Latest / Murders to Music: Crime Scene to Music Scene (Streamline Events and Entertainment) / When Passion Becomes Pressure: Loving What You Do Without Losing Yourself

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When Passion Becomes Pressure: Loving What You Do Without Losing Yourself · Murders to Music: Crime Scene to Music Scene (Streamline Events and Entertainment)

• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to the Murders to Music podcast.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: My name is Aaron, I'm your host and you guys are in for another great show, so I got to give you an update about this last week, you guys.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: So last week I recorded an episode about our killer year and it was our first year that we had been doing podcasts and in that episode I spoke a lot about the number of episodes that we had and the number of listeners that we had, and so on and so forth.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: And in my world of being a new guy at this, I was getting about 100 downloads a week or so, which was pretty good for me, and while I try not to focus too much on the numbers, it's nice to know that your message is getting out there to somebody.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: So it's Wednesday night.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I recorded that episode about our first year.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: It releases the next morning.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: I'm laying in bed that night and as I lay there, I'm saying my prayers and I'm like dear God, thank you for this and thank you for that, and thank you for this, and thank you for the opportunity I have to record this podcast and to take the message that you've given me and the experiences you've given me and to put them out there to help other people and to give it a platform for your message, not for mine, not for what happened to Aaron as a tale of woes, but more the experiences that Aaron had and how that can help other people, and just put this in the right, in front of the right people at the right time, lord you know, and I went off to sleep.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: So the next morning comes and when it comes I wake up at about seven o'clock and I take a look at my phone and I check the news and I check the this and I check the that, and when I do I take a look at my podcast, because I check the news and I check the this and I check the that.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: And when I do, I take a look at my podcast because I know it downloaded or released a couple hours earlier and I had 13 downloads and I'm like 13 downloads at seven o'clock in the morning.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: That ain't bad, you know.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Normally I have, I don't know, eight or nine at this point, so that was kind of cool.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: So went on to work about nine 30 in the morning.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: I checked the podcast and I had 94 downloads and I'm like 94 downloads.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: That is about what I get in one week, and I've got them in the first couple of hours.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: I'm like this is pretty cool.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: Well, now, it's hard not to focus on that number and see where it goes.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: So as the day goes on, I ended up that night when I laid in bed I had 200 downloads for the day and I'm like that is the biggest day that I have ever had on this podcast.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: So the next day I wake up, go on about my life, check it about midday.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: I've got a couple hundred downloads.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: By that night I had 1.1 thousand downloads, 1100 downloads in one day, and I'm like holy cow, my, it has taken off.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: You know that it's out there somewhere, and these from all over the place.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I've now got, you know, 50, 60, 70 cities, 80 cities that are listening to this, and I've got 400 and something countries and there's just all these podcasts to downloads and I don't know where they're coming from, but it's pretty freaking cool.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: So the next day, another thousand, the next day, another 800.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: And over the last week there's been 4,000 podcast downloads and that is absolutely amazing.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: I'm at 7,800 podcast downloads right now.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: It is pretty freaking amazing and not that it's about the number of downloads, but it's about the fact that the message is getting out there and that God is putting it where it needs to be.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: It's also very rewarding to know that people are listening right and I'm not just doing this.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: It's great to see the effort pay off.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: It's also nice that I understand there's a pride thing there and I need to be sure that I can balance you know the pride issue because I don't want it to become a problem, but I just love the fact that it's getting used and thank you guys so much for listening.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: There's been so many new listeners this last week and I know you're listening to this podcast right now.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for the fan mail.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: Fan mail doesn't mean anything about fan other than it's a one-way communication portal to get a hold of me.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: It's on several of the different podcast streaming services you can send me a message.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Essentially, I've also got an email address where I'm receiving emails from listeners, brand new listeners.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: I'm going to read one of those emails to you in just a second.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: My email address is murders2music at gmailcom.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Murders2music at gmailcom.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Murders2music at gmailcom.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: So if you guys can't get ahold of me in the fan mail or you don't know it.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: You want to send me an email, feel free.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: You guys can become a part of this conversation.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: You can also follow me on Instagram at murders2music.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: I would appreciate any reviews that you guys can leave.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: So thank you guys.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: So much Now, enough about the commercial.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Let's talk about tonight's show.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: Tonight's show is going to be about passion.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: It's going to be about finding your passion, keeping your passion in balance, and I'm going to have some different things that I want to talk about, different ways that I've seen passion over the last month or so and just some things that I've learned kind of throughout the last couple of years.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: Before we talk about passion, let's jump to one of those emails.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: So this email came from a listener and it's so cool to hear just words of encouragement that it's getting out there and getting to people that need to hear it, and it says Aaron, first let me start by saying thank you.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: You've been able to verbalize feelings and emotions that in many cases, I couldn't even put into words.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: You've done an incredible job at humanizing PTSD and the struggles so many of us face when leaving the lifestyle and career we once lived.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: I recently took a trip to pick up my son from college in California and I listened to your podcast for the better part of 12 hours.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: It actually made me acutely aware of the emotional damage I've done and, yes, I get to unpack that now.
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: I also want to say that, while I know you don't feel like a hero, I can assure you that to the families of those loved ones cases you've solved you are.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: I understand you were there on their worst days and they may never want to see you again, but you were the one who stared into the dark and battled what they couldn't.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: I know this firsthand because you solved a case for my partner's family.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: She holds you in the highest regard and often speaks about your humanity.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: Just yesterday I called a couple of buddies sheriffs in the state and introduced them to your podcast.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: Now, these guys aren't your typical cops and I asked them to give it a listen and if they'd consider sharing it with their colleagues and departments.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: And he goes on to talk about the number of episodes and different stuff that I had released.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: And then he signed off and it's not important what his name is, but what's important is, first of all, I don't know this person at all.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: I have no idea what murder he's talking about that I solved, but the fact that it reached out and it hit somebody where it needed to and help somebody heal from the scars and the death by a thousand cuts that we often experience in our job, that was pretty freaking cool.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: I also got a fan mail from a lady out of Portland, oregon that says this.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: It says hey, I discovered your podcast today by listening to small town dicks, which has been one of my favorite podcasts of mine for a couple of years now.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: Right now I'm just trying to figure out how to get to your episodes.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: I can tell you guys this you can find my episodes on every streaming platform out there Apple music, spotify, any of them, just search Murders to Music and it's going to be there for you.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: So that was pretty cool.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for reaching out.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: So I received another fan mail from a lady out of California Completely don't know her new listener.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: She says hey, I absolutely love the J Dobbins book.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: It was a do not put you down kind of book and I hope he's doing well what she's talking about.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: There is an episode that I recorded with Jay Dobbins and it's the episode that talks about the Hells Angels Undercover of Hells Angels.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: Jay Dobbins is an ATF agent that infiltrated the Hells Angels out of the Phoenix chapter, went undercover for two years and ultimately resulted in 55 different indictments of Hells Angels members.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Jay was on the show.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: He tells his story.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: He tells about his time in Waco, texas, during the Branch Davidian issue.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: He talks about his time at Ruby Ridge, talks about his time stopping the bombing of three major casinos in Las Vegas.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: Talks about the mental health side of things, how it affected him, his marriage, the mental health side of things, how it affected him, his marriage, his family, how they burned down his house.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: All of that is on the Jay Dobbins episode.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: Go back and give it a listen, if you have it.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Jay Dobbins is an awesome dude with an awesome story and an awesome heart.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: She goes on to tell me your name.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: She says, hey, I'm a 60 something year old lady, I work for the department of corrections and I've been riding a motorcycle since 2000.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: I found your podcast on Small Town Dicks about an hour ago.
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: Anyhow, just wanted to write you to say hi, glad to hear this exists.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Be well, I love nice people who try to do things for others.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: And she signed off.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: Small Town Dicks is a podcast.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: If you guys haven't listened to it, go listen to it.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: Small Town Dicks is a podcast where I've recorded four episodes now but only one has aired and it's a case study type podcast with three people and a host.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: The three people are all retired cops law enforcement.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: They've been involved in small town stuff as well as solving the Golden Gate Killer out of California and that was the cop that was killing people back in the day and the host of the show is a lady named Yardley who happens to be the voice for Lisa Simpson in the Simpsons.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: Yardley was also on the show Dharma and Greg and has made a life in Hollywood.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: So she's the host of the show and they do case studies and detectives come on or cops come on and they tell these cases and then the other panel of police officers ask questions and digs a little bit deeper and they have this dialogue.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: It's a super cool podcast called small town dicks.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Give it a listen.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: And hey, young lady in California, thank you so much for reaching out.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: A buddy of mine reached out to me this week and he said hey, aaron, uh, there's something I want to remind you.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: He says you know, remember that incident I was involved in last year and my buddy was involved in an incident that he was nearly killed in the line of his duty at work and it was in a pretty traumatic, tragic way he was, his life was nearly taken.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: And I said, yeah, he's like.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: He says you know, today or yesterday a buddy of mine was involved in a very similar set of circumstances and nearly lost his life.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: He said and I'm having a hard time with it and I don't understand why he says you know now, I know what I've been through Isn't anything like what you've been through.
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: And I had to stop in there because we're not allowed to compare.
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: We can't say that my trauma is worse than yours or yours is worse than mine.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: You know, that's not what it is.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: When you step into a pile of shit, it's still a pile of shit.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: I don't care if it's your dog or my dog that left it in the grass, it still gets between our toes and it's gross.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: So we don't get to compare your trauma and my trauma.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: So let's just take the trauma.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: And he says hey, I don't understand why I'm having such a hard time and it's really.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: I'm really struggling and I feel stupid.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: And you know all of this different stuff and I'm like bud, you're feeling this way because your life was nearly taken.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Less than a year ago, something happened outside of your control that you had nothing to do with and, as a result, because you were trying to make a dollar for somebody else and to make a dollar for your family, you nearly traded your life for your loved ones.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: That is, that's an imbalance.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: That is not right, you know.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: That's why this is bothering you.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: You never truly processed it and even if you, even if you had worked on processing it which I'm not saying he hasn't, but it's not going to happen overnight.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: There's traumas that I held onto for 20 years, bro Um, and it's okay to feel this way.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: You're feeling triggered and that's all right.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: You just watched your friend go through something almost identical to what you went through and it nearly killed your friend, and at the end of the day, it's to make a dollar and that is a hard thing to swallow, that is a hard perspective to have that you almost gave your life for somebody else to keep the machine moving forward.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: We've all been there, we've all struggled with things like this and it's okay to have these triggering events and you know it was nice.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: So I tell you guys the story because maybe you can relate to it.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: Maybe you can.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: You can relate to it.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: Maybe you can relate to driving down the road and all of a sudden having a flashback or a memory and it sets you upside down.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: It spins your apple cart around and, before you know it, maybe you don't know which way is up or down, maybe you feel crazy, maybe you feel and you question the emotions that you're having because it didn't happen to you and it's okay.
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: And as I'll talk about me as a human, as a man, I want to suppress those feelings.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: I want to put them into a box and I want to stuff them in the backyard of my mind and I want to bury them about six feet down.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: And I would be willing to bet that I'm not the only person right now that is hearing these words, that want to, that want, that want to process those feelings that way, because feelings are hard.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: Feelings are hard to process, they're hard to talk about, they're hard to think about.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: Sometimes they make us want to cry, sometimes they make us feel weak, sometimes they make us feel sad, Sometimes they make us feel depressed and it's hard to want to process all of those things.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: And all of that is okay and that's what I've had to learn.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: Like I've said on this show before, for years I never processed any feelings or emotions from my partner getting killed in the line of duty my first year on the job to the depression and the suicide and having a gun in my mouth.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: I never wanted to process any of those things.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to stuff that stuff into a small compartment, shove it down inside the recesses of my brain and hope to God that it never came back up.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: And it has taken years of work and therapy and prayer and all kinds of stuff to get those things out and start unpacking those boxes.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: And you know I'm talking to my buddy, I'm like bro, I said where you're at right now you got a box.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: It's kind of unpacking.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: This is an opportunity to take those things, sort them out, process them, work through them and what you're feeling is totally okay.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: Life is good.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: God is giving an opportunity to work through this and to make sense or heads of tails over these things.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: A trauma or a trigger is not necessarily a bad thing if you deal with it and process it.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: So it was pretty awesome to be able to have that conversation and once again be able to experience things in my life.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: While painful at the time, I was able to communicate with my buddy and show some love and compassion there and have an understanding as to what my boy's going through.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: Bro, I know you're listening.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: I really appreciate you for talking to me and opening up and being honest.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: You know, and as I'm even talking about this, I feel like I'm getting passionate about it, and when I talk about passion, I think back to in my college speech class and the instructors like, all right, y'all, we're going to write a speech about something you're passionate about.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh yeah, that's not what she was talking about.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: And I started writing that and it was the wrong topic.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: So I had to change and I actually started talking about law enforcement and I started talking about police work and my experience as an explorer and how I'm going to go into it and I want to save the world one person at a time, and that was what my speech ended up being about, which is totally cool.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: That was what my speech ended up being about, which is totally cool, you know, but one of the things it started that?
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: It started that night in speech class where this first time I ever identified that as my passion.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: Then I go on to get my degree and I go on to become a cop and the next thing you know, my passion is becoming an obsession and my obsession is becoming an identity.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: And then, the next thing you know, I'm starting to forget about responsibilities that I have because I'm so focused on the passion.
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: I'm so focused on the goal or the mission that I have in my head I get tunnel vision and I start looking towards nothing except the passion, the passion of law enforcement and passion.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: In a passionate world you can be productive.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: There's good stuff that comes with passion.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: Passion equals productivity.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: If that's something that blows your hair back and you're excited about, then you jump in with both feet.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: If it's motorcycling and you got a new motorcycle and that is your about, then you jump in with both feet.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: If it's motorcycling and you got a new motorcycle and that is your passion, before you know it you're ordering useless shit off Amazon that you don't need to bolt onto your bike to make it cool.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: You know the stickers you put on your bike don't actually make it ride better or go any faster, but it doesn't stop you from putting those stickers on it, because that is your passion and that's what you're sinking your time, energy and money into.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: So all of that is okay, until it becomes an obsession.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: And I think one of the things I've learned through therapy is, in my world, my passion that I started writing about in that high school speech class became my obsession, which became my identity.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: And then, all of a sudden, the day it comes where I can no longer become a cop, I can no longer be a cop.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: Rather, I can no longer meet the success that I once met.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: I can no longer wear the badge and the gun because I'm injured.
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: And, all of a sudden, my identity is gone.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: Now that obsession that I was sinking all my time into is gone.
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: Now, the passion that I had is not gone, but I can't do anything with it.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: Right, it's like having a car that is full of gas, that is a lot of fun and it's this Ferrari, but you don't have the keys for it, you can't do anything with it and it's just frustrating watching it sit there, go nowhere.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: So that is what the catalyst was for the therapy and to work through this and to balance this out and it allowed me to have perspective that in these passion, in these passionate times or these passions that I have, I need to have some perspective and keep things in balance.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: I need to remember I've got a family.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: I need to remember that I've got friends.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: I need to remember that I've got work outside of law enforcement and I need to distribute my passion and my desires in all of those places.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: You know and I've seen passion a couple of other places recently who is a pastor's kid and a year ago he had a vision to have a corporate or a public worship night at his high school on the football field.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: And, as you can imagine, with the separation of church and state, there are some obstacles that this young man ran into, trying to present the idea that you want to have a thousand kids on a football field, sing, praise and worship music with a live band, preach, have testimony and call people to God in a public environment, at a public school in today's day and age.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: That was an uphill battle for this young man, but it didn't stop him from pursuing his passion.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: So over the last year he has petitioned the school, petitioned the city, spoken to the fire marshal, cut through the red tape, one hurdle after another.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: He named his event Dare to Believe.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: Dare to believe in God, dare to believe that things can happen and dare to believe you can make a movement in this world, in a world where you feel like the cards are stacked against you politically, socially, amongst your peer group, whatever it may be but having the courage to step out in front of that train and try to stop it or turn it around or go the other direction, having the courage to do the right thing or to stand behind the passion that you have or the belief system that you have in a world, again, that is stacked against you, that's what this young man did at 16, 17 years old.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: I think it's probably fair to say that some adults listening to this podcast right now, at 40, 50, 60 years old, have things that they want to do or can look back and think about things, or passions or these crazy outlandish ideas that they once had, that they never really had the goal or guts to stand up and try to pursue, because they felt like the world was stacked against them.
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: So this young man finally cuts through all the red tape and is able to set up his worship night and his worship night was on June 3rd of this year.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: Well, about a month ago I heard about this worship night and I want to be a part of it.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: My business that I have Streamline Events and Entertainment.
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: We do DJ, live music, lighting and sound production for corporate events and weddings.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: Me being a musician my entire life, I understand live music and bands and I've set up for them 500 times, whatever it is, I don't know, a thousand times, who knows.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: So I wanted to contribute to this young man's night and I wanted to donate all of my services for the sound for this, just so this thing can be pulled off, you know, and I want to talk a little bit about my perspective and maybe God's perspective.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: So we went out and we ended up renting a set of speakers for this night.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: Now these subwoofers you can feel the kick drum in your colon.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: It just it was going to be awesome.
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: And that kick drum mic man, properly placed, it was going to sound like an absolute cannon.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Every time that drummer hit the kick drum, the bass guitar was going to rattle through those subs and it was going to reverberate like a concert through the crowd the high end speakers, the mids and the highs.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: Those vocals were going to cut through and pierce and it was going to be an absolute concert on that field of worship, music intermixed with 13 different kids speaking and giving their testimonies about addiction, pornography, mental health, suicide, god dying on the cross.
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: All of that stuff was going to be discussed this night.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: So me and my posse get there and we end up setting up these big stacks of speakers.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: We end up micing all of the instruments, setting out all the monitors, the front of house sound, getting all the instruments plugged in.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: We do a sound check, a line check on everything.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: Life is good.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: Now it is time to start playing music for the whole band.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: Sound check, the band fires up and in about literally seven and a half seconds we blow the breakers in this auditorium.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: It's not even an auditorium, it's an outdoor stadium, football stadium.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: Over the next half hour we spend time trying to eliminate the breaker issues that we're having, and we determined that all of those receptacles in this old stadium are run off of two 15 amp breakers.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: So can you imagine who builds a?
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't put a 15 amp breaker in my chicken coop, much less a football stadium, but that's what we got to work with.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: So we've got two big main speakers, we've got a bunch of monitors for the band, we've got the electric guitars, bass guitars, all of this stuff.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: We've got a digital mixer.
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: All of these things need to be powered in order to put the show on.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: By the way that I see it, in my head and my perspective of this, so as we go through this, it's absolutely clear that every time we plug something in, we instantly blow a breaker.
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: So we're going to have to eliminate some of the stuff that we're plugging in.
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: I ask for the worship leader to gather his people and to start praying, because we need to find a miracle.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: There's no way we're going to generate more power, but we've got certain things that we have to have power to.
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: So we start eliminating things.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: We eliminate monitors.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: Those monitors are speakers where the band can hear themselves on stage.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: We eliminate that.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: We eliminate the subwoofers.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: We take those subwoofers with that kick drum cannon and we turn those things down to zero.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: So there's no boom boom, none of that stuff.
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: All those things are on zero.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: We're able to reroute where we plug things into non-GFI plugs and we're ultimately able to power up the absolute bare essentials that we need to do this event.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: We do a sound check.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Life is good.
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: We kick the show off, 300 kids fall out into that field and all of a sudden, the worship music starts.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: We've got no kick drum, we've got no bass guitar, but we have crystal clear vocals worshiping God.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: We've got a 10-piece band six vocalists, four other musicians, a keyboard player and we've got 300 kids that are absolutely singing and praising.
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: And my mind was to have a concert-like environment.
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: God's plan was to eliminate the noise, eliminate the concert, get it down to the brass tacks of what it was about, and that was the vocals, the message and the word, and that is what those kids got.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Over the next three hours.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: There was 15 songs played, there was 13 different testimonies given and at the time where the speaker and the kid who had this whole idea, you know, was praying and was asking people if they're ready to come to Christ to raise their hand, the altar call across that entire stadium was 300 kids with their hands in the air.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: That is an amazing thing.
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: All of this started with a passion and a dream a year ago by a high school kid that in today's day and age, in this political society that we live in, where there's separation of church and state and you can have multiple color hair and you can fly rainbow flags and all this other stuff that's in schools.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: And you know there used to be a time when we would have to go to a circus to see a bearded lady, but now they're literally everywhere.
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: And you know this is the world is changing.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: The world that we live in is different than it used to be.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: And you know, all of a sudden, to see this kid go against the grain and to be able to bring this corporate worship night to fruition and to see 300 kids praising God and when I pulled that house sound down during one of the songs and heard the vocals, the vocals of the crowd just resonated in the air.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: The other cool thing about it is the vocals were so loud when the speakers were on that everybody within a mile I'm sure, heard the message, heard the gospel and who knows who was touched and reached in the neighborhood surrounding the school.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: It was an awesome, awesome thing to be a part of.
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: It was an absolute miracle and it was because of the passion that this young man had for Christ that this came to fruition and it was super, super dope Passion.
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: I've recently seen passion somewhere else.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: So my son Keegan he has never been a real studious kid and never really liked school, didn't really know what he wanted to do when he got out of school.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: He's been graduated a year, he works at a local Ford dealership and in the last couple of months he's decided that he wants to maybe go into the fire service and become a firefighter, which I'm totally good with because we all know the world needs a few more heroes.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: So he wants to go into this fire Academy and there's a fire Academy coming up.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: His brother, justice, is going to go with him and they're going to do this fire Academy together.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: And like literally, as I record this, we're on about week six of six or something of this academy, and this is an abbreviated academy, meaning that it's just condensed Still the same amount of work, same amount of academics, except it's just in a shorter time frame.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: So I mentioned the word academics and I know that my son is not the most studious of sorts, so I'm a little bit concerned about the academic portion of this.
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: But, and I tell him I'm like dude, I said you got to knuckle down and do this, so you know these.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: They usually have about three chapters a week they have to do.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: Some of these chapters are 200 pages long and then they have to take a test on everything.
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: So and a test at the end of each chapter and then a cumulative test at the end.
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: So, as he, my son, he is dedicated himself for the last six weeks to sit in his room and to study every night and take these tests and he's passing these tests with 90, 95, 98%.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: And his brother is doing awesome as well.
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: His brother was a little bit better student than he was, but Keegan is doing awesome.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: You know, and I see and I hear him talk about these fire things that he's doing and he's getting to go into live fire and he was in a fire last week that was so hot that it burned his, melted his mask and he's just he's excited about it.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: So I asked him the other day I'm like, hey, dude.
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: I said your academy is almost over.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: Man, I know it's been a grind for you.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: Are you excited that it's almost over?
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: And he's like, not really.
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: He said are you excited when you're halfway done with a piece of cake?
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: And I'm like no, not really.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: I said uh, kind of makes me sad.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, me too.
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: He's like I'm enjoying what I'm doing and just to see and hear that passion in him is pretty awesome and, uh, I'm excited for the future, holds for him Right, and it's just, it's cool to see it come full circle and it's just a proud moment for my kid.
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: I'm proud to see him study and I'm proud to see the passion that he has.
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: I'm finally proud to see a spark and excitement in him.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: It's and he's going to be helping people him and his brother get to build these relationships and these memories together and help people and save lives.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: And it's just I'm excited for him, I'm excited for his future and it's super cool to finally see again passion and a flame and a desire where it was once pretty dim and dark.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: You know passion there's all kinds of passions we can have.
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: We can have music.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: For me, uh, being a musician.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: Motorcycles Some people work out.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: Now I don't, because everybody that I know that works out gets hurt.
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: They've all got sprained this or twisted that or their knees are sore.
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: Me healthy as a clam, happy as a clam, healthy as a horse that's what it is.
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: Clams and horses are two different things.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: But I'm healthy as a horse, happy as a clam by not working out, and I don't have sore joints and all that other stuff like these people do.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: So I think they're going the wrong direction.
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: But either way, some people get super passionate about that.
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: Some people get passionate about their work.
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: Remember my work?
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: That became my obsession.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: My obsession became my identity.
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: My identity became a crisis when I lost it.
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: One day.
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: It becomes out of balance and your obsession or your passion can become consuming, and that's what I experienced.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: If I've learned one thing, I have to keep that in perspective.
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: My new world and this new business that I have Streamline, and I'm out there helping people and doing weddings and events all of that stuff is part of my passion, but I really need to keep a focus on it and make sure that I'm not letting my passion get out of control, where I forget the family and the loved ones around me, like I once did, involved in law enforcement.
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: I think that I like doing what I'm doing because I like helping people.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: It makes me feel good.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: It makes me feel good to see joy and happiness on other people's faces and you know, with the wedding industry, I'm getting to help them on their best days instead of their worst days, their brightest days instead of their darkest days.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: And it may sound cliche-ish and silly, but it's absolutely true.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: You know there's a wedding couple.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: So last year I did a wedding show and Keegan and I did it and we contacted 61 brides.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: 61 different brides came through, said hey, we're interested in your services.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: I contacted those brides, ended up booking 13 events off of those 61 people.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: I set an arbitrary number last year that I only wanted to take about a dozen weddings a year, because each wedding that I do has about 40 hours, 50 hours worth of prep work.
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: I always like to meet with my customers in a happy hour environment.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: I want to get out and I want to break some bread with them.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: I want to talk to them, get to know them, learn them a little bit, understand more about their story, because now I can take a personal aspect and a personal approach to that wedding they have.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: That wedding is like a Super Bowl we only get to do it once and nobody's going to remember the chicken or the salmon that they ate, but they're all going to remember the way that environment made them feel.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: They're going to remember the experience that they had from the time they got out of their car to the time they get back in their car, and that experience, the way they feel, that rests on my shoulders.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: I need to make an environment where they feel welcome, warm, I play the right music, I emcee the correct way, I address them the correct way and they just absolutely remember the most epic party they've ever been to.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: That is where I get to come into this, and one way I do that is through these happy hours.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: So I met with a couple this week and I met this couple at the wedding show last year and they she reaches out to me and says hey, I'm interested in your services and I'm like, all right, we can do this.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: I said, let's set up a meeting and talk.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: So the next thing I get from is this email, and the email has got like 47 different questions on there and they're very specific.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: What are you going to do if your system fails?
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: Do you keep a backup?
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: What brand of equipment do you use?
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: Which direction do you point your speakers?
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: You know, if this happens, then what?
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: Then what if this happens?
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: Do you have a contingency plan for this?
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: You know, if this happens, then what?
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: Then what if this happens?
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: Do you have a contingency plan for this?
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: You know what MC, what MC style do you have?
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: What DJ style do you have?
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: Are you a this, are you a that?
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, man, out of all the weddings I've done, I'm not answering all these questions and going through.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: I mean I don't need this, this is too much.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: So I messaged her back and I'm like, hey, I said let's just talk on the phone and we'll figure this out.
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: So that weekend I have another wedding and I go to that other wedding and I talked to the wedding coordinator there and I'm like, hey, elodie.
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: I said look, I got this bride.
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: She's asking me all these weird questions.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: I said I don't know, man, it just feels, it feels off.
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: Maybe I'm not the right guy for this, I'm not vibing with this.
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: And she's like let me read them.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: So I read them to her.
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: She read them and she's like I would, no way I would do that wedding.
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: Uh, it's a bridezilla, this is going to be a problem.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: No, so I'm like all right, I won't do it.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: So the next week, whenever I made that phone call and we had that conversation, I fully expected to tell this bride respectfully hey, I'm probably not your guy, you should find somebody else.
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: However, we get on the call and then all of a sudden, everything sounds okay, she sounds good, and I asked her about it and she's like hey, I got on chat GBT, I didn't know what questions to ask.
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: It told me what to ask.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: I asked them you know sorry if I'm out of line and I'm like all right, totally it makes sense.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: And we ended up booking that wedding.
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: So this week I had a happy hour with them.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: I'm bringing it back full circle, had the happy hour with them and I'm talking to them about kind of our experience together and meeting them at the show and, you know, after a charcuterie board and a glass and a half of wine in, I'm like you guys want to hear something funny.
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: And we're, we're vibing.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: Now, things are going good, we're laughing, we're joking, we're telling stories.
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: I know how they've met I.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: You know we got a lot of stuff in common and these people are super, super cool.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: I really truly dig them.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: They're awesome.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: So I'm like hey, you guys want to hear something Like what's that?
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: I'm like remember that email he sent me?
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: He's like yeah, and I said it almost got you shit can like I wasn't going to do your wedding.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: And she started laughing and she's like I'm so sorry.
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: She said that was chat GBT and you know she's like I could tell in your response that you weren't really into it and I uh, you know we continue to laugh and talk and then we spoke about all the details of their wedding and what we're going to do and how it's going to be an Epic party, you know.
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: And that passion got to come back out.
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: But I just think that you know what a situation that on first sight, because of my passion, because of the way I felt things needed to be, uh, I almost lost an opportunity for this relationship and now I was able to cultivate it, recover it, and now I'm super excited for this and I'm super passionate about doing these people's weddings because I want to do the right thing for them, I want to do good, I want to bring happiness on their best day and I want to just absolutely knock it out of the park for these guys.
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: So what I first thought was passion isn't really passionate at all.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: Passion is that thing that blows your hair back, it's that thing that gets you excited, it's that thing that just drives you from the inside and you can't even explain it.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: But when you're involved in it, you feel the way that you feel and it feels so freaking good.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: Passion can equal productivity.
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: That's totally cool.
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: I have learned through my experience that my passion become my obsession, becoming my identity.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: That is a dangerous place to be.
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: So I want to remind myself in this episode not even you, this probably doesn't even apply to you, but it applies to me.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: Even you, this probably doesn't even apply to you, but it applies to me.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: I want to remind myself that, whether it's the passion of the music, passion of Double Down my band, passion of Streamline my business, passion of my new job, learning new things, passion of helping people, whatever it is, I need to keep this in perspective and make sure that I'm doing things right and that I am focused on what's important.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: What's important to that worship night was not the subwoofer or the bass guitar.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: It was the message of God, and sometimes I get confused in what I'm seeing and I get confused in what I think the outcome should be or what I think is important and at the end of the day, strip all that away, it's not really important at all.
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: You know, what's important is keeping true to yourself, making sure that you keep things in check, making sure that I keep things in check and that we keep a balance in our world.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: The ones that truly love you is your family, those people around you, those true friends, and sometimes, for me, I could let the tunnel vision of my passion get in the way and ruin those relationships around me.
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for listening.
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: Stand by.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: I got some great episodes of snapshots coming up.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: Some quick little stories, 10 minutes or less, remember.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: Reach out to me, fan mail, leave a review.
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: Murderstomusic at gmailcom.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, that is a Murder's to Music snapshot.