Latest / Mountain Mover's Prayer / Friendship Moment: How to be a safe place
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: Hi, this is doctor Joe Williams with our friendship moment.
- 0:04Speaker 2: You know, I know you've seen those memes and polls
- 0:08Speaker 2: where people are saying encourageers also need encouragement. Well, the
- 0:12Speaker 2: truth is that that is the truth. We all do
- 0:15Speaker 2: need encouragement. But I wanna talk about being a friend.
- 0:18Speaker 2: Are you a safe place? Right?
- 0:20Speaker 1: I'm not gonna come on social media and tell you.
- 0:23Speaker 2: All my uglies and all my woes, even though some
- 0:27Speaker 2: of you may be sympathetic.
- 0:29Speaker 1: That's just not necessarily a safe place to do it.
- 0:32Speaker 2: So you gotta have some people in your life that
- 0:35Speaker 2: are those safe places. One thing about being a safe
- 0:38Speaker 2: place is that you are a friend ready to be
- 0:42Speaker 2: a friend, meaning that.
- 0:43Speaker 1: You are ready to.
- 0:45Speaker 2: Be that place where you are a brother in a
- 0:49Speaker 2: sense or a sister in a sense, and you are
- 0:51Speaker 2: ready for whatever adversity will come. Part of what being
- 0:55Speaker 2: a safe place means is there gonna be some times
- 0:58Speaker 2: well I just need to.
- 0:59Speaker 1: Be able tell you what's going on and I need
- 1:02Speaker 1: you not to judge it. Can I can I see
- 1:04Speaker 1: some raisins in hand?
- 1:05Speaker 2: How many times have you told somebody what you feel
- 1:09Speaker 2: and before you can get it out, you know, they
- 1:11Speaker 2: trying to come up with a response because they ready
- 1:13Speaker 2: to tell you, a girl, you just need to do this.
- 1:15Speaker 1: A boy, you need to do that. You need to
- 1:18Speaker 1: do this, and you need to I need know. What
- 1:20Speaker 1: I need from you is validate where I am.
- 1:24Speaker 2: I'm not ask you to agree if I'm in the
- 1:25Speaker 2: wrong place, but I just need you to validate where
- 1:27Speaker 2: I am.
- 1:28Speaker 1: So one of the first things to be a safe place,
- 1:30Speaker 1: you got to learn how to be a listener.
- 1:32Speaker 2: Listen for understanding, listen and even listen prayerfully, listen with
- 1:41Speaker 2: your heart.
- 1:43Speaker 1: Listen.
- 1:44Speaker 2: And then oftentimes what I do after I've heard what
- 1:47Speaker 2: somebody says, because my husband and I we've done this
- 1:49Speaker 2: off and is we do a talk back so that
- 1:52Speaker 2: I understand what you said.
- 1:54Speaker 1: I can relate it back to you, what you what.
- 1:56Speaker 2: I heard you say is so that way I know
- 1:58Speaker 2: that I heard you. After I've heard you, then I
- 2:01Speaker 2: validate you as my friend. And all the time I
- 2:05Speaker 2: tell people, thank you for trusting me with that important thing,
- 2:09Speaker 2: because every now and the's somebody and this week I
- 2:11Speaker 2: needed my girls.
- 2:13Speaker 1: I needed my.
- 2:13Speaker 2: Friends to come in because I was having a big
- 2:16Speaker 2: adult meltdown and I needed to be able to say hey,
- 2:19Speaker 2: this is what I'm feeling. Guess what they didn't do.
- 2:21Speaker 2: They didn't instantly jump in and try to fix it.
- 2:24Speaker 2: They let me share what I felt. So I just
- 2:27Speaker 2: wanted to drop that that little piece of wisdom today.
- 2:30Speaker 1: Part of being a good.
- 2:32Speaker 2: Friend is to start off by being willing to listen.
- 2:36Speaker 2: I think I'm gonna talk to you some more about
- 2:37Speaker 2: what it means to be a safe place, But the
- 2:39Speaker 2: first place is you got to learn how to listen.
- 2:42Speaker 2: Are you listening to your friends? And do you have
- 2:45Speaker 2: friends to listen to you? Because if your friends don't
- 2:48Speaker 2: ever listen to you.
- 2:49Speaker 1: You might need some no friends. I just thought idea
- 2:52Speaker 1: that all right, have a great day on purpose. Bye bye,