Latest / Healing Her Story with Riva Jean-Paul / Mending the Mother Wound: Conscious Motherhood, Mothering Yourself First, & Self Belonging with Dr. Marua Moynihan

Transcript

Mending the Mother Wound: Conscious Motherhood, Mothering Yourself First, & Self Belonging with Dr. Marua Moynihan · Healing Her Story with Riva Jean-Paul

• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: Hello everyone.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to this week's episode of the Healing Her Story podcast.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: I am, oh my gosh, just so excited and delighted and honored to be here with you today with an incredible woman who has been a really big role in my healing process and in the way that I am able to really love and care for myself.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: I was sitting out in my backyard lounge this morning and just kind of getting ready for the episode and just reflecting.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: And even as I'm already naming it, I can like feel a little bit of emotion coming up because meeting this woman and her husband really changed my life.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: It essentially saved me from a really dark period in my life.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: And the tools and the perspectives and the love that they bring into the world and into their work has been such a beautiful example for me of what love is.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: This woman is truly an embodiment of love, and it's been just incredible to have these two.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: We'll speak to just one today, but to have their support in my life.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: So it's just such an honor to be here today and to have this special time with you today.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I'll share a little bit more about our guest today.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Dr.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Mora is a seasoned practitioner who has dedicated over 17 years to alternative healing practices, including chiropractic, craniosacral therapy, breath work, and energy medicine.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: With a profound focus on the transformative journey of birth in all of its forms, she has evolved her practice from hands-on treatment to soul work, guiding women through their personal and professional growth.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: Dr.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: Mora supports individuals in unlocking their innate potential and embarking on unique paths of aliveness and empowerment.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: Her work is deeply rooted in the principles of the divine feminine consciousness and intuitive healing, offering a holistic approach to wellness and self-discovery.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the show, Mora.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: So nice to have you here.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, Riva, you already got me to cry.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_03: It's great.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so, so excited.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: Introduction.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, people are always really delighted by those.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: And it's funny today, I was like, should I record it before the interview?
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: And then it was getting closer to the time.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I think I really like being able to like offer that reflection to people.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: It seems like just a really nice way to drop us in.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I mean, it definitely is such a heart opener, that's for sure.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: Well, now that our hearts are are open, I'm curious.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, to start, I always ask everyone on the show, could you tell us a little bit about your story?
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_03: Ugh, what a great, great question.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_03: Um, the way that I relate to my story is um when I was a really young girl, I had is my voice okay?
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, you're good.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: I was just changing my view really quick.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um I had uh it's like one of the loves of my life was my cousin Carrie.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_03: And I had this relationship with her.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: She was like an older sister, she was about six years older than me, and the sun rose and set with my cousin Carrie.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_03: She was um just the most embodied presence of loving that I still um have her as my reference.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_03: And when she was 15, she had epilepsy and she had a seizure in the shower and passed away.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_03: And I um it was like so hard to comprehend.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_03: I was nine at the time, and yet I still feel the um profound grief, and I still feel the profound loving.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and when I, you know, when I do medicine journeys or when I pray or when I receive insights or you know, serendipities, it's so connected to the consciousness of the way that I relate to Carrie.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_03: And after she passed away, that was actually when I started having dreams.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_03: She would come to me and tell me things.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: And so it was like such a um poignant and uh unmistakable connection between extreme challenge and the extreme gift that came with it.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_03: Like I definitely am who I am because of my experience of being loved by her and the continuity of the connection with her.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_03: And so, with the topic today of mother, like the great mother, the mother and mood of mother, she is my reference point for the love of the mother.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I mean, like that could be the end of my story right there, as just like my but I I can see now in retrospect that so much of my work has been to connect with that loving and share it with others.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm the oldest of six, and uh having children and babies in my house growing up was such a delight.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_03: It was such an um important part of my process, and I remember distinctly my mom being pregnant so many times and bringing home a new baby and it being like the greatest and most exciting thing in the world.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_03: And I would, you know, daydream about all the babies I was gonna have when I grew up, and I was at least gonna have 10 babies.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_03: It was like just being drawn to the archetype of mothering in a way that I could understand, um, has been such a through line.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_03: And when I went to chiropractic school, I went under the premise that I really believed I was gonna pursue sports medicine because I was a competitive athlete.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_03: And then one day this doctor came to speak to our class, Dr.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: Jeannie Ohm, and she started showing just slides about birth and like birth trauma and the impact of the mother and how to support the mother.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I was weeping in the back of the classroom.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_03: The the internal resonance was so profound.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't know that I was looking for that direction, and it was, you know, the the spiral, just like coming back to these pillars of um birth and mothering and loving um just continues to delight me.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_03: And so I spent, you know, the majority of my practice was focused on pregnancy and pediatrics.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_03: And so getting to be a getting to be um just a support and a mirror and a confidant and a doctor to women going through the transformational process of expanding and surrendering, being in the mystery and making boundaries and staying with themselves as they feel like they can't stay with themselves any longer.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um definitely coincided with my experience of the tremendous challenge comes the tremendous gift.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then um, as you know, Jason's brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer um in 2020, and he was actually one of my most challenging relationships in my life.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_03: And when he got really ill, we had been planning on moving and we put the brakes on it, and we're like, no, we are family, we're gonna be here with you, whatever, whatever you need.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_03: And um watching him go through his process was one of the single greatest gifts I've ever experienced.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_03: He absolutely allowed the disease to break him open into more of who he was.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, it was a profound miracle, and um it liberated me too, to be like, you know, all of these reasons of why, you know, what's the safe decision or what's the responsible decision or what's the you know best decision?
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_03: And it's just like be alive.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_03: And so um, yeah, so we moved to Asheville, bought a house sight on scene, didn't know a soul, and um have just like created a really beautiful, ordinary, slow-paced, reflective, um inner resourced experience.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_03: And so although I don't do bodywork anymore, the the thing that brings me the greatest curiosity and delight is to support women going through mystery and the transformation and birthing themselves anew and like allowing them to use the contractions of life, like staying with themselves in the unknown and the suffering and all of it to be able to receive the gift on the other side.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: I've never had the chance to to hear kind of how it all started for you, and it's really interesting to hear this very clear thread of of birth, of femininity, of motherhood, of love, and uh what a huge initiation and invitation at such a young age to see your cousin pass away in that way.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: And thanks so much for sharing that.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: I imagine that's um still a really tender, yeah, part of your history.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm wondering if you have uh a memory that you might want to share about her, like one of your favorite memories.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, what a thank you for that question.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, um, I have so many, and the one that I want to share seems really random, so I'm just gonna go with it.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_03: I she um really encapsulated so much joy.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_03: And um, and I guess, you know, in in the whole thread of mothering, I was raised by uh a mom who is God bless her, doing the best she can, but like very immersed in the church that she grew up, it's like Catholicism, you know, her brother's a priest, she wanted to be a nun.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_03: So there was just always this element of uh being good and being seen as being good.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_03: So, you know, hasn't been since my adult years that I'm like the hyper-vigilance that I live lived with for so long was like so I was so um unaware of it of being around my cousin who was so free-spirited and playful and flirty and adventurous and um was like the the most refreshing water I could ever drink.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_03: And so I have this memory of being at like um this I don't know, it was like an ice cream shop, and we were just sitting there, and a boy came over and talked to her, and I was like, Oh, how does that just help straight out of a movie?
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_03: And she was just like, whatever, I'm here with my baby girl cousin, and it was such an ordinary, mundane, beautiful, freeing aliveness that I was like, Oh, yes, please, more teach me everything.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_03: So um, yeah, thanks for asking that.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, I love that memory, and it's nice to hear that you had this almost kind of like stark contrast to what you were seeing in your household, almost like a little angel in a way, like a little breadcrumb.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: Be like, Maura, this way.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_03: Also available, yeah.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, wonderful.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so nice to hear a little bit more um about your story.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, thanks so much for sharing all of that.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_02: Goodness.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_00: I'm curious, um, because we're gathering today to speak about the mother wound, and we've already begun to kind of talk a bit about mothering, but how do you feel the mother wound connects to your story?
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we've talked about how um, you know, you had this opportunity to see birth in your household.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, do you feel like the the mother wound is is influenced in some other way besides that?
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I um when I the way that I connect to the understanding of the mother wound, um oh yeah, it's like it's so it's such a raw, deep, sensitive heartache.
• 14:35
  unknown: Yeah.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_03: And it's from just feeling um misunderstood or wrong or judged.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_03: And as I said before, it's so easy for my intellect to be like my mom, tremendously evolved from her mother and her mother and her mother.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_03: And so I see the psychological innocence of how she absolutely did the very best she could given where she came from and her understanding of the world, and and how painful that is to deny the the sweet, pure ache of just wanting to be loved and encouraged for exactly who I am.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_03: And um I went to um I got my master's degree in spiritual psychology, uh, and then stayed for an extra third year for an emphasis on consciousness, health, and healing, and then stayed for like 10 years more just to be a TA.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_03: But I bring that up because like that program really invited me into allowing myself to feel the feelings of it.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_03: And what happened was when I allowed myself to just be like, ugh, it hurts so much to not be understood or be made wrong or not have time for all of these insights came forward of um I guess what I want to say about that is like the natural occurrence of um meeting knowing that my job now was to meet that tenderness within myself.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_03: And how that's gonna be a lifelong journey, and how actually that's a beautiful journey.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_03: If I if my journey, and I I really believe that just the feminine in general, if our journey is a part of it is to continually meet ourselves with unconditional love and regard and really be make room for whatever experience that we're having, um, that is a beautiful journey.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I would agree.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_00: I've been on that journey since uh we've met and since yeah, I've I've been in the Revelation Breathwork community.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and it's so worth it.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_03: So it's the both ends, right?
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like taking radical responsibility for my understanding of my life right now and not denying the path that I walked to get here.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_00: Beautiful.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: Well, how would you um define the mother wound, or how would you say it shows up in and in women that you've maybe worked with over the years?
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, what a rich question.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_03: You know, um, it's like I wonder if if this is how you see it too, Riva.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, it's like it gets all jumbled with the sister wound and like the friend wound.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_03: It's just like this big feminine wound of belonging to me, like feeling like you're that you're safe in relationship, that you're it's not even understood because there's so much space to love and not be understood.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_03: But just to be like, oh, if I misstep or if I say the wrong thing, I'm not gonna be completely abandoned, right?
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_03: Or I'm not gonna be completely punished or whatever.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: It's just like this, um, like this amplified insecurity of like, do you like me?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_03: And then what do I have to do to make you like me?
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_03: Because then I'll be safe.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_03: And then this whole performance um experience.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, I actually haven't publicly spoken about this, but this past year I had like my this is an exaggeration, I was about to say my worst nightmare.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_03: Not my worst nightmare, but something that was terrifying to me.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_03: But I was really rejected by one of my very dear close friends, and she was not available to communicate about it, and um the heartache that I felt was so profound and deep, and I absolutely recognized it was built up from so many years and you know, the original wounding.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_03: But essentially, um now given my understanding and the capacity that I have, it was it's been the greatest thing.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_03: It's like, oh, I I'm okay.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's not the end of the world.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, I have more space for myself.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_03: And what I've noticed is just way much, way more inner freedom.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_03: And um yeah, and then like uh an awareness of like, wow, I really even with you know, even with what I know, there's just this holy protection happening within myself that I wasn't even aware of.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, wow.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, really hearing this thread of it being not so much about the relationship themselves, but more about just the sense of belonging, really.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: And it makes a lot of sense to me because I know as as women and in female bodies, we are more um sensitive to that social engagement network.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: And those wounds can be some of the most painful wounds.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: I've definitely been through a couple of those um myself as well.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I wonder if you have this experience too, Riva, where it's, you know, that dance of the intellect of being like, well, they're not my friend anyway, and they don't blah, and how that's just such a band-aid, and there's no like deep salve in that.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_03: It's just like then it just turns into this like loop of essentially getting away from ourselves, like getting away from the exquisite and wise tenderness that is only calling us inward to where the medicine is, just being like, can I mother myself here?
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yeah, yeah.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's where we could maybe start to um, yeah, kind of like take the conversation is like learning how to mother ourselves and um what it means to mother ourselves.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm curious, could you share a little bit about kind of like your mothering journey, both as a mother of four and also as just kind of like the mother of your business in this beautiful life that you've built for yourself?
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um yes, I would love to do that.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I guess the way that I want to start to answer that is as I said earlier, I've always really felt so such a strong desire to mother.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_03: And um, Jason and I have been together since high school.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_03: And so um we started, I don't know if it's young or whatever.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: We started when we started, and I was in my mid-20s, and I, you know, I remember leaving the hospital.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_03: I had my first son in the hospital and being like, this is okay.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_03: Like they trust me, like we're gonna, nobody's gonna come and like tell me what to do.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and we lived uh 3,000 miles away from my family, and how that was so important for me to find my voice, for me to find my rhythm, for me to feel what it was like for me to mother and not um rely on old antiquated systems that I had just broken free from.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and it was really difficult.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_03: We had four young boys back to back, and I uh it was like I was I was masculine in my mothering for a long time.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_03: I was very like action-oriented and production driven, and this was all of these things that I had witnessed and learned from I mean, just when you got you gotta do what you gotta do.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_03: And it actually worked quite well.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_03: Like I worked and I Jason traveled and and I felt like uh an ego validation of like I am so strong and powerful, and I can until until I couldn't, until I ate humble pie big time, and there was like you know, a cascade of events.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_03: I think my second son in particular um is just like very there's terms for like spirited child.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_03: He was a wild child.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_03: He was like, you know, like did not have the fear of.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um, authority that was so deeply instilled within myself, which is like so healthy for me to be taught.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but it was terrifying, and I really grappled with like his behavior as an indicator of like clearly I'm not doing a good job with him.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_03: Whereas his behavior was such an indicator of his internal knowing and freedom and like breaking outside of a very narrow box of what good is.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but yeah, so I guess eventually uh how I was relating to mothering really did soften and shift, and I was able to trust more.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_03: It was being like, oh, everyone is okay.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_03: Like their spiritual curriculum has nothing to do with me per se.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm here as a guide and a person to love on them, but their dharma is between themselves and God.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_03: Like I just have to show up and be myself and do my best, and I'm nailing it.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_03: Like they did sign up for this with me, just as I signed up for this with them.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then they became much more playful and curious and intuitive, um, because I wasn't as afraid.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_03: Like I really held it, like I need to do this right for them to be okay.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_03: But more than that, it was like for me to be okay.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yeah.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there's that fear that you've named again of just wanting to get things right and to be perfect.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I know for me it's been a lot, um, a lot of that fear has been tied to perception, really, like afraid of how other people um will see me.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it's also lovely to hear your shift into this more kind of feminine way of mothering.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, there was one other little thread I was gonna name.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, there it is.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: Um, about you, this piece about you wanting to start your motherhood journey away from your family.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: Whereas we might intuitively think, oh, it's, you know, we need to have support and we want to be close to these systems.
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_00: But if these systems are not the same systems that you're wanting to perpetuate in your family, while it might be easier and more comfortable to stay closer to the support systems that you know, it's not necessarily what's gonna help you uh be the mother that you want to be.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah, absolutely.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so glad that you picked up on that.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, it was um it was so wise to follow that thread and not um yeah, not not make a decision based on lack.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_03: It was like, yeah, did we have as much help?
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_03: No, but in the long run, um I think we saved a lot on therapy.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_03: I think that uh yeah, no, it was it was very clear.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_03: Uh and I I I I feel like yeah, it was really necessary, it was really clear.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_03: And now Jason's mom and stepdad live four minutes away, and uh we are so established in our way of being, like I feel like an adult, hallelujah, most of the time.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_03: And so there is more of a dialogue and like co-creative experience for our family.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_03: But uh, you know, 20 years ago that I would have it would have not been the case.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, that's um interesting for me to hear too.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_00: As we are before we started today, I was talking about my desires for being a mother and wanting to have a different way of of mothering in my life as well.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that would probably be really helpful for me too.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and you know, my background was uh health and well-being.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_03: And my mom and my dad are both in very traditional um medical care, and so just the decisions that I felt very drawn to, they took as very personal.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, oh no, nope, I cannot love you guys.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_03: We'll see you at Christmas.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_02: Like, oh no, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm curious about your um birthing journeys.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_00: Did you have births in your hospital in hospitals or at home or some sort of combination?
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_03: So I had my first son um while I was still in chiropractic school.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_03: And so we were using um government-funded midwifery care.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_03: They had this great program called uh AIME, which is no longer in existence, but I was able to have midwifery care and burst in a hospital.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_03: Um and it was the the pregnancy care was so beautiful and wonderful, and the birth itself was not.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_03: And that was such a great um information piece where I have so much compassion for women who go through um such disempowering experiences of trusting their body and whatnot.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_03: And so with my other three, I had them at home, and I at the time, with the other three, I was working in a midwifery clinic.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so it was so wonderful just to like really be involved in that consciousness of like you are completely embedded with all that you are designed to birth your child, you are designed to expand and to to break through old like fascial adhesions that still hold memories that you are desiring to liberate yourself from.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like there, it's all about just your willingness to be present with yourself as opposed to let me tell you when to push and let me tell you what position to get in, but just to be uh like reverence and witnessing and encouraging you.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_03: So, I mean, talk about mothering.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_03: It was just this complete um uh being able to reside in this mother consciousness of like, ah, I love you, you're doing it regardless of what the birth ends up looking like, it's perfect and you're you're showing up for it.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_03: And the the baby's wisdom is co-creating the birth that they need as well.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_03: And it was just this very um compassionate and expansive and not dogmatic because sometimes alternative schools of thought just like swings in the exact same direction, being quite dogmatic about what should and shouldn't happen.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_03: But it was just this beautiful experience with other women midwifing together.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, so powerful.
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yeah, and for my fourth son, I felt so loved.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my gosh, I could cry.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_03: I felt so, I felt like, oh, like I'm complete.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_03: I there are these three midwives just laying on my bed, just being like, You're gorgeous, look at you.
• 30:48
  SPEAKER_02: And Jason was in this like crazy outfit, like this green tie-dye shirt and this like terrible red like Hawaiian shorts, and they were just laughing at him, and he felt so wonderful.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_03: And he wanted to name our fourth son Jupiter, amazing, and I was like, Oh my god, I felt so much support.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_03: Being like, what is happening?
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but yeah, it yes, uh I love being pregnant, I love birthing, I love breastfeeding, I love all of it.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_03: I love it.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_03: Not that it's easy, but it's magnificent.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_00: It reminds me of this um show I've admittedly been watching over the weekend.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_00: Not a great show, but entertaining.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um, The Secret Lives of Mormon Housewives.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um said that when she gives birth, that's the closest she feels to God.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, totally.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it's a definite um, I I love that she said that.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_03: And um, I've heard many women say it's a psychedelic experience.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_03: We've heard of ecstatic birth, yeah, where people have orgasmic birth.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_03: And it's like, yeah, all when we're, you know, spoon-fed fear as young girls looking at television shows of women in agony and pain and people yelling at them in a stressful environment, um, it's just this natural disconnect that happens to the miracle and the capacity and the wonder that we live in.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's like, what if it doesn't have to be agony?
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_03: What if it actually could be pleasurable?
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_03: What if it feels like you're closer to God?
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_03: What if it feels like you're on a psychedelic adventure of loving?
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what if?
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_03: And um yeah, I think it's really exciting that more and more people are sharing about that.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there's definitely a shift in the consciousness and in our collective.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I am seeing more women um kind of breaking free from some of these old systems and ways of doing things and wanting to create something new and something more empowering because the female body, like to me, is it's like one of the most powerful magical things in the world.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_03: I'm biased, but it's a portal, it's a portal for heaven on earth, it's the portal for life.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_03: And I think that um, you know, pleasure has everything to do with it, and we're taught for so many of us due to culture and religion and just fear that um, you know, prioritizing your pleasure is dirty or sinful or bad or wrong.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_03: But meanwhile, it's that is how we connect to bringing more life onto the planet, yeah.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_03: Potentially our life.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yeah.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_00: Life would not exist without it.
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: Wonderful.
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_00: Could you speak to how what we're kind of naming here, this mothering, this connection to birth, and really wanting to feel a sense of belonging and coming home to ourselves.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_00: How is that related to our relationship to the earth, to mother?
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_03: That's great.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_03: If you're just ever had a sight, Reba.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you know, it's specifically for women um as being cyclical beings, referring to how Mother Nature um is never an urgency and all has all the time in the world to create what she wants to create.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um and you know, the what I know for sure is since moving here and just being curious about spring has been an endless inspiration.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_03: Like moving from winter to spring, it's like these dead sticks on the earth so many times.
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, that bush is clearly dead.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_03: Like that is a funky-looking bush.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_03: That does not, and then a couple weeks later, there's these buds that form and then and then green, and you're like, I am like, wow, we're we're just the giving ourselves time to rest, giving ourselves space for things to die off, giving ourselves permission to prune, which is no longer necessary or resonant, like um, just this very generous understanding of being resourced.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_03: And like an apple tree does not need to be a banana tree and a cherry tree and a pear tree.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_03: An apple tree just gets to enjoy being an apple tree.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_03: And um yeah, and I think that you know, I still go back to Los Angeles to do work a couple of times a year, which I really do enjoy.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_03: And when I go back there, I feel this frenetic um energy, like I feel the pace, and I feel so anxious.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_03: And I often I'm like, did I always feel like was this normal?
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_03: Did I just kind of like disconnect and uh get on board with the collective here?
• 36:21
  SPEAKER_03: And I I think that I think that that's how we survive.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_01: Of course.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um but then coming back here and the slowness, when we first moved here, I felt um I felt like such an extreme anxiety from slowing down.
• 36:40
  SPEAKER_03: It felt like I was in a boat driving a hundred miles an hour and then coming to a halt.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: And then all the silt and all the sand, just all the reasons why I stayed so busy, which was, you know, tied to um my financial well-being, tied to my worth, tied to essentially um to disengage from all of this unprocessed material that I didn't have to deal or look at or feel if I was running 100 miles an hour, was just lovingly waiting there for me.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, oh my gosh, just sitting on my back porch being like, there's nothing actually being done to me right now.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_03: This is the health of my system emerging for me to, you know, once again make space for and mother and like what I often think of, you know, when uh when a child wakes up in the middle of the night with a nightmare, like how do we mother them?
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_03: We make room for them, we just we just welcome them in.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_03: We're not trying to like fix their experience, we're just you're not alone.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and how often when we feel like oh, so stirred up and just like talk ourselves out of it, like push ourselves away and don't make judge ourselves and whatnot.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_03: And that never goes away then.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_03: And what we're dealing with is actually nothing outside of ourselves.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_03: Like I love what you were bringing up before, just our perception of what's going on, and that young part of ourselves is holding that perception.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_03: So, how do we heal, but just welcome it in?
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, the just allowing it to be there and just presencing it, like that is that is the gift, that is the medicine, is just being present with what is arising.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_00: Do you feel like um the way that our society is, the way we are so disconnected from the earth and nature?
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_00: And you've already kind of named that when you were living in Los Angeles.
• 38:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um, do you feel like that kind of contributes to what we're seeing as far as these um just these like uh incoherence in and mothering and our sense of belonging?
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_03: So good.
• 38:59
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I definitely think that they're tied.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_03: I definitely think, and you know, with the day and age of technology and um filtered reels and quick fixes and even talk therapy, it's just like I have a problem, fix it.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_03: Like, fix my kid, fix the situation, fix my body, fix my feelings.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_03: It's like very disembodied, which is the same thing as being disconnected from the earth.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_03: And coming from a misunderstanding that whatever is happening in your experience is an invitation.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_03: It's not wrong.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_03: It's not, there's nothing to be fixed.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_03: There's only places to be loved.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I, you know, I think it's Youngin.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_03: I think everything just derives from Young Yin that I'm interested in anyway.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_03: But it's like it, it's it's the obstacle is the path.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I love that.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you you really kind of like opened me up um years ago to kind of seeing things in that way, where I I forget what workshop it was, but you were talking about um, I'm I'm not gonna say it exactly the way you said it, but every uh symptom is is a sign of health.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's a sign that your body is actually like working and it's communicating to you.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, and that's so um controversial in our society where it's just like you've got pain, numb that.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_03: You've got a symptom, like get that, get rid of that.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_03: But if we just even use the example of like we smash our leg on the side table, like the pain in our leg is health.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_03: It's indicating like for us to pay attention, for us to tend, for us to be aware.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_03: If fever, a fever is an indication of health.
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_03: Something's happening in your body, and your body is responding to it and purifying, and but we become so symptom fear-based because we're taught to be afraid of the body.
• 41:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're taught to be afraid of change, we're taught to be afraid of sexuality, we're taught all of these things where we hold our inherent power.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_03: And if we fundamentally recognize that our body holds the codes to our becoming, like we have butterflies in our stomach when we talk to the person, that's not our intellect, but that's from uh the wisdom of our being.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_03: Our body is only always trying to support our awareness and our uh the feedback loop of what life is inviting us more into.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_03: And when we have more curiosity around the expression of our body than fear, we befriend the body, we try to get closer to it, we have access to so much wisdom that's held there, and just the regurgitation of what like WebMD says about what our specific unique body is expressing.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_03: And I say that from like again, I grew up with a very traditional medical upbringing, and I'm so grateful for it because contrast is everything.
• 42:19
  SPEAKER_03: I became a chiropractor because I was sick non-stop growing up.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_03: I had strep throat and tonsillitis every month.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_03: I was on antibiotics every month for two years.
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_03: Until finally my mom was like, This isn't working.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_03: She took me to a chiropractor, which was so crazy for her at that time, so grateful for her.
• 42:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I stopped getting sick.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_03: So it's like the contrast of things is so helpful as well.
• 42:45
  SPEAKER_03: And um, gosh, I can feel like I'm going off on a tangent here.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_03: But uh, so my work with helping people come to me in pain, come to me in chronic pain, come to me in unrelenting pain, and just sitting with them and getting curious, being like, tell me what it feels like, and then these memories will come up or an insight will come up, and all of a sudden the body doesn't have to yell so much anymore.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, I'm just I'm just giggling and nodding my head because I'm just I'm with you every word, and it's it's it's wild how um more people don't understand this and and know this, and um it's frustrating to me in so many ways.
• 43:30
  SPEAKER_00: I think this is very much intentional by uh the powers it be, if you will, to keep us disconnected from this infinite well of of wisdom and power that resides within ourselves.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_03: Riva, we could go there.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_03: But I mean, who benefits from us being afraid of our body?
• 43:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, pretty much.
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_03: And what's the cost of just being curious and soft and just willing to soften around the experience?
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it's it's a very low ask, and because of our wiring is set since the birth to be like, you are not inherently healthy without medical intervention.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um it's it's it's difficult.
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_03: Like there's uh I have a lot of compassion for, you know, if people have not ever questioned their inherent vitality and well-being.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, how it's like, wait, but that feels dangerous.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_03: That feels scary.
• 44:38
  SPEAKER_03: And so what we're actually grappling with is just this subconscious, again, fear of the body, fear of death.
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, which to me is like this kind of like shift that you're naming to being more curious and more compassionate.
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_00: It feels very feminine to me.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_00: And it feels like a more feminine way of approaching the healing process and approaching our bodies.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interestingly enough, in our very patriarchal society, it's just interesting to see the ripple effects of what kind of like devaluing feminine values, the ripple effect that that creates, the twinkle-down effects that that that creates.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, to me, like a lot of my work is rooted in the idea that the medicine that our world needs is this more feminine way of being and and living in the world.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_00: Uh is that something that feels true for you?
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_03: I feel um, gosh, it's just a great thing.
• 45:45
  SPEAKER_03: I mean it's making me think about what you were referencing before about like the Mormon um birthing show.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_03: And um I do feel like there is there's a controversy about uh people, women being drawn to like trad wife type of thing.
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_03: And um I've been an inquiry about okay, I'm I'm gonna stick a pin in that, but um yes, like I I've been an inquiry with myself about the difference between ambition and devotion and how much of our training just as humans has been so ambitious driven, which is inherently coming from a place of lack.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_03: It's inherently coming from a place of like you need to do it correctly in order for it to happen, separation.
• 46:36
  SPEAKER_03: Whereas devotion to me feels just inherently feminine in the surrender, in the receivership, in the like thy will be done, like show me.
• 46:48
  SPEAKER_03: I I just I've I am devoted to the calling of my heart.
• 46:53
  SPEAKER_03: I don't need to get anywhere, and how that is inherent abundance consciousness.
• 46:59
  SPEAKER_03: And I um I've spent quite an quite a large amount of time in more recent years in um masterminds with female entrepreneurs and like very, very like seven-figure, eight-figure business owners, and um it's amazing, yeah, it's incredible.
• 47:19
  SPEAKER_03: Like there's so much life force happening and like empowered, like, of course you can do that.
• 47:28
  SPEAKER_03: Like, just give it a go.
• 47:30
  SPEAKER_03: Just try, see, and like so permission giving.
• 47:33
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and also initially when I was um in these groups, I felt so much pressure.
• 47:41
  SPEAKER_03: I felt the way that I was relating to it was very ambitious and like I'm not enough, and I'm not doing it right, and etc.
• 47:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so I think I mean everything is everything, and how we relate to ourselves when we're in any type of environment is actually what we're experiencing.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_03: But um, yeah, I that is the thing that holds all of my interest right now.
• 48:09
  SPEAKER_03: So when I am embarking upon like an inspiration, there's so much space being like, how can I just be devoted to it?
• 48:18
  SPEAKER_03: Rather than how do I make this something and how do I get it out there, and how do I, which was how I've been how I've related to other projects in the past.
• 48:29
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, thank you for that.
• 48:30
  SPEAKER_00: That was like a little portal opened up over here because I've I've I really work with this energy, this frequency of devotion.
• 48:39
  SPEAKER_00: And it's it's one of the gene keys too.
• 48:41
  SPEAKER_00: I forget which key it is, and I have the gate and my human design chart.
• 48:45
  SPEAKER_00: And so I I'll I study it and I'll just listen to the gene keys.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I was listening to the one on it's commitment, and then the next step after commitment is devotion, and I just burst into tears, just like hearing about what devotion really is.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I think you've named it here so beautifully, too, about it not being because we're trying to get somewhere, it's because I forget what you said, the calling of my heart or or something like that.
• 49:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 49:15
  SPEAKER_03: Well, yeah, this is the book that I'm currently writing.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_03: So glad that you're all portals opening.
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_03: Uh so coming from you, that's all the feedback I need.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, wonderful.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, well, that's that's exciting.
• 49:27
  SPEAKER_00: You'll have to keep me updated on that how that unfolds.
• 49:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 49:33
  SPEAKER_00: Well, we are we're slowly kind of making our way towards um the end of the episode.
• 49:38
  SPEAKER_00: And we've kind of, I love all of our little sidebars that we've uh kind of covered here.
• 49:43
  SPEAKER_00: And just to kind of bring it back to um the mother journey, um, I'm curious, could you speak to how you care for yourself as a mother while you were also mothering your life and four children?
• 50:02
  SPEAKER_03: Oh wonderful.
• 50:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I love that you're bringing in gene keys because when I learned about human design, good lord, it was the most permission-giving experience on the manifestor.
• 50:17
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't surprise me.
• 50:20
  SPEAKER_03: Really?
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_03: I was trying to mother as a generator so hard.
• 50:26
  SPEAKER_03: I was trying to model myself from this understanding of what like a good mom is.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_03: And for some reason, I was feeling wildly depleted and resentful and overwhelmed.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so the best way that I've learned to mother myself is to just really follow my pace and my cues, which means I have um I have a lot of downtime.
• 50:56
  SPEAKER_03: I have a lot of alone time.
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_03: Jason is a generator and he just loves to go, go, go.
• 51:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I have to say that when I first started giving myself permission to be like, no, I'm actually like gonna delegate this task.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna hire a nanny to take them to the park today, or I'm going to, I was met with a lot of judgment from my family of origin.
• 51:18
  SPEAKER_03: And all of these aspects that I've tried to avoid by being seen as selfish, by being seen as irresponsible, by seeing and being like, no, this is me actually doing it really well.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_03: It's just different.
• 51:34
  SPEAKER_03: And if that is, if the judgment is a part of this um alchemy that being the full mother gives me, like, um, that too is welcomed.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_03: And so I guess kind of also circling back to the mother wound and everything, um, it was so painful to be deeply misunder, deeply misunderstood by my mother, yeah, deeply misunderstood by my mother-in-law and all of these women that I do hold in high regard.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and um what an important threshold it was for me to be like, I'm okay, there's space for you to feel disappointment.
• 52:22
  SPEAKER_03: That has nothing to do with me.
• 52:24
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm willing to feel whatever shame or guilt or overwhelm that's happening inside of me because that's mine, and you're free to have whatever experience that you're having inside of you because that's yours, and I'm gonna get busy too, loving all my children.
• 52:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_00: And what if like you giving yourself that time and that space is actually the best thing that you could do for your children?
• 52:50
  SPEAKER_03: A billion percent.
• 52:53
  SPEAKER_02: I am not good.
• 52:56
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody likes to be around me.
• 52:59
  SPEAKER_03: Let me tell you.
• 53:01
  SPEAKER_03: And it's very simple, it's just different, it's very, it's very doable.
• 53:06
  SPEAKER_03: It's just I get to deal with this old pattern of like, uh, are they gonna think that it's like, oh yeah, here it is again.
• 53:14
  SPEAKER_03: I've got space for this.
• 53:16
  SPEAKER_03: That's totally fine.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_03: Here we are, spiral path.
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna go lay down.
• 53:24
  unknown: Yeah.
• 53:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I love that.
• 53:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, thanks so much for naming that.
• 53:28
  SPEAKER_00: We talk a lot about um our rhythms on this show and being true to your rhythm and and following your pace and your rhythm.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm really grateful that you brought that in today.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_03: This was so much fun, Riva.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I know.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I could just talk to you for hours.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe we'll uh we'll have you come back and we can talk um, yeah, a little bit more about many other things.
• 53:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but for today, I'm curious for anyone listening, um, are there any um, and not to say that you know it can all be solved with easy tips and tools, but what would you say would be like a couple of things that people could begin leaning into on either if they're on a motherhood journey or they're just embarking on their motherhood journey, or they're just wanting to mother themselves in new ways.
• 54:22
  SPEAKER_03: I had this insight relatively recently as I was talking to you before the show about the great mother.
• 54:32
  SPEAKER_03: And it was essentially there's only two problems in life.
• 54:37
  SPEAKER_03: Love these little catchphrases, right?
• 54:40
  SPEAKER_03: One quote unquote problem is that when we see someone else suffering, to the best of our ability, we want to be the presence of the mother with them, and whatever that looks like.
• 54:51
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and the other problem of existence is that when we actually believe that there's a problem, and it's the same medicine, it's to get ourselves as close to the mother as possible, um, and whatever that means for the person.
• 55:12
  SPEAKER_03: But for me, that's slowing down, deeply listening to whatever sensation is arising in my being, giving myself so much space to do whatever I'm prompted to do with that, and just really welcome it as wisdom.
• 55:35
  SPEAKER_03: I love that, welcoming it as wisdom, and how important that is for us to more rather than important, how what a gift that is for us to practice that with ourselves so that when we inevitably see our children having tantrums, acting out, doing crazy teenage stuff, there's this perspective of oh, they're suffering.
• 56:02
  SPEAKER_03: How can I just bring them closer to the mother?
• 56:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 56:08
  SPEAKER_00: Well, and if you can do that for yourself, it's gonna be so much easier to do that for your kids.
• 56:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, amen.
• 56:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 56:16
  SPEAKER_00: How do you um teach this stuff to your boys, or do you teach this to your boys?
• 56:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because I feel like we have this conversation with other women.
• 56:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like it's also important that that men and and males are also brought into this conversation too.
• 56:31
  SPEAKER_03: Amen.
• 56:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um, yes, I I feel like I mean, I really thought I was gonna have daughters.
• 56:40
  SPEAKER_02: I was real excited to like bleed on the earth with them.
• 56:45
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, talk about the Yoni and like all this stuff.
• 56:50
  SPEAKER_03: So I um I I I read the room, but I'm always I do share about um the feminine and the cyclical nature and the hormones and the wisdom.
• 57:03
  SPEAKER_03: But you know, the the feeling the feelings and really encouraging them to uh stay with themselves has been using revelation breathwork with them has been like a connecting point.
• 57:20
  SPEAKER_03: And um, you know, my older two have gone through like significant breakups, and it's been so beautiful for them to be like, can can can you help me get on to a breathwork class?
• 57:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like, can I I have so much agony and suffering, and like and they they have this tool, and so modeling it as best I can, being as real as I can, and then having this tool has been extremely supportive.
• 57:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's incredible.
• 57:54
  SPEAKER_00: I would have loved to have had a tool like that at that age, and I'm so grateful for you sharing that with them and like the ripple effect that that's gonna create when they go to become adults and they already have this incredible tool, which I mean, I I know from my experience, like how life-changing it's been.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like once I started doing revelation breath work, like that's what really I know that the the breathwork technique is more about this balance of the masculine and the feminine, right?
• 58:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I do feel like that just the practice in itself brought me back into that balance.
• 58:32
  SPEAKER_00: I was so in my masculine that it really did kind of awaken this more sort of feminine qualities um within myself and the meeting yourself, as you said, like that's so much of the practice.
• 58:44
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yeah, I just I love that you've you've shared that with them.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm so glad that they're interested.
• 58:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, right.
• 58:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because they could go, okay, mom.
• 58:58
  SPEAKER_02: They just fall asleep.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_00: Totally.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_00: Just for my uh curiosity, when did you start offering breath work to them?
• 59:07
  SPEAKER_00: About what age were they?
• 59:09
  SPEAKER_03: You know, Jason actually started, um, he would go to their school when they were in middle school, and he would go to their class and have a revised um playlist.
• 59:17
  SPEAKER_03: It was like 15 minutes, and um, it was really awesome to see uh middle school's terrible, it's so awful.
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's like so angsty and like well, and just to see that there was like some sort of catharsis.
• 59:32
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 59:33
  SPEAKER_03: Uh so it was about middle school, yeah.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, wow, so cool.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'll have to play with that in my world because I work with kids too, and I haven't put breath work in yet.
• 59:43
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I've brought in somatics and um definitely leading things in a very soft, compassionate way.
• 59:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but no, I haven't done the breath work yet, so I'll have to play that.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my gosh, that's amazing.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and with the music and everything, usually they're really into it.
• 59:58
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 59:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um, we did do one class one time, and that really helped us like delineate like what was an appropriate playlist because we went a little bit longer and then they were all knocked out after.
• 1:00:10
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 1:00:11
  SPEAKER_02: They were like, everyone was sleeping.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_02: We were like, uh it really went for it.
• 1:00:17
  SPEAKER_02: A little bit shorter.
• 1:00:19
  unknown: Better.
• 1:00:20
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, cool.
• 1:00:22
  SPEAKER_00: Aw.
• 1:00:23
  SPEAKER_00: Well, as we reach the end of the episode, do you have any closing words that you might like to leave with listeners today?
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, just whoever's listening to Reba.
• 1:00:33
  SPEAKER_03: Well done finding this queen of like her generous heart and her soothing voice.
• 1:00:42
  SPEAKER_03: Are you kidding me?
• 1:00:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um yeah, and I just uh I really just want to acknowledge you for finding her.
• 1:00:52
  SPEAKER_00: I appreciate that.
• 1:00:53
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 1:00:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, this is really fun.
• 1:00:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, a lot of fun.
• 1:00:57
  SPEAKER_00: If um listeners want to get in touch with you more, what would be the best way to get in touch?
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_00: And do you have any upcoming offerings right now?
• 1:01:05
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, thank you.
• 1:01:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I'm working on a six-month mystery school starting in the fall.
• 1:01:11
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm kind of exploring being devoted and seeing who wants to emerge from that.
• 1:01:18
  SPEAKER_03: But um I do one-on-one work and um retreats, those are the things that are really lighting me up.
• 1:01:26
  SPEAKER_03: And the way to I'm pretty active on Instagram and uh my website, which are both Dr.
• 1:01:32
  SPEAKER_03: Moore and Moynihan.
• 1:01:33
  SPEAKER_03: Cool.
• 1:01:34
  SPEAKER_00: I still have a Substack too.
• 1:01:36
  SPEAKER_00: Do you active on Substack?
• 1:01:39
  SPEAKER_03: I love Substack.
• 1:01:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's so much fun.
• 1:01:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, cool.
• 1:01:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'll put the link for that in the show notes as well.
• 1:01:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I haven't downloaded it yet, but I follow a few people and I'll get the emails and I'm getting more pools.
• 1:01:52
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, all right, maybe I'll check it out.
• 1:01:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because I'm not on Instagram right now.
• 1:01:56
  SPEAKER_03: So oh yeah.
• 1:01:57
  SPEAKER_03: You know, it's a real um I like the long form content again, you know?
• 1:02:04
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's really beautiful.
• 1:02:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, wonderful.
• 1:02:08
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, thanks so much again for your time, Maura.
• 1:02:11
  SPEAKER_00: I look forward to reconnecting with you another day and yeah, just continuing this journey of spiraling and unfolding.
• 1:02:20
  SPEAKER_02: Ah, what a joy.
• 1:02:22
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you, Reba.
• 1:02:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.