Latest / Real Money with Lisa Chastain / The Wealth Mindset Shift That Transforms Your Life | REAL MONEY

Transcript

The Wealth Mindset Shift That Transforms Your Life | REAL MONEY · Real Money with Lisa Chastain

0:09
Yes, we're going to talk about real estate, but what I really
0:12
want to talk about is unpacking your life.
0:15
Fantastic. Well, that all goes together.
0:17
It's kind of unpacking my life a second time around, this time
0:20
physically along with mentally, you know, and take an agency and
0:26
all that other good stuff. But yeah.
0:28
Well, here's what happens. We see we see your Instagram
0:31
page, we see your website, we see all of the success that
0:35
you've created in luxury real estate can and a lot of people
0:38
will assume, well, she's got her shit together and I know you do
0:41
and I also know it's been a road to get here.
0:44
Yes, it's, and that's what I want to start this show with
0:46
because I want aspiring women, especially younger women or
0:50
women of any age who are in it. They're just in it right now and
0:55
they, they can't see how they can have the success that you
0:59
have or I have. And so let's start there.
1:01
What happened that you started unpacking your life?
1:05
What was the thing in your life that happened?
1:07
Well, you know, when I think about success, I think about
1:11
happiness. That's what we all think about
1:12
initially. We think about, wow, we're going
1:14
to be once we get this and have that and all these great things
1:18
and shiny baubles and you know, the cars, all the superficial
1:22
shit. When you don't have it, there's
1:25
a desire for it because it validates you somewhat to
1:29
society with having it all, making it all, being it all.
1:33
And it's a bunch of bullshit, you know, to be honest with you.
1:37
And I realized, you know, there was a point in my life, you
1:41
know, where everything I've built, you know, my image, my
1:44
title, my accolades, my lifestyle, I had to strip it all
1:48
down because I wasn't happy. And every time I realized that
1:52
that was not making me happy because you get to the point,
1:56
you're like, OK, well, I did that.
1:58
Well, I was told I was going to be incredibly happy.
2:02
I felt icky. I felt like I was chasing
2:04
something that I was never going to be fulfilled with.
2:08
Yeah. And it maybe was the.
2:10
Bullshit. What was the bullshit?
2:12
The baubles, the the things, everything that we thought or we
2:16
think validates us. Having the nicest clothes, the
2:19
nicest car, the big house, the swimming pool, the invites.
2:23
And no, with superficial people that probably don't even like
2:26
you and secretly you probably don't like them either, but you
2:29
put up with it. That's the BS.
2:31
That's the stuff that we fantasize being a part of.
2:34
And then when we get there, it's nothing like that.
2:38
You know, I recall it was like everybody was watching,
2:45
everybody's watching you and cheering you on and cheering you
2:48
on and you feel like you can't let them see you crack or sweat.
2:52
But you know, I was always authentic with what I was
2:55
dealing with with in my career as far as real estate, because
2:58
real estate, listen, I, I need to share with agents, especially
3:01
new agents or agents, you know, that people that are thinking
3:04
about becoming agents, it's a real grind.
3:07
It's a tough gig. You have to be all in.
3:10
You can't have one foot in and 1 foot out and you have to stick
3:14
to the process, not the, you know, outcome because it will
3:17
never be the way you think it will be.
3:20
You know, as long as you stick to the process, that's where you
3:23
will start climbing and bringing in or bringing on people that
3:27
are smarter than you, more organized than you, that can
3:30
support you and build you up. Unfortunately, I didn't have
3:34
that initially. I didn't have that even in the
3:36
middle. I was still hustling and banging
3:39
and knocking down every door and posting every Instagram post,
3:43
every Facebook. I was doing it all because I
3:45
felt like no one could do it better than I and I just truly
3:48
wanted to be my authentic self. And I recall having someone take
3:53
over posting a small task, not really understanding what it
3:57
meant. You know, someone told me, why
3:59
are you on social media, Jane? I said, don't you know, social
4:02
media is to market yourself not to, you know, have your cute dog
4:06
up there and this and that. Do you know what you're doing?
4:07
Do you even know if you're being intentional about it?
4:10
That's when that light bulb went off in my head.
4:12
And I went, wow, I'm OK, I get it.
4:15
Well, I'm going to be intentional.
4:16
I am going to share my thoughts. I am going to share my
4:19
experience and wisdom with the people that are going to come
4:21
after me. And even the people that are in
4:23
place right now feel stuck and don't know what they're doing
4:27
because I was there, but I was able to fight my way out.
4:31
And everyone sees when you're at the top, they never look to see
4:35
where the climb started or even when you're in the middle of the
4:38
climb, which is chaos. You're trying to figure this out
4:42
and stay successful and and keep an image and keep, you know the
4:45
outside look good when the inside is feeling horrible.
4:50
Let's unpack that for our listeners.
4:54
Where did you start? And I get it because I'm a blue
4:57
collar girl. Success has been a climb for
5:02
you. Where did it start and what was
5:04
that mess? The mess was just, I would say I
5:06
kind of was sort of an imposter to myself.
5:09
I wasn't really being the Jane that I know I am.
5:13
So it's not like I had to, you know, I've never had to punch a
5:16
clock one, I've always worked for myself.
5:19
So I know what it means to work hard and to really go out there
5:22
and grind and knock on doors and get in front of people.
5:25
I didn't have to learn confidence.
5:27
You know, I earned confidence. I gained confidence by doing,
5:31
you know, a lot of people don't do they think it's supposed to
5:34
just come on, you know, upon them.
5:36
You know, that's something you earn.
5:37
That's something you learn by being out there.
5:41
It teaches you how to grow. And you know, when I realized
5:45
success, you know, by the world standards weren't my standards,
5:49
I had to strip it all the way down.
5:51
And that's when I started finding my voice again because I
5:54
had walked away from social media for a while and everything
5:57
else that. Did you walk away from?
6:00
I walked away from my home. I walked away from my business
6:04
and not ill willed with it. Just a decision, you know,
6:08
because someone shared with me, Jane, not making a decision is
6:11
also making a decision. And that was another huge light
6:14
bulb. And I said, you know, I have to
6:15
stop the bleeding, stop the stress, gather myself because
6:19
I'm no good to anybody else if I'm not strong.
6:22
And I'm always looked at as the strong one.
6:25
So I just kind of packed everything up and said I'm going
6:28
to unpack. It kind of was like, OK, I'm
6:30
going to pack to unpack because I got it.
6:32
I just got to, you know, clear everything out.
6:34
I need some clarity back in my life.
6:36
I need to align myself with what makes me feel good, you know,
6:42
because you. Know women are doing this across
6:44
the planet right now. We had 200,000 women alone.
6:47
Well, 200,000 women is 1 statistic that I've seen that
6:49
have left corporate America since January.
6:53
Another statistic that we've had over 300,000 women of color
6:57
leave the workforce. You left.
6:59
What did you leave? Did you leave real estate or did
7:02
you, did you have to just leave a lifestyle?
7:04
What was it that you were? Leaving, I had to just put
7:09
things on hold for a minute so I can gather my thoughts, so I can
7:12
understand where I want it to go and what I really wanted.
7:15
Because if you don't know what you want, you don't know where
7:17
you're going. That's right.
7:18
You know, you don't even know how to get it.
7:20
That's the first part. You have to know what you want.
7:22
And I've always known what I've wanted throughout my life.
7:26
And I've always gone after it, you know, chased it, so to
7:29
speak. And I tell everybody, you know,
7:32
the, the, the, the success is not in the chase.
7:35
It's in the underbelly. You know, it's in the fire.
7:38
It's underneath that thing you call your stomach.
7:42
It's an underbelly. It's lying there waiting to
7:44
burst out. It never goes away.
7:46
That's where ambition, success, energy, clarity comes from.
7:50
You have to know exactly what you want.
7:54
If you don't know what you want, how are you going to get there?
7:56
How are you going to go? How are you going to tell
7:58
somebody to help you? How did?
8:00
You figure that out. I just did.
8:04
It didn't sit well with me. It didn't sit.
8:08
You know, you, it's this thing that you always have that's
8:10
pulling you, telling you you're not supposed to be here.
8:13
You're supposed to be doing something else.
8:14
And it's not people. It's that, you know, thing in
8:17
your head, you know those two people on your shoulders.
8:20
Oh, you can do it. No, you can't.
8:21
Where are you going? No, you, you're fine right here.
8:23
You, you're comfortable. Don't move.
8:25
And another part of you is saying, well, no, I'm not happy.
8:28
How am I going to make this work if I'm not happy and to?
8:31
Me. Was it a marriage?
8:33
What was it? Yeah, I see you peeling it back.
8:38
It really wasn't my marriage. My, you know, it wasn't my
8:40
marriage. It was a culmination of a lot of
8:42
things, you know, climbing and going into, you know, a business
8:47
and industry that I had gone in before and I knew what I was up
8:51
against. But then when I got there at
8:54
this point, it was a struggle. Then, like I said, I figured it
8:57
out. And then I climbed and climbed
8:59
fast because once and you figure it out, you're gonna keep moving
9:01
and you gonna hire the people around you to take you there.
9:04
Correct. Yeah, absolutely.
9:06
It was about the culmination of things.
9:08
It was marriage, it was business, it was environment.
9:12
It was everything. Everything, Everything just came
9:16
down at once and I had to figure out.
9:18
I had to navigate through it. I had to figure out how to
9:21
navigate through it to get to my happiness.
9:25
When I unpacked everything, I had clarity and I was like, OK,
9:31
now what? Now what?
9:33
What are you going to do? Are you going to stay here?
9:36
Yes, you are you going to stay right in this lane because this
9:38
is your lane. You know real estate, you know,
9:40
you coach people, you understand how this works.
9:42
You have a degree in finance. You, you understand marketing,
9:45
you understand finance. Actually, you kind of like it.
9:48
I'm not going to say I love it, but I do like it.
9:50
It makes things happen for you. It makes me, it allows me to do
9:53
things that I really want to do. It's a engine and energy to, you
9:58
know, my next cause, whatever that may be.
10:01
What changed for you once you once you decided this is a this
10:05
is a critical moment for so many people and I agree.
10:08
For me, I just needed to decide. I needed to decide to get a
10:11
divorce. I needed to decide to literally
10:14
I almost lost everything, which is where that clarity came from
10:18
to then rebuild. Exactly.
10:20
Well, that's the whole thing. You know, you have to build from
10:23
truth. You don't build from your truth.
10:26
Then you're building on all these falsities, aren't you?
10:28
And you're building whatever that is, a House of Cards, and
10:31
they'll come apart either you'll stick there and you'll be
10:34
miserable your whole life, wherever that may be, a job, a
10:37
marriage, you know, family, you know, whatever that may be, a
10:41
church. I mean, you, we take on so much
10:44
that don't belong to us and we don't know how to release it.
10:48
And at some time and point you have to take agency with that
10:52
and you have to live on your own terms.
10:54
And these aren't new terms. You know, you have to know that
10:57
this is who you are and where you want to go and how you want
11:01
to get there. I always tell agents, and I'll
11:04
reflect this back to real estate.
11:05
If you want to make $300,000 a year, how are you going to get
11:09
there back into that form? Because if you back into that,
11:13
then it'll tell you how you're going to make $300,000.
11:17
But if you just put a number up there and, and I ask you, how
11:20
are you going to get there? Well, I'm going to sell a couple
11:22
houses. Well, no, that's not the answer.
11:24
That's not going to get you there.
11:27
That's not going to get you there.
11:29
It was a whole lot to do with everything, you know, as far as
11:32
getting there. But you know, I had to build
11:34
back from truth and I had to build back from inner happiness
11:38
and, and energy and spirit and, and people when they see me now,
11:42
they go, my God, you're glowing. I'm like, wait a minute, was I
11:44
not glowing? That's the vanity part.
11:47
Was I not glowing? I was glowing.
11:50
I mean, I probably was glowing because I was achieving and I
11:54
was definitely committed to the result.
11:58
You know, now I'm committed to the process because everything.
12:02
To the process I. Love that you have to be
12:04
committed to the process and you have to build from truth.
12:07
If you're not building from truth, what are you building
12:09
from? You have to be yourself.
12:11
You have to be your authentic self no matter what you do
12:14
because you know no becomes hard for you when you're not.
12:18
That's right. And when you're true, when
12:20
you're true to yourself, no is very easy because you know that
12:25
in alignment with what you want to do or who you are now, you
12:29
know, I felt like I was becoming, you know, and I'm
12:32
still becoming, but I'm becoming on my own terms.
12:34
I think, you know, sometimes when two people get together,
12:38
man and woman, when two people get together for some odd
12:40
reason, someone, we don't get the memo.
12:43
We are not one. We're still 2 individuals that
12:46
have decided to come together and we can decide to not be
12:49
together hopefully. You unpacked some things, you
12:55
left some things, you took a step into your truth, and today
12:59
you operate in one of the most high pressure, high visibility
13:02
markets in the world. How do you keep performing at
13:05
that level and stay true to yourself?
13:06
Well, again, you learn what you know success is and you learn
13:11
who your clients are. Now that's important to know who
13:14
you're dealing with. And it doesn't matter if they're
13:16
wealthy or they still get the same treatment.
13:18
You can't differentiate treatment and service from 1:00
13:22
to another because one price is lower than the other.
13:25
I mean, your business is gone. If that's the case, it's called
13:28
service and servitude. And you know, you, you take
13:31
risk, you understand people, you sit down with them, you have a
13:36
conversation with them, you listen.
13:38
I think listening is an amazing skill set to have because if you
13:42
don't listen, how will you know? How will you understand?
13:44
How will you know how to move with these people?
13:48
Because everyone is pretty much everyone I encounter are
13:51
strangers. They're not friends.
13:52
I never really sold to my friends.
13:54
My friends didn't have the money to buy the properties that I was
13:56
selling. If they were, I'd probably be
13:58
over there with them. Yeah.
14:00
Yeah. These, these having that skill
14:03
set is, again, something you'd have to hone, you know, and
14:08
craft. And it's a different skill set
14:10
because dealing with people of wealth and staying true to
14:14
yourself, you still have to have enough confidence to deal with
14:18
them because these are people. These are Titans, you know,
14:21
Titans of America. These are people that have seen
14:25
people like myself come and go all day long.
14:28
They run companies. They have board members, you
14:30
know, they have people that answer to them all day long.
14:32
So when you're sitting in front of this type of client, trust
14:36
me, you better be prepared because if you're not the next
14:39
person that's coming up after you to have an interview with
14:42
that person is going to get the job and you're not.
14:44
You have to understand what you're doing.
14:46
You got to stay on it. Yeah, you know, luxury.
14:49
Shit, and you got to know yourself.
14:50
I didn't fit the mold of luxury real estate.
14:52
I mean, that's not who I was. I was an entertainment, you
14:55
know, I had big hair, 6 feet tall, really big hair at the
14:59
time, thin. And I'm knocking on your door
15:02
saying hi. I'm Jane Bond, which you've
15:03
never met me. You only heard me over the
15:05
phone. So you know, I was good enough
15:06
to get into your house over the phone.
15:08
Now I'm in front of you. So now you're casing me out, You
15:12
know, you want to know if I got the goods, You want to know.
15:14
So now I'm in the house. Apparently you think I got
15:17
something because some people won't even let you in their
15:20
home. You know, dealing with a $10
15:23
million client and a $500,000 client and a $200,000 client is
15:29
no different to me. They all get the same service.
15:31
They all get the Jane bond. That's who they want, that's who
15:35
they hire. So I don't turn it over to
15:38
anybody else unless it's turned over to a team that I'm with,
15:43
you know, my team, because you have to, you have to look out
15:46
for these. They're used to service.
15:49
That's what they want. You know, I think the real
15:51
estate industry has gotten away from the service aspect of it.
15:56
Even the well seasoned agents, you know, when I see them, it's
16:00
just different. Maybe, and I said to myself,
16:01
maybe it's because it's a different market.
16:03
I don't know. But to me, business is business
16:05
all day long, all the time. And you show up, there's a
16:08
certain way you show up. There's a certain way you act.
16:11
There's a certain way you have to express yourself.
16:13
You know, you, you have to know the buzzwords of all of your
16:16
industry. At least you can't sit there
16:17
like a deer in headlight. You know, growing up in the
16:21
inner city in Philly, you know, it taught me early to take risk
16:25
and not be afraid, you know, not have any fear.
16:28
I think, you know, someone asked me one time, where did you get
16:30
all this confidence? It's not confidence, It's
16:33
fearlessness to go after what I want and with that some
16:37
confidence because I believe in myself.
16:39
And you have to believe in yourself before anything else,
16:42
you know, before anybody agrees you, you have to walk in your
16:46
own truth to be able to sell your service.
16:49
Now, because anybody can see through a salesperson, you can
16:52
see through them. I mean, unless you get conned,
16:54
that's something different. But a really good salesperson,
16:57
think about it. I don't know about you, but I
16:58
get maybe 50 calls a day, people calling me trying to sell me
17:01
things. I give them a few seconds
17:03
because that's me calling a customer and trying to get an
17:07
appointment with them. So if you're good, I'll listen
17:10
to you. If you're not, I hang up too.
17:11
I'm human, I'm natural. And then sometimes I say, you
17:14
know what, you're really good. OK, I'm giving you 5 minutes.
17:17
Let me know what you're doing. What are you selling?
17:19
So it happens. That's right.
17:21
What are you saying? Of course, of course, you know
17:25
when you walk into a room. You work with.
17:27
That's not built for you or you're not supposed to be in,
17:31
but when you walk in, you know, all the lights come on, you
17:35
know, there's something special about you.
17:37
And once you recognize that you need to hold on to that.
17:41
And I, I think, you know, and sometimes women, we could walk
17:45
in rooms and we shrink immediately.
17:47
Sometimes they shrink because they see another Pretty Woman,
17:50
which is crazy. I had a podcast interview the
17:53
other day in this interview, and she said, I'm going to bring
17:56
back the mean girl phase. And I was like, well, what's
17:59
that? And she says, you know the mean
18:00
girl phase. Why?
18:03
That's what I said. I said why?
18:04
And she said because sometimes I just want to blurt things out.
18:07
And I went, OK, I hope you're editing this.
18:12
That's what I said to her, I hope you're editing this.
18:13
I said, you don't want people to hear that.
18:15
And we had a laugh about it. But yeah, I know.
18:18
Strange thing to say. You know, what's the mean girl
18:20
phase? Yeah, I've never been a mean
18:22
girl. I'm over the mean girl phase.
18:24
I'm over. I'm over.
18:26
I'm building, yeah, I'm building community of women who lift each
18:29
other up and support each other and cheer each other on.
18:32
There's no need for that anymore.
18:34
It's actually a culture of women that's not supporting anybody's
18:37
growth, in my opinion. Yeah, I don't know who they are.
18:41
You know my group of friends and my friends and I love them and I
18:44
have a good time with them. Whenever I see them, we see each
18:46
other. If we don't see each other for
18:47
years, we pick up right where we left off.
18:49
That's right. That's right.
18:51
Those are real friends. I might not see you for 10
18:54
years, but as soon as I see you, I'm like, Oh my God.
18:57
And we're talking about whatever happened 10 years ago.
19:00
So you know, things, things happen in life, you know?
19:03
So. Yeah, but I like working.
19:05
With clients, that's good. I'm, I'm glad to hear that.
19:08
And that's, I know that's a big part of your brand is helping
19:10
people unpack how to get there, how to get where they that they
19:13
like where they are. And same for me.
19:15
I wake up every day in a life that I love with a family that I
19:18
love doing work that I love. And I don't think that we can.
19:21
I mean, what more is there to ask for in this world, right?
19:25
For me, the next level is I want to make an impact.
19:27
I want to make a difference. I want to leave some marks
19:30
behind me. Exactly.
19:32
You have to, this is not, this is not for us to take with us.
19:36
We have to give it back, all of it.
19:38
And that was another turning point in my life.
19:40
I needed to give it back. And even now, you know, with the
19:42
podcast and aging, aging is becoming ageless.
19:45
I mean, all of that. We're giving it back now that
19:48
I'm getting older. Wow.
19:50
I see a lot of things that are changing and emotions and
19:54
everything. I mean, just like you said,
19:55
women, we are out here trying to support each other like nobody's
19:59
Business Today. And I think it's a beautiful
20:02
thing and we're standing up for each other.
20:04
Agreed. And we have to.
20:06
Yeah, I agree. So let's let's talk about
20:08
mindset of the wealthy. I didn't grow up around money.
20:11
You didn't grow up around money. We've been leveling up.
20:14
I've had, you know, I've had days where I wake up and I go,
20:16
Nope, this is not where I want to be.
20:18
Shift gears. You've done the same.
20:20
And you work with clients who have significant wealth and
20:22
influence. What do wealthy people
20:24
understand about money, and specifically about real estate,
20:27
that other people overlook? Well, wealthy people understand
20:31
that money is energy. It's energy.
20:34
It flows toward clarity, confidence, again, validation.
20:38
For a lot of people, power. They don't chase it.
20:41
They attract it. They know how to use it.
20:43
They know how to navigate all the financial vehicles with it.
20:47
They have people to help them. They respect money.
20:51
You know, they have a relationship with money and
20:53
that's a huge part of understanding money is what's
20:57
your relationship to it? You know, how do you see
21:00
yourself with money without money trying to get money, all
21:03
of that. You know, they they attract the
21:06
money through positioning themselves.
21:08
They visualize it and then they position themselves.
21:10
And when they position themselves, they make certain
21:13
moves and they understand how to move within that world.
21:17
And like I said, not all of us are lucky enough to have
21:20
advisors, but we do have friends that can help us.
21:23
That's right. These people have very, very
21:25
smart people that help them navigate.
21:28
They invest in assets, they invest in art, they invest in
21:31
mindset, they invest in relationships.
21:35
You know, that's what they put their money behind other
21:38
companies, building relationships, building
21:40
companies on top of companies. You'd be shocked.
21:42
Some of the things that I've, you know, spoke to some of my
21:46
clients about how they attain their, I mean, one thing about
21:50
Naples, I wanted to do ATV show called the oddities of wealth
21:53
because I met so many people that made their money in strange
21:59
ways. And I was like, wow, really?
22:01
I didn't even know that exists. And they were like, yeah, Jane,
22:03
I'm surprised, you know? And they're doing a gazillion
22:06
pieces that connect the zipper, and they're the ones that are
22:10
making the money. It's crazy.
22:11
So when I hear need them, yeah, that's what they do.
22:15
They find a niche and they go right forward.
22:17
And I think the biggest thing about anyone with money is they
22:23
see money as a tool. And not everybody sees money as
22:27
a tool. Agreed.
22:28
I think that's a great, that's a great way to land that point.
22:31
I had the privilege of interviewing Muhammad Ali's
22:33
granddaughter a few weeks ago, and she was in a conversation
22:39
about not being enough. She's like my, my grandfather is
22:42
Muhammad Ali, and I wake up every single day in the question
22:46
of whether or not I'm doing enough.
22:48
And I think the comparison game gets a lot of people that we
22:52
spend time comparing ourselves versus doing what you just what
22:56
described is get to it, find one thing, find a need and get
23:01
working on it. The comparison game isn't going
23:03
to serve you in. Any conversation right now, you
23:07
can't compare yourself. You know, it's not about how
23:09
much money you have, it's about how much peace you have.
23:13
You know, when you have peace in your life and joy, you know,
23:16
happiness is fleeting. Joy is amazing.
23:20
Yeah. I think as I was growing up, I
23:23
traveled a great deal because I was, you know, in another
23:26
industry and I wasn't as close as I am to my family.
23:29
And I think the one thing that I am very thankful and grateful
23:32
for right now is that closeness to my family again.
23:36
Mm hmm. Like, I see them often.
23:38
We do everything together. You know, I'm always cooking
23:40
dinner for my mom and my sisters, and we just really
23:44
enjoy being around each other. And we get each other.
23:47
You know, sometimes that doesn't happen in friendships.
23:50
You know, you can have a fight with your sister, but you're
23:52
definitely going to see her again or make up with her again.
23:55
You have a fight with a friend. You might ever see them again.
23:57
Now, it might be too detrimental or whatever that may be.
24:00
But family to me is key. And I didn't realize that for a
24:04
long time, you know, and getting back with that unit, knowing no
24:10
matter what happens, they will always be there for me.
24:13
I feel safe again. You know, I didn't feel safe.
24:15
I love that. Yeah, I feel safe knowing that
24:19
family is there. And that was very powerful to
24:21
me. And that makes me feel like I
24:22
can fly, you know, I have no idea where I'm, where I'm going
24:26
to go next, but I know where I'm at now, you know, And it's just
24:29
feels good to sit in my own thoughts, you know, in my own
24:34
brain. And not that there isn't any
24:36
room for anybody within my life now.
24:38
There's plenty of room. It's just I needed this time for
24:42
me. Yeah, and it's so important.
24:44
Everyone gets to that, I think. They do.
24:49
The point of this conversation today is to give them
24:52
permission. 100%. Right.
24:57
You have to take agency today, not tomorrow, today.
25:01
And you have to release the chapters of your life that just
25:05
don't serve you anymore. You know, you need to have a
25:08
waiting to exhale retreat with someone.
25:11
I mean, just go and do it. And all the things that you
25:14
wished you could have, should have, would have.
25:16
And you're older now. Stop thinking like that too,
25:19
because we have a lot of ladies that are going into their 50s,
25:22
sixties and beyond and they think it's too late.
25:25
Well, it's never too late. The statistics say it.
25:28
It tells you it's never too late.
25:30
We got women out there doing all kinds of things at this age.
25:33
They're not fading, they're becoming.
25:36
And I think I believe in my heart that when you do decide to
25:40
get rid of the chapters that don't serve you and take agency
25:43
with who you are, you will blossom.
25:45
You would just glow. You would just everything will
25:48
come to you. Your mind is freer.
25:51
You're not cluttered, you know, with a lot of things in your
25:54
brain that tells you to go one way when you know you should be
25:56
going another way. You know, I think it's
26:00
instinctively as women, we know when we're off, when we're
26:04
completely off, but we're frozen most of the time we're frozen.
26:08
We can't move. And I don't know why.
26:11
You know, we're the mothers of Earth.
26:13
We're the ones who nurtured everybody.
26:14
We're the ones who brought these people here.
26:17
How can you be fearful of that? That's where the strengths are
26:21
coming. Yeah.
26:22
Well, scarcity living. Yeah.
26:24
Living a life of scarcity can be frightening for a lot of people,
26:28
but it just depends on what you want.
26:30
You know, I think when you decide and you make up your mind
26:33
what you want, then you won't feel like you're living a life
26:36
of scarcity. That's right.
26:38
You said something just a few minutes ago that I think is so
26:40
important, and then we're going to transition because I do want
26:42
to talk about real estate to end the show.
26:45
But you said that you felt safe with your family around.
26:48
And so often people are looking that for money to create the
26:52
safety, but it just doesn't work that way.
26:54
No, money doesn't create the safety.
26:57
It's your support system. It's your.
26:59
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't. Money doesn't, you know, safety
27:03
in terms of what you feel is, I mean, what you want to be safe
27:07
from. That's whole nother
27:08
conversation. Safety to me felt feels the
27:11
safety I was looking for, I believe, or coming back to was
27:16
making sure I was loved, making sure the people I was around
27:21
truly loved me. And that was important because I
27:23
felt like I was in an environment where people didn't
27:26
care about me. I was just this person that's
27:29
doing all these things and I don't look like them.
27:32
So it was kind of, you know, I heard one guy tell another, a
27:37
customer at one of my events, she's, we think she's just an
27:40
anomaly. All this work and I'm an
27:42
anomaly. Excuse me, Is it because I'm a
27:45
female and 1st and 2nd, I'm black and I'm in a place where
27:49
nobody looks like me? I don't think so.
27:52
I don't think this is an anomaly, honey.
27:53
I think this is hard work that paid off and you can't handle.
27:57
It. And I don't compare myself to
28:00
anyone. I never have.
28:02
I never thought about that. I just thought about what I
28:04
needed to do to get to where I wanted to go and for me getting
28:09
there. And I still see so many people
28:11
climbing and and for all the wrong reasons.
28:16
You know, I agree. Happiness is not there.
28:18
Happiness is here. It's within you.
28:21
That's why we're having this conversation today.
28:24
Yeah, and like you said, comparison.
28:26
You can't compare yourself. Nobody can.
28:29
No, no, it's not worth. It's not worth anybody's time to
28:31
do that. OK, so let's talk about
28:33
investing. Let's talk about real estate,
28:35
because this is the number one thing that women lack when it
28:39
comes to finance is that women will say they're managing their
28:44
cash flow. OK, they have a decent job, but
28:47
they just, they aren't investing and real estate is risky and
28:52
having gone through 2008, yeah, it's a risk.
28:54
How do you help someone overcome that?
28:56
And what are the reasons to be investing in real estate right
28:59
now for women I. Think, I don't think it's just
29:01
for women, I think it's for anybody that wants to invest.
29:04
It's a smart vehicle to use to create wealth, not only just
29:08
wealth, generational wealth within your family, create a
29:11
legacy financially. A lot of kids that look like me
29:14
didn't have those conversations at home, and nor did we.
29:17
But my mom and dad were entrepreneurs.
29:19
So I kind of watched carefully and saw our lives change when
29:23
they weren't all. My mom was not an entrepreneur.
29:26
She was a nurse, and my father retired her.
29:28
And, you know, the business we were in was very risky, you
29:31
know, bars and nightclubs. I watched people get, you know,
29:34
murdered. I've watched people lose their
29:37
brains, you know, their minds because someone drugged them.
29:40
I mean, it wasn't a great environment, but then again, it
29:42
was a great environment. It was an environment that I
29:44
learned how to handle life and how to, you know, grow with it
29:48
and, and just be aware of my surroundings.
29:51
Also, great parents, great siblings, but we never really
29:55
talked about real estate or finance.
29:57
I kind of caught on to that on my own and then went on to
30:01
school and always come back and educate my family on it too.
30:05
Because we all own our own homes.
30:07
That's not an issue for us, But to me, I think women should look
30:11
into investing more, but they have to understand how to use
30:15
that vehicle because everything you read about owning real
30:19
estate, it doesn't live up to it unless you know how to utilize
30:22
it. Yeah.
30:23
And there's so many vehicles out there to attain real estate and
30:27
utilize it, you know, as a vehicle and to purchase other
30:31
properties and pass it on to your family members so you can
30:35
create generational wealth. And so you have to have those
30:38
conversations. Also, I think a lot of women
30:41
don't take the time to get the education they need to move the
30:45
way they have to through the real estate industry.
30:48
And then you have to get someone that's really educated that can
30:51
help you understand how to use the vehicles because there's so
30:55
many different vehicles out there to purchase property.
30:59
That's right. It just depends on your
31:00
situation and you can utilize it to purchase numerous properties.
31:05
That's right. What are some of those starting
31:07
points for women? There's, you know, loans like
31:10
the DCI think it's called the DCRS, you know, where it's debt
31:14
to debt, service to income. There's 1031 exchanges if you
31:18
have property already. I think there's another one
31:21
called the five O 1. I think the 1A or something.
31:24
I'm not that familiar with it because I don't do a lot of
31:27
finance deals. Most of my deals have been cash
31:30
throughout my career. Yeah, that's.
31:32
Another thing. They're large deals and the
31:35
people that are buying the properties, and initially they
31:38
weren't, I think I might have had five finance deals in my
31:41
entire career. And I've been in this business
31:44
for almost 21 years. So, you know, that opened my
31:47
eyes too, you know, to the level of wealth there is because
31:51
wealthy people trade properties all day long.
31:53
That's right when the market crashed, that's when they make
31:56
their money. They buy and hold, buy and hold,
31:58
you know, or sell at a high value.
32:00
And that's how they keep creating their wealth.
32:03
So even at a lower level or you know, a less expensive level,
32:07
you can do the same thing and build on top of it.
32:11
You know, people flipping houses, people are buying multi
32:14
units and they're living in them and they having other people pay
32:17
the mortgage for them. The debt to income service where
32:20
you can buy a multi unit property where you don't have to
32:24
put down, but so much because the income that's already being
32:29
yes, that's already being received.
32:30
And rolled. Basically there's a rent roll
32:32
already on the property. For the current owner, you take
32:35
that over and they convey everything else to you.
32:38
You just have your down payment. Boom, you here it is you're a
32:41
1015 unit owner building, you know, owner of a building.
32:44
So it's so many different vehicles and so many ways to
32:47
generate wealth through real estate.
32:49
It's just a matter of finding what works for that client and
32:52
having that conversation and sitting down with them,
32:54
appealing everything back because you know, clients, some
32:57
clients don't want to share everything because sometimes
33:01
they're a little embarrassed about about their situation.
33:04
But they should take that help that you're offering them
33:07
because you could possibly straighten everything out for
33:10
them with a couple of phone calls and they don't.
33:13
Give it all the time. It's fear again, of not knowing.
33:18
And I fear, yeah, shame, fear, lack of, you know, finance.
33:23
But there's, like I said, there's so many services out
33:26
there that can help them get to that next level.
33:29
And I think the first part is to be educated.
33:32
Agreed, get the get your education, understand what the
33:34
language is. When I became a financial
33:36
advisor I felt like I was learning a foreign language.
33:38
So level up your language. Level it up.
33:42
Yeah, every transaction is different.
33:45
Every transaction is different. It doesn't matter if it's a
33:47
finance transaction or yeah, I mean, I'm in New York now.
33:50
I'm doing real estate. There are co-ops there.
33:51
I've never done a Co-op before. I've never sold the Co-op.
33:54
And there's so many layers to that.
33:57
I had to learn all of that before I even made a sale, you
34:01
know? And then in Philadelphia, we
34:03
don't have any co-ops. We have condos and townhouses
34:06
and row homes. And in Naples we have mansions
34:09
on the beach. Yeah, you do.
34:11
Forty, $100 million. So going through all these
34:14
different markets, I mean, I'm not going to say I'm lucky, but
34:18
I do have my license in them and understanding them, you know,
34:21
really sitting down, understanding how the market
34:23
works and being able to articulate that to a customer.
34:27
When you're in front of them, they're going to suss out if you
34:29
know what you're talking about or not.
34:31
They're going to feel comfortable or they're going to
34:33
walk away and they're going to God.
34:34
I'm not using her or they're going to walk away.
34:36
You know what? I need to get her number, take
34:37
down everything she says, and I need to meet with her again.
34:40
Yeah. And basically that's how it
34:42
works. Yeah, the reason I OK, let me
34:45
back it up. So I'm a Vegas kid, and I'm sure
34:48
this works the same way in big cities, other cities, other
34:50
places. But what I know for sure is that
34:53
it's not what you know, it's who you know.
34:54
To a certain extent. What would you say different
34:58
than that? Because for me, it's been in the
35:00
right rooms with the right people, learning from the right
35:02
people, having the right relationships, getting the right
35:05
introductions. I started this podcast 1 so
35:07
people can get to know you. So you can, they can, you know,
35:10
listen to your podcast, they can find you on Instagram.
35:12
But you said to a certain extent.
35:14
And in what way? Well, just this little caveat to
35:16
that you know, it's not you know who you know and what you know.
35:22
It's who you know, what you know and who likes you.
35:24
That's the big part. And who likes you?
35:26
Who wants to do business with you?
35:28
And I always tell people, you know, people are always
35:30
surprised. I can't believe I was invited or
35:33
I can't believe this is happening to me.
35:35
I said, sweetheart, don't you believe or don't you know that
35:38
you are being talked about before you're invited into that
35:40
room? So you're doing something right.
35:43
Don't feel like, Oh my God, it's that you're the luckiest person.
35:46
No, you earned the right to be in that room.
35:48
People are talking about you before you get there, and that's
35:51
the important part. It's what you do before you get
35:53
to that room that gets you in that room.
35:55
So it is who you know, what you know, and definitely who likes
35:59
you. Who.
35:59
Likes you. I love that.
36:01
OK, so this is a this is a great way to close the show.
36:03
I had so much fun with you today.
36:05
Thank you for sharing what you've shared.
36:07
This is my rapid fire round. It's my this or that edition.
36:11
I love playing this game with my guests.
36:13
I love playing this game with anybody.
36:15
And so I've got some questions for you, and I just need you to
36:17
answer one or the other. Are you ready?
36:19
All right, high heels or bare feet at the beach.
36:23
I could do both, both of those girls.
36:27
Which one is most like you high? Heels. $1,000,000 Listing or
36:32
dream vacation villa. $1,000,000 listing or Dream Vacation Villa?
36:36
I think the $1,000,000 listing would work for me.
36:39
I like the I like the chase. I like that.
36:42
Yeah, I like the challenge also. Yeah, me too.
36:45
I'm a sucker for a challenge. Yeah, definitely.
36:48
Jet set Luxury or quiet sanctuary?
36:51
Both. I need both give it out to me.
36:54
Hi, didn't you look at my gram? I need both in my life.
36:57
I like but would see. I think the jet set part comes
37:00
from being a flight attendant. Like I think that's where
37:04
unpacking, packing, unpacking comes from.
37:07
I mean, I'm a damn good Packer and one I'm always off somewhere
37:12
like I cannot stay still. And I said that to my mother the
37:15
other day. I said I think it came from
37:16
being a flight attendant at a very young age, always having to
37:19
leave and I feel comfortable packing up my bag and just
37:23
taking off. I love that.
37:25
I love that espresso martini or green juice.
37:28
Espresso Martini. Power suit or flowy dress?
37:30
Power Suit. I love that about you.
37:32
I'm just being very honest. I'm I'm not the flowy dress.
37:35
I can deck a dress, but I am definitely the power suit girl.
37:41
I have no idea where that came from, but I just always loved a
37:44
good suit and even a tie on a woman, you know, I think that's
37:48
very sexy and and it shows strength.
37:51
It shows that, you know, you're fearless.
37:53
It's like being that bull on Wall Street, you know, or the
37:56
girl that's on Wall Street being fearless.
37:58
Windy. That's how I feel.
37:59
So, yeah, no, definitely a power suit.
38:01
I don't think I'm, I'm not a girly girl either.
38:04
So yeah, a lot of people, I think a lot of people know that
38:07
already. OK, well now I know that about
38:10
you. Philly grit or Miami glam?
38:13
Philly grit. Definitely Philly grit.
38:15
No question. No question about it.
38:17
Philly, New York, grit. That's who I am.
38:20
Yeah, that's where I got my warrior scars from.
38:24
Definitely Philly. Miami is something a little
38:26
different. That's for the girly girl.
38:28
Yeah, that's for the girl that loves the sun, the beach, the
38:31
water. I'm a skydiver, hiker, mountain
38:34
climber. I'm not even a boater.
38:36
No, I'm none of those things. I'm the rough girl.
38:39
I'm the tomboy. I'm definitely the risk.
38:42
Yeah, I'm the risk taker. If you say to me, Jane, let's go
38:45
skydiving, I'm like when? Yeah, let's, you know, and I
38:50
love that too, but I don't know if I can handle that anymore.
38:53
But I do love it. I'm think I'm getting a little,
38:55
maybe I'm a little too mature for it.
38:57
Sometimes things scare me, but I love being scared.
39:00
So I'm going to the Bates Motel this weekend with my family.
39:05
I love that. That's awesome for Halloween,
39:08
right? Yeah, we love my family is weird
39:10
like that. We like scary movies.
39:12
We kind of sit. Yeah, I have 5 sisters.
39:14
So we sit around and we watch movies together and I cook
39:17
dinner or somebody else to cook dinner and we're like sitting
39:19
there waiting, having a good time.
39:22
So we're close knit family and I miss that so much.
39:25
Lisa. That's the one thing I did miss.
39:28
Welcome home. Yeah.
39:30
Thank you for that. Yeah, it's been a year and a
39:32
half and I've totally gotten settled in.
39:35
Yeah, get excited. I'm glad.
39:37
Well, I'm excited to see where you're at in a year from now.
39:39
I know it's going to be exciting.
39:41
I'm grateful for you. I'm grateful for the for the
39:43
platform that you've built, for the courage that you exude.
39:46
It is, it isn't confidence, it's courage and it's being fearless
39:50
and it's taking risks and it's following your heart.
39:53
And you've been an extraordinary guest today.
39:55
Thank you for showing us that wealth isn't about what we have.
39:58
It's about what we believe we can create and who we are.
40:02
Absolutely. Have an abundance of joy.
40:04
That's what's important. Happiness will come and it's
40:07
fleeting and it will go. But the next day is nothing
40:09
wrong with still being joyful in your life.
40:11
You know, it's family. Yeah, yeah.
40:14
That's what I've learned. It's been a road to get here.
40:17
But wow, it's it's definitely different.
40:20
In a good way. Oh, I didn't know it would be
40:23
different, no. One ever.
40:24
I didn't. Right.
40:26
How did you feel? How did I feel when when I
40:28
started over? Yeah, for you, that's what it
40:30
is. Well, you're living proof that
40:32
women can redefine success and own their future, literally.
40:35
So thank you for being here. And I'm excited to see where
40:38
you're at in a year from now and for all the things to come.
40:41
Check out Jane, all of her informations in the show notes.
40:43
Jane, thanks for being here today.
40:45
Thank