 1:57
  I mean they exist, but the Sintus Corporation has not figured out how to like push, publish, or like go enter on whatever this website is that's sitting there.
• 2:07
  I guarantee you they're there.
• 2:11
  These bathrooms exist.
• 2:12
  America's got amazing bathrooms.
• 2:14
  We've seen years and years of them.
• 2:17
  At the point of this episode, we are less than two months away from it being 2027.
• 2:25
  We are closer now to 2027 than we have ever been in waiting for one of these America's Best Restroom Finalist release ever before.
• 2:38
  And
• 2:39
  And I'm starting to wonder, and this has got me thinking, I'm starting to wonder if if the Sintis Corporation and the America's Best Restroom competition itself doesn't have enough
• 2:51
  submissions this year.
• 2:52
  And so I'm making a commitment to you here.
• 2:56
  If America's best restroom does not have their finalists posted and voting up by November fifteenth, that will
• 3:08
  That will leave but forty-six calendar days before the end of the year.
• 3:14
  That'll mean that we are closer to Thanksgiving.
• 3:17
  We're almost infringing on privy Christmas if the voting comes out then.
• 3:23
  I've got some fun things in store for the month of November and December.
• 3:28
  And I'm gonna be honest, the Sintus Corporation is kind of pissing me off by holding out so long by posting the finalists.
• 3:35
  Now, do they listen to this?
• 3:37
  Probably not.
• 3:38
  Should they listen to it?
• 3:41
  Probably.
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  They're a bathroom company, sort of.
• 3:45
  They they do a lot of things associated with a bathroom.
• 3:47
  It seems irresponsible for them to not know about a bathroom podcast.
• 3:54
  So if we do not have submissions revealed, finalists revealed, by November fifteenth, we here on Privy, myself, will begin posting some of our bathrooms from Toilet Tuesdays as
• 4:08
  possible contestants.
• 4:09
  We're going to enter the ring as a way of getting the Sintis Corporation, America's Best Restroom, to spur themselves forward.
• 4:18
  The point of record, they have twelve days to post those finalists for voting.
• 4:25
  And on November sixteenth, if there is no finalists revealed on the night of the fifteenth, you better believe the submissions are gonna start rolling in.
• 4:37
  And I've got
• 4:38
  Plenty of them on backlog Syntyscorp.
• 4:41
  We gotta get things moving.
• 4:42
  It it's actually ridiculous that we don't have this yet.
• 4:45
  Um, I know that everybody's like waiting with bated breath for for these finalists to be revealed.
• 4:51
  I I know I am.
• 4:52
  I know that everybody is also losing sleep.
• 4:55
  It's it's a it's a challenge for sure.
• 4:58
  But we've survived Spoop Ge season.
• 5:02
  And we are well on our way to what people colloquially colo quil colloquially call the holidays.
• 5:12
  It's the holiday season, holiday season and Santa Claus has got a drop a turd.
• 5:20
  Everybody knows that he's singin' a song and he's droppin' down the chimney turds and he's droppin' down as chimney turds.
• 5:30
  It's the holiday season and mister Hanky's reason for comin' a town is spreading some cheer and heidi ho everybody reindeer de pee and psychedelic pee.
• 5:44
  Last year, around this time, we took a look at the Hindu Cow Poop Flinging Festival, an honestly glorified like dookie wrestling match called Gorehaba.
• 6:00
  Specifically, we looked at all the festivities and culture around it and leading up to what became and what has become Gorhaba.
• 6:09
  In it, the topic of Diwali popped up.
• 6:12
  Now, I'm not Hindu, I don't know if you could tell by the fact that I just sang a very, very Western and very Christmas themed holiday season song.
• 6:21
  But I don't celebrate Diwali, it's fine, but that does not change the fact that Diwali is celebrated in the month of November.
• 6:30
  And it actually begins on the day of this episode's release, November fifth.
• 6:35
  Consequently, if America's Best Restroom doesn't get their act together, you'll know because this episode will have come out on November fifth.
• 6:44
  Now, if they pull a fast one and somehow release on November fourth the finalists, I'm not I I'm telling you, I don't think that I have the bathroom magic to make a November fifth
• 6:56
  America's Best Restroom finalist episode happen.
• 7:00
  But we'll do our darndest to get that bad boy in there.
• 7:04
  For those who don't know, Diwali is a Hindu festival of lights that is celebrated in the fall on the longest new moon or something.
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  I don't really know.
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  The the whole lunar calendar thing, it's a mess.
• 7:17
  And I gotta be honest, holidays that move or are based on like what the sun and moon are flipping doing in any given moment of the like retrograde of the stuff, it's it's weird
• 7:28
  and bad, in my opinion.
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  I don't like it.
• 7:31
  I I don't like holidays that move.
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  I like holidays that have a date and they happen on that date.
• 7:37
  This is one of my grievances with Thanksgiving, is Thanksgiving's like, it's the fourth Thursday after the just stop.
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  It's always on a Thursday, which is nice, but I like to have like, it's on November twenty sixth.
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  Or whatever.
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  That's not how Thanksgiving works.
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  Thanksgiving's one of those weird moving holidays.
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  It's the same day of the week, but like the date is different.
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  It's frustrating in a specific way.
• 8:04
  I don't really have any justification to talk about Diwali, but as it's that time of year, it seems as good a time as any to drag out an old topic, one that we discovered during our
• 8:15
  research for Gorehaba.
• 8:19
  As we noted when we looked at Gorehaba, the cow has a significant role in the belief and life of those who are Hindu practicing people.
• 8:30
  Many Hindus worship the bow vine.
• 8:33
  based on a belief of their history of the deities that is tied to their view of reincarnation.
• 8:39
  It goes as far as a belief that there is actually medicinal properties related to the cow.
• 8:47
  When we were on our Gorhaba journey, which began as they believed there was some medicinal value in rolling around in sun heated cow crap, the claim again is that they have super
• 8:59
  healthy skin and never have any skin trouble.
• 9:01
  We we
• 9:02
  We talked about the video where the guy's like our skin is perfect.
• 9:05
  Like we don't ever have any blemishes.
• 9:07
  It's like, brother, I get blemishes just from like being sweaty.
• 9:12
  You're telling me that the cow dookie just crust it into your cracks and crevices then give you a blemish.
• 9:17
  I'm not buying it, but whatever.
• 9:21
  I should say this time of year, but again, things are starting to get cooler.
• 9:25
  Here in Oregon, this is this weird moment where everything gets colder.
• 9:29
  But it hasn't really started to commit to like dumping ice cold, frigid, frustrating, awful rain for months on end.
• 9:39
  When that happens, the skin gets weirdly dry.
• 9:43
  And you have to break out the lotion lotion and the vaseline.
• 9:47
  Really you gotta really vass it up, you know?
• 9:49
  Um, I noticed that I'll vass up the cracks behind my ears.
• 9:54
  sometimes I'll get some vass between the toes, they'll vaseline it.
• 9:57
  Um
• 9:58
  And y and so you know, I I I will say, there used to be a day where where I would I would vass the crevasse.
• 10:05
  You know what I'm saying?
• 10:07
  But but ever since I've I've purchased a surplus of downstairs uh lotion and deodorant, you go listen to that episode.
• 10:17
  I've been pretty good in that area.
• 10:18
  I don't really need to vast it anymore.
• 10:20
  I've got lots of like various various lotions and creams that are doing a great job to keep things nice and hydrated and
• 10:27
  Yeah, keeping it fresh in in all the areas that you could want to be.
• 10:33
  But if you hear all this like talk about, you know, staying staying moist and and the benefits of cow poop, maybe you you start to think 'cause like, should I just start
• 10:44
  rubbing myself down with some cow dookie?
• 10:46
  Doesn't seem like it.
• 10:47
  Probably won't, but it is a thought that some people probably have had at some point in history.
• 10:55
  But during the research that we did for Gorhaba, we stumbled across a topic.
• 11:00
  And the concern became when in the world would we be able to introduce this topic naturally?
• 11:08
  Like what would it even look like to bring this up?
• 11:13
  And so we are unashamedly using the season of Diwali as a reason to go back to the culture of the Hindu people to take a look at another aspect related to cow poop, that is the
• 11:28
  Panchagavya.
• 11:30
  In the Vedic period, which if you aren't aware and aren't up to speed with Hindu history, and don't really keep track with ancient Indian timelines.
• 11:41
  It's a period of Indian culture and religion that spans from 1500 BC to 500 BC.
• 11:47
  Now, that was a jest.
• 11:50
  I also don't keep track of this stuff.
• 11:53
  If you gave me a timeline from like 8,000, 6000 BC to current day and said, I want you to within I want you to within 100 years guess when the Vedic period was for the Hindu
• 12:10
  people.
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  Wouldn't get it.
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  Would have never got it.
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  Just just wouldn't have got it.
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  In this time, the Vedas, a key Hindu and Indian text, arrives to their people.
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  The term is used both to describe the period as well as the texts that come out of the period.
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  In the religion of Vedism or Vedism, they observe a polytheistic system of sacrifices as a means of worship to a bunch of deities.
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  Most of these are directly connected with some sort of natural phenomenon.
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  While the earthly system involved animal sacrifices or offering of one's produce or product, in time it became an intricate system of ritual which only highly trained
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  Brahmins could do.
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  Brahman, you know what I'm saying.
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  Brahman.
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  That's probably offensive.
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  We'll move on.
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  The pendulum slung away from this to what is more of a moral philosophy of religious practice.
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  Grounded in the view of their divine quote unquote things, which finds its home in modern day Hinduism.
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  Hinduism draws on a lot of the mythology of the Vedic period, and it's their connection to, and this is where they have their connection to and reverence of cows.
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  Cows pop up all over throughout Hindu belief and mythology.
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  Lord Krishna, according to their belief, grew up as a cow herder.
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  Lord Shiva had a divine mount named Nandi the Bull.
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  As we've already looked at the past on the show, there have they have a number of festivals and celebrations centered on cows and the various things that cows can do for
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  us.
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  They can poop, and you can roll in it.
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  That's Gorhaba.
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  One's ability to protect cows and other dependent animals.
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  Such as doggies, highlights one's care for and attention to the potential of life and the spirit that exists in all creatures.
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  It's suslike Woofy.
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  And they're thinking they are in good standing in their mythology for the mother, and that they they have a stand-in for this divine mother character as a cow.
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  Cows provide nourishment.
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  Have nutrients and they take care of their young.
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  This is why the Hindu people view the cow as like this quote mother god thing to them.
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  It's a common misunderstanding that Hindus worship cows.
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  I would say they venerate them, but I don't know if they worship them.
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  I mean, it's kind of like six one way, half dozen the other, but they hold a high regard for cows as symbols of life.
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  And the Divine Mother.
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  I think it's how Catholics will say they don't worship Mary, they just revere and venerate her and make iconography to her and pray to her.
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  Like to Hindus, cows are like, you know, it's a lot.
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  But as was the case with Gorhaba, this also means there's a stress put on the things that cows do and give to us.
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  In the ancient mythology, in lieu of offering the animal as a sacrifice,
• 15:42
  You could offer up some byproduct as a sacrifice as thanks for the animal and its provision that it that it gives.
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  In many of their ancient texts, there was a substance listed as late as the Rigveda, an ancient Vedic text, that discusses it being offered as a way to please deities.
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  The substance, and our topic for today's episode, was known as Panchagavya.
• 16:15
  If you hear that name, Ponchagavia, and you think that it's like guava punch, you are in good company with me, but you are wrong.
• 16:27
  And you will be highly disappointed unless you that is, you hate guava punch.
• 16:32
  Then maybe you might be on board.
• 16:35
  I'm sure guava punch is a delight.
• 16:37
  I can't imagine guava punch being bad.
• 16:40
  Puncha guavia?
• 16:41
  Punch a guavya?
• 16:42
  Guava punch.
• 16:45
  Other ancient Vedic texts such as the Atharvivid Atharvivida suggest that this Panchagavya has a medicinal value.
• 16:56
  But before we look at the use of Panchagavya, we need to figure out what in the flippin' heck that is.
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  Panchagavya literally translates from Sanskrit to five panch and cow gavya.
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  It is best understood as translating at to the five parts of cow.
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  Now, if you asked me, if you said Hunter, Hunter, come here.
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  Sit down, have a snack.
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  Hunter, tell me what are the five parts of cow?
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  I would sit down and go, hmm, five parts of cow.
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  Steak, beef, milk, hide, and moo are the five parts of cow.
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  Now this is
• 17:45
  Un undeniably true.
• 17:47
  Steak, beef, milk, hide, and moo are the five parts of cow, if you ask me.
• 17:52
  But in ancient Indian culture, the five parts of cow are milk, got one, nailed it.
• 17:59
  Curd, which I think is a strange leap.
• 18:05
  I don't look at a cow and think, dude's got the curd going on.
• 18:09
  Like I think the curd is a byproduct of the milk, I think.
• 18:13
  Ghee, which I did not know what that was.
• 18:15
  Ghee's just like special Hindu cow butter, which also I think is just milk in another form.
• 18:22
  So ghee is the third part of cow.
• 18:25
  So so far you have milk, churned milk, and even more churned milk.
• 18:33
  I like how part of this ancient Indian recipe is just like, yeah, part of cow is just butter.
• 18:38
  Cow is butter.
• 18:40
  Cow is part butter.
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  Butter and steak is cow.
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  That is what cow is.
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  Cow is butter and steak.
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  The last two are urine.
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  Part of cow is urine.
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  And poop.
• 18:53
  Again, part of cow.
• 18:55
  These are the five combined, like some sort of lantern corn, the green lantern, and all offer a distinct.
• 19:03
  benefit in and of itself.
• 19:04
  It's like it's like the the Thanos punchy fist of Rings of Destiny.
• 19:10
  And they've like collected all of the d rhinestones and he's got his rhinestone studded fist and he's just like ready to fist with all of the parts of cow.
• 19:21
  It's very good.
• 19:23
  Curd containing bacteria is good for guts and is good for soil.
• 19:29
  Ghee is a source of fatty acid, benefits leaves.
• 19:33
  Milk provides essential vitamins and nutrients to humans and the soil.
• 19:38
  That's all fine and good.
• 19:39
  I'm not arguing with that.
• 19:41
  I'm a big fan of milk.
• 19:43
  Love dunking my Oreos in it.
• 19:45
  I'm a big fan of butter.
• 19:50
  Yes, sir.
• 19:50
  Give me some.
• 19:51
  I ate I ate this is facts.
• 19:53
  If you don't believe me, there's ways for you via the social interwebs to message and find this out.
• 20:00
  But I ate a piece of butter off the floor today that that my wai dropped in the process of buttering up a big slab of pumpkin chocolate chip bread.
• 20:10
  And it fell on the floor.
• 20:11
  And I was like, well, by gum, I'm gonna full send it.
• 20:13
  And I just tossed that that butter right back and it was good.
• 20:16
  It was really good.
• 20:17
  It wasn't ghee, because like it wasn't special Hindu cow butter, but like it was good.
• 20:22
  And for all the people, real quick, before I continue, but for all the people that are like, oh, quit touching your face, quit itching your nose.
• 20:27
  Why is your nose so itchy?
• 20:29
  It's because I have allergies.
• 20:30
  Okay.
• 20:31
  I can't help it.
• 20:32
  Once I get talking, things start moving, and I can stop and like sh just de blow my schnazz, but I'm not there emotionally.
• 20:40
  So leave it alone.
• 20:42
  Like, just ignore it.
• 20:44
  I'm sorry.
• 20:45
  I will try not to touch my nose.
• 20:49
  The existence of the mustache does not help.
• 20:53
  It just tickles my nostrils.
• 20:57
  But calurine was believed to be a natural disinfectant and a fungicide.
• 21:04
  And it was believed to help regulate hormones.
• 21:07
  So there you go.
• 21:08
  Not sure how it would do that.
• 21:10
  Like, do you just rub it on yourself?
• 21:12
  Or like what?
• 21:15
  Cow dung, while it's usually in reference to fertilizers and the microbes in which they have to improve the soil.
• 21:23
  It's also believed that the cow dung deters insects and other pests.
• 21:27
  And now I'm gonna be honest with you, this is my exact opposite experience when I'm dealing with poop of any type.
• 21:33
  Like usually where there is poop and heat and time, there is bug.
• 21:39
  And you just you just think about it.
• 21:41
  You go into a porta potty and the porta potty is left with any access.
• 21:45
  If a fly gets in there, it's gonna have a field day on the human chaz royale.
• 21:52
  These five parts of cow would be offered in sacrifice in lieu of the cow so that way it would not be harmed.
• 22:05
  Medicinally, in Panchagavya, there's a lot of things going on.
• 22:09
  And it should be noted that Panchagavia is not always fully mixed.
• 22:14
  You could use part of the part of cow.
• 22:18
  However, in some practices, they would mix up a cow part slurry for medicinal and ritualistic use.
• 22:27
  I often think what it would be like walking in on somebody mixing up one of these.
• 22:33
  Bad Ponchagavia smoothies.
• 22:35
  You go over to your buddy's house and you knock on the door, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
• 22:39
  It's like, hey, Jeremy.
• 22:40
  Hi, Belinda.
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  What are you doing?
• 22:43
  I'm just stopping by to see Chuck.
• 22:45
  Oh, yeah, Chuck, he's out in the garage.
• 22:49
  You can go check it out.
• 22:50
  He's he's out there hanging out.
• 22:51
  And you just boom, knock that garage door open.
• 22:55
  And what's that smell?
• 22:58
  First of all, is it the milk?
• 23:00
  Probably not.
• 23:01
  The butter incurred from the milk?
• 23:04
  Probably not.
• 23:05
  Could be the pea flask, the the the flask of cow urine that you're swirling around, maybe, but probably not.
• 23:15
  It's probably the Tupperware with the mud pie in it.
• 23:19
  Like what are you doing, Chuck?
• 23:21
  Why why do you have a one fifth part of cow, the poop, in a Tupperware container?
• 23:31
  Where'd you get it?
• 23:32
  And how long has it been in the Tupperware?
• 23:35
  Well, the bulk of Panchagavia's use is topical, meaning it goes on your skin on the outside of your body, thank the Lord.
• 23:43
  It'll cure eye conditions and skin conditions, alleviating pain, deals with burns.
• 23:49
  I want to say if you get a problem with your eyes and you rub Panchagavia into your eyes, that's not topical.
• 23:58
  This is it's categorically not topical at that point.
• 24:02
  If i you are rubbing it into your burn, if that burn is bad enough, it's not topical anymore.
• 24:08
  It doesn't stop there though.
• 24:11
  When we discuss what people would do with Panchagavia, keep in mind they're rubbing essentially cow poop and pea as well as some dairy products mixed together on open wounds
• 24:21
  and burns into their hair and into their eyes.
• 24:24
  It's a bad look, Chuck.
• 24:26
  Get some help.
• 24:30
  I remember a few years ago we discussed Egyptian medical remedies.
• 24:33
  And we talked about how they would rub cat poop in their eyes.
• 24:37
  Great call.
• 24:38
  Really smart.
• 24:40
  I do think that's worse somehow.
• 24:42
  I I I for for some reason, just like a gut check on the matter, like when when I hear rubbing five parts of cow slurry or rubbing just cat feces in your eye, there's something
• 24:56
  feels better about five parts of cow slurry.
• 24:58
  And I'm gonna be honest, I think it's the milk and the butter.
• 25:00
  And this might be the truth to power that butter does kind of make everything better.
• 25:07
  Just saying.
• 25:09
  It's wild.
• 25:12
  But as has been the case in the past, people look at these things and animal byproducts and think, well, it is supposed to have some benefits on the outside of the body, but what
• 25:22
  if we put it on the inside and see if it'll help me out?
• 25:26
  Well, the amount that they would consume was minimal.
• 25:29
  There was notes in ancient writings that people would actually eat the mixture for the medical benefits it would have for them.
• 25:39
  I think you have to detach yourself from reality a little bit to to be able to do that.
• 25:44
  I think you really have to disassociate something that is that is going on with every part of your brain that must be firing, saying, Don't flip and do it.
• 25:53
  Do not put that in your mouth.
• 25:56
  And you really have to say no to that rational part of your brain and say yes, but the five parts of cow, say them with me.
• 26:04
  Milk, butter, curd, pea.
• 26:09
  And deuce, cow deuce, that if I slurry them up and send that down the hatch, that it's gonna do something.
• 26:22
  The other day, I ate a piece of spinach that was maybe a bit past its time.
• 26:27
  It was a little slimy and a bit weird tasting, and it took me a bit to choke it down.
• 26:32
  It was one of those moments where I I kind of stared into my salad bowl with at the at the remaining spinach, I might add.
• 26:39
  And I really took stock of where I'm at as a as a salad as a spinach eater.
• 26:45
  I really I really thought to myself, you know, there was a day not that long ago where
• 26:50
  I was enjoying chicken and potatoes for lunch.
• 26:53
  I would have a Tupperware of mac and cheese or leftover tacos.
• 26:57
  And now I eat vegetables.
• 27:00
  But I don't eat five parts of cow slurry.
• 27:04
  And you could hear all that and say, I'm glad that they've moved past all this and that no one is eating or smearing cow byproduct slurries on themselves today.
• 27:16
  Incorrect.
• 27:18
  Incorrect.
• 27:20
  Modern approaches to the benefits of Panchagavia do not all ask a person to consume five parts of cow.
• 27:28
  Rather, having identified the potentially beneficial parts of these, they've been isolated and found other non-byproduct sources for humans to get those into their diet and
• 27:39
  supplement routine.
• 27:40
  It's a crazy thing.
• 27:41
  And it should be noted, there are still many people who partake of panchagavia in the traditional sense.
• 27:49
  A mixture of five parts of cow.
• 27:54
  And the traditional dose that is the dose that was held in the past and is suggested today by the Ayurvedic medicine.
• 28:01
  Before looking at the usage, I should say Ayurvedic medicine is medicine that originates from India and focuses on balancing the mind and the body with the spirit.
• 28:14
  In the US and many other countries, these practices are not regulated.
• 28:18
  And rely on herbal remedies with little to no verification of effectiveness.
• 28:23
  Psychosomatic?
• 28:25
  Maybe.
• 28:26
  Questionable?
• 28:27
  Yes, I would say so.
• 28:30
  I'm not a doctor.
• 28:31
  I know I've said that before on the show, and I'll say it again, I'm sure, but I'm not a doctor.
• 28:36
  I'm a I'm a podcaster.
• 28:38
  I'm a youth pastor.
• 28:39
  I'm a special ed teacher, but I'm not a doctor.
• 28:42
  I love bathrooms.
• 28:43
  I think it's interesting that people do this crazy stuff.
• 28:47
  But anything I say is not medical advice.
• 28:50
  So we're reporting information here.
• 28:55
  In the US and many other countries, it's not regulated.
• 28:58
  There's a number of warnings against Ayurvedic medicine, including the interaction with heavy metals such as lead, mercury, and arsenic, exposure to external bacteria.
• 29:08
  As a result, this branch of medicine, Ayurvedic medicine, holds to the traditional dosage of a liquid ponchagavia as 50 milliliters mixed with 200 milliliters of water, to be drank
• 29:20
  early in the morning.
• 29:23
  So you mix up you mix up your your fifty milliliters of of Pancha Gavia, five parts of cow, two of which are
• 29:33
  Waste byproduct.
• 29:35
  It did two two hundred milliliters of water, it's not much, and you down the hatch, shot glass that bee, doink right on down the hatch, really send it back.
• 29:45
  I guarantee you you're gonna have diarrhea by lunch, if not sooner.
• 29:52
  You I think of all these like crunchy granola like smoothie moms that are like, Ugh, I gotta drink my green drink every morning.
• 29:59
  It regulates my biome.
• 30:00
  My gut biome.
• 30:01
  All these all these white women, they're so aware of their gut biome.
• 30:08
  But then they don't drink any freakin' water and they're like, Oh, I'll just have a sweet treat.
• 30:15
  It's like, how about y like, quit worrying about your gut biome?
• 30:18
  You'd a freaking eat a freaking yogurt like once a week and
• 30:21
  Have a vegetable and drink plenty of water and you're gonna sort out a lot of your problems.
• 30:24
  I'm just gonna say, I'm not a doctor.
• 30:26
  I cannot stress that enough.
• 30:28
  But I think on general, eat some freaking yogurt, drink some more water, and have a vegetable, that you don't need to be a doctor to know.
• 30:35
  Like that's probably pretty good advice.
• 30:36
  I could probably do that.
• 30:39
  Children are to be given one to three milliliters of ponchagavia, much less.
• 30:43
  And as time goes on, the modern daily dose for adults has become three to ten milliliters.
• 30:48
  So in modern day, our
• 30:51
  Ayuvetic medicine has gone, you know what?
• 30:54
  50 milliliters is a lot for the cow poop pea and milk slurry.
• 30:58
  Let's back it up to three to 10 milliliters for adults.
• 31:01
  That's that's a that's a fifth or less.
• 31:06
  This branch of medicine warns against, and this is no joke.
• 31:11
  This is this is it.
• 31:13
  The branch of medicine warns against consuming unpasteurized cowpea.
• 31:19
  An unpasteurized cow poop.
• 31:23
  Thank goodness.
• 31:27
  Father, thank you for clarifying to me because I forgot to pasteurize the cow pea and the cow poo before I drank it.
• 31:41
  I can't believe that I was almost as foolish to forget to pasteurize the cow pea and the cow poo before sending it down the house.
• 31:51
  Wild.
• 31:53
  I'm glad they figured out that if they don't modify the pea and the poo, that it makes their tummy really pissed.
• 31:59
  And that they adjusted the plans of how to use Panchagavia accordingly.
• 32:04
  But I do wonder, what's the point of the pea and the poo slurry if you're just going to boil and like remove those parts of it anyway?
• 32:16
  Like, why not just have a glass of milk with some butter in it?
• 32:19
  Like it's very fatty.
• 32:21
  Probably gonna give you some sort of a heart problem, but like it has to be better than eating cow poo and drinking cowpea.
• 32:30
  Much of Panchagavia's modern use is in farming and agriculture.
• 32:34
  And all these sites, even those which sell it, state that you cannot use agricultural panchavia in place of medicinal or ritual panchagavia.
• 32:47
  It exists in two different forms.
• 32:49
  It's a crazy world.
• 32:53
  A mixture of cow stuff, five parts of cow, which include its pea and its poo that people rubbed all over themselves and ate at various points throughout human history, including
• 33:04
  today, at various degrees and at various quantities.
• 33:08
  It's a wild world.
• 33:12
  Listener, if I need to say it, don't eat poop and don't drink pea.
• 33:19
  Again, I'm not a doctor, but I think I'm safe in giving that advice.
• 33:25
  This brings us to the end of another episode of Privy.
• 33:27
  Thank you so much for being here and and joining us for another episode.
• 33:32
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• 33:36
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• 33:39
  It helps people find the show.
• 33:40
  And every rating and review you leave will donate some money to Wounded Warriors International and Living Water International in a reminder to keep pooping in the free
• 33:48
  world.
• 33:49
  This free world was not always free.
• 33:51
  And in pursuit of cleaner water for all, not everybody has it, but everybody should.
• 33:55
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• 33:58
  We got a store link there.
• 33:59
  Go check that out.
• 34:00
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• 34:04
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• 34:04
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• 34:06
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• 34:09
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• 34:11
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• 34:13
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• 34:16
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• 34:17
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• 34:20
  Thank you so much again for being here.
• 34:22
  Keep pooping in the free world.
• 34:23
  Do not drink the cow slurry.
• 34:26
  And now, as always, thanks to Kevin and Poddington.
• 34:29
  Look at the links down below for all our music.
• 34:31
  Don't forget to flush.