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Transcript

Tell us your job in a spooky way with little to no words/context · Johnjay & Rich On Demand

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  Speaker 1: 877-937-1047.
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  Speaker 2: We want you to describe your job in as few
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  Speaker 2: words as possible, but make it sound scary. For example,
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  Speaker 2: for what I do, I would describe my job this way.
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  Speaker 2: You can hear me, but you can't see me.
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  Speaker 3: That is kind of creepy when you really think about it. Right,
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  Speaker 3: with the laugh.
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  Speaker 4: Right, we're just the voices in your head.
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  Speaker 3: What if I'm streaming it live on YouTube? I can
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  Speaker 3: see you. We turned off the cameras. Oh, okay. Okay.
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  Speaker 3: Would you like to try it, Rich? What do you do? Yes,
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  Speaker 3: I would.
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  Speaker 2: Describe your job.
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  Speaker 3: This is not my current job. This is my former job.
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  Speaker 3: I clean up bloody discarded carcasses.
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  Speaker 4: I feel like we have to add the scary laugh.
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  Speaker 3: It really... Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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  Speaker 1: It really helps.
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  Speaker 3: Are we still going?
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  Speaker 1: Sorry.
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  Speaker 2: Describe your job in as few words as possible and
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  Speaker 2: make it scary or mysterious. For example, I brought... I
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  Speaker 2: brought a couple. I teased a little bit and said,
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  Speaker 2: leave us a talk back. So here's like a talk
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  Speaker 2: back of somebody doing it.
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  Speaker 3: Nobody likes us.
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  Speaker 4: Everybody's terrified. And we make you scream.
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  Speaker 2: I'm a dental assistant.
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  Speaker 3: Get it. Get it. Okay.
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  Speaker 1: I'm allowed to go into my work freely. But once
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  Speaker 1: I get inside, it's very hard for me to get out. Also,
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  Speaker 1: I'm surrounded by people who carry weapons, and they use
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  Speaker 1: them on each other, and I have very little myself.
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  Speaker 3: A prisoner.
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  Speaker 1: I work in a prison.
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  Speaker 2: Yes, a prison.
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  Speaker 3: 877-937-1047. You got one, Kyle?
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  Speaker 4: I do.
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  Speaker 2: People paid me to lie inside glowing chambers that slowly
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  Speaker 2: cooked their skins.
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  Speaker 3: I worked at a tanning salon. You guys didn't guess
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  Speaker 3: my former job. I said I cleaned up bloody discarded carcasses.
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  Speaker 4: Were you, like, worked at a butcher place? Meat shop.
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  Speaker 3: I was a maintenance guy at a grocery store, and
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  Speaker 3: I cleaned up the butcher shop when.
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  Speaker 2: They were done.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, okay. High five. Okay, I have one. Hold on
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  Speaker 3: a second. John Jane Rich, good morning.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm calling to describe my job.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, what do you got?
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  Speaker 2: So, basically, I.
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  Speaker 3: Draw all of your insides.
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  Speaker 2: Ooh.
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  Speaker 3: Ooh, are you a phlebotomist?
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  Speaker 1: No.
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  Speaker 3: I draw all of your insides. X-ray tech. Nope. Draw
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  Speaker 3: all of your insides. A radiologist. Oh, you're the same
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  Speaker 3: thing as it was. No. The illustrator for science books.
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  Speaker 3: Good guess.
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  Speaker 1: No, that was closer.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, what is it?
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  Speaker 2: I do all the computer-assisted design drawings for an interior designer.
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  Speaker 4: I was going to say, I was my third one.
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  Speaker 3: I was my third one.
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  Speaker 1: All right.
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  Speaker 3: He didn't laugh after his, though. He was serious. You
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  Speaker 3: want to go to Wicked Ball? You got a pair
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  Speaker 3: of tickets to Wicked Ball? You want to go? Want
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  Speaker 3: to go?
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  Speaker 4: Sure.
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  Speaker 2: What's your name? Yeah, you do.
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  Speaker 3: It's Kent. Hold on, Kent.
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  Speaker 2: Hold on, Kent.
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  Speaker 3: Irene. Go ahead. Describe your job.
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  Speaker 4: People come to me to voluntarily get poisoned.
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  Speaker 3: You're an injector.
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  Speaker 2: You push the vaccine.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah. I was thinking of a Botox person. So
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  Speaker 3: what poison?
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  Speaker 4: Okay, wait. People go to you to get poisoned.
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  Speaker 3: Temporarily. Bartender.
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  Speaker 4: Maybe you're like an allergy tester.
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  Speaker 3: Yes.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, bartender. Oh.
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  Speaker 4: I'm a bartender.
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  Speaker 1: Yay.
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  Speaker 3: That's good. That's good.
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  Speaker 2: That's good. Irene, you want tickets to Wicked Ball? Wicked
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  Speaker 2: Ball tickets for you?
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  Speaker 4: I would love it.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah. Hold on a minute.
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  Speaker 2: Hold on.
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  Speaker 4: Hold on.
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  Speaker 3: Hold on.
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  Speaker 2: Kaisai. Is that how you say your name?
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  Speaker 3: Kaisai? Kaisasi?
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  Speaker 2: Kisasi.
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  Speaker 3: Kisasi. My bad. Sorry, man. So what's your job?
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  Speaker 1: A shadow moving across your roof, armed with steel, tearing
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  Speaker 1: away everything between you and the sky.
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  Speaker 3: He's a roofer. Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: But the way you did that was awesome. Are you
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  Speaker 3: at John Jay's house right now?
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  Speaker 1: Oh, that's good, dude.
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  Speaker 2: That's good. Appreciate the guy. You got it, man.
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  Speaker 3: Thanks for calling in. Okay, Peyton, what's yours?
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  Speaker 1: Okay.
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  Speaker 4: Okay. I would drive around late at night with coolers
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  Speaker 4: full of body parts and blood. And whether someone lived
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  Speaker 4: or died depended on how fast I drove. Yeah, I
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  Speaker 4: used to transport, like, organs from, like, point A to
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  Speaker 4: point B.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, that's a scary job in and of itself.
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  Speaker 3: You don't have to say it's scary. It's just scary. No,
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  Speaker 3: it was.
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  Speaker 4: The beating heart in the back of the SUV at
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  Speaker 4: one point was traumatizing, actually.
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  Speaker 2: Holly, good morning. Describe your job in as little words
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  Speaker 2: as possible. It would be kind of scary and mysterious.
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  Speaker 3: All right.
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  Speaker 4: I bring up all your worst nightmares and make you
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  Speaker 4: pay for it.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, you're my wife? You're a therapist. IRS agent. No.
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  Speaker 2: Nope.
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  Speaker 3: Bring up all your worst nightmares and make you pay
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  Speaker 3: for it.
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  Speaker 4: I'm lying.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, you said IRS. Are you an instructor at a gym? No. Okay,
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  Speaker 3: what are you? I'm a civil litigation paralegal. Oh, that's
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  Speaker 3: a tough one. Thanks, Holly.
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  Speaker 1: Billy, go ahead, Billy.
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  Speaker 2: Describe your job in as little words as possible, but
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  Speaker 2: make it sound mysterious and scary.
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  Speaker 1: I drive around.
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  Speaker 3: And they pick up little children. That's terrible. That's so scary.
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  Speaker 2: I'm hoping you're a bus driver. Are you a school
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  Speaker 2: bus driver?
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  Speaker 3: Nope, I'm a killer. Close transportation for special needs children.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, man.
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  Speaker 2: You're doing what you do.
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  Speaker 3: That might be the best one. You made that sound scary.
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  Speaker 3: You want tickets to Wicked Ball, Billy? You want to go?
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  Speaker 3: It's next week. I do, I do, I do.
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  Speaker 4: I want tickets.
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  Speaker 1: I want them, I want them.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, good.
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  Speaker 3: Hold on, hold on.
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  Speaker 2: Siobhan, good morning. Good morning.
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  Speaker 3: Hi.
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  Speaker 2: Describe your job in as few words as possible, but
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  Speaker 2: make it sound scary and mysterious. I'll always come get you,
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  Speaker 2: but it'll be stranger danger.
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  Speaker 3: Uber driver. Yeah. Oh, that's good.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: Good laugh. That's good.
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  Speaker 2: That's good, Siobhan. By the way, if you don't win
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  Speaker 2: right now, We are having a Talk Back for Tickets
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  Speaker 2: winning weekend for Wicked Ball. So all weekend, we got
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  Speaker 2: your tickets to see Wicked Ball.
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  Speaker 3: It's next Friday, right? One week from today.
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  Speaker 4: You're going to.
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  Speaker 2: Hang out with Kyle and Rich. They're going to be there.
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  Speaker 2: They got $ 15, 000 in cash up for prizes. It's going
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  Speaker 2: to be great. So we're doing a Talk Back for
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  Speaker 2: Tickets all weekend long. So when you listen, you got
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  Speaker 2: to listen. We'll give you a keyword. You call in
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  Speaker 2: as many times as you want.
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  Speaker 3: You can win. And I promise you this. It is
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  Speaker 3: the best people watching of the entire year. Am I right, Kyle? Yeah,
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  Speaker 3: so good.
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  Speaker 2: Lori, do you have a job description? I do.
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  Speaker 3: Go ahead.
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  Speaker 2: I pull dead things out of the ground.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, she's got to be a gardener.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what I was thinking, a gardener.
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  Speaker 3: Landscaping, yes. That's good. That's good, Lori. This is fun.
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  Speaker 3: This is way more fun than I thought it would be. Yeah,
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  Speaker 3: who knew? This is a hoot. Is it not a hoot?
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  Speaker 4: It's a hoot.