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Raising Resilient Kids Starts When You Stop Rescuing Them · The Parent Tap

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Your kid is being trained.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Your kid is being trained for comfort.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: Your kid is being trained for comfort.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: Soft mornings, infinite screens, adults who clear every obstacle before they hit it.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: And they get and then we get shocked when they and then they get adults who clear every obstacle before they hit it.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: And then we get shocked when they fold the first time life says no.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: Grit is not a poster in the classroom.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's a household operating system.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: And most of us never installed it.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: Today I'm sitting down with Stephen Clifford, Marine Corps Values in the Bloodline, fifth grade energy teacher on the other side, two kids of his own, and the author of the Forgotten Wisdom Book series.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: He writes the stuff parents wish schools still taught.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a high-performing parent trying to raise kids who can actually handle pressure, this one's for you.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: What do you think kids are missing right now?
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I I would say that one of the biggest one of the biggest lessons that I think that kids are lacking is resiliency.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_01: I think when when you look at some of the when you look at challenges that kids are faced with, many times parents want to do it for them.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: And they also want them to give them the easy path out.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_01: So if there is struggle, they are looking for ways to make it easier.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_01: Because the kids are complaining.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: The kids are giving them a face like, oh, this is difficult.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_01: Mom, I need help.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_01: Dad, I need help.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: And your empathy will come in and say, okay, well, I'm going to help my child here.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to help them because they're looking at me for help.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, Jordan Peterson does a great job of calling it that the devouring mother, where it's just an overemphasis on aiding your children when they should be in and they should be encouraged to endure that struggle and to find solutions because you are you will not be there later in life to find those solutions.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_01: They need to learn it out.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: They need to learn it for themselves.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it's all relative, right?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: We're not putting them in some complex situations that a 30-year-old or a 25-year-old or a 45-year-old can handle.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: You're putting it for a four-year-old, a five-year-old, a seven-year-old, a 10-year-old.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like what are those challenges that they are that they need to endure in order to better prepare themselves for the larger challenges that will come at 12, 14, 16, 22?
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_01: So if there I was a resiliency that I think is is lacking in a lot of children today.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: So how do we stop the the the you know the the softness slide, if you will?
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like how do we stop overstepping in to our child's our children's lives and and kind of fixing every problem that they have?
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: Wait.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: Wait and watch.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_01: It it's it's it's I don't think it's I don't think it's much more simpler than that.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: I think you you wanna I mean I fall I fall victim to this too at times where where I want to jump and help them and then I have to sit back and I've learned over the time to just just wait and watch them do it.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Watch them make mistakes.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: Like that is painful for parents to watch their children make mistakes, especially in public.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: That's that it's you know, watching them make mistakes on a field or in the playground in front of other kids who aren't making mistakes.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_01: You're like, oh, I want to help them.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: And you I think you need to let them fail.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_01: You need to let them fail and you need to let them figure out what they're doing wrong.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_01: Now, of course, you can coach them along and say, hey, you know, this is what you're doing wrong, but you can't do it for them.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that's one of the biggest lessons that we can do as parents as is let them fail, encourage them to get back up, encourage them to keep going, showing them what they're doing and and teaching them failure is okay.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone fails at things.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: We always I my my next book that I'm writing is called Failure is a gift, and it's and it it kind of flips the mode on for children that it's okay to to to to not get something good right away.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's okay to fail.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: It's not okay to quit.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's not okay to just give up and form an identity, especially at a young age, as someone who's a quitter, someone who fails at things, and failing is a bad thing.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, well, actuality, you know, you look at baseball, you know, three out of ten times, right?
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: You're you're considered how many I don't think there's any.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think there's one or two.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: I saw a stat that said there's only two, three hundred hitters in baseball now these days.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's crazy.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: So you're you're failing so many times.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: And and those those are professionals.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_01: And and there are so many times where kids fail and they immediately think I'm bad at this.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_01: Like right now, our kids are trying to do pull-ups and and they can't do a pull-up without one unassisted, right?
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_01: But we have bands and we try different things to get their back stronger.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_01: We're doing this.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_01: And at times when they're mid-pull, they scream out, I can't, I can't do it.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm and I immediately just get them off the bar and I'm like, Stop.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: Stop saying that.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_01: You're you're you're teaching your body to that that you won't do it.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, if you want to have that attitude, fine.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: Get out of the gym, leave.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: Because you'll never be able to do it.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, what do you mean?
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_01: Why are you being so mean, Dad?
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I'm not being mean, I'm just giving you the reality.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: If you say I can't do it, then you won't.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: And they look at me like I'm like, you gotta say I can.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_01: Even if you can't, just keep saying I can.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: I can do it one day, or I'm getting closer.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: Give your body that positive affirmations and then do something about it.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: Don't you mean people can't just talk and expect things, good things to happen, right?
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you need to do both.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_01: You need to talk yourself into that positive mindset, like you're going to get there one day, but then you actually have to do the work to get there.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it removes that Henry Ford quote where he says, like, whether you think you can or can't, you're right, right?
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: And it's it's one of those things where it's just like that mindset is, and that's why I probably can't do a push-up because my mindset is shit.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: And so I struggle.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: You can get out of your gym.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_02: You can settle it for yourself, that's fine.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna try to work on that.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: Or I think about that when I do planks.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I was recently in like a fitness like cohort, and so like doing the planks for two minutes.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, that's like it sounds easy, but when you're in the you know, no, it sounds hard, dude.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: Going through it is real, it's real tough, yeah.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean, planks specifically is one of the was one of the biggest mental hurdles of someone.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like, it's funny, but it's funny you put that up because we do with my kids too.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: This summer we're we're like, I had them do 60 second plank, and they're like, 60 seconds?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: They could they couldn't understand the absurdness of that of that number.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: And then when they did it, and then like, oh wow, I just barely made it to 60, right?
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: And then after two weeks, I'm like, all right, now we're doing 90.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_01: And then they're like, 90, you know, and and and and they lose their mind.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: And then I did it with my son.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I did a challenge.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it was my wife versus my son, and my wife ended up going for three and a half minutes straight, and my my son went to five minutes.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_01: This is after 90 seconds.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: Whoa.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: And he just kept holding it and holding it and holding it.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm and then when he was done, he couldn't believe he did it that long.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, yeah, because you were because you refused, you wanted extra more 10 more seconds, 10 more seconds, 10 more seconds.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: For so for a plank, it's like you do two minutes, you might as well do five because it's just uh it's just uh managing your uncomfortableness.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for sure.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it is.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: And and that's a great like that's a great comparison.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I love that, man.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: And now I'm motivated.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna I'm gonna go uh try to get that two minutes and extend it.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, break that line.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: That was tough for me.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, man.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_00: So no, that's cool, man.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: And so your dad was a Marine Corps first lieutenant, your mom 25 years in uh 25 years plus in the fifth grade classroom.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, growing under that that reign, like what's one rule that still applies to your household today that that you grew up with?
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: Uh one thing that always stuck with me with was reputation.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_01: I think uh they always made an emphasis on you are being judged fairly or unfairly every time you leave this house.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_01: And you but you also get opportunities to better yourself, to improve your reputation, to improve yourself.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_01: And it's not so much caring about what other people think.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: I I I never viewed it as that.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: I shouldn't say I never did.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: I I think at one point I viewed it as that, and then I I flipped it on its head and made it more so about how I view myself.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: And and that's how I want my kids to to think of it as the last name that they come, they go outside.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_01: It what they do affects like I always tell my son, I'm like, what you do affects your sister too.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, how you react to things will affect me, will affect your mother, will affect grandma and grandpa.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, it it what you do, and so reputation, and and I think that stems and that builds upon all the other lessons in the book.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_01: That helps build the grit, that helps build self-accountability, it helps build toughness and confidence and how to get over anxieties.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_01: I think a lot of that is because your reputation is how you view yourself.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: That's how I look at it.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, it it's how people will look at you and and what you do, but I think ultimately you you're gonna be looking one looking at your mirror, and you have to like what you see.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I think if you keep your word and and you like the person that you are, you're gonna keep doing things to increase that reputation in your mind.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: So I think reputation was something that always stuck with me from my parents from from a long from a long age.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: And Cliff, so you speak in elementary middle schools across the country, which is awesome.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: I was a teacher in a former life, so I remember having those speakers in, you know, you kind of assemble everyone in the you know, the cafeteria or whatever, and everyone listens to you, right?
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: So when you're in those rooms, you're kind of interacting, I'm sure, with you know, the kids maybe before, after those assemblies.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: Are you are you witnessing like a grit problem?
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, is it is it the school?
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: Is it the home?
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: What are you learning, you know, uh doing those those talks at schools?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I love them.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_01: I I truly do.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like my first job is in digital advertising, and um I've been doing that for almost 17, 18 years.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm learning how to speak to adults and speak to people, something that I've grown to become pretty good at or enjoy doing it and become at least be comfortable.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: Speaking in front of 200 children, or 300 children, or 50 children at ages, you know, K through two, or even sixth graders and seventh graders, it is it is a completely different animal where they are the attention spans are minimal.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: You need to grab them right away with with something, and then you need to keep them engaged because a lot of my assemblies are 45 minutes long and they cover off all different books, and so I make it very interactive.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: I have them come up on the front of the room, and I and I have them, I ask them questions, and I and I give them prizes and have them do different tasks for me based upon the lessons in the books.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, so it is a different, it's a different beast, and it truly fills my cup.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: I love doing that stuff.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: I would think I would say that what do I notice about it is is that these kids aren't that much different from from other generations.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: They're still children going through the same inescapable lessons that we are, right?
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: There they're it's just it's just a different model.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_01: They're still going through and navigating life at a five-year-old and six-year-old and constantly comparing themselves to other kids, right?
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: Constantly looking at themselves like, like, how am I stacking up against other people?
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that doesn't change.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_01: I think that that is something that that happened you know 500 years ago and it's gonna happen 500 years from now, right?
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it's just uh it's just where you're doing that.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_01: And I think you want to make yourself you you want to teach them that, at least at least what I do is I I teach my children that it do not compare yourself to other people.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone's on their own journey.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, but at the same vein, you can say all that you want, they're still going to do it.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_01: So what you have to do is in my mind, you have to make them as confident as possible.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: And how do you and how do you do that?
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: You need competency.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: You can't have false confidence, and then they it just gets shattered on the playground if you tell them you're the you're the greatest basketball player in the world, and then they go up against normal regular kids and they just get destroyed.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: And you're like, I'm I'm my whole identity is shattered because daddy told me I was the best basketball player in the world, right?
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you need to be competent in what you're doing, and that builds a real confidence.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that will then teach them the humility to, okay, I'm I'm I may not be the best over here, I may not be the best over here yet, but I'm working my way in all this different areas, and I'm pretty good at at this.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: I'm pretty good at that, so I feel pretty good about where I'm at.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's very, it's very like Jen X and Millennial to be these kids are soft, and you know, part of me thinks these kids are soft these days, but I'm sure the people above me thought I was soft, right?
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that think it's always a generational thing where the generation after you become softer.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_01: And I think yeah it's natural because the way technology is moving, and there's so many, so many more ways to create comfort that we never had before, right?
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so what I like to what I what what I like to do sometimes is knowing that is I try to manufacture adversity.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: I try to manufacture difficulties for my children because they lived, they live in such a life where things are so much easier for them than than other things, other than than other previous generations.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_01: And so I try to give them difficult problems to uh go through and navigate.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_01: My success has been other parents telling other parents about these stories and how it affects them.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like just yesterday I got a a text from a mother because in every book there's a patch that that a kid can earn by doing and by enacting the lesson of their own, setting a goal that the let that the book shared and then doing it in real life.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: And a mom sent me a picture of their son holding the patch and said, He finally got this patch because he was afraid of flying.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: And he went to one of those jet places where you hold up and and they and they they fly you up in the air in that little tunnel area.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: And so he did that for um he was on vacation and did it.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_01: And his mom said, Hey, if you do this, if you break your fear, you know, you'll you'll earn that patch.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: And so he was so pumped.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: So she shows me a picture of him proudly holding the patch up and ending the type of stuff.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_01: So it's a lot of word of mouth, I think that's the type of thing.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_01: But I'm working on getting an ad campaign out there because I I think originally these books were meant to be to help my children tell stories.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: So I didn't want to be the guy who just preached about what I used to do.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: I thought that wouldn't land, like you said.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to find something that would that would resonate with them.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_01: I thought manufacturing a story and creating a story would help them be able to read it over and over again um and enjoy it.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_01: And so once I'd found my kids liked it, other parents started talking about how how they was needed in their home.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_01: And then before you know it, people started getting it more and more.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: No, that's cool, man.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: I I appreciate that.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, we'll do what we can here at the show to try to help you out there.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: And so my kids are um two and five, uh I'm littler kids.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: And so, but your readers span through middle school.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: So how does the grit drill change from you know, like their first, you know, little my kids just got a lily pad, you know, from Toy Story Five, you know, from their first lily pad to, you know, your first you know, group chat that, you know, you maybe your middle schoolers, you know, are kind of going through right now.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: Uh are you saying with with technology?
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: Because you know, I have a five-year-old child with autism, and so she gets very frustrated real quick.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like if she can't do something right away, it's like she's done with that.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: Or and so like how do you handle you know someone like that, like a like a child that was special needs, or someone that's you know, maybe a little bit more abnormal than than the you know the normal population in terms of like how they deal with with with you know failure?
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_01: I that that's a great question, and something that I have personally not have able to deal with.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: So your level of patience is probably 500x more than mine.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_01: And the amount of empathy that you must have with your child, and to balance that, I think is a very fair question to have.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_01: I do have some parents that some friends that that do have children with autism or on the spectrum, and they often tell me it's it is very similar that they often let them try to figure it out themselves.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_01: How does that work?
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_01: Because, you know, do they just give up right away or do they just find their sweet spot in somewhere else and they're like, well, it's it's really what they're interested in.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_01: What they're interested in, we kind of push them towards that.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: But on the simple, on the simple day-to-day things that may be very easy for other kids and not so easy for for my kids, we kind of push them and try to let them do it themselves, even though it may be very frustrating with it.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: What I I would say to you is is that the the books that we do have, many of them talk about a five-year-old and a six-year-old kid going through some of these problems, going through some of these issues, uh, learning how to read, learning how to ride a bike for the first time.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um and these things that can be challenging for kids and and that that need to be developed grit.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like my my one-story BYOG uh part of the story is my son is learning how to ride a bike.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_01: And he we did it without training wheels.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_01: We just had him we ride he rode a balance bike for a little bit, and then we put him on uh a real bike and just kind of held held him his back seat and just kind of pushed them off.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_01: And both my my my daughter too, and they would they would fall and they would get back up and they would fall and they'd whine, they'd scream, I don't want to do it, don't let go, don't let go.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and then you know I'd hold them, hold them, hold them, and then like take quickly take my hand off without them knowing about it and see if they could do it themselves.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: What I did also was for a little little carrot in the stick is I put a bell on their bike and I said, All right, the bell is there for when you learn how to ride.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_01: You cannot ring this bell until you learn how to ride the bike.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, telling a five-year-old, a four and a half-year-old, five and a half year old that they have this big shiny bell on their bike that they they are not allowed to ring is very difficult because that's all they want to do.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_01: They want to ring that bell before even getting on the bike, right?
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_01: They just want to hear the sound and they they are fixated on it.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_01: And by having that that carrot there to be like, hey, once you learn, you get to do that.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_01: And so that level of grit that they learn how to do for four-year-old, five-year-old, six-year-old grit, is that they learned how to ride that bike and fail and get better.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_01: And then once they got it, I said to them, okay, now you're allowed to ring the bell.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: Ring the bell, ring the bell.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: You've earned it.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: You've made them turns, you know how to stop, you know how to start.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: And when they rang it, that bell became so bigger than anything they've ever done before in their life.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_01: That was the biggest thing and the most biggest accomplishment at the time that they've ever done.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_01: And it was just simply just riding a bike.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: And so if you, I figured I'm like, if I didn't have this bell, they'd feel good about riding a bike, but now they have this story, they have this level of pride that they overcame something and that this was there in front of them and they couldn't touch it.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_01: And now it is, and now it's here.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: And they're able to ring that bell.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: So whenever they're riding their bike, I mean, someone could be walking the dog in the neighborhood and they're like, hey, you want to know about my bell?
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_01: I could have ring this bell until I learned how to ride my bike and look how good I am now.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: And like they just and so they have this story about it now.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's very, it's very important, I believe, for children to learn how to figure things out for themselves.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_01: Now, when we're talking about your, I think you said your daughter, right?
• 19:04
  unknown: Your son?
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, my daughter.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: My daughter's, yeah, she's five, just started kindergarten.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she's I got autism.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_01: She has this um condition.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_01: The I think more and more patience needs to be applied there.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I think more and more I think I think the balance for helping her needs to be more in the scale of of assisting rather than letting letting her drown and suffer, right?
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_01: You don't like that that's not that's not okay, right?
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: As parents, like you never want to do that.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_01: You never want to have them uh sink or swim and then have them sink, like, all right, whatever, figure it out.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's not, it's not, it's not that's not we're not we're not talking about that.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we're talking about you know, trying to do it and then being that hand to pull them up if they need it, right?
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's I I agree, Ryan.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's it's not not an easy task.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_01: But I I I think that's something that more accomplished parents in that in that condition would be able to help you answer that question more than I would.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, you're good, man.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I have a two-year-old who's we're not sure.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: We don't think, you know, has autism, you don't really know until they're three or beyond.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, like so just trying to balance, you know, kind of I guess like it's not a one-size-fits-all, right?
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_00: Like every kid kind of has their own, you know, like threshold for failure.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_00: And and again, like you said, you can't let them like completely drown.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you kind of have to be there to pick them up, but also like keep pushing them.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: I see what you're saying about the bike, and that's awesome because my daughter is actually going through that phase right now where she has uh, you know, the the balance wheels on the back, and then so we're gonna try to transition from that to the actual, you know, the actual riding the bike, but in the bulk thing, that's that's ingenious.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: Is it no?
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: Is there I don't know, honestly.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: That's a good question.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like you can't ring it until you learn.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh my god, it shouldn't be like I'm gonna try that because that sounds like a great, like you said, that that's a great incentive to to get them to really learn because then they have they get to do something cool, you know, like and tell everyone else about it.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_01: The the moment she rings that bell when she's just accomplished something is one of the it burns burned into my memory, so it has such a pleasant memory.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she kind of gets to do something like that at Swim.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_00: When they kind of advance a level, they get to like ring a big, like, I don't know, a bell like that.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: Everyone announces like, oh, so-and-so moved up a level, and you know, it's kind of that cool, like, you know, look at me kind of moment.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: You teach, okay, so you teach uh you sports, uh, you train MMA and judo, right?
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: And and so, like, what's one thing you see uh, you know, kind of when you're doing that that tells you that like a kid's parent system at home is working.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: I think I think there's a level of respect that kids have for themselves, for others.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um, when I see when I see a child come in there and is ready to learn.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_01: And is coachable, I think, is is always a good sign.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_01: But there are also kids that are also great kids, but they're just, you know, six, seven years old and they're bouncing off the wall, right?
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't mean necessarily they're bad kids.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's just, you know, they need a different way, like you said, a different way of reaching them.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: And and it's it's it that that is the challenge, and that that's what I enjoy about coaching, is that not every kid is different, and I can't look at every seven-year-old, every 10-year-old as the same way to reach them.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I think once I get to know them, after a few practices, I'm like, okay, I'm like, this is this one's gonna be different here, and this one, this, this one may need a more stern approach.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: This one may need more of an empathetic approach, um, more of a positive affirmation approach to to get them to want to come out there.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_01: And one may need someone to be like, hey, what are you doing over there?
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_01: Get over here and and and get with the program.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and that's how they lock in.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like my my daughter is she tends to do better with a more stricter coach, someone who is, I wouldn't say like like a like a hard ass, but someone who is who is not necessarily your friend, but like your coach.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_01: Like, like, like this is someone who's gonna tell you what to do and help you out and and be on you, and she seems to respond pretty well to that.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um, not all, not not completely like a jerk, but like someone who's who's organized.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_01: My son tends to do better when he gets more encouragement.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_01: And so I had to learn that myself, where where I would found out would work my daughter, my older daughter, and then I would try that for my son, and he would just be like, Dad, what are you doing?
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: This is not working.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_01: This, this, this harder approach is not working on me, and I don't like this at all, and I'm rejecting this, and I don't want to do any more.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: And and I realized that like I needed to encourage him more and remind him of how good he's doing in order to in order to get more positive feedback from him and more wanting him to be involved more.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and that's not so much where I blow smoke, but it was more just like, okay, you know, and and I and we always say in the house, we're always like, you know, we tell the truth, especially when it hurts.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: Like, so we're we're honest, not necessarily to a fault, right?
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you can't be completely honest all the times with your children, but I do we we do try to tell them, hey, you're doing this wrong, this is what you could be doing better, and this is how this is how you could be doing it.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_01: Well, why don't you try it this way?
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I think having kids who are uh respectful to their peers and respectful to adults, you can tell, you know, they they were taught that from from from their parents from early on.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for sure.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like I had some friends growing up where it was like, you know, nice to meet you, Mr.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: So and so, you know.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then it was just like, oh, you know, my my parents love those kids because it was like they could tell that they they came up in a household where it was like respect and you know, values and you know, all the morals, all that stuff was kind of intertwined into that that kid.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_00: And they wanted me growing up with friends like that, right?
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so when I had friends that came over and it goes like your reputation, all of a sudden now your parents are like, oh, I love that boy Joey, he's so nice.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, exactly.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_01: I I talked I talked to my kids about this too.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: I said, you know, you know so many parents now in town.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_01: You know so many Mr.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_01: and Mrs.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_01: Right in town.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_01: Go up to them when you see them at a baseball game, at a basketball game, at the donut shop, whatever.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_01: Go up to them and say, Hi, Mr.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_01: Smith, and give them and look them in the eye and say, How are you doing?
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_01: How's your summer?
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: They'll be shocked about you ask them how their summer is, right?
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_01: Or like, you know, like they'll be like, oh my, like, wow, that that is so different.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_01: And all of a sudden, they will start to like you and they will be looking forward to when they see you next.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_01: Because then they're like, oh, look at this.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_01: There, here's little Ryan Clifford, seven-year-old, asking me how my day was.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: He's asking me how the Yankees are, you know, like it's just, it's just, it's, it's, they started liking him.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_01: So because I have three of those kids now that I have I have kids who come up to me and they're like, hey, Coach Clifford, hey, hey, hey, Mr.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_01: Clifford, how are you?
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_01: And like they always have this big smile on their face and they see me, and I'm like, I love that kid.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: I love that like those are like my favorite kids, right?
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_01: And so if that kid ever asks for a favor, I'm I'm gonna help them, you know?
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_01: And so I teach my kids, I'm like, listen, I was like, if you, if you, if you're a nice people and you are kind and you are a good person and you ask and you say hi to these people, I'm like, they're gonna feel the same way about you.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: And imagine how many allies you would have if you just said hi to people.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like, it's not that hard.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, you just say hi to people normally, you know who they are, so why walk by them and don't say anything at all?
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_01: And so many kids do that.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_01: So many kids just walk right by you and they know who you are, right?
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_01: Because they're not taught that.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so I try to teach my kids the soft skills of being the interpersonal skills too.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like look them in the eye, show, like shake the hand with respect, and then ask them about their day.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_01: And it's so funny because they get so nervous when they ask them about their day.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what do I say?
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, well, just say, you know, how you doing?
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_01: Say why are gas prices so high, or or so say say something that for real, you know, just just you know, ask say something about the weather, like like you know, anything like that.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: And it just it would be funny.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_01: And they'll they'll then they'll get a kick at it.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_00: That would, yeah, that would definitely like make my day, I think, as you know, as a parent and a former teacher to have a student, you know, former student come up and be like ask me about you know, something that's just like you know, adults would kind of you know kind of conversate about, but you know, that's that's that's awesome, man.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so how do you handle my last question here?
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_00: How do you handle screen time with your kids?
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: I I I feel like you know, I I'm like you.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm a dad who loves sports, and you know, I I I want to be involved with my kids as as much as I can with their sports, you know, lives, and because that's what I was, you know, that's what my dad did for me, and that's what I want to do for my kids.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_00: But how do you handle like the screen time with that what you know that comes with, oh, let's watch the game or let's do this or that?
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: Because I know like, you know, I don't know.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just curious how you handle it with your own, with your own household.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it's a good question.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_01: And it's and it's ever evolving, right?
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_01: So when my kids were two and five, um, you know, and still now they don't have tablets.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_01: We I we saw that from an early age, how kids can become addicted to that.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so we and not to judge if anyone because some we people do.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's not like it's like we're um this is just what we decide to do.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's not that we're better than anyone else when in this decision, it's just we what we decided.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I think what we we have we have tablets for them, but we only break them out for like a plane ride, or if it's like a super long drive, like a four, five hour, six-hour drive, we'll we'll do we'll we'll let them have that in the back.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_01: My son ends up not using it because he hates headphones, so he's like, I don't like using it.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: But I I will tell you in the summertime we're watching more TV just because you know they're they don't have to go to bed so early, so we're we're watching more summer movies, like it's more movie nights during during the time than we normally do, but during the week there's no TV.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_01: During the during the school week, there's no TV.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: If there is TV, it's like uh they can watch the Mets game with me.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_01: You know, like I'll put the Mets game on like a Tuesday night and they can watch that.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I help them learn the game a little bit and like had like bond with dad.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: But they're not coming home and putting on YouTube.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um they're not allowed to do that.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like that that's just not allowed in the house.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um if there are there are educational programs that we like to watch, but you know, I personally I put I put on a lot of 80s and 90s shows for them.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_01: Like my my son will watch like old G.I.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_01: Joe cartoons, Transformers, Thundercats, like he'll watch some of those things, but like more than some of the newer stuff that go on today.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_01: I will say this, like my my daughter has never had an urge to have a phone, not being 10 years old.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_01: A lot sadly, a lot of her friends do.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_01: And so she came up to me wanting to have the Gizmo watch.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_01: Have you heard?
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_01: Have you heard of what this is?
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_01: No, you're maybe maybe too young.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_01: So there's this device that comes with their own phone number, and it's like an Apple watch, right?
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_01: But but it's not connected to the internet, but it has a phone number on it.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_01: And it's I I picture it, it's almost like the Dick Tracy watch.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_01: Am I aging myself?
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you know what I'm talking about there.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm aging myself too.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so it's like something where you can talk to through someone, she can call me, so and I can call her and she can send me messages, but it's only the numbers that I program into the phone.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: So she's asking for that.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it also tells you like the the location of where that person is.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_01: So that's all these benefits to it.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: And so she came to me and she said, She's like, Daddy, should I wrote down a list of all the things of why I think I deserve the gizmo?
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, Wow, that's really impressive.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: It was a long list, a lot of bullets, right?
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, Okay, I was like, well, turn the paper over and give me all the reasons why you shouldn't get it.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_01: She looked at me and said, What?
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, Yeah, give me all the reasons why you think it's not a good idea for you to get this watch.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_01: She's like, Why would I do that?
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, Well, it's it's called steel manning your argument.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, you need to understand the arguments of the other side too.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_01: What why should you not get it?
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_01: And really be honest with yourself.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_01: And then during this process, you're probably gonna figure out why you should get it, or maybe you shouldn't get it, or this is why I should get it even more.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_01: And then now I know what you're gonna say in rebuttal.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_01: And so now I understand my argument even more about why I believe it's a good idea for me to get it.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, but until you do the opposite, I was like, I won't, we won't even consider it.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm still waiting on her to do the other side and see how badly she wants it.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_01: Um but yeah, she we're we're not getting a phone for a while for for years for her.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I don't I don't think it's advantageous for her to have a phone.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's I think it's advantageous for her to be involved in socially and be around her age.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I think unfortunately a lot of the girls are on these chats.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, but on the apps and the internet, I just I think once you do that, your childhood's over.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: I read enough books, I've seen enough kids anecdotally.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like once once a child has a phone with the internet by eight or nine years old, their childhood seems to commence.
• 31:38
  unknown: Yeah.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_01: And also now they're just different.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_01: They're in the corner of the room, they're different.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, they're they're not asking, they're not asking the right questions, they're not, they're not being bored and using their creativity, they're just they're doom scrolling at nine years old.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_01: And you're like, how is this how is this good thing?
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_01: And that's a good point.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_01: And we talk about comparison.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_01: You talk about comparison, right, Ryan?
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Now you're comparing yourself to the 18 kids in your classroom.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_01: Now you're comparing yourself to the millions and the fake AI images and the influencers and the filters, like now impeding a developing brain at nine, 10, 11 years old on social media.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_01: Like that's that doesn't help anyone.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_01: And I think parents give it to them as the crux of, oh, I know where they are, it's the location, or I know everyone else has it.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_01: I don't I don't want them to be left out.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, okay, well, what do you want more?
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_01: Do you want them to feel a little left out and try to figure out different ways to navigate that?
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_01: Or do you want them to just completely go in a different direction, not how you and I looked at all?
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I like how you think about that, because I worry I I worry about that age with my with my daughter, especially, um, you know, being five.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_00: I I know five years goes real fast though, um, because the first five years did, and so she'll be there before I know it, and it's like, how do you handle the whole thing?
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_00: That opens up a whole plethora of issues, like you said, it's just how it changes kids and all the dangers out there and everything like that.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_00: Uh and the comparisons of of you know, so-and-so has this.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: Why don't I have this kind of thing?
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I know that as an adult, that's dangerous kind of line of thinking, too.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_00: And so a 10-year-old doesn't know how to handle that.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_00: Like when kids are practicing going through those like Ryan, I feel the same way about my books, man.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_01: It's just like I know I have a good thing, but it's not known yet.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_01: So it's just like if I just stop and give up, then okay, maybe I helped other people, but imagine I could help other people and like like even more.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_01: And so that it it messes with me too.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's just like, you know, because there's a lot of time and my return of investment isn't there yet, right?
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_01: So it's just like where I I have to keep going until yeah, to but you know it's gonna pay off.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like you know, you know that you have any like gut feeling, it's gonna pay off, right?
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and uh what I say to my kids all the time, it's like, and this is good or bad.
• 33:43
  SPEAKER_01: I say, and I say it's in in some of my assemblies, I say what you do in the dark shows up in the light, right?
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: It's like like you said, no one sees it, right?
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_01: No one sees the work you do, right?
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_01: And if you don't, I say I'm like, this is good or bad.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, I'm like, if you don't practice your field hockey and you are out there, it's gonna show that you didn't practice.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's when the lights come on and the games come, everyone's gonna see how bad you are, everyone's gonna see how you struggle, right?
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_01: And that's gonna suck.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_01: Or all the work you do do, that's gonna show up in the light too.
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_01: And all of a sudden they're gonna be like, whoa, where did she be how did she become so good?
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, oh well, she was working in the dark when no one saw it, right?
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's just like you were grinding all this time and no one saw it.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_01: Like no one wants to celebrate you, you know, in the middle.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_01: They want to celebrate you when you start and then when you and then when you right?
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's just like no one wants to celebrate you before you made it.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_01: We we started, I mean, well, I started homeschooling my daughter last year for the first time.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so she went through third grade and then at fourth grade, we took her into homeschool.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, that wasn't that was different from what we were what we're doing in town, right?
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm sure there were a lot of judgments in my town about it.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um some really overly positive, some people like, oh man, I wish I could do that.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_01: I wish I I like uh I wish I could I had the time to do that, or I wish my wife or my you know, and because my mother was fifth grade school teacher, I'm like, this is a perfect time.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_01: She's in the sweet spot ages where my grandmother or my mother can teach, and my wife as well.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, this is this is perfect.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_01: And some people were like, uh, like, why would you do that?
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_01: Why would you take her out?
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, they wouldn't say it, but I would see in their voices how they would would react to us doing it, right?
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_01: And so we started this, this, this YouTube show, and I say, you know, YouTube, we started this YouTube show called Taylor's Job Safari.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_01: And basically, it is a show where my nine, now ten-year-old daughter uh finds interesting jobs and she does research on these jobs during the week.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_01: And then I find her an expert in that field and she goes and interviews them as a kid.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like she does basically does like an on-the-job interview.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_01: So she's done, she was, she was put on like Fox Five New York TV.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_01: She got she interviewed a news, a news broadcaster, she got to interview uh her favorite band, she interviewed a local plumber and got to go on a job.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_01: She went to um a the universe a university here on technology and got to inter interview a professor of artificial intelligence and robotic engineering, which was like way above her head until she had to she until she did research on it.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_01: She interviewed a principal because she was like, that'd be really cool to interview a school principal, how scary they could be.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_01: She interviewed a bee farmer.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_01: She went and doing get to harvest honey and more of the whole net and everything, and like went and like so.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_01: So she just was able to do all this stuff.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_01: And now she's able to share all these experiences on YouTube and for like uh as a kid interviewer, as like a nine-year-old uh asking questions.
• 36:44
  SPEAKER_01: And so this week we're actually going to go down to the Jersey Shore for a vacation and we're gonna interview an ocean lifeguard.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_01: Like we're gonna go and we're gonna do a lifeguard uh interview.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's something that we're we're trying to do to create almost as you said, to create better content for kids and for families.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_01: And also give her experiences, give her like these these uh experiences where like she gets to learn how to talk to adults, she gets to learn how to look people in the eye more and ask follow-up questions and and do these software that I think kids lack.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think these are these experiences that she gets to get.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_01: But she has to learn that what you put into it, what you get out, you know, and it's gonna be on the internet.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_01: So you better make sure that you're prepared when you go into these questions, better be prepared that you want to look you want to look pretty good um in what you're doing.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_01: Uh so that that's the way that you can check it out.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um we released four episodes, I think, so far, and we have like we have like I think eleven or twelve filmed.
• 37:38
  SPEAKER_01: So we're going through editing them now and releasing them as we film more.
• 37:42
  SPEAKER_01: But you can go on the inner on inner on Instagram.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's a Taylor's job safari.
• 37:46
  SPEAKER_01: I managed the account and all that.
• 37:48
  SPEAKER_01: But but it's uh it's pretty cool.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_01: It's pretty cool.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's cool.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_00: My daughter has a YouTube channel too, and she actually has more views than I do, even though I've been busting my ass at this for the last four months.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_00: But she's got she kind of just like has these willy-nilly videos, and she's got way more attraction and views than I do.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's it's kind of like it's upsetting in a way, but it's also like kind of it's kind of one of those proud dad moments too, where you're like, Oh yeah, like she's doing it.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_00: Of course.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so man, our daughters are hustling already.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I love that.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_00: I think we're doing a lot of age.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, for sure, man.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_00: Tell us more about Forgotten Wisdom books, Taylor's job so far.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_00: You kind of just you went on it, but yeah, tell us where we can find it, and then also where where the viewers can connect with you on socials and kind of stay posted on all your projects and your books coming up.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_01: So uh the books can be found on forgottenwisdombooks.com.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_01: On those books, on that site, there's five books available.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_01: Each book comes with a free patch included, like we like we talked about, how you can earn the patch through a lesson.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_01: So that's on forgottenwisdombooks.com.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_01: You can also get them on Amazon if you search Forgotten Wisdom Books, but but they don't come with the patch.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_01: So you can get them, they're a little cheaper on Amazon due to the fact that the patch is not included.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, but I would say get them on the website, forgottenwisdombooks.com, because the patch is one of the cooler parts of the book.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_01: You can always buy the book on Amazon and then patch on the site on forgottenwisdombooks.com uh separately if you want, if that's if that's how you want to do it.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_01: But I encourage people to go to to the forgottenwisdombooks.com site to to learn more about the books.
• 39:18
  SPEAKER_01: And then as far as the socials concerned, uh at Forgotten Wisdom Books is our Instagram handle.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm posting content uh quite often about my stories and just like what we're doing and just kind of parent advice and more about some of the kids that that read the books and some of the and with the ways they're earning their patches.