Latest / Reality TV Cringe / 156: Vanderpump Rules - Season Finale (S11 E15)

Transcript

156: Vanderpump Rules - Season Finale (S11 E15) · Reality TV Cringe

0:10
Hello, and welcome to Reality TV Cringe. I am one of your hosts,
0:15
the Redhead Delia here with my real tight homegirl and my daughter in law
0:21
Beatrice. Everybody, Beatrice, there's something about you tonight. You're looking a
0:26
little different sexy. You're giving me a different vibe. What did you do?
0:33
I can't tell. I can't put my finger on it. You know,
0:35
I just woke up like this. Well, whatever it is, it's
0:39
working for you money. Thanks. We are gathered here today to talk this
0:42
season finale of vander Pump. We made it. We made it to the
0:49
n Honey. Now, before we get into all that jazz, we just
0:52
want to remind you to please had your wife and had your kids. This
0:55
is a politically incorrect podcast. We say a lot of bad words, we
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have stupid opinions, and we are unapologetic about it. So if your susy
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old, you might want to find yourself and then a dumps the baby.
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But if you're down and you're ready, just have a good time. Welcome
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dumpsters. So thank you in advance, please and thank you. Okay,
1:44
So before we get into the episode, there was some news in the vander
1:49
Pump universe a little bit. Oh okay, it's this rumor that La La
1:55
might be defecting from vander Pump Rules and heading on over to the Valley.
2:00
Oh baby, what do you think about that? I don't like that.
2:02
I don't want to see Lala on two Bravo shows, especially not the Valley.
2:07
What if it's only on the Valley and no longer on VPR, then
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maybe, But I'm like, ugh, I don't know. She's annoying me.
2:15
She annoyed me this whole season. She annoyed me in this last episode.
2:19
We'll get to it, but I'm just like, I'm over her.
2:21
I'm over her as well, and it just comes off feeling very entitled,
2:24
like you know, it's not working for you at VPR anymore. So let
2:28
me just go over to this trash fire and make it worse over there,
2:31
Like, we don't need any of that. What we actually need from Lala
2:35
is some growth. Yeah, it's some personal development, it's some therapy.
2:38
Yeah, she's an angry person and we don't know why. Well, she's
2:42
fucking crazy. And she says she's growing, she says she's in her soft
2:46
era, but I don't see it only hard edges. Yeah, what I'm
2:50
picking up from her. Now, let me ask you. At the end
2:53
of the Vanderpump episode, it kind of felt like not a season finale,
2:59
but a series finale that was actually gonna be my hot take today. Oh
3:02
it was? Was that? Well, why don't you talk about it?
3:05
Yeah? No, I literally thought it feels like a series finale, Like
3:08
they're showing flashbacks to the beginning of the show and earlier seasons, and I'm
3:13
like, what, honestly good? Because yeah, it seems like we don't
3:19
got nothing else to offer beside Scandabal and his stupid redemption arc. But like,
3:24
what else are you gonna do? I don't know, platform Sheena Moore
3:29
because they seem to really like doing that. Then that takes me to my
3:32
take, So my take is that I feel like a dumb dumb I went
3:37
into this season really thinking Ariana was gonna look like a mean girl. Yeah,
3:42
I was really buying what Lala and I think Shina was saying, like,
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Oh, by the end of the season, you're gonna see she's like
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got a big fucking ego, she's a problem, and so I thought that
3:53
we were gonna get even a little bit of that. But honestly, Ariana
3:57
has held herself with such compos and dignity yep, and righteousness. Like when
4:02
she's talking to the producer tonight at Kyle Chan's whatever whatever, I'm just like,
4:06
oh my god, talk I I I like Ariana. Coming into the
4:14
season, I didn't really like Ariana that much. Yeah you didn't. But
4:17
I like Ariana a lot more than I like Lala and Shina me too.
4:21
The only thing for me with her is that she did kind of lie in
4:25
this episode when she's like I never said I wouldn't be friends with anybody whose
4:29
friends was said about, I'm like, you did, yeah a lot,
4:32
but that's okay. I'll give you a pass. But I liked her this
4:35
episode. I'm like, work, bitch, Yes, she stood on business
4:40
yes, exactly what she's been saying this entire time. It's not like she's
4:44
flip flopping like Shina does in like virtually every episode. When she's talking to
4:48
Ariana, she's team Ariana. When she's talking to Tom, she's team Tom.
4:51
And I'm sick of her and her apples too, and her good as
4:56
gold bullshit. And it was cringing so deeply when she was performing with the
5:00
twenty sevens. I'm like, you are almost forty years old, yes,
5:03
Like the landscape changes when you're in your forties and then you barrel like a
5:09
locomotive into your fifties, and like, is this all you're giving? Is
5:13
this narcissistic self absorption? Because ugh, I can't stick? And did you
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see her outfit too, She's like thinking she looks so cute and that weird
5:23
little rocks out cool to oh my god, brocks out. I know the
5:27
all gold suit have to be in the center of everybody's attention, I allow
5:32
to me. The other thing that I wanted to say in my major takeaway
5:36
is that despite like how I feel about Lalla and Sheena and Ariana, I
5:41
do have to agree with some of the sentiments which are basically, Ariana,
5:46
what are you gonna do? Though, like you are part of an ensemble
5:48
cast, you have every right to be pissed off. You have every right
5:54
to have boundaries and to maintain them. Yeah, but at the end of
5:58
the day, you're gonna have to put yourself out there in an authentic way
6:02
with this cast. Unless they change the castah, unless they stop the show.
6:06
You're gonna have to come back and give something authentic and have conversations that
6:11
you might not want to have otherwise, what are we doing here? It's
6:14
like the Ladies on Potomac. It's like Giselle, who does not want to
6:17
film with Candice, Well, that's untenable. It's like on Beverly Hills when
6:20
they're icing out one of the housewives. It's like, this is your job,
6:25
show up and do your fucking job, I guess. And so that
6:28
came from Lalla a little bit, like we heard that throughout the season,
6:30
and she especially said that tonight. And I'm not saying I agree, but
6:35
there's a kernel of that in terms of like the business, in terms of
6:40
the show that is very practical, and so Ariana is gonna have to make
6:44
some decisions. Do you want to come back to this shit show, right
6:46
and just not talk to people. That's not compelling television to me, Like,
6:50
we got a whole season of that. We can understand it, But
6:54
what's next? Right? I mean, I guess that's a fair point in
6:57
terms of like what else are you going to do on the show? Else
7:00
can you provide? But like, in my opinion, I'm like, it's
7:02
a problem with Bravo. It's a problem with Bravo's contracts and being like,
7:05
yeah, you have to be around this abusive narcissist whether you like it or
7:11
not, and you have to be able to deal with these uncomfortable conversations with
7:15
him and be triggered by him constantly because it makes good television, you know
7:18
what I'm saying, Like, Ariana is a human. If we're gonna sit
7:21
there and humanize Sandabal, we need to humanize her too. And like you
7:25
said, she's allowed to have boundaries and everything. But I guess I see
7:29
your point, Like she how is it sustainable right into like subsequent seasons,
7:33
Like how do we continue to do this? Like Ariana, what else though,
7:36
are you bringing to the table besides something about her? And this is
7:40
something that Laala has said on repeat, and I hate to actually agree with
7:44
her on anything, but she's like and she said it in the after show.
7:46
I think she said something like, you know, Ariana brings fucking nothing.
7:49
She's a non motherfucking factor. She doesn't have storylines. She hides behind
7:54
Tom. Tom is the one who shows up to everything. Yeah. I
7:57
don't really agree with that, because I think Arianna does bring something to the
8:01
show, but like what's next? Yeah, and like, what else do
8:05
you have to offer besides your upsetnessts? No? For real, and like
8:09
the whole purpose of the show is like to be crazy and to be drunk
8:13
and like to cause drama and be self centered. So like Arianna, it
8:16
seems like it's growing out of it and just being like I'm over it,
8:20
Like fuck all of y'all. I'm here getting my back blown out by Dan,
8:24
like peace out. And she's got all these fucking brand deals, Like
8:26
does she even need the paycheck from Bravo? Well, money runs out,
8:31
you know, tame runs out. The shine that's currently on her may or
8:35
may not run out. I think Founder Pump's a great vehicle to keep some
8:37
of that shine on her, and if she continues to conduct herself with dignity.
8:43
I think she only opens up the opportunity to get more Yeah brand deals,
8:46
So I could see why she'd want to come back. But like,
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now you're gonna have to figure out who you're gonna be and who you're gonna
8:52
let us see. Right, that's a good point. So those are my
8:56
thoughts. Wow about a good done this season and about this episode. So
9:01
let's get into it, babe. All right, Well, like we have
9:03
a couple things going on, we have before Kyle Chan's event and Kyle Chans
9:09
event. Okay, I don't remember anything before kr I mean pretty much there
9:13
was nothing besides like Laala saying that Dan's a fucking square and I'm like,
9:18
girl, you are so jealous, you are so bitter, so bitter.
9:22
It's giving miss Andre, yeah a little bit. But like he's such a
9:26
decent man, he's so great. He's clearly on this trip to San Francisco
9:31
purely to support Arianna in the ways that she wants him to show up for
9:35
her. Leg Yep, he's doing everything right. And the only thing you
9:39
can do is covetch about how Ariana said like he will throw hands if you
9:43
come at me. Yeah, and she calls that being a square. Now
9:46
that's called being like a partner. Yeah, somebody who's supporting you. I'm
9:50
just so jealous. She's so jealous in every way. After her fucking relationship
9:54
with toad Man ends, she ends up single. She doesn't get a hot
9:56
ass man who's flirting with her in a meat starts banging her back out like
10:01
Ariana, and then she doesn't get all these brand deals and dsw and all
10:05
this shit. So yeah, she's fucking bitter and jealous and it's kind of
10:09
cringe. Well, doesn't Shena address this a little bit In the after show.
10:13
She's talking about how there's been a few people on the cast who have
10:16
gone through pretty bad breakups and have had bad betrayals, bad things happen to
10:20
them, but the world didn't stand behind them like they did for Ariana.
10:26
And she's like, you know, and so of course I'm happy for her,
10:28
but at the same time, like, why didn't I get any of
10:31
that? And you've got cast members who are saying, like, why didn't
10:35
the audience show up for me that way? And it it's interesting. I
10:37
think it's because we've all gotten older. Yeah, we've all got our own
10:41
families now and our own marriages now, and so it hits a little different
10:45
versus when we're in our twenties and we're just drunk all the time, right,
10:48
And I mean, arian and Tom had a nine year relationship and that's
10:52
serious, and they got a fucking house together, Like that's a big fucking
10:54
deal for him to just be fucking her best friend, raw dogging her best
10:58
friend for nine months or whatever. So I don't know, I'm just I
11:03
think these women are so fucking jealous that it didn't happen for them. I'm
11:05
like, that's embarrassing for you guys, yes, honestly. And then we
11:09
have the whole like lunch date in Chinatown, right, yeah, and Sandoval's
11:15
not there, but Dan, Arianna, James, Ali, all of them
11:18
are there, okay, And Laala is interrogating the fuck out of Dan.
11:22
Why is she doing this for production? Is she doing this because she's a
11:28
jealous hoe is she doing this because she's genuinely curious? And this is how
11:33
she fact finds. Either way, it's very inappropriate to do that to the
11:37
guy at the table who's new to the group, and she feels it's just
11:39
the thing with Laala, she feels so fucking entitled to do whatever she wants
11:45
whenever she wants to, and you can't call her out, but she stands
11:48
ready always to call everybody else out. So hypocritical, it's super hippus.
11:52
Would she like that if she brought a dude? She wouldn't let anybody do
11:54
that to Randall? Really no, And she wouldn't let anybody question their relationship
12:00
all the clip back to Katie. Yeah, sitting down outside of sir,
12:03
and Katie's like, well, we're just supposed to pretend you're not dating a
12:05
married man. She lies about it. Yeah, No, she would not
12:09
brook any questioning, any criticism of Randall for season after season after season.
12:16
So it's like really rich, Yeah, to have you sitting down in non
12:20
King and just drilling this guy who's nothing but a good person, Like by
12:24
all appearances, it's probably because she's attracted to him, and she's fucking jealous,
12:28
because Arianna's got this hot ass man who's totally into her and he's like
12:33
so awesome, Like he's like talking about why he loves her, why he
12:35
well, not loves her, but like why he's attracted to her and everything,
12:39
and she's so empathetic and so graceful, and you know, she talks
12:43
about how she was attracted to him and like they're just like always holding hands
12:46
and always cuddling. I'm like, I like them. Yeah, why wouldn't
12:48
you. They seem great, they seem well adjusted, they seem calm,
12:52
they seem into each other. I'm nothing but happy for them. And I
12:54
don't know why the group is like judging Ariana for moving on from Sandoval like
13:00
eight days after, Like they're saying, oh, she banged him eight days
13:03
after. The whole skinny didn't though exactly. So I'm like, why why
13:07
are you coming for Ariana when you're not coming from for Sandoval who fucked her
13:11
best friend for over a year and some of you knew about it and just
13:16
kept it a secret, like fuck y'all right honestly, yes, So yeah,
13:20
that was pretty much it with that. Well, another thing happened,
13:22
which is when Tom said something about Tom Sandival. Schwartz said about Tom Sandoval,
13:28
like he's not a trash person. He's a person who did a trash
13:33
thing. And then Ariana across the table said no, we're not talking about
13:35
that in my presence. And if you don't like that you can go now
13:39
that butted up to me, that butted up against decorum, Like Arianna,
13:48
you can go if you're uncomfortable, and if this is offending your boundary about
13:52
talking about Sandoval in a group setting, you can get your your ass up
13:56
and you can go. But to tell somebody with such authority, don't speak
14:01
like this in front of me and you can go, I'm like, who
14:03
the fuck do you think you are? And nobody says a word. No,
14:07
not Laala with her big fucking mound Schwartz knows better than to say anything,
14:13
but like nobody challenged it at all, which kind of goes toward some
14:16
of what Lala's saying, either in the After Show or in this episode,
14:22
where she's like, no, it was in the after Show, like nobody's
14:24
saying anything to her. Like she's giving all of these edicts, all of
14:28
these directions, telling everybody how to act and feel, and we're just letting
14:31
her. She's like, get the fuck out of here with that. And
14:35
in this particular moment in this scene, I could see that, now,
14:41
come at me, bro I know people are standing hard for Ariana, but
14:43
I'm just trying to be fair like that wasn't very nice. Yeah, it's
14:50
a little hard, And I know she's coming from the place of like being
14:52
triggered that anybody could think that Sandoval is a good person in any light.
14:56
And I understand that because she's been like that Sheena all season and La La
15:01
all season. I get it, but like, maybe slow your role and
15:05
just be like Schwartz, I don't want to hear about that, please,
15:07
right, let's not talk about how he's a good person because he hurt me,
15:09
Thank you very much, Like you can be a little bit nicer about
15:13
it. But Katie also does kind of defend her too and is like,
15:16
yeah, he's a piece of shit, so maybe shut the fuck up,
15:20
Schwartz. And Schwartz is dumb for even bringing it up. He knew what
15:22
he was doing. Well, Katie starts arguing with Shena, right, Yeah,
15:26
Sheena is starting to talk about I don't know the sound guy every time
15:30
she talks. First of all, I hate how she talks to me too,
15:33
so annoying. Her affect is annoying. I start to lose consciousness and
15:37
go into another astral realm. Yeah, but she's talking about Tom, and
15:41
Katie says something like, when are we gonna stop talking about this asshole all
15:46
the time and defending this asshole all the time, Like I don't want to
15:48
talk about this anymore, right, which is a better way to approach it
15:54
than what Arianna did. Totally, and then Brock has to chime in,
15:58
fucking it all triggered. Fucking hate him. He's such a piece of shit,
16:03
and he's like, starts going after Katie because she's saying that, and
16:06
he's like, well, but you don't understand she has had this best friend
16:08
relationship with Senavl for fifteen years. Why can't you go see your perspective,
16:12
Like, oh my god, nobody cares what your opinion is. Brock,
16:17
Well, he cares what his opinion is. And he's so annoying. He's
16:21
in every single group scene. Why is he here? Why is he on
16:23
my television on the wrong side of history every single time and presuming to tell
16:29
the women how to feel about this kind of a betrayal and how to feel
16:33
in their hearts about it, Like, shut the fuck up, stop man
16:36
explaining to me what it feels like to be betrayed on this level. You
16:38
ask whole go take care of your kids, go back to Australia, get
16:42
off my television. Pray Broke. He's such a fucking loser. I'm so
16:48
tired of hearing it. And I'm so tired of this Brock and Sheena storyline
16:52
about Santaval so boring. I don't fucking started with Shana yep, and it
16:56
ended with Sheena. I littlebody asked for this much. No, not at
17:00
all. And I don't care that you guys were friends with him for so
17:03
long and he gave you money and that's why your suging is dick so much.
17:07
Fuck y'all both. But maybe, as we have discussed before, maybe
17:12
Lala and Sheena can sense that Ariana's out the door, like Ariana is already
17:18
thinking like I don't think I can do this anymore. I don't know if
17:21
I have to do it anymore. And so they're trying to take an active
17:23
position with the person who's going to stay, which is Tom Sandoval, which
17:27
means if that's the case, that they're motivated purely by greed, yeah,
17:32
which would makes sense. And advancing themselves yeah, makes sense for a bunch
17:34
of vapid, self centered assholes. So and then I wrote down this note
17:40
because while I was watching this episode last night. I pay for the Peacock
17:44
with ads because I am cheap and I don't watch a lot of shows on
17:47
their business expense. We're professional rack clones. This is a professional dumpster.
17:52
It's four ninety. I never watch anything on Peacock really unless it's for the
17:56
show, and I don't care because I can get up and like do my
17:57
stuff during the ads. Anyway, after this whole scene with like the lunch
18:03
and everything, the first ad that came up was an ad for Ariana's DSW
18:07
campaign, and I was like, yeah, yeah, so good because it
18:11
was right after like Lala and she and I are talking about her, and
18:14
I'm like, chef's kiss. So good. And then we have Schwartz going
18:18
over to Joe's room and the only reason why this is important is because he's
18:22
such an asshole and he's talking about how she basically looks like a child who
18:27
got into her mom's makeup anytime she wears makeup, like a party clown.
18:30
And I'm like, fuck, this guy. Does he make comments like this
18:33
about Katie like onn ironically? Yes, I mean, throughout the years he's
18:37
put her down a lot for a variety of things. But I mean,
18:41
notwithstanding that Schwartz is an absolute asshole. Yeah, I mean, Joe is
18:48
insufferable. I mean, I know there's a reason people are calling you a
18:52
meth head, and yeah, and I don't agree with that, but like
18:55
you act weird, you act wild out in these streets, Like calm down
18:57
just a little bit. Not everything was a joke a gag, right,
19:00
Not everything is funny. She's just very annoying to me. Another one like
19:04
why are you in this show? Why are you peripheral to this cast in
19:08
the show? Get off my television. May I never see you again?
19:12
You know, I literally don't care about you and Swartzish storyline either, unless
19:17
you guys are fucking and actually dating. He doesn't want you, honey,
19:19
You sad out here. Although he was checking her out in that room.
19:22
I caught him several times he was looking at her ass He's gross, he's
19:26
disgusting. And then we have Schwartz also going over to Sandoval's room to download
19:30
him about the whole lunch with Dan and all this stuff, and Sandoval's like,
19:34
yeah, I want to talk to Ariana, and Schwartz is like,
19:37
that's not a good idea, not really feeling that for you, Saneval's like,
19:41
yeah, but I just like want her to know that, you know,
19:44
even if it's ten years down the line, I'm always gonna be there
19:47
for her. I'm alwaysrmative. We're so theatrical, so dramatic and fair.
19:52
What a fucking narcissist? Okay, show of hands. Does anybody believe that
19:57
Tom Sandoval is legitimately remorseful, not because he looks bad to the world,
20:03
but like legitimately remorseful to Ariana for the things that he has done, because
20:08
I don't think so. No, I don't see it at all with his
20:11
one glister and tear or his vising eyes. Yep, I believe Arianna in
20:17
the end of this episode when she talks about how he never says anything to
20:21
her off camera, he only tries to talk to her in front of the
20:23
camera, in front of the audience to show, oh, look at me,
20:26
I'm such a stand up guy. He's a piece of shit, honestly.
20:30
And then we have Kyle Chan's event, okay, and this is where
20:34
everything kind of goes down. First of all, Marianna and Dan looked foy.
20:40
They did. They looked hot, hot as hell. They looked way
20:42
better than Sheena, sorry forty. I thought he was younger than her.
20:47
I think she's thirty seven, thirty eight something like that. He looks good,
20:51
he looks great. You know, I like a pan Asian American.
20:55
I do my results. Yeah, yeah, I do like it. I
20:59
just think he's handsome. But you know what, he's mature. Yeah,
21:02
he knows how to keep to himself. He knows to have that steady,
21:06
stoic energy like that you don't want to fuck with because you will find out.
21:10
But on the other hand, he's just very gracious, just a nice
21:12
person, can assimilate into the group very nicely. I wonder if we're going
21:17
to see him next season. Yeah, Marianna's going to be on it.
21:19
If he's going to even want to do this, I'd like to see more
21:22
me too. I really like him. I think he's a pretty cool dude,
21:25
and he gives her like a calm energy. I think he helps kind
21:29
of ground her a little bit, because otherwise she's a little bit crazy.
21:30
But they looked great. Sina also has like a weird segment where she's like
21:36
making it about her, making this whole thing about her, and she even
21:38
says that in the interstitial, so I'm like, is this current day?
21:44
Are those recorded current day and she's seeing what people are saying. Yeah,
21:47
I don't know about current day. It's probably recorded around the time of the
21:51
reunion, which was filmed what a month, a month and a half ago,
21:53
two months ago, So by then, because this started in January,
21:57
she was already getting the feedback. And I think it was Laala who says
22:02
in the after show that SA stays connected to her social media. Her mom
22:06
sends her negative feedback on social media, her PR person sends her feedback,
22:11
negative feedback on social media. So she's really plugged into what everybody is saying.
22:17
So by the time we're getting her talking head saying, well, but
22:19
I guess I'm making it all about me. Yeah, the AI is becoming
22:22
self aware, just becoming self aware. I'm just like, why would you
22:26
say something like that if you think that it's a joke, or like,
22:30
if you think that it's baseless, Like, we don't know what we're fucking
22:33
talking about. This whole entire season has been all about fucking Sheena Marie and
22:37
her stupid fucking band and all of her music and Nanny, her relation with
22:45
Tom, how it hurt her I'm like, how did it hurt you?
22:48
You only benefited from what Tom did. Seriously, what did it cost you?
22:53
I don't trust anybody anymore. When Brox sayes Lala, I don't know
22:59
if they're fun, I'm like, Okay, that's a problem. Go get
23:03
a therapist. I guess she tried to go the doctor. Couldn't take the
23:06
soul off, but like keep trying. I mean, seriously, she's I
23:10
know, there's different kinds of narcissists, Like there's very malignant, confident narcissist,
23:15
and then you have those narcissists narcissists who need to make it all about
23:19
themselves because they're so insecure inside. Yeah, whatever that's called. That's what
23:25
she is, like a very vulnerable inwardly, very very non confident, confident
23:30
person. And that's why it's so insufferable anytime she's on the show, because
23:33
it's like, oh my god, it's a black hole of need, so
23:37
much need and so cringey because I'm like, grow up already, forty and
23:41
that's okay forty, Like listen, I'm I'm way older than that. Like
23:45
go ahead, live your life, feel good about yourself. But like the
23:48
songs that you're singing singing are like teen songs. No, seriously, you're
23:52
not a teen. It was so cringe. When we get there, we'll
23:55
get there, we will get there. I stopped it though, I WhatsApp
23:57
to you? I like, I literally the secondhand cringe embarrassment is making me
24:03
uncomfortable. I have to walk around my home. I've got to do laps
24:07
because this is so terrible. I couldn't even watch it, Like I just
24:10
listened to it and I'm like, I can't and like the montage of everybody,
24:14
We'll get to it, okay, it's so cringey. Then we also
24:15
have James and Ali. They were kind of cute though him prefacing is love
24:19
in the parking lot. That was sweet, okay, fine, and then
24:22
Sandobal sand of all goes up to Brock and he's like, I just want
24:26
to thank you man for like always having my bag and like I really appreciate
24:30
you, and then gives them a bro hug and then Brock like proceeds to
24:33
lecture him like he's been doing all season because apparently he's the arbiter of morality,
24:40
and I'm like, shot the fuck up. He's like, yeah,
24:41
but you know you gotta keep doing what you can do to make amends to
24:45
people, like shut up Rock. Seriously, he's never gonna do it.
24:48
You know he's never gonna do it, and I don't want to hear it.
24:52
Why would anybody want to take advice from fucking brock right, like talk
24:55
to your kids. You literally hit women. I'm sorry, but go away
24:59
a person. I'm sad with your male rage get fucked. And then we
25:03
have everybody kind of sitting down in their little VIP section. And this is
25:07
where Sandval goes up to Dan and says, Hey, I just wanted to
25:11
say I'm Sandval or Tom and I'm really happy for you guys. I wish
25:15
you guys the best. I just want to say nice to meet you.
25:18
And it leaves, which I thought Dan handled pretty well, very much so.
25:22
And also Ariana didn't do anything either. She was just on her phone,
25:26
didn't say anything to him, didn't escalate at all. She literally just
25:30
disconnected, which is totally fine. But some people online are actually coming for
25:34
Ariana after this episode. Why, Like we've already had a few people dms
25:37
on Instagram. Be Like, I thought Ariana was being a big old bitch
25:41
and I don't know, I mean, what is she supposed to do look
25:42
up and talk to Tom Sandival No, I know, I'm like, what
25:45
do you want her to do? But some people really didn't like Ariana this
25:49
season, so but I thought it was very performative that he went to go
25:53
up and say hi to Dan. I thought that was really gross and I
25:56
had been intending to do it the entire time. And this is just another
26:00
like puzzle piece in his redemption arc. He wants to make himself look like
26:03
the bigger man, the hero when somebody's popping off in the party, Like
26:07
he wants himself to project that. Yeah, that's why he had to do
26:11
that. And I think Ariana knows that he's doing it for camera time.
26:14
He's doing that for audience approval, and that's why she's paying him. Dust
26:18
I'm not even going to look at you. Oh yeah. And Ariana inner
26:21
interstitial even says like I'm not going to be a cog in the Tom sand
26:25
of Aal redemption arc machine, Like she's calling out the producers for this stupid
26:30
fucking narrative that you've had all season to try and get us to like stand
26:33
of all right, which is insane to me. And people are making memes
26:37
about that on Instagram, already saying they fucked up, Like this season is
26:41
so good. That's why I think they're putting it on pause because I think
26:45
the production company needs to regroup figure out what the fuck are they doing,
26:48
because they're definitely sending mixed signals with the various montages Ariana, but also about
26:55
Tom, like the hot mic at the end of this episode. It's like
26:57
the editors have so much power and influence about how we ultimately feel about the
27:03
shows and the caste, So what do you want us to feel? I'm
27:06
a little bit confused. Yeah, it's very weird. And like when Laala
27:10
goes on her rant about how this show is very real and it's very honest,
27:15
I couldn't. I think, what are you talking about? This season
27:18
felt so fucking produced, Like all of you guys are fucking lying. What
27:22
did Lala show of her life? Exactly? I mean, she showed us,
27:25
I guess, her sperm journey. She showed us that she's got an
27:29
apartment and her mom is over. But like, literally, you're jabbing at
27:32
Ariana for bringing nothing, but like you brought nothing except to instigate and to
27:37
be a producer. Plant that's all you brought and it's boring. Af.
27:41
The reason we watched this is because people aren't aware of themselves as reality stars
27:45
and get themselves into actual situations, have actual conversations and fights, and that's
27:51
interesting. Yeah, but this is not interesting. This is predictable. Laala,
27:53
You're fucking predictable. Yep, You're not as smart as you think you
27:56
are. You're not a fucking thug either, Lady. I know you're gonna
28:00
come up and meet the wrong one for shocked, shocked that she hasn't yet,
28:04
I know Lauren from Utah Yo. Yeah. And then after Sandoval greats
28:11
Dan, then we have some rando who's like trying to get into the VIP
28:15
section and then he is like drinking everybody's drinks and then he starts fighting the
28:18
security guards and throwing glass and that was pretty entertaining. And then Sandoval of
28:23
course has to interject himself into the situation to act like he's the fucking hero
28:29
when the security guard's already taken care of it. Bro right. Well,
28:33
there have been some pictures floating around the internet of that guy and Tom and
28:41
that guy and Billy Lee and that guy and some of Tom's other crew like,
28:48
the theory is that that was staged, and they staged it so that
28:52
Tom could Russian and be the hero and further this redemption art stop. No,
28:57
like, that's Tom's friend and they planned it so that that would happen.
29:03
Yes, wow, because to me it felt very forward. What's going
29:07
on? I'm very strange. Why are you attacking a security guard for actually
29:10
no reason? I know, I mean it was entertaining. It's like very
29:12
dramatic, but I'm like, and then why is Sandival trying to be like
29:15
exactly what's going on? Just getting on? Let me get this cherry.
29:18
I'm a good guy. I'll throw myself in the middle of this melee to
29:22
help whoever. I'm a good guy. Yeah, okay, yeah, mister,
29:26
I paint my fingernails like you're not gonna do shit. I'm sorry.
29:30
What do you have against men who paint their against perfectly fine? One of
29:33
my very best friends paints his nails on. I don't have anything wrong with
29:36
it. I'm just dogging on his appearance because I hate him so much.
29:40
Okay, that's why I will allow it. Because he's a loser and he
29:42
acts like he's this tough guy. But I'm like, you're not You're a
29:45
guy from fucking l an do. Yeah, you're not gonna do shit.
29:48
Stop acting like a the like law law. It's so ridiculous. And then
29:55
we have the Sena Marie performance of Apples and Good as Gold mm and it
30:03
was horrible. It was really fucking that. And she was performing with the
30:07
twenty sevens. Okay, her band. I guess that she's gonna go on
30:11
tour with did I dream that We had a conversation in which you told me
30:15
I was a part of this lay mass? Who ass so embarrassing. I'm
30:22
embarrassed for her. I mean, okay, if she had talent, yeah,
30:27
if she had something creative, like substantively creative to offer, I'd be
30:33
like, Okay, you're a little bit long in the tooth for the industry.
30:36
Don't come at me. This is California, this is holly weird.
30:37
True, yeah, you're a little long on the tooth to do it,
30:40
but like you've got actual talent, so yeah, go out there and try.
30:42
But she know you don't have any talent. There's no reason you don't
30:45
have a series of fucking number one hits. It's because you can't sing your
30:48
autotuned death. I know. I'm like, are you lip singing on this?
30:52
She's singing over the track. Okay, that's what the track is playing
30:56
loudly and she's singing along to it off key. Yeah, nobody wants no.
31:00
It's it's so cringe. And then Sandoval again is like cheering her on
31:06
and he's like smiling and he's like, oh, yeah, I know.
31:07
I didn't like Apples at first, but now it's growing on me, and
31:11
I'm like, this is all just for your redemption art. It's so cringe.
31:15
But then you have Arianna and even Katie in the crowd. They know
31:18
each and every word. Yeah, that they are supporting her. I thought
31:22
that was really fantastic. Girls supporting girls, even though she and a you
31:26
male sympathizer, you don't do that for them. But getting ahead of myself,
31:30
yeah, oh and I fucking forgot. But Joe goes up to Katie,
31:36
Oh, I really want to talk about yes with you, so tell
31:40
us what happens. Well, Joe starts talking with Schwartz at first, and
31:44
she's like, I really want to like apologize to Katie, but I also
31:47
want her to apologize to me for being so mean and Schwartz is like,
31:51
yeah, I think it's good to do. It's good do it, which
31:53
is so mean because he knows how Katie's gonna, definitely knows who Katie is
31:57
as a person. And then she goes over there and she goes, I'm
32:02
sorry if I hurt your feelings, Katie. Katie immediately pounces on her and
32:07
she's like, you're sorry if you're sorry if you did hurt me, and
32:12
proceeds to dress Joe down deeply. I mean, so Joe changes how she's
32:19
apologizing. She's like, Okay, I'm sorry that I did these things,
32:22
but that's not enough for Katie because Katie's really pissed off. And this was
32:27
really toxic af of Katie, really toxic af of Katie. You have proceeded
32:34
to go on and have a couple of different relationships with other people. You
32:37
even had a relationship with Max Boyan's for whatever reason, Like you're living your
32:42
life. Tom's out here with his girl having his life. Get mad at
32:46
Tom, right, I mean, by all accounts, you weren't actually really
32:52
friends with Joe, like you were acquaintances. That was Kristen's friend, so
32:55
she knew of Joe. But this is not like they hung out a lot
32:58
together. It's not like they were deep friends, and so the way that
33:01
she came at her was so mean. That's the Katie that I remember from
33:07
seasons before. That's the Katie that I used to hate on vander Pump Rules.
33:13
That's the woman hating Katie that she didn't need to do all that.
33:16
Joe, for as quirky and weird as she definitely is, and also for
33:22
as inappropriate as she was to send her a text, Hey, I support
33:24
you and then go fuck your man, that's inappropriate. She's obviously coming cap
33:29
in hand like Robin Brown. She's obviously not your equal. Yeah, in
33:35
a lot of ways, And we don't even have to get into all the
33:37
ways you could stand to have a little grace. What would it cost you
33:42
to just say, you know what, you really hurt me. I'm not
33:44
ready to accept your apology. Maybe at some point in the future we can
33:47
have a discussion. But no, you got to go so hard and so
33:51
heavy for the jugular. I was just like, that's a bad look.
33:54
Yeah, And she made Joe cry, which I kind of felt bad for.
33:58
But at the same time time, Joe I don't think was coming over
34:01
there for the best intentions. Really. She even says at one point in
34:07
their little altercation, she wasn't even thinking about Katie when she went to go
34:12
couch surf, as she calls it, on Schwartz's couch, like and Katie's
34:15
like, you could have gone to literally anybody else, but you had to
34:19
go after my man, like literally like a month or so after they split
34:22
up. That's pretty fucked up to me. And so Joe seemed to be
34:25
contesting that. She said that there were months in between the text and when
34:30
she actually hooked up with Schwartz. I don't believe that. I feel like
34:34
they've been lying their whole friends with benefits thing. Like it took them till
34:38
just now to admit that they've been fucking this whole entire time. Anyway,
34:42
So it's like, I don't know. I think Katie was too hard.
34:45
She was really mean. I mean, when Laala's telling you to chill out,
34:47
like maybe it's a little bit of a bad look. Yeah, comes
34:51
so hard for this woman who is not your intellectual, your physical, your
34:54
emotional equal, Like you don't have to do all that, You could just
34:57
sit there in your grace and win that entire argument with like saying nothing really,
35:01
or just say totally thanks for saying that. I really appreciate it,
35:05
period and just be done with it, or get up and fucking walk away.
35:07
Yeah, pull an Ariana exactly. No, but you've got to be
35:09
mean. Yeah that was fun. You've got to be hurtful. You've got
35:13
to try and hurt this girl and make her cry. Yeah. And then
35:15
Schwartz is like, well, she just wants peace, and Katie's like,
35:19
I don't want peace, Like, well, I mean, I guess that's
35:21
fair, but like, this is why Lala says you're a miserable person.
35:24
This is why Lala says you're unhappy and you're angry. And let's keep in
35:29
mind that I think Schwartz and Katie had been separated slash divorce for about a
35:36
year at the time of this filming, maybe a year and a half,
35:37
Okay, So I mean it's still a bit fresh. Yeah, And I
35:40
think Joe moving so quickly to hook up with Tom was probably really painful at
35:45
the time. Yep. So I mean I understand where the emotion is coming
35:49
from, but like, you don't have the right to speak to people like
35:54
that without repercussion. I mean, you could do what the fuck you want,
35:57
but I'm gonna judge you for like, who do you think you are?
36:00
Totally You're not better than anybody else just because you think Joe's weird,
36:04
which you actually call her weird, And Laala has to say, don't do
36:07
that, like we're not fucking in high school. You're not a mean girl.
36:09
Click yeah. And then when she gets up to leave and Joe goes
36:14
and cries and leaves, I think Katie goes up to Schwartz and is like,
36:17
I've told you a million times, keep it away from me, Like
36:21
she calls Joe an it, and I'm like, Okay, we don't have
36:24
to be that vile. I mean, it's fucking Joe, And like she
36:29
seems like a real person. She might be weird, Okay, she might
36:31
be kind of crazy, but she seems like a real person who's stuck in
36:37
this vapid circle of people for some reason. I don't know why these people
36:42
idolize each other like this, Like I don't know why they go to these
36:45
parties and they're like, fa, you're so cool fame and celebrity and clo
36:47
I can't relate. I hate that. Yeah, I don't know why else
36:51
Joe would even be on the periphery of this particular friend group. But I
36:54
have to say, like all of the goodwill that Katie built with me as
36:59
just an audience member, because I never really liked her. I told you
37:01
that at the beginning. Yeah, Like in one episode, I'm like,
37:05
okay, I'm side eyeing you again. Yeah, just a mean, despicable
37:07
person. I wouldn't want to be around you either. Yeah. So like
37:12
I like that she defends Arianna, yeah, with her boundaries and stuff.
37:15
But then when she does shit like this, I'm like, damn, you're
37:16
a bitch, Like you're really terrible. He's not a trash person. She's
37:21
doing a trash thing. Yeah right, she's actually a good person. Just
37:24
did a trash theme. R Okay. And then after Sheena Marie's performance,
37:30
Ariana goes up to congratulate her, and this is where Sina's got to talk
37:35
to her again about how she thinks that Sanda fal scrawling. Why I can't
37:39
it's just be about your performance. Why can't it just be about your friendship?
37:44
Why can't it just be a download about your lives? Why do we
37:46
have to talk about Tom again? I don't know and Sina fucking cries again.
37:51
She's like, I think he's really genuine. I think he's actually growing.
37:54
And Ariana, you can see the look in her good are we doing
37:58
this again? She's like, Okay, can I just set up? Yeah?
38:00
And she goes, can I just ask you? I don't want to
38:02
hear about his growth, that's it, and she was like okay. And
38:07
then this is where Arianna and her interstitials like, I don't know where Sina's
38:12
gotten this idea where I don't want to be friends with somebody who's friends with
38:15
standable. I never said that. Cue the producer flashbags, Yeah, flashbacks.
38:21
So I don't know. I'm just like I side eyed Ariana for that
38:23
a little bit because I'm like, you're acting like you didn't have this harsh
38:28
line I have all time, this pressure on not just Shena but the rest
38:31
of the group. You absolutely have, and you showed that a non king
38:35
talking to Schwartz the way that you did, feeling super entitled to speak to
38:37
people that way and dictate the terms of this friend group, like you don't
38:40
get to do that. Yep. It's giving me Olivia Plath a little bit,
38:45
like you can't hang around the Plath parents because it violates my boundary.
38:51
It's like, you can't control what other people do. You can control what
38:53
you do, and you can remove yourself from the situation, and that's totally
38:58
fine. You don't have to fucking interact with Tom Sandibal, but like,
39:00
don't dictate what everybody else can do. Was this conversation before or after the
39:06
performance? This is after? Okay, yeah, got it. It was
39:08
congrat She was congratulating her for such a good job. I mean, despite
39:12
Ariana being immediately frustrated, as I think anybody would be, like, if
39:16
you're putting something super negative in front of my face over and over and over
39:20
again, I'm gonna get exhausted and I'm not gonna want to be around you.
39:22
So despite that Sina doing that all season and Shina doing it in this
39:28
scene in particular, like Ariana is still so supportive of Shena. Yep,
39:31
she's so there for her. She's congratulatory, and she also is like,
39:36
You're never gonna lose me. You are my family. I am here with
39:38
you. Do not worry about that. Yeah, i'man like way more support
39:44
than Shena actually deserves, especially when like in the next scene, she's with
39:47
Lalla, agreeing with Laala that Ariana's acting like Beyonce. I know, yeah,
39:53
she is such a bad, so terrible. And so after Arianna and
39:59
she A hug and they kiss and She's like, I love you, and
40:01
she does like I love you too. Then Sandoval has to interject into this
40:07
conversation to talk to she and and be like, hey, Sheena, congrats,
40:10
And this is where Ariana fucking leaves. She doesn't say a word,
40:15
no, she just sleeves. And this is where she gets mad at the
40:17
producers, because the producers are trying to keep her at the party and keep
40:22
her on set, and they want this conversation to happen. They do,
40:25
and She's like, no, I'm not gonna fucking talk to him. He
40:29
does not get access to me. This is where she talks about non informed
40:32
consent because he doesn't give a fuck if I died a fucking ditch or if
40:36
he gives me a deadly STD while he's fucking around my back. I'm done.
40:40
I don't I don't want to talk to him. He does not deserve
40:44
it. And I thought that was fucking base. I did as well,
40:46
and I'm one hundred percent team Ariana. Aycha. You could tell that everybody
40:50
in the cast was kind of standing around waiting for this conversation to happen,
40:54
like they all planned for like one final blowout between Tom and Ariana so that
41:00
this conversation could happen. And she's just not giving them what they're expecting.
41:04
She's not giving them what they want. She's not giving the producers what they
41:07
want because the producer is like, please don't go, like, no,
41:09
I need you back in. You're like, we've got to have this conversation.
41:12
He's like, I absolutely don't have to have this conversation. Have agency
41:16
over my body and I don't need this bullshit. And so she left.
41:21
I loved it me too. I'm like, pop off queen. And she
41:24
left peacefully. She got Dan. He's like, let's call a lift.
41:29
They go stand outside, and that was it. Yeah, she fucking leaves.
41:31
And so after she walks out, then Shehena tells Santoval about it,
41:36
and she's like, she doesn't want to talk to you because Sandoval tried to
41:39
go after her, which is really fucked up because you know she doesn't want
41:43
to talk to you, Obvisali. Yeah, and you're still trying to violate
41:46
her boundary because you're a fucking narc And then this is where Sandoval starts getting
41:51
pissed because Sina says, Arianna thinks that Sandoval's being performative, and this is
41:57
what sets him over the edge, and he starts screaming. He's like,
42:00
I'm not fucking performative. If anybody's performative, it's Ariana because she fucking hates
42:06
all you fuckers, and she's lazy. She doesn't film and she doesn't show
42:09
up. And I'm the one who is always historically shown up for the both
42:14
of us, but she can't fucking be ours to get out of bed because
42:16
she's lazy. And I'm just like, okay, what happened to all that
42:21
all that graciousness, all that composure, all that growth you were showing,
42:24
Like it's in a drop of a hat, it's totally gone. And they
42:29
all go over to where Laala is and I think Katie is buzzing around somewhere,
42:34
and this is where they have the conversation that breaks the fourth wall,
42:37
Like when I saw this scene at the beginning of the season with Laala yelling
42:43
like, who does she think she is? How do you get everything you
42:45
ever wanted and or how do you what did she say? She was like,
42:49
how can somebody get cheated on and then think that they're gone or something
42:52
like that. Yeah, So when I saw that at the beginning of the
42:55
season, I thought, oh my god, something must have really gone down,
42:59
like Lalla's Arianna must have really done something to Lala. I'm like,
43:02
she'dn't do anything to you, Lala, nothing. She walked out of the
43:06
room. She avoided a conflict. She didn't want to get messy. She's
43:08
conducting herself like a mature woman. Not that you'd know anything about that life,
43:14
right, That's what makes her mad because she was waiting around to interject
43:17
herself in the inevitable messy conversation with Sandoval. Yep, and now she doesn't
43:22
get to. So now she's gonna blow up and talk all this shit about
43:25
Arianna and be like, I can't believe you're believing. That's such a slap
43:30
in the face. And I'm like, why, as if you're the fucking
43:34
producer of the show. Well, because she wants everybody to show up,
43:37
show their lives. This is what they've been doing most of their adult life.
43:40
This is what the job is. You can't just walk out and not
43:44
have conversations as if she didn't do that for years with Randall Emmett, Like,
43:50
get the fuck over it, missing that this is exactly out of your
43:53
playbook. Arianna has shown up so much more in this season than you ever
43:59
did in those and you have the nerve to call her out for it.
44:00
I'm like, oh my gosh, shut the fuck up already, right,
44:04
And she even says something where she's like, Tom and Ariana were not honest
44:08
about their relationship until he cheated, So what does that mean? What would
44:13
she be referring to that they didn't show the inner workings of their relationship.
44:17
And Tom has said that there were a lot of problems like that this had
44:22
been going on for quite some time, that Ariana was very disrespectful, YadA,
44:25
YadA, YadA, And so she's saying, like, but we didn't
44:29
see any of that. We saw you show up at the different parties.
44:31
We saw we saw Ariana platforming Tom Sandoval quite a lot, super big supporter
44:37
of Tom Sandeval, but not really have a whole lot going on in her
44:39
own life. And that's what she's calling out. She's like, not until
44:44
something went wrong in the relationship. Are we even learning about who you two
44:47
are in a relationship? Wow, so that's what she's mad about. Yes,
44:52
that's really freaking stupid. Well, I mean, actually it's it's fair.
44:55
Like, if you're gonna be putting yourself on this show, show your
45:00
actual life. Andy Cohen says this to all of these reality stars all the
45:04
time, like this is your fucking job. But Lala, you're not the
45:07
messenger to be to be saying that because you haven't done that. That's what
45:12
I'm saying. And what the fuck have you done this entire season? I
45:15
haven't seen anything about your life, nothing at all. Besides you're saying that
45:19
you're sober and you have a sparkling water is your thing. Oh I'm snoring.
45:23
I'm literally losing consciousness and dwelling in the fifth dimension where it's way better
45:28
than your life. Seriously, even Sheena and Brag and all of them,
45:30
I feel like everybody shows what they want us to see, because of course
45:36
they're all human beings. They don't want all their fucking dirty laundry on TV.
45:39
And I get that, but like, you're also on a reality show,
45:43
so give us something. We can't just be watching a bunch of boring
45:46
ass people drink sparkling water and go to all these fucking parties and stuff and
45:51
be boring as fut yep, nobody cares to be produced as fuck. Yeah,
45:55
manufactured as fuck and fake as fuck. I mean even James and Ali
46:01
are boring. I mean, like they're sweeten all, but they're boring.
46:07
Yeah, And we really don't know what's going on in their life besides her
46:09
astrology readings and his endless DJ gigs. And I'm like, what about what
46:15
happened when you broke up with him and he had to get sober? Like
46:19
what about a deeper dive on that relationship aspect? Like I'd love to hear
46:22
about that, but we're not even getting that from them, right, So
46:24
why are we doing this show? And that is why you're on pause.
46:28
It's not just because Ariana's and Fiji doing Love Island. It's because y'all have
46:31
lost the plot. Yeah, y'all have lost the plot. After the final
46:36
three episodes of vander pump Rule's season ten last season, we got invested again.
46:42
Yeah all, we're like, oh fuck, it's real again. Yeah,
46:45
I want to see what happens to these people. And then you came
46:46
back on your bullshit for season eleven, and now I'm like, Ah'm out,
46:51
Like it was boring before season ten? Really yeah it was. It
46:55
was winding down. We lost cast members, Jacks and some trash bags who
47:00
are now in the Valley, lost a lot of people. Things shifted and
47:04
changed, and now I'm just like, give me a reason, right,
47:07
there's nothing, and like even on the Valley, when you contrast it like
47:10
the Valley, it's not like there's a lot going on in terms of like
47:15
parties and stuff like that, but there's gossip and there's like friend dynamics and
47:19
fidelity, yes, yeah, active infidelity actions shit. Still yeah, and
47:24
it's way more interesting because it's real life problems and real people dealing with their
47:30
life and dealing with it in the worst ways, which is because they're not
47:34
trained reality stars. Because they came on thinking they knew what everybody wanted to
47:37
see and wanting to present themselves in a certain way but not knowing how to
47:42
do it yet, and so it ends up backfiring. And it's incredibly entertaining.
47:46
It is on the Valley. But you've got these veterans, right,
47:51
I mean, doing this for twelve whole years. God, I can't imagine.
47:53
Yeah, they're completely moderating and legislating what they're giving. This interesting to
48:00
me, it's just not and I'm not by So let's do a breakdown,
48:02
all right. Well, I got to get to the very end because of
48:05
the hot mic oh yeah with Tom. Yes, when after all of this
48:09
ends and the montages and everything, the producer's like, this is the end,
48:15
and they said that was a fucking plot twist, and Sandoval's like,
48:19
yeah, it works out for me though, Yeah, like really it does?
48:22
Right? How so right? And then you have Arianna in her talking
48:28
head saying like, if this is so important to you to apologize to me
48:32
or to have a conversation with me, it should be as important when the
48:37
cameras aren't there. You could have written me a letter, you could have
48:39
talked to me in a different way, and I could have received that,
48:43
but you never tried. When I've been there the entire time, I've been
48:46
under the same roof the entire time, except when she's traveling, of course.
48:49
Yeah, Like there's many opportunities off camera that you could have done that,
48:52
but because you wanted this to happen on cameras, that's your true colors,
48:55
that's who you are. Oh totally. And actually there was a part
48:59
where she calls him out, calls him out for this before he blows up
49:02
and gets all triggered. She asks him, what do I mean to you?
49:07
And he's like a lot, and she's like, well, just because
49:08
the cameras are rolling, or like in general, and he's like, no,
49:12
I'm there for you, like I show up. And she looks at
49:15
him, and I think she knows that it's fake and that Ariana and Katie
49:19
have been right this whole entire time, and she's like, don't make me
49:21
look like a fucking idiot. I don't think she knows that at all.
49:23
I think she continues to say things that can be interpreted as support for Ariana,
49:29
but she doesn't believe them at all. She is a tom sound of
49:31
all sympathizer. I just wonder if she did that because she has a little
49:37
bit of a heart, like she's like, oh, yeah, no,
49:38
I do love him because she cries a lot about him and stuff. I
49:42
know she's fake, but like, I just wonder if there was like a
49:45
nugget of truth, like maybe he convinced her to be like yeah, be
49:47
my ride or die all season and it's gonna work out for you, And
49:51
now it's not. Sandoval kind of echoes this, and he's like, everybody
49:53
that is humanizing me is dealing with all of the heat for it. And
50:00
I'm like, yeah, I mean, it's hard for me to see you
50:04
as a human though, when you do shit like this and you're fake as
50:07
fuck on the cameras, right, and then I know when you turn the
50:08
cameras off, you're a piece of shit. Still real recognizes real raccoons are
50:14
real. Yeah, we can clock it, but we can see it.
50:16
They are pathetic. And so now let's do a cast breakdown how we feel
50:21
about them at the end of the season, starting with Ariana. I love
50:24
her, you love her? Yeah? I like her? Yeah, I
50:28
like her. I'm very curious to see if she returns because I think it's
50:30
fifty to fifty right now. Yeah, And she even references in the after
50:35
show like check the contract, like these are the terms under which I show
50:38
up to work and it's in my contract, so you can blow me Ooh,
50:42
So I am interested in Ariana if she comes back with something interesting.
50:46
Yeah, what about Katie? I mean I still like Katie. Yeah,
50:52
I mean, I know she's a mean girl and she's a bit of a
50:54
bitch, but I still like that she was ride or dive for Ariana the
50:59
entire season, Like she never wavered on that. So loyal, so loyal,
51:02
defending her boundary. Like I really do respect that. Yes, I
51:06
feel good about Katie. I think she's come a long long way. Baby.
51:09
I think that there are parts within all of us that can lose our
51:14
cool, you mean, not be appropriate, and I think we saw some
51:16
of that tonight, but like it was very ugly, but at the same
51:20
time, as a person, I think she's growing. So I like her
51:22
and I'm optimistic about Katie. What about James. I liked him this season.
51:27
Yeah, I know you don't like him because of the DV rumors and
51:29
stuff, but I'm warming to him. Yeah, and I hope they're not
51:31
true. Yeah they're not true, But if they turn out to be true,
51:35
then I just I can't see him. Where is he? I didn't
51:37
even see him who But I liked him and Ali together. I think they're
51:42
a cute couple. I think he's I think she's good for him. Tom
51:45
Schwartz, fuck him, slimy fucking worm, loser, bieber, blonde,
51:52
piece of shit. I don't like him, yea. If spineless and milk
51:58
toast or a person, you'd have Tom. But he's also very sniveling and
52:01
kinniving in the scenes. He's not a dumb person, and I just think
52:06
he's a bad person. Yeah. What about La la ugh I liked her
52:12
at the beginning of the season, I really did, and I like that
52:15
she can speak her mind and everything, and she's not afraid to fight people.
52:20
But then as the end of the season, I'm like, fuck you,
52:22
you're a hypocrite. You're talking out your ass and you're going behind your
52:28
friend's back and it's going to bite you in the ass. On the reunion,
52:30
I already can tell I don't like her, yea. And there have
52:35
been seasons where I've really liked her, And there have been seasons when Katie
52:37
and Stossy have been really really mean to her and really put her down and
52:44
slut shamed her, and I was really supportive of her. But then over
52:47
the last five seasons with the Bambi eyed bitch against Raquel, like how mean
52:52
she was with Raquel, how toxic she is, whether she's drunk or whether
52:55
she's dry. She's just not a nice person. She's a mean person,
53:00
and she's unwilling to get help. She's unwilling to get therapy, so she
53:04
can fucking get off my TV. I'm sick of her. Yeah, Shina,
53:07
fuck Sheena. Oh so annoying. So self said, I'm sorry,
53:12
but I'm just I know there's a lot of Shena stands and our fan base.
53:15
That's cool, you know whatever, But she's so annoying. Uh.
53:20
She is a black hole of needy. She is constantly in search of the
53:27
light. She wants to be platformed, she wants to be centered, and
53:30
even when she's still very prominent, she still feels unless it's centered, that
53:37
she's not being seen. And she's a very insecure person. She's in a
53:40
marriage that I think is actually pretty toxic. I don't think it's going to
53:45
last. I think she's desperate to keep so many streams of income together,
53:49
which I think inherently she knows she will lose if she loses van Rules,
53:52
because once vander Pump Rules is gone, who's checking for you? Shena?
53:58
Fucking neither is broke? Nope. Speaking of which, what do you think
54:01
of broke? I hate him because some people really liked him. Why I
54:07
hate him. I hate that he was coming after Ariana the whole entire time,
54:09
saying she needs to stop being bitter and needs to forgive Sandibal, Like,
54:13
fuck you, nobody needs your opinion, right, And you're also pretty
54:16
terrible to your wife, yelling at her for her OCD and for her caring
54:21
about your kid and caring about who watches your kid, and you're like,
54:23
just get a nanny, just get somebody. Fuck you, Fuck you,
54:28
brock, And why can't you watch your kids for real? I mean,
54:30
I don't have a problem with the men being at home taking care of the
54:34
children and taking care of them. Yeah, like Nick Davis, I'm seeking
54:37
to the stuff. I don't have a problem with that, and like not
54:38
tied to gender normative fucking roles. But like all you talk about are the
54:42
businesses you want to start with Shana's money and all the projects you want to
54:45
do with Shena's backing, Like stay home, fucking make dinner, take care
54:50
of that kid, and quit your fucking bitching. Get off my TV,
54:53
brock, nobody needs you. I hate him. He's a worm with a
54:58
mustache. Okay, I know he doesn't a mustache really this season, but
55:00
I hate him. Yeah, he's and people are saying he's a worm with
55:04
a mustache too. Two point zero. But yes, Sandaval is just like
55:07
you want us to think that you're a human being and that you've changed and
55:13
you've grown and everything. I don't see it at all at all, because
55:15
if you actually grew, you wouldn't have said anything to Ariana all season.
55:22
You would have respected her boundaries. You would have shut the fuck up when
55:25
you guys were in group situations, and you wouldn't have bothered her. But
55:30
you kept antagonizing her. You wanted to turn the audience against her by saying
55:35
she's the mean one who's abusing you and was so angry, and I don't
55:38
buy it. Fuck you. Yeah, that's my hot take on it.
55:43
I think that he doesn't have any substance beneath the Veneer, and unfortunately for
55:51
him, the Veneer is on its way out. Like, if you think
55:54
you're good looking, that's great, But now you're in your forties and gonna
55:58
be in your fifties, what are you taking with you into your future?
56:01
That is eternal, that is something you can hold on to. I know
56:06
that you're a creative person, but honestly, like Ciniche, you suck.
56:08
It's your creativity, like you actually can't say, and you're very pitchy.
56:10
I don't know why people pay to see things terrible, but like you've got
56:15
nothing going on underneath, like the emperor fucking has no clothes. You've got
56:20
nothing to offer. And so I don't want to see you back next season
56:23
because really you aren't even allowed into Schwartz and Sandy. I know we can't
56:29
even see you like working an actual job. What we're supposed to follow you
56:32
around with the most extras. We're over it, Tom, So you are
56:37
so yesterday you get the fuck off my TV. So, like, what
56:40
is the solution for Van der pump rules, Like if it is supposed to
56:45
endure, if it's gonna come back and be successful, what does it need
56:50
to do in your opinion? Oh god, I don't even know. I
56:53
really don't even know, because if Ariana would have to be on it,
56:58
it'd have to be something like that, but she'd have to be entertaining.
57:00
I don't want to see you yelling at sand of all the whole entire time,
57:02
unless it's like crazy, unless it's about your lawyer stuff. I'd love
57:07
to know about what's going on in your guys's lawsuit and the house and everything.
57:10
That'd be cool, but we're not gonna get into any of the real
57:13
stuff. We're just gonna be going to more water Somalia's and fucking trips to
57:17
ta manufactured events that you guys would never go on unless it was for this
57:22
show. I can't deal with that. It's so boring. Otherwise, I
57:27
one hundred percent agree, and I think they need to clear the decks.
57:30
I think they need to recast this new cast completely. I don't think we
57:34
need a bunch of twenty year old messes. We already have that with Southern
57:37
Hospitality. Yeah, but I think we could get some late twenties, some
57:42
early thirties, like a whole new cast. Maybe you could keep one or
57:45
two of these folks. I don't know who that would be, though,
57:47
maybe La Law I don't know. Yes, I mean, Ariana's not that
57:52
interested Katie. I want a place for Katie would be quick. I would
57:54
love for Katie to land somewhere because I'm not sure what else she's doing beside
58:00
something about her. Yeah, like if vander Pump goes away, I hope
58:02
you've been investing. I hope you have some properties or something, hopefully,
58:07
But like, I don't even know about her journey. If i'd want to
58:10
see it, I just clear the decks, start over and or shutter it,
58:15
shut it down, cancel it. Yeah. I wonder if they're going
58:17
to cancel it after this season because it was such a dud, because maybe
58:22
maybe this was their like plan B storyline was Tom Sandival's redemption arc because Raquel
58:28
declined to film at the last minute. They were like, fuck, right
58:30
now, what do we do? But I'm like, you could have come
58:34
up with anything, anything better. Yeah. It was bad. Yeah,
58:37
a bad season, horrible. So those are our final thoughts on vander Pump
58:40
Rules. If you are on YouTube and you guys wanna let us know what
58:45
you think about it, Like did you like the season finale? Did you
58:47
like this season? Are you thinking we're nuts in our position about Sandabal or
58:52
Lala? Like, tell us what you think. We love to read your
58:54
comments. We read this one. I read them. She reads them all,
58:58
and she said, we got a comment on our last video where someone
59:01
was talking about her twirling her hair. Yeah, and like, would you
59:06
stop it already? Beatrice. Yeah, they're like, I like this show,
59:08
but can the blonde stop twirling my hair? And I said no,
59:14
it's a nervous tick. Shea say, oh CD tick. I should get
59:19
on the solof you should get on the soloof, like, just leave us
59:22
alone. Yeah, I up creating content. We're gonna show up looking like
59:27
this. That problem with it? Cry more get fuck dumb. We still
59:32
have to talk about the valley, so let's get the book at it here.
59:36
Is there anything else that we need to say to these beautiful raccoons?
59:39
Beatres Well, if you love our podcast, I sure hope you go to
59:43
your favorite podcast platform and leave us a glowing five star review. Please make
59:47
it nice because we appreciate it so much. I gotch thank you. We'll
59:52
be back next week to continue our journeys with our various shows, so make
59:58
sure you come back for that. But until then, please do not forget
1:00:01
that we have nothing but love for you, and please have nighte bye guys,