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I Would Not Sign-Up for a Celebrity Roast · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I would not sign up for a celebrity roast. It's
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: one more thing.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: I'm it looks like we're canceling the roast, Michael, that sucks.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: We're gonna do a surprise roast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: We got a couple of clips from the roast of
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Kevin Hart that aired somewhere Netflix or someplace the other day.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: But before we get to that, Joe had such a
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: great quote for us during the show today. I wanted
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: to get a framed poster of it.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a Winnie the Pooh and Piglet having a conversation.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: Winnie the Pooh, Pooh as he's known, said, what day
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: is it? Asked Pooh? It's today, squeaked Piglet. My favorite day,
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: said Pooh, which is sort of a sweet simplicity that
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: made the Winnie the Pooh cartoons so wonderful. And it's
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: a beautiful thought.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: And I thought that thought that was so fantastic, just
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: you know, focusing on life one day at a time
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: sort of vibe that. I went on Chat GPT and
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: so where can I Where can I find a poster
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: of this? And there's a lot to get framed and everything.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of really high quality posters of it.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: But chat GBT pointed out, by the way we're telling
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: you that Milne, the guy who wrote Winnie the Pooh, this,
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: he never wrote this. That was never in any Winny
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: the Pooh anything. Ever, somehow it just caught on and
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: became popular and people repeat it all the time and
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: there are t shirts and posters, but it's not actually
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: from Winnie the Pooh, which kind of took the fun
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: out of it for me. I mean, I like the sentiment,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: but I'm not gonna have a Winnie the Pooh thing
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: framed on my wall that is made up. It'd be
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: like a really great quote and you got a picture
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Lincoln on the wall and the quote next. Lincoln never
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: said that, but they couldn't.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: I've actually run into that lately, nice people too, So
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: I just can't get into the specifics. But they have
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: like a powerful quote on the wall, but it's attributed to.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: I don't want to use the actual name Churchill or
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: Lincoln or whoever.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but much more contemporary and it's not a quote
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: from them. They didn't make that up at all, but
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: they bought it and put it on their wall because
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: it spoke to them, like the winning the Pooh thing,
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: which is not Pooh spoke to you. Well, yeah, and
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: I don't want to buy people tell you shouldn't have
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: to go out and do a bunch of research, should you,
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: to make sure that a quote and a poster that
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: you can buy is real out Yeah, yeah, it's not though.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: So we received a number of links to places to
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: buy a poster and a couple of people saying, hey, dudes,
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: I got bad news for you. As we were just describing.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: My favorite one came from John and he sent along
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: a beautiful poster of the quote, slightly changed. What day
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: is it, asked Pooh. It's today, squeaked piglet. You know
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: what the fuck I mean? Said Pooh.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: I like that one. I actually was thinking about allway
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: have on one side, the nice heartfelt one, and then
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: on the other side, don't you know what the fuck
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: I'm asking here?
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I mean the day of the week, asshole.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: That's the director's cut, a stupid, freaking big.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: That's what I get for hagging around with a pig.
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: It's that sort of language that they'd appreciated. A celebrity roast,
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: he says, making a transition. So, uh, the celebrity roasts
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: have been around, well, probably forever, but when we were
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: little kids, they were on TV now and then, and
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: it would be, you know, Frank Sinatra being roasted by
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Don Nichols or Rot Don Ron Dickles, Don Wriggles or whoever,
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: and they were like they were kind of uh, lighthearted
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: jabs as opposed to like meanness.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: Right, might mention that he'd had three wives, you know,
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: but in just a winking way.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: There were jokes like, you know, about how rich you are,
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: or how famous you are, or how good looking you
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: are whatever, you know that practically compliments. Anyway, if you've
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: watched any of the roasts in recent years, the Tom
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: Brady one got lots of attention. I didn't actually watch it,
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: but the roast in recent years are so freaking mean.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: I mean, they're just mean. And I don't know why
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: anybody would sign up for that, to sit there and
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: have somebody just say you suck, you're stupid, and your
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: wife's a whore and that like that's the joke, and
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: then the camera's on you to see what your facial
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: reaction is gonna be, right, I don't understand why anybody
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: does this. Anyway. I watched part of the I've seen
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: part of the Kevin Hart Roast the other night. Sean
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: Gillis was the host. Shane Gillis, Sorry, I'm just making
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: up all kinds of names, Ron Dickles, Shane Gillis, uh
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: and and some of it was really really funny, but
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: some of them was super mean spirited. But one joke,
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: Gillis himself said, you probably should have taken that one
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: out at afterwards. We'll play that one for you in
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: a second, but just to give you a vibe of it,
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: here's the host of the roast making some jokes about
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: Kevin Hart.
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: And speaking of black men who once made an impact
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: years ago.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: Kevin Hart.
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: Kevin has a forty four inch vertical leap and I
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: know that because he can kiss his wife on the lips.
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: Being five to one sucks, but at least you can
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: tell him apart from all the other blacks. Yeah, they
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: told me to be racist, or am I gonna make
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: fun of Oh, you got a huge day and you're
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: a billionaire. Yeah. When you see Kevin stand next to
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: all his normal sized black friends, he looks like the
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: period at the end of a sentence.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: Yes, Kevin, thank you.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah to really understand Kevin's origins, you have to
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: go back to the beginning. Kevin's ancestors came to America
• 5:41
  Speaker 3: in a slave ship in a bottle. He grew up
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: in Philadelphia, where his mother worked at the University of
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: Pennsylvania and his father was one of the California raisins.
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: I'm just joking around. He wasn't raising anybody. Kevin's dad
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: wasn't there for him because he was addicted to coke,
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: which is a lot more respectable to not being there
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: for your kids because you're filming fucking Jumanji three.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: That's pathetic. That's good, Michael, I've pretty joking, pretty funny. Yeah,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: I mean that's harsh because Kevin Hart's talked about how
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: his dad took off on him, was a drug addict
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: and took off on him. And your dad wasn't raising anybody.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: Your dad was doing cocaine. Of course, that's more respectful.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Look not being around for your kids because you're doing
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Jumanji three. I thought that was a pretty funny joke.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: And there was a lot of this. And there's one
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: comedian chick on there. I don't know her, but her
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: husband killed himself jumping off a bridge, and there were
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: endless jokes about that, about her husband killing himself and
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: bridges and this sort of stuff. What the hell now, Gillis,
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: the host, said, I called her. He said, I didn't
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: know if I should make these jokes, and she said
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: it was okay. She felt it was actually kind of
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: therapeutic to make jokes about her husband jumping off the bridge.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: So I got a clearance before I did these, So
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: I thought that was kind of interesting. Actually, my favorite
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: joke is a Golden State Warriors fan was because Draymond
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: Green was there. And uh, and Gillis says, Draymond Green,
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: who has five championship rings, But come on, that's like
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: saying ringo star has eleven number one albums. Thought's pretty funny.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: You're not the star of the team. You just have
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: to be there. Yeah. Anyway, here's the joke that he
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: says in retrospect, he probably shouldn't have told.
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: I know this, Dais is full of degenerate scumbags, and
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: they're gonna be up here saying a lot of racist,
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: terrible things tonight, But not me. I'm not gonna be
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: doing that.
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  Speaker 1: I've got a.
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: Nice PG short joke that i'd like you guys to
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  Speaker 3: be a part of Okay, Kevin is so short. Kevin's
• 7:41
  Speaker 3: so short that they're gonna have to let him from
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: a bonzeie tree. Oh, that was a three weeks of
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: deliberation on that joke. I was, Look, I understand how
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: serious the word linked is, but ponzai is so funny.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's a rough joke. That is a rough joke.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: It's interesting that whoever had that video was leaping the
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: word lynch.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I've heard that five hundred different places and it
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: wasn't bleeped like that anywhere else. Who decided to bleep
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: out a tenth of a half of a second of
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  Speaker 1: the word lynch and thought that was somehow made things better?
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: I know there are some internet sites, social media sites
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: that censor all sorts of stuff, so you like, you'll
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: see it sometimes on Twitter where they use an asterisk
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  Speaker 2: in place of the A and rape, or you know,
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: they don't spell out pedophile because they don't want the
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: algorithm to do something or other. I'm not an expert
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: on it, obviously.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: But that's weird, and it actually goes opposite of the
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: one point I was going to try to make here.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: If maybe we're headed to a Lynch jokes. That's getting
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: way out there. But you know, we've lived through the
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: period where you can't say the N word even if
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: you say, I'm saying this word only, so what we
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: know word we're talking about, and then we're gonna have
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: a discussion about the power of words and stuff like it.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: You say it, you're still gonna lose your job, get
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: kicked out of your college or kicked off the radio
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: or whatever. That's just beyond a idiotic that's pre enlightenment.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: It's some sort of weird Harry Potter stuff. I mean,
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: it's just crazy. And I wondered if making a Lynch
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: joke like that in that audience and everybody, you know,
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: kind of uncomfortably groaning, But it aired and and Kevin
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: Hart laughed with kind of ooh wow, it was rough,
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: you know, that sort of stuff. I wonder if maybe
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: we're moving into an era where we can act like
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: grown ups and not like prehistoric words or magical beans
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: sort of lifestyle we've been going.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: I certainly hope so, because that would mean we're no
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: longer under the sway of the critical theory crowd. Yeah,
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: because that's their say, what you said is problematic. You
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: can't say that that gave me offense. That's a microaggression.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: Words are violence exactly. Your intent doesn't matter, it's just
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: how I receive it, because that's how the silence people
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: and capture institutions put it in.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: Putting in an asterisk instead of an A in the
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: word rape is childish.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's idiotic.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: It is absolutely And that's worse than the idiotic it is. Well,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: it's like I said, it's pre enlightenment. It's some sort
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: of words or letters or magical incantations that can turn
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: you into a frog or something. I mean, it's just nuts.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, can't say Voldemart right. Yeah, I've hated that
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: from the beginning. Now that I understand why they do it,
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: I get it as a strategy. I just I thought
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: it was like stupid, but now I get that it's
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: it's not stupid, it's vicious. But yeah, I don't think
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: you're wrong.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: About it.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: We are in a different era, although well both are true.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: There are all so people in parts of the world
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: that can't be canceled because they don't care. It's like
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: Ricky Gervais always said, can't cancel me cast me from
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: what you going to do? What I do. I don't
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: care what you think. Oh you're racist? Huh no, so
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: are you. I don't care what you say. And there's
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: a certain power to that. Well, we've enjoyed it for
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: a long time, thankfully, you know, Well I probably shouldn't
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: say this picture a person who has convictions in business
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: relationships with people who don't.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: That could go badly.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: Thankfully that never happened.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we've gone so far down this road it's almost
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: hard to remember what it was like in the before times.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: But so Shane Gillis makes that joke. He he, he
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: has said, he has said, you know, when I look
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: back on it, I probably shouldn't have made that joke.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: I saw I'm in a podcast the other day. But
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: he tried out at clubs around the country and he
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: said with different audiences and black and white and stuff
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: like that, and he thought, you know, it gets more
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: laughs and not so. Worst case scenario should be people think,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: oh my god, that's too much. You're probably right. Nobody
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: was hurt, No damage was actually done. Enough people talked
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: about people, nothing actually occurred, and we've we've we were
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: so far down the road of the wolkesters being right
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: that we act like, you know, some damage, some irreparable
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: damage was done. There's there's no fixing the damage that
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: was done by that joke, which is obviously crazy, right.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: It reminds me of Stockholm syndrome where hostages slowly over
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: time they seek they realize their their life, not to
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: mention their comfort, their happiness, their next meal, whatever, is
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: in the hands of their captors. And so they evolved
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: to the point where they're just doing anything they can
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: and to please their captor, to the point that their
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: captor can get out of the truck they're holding them
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: in and go make a phone call, and they won't
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: make a run for it because they just don't want
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: to displease their captor. It's really fascinating and troubling. But
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: a lot of people I think were under the sway
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: or under the threat of the woke crowd, the critical
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: theory crowd, and just so afraid of them. They started
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: to internalize it and say to themselves, what you just said,
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, that hurt people. That did real damage
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: because they're trying to please their their torturers. But no,
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: no harm was done. People were only offended by crap
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: because they chose to be offended by crap. And I'll
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: tell you, the more you know about the history of
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: lynching in this country, the harder it is to take
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: that joke. But we can talk about it. In fact,
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: that would be a good thing, which has been the
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: role humor has played forever. It gives you a little
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: sugar pill to take a hard truth with and then
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: you can talk about that hard truth. Well then that
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: was so evil about the critical theory crowd they prevented that.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Well then we also have the thing that we always
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: play that clip of Ricky Gervais explaining these jokes. What's
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: actually going on there people laughing and groaning is everybody
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: saying together, we don't approve of lynching. That's that's, you know,
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: an awful thing that should have never happened, and you know,
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: joking about it is wrong because I mean, it's all
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: everybody being an agreement on the right side of the issue.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: It's not saying, yeah, it's funny because I think lynching
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: is fine.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: No, it's a double reverse yeah, yeah exactly, and everybody agrees,
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: so they laugh out of discomfort and common agreement.
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: That oh my god, that was out of line. Yeah,
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: but the people laugh and they're uncomfortable. I wonder if
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: the woke people, you know, have taken another step down
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: the road of having power with that airing the way
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: it did that clips certain I certainly hope.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: So it's a good point.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: Well, I guess that's it.